You Won

 know to you I'm probably going to sound like I'm wack
But in all honesty I don't give a fuck. I'm just here to talk rather you like it or not.
I spit it all from the top and I don't plan to ever stop I'm aiming for the top
but sometimes I got a devil in my head that'll never stop.
picking at me so much my head's about to pop.

and in my life it's seems like no one gives a fuck.
this is why I can't rap about Harmony.
Cuz my loved ones I only can see in a memory.
As my ex's are erasing from my kids memory.

that's why you look  me in my fucking face.
as they really try to find other men to take my place?
fuck you bitches! You know I would of done anyting to be a dad.
You know those kids were all I fucking had.
and I hope this makes you really glad.
Thanks to you I can never stop ever being sad.
to the point I want to hurt you really bad.
and my hatred for you shouldn't justify me as a dad!
\
cuz I never once thought about taking from you the kids you had.
I swear to God you're driving me mad.
I want to sell my soul but the devil already has control.
If it wasent for you i wouldnt of touched his snow.
God this pain i wish you could know.
Every time i asked to speak to our kid all you said was no.
It's why I have to pretend Im fine
As I wrestle around with all this in my mind. Giving it my best all the time
As i fight for what is mine.
In spite of all This darkness I'm trying my best to shine.
But no matter what i'm always denied.
And since my kids were taken away
I felt a part of me pass away.
Its why i always wanna die.
no one's there while I sit in my room alone and cry asking God, why?
this life must be a Lie.
but everyday I wake It's not and i start to cry.
As People assume what they want to think.
Second guessing me without a blink.
As i try to do my best not to sink.
When its worse then they could think.
Due to my past I'm  unhire-able.
The life i live is unbearable.
As i front im doing incredible,
Struggling with emotions that are uncontrollable. My luck is so unbelievable. Its why im back to snorting drugs off my table.
Cause my dreams are seeming like a lost fable.
How much more pain can i hide behind my eyes.
As no one is there for me when I cry.
Missing everyone who fucking died.
Missing all my kids cuz my ex's like to lie.
I didnt Even get the chance to say goodbye.
Please someone tell me this wont be with me till i fucking die.
Cuz if so i don't know if i can survive...
Cause there ain't a part of me inside That wants to stay alive.
Cause all i feel inside is dead and numb.
As everyone treats me like im freaking dumb.
When in reality I'm just fucking done
I think this depression...
It finally won.