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F1 AIE "Baltimare Grand Prix" Part 1

Jun 20th, 2012
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  1. F1 Anon In Equestria Chapter 12
  2.  
  3.  
  4. >Bright.
  5. >That's the first thing you notice as you come out of your deep slumber. It's fucking bright as hell.
  6. "Ugh... dammit Celestia..."
  7. >The sun is 93 million miles away, but still has perfect aim to your retinas. Giving out an annoyed grunt, you roll over facing away from the window.
  8. >Who left the fucking curtains open?
  9. >You did dumbass. You're the only one in the room.
  10. >...
  11. >Shut the fuck up brain.
  12. >Wait... What time is it?
  13. >You groggily bring your attention to the clock on the end table next to your bed.
  14. >9:45 AM. Whew, still have plenty of time to get ready.
  15. >The race isn't until 2:00 PM. So you could sleep in.
  16. >The more you think about it though, the more that seems like a bad idea. There is still shit that needs to be done before hand.
  17. >Pre race driver meetings, interviews, autograph signings, etc. Busy day today.
  18. >Reluctantly you force yourself out of bed and head to the shower.
  19. >The track here provides personal rooms for every driver and crew member for the race weekend.
  20. >Think of a hotel in the middle of the facility. Convenient as fuck right?
  21. >Right, back home after every qualifying and practice session you would have to go all the way to a hotel miles away from the track.
  22. >It's definitely a nice change of pace. You can wake up, get ready, and just walk over to the garage instead of waiting in traffic on the way to the track itself.
  23.  
  24. >Drying off from your shower, you reach for your Cloudsdale Weather team polo shirt and pants.
  25. >As you fit the shirt on, a familiar branding on the tag catches your attention.
  26. >"Made at Carousel Boutique"
  27. >The tags on your new firesuit say the same thing.
  28. >Rarity ended up scoring a deal with Celestia to fashion up the team shirts and the very expensive firesuits for each and every team.
  29. >That's how she was able to pay for four Arena seats for today's Grand Prix.
  30. >As you would've guessed, Tickets for these things are expensive as shit.
  31. >Those premium grandstand tickets you passed out for free at the party a month ago? 500 bits each.
  32. >Yeah, that'll put a dent in a wallet.
  33. >Rarity bought slightly less expensive ones at 350 each. But she still spent 1400 bits on herself, Fluttershy, Pinkie, and AJ.
  34. >But hey, shes making some serious money with this new deal. She can spend as much as she wants it looks like.
  35. >Just as soon as you get finished tying the laces on your shoes, there's a knock at your door accompanied by the voice of your teammate.
  36. >RD: "Hey you awake yet? I'm hungry."
  37. >Sounds like its time for breakfast.
  38. >Walking towards the door, you reply.
  39. "Hold on fatass, just got dressed."
  40. >Dash, wearing her team shirt as well, giggles and gives you a playful punch in the side as you exit your room.
  41. "Ow. What?" You say looking down at her with a cheeky smile.
  42. >RD: "You know exactly what, asshole! Anyway, They're serving food in one of the rooms at the race control building. Everyone is in there waiting for us."
  43. >Everyone being Rarity, Pinkie, Applejack, and Fluttershy.
  44. "The race control building? How were they able to get in there without pit passes?"
  45. >RD: "Being personal friends of the drivers have their perks, ya know?"
  46.  
  47. >The both of you exit the hotel-like drivers quarters and head towards the control building situated next to pit lane. About a 5 minute walk away.
  48. >But before you can walk two feet forward from the doors, a mob of p0nies, griffons, and many other creatures crowd towards your position.
  49. >Impromptu autograph session in 3, 2, 1, Go!
  50. >They all surround you two with sheets of paper, die-cast cars, and photographs in hand/mouth/paw.
  51. >Taken aback only slightly, You both quickly pull out pens and get to signing.
  52. >These must be a group of your biggest fans, every one of them are decked out in Cloudsdale Weather apparel.
  53. >As you and Dash sign the first few items, she gives you an overwhelmed look. So you quickly notify the crowd that your kind of in a hurry.
  54. >It is race day after all.
  55. "Okay everyone, We can only sign a few more. we've got a prior engagement to take care of."
  56. >P0nies further back in the crowd give an audible groan of dissapointment. You hate doing that to your fans, but there's always next time.
  57. >Signing the last photo for a very enthusiastic muscular ...pegasus? You two head off.
  58. >Small wings on that p0ny. If he is one even.
  59. "Alright, enjoy the race everyone!"
  60. >The group cheer and exclaim good luck wishes for you two as you walk away.
  61. >"GO GET EM ANON!!!"
  62. >"I LOVE YOU RAINBOW DASH!!"
  63. >"YEAAAAAAUUUUHHHHHH!!!!!"
  64. >A bewildered Rainbow looks up to you as you both head towards race control.
  65. >RD: "Ah honashee..." *ptoo*
  66. >Dash spits out the pen she was holding.
  67. >RD: "I honestly didn't see that coming."
  68. "Better get used to it, you're famous now."
  69.  
  70. >Finally reaching the Race Control center, you both walk up one flight of stairs and enter a large room housing VIP's and race officials.
  71. >Immediately after opening the door you are slapped in the face with one of the most amazing aromas to ever grace your presence.
  72. >There is a temporary buffet along the wall to the right as you walk in, displaying culinary delights from every corner of Equestria.
  73. >All of this for breakfast? Nice!
  74. >Walking up to the buffet you notice there is... Holy shit. Meat! Fuck yes! You've gone 5 months without it. The carnivore inside you is going crazy now that it's in front of you.
  75. >You both grab plates and start to pile on the food. Not too much though, still got a race to participate in.
  76. >A plate of steak and eggs with a side of veggies for you, Dash grabs up a standard salad and a few pastries for herself.
  77. >You see the others waving you over as you and Dash walk to their table with full plates.
  78. >Twilight got here from her room way before you guys did.
  79. "Morning everyp0ny!"
  80. >"Morning!" They all reply.
  81. >You and Dash take your seats at a round table on the other side of the room from the entrance.
  82. >Where you are sitting at said table faces you in the direction of large windows over looking the front straight.
  83. >Whoever sits here during the Grand Prix has front row center seats in air conditioning. You'd be envious if you weren't a driver.
  84. >RD: "You guys enjoying the day so far?"
  85. >AJ: "You bet! There is so much stuff tah do here."
  86. >FS: "They even have earplugs! Sweet, glorious earplugs."
  87. >Flutters is still not used to the engine noise apparently.
  88. *grumble*
  89. >The sound from your stomach elicits a small giggle from your friends here. Must be hungrier than you thought.
  90. >You cut into your steak, taking a juicy bite size bit into your mouth.
  91. >Hohohoho my god. Medium rare, the perfect way to prepare a cut of meat like this.
  92. >To your surprise, your friends aren't looking at you in shock.
  93. >Considering cows are sentient here, you'd expect them to at least be looking at you funny.
  94. "You guys don't mind this do you?"
  95. >TS: "What, you eating that? Not at all Anon. I figured you would be a carnivore by your teeth. Sharp canines are a dead giveaway."
  96. >Everyone nods in agreement.
  97. "So it doesn't scare you?"
  98. >"Nope." they all say.
  99. >With that you eagerly continue digging in, everyone else eating off their plates as well.
  100. >RA: "Oh those shirts you two have on look absolutely stunning if I do say so myself."
  101. "We have you to thank. Thinking about selling some more to our fans?"
  102. >RA: "Already have! Even some of the other teams apparel. Wonderbolts Racing shirts make up half of my income at the moment."
  103. >RD: "I might need to get me one of those."
  104. >Wat.
  105. "Seriously?"
  106. >RD: "What? Its the Wonderbolts were talking about here! I'll always be a fan of them even if were racing against em. I still dream of being in their flight demo team some day."
  107. >Once a Wonderbolts fangirl, always a Wonderbolts fangirl.
  108. >Finished with breakfast, you take a look at your watch. Its time to head out, got to get to a quick meeting with your sponsor to talk about a possible bonus.
  109. "See you guys after the race. And we'll see you on the grid Twi, Have fun guys!"
  110. >They all wave as you and Dash exit the room.
  111.  
  112. >It's now 11:25 AM. This meeting has to be quick. As soon as your done talking with the Cloudsdale Weather spokesp0ny its straight to the garage to get the cars prepped.
  113. >You both walk up to an overhang with the Cloudsdale logo. This looks like the place.
  114. >"There you two are! How are you guys?"
  115. >You are greeted by a fairly middle age looking p0ny all dressed up in standard weather gear, This must be the guy.
  116. "Good. You wanted to talk to us about a possible bonus today right?"
  117. >"That would be me! Now I know you guys are busy so I'll cut right to the chase. Where do you think we want you to finish today?"
  118. >Oh gosh, I dunno. Seventh?
  119. "I'm guessing you want us to win."
  120. >"Precisely! We would love to see a one-two finish from you guys in today's Grand Prix. But I'll make it a bit easier for you. If the both of you can finish in the top 5, we'll throw in 5000 bits as a bonus to both of your race winnings."
  121. >Fucking nice. You'd be stupid not to take up that challenge.
  122. >RD "Awesome! thanks mister... uh.."
  123. >"Just call me Joe."
  124. "You wont be disappointed Joe."
  125. >JOE: "I better not be! Good luck today you two!"
  126. >Successful meeting out of the way, now to pit lane to get this thing started.
  127.  
  128. "Everything looking good Twi?" you say as you strap on your helmet
  129. >You all are in the garage giving the cars a final check for today.
  130. TS: "Everything passed inspection with flying colors, tires are a little worn from qualifying but that's a given. Be careful off of the start line today. Both of you."
  131. >T-35 minutes till the start of the Grand Prix. The pit lane exit will be open in 5 minutes.
  132. >That's when you need to cover a reconnaissance lap and head to your position on the starting grid.
  133. >You and Dash are fully decked out in your fire suits and helmets, the pit crew getting the cars ready.
  134. >Just before you strap in to your machine, You suddenly hear the Grand Prix pre-race promo over the loud speakers outside.
  135.  
  136. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HI51GSwpUsE
  137.  
  138. *We're not P0nyville.*
  139.  
  140. *We're not Fillydelphia.*
  141.  
  142. *And we're certainly not Canterlot*
  143.  
  144. *In Baltimare, we do things differently.*
  145. *Which suits us fine.*
  146. >The home crowd cheers at that line.
  147.  
  148. *It means we don't follow.*
  149. *We lead.*
  150.  
  151. *We don't go by the rules. We make our own*
  152.  
  153. *And we don't worry as much about convention as we do about defying it*
  154.  
  155. *The Formula 1 Baltimare Grand Prix is coming*
  156.  
  157. >The stands loudly erupt in the biggest uproar you've heard all weekend.
  158. >...
  159. >...That promo sounded oddly familiar...
  160.  
  161.  
  162. >T-30 minutes till the start.
  163. >A horn sounds signaling that pit lane is now open. Everyone heads out of their respective garages in the order of qualifying.
  164. >Short loud revs fill the air as a slow moving convoy of multicolored racing machines exit pit lane, causing yet another eruption from the stands.
  165. >You radio over to your team mate to get her ready for today. Shits about to get hectic.
  166. "Rainbow do you read me?"
  167. >RD: "Roger that"
  168. "You ready for this?"
  169. >RD: "Do you even need to ask? If I wasn't ready I wouldn't be here in this car right now."
  170. "That's what I like to hear. Just remember our training. Good luck out there."
  171. >RD: "Same to you. I uh... nevermind."
  172. >Hmm. odd.
  173. ----
  174. >Coming up to the starting line, you get yourself in position on the starting grid.
  175. >Starting P2 today, so you're on the right side of the straightaway, giving you a perfect opportunity to get on the inside of Thunderlane's black #9 machine going into the sharp right hander of turn 1.
  176. >As a refresher, here is the starting grid for the Grand Prix. Odd numbers are on the outside of the row, even numbers on the inside. The track is run in a clockwise direction.
  177. -Row 1
  178. 1. Thunderlane
  179. 2. Anonymous
  180. -Row 2
  181. 3. Rainbow Dash
  182. 4. Soarin
  183. -Row 3
  184. 5. Cloud Chaser
  185. 6. Octavia
  186. -Row 4
  187. 7. Spitfire
  188. 8. Aloe
  189. -Row 5
  190. 9. Lotus
  191. 10. Vinyl Scratch - -5 grid penalty from 5th
  192. -Row 6
  193. 11. Blossomforth
  194. 12. Flitter
  195.  
  196.  
  197. >T-15 minutes till the start, another horn sounds signaling that pit lane is now closed until the start.
  198. >Every teams crew climbs over the pit wall and heads to their respective cars.
  199. >Immediately you are put up on jacks and tire warmers are placed on the tires in order to conserve some heat at the start.
  200. >Twilight looks over both cars attentively. Making sure there is nothing out of place.
  201. >With these cars as aerodynamically sensitive as they are, nothing can be in the way of airflow.
  202. >Closing your eyes, you allow yourself one final chance to relax. You're gonna need it.
  203. ----
  204. >T-1 minute.
  205. >The last 14 minutes have gone by like a blur. Deep thought overtaking your being as you sit with eyes closed in the marvel of engineering that is your open wheel racer.
  206. >The sudden jerk of engine ignition was what brought you out of your state of mind.
  207. >Tire warmers removed, car lowered to the ground, helmet visor shut, engine shifted into first. Yours being the first to do so on the grid.
  208. >To your left is Thunderlane, his car ready to make the one last recon lap before the main start.
  209. >In your mirrors you catch Rainbows machine lowered to the racing surface. You see that signature mean look in her eyes before she confidently and swiftly closes her visor.
  210. >Directly behind you is Soarin. Like you didn't need anymore pressure today.
  211. >By far the coolest head on the grid. He hasn't made a single costly mistake in either the 3 months of testing or this race weekend.
  212.  
  213.  
  214. >T-15 seconds, every crew member leaves the track surface to make way for the standard recon lap.
  215. >You stare at the start lights hanging above the track awaiting the signal.
  216. >Just then, two green lights are displayed before the entire grid. Everyone smoothly letting go of their clutches to start the one recon lap around EquineRing.
  217. >You quickly start your own standard tire warm-up procedure by weaving left and right, enhancing the friction on each tire.
  218. >Many others follow your lead down the front straight eventually heading into turn one.
  219. ----
  220. >Halfway around the recon lap, Dash unexpectedly chimes in on the radio. Her tone for some reason, somber almost.
  221. >RD: "Anon... There's something Iv'e been wanting to tell you, for a while now actually. I know you might think this is bad timing, but I wanna get this out if and before one of us gets hurt... badly... today or the next 2 races.... I want you to know that I kinda l-"
  222. "Save it."
  223. >With two simple words you stop whatever that was dead in its tracks.
  224. >Where in the hell did that come from? What was she gonna say?
  225. >The fucking Grand Prix starts in literally less than 30 seconds. You don't have time to think about that now.
  226. >It sounded like she was about to...
  227. >FUCKING FOCUS DAM-.
  228. >A violent shock forces the car upwards as you unknowingly hit the large chicane curb directly with your right front tire.
  229. >Because of the rigid suspension, all four tires are off of the ground for a split second. The car tossing you about as you land. Ow.
  230. >So much for staying in focus.
  231. >Luckiest driver on the grid, you come away with no damage what so ever after going over a speed bump from hell at 55+ mph.
  232. >RD: "sorry..."
  233. >Yep, she saw that. Fuck, this Grand Prix is gonna be harder than you wanted it to be.
  234.  
  235. >Forget about it. Just forget about it dude...
  236. >Was she going to-?
  237. >GOD DAMMIT UUUUUUGGGGHHHHHHH.
  238. >Down the front straight, the car responds to your sudden outburst in the form of a short controlled burnout as you floor the throttle in anger. You scream in between your teeth along with the engine as it hits 18,000 rpm.
  239. >The rage maybe a bit much right now. But getting thrown about in the car like that, plus the fact that you cant focus on the race at the moment kind of set off a wave of anger through you.
  240. >Laying off of the throttle, you allow yourself to breathe once more.
  241. >Ah... that felt good.
  242. >The car makes its way to grid position #2. No crew members on the grid any longer. Just you and 11 other drivers. Each looking for the exact same thing at the end of the day. Victory.
  243. >A drone of engine noise makes its way through the air as each vehicle is in their respective grid positions, each idling at 6000 rpms.
  244. >The start lights above the track have the drivers, the spectators, and the TV viewers full undivided attention.
  245. I I I I
  246. I I I I
  247. •I I I I
  248. >This is it.
  249. >As soon as that light displayed itself, the grid screams in power, each car and driver alike chomping at the bit to get going.
  250. •I•I I I
  251. •I•I•I I
  252. •I•I•I•I
  253. >A crescendo arises from the stands as what everyp0ny has been waiting for is merely seconds away.
  254. >Right foot ready to bury the throttle, you prepare yourself to give your all in every lap and every corner for the next hour and a half.
  255. •I•I•I•I•
  256. •I•I•I•I•
  257. •I•I•I•I•
  258.  
  259.  
  260. I I I I
  261.  
  262.  
  263. End part 1
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