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- 1
- 00:00:21,154 --> 00:00:22,999
- ♪ On Top Of The World
- 2
- 00:00:23,031 --> 00:00:26,024
- ♪ You can have it all
- but not till you move it
- 3
- 00:00:27,014 --> 00:00:29,986
- ♪ Now take it in but don't look down
- 4
- 00:00:30,070 --> 00:00:31,999
- ♪ Cos I'm on top of the world, hey
- 5
- 00:00:32,092 --> 00:00:34,074
- ♪ I'm on top of the world, hey
- 6
- 00:00:35,002 --> 00:00:36,972
- ♪ Waiting on this for a while now
- 7
- 00:00:37,129 --> 00:00:39,037
- ♪ Paying my dues to the dirt
- 8
- 00:00:39,183 --> 00:00:42,009
- ♪ I've been waiting to smile, hey
- 9
- 00:00:42,040 --> 00:00:43,990
- ♪ Been holding it in for a while, hey
- 10
- 00:00:44,156 --> 00:00:46,169
- ♪ Take it with me if I can
- 11
- 00:00:46,993 --> 00:00:48,150
- ♪ Been dreaming of this since a child
- 12
- 00:00:50,069 --> 00:00:52,164
- ♪ And I know it's hard
- when you're falling down
- 13
- 00:00:52,196 --> 00:00:55,001
- ♪ And it's a long way up
- when you hit the ground
- 14
- 00:00:55,032 --> 00:00:58,140
- ♪ Get up now, get up, get up now
- 15
- 00:00:58,213 --> 00:01:01,018
- ♪ I'm on top of the world
- 16
- 00:01:02,196 --> 00:01:04,157
- Hey! Hi, there!
- 17
- 00:01:05,158 --> 00:01:08,129
- Boy, look at this.
- 18
- 00:01:14,125 --> 00:01:16,054
- Pretty as ever. Ha!
- 19
- 00:01:16,085 --> 00:01:18,056
- Exciting!
- 20
- 00:01:22,029 --> 00:01:24,083
- Did you pack
- your bowling ball collection in here?
- 21
- 00:01:24,114 --> 00:01:26,147
- My God! He's in a good mood.
- 22
- 00:01:27,148 --> 00:01:30,120
- Who do I love? Who do I love?
- You know I love you.
- 23
- 00:01:30,151 --> 00:01:32,122
- Yeah, I love you, too, Mom.
- 24
- 00:01:34,198 --> 00:01:37,180
- Senior year? I mean, this is the one.
- 25
- 00:01:37,211 --> 00:01:39,245
- They're all important but,
- boy, this is the one
- 26
- 00:01:40,027 --> 00:01:43,124
- that really takes you to the finish line.
- What do I always tell you?
- 27
- 00:01:43,270 --> 00:01:46,168
- - I got this.
- - You got this.
- 28
- 00:01:46,200 --> 00:01:49,161
- Tell you what I won't miss -
- paying 28 grand a year.
- 29
- 00:01:49,192 --> 00:01:50,224
- Dad!
- 30
- 00:01:50,256 --> 00:01:52,081
- Don't listen to him.
- 31
- 00:01:52,112 --> 00:01:54,176
- He just likes to squeeze the coin purse.
- 32
- 00:01:56,074 --> 00:01:57,221
- I just love it here.
- 33
- 00:01:57,252 --> 00:02:00,047
- I love being back at our alma mater,
- right, honey?
- 34
- 00:02:00,078 --> 00:02:02,268
- Well, technically, it's my alma mater.
- You didn't graduate.
- 35
- 00:02:03,050 --> 00:02:05,094
- He loves it.
- 36
- 00:02:06,136 --> 00:02:08,233
- Boy, here come the waterworks.
- 37
- 00:02:08,264 --> 00:02:10,110
- - Mom!
- - You know what?
- 38
- 00:02:10,141 --> 00:02:14,114
- I think I just need some cheese
- or something. I'm a little snackish.
- 39
- 00:02:14,145 --> 00:02:16,283
- OK, traffic. We got traffic.
- 40
- 00:02:17,065 --> 00:02:18,253
- Aww.
- 41
- 00:02:18,285 --> 00:02:20,172
- All right. We're gonna release, OK?
- 42
- 00:02:22,257 --> 00:02:24,249
- You're a remarkable young lady.
- 43
- 00:02:24,280 --> 00:02:28,076
- And my love for you is very, very fierce.
- 44
- 00:02:28,107 --> 00:02:31,235
- What? I'm only 22 minutes away!
- 45
- 00:02:31,266 --> 00:02:33,310
- That's 22 minutes too far for me.
- 46
- 00:02:34,092 --> 00:02:37,106
- Have so much fun in Italy, guys.
- It's gonna be amazing.
- 47
- 00:02:37,137 --> 00:02:38,273
- Arrivederci! That's Italian.
- 48
- 00:02:38,305 --> 00:02:40,088
- - Have fun.
- - Thanks.
- 49
- 00:02:40,119 --> 00:02:42,237
- Save your receipts.
- Just kidding, but save 'em.
- 50
- 00:02:42,268 --> 00:02:44,102
- OK.
- 51
- 00:02:44,134 --> 00:02:46,104
- Hatchback.
- 52
- 00:02:46,137 --> 00:02:48,274
- Yup. Boy.
- 53
- 00:02:50,286 --> 00:02:52,111
- Ciao, honey!
- 54
- 00:02:52,143 --> 00:02:53,196
- Ciao!
- 55
- 00:02:53,310 --> 00:02:56,136
- We're both fluent. I'm coming, Dan.
- 56
- 00:02:56,167 --> 00:02:58,242
- Beep beep yourself, mister.
- 57
- 00:02:58,274 --> 00:03:01,350
- Somebody trying to get me in the car
- all to himself?
- 58
- 00:03:02,257 --> 00:03:05,208
- Boy. Four weeks in Italy.?
- 59
- 00:03:05,239 --> 00:03:07,220
- Are you ready? I'm ready.
- 60
- 00:03:07,251 --> 00:03:09,253
- I've always enjoyed our staycations
- 61
- 00:03:09,285 --> 00:03:13,195
- but I think I'm ready
- for a little gondola ride with my fella.
- 62
- 00:03:13,226 --> 00:03:15,259
- Wait, wait, wait!
- 63
- 00:03:15,291 --> 00:03:17,209
- I wanna see our girl go in.
- 64
- 00:03:17,241 --> 00:03:20,171
- Ho, look at that!
- 65
- 00:03:20,202 --> 00:03:21,371
- Ho-ho!
- 66
- 00:03:23,258 --> 00:03:25,166
- I want a divorce.
- 67
- 00:03:26,376 --> 00:03:28,378
- - What?
- - I want a divorce.
- 68
- 00:03:30,286 --> 00:03:32,329
- God, it feels good to say that out loud.
- 69
- 00:03:32,361 --> 00:03:35,322
- I wanna be completely transparent
- with you, Deanna.
- 70
- 00:03:35,353 --> 00:03:38,190
- I am in love with someone else.
- 71
- 00:03:39,326 --> 00:03:41,213
- Who are you in love with?
- 72
- 00:03:41,245 --> 00:03:42,371
- Marcie.
- 73
- 00:03:43,299 --> 00:03:45,186
- Marcie Strong.
- 74
- 00:03:46,218 --> 00:03:47,386
- The realtor?
- 75
- 00:03:48,314 --> 00:03:50,285
- The one on the bus benches?
- 76
- 00:03:50,316 --> 00:03:53,173
- She's also on a series
- of small billboards downtown
- 77
- 00:03:53,205 --> 00:03:55,406
- and she has a pretty respectable
- social media following.
- 78
- 00:03:56,187 --> 00:03:57,262
- My God!
- 79
- 00:03:57,293 --> 00:03:59,295
- - Don't... Please...
- - Don't touch me!
- 80
- 00:03:59,326 --> 00:04:02,194
- - Stay in the car, please.
- - I'm gonna be sick!
- 81
- 00:04:02,225 --> 00:04:05,374
- Look, I know this seems mean but I'm
- doing it to facilitate a clean break.
- 82
- 00:04:05,405 --> 00:04:09,253
- Like ripping a Band-Aid off quickly.
- This is better for you.
- 83
- 00:04:11,203 --> 00:04:14,258
- Don't you dare tell me
- that this is better for me.
- 84
- 00:04:14,393 --> 00:04:17,344
- Also in the interests of
- complete transparency,
- 85
- 00:04:17,375 --> 00:04:19,263
- I'm gonna sell the house.
- 86
- 00:04:19,294 --> 00:04:21,296
- You can't do that.
- That's not how it works.
- 87
- 00:04:21,327 --> 00:04:24,299
- Marcie already started the paperwork
- and it's all in my name.
- 88
- 00:04:28,314 --> 00:04:31,432
- Stop it! This is a lease.
- We still have ten months' payments.
- 89
- 00:04:32,213 --> 00:04:34,341
- - Stop it, please!
- - I don't care if it's a lease.
- 90
- 00:04:35,415 --> 00:04:38,210
- Please, get back in the car.
- 91
- 00:04:40,274 --> 00:04:41,432
- That's gonna cost.
- 92
- 00:04:42,287 --> 00:04:44,247
- We'll talk about this later.
- 93
- 00:04:44,278 --> 00:04:45,457
- Just go, Dan.
- 94
- 00:04:46,239 --> 00:04:48,262
- Now I gotta use Waze.
- 95
- 00:05:03,297 --> 00:05:05,436
- 23 years of marriage, just down the tubes.
- 96
- 00:05:05,467 --> 00:05:07,480
- I mean, can you believe that?
- 97
- 00:05:08,261 --> 00:05:11,275
- No. I'm just...
- I'm so disappointed in Dan.
- 98
- 00:05:11,306 --> 00:05:14,455
- And what's Maddie gonna do? I mean,
- you've gotta cancel the trip to Italy.
- 99
- 00:05:15,415 --> 00:05:18,459
- You know, I honest to God...
- I didn't see it coming.
- 100
- 00:05:18,491 --> 00:05:21,400
- You always hear that
- but I didn't see it coming.
- 101
- 00:05:21,431 --> 00:05:23,412
- Let me tell you this,
- Dan doesn't deserve you.
- 102
- 00:05:23,443 --> 00:05:25,456
- You're such a great lady, Deanna.
- 103
- 00:05:25,487 --> 00:05:28,480
- Thank you. That's very nice of you.
- 104
- 00:05:29,262 --> 00:05:32,484
- This is it. My parents' house
- is just up here on the right.
- 105
- 00:05:35,476 --> 00:05:37,426
- Thanks, Dale. And...
- 106
- 00:05:37,457 --> 00:05:39,481
- From the bottom of my heart...
- 107
- 00:05:39,513 --> 00:05:41,515
- I'm gonna give you a great Uber review.
- 108
- 00:05:42,296 --> 00:05:43,496
- Well, I hope your day gets better, Deanna.
- 109
- 00:05:44,277 --> 00:05:45,456
- I'm sure it will.
- 110
- 00:05:55,341 --> 00:05:57,499
- Can I make you a sandwich?
- 111
- 00:05:57,531 --> 00:06:01,326
- No, thanks, Mom.
- I'm just... I'm not hungry.
- 112
- 00:06:01,357 --> 00:06:04,454
- What about a tuna salad sandwich
- or egg salad?
- 113
- 00:06:04,485 --> 00:06:07,447
- - You like egg salad.
- - I do like egg salad.
- 114
- 00:06:07,478 --> 00:06:13,349
- But, I promise you, I'll let you know,
- but I'm really not hungry right now.
- 115
- 00:06:13,380 --> 00:06:16,436
- Well, at least...
- at least Marcie is attractive.
- 116
- 00:06:16,467 --> 00:06:18,459
- - Mike!
- - Dad! My God!
- 117
- 00:06:18,490 --> 00:06:22,379
- What did I say? I mean,
- it'd be even worse if she was homely.
- 118
- 00:06:22,411 --> 00:06:24,527
- - No! No, it would not!
- - Yeah, OK, well, you know what?
- 119
- 00:06:24,559 --> 00:06:26,508
- That Dan, no good.
- 120
- 00:06:26,540 --> 00:06:30,377
- I knew that the first time he tried
- to make you drop out of college.
- 121
- 00:06:30,408 --> 00:06:35,392
- What kind of man makes his pregnant wife
- drop out of college with one year to go?
- 122
- 00:06:35,424 --> 00:06:37,415
- Mike, lower your voice.
- 123
- 00:06:37,447 --> 00:06:39,365
- You're upsetting Razzles.
- 124
- 00:06:39,396 --> 00:06:40,554
- I'm sorry, Razzy.
- 125
- 00:06:41,336 --> 00:06:43,390
- He didn't make me drop out of school.
- 126
- 00:06:43,421 --> 00:06:46,372
- Dan and I decided that together.
- We were having a baby!
- 127
- 00:06:46,403 --> 00:06:48,395
- We needed to save money.
- 128
- 00:06:48,426 --> 00:06:51,388
- We could only afford
- one of us to finish school
- 129
- 00:06:51,419 --> 00:06:53,536
- and he thought it was more important
- that he went.
- 130
- 00:06:53,568 --> 00:06:55,382
- - OK.
- - OK?
- 131
- 00:06:55,413 --> 00:06:57,561
- I was always supposed to go back.
- It just never happened.
- 132
- 00:06:57,593 --> 00:07:00,377
- You were just so close to graduating.
- 133
- 00:07:00,408 --> 00:07:02,483
- I think it just kind of
- sticks in his craw.
- 134
- 00:07:02,514 --> 00:07:05,580
- - Yeah, it just sticks in my craw a bit.
- - Yeah.
- 135
- 00:07:06,362 --> 00:07:08,385
- I've got an idea, honey.
- 136
- 00:07:08,604 --> 00:07:11,419
- What about a ham sandwich?
- 137
- 00:07:11,450 --> 00:07:14,380
- Sandy, she doesn't want a ham sandwich.
- 138
- 00:07:14,412 --> 00:07:15,548
- But she likes ham, Mike.
- 139
- 00:07:15,579 --> 00:07:18,603
- Of course she likes ham.
- Everybody likes ham!
- 140
- 00:07:19,385 --> 00:07:21,617
- But the point is
- that she's too upset to eat!
- 141
- 00:07:22,399 --> 00:07:25,402
- You know what's upsetting me?
- It's that my marriage has collapsed
- 142
- 00:07:25,433 --> 00:07:28,384
- and you two keep screaming about ham!
- 143
- 00:07:28,415 --> 00:07:31,419
- - I'm not screaming about ham.
- - You are screaming about ham!
- 144
- 00:07:31,450 --> 00:07:33,609
- - Yeah, stop it!
- - You think I'm screaming about ham?
- 145
- 00:07:34,391 --> 00:07:35,632
- Right now, your voice is going up
- with "ham"!
- 146
- 00:07:36,414 --> 00:07:38,551
- Fine! I'm screaming about ham!
- I can't help it!
- 147
- 00:07:38,582 --> 00:07:41,481
- I'm up on the roof there!
- I'm blowing through the roof!
- 148
- 00:07:41,513 --> 00:07:45,475
- I feel like... like I'm gonna blow
- like a hot water heater!
- 149
- 00:07:45,506 --> 00:07:47,425
- I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go right now.
- 150
- 00:07:47,456 --> 00:07:50,459
- I'm making everyone a sandwich.
- 151
- 00:07:51,648 --> 00:07:54,484
- Mom, am I the only one
- that didn't see it coming?
- 152
- 00:07:54,515 --> 00:07:56,621
- Yeah. I'm gonna shoot Dan.
- 153
- 00:07:56,653 --> 00:07:58,425
- - Mike.
- - Yeah!
- 154
- 00:07:58,457 --> 00:08:00,604
- Put the gun down.
- You are not shooting Dan.
- 155
- 00:08:00,637 --> 00:08:02,534
- Dad, stop waving that gun around.
- 156
- 00:08:02,566 --> 00:08:04,620
- I know exactly what I'm gonna do.
- 157
- 00:08:04,651 --> 00:08:07,571
- My gosh! You almost hit Razzles!
- 158
- 00:08:07,602 --> 00:08:09,594
- Michael, you put a hole in the stairs!
- 159
- 00:08:09,625 --> 00:08:11,585
- Shit!
- 160
- 00:08:11,616 --> 00:08:13,577
- You know what? Dan's fault!
- 161
- 00:08:13,608 --> 00:08:15,641
- This was Dan's fault.
- 162
- 00:08:23,618 --> 00:08:25,620
- You've Got Me Up Tight
- 163
- 00:08:26,611 --> 00:08:28,592
- ♪ You've got me up tight
- 164
- 00:08:28,623 --> 00:08:30,479
- ♪ Yeah
- 165
- 00:08:30,510 --> 00:08:32,492
- ♪ I blow my mind now over you
- 166
- 00:08:32,523 --> 00:08:34,525
- <i>♪ Up tight</i>
- 167
- 00:08:34,650 --> 00:08:37,570
- ♪ You've got me up tight
- 168
- 00:08:38,697 --> 00:08:40,688
- ♪ The way you do that thing you do
- 169
- 00:08:41,469 --> 00:08:43,472
- <i>♪ Up tight, yeah</i>
- 170
- 00:08:44,463 --> 00:08:47,674
- ♪ Well, I'm certain of what I said
- 171
- 00:08:47,706 --> 00:08:49,687
- ♪ You've got me out of my head
- 172
- 00:08:50,469 --> 00:08:52,471
- <i>♪ Up tight</i>
- 173
- 00:08:54,525 --> 00:08:56,506
- <i>♪ Up tight</i>
- 174
- 00:08:56,537 --> 00:08:58,477
- Shit!
- 175
- 00:08:58,508 --> 00:08:59,707
- <i>♪ Up tight</i>
- 176
- 00:09:02,606 --> 00:09:03,628
- <i>♪ Up tight</i>
- 177
- 00:09:07,517 --> 00:09:08,674
- <i>♪ Up tight</i>
- 178
- 00:09:10,593 --> 00:09:13,691
- ♪ Well, I'm certain of what I said...
- 179
- 00:09:19,582 --> 00:09:21,563
- Whoa! Whoa!
- 180
- 00:09:24,535 --> 00:09:26,600
- You can't call this racquetball.
- 181
- 00:09:26,631 --> 00:09:28,550
- That's a disgrace to the game.
- 182
- 00:09:28,685 --> 00:09:31,553
- You know what?
- I know I fought you on it
- 183
- 00:09:31,584 --> 00:09:33,721
- but thank you for getting me
- out of the house.
- 184
- 00:09:33,753 --> 00:09:35,755
- Come on. What do you
- think best friends are for?
- 185
- 00:09:36,537 --> 00:09:37,715
- Hey! Hey!
- 186
- 00:09:37,746 --> 00:09:40,582
- Excuse me,
- there's no alcohol on the courts.
- 187
- 00:09:40,624 --> 00:09:42,616
- Suck it, Eugene!
- 188
- 00:09:42,647 --> 00:09:43,731
- Go easy on the kid?
- 189
- 00:09:43,763 --> 00:09:45,733
- You know what?
- How many of those have you had?
- 190
- 00:09:45,766 --> 00:09:48,674
- - I had three on the way over here.
- - Yeah.
- 191
- 00:09:48,706 --> 00:09:50,656
- I made Frank drive me.
- 192
- 00:09:51,626 --> 00:09:54,629
- - You've had four here. You've had seven?
- - I've had seven.
- 193
- 00:09:54,660 --> 00:09:56,714
- What are we supposed to do,
- wait around here all day?
- 194
- 00:09:56,745 --> 00:10:00,635
- OK, let's just show them how it's done,
- OK?
- 195
- 00:10:03,554 --> 00:10:05,588
- - My God!
- - I'm sorry.
- 196
- 00:10:05,619 --> 00:10:07,569
- Right in the lady business.
- 197
- 00:10:07,652 --> 00:10:09,560
- It's not funny!
- 198
- 00:10:09,592 --> 00:10:11,562
- - Shut up!
- - It's not funny.
- 199
- 00:10:11,594 --> 00:10:15,556
- - My! That's like a pain.
- - I'm really sorry.
- 200
- 00:10:15,587 --> 00:10:20,623
- I think I was thinking about Dan's face
- or maybe... his crotchal area.
- 201
- 00:10:20,655 --> 00:10:22,615
- - No, but you're good.
- - I kind of let loose.
- 202
- 00:10:22,646 --> 00:10:23,805
- You got good aim. Wow!
- 203
- 00:10:24,586 --> 00:10:26,651
- What am I doing? I am drinking alcohol
- 204
- 00:10:26,683 --> 00:10:28,737
- on a racquetball court
- and yelling at old men.
- 205
- 00:10:28,768 --> 00:10:30,582
- I mean, what am I gonna do?
- 206
- 00:10:30,614 --> 00:10:33,762
- Go get a studio apartment
- or start taking spin classes?
- 207
- 00:10:33,794 --> 00:10:36,630
- God! I don't wanna start a blog.
- 208
- 00:10:36,661 --> 00:10:39,612
- - I don't know how to do that.
- - Please don't do that.
- 209
- 00:10:42,688 --> 00:10:44,815
- I should have just fought more.
- 210
- 00:10:45,597 --> 00:10:47,724
- - You know?
- - Don't do that to yourself.
- 211
- 00:10:47,756 --> 00:10:49,716
- You did great.
- 212
- 00:10:49,747 --> 00:10:51,666
- What about Maddie?
- 213
- 00:10:52,761 --> 00:10:54,794
- - She's so great.
- - She's so great.
- 214
- 00:10:54,825 --> 00:10:57,776
- I don't regret that at all, I mean...
- 215
- 00:10:57,808 --> 00:10:59,810
- That's the best, I mean, being her mom.
- 216
- 00:10:59,842 --> 00:11:01,833
- I even liked being a wife.
- 217
- 00:11:02,614 --> 00:11:04,628
- I just wanted to also have a career.
- 218
- 00:11:04,659 --> 00:11:07,631
- I didn't see why I couldn't
- have all of those things.
- 219
- 00:11:07,787 --> 00:11:11,739
- Hey, yo! We don't have time
- for your heartfelt conversations!
- 220
- 00:11:12,636 --> 00:11:13,835
- They're so ornery.
- 221
- 00:11:14,617 --> 00:11:16,765
- OK, let's razzle-dazzle, and show...
- 222
- 00:11:16,796 --> 00:11:19,862
- - God, we have to move again?
- - ..show the Muppet judges, right?
- 223
- 00:11:20,644 --> 00:11:22,698
- My sciatica's kicking.
- 224
- 00:11:22,729 --> 00:11:24,742
- God! Wow!
- 225
- 00:11:24,773 --> 00:11:26,869
- The pain, it's blinding!
- 226
- 00:11:27,651 --> 00:11:29,872
- I'm so sorry... I'm so sorry I did that.
- I didn't mean to hit you.
- 227
- 00:11:30,654 --> 00:11:33,751
- You don't need to apologise to me.
- Just apologise to my vagina.
- 228
- 00:11:35,742 --> 00:11:37,776
- I'm so sorry.
- 229
- 00:11:37,808 --> 00:11:39,663
- Stacey accepts your apology.
- 230
- 00:11:39,695 --> 00:11:41,749
- - Who's Stacey?
- - She's my vagina.
- 231
- 00:11:41,780 --> 00:11:44,752
- You know what? I shouldn't say anything.
- Mine is LeVonne.
- 232
- 00:11:44,783 --> 00:11:47,766
- - What?
- - I thought it sounded French.
- 233
- 00:11:52,896 --> 00:11:54,835
- My God.
- 234
- 00:11:56,743 --> 00:11:57,848
- Ho!
- 235
- 00:12:04,751 --> 00:12:06,774
- That was not good hair.
- 236
- 00:12:07,702 --> 00:12:09,914
- Too short. Too short, Deanna.
- 237
- 00:12:35,700 --> 00:12:36,774
- A-boo!
- 238
- 00:12:36,805 --> 00:12:38,797
- - God!
- - Mom!
- 239
- 00:12:38,828 --> 00:12:41,821
- I'm so sorry.
- I didn't mean to actually scare you.
- 240
- 00:12:41,852 --> 00:12:43,770
- - Hi!
- - Surprise!
- 241
- 00:12:43,802 --> 00:12:45,752
- What are you doing here?
- 242
- 00:12:45,783 --> 00:12:48,954
- Well, I was just bringing you
- some mini toiletries
- 243
- 00:12:49,735 --> 00:12:52,749
- and I got you some more of that shampoo
- that I know you like so much.
- 244
- 00:12:52,780 --> 00:12:55,752
- Mom, I've only been here a week.
- I don't need more shampoo.
- 245
- 00:12:55,783 --> 00:12:58,932
- I always think everyone
- can use shampoo
- 246
- 00:12:58,964 --> 00:13:02,811
- and floss and frozen vegetable medleys.
- 247
- 00:13:02,843 --> 00:13:04,845
- Always a good thing to have around.
- 248
- 00:13:04,876 --> 00:13:08,807
- That's why I stopped by
- and also to tell you that
- 249
- 00:13:08,838 --> 00:13:10,934
- your father and I are getting a divorce.
- 250
- 00:13:10,965 --> 00:13:13,770
- But if you want me
- to take the shampoo back...
- 251
- 00:13:13,801 --> 00:13:14,927
- Wait, what?
- 252
- 00:13:15,981 --> 00:13:17,899
- Yeah, honey.
- 253
- 00:13:19,922 --> 00:13:22,748
- I'm sorry, I didn't mean
- to just blurt that out.
- 254
- 00:13:22,779 --> 00:13:23,854
- I'm sorry.
- 255
- 00:13:23,885 --> 00:13:25,782
- - My God!
- - Come here.
- 256
- 00:13:26,993 --> 00:13:29,798
- I didn't mean to do it like that.
- 257
- 00:13:29,829 --> 00:13:32,988
- You know that this has nothing to do
- with how much we love you.
- 258
- 00:13:33,770 --> 00:13:37,795
- Because we love you.
- We love you so much. So much, OK?
- 259
- 00:13:38,796 --> 00:13:39,901
- My God.
- 260
- 00:13:40,923 --> 00:13:42,008
- What happened?
- 261
- 00:13:42,790 --> 00:13:44,854
- I guess in a nutshell, I would have to say
- 262
- 00:13:44,886 --> 00:13:48,827
- that he is currently
- having an intimate sexual relationship
- 263
- 00:13:48,858 --> 00:13:50,016
- with somebody named Marcie.
- 264
- 00:13:50,798 --> 00:13:51,986
- I'm so sorry, Mom.
- 265
- 00:13:52,018 --> 00:13:54,864
- No, I'm... I'm sorry.
- 266
- 00:13:54,896 --> 00:13:55,969
- I mean, this was not my plan.
- 267
- 00:13:56,002 --> 00:14:01,904
- I did not mean to come over here
- and just dump bad news on you.
- 268
- 00:14:01,935 --> 00:14:03,885
- I wish I was...
- 269
- 00:14:03,916 --> 00:14:05,866
- I wish I knew how to do this better.
- 270
- 00:14:05,897 --> 00:14:07,034
- Dad is such an ass!
- 271
- 00:14:07,816 --> 00:14:09,818
- Yeah. But I'll tell you this.
- 272
- 00:14:09,849 --> 00:14:13,040
- I'm not even really a full week in
- but I'm feeling...
- 273
- 00:14:14,833 --> 00:14:15,918
- ..peppier about it.
- 274
- 00:14:15,949 --> 00:14:17,044
- Top of the week was... Whoo!
- 275
- 00:14:17,826 --> 00:14:20,933
- ..really, really spiralling down there
- but I feel like
- 276
- 00:14:20,964 --> 00:14:23,946
- there's some big wheels in motion here.
- 277
- 00:14:23,978 --> 00:14:27,867
- Exciting, big, semi-truck-size wheels.
- 278
- 00:14:27,898 --> 00:14:29,859
- Yes, big wheels!
- 279
- 00:14:29,890 --> 00:14:32,028
- Come on, seize the day! Go for the gold!
- 280
- 00:14:32,060 --> 00:14:34,990
- Yeah, at least medal, right?
- 281
- 00:14:35,021 --> 00:14:38,921
- That's why I'm gonna go back to college
- and get my archaeology degree.
- 282
- 00:14:38,952 --> 00:14:40,985
- Right here, my alma mater.
- 283
- 00:14:41,016 --> 00:14:43,050
- I'm gonna finish what I started!
- 284
- 00:14:43,832 --> 00:14:44,927
- - No.
- - Yes!
- 285
- 00:14:44,958 --> 00:14:47,940
- Mom, you really gotta take a moment
- and think about this.
- 286
- 00:14:48,910 --> 00:14:51,913
- I love it.
- 287
- 00:14:51,944 --> 00:14:54,905
- OK. Boy.
- 288
- 00:14:56,918 --> 00:14:58,013
- Boy.
- 289
- 00:14:58,044 --> 00:15:00,891
- I overwhelmed my gal.
- 290
- 00:15:00,922 --> 00:15:02,955
- Mom came in and overwhelmed her.
- 291
- 00:15:02,986 --> 00:15:04,029
- Yes, I did.
- 292
- 00:15:04,060 --> 00:15:07,096
- No, this is... this is good news.
- 293
- 00:15:07,877 --> 00:15:09,900
- Yeah, good news..
- 294
- 00:15:09,931 --> 00:15:11,068
- Good news.
- 295
- 00:15:11,976 --> 00:15:14,979
- I'll tell you what. I would hate
- to have to clean all these spindles.
- 296
- 00:15:15,010 --> 00:15:17,106
- - I think you could do it.
- - I know I could.
- 297
- 00:15:18,034 --> 00:15:19,869
- You doing OK?
- 298
- 00:15:19,900 --> 00:15:21,892
- - Yeah, I'll be OK.
- - OK. I know.
- 299
- 00:15:21,923 --> 00:15:23,967
- Yeah, you're a tough cookie.
- 300
- 00:15:26,052 --> 00:15:28,023
- Hey! Hello!
- 301
- 00:15:28,054 --> 00:15:30,056
- Look who's here. The gang's all here.
- 302
- 00:15:30,087 --> 00:15:32,882
- - Hi!
- - Hi, Mrs Miles!
- 303
- 00:15:32,913 --> 00:15:35,885
- Look at this. It's a study group.
- Study buddies already.
- 304
- 00:15:35,916 --> 00:15:38,012
- - You should be down here studying.
- - Please stop, Mom.
- 305
- 00:15:38,127 --> 00:15:41,067
- Look at you.
- Boy, a sight for sore eyes?
- 306
- 00:15:41,098 --> 00:15:44,967
- Hello to my fellow Tigers,
- fellow students,
- 307
- 00:15:44,998 --> 00:15:48,898
- because somebody's mom
- just enrolled in college!
- 308
- 00:15:48,930 --> 00:15:50,995
- I'm referring to myself.
- 309
- 00:15:51,026 --> 00:15:52,955
- Wait, you're going to school here now?
- 310
- 00:15:52,986 --> 00:15:55,113
- She's thinking about it.
- It's not for sure yet.
- 311
- 00:15:55,145 --> 00:15:58,116
- It's pretty for sure.
- I don't think I'm gonna change my mind.
- 312
- 00:15:58,148 --> 00:16:02,120
- And, you know, it made me start wondering
- when I was signing up today.
- 313
- 00:16:02,152 --> 00:16:07,021
- I thought, "Wasn't Amanda talking about
- switching to the archaeology department?"
- 314
- 00:16:07,052 --> 00:16:09,982
- - Was that you?
- - No, I'm art history.
- 315
- 00:16:10,014 --> 00:16:11,161
- No. How about you?
- 316
- 00:16:11,943 --> 00:16:12,985
- No, it's not me.
- 317
- 00:16:13,017 --> 00:16:16,927
- No. I'm so sorry, we haven't met.
- I haven't had the pleasure.
- 318
- 00:16:16,958 --> 00:16:18,991
- - I'm Helen. Hi!
- - Did I get lucky?
- 319
- 00:16:19,023 --> 00:16:22,954
- Are you possibly an archaeology major?
- There's usually two of us in a room.
- 320
- 00:16:22,985 --> 00:16:24,164
- I'm undeclared.
- 321
- 00:16:24,946 --> 00:16:26,156
- There's still time.
- 322
- 00:16:26,938 --> 00:16:28,074
- There's still time. Check into it.
- 323
- 00:16:28,106 --> 00:16:30,984
- Now, I couldn't help noticing
- 324
- 00:16:31,015 --> 00:16:33,173
- that you're a little whisper older
- than the other girls.
- 325
- 00:16:33,955 --> 00:16:36,103
- Are you a TA or maybe a grad student?
- 326
- 00:16:36,134 --> 00:16:39,148
- No, I'm a sophomore.
- But I started college a little bit later
- 327
- 00:16:39,179 --> 00:16:41,108
- because I was in a coma for eight years.
- 328
- 00:16:41,139 --> 00:16:43,027
- My gosh!
- 329
- 00:16:43,058 --> 00:16:46,989
- If I may, I'm just wondering,
- how did it... how did that happen?
- 330
- 00:16:47,020 --> 00:16:48,167
- Yes, I was skydiving.
- 331
- 00:16:48,199 --> 00:16:50,003
- Boy!
- 332
- 00:16:50,034 --> 00:16:52,171
- One minute you're falling out of
- a plane, then the lights go out.
- 333
- 00:16:52,204 --> 00:16:54,987
- Next thing I know, I wake up.
- I think it's the next day
- 334
- 00:16:55,018 --> 00:16:57,209
- but I've grown four inches
- and suddenly I have C cups.
- 335
- 00:16:57,990 --> 00:16:59,106
- It was eight years gone.
- 336
- 00:16:59,138 --> 00:17:02,130
- I also have C cups. But I didn't have
- to go into a coma for them.
- 337
- 00:17:02,161 --> 00:17:05,039
- Mom! I think that's your cue.
- 338
- 00:17:05,071 --> 00:17:07,114
- I think, maybe, you've gotta hit the road.
- 339
- 00:17:07,146 --> 00:17:09,158
- - Yes, I'm sorry.
- - Yeah.
- 340
- 00:17:09,189 --> 00:17:13,214
- Yes. Put a fork in me. I'm done. So sorry.
- 341
- 00:17:13,996 --> 00:17:16,061
- I'm gonna toddle off, on that note.
- 342
- 00:17:16,092 --> 00:17:17,145
- So nice meeting you.
- 343
- 00:17:17,176 --> 00:17:21,055
- So nice to meet you, Helen.
- Girls, what a delight to see you again.
- 344
- 00:17:21,087 --> 00:17:23,162
- OK, all right.
- 345
- 00:17:23,193 --> 00:17:27,093
- Well, I'll see you around campus
- or on the quad.
- 346
- 00:17:27,124 --> 00:17:29,105
- - Nobody says that, Mom.
- - Nobody says that?
- 347
- 00:17:29,136 --> 00:17:31,223
- I'll bring it back.
- See you in the quad, Tigers.
- 348
- 00:17:32,004 --> 00:17:33,100
- Bye, Mrs Miles!
- 349
- 00:17:33,131 --> 00:17:35,123
- And welcome.
- 350
- 00:17:36,769 --> 00:17:38,906
- Sugar Dyed
- 351
- 00:17:40,962 --> 00:17:43,755
- So, here's your class schedule.
- 352
- 00:17:43,786 --> 00:17:45,862
- Wow! I am pumped!
- 353
- 00:17:45,894 --> 00:17:47,969
- - Thank you so much!
- - You're so welcome.
- 354
- 00:17:49,752 --> 00:17:51,837
- - All right, take care.
- - Bye now.
- 355
- 00:17:51,868 --> 00:17:54,788
- I already got senioritis. Kidding!
- 356
- 00:17:55,768 --> 00:17:56,811
- Yes!
- 357
- 00:17:56,967 --> 00:17:58,969
- ♪ Ain't nobody, ain't nobody
- 358
- 00:18:00,888 --> 00:18:02,963
- ♪ Gonna steal my brand-new groove
- 359
- 00:18:03,745 --> 00:18:05,789
- Ooh! Yes!
- 360
- 00:18:07,895 --> 00:18:09,991
- ♪ I'm about to lose my cool
- 361
- 00:18:11,909 --> 00:18:13,911
- ♪ I need you, babe
- 362
- 00:18:16,905 --> 00:18:19,929
- Did you see these in there?
- They're tiny footballs!
- 363
- 00:18:19,960 --> 00:18:22,942
- - Aren't they so cute?
- - No idea what I'm gonna do with them.
- 364
- 00:18:22,973 --> 00:18:26,884
- I guess I'll find tiny football players.
- 365
- 00:18:29,907 --> 00:18:32,806
- Let me just get my grip.
- 366
- 00:18:33,828 --> 00:18:34,985
- You're a sight for sore eyes.
- 367
- 00:18:35,017 --> 00:18:37,863
- If you could just maybe grab that...
- 368
- 00:18:38,885 --> 00:18:40,877
- I guess chivalry's dead.
- 369
- 00:18:40,908 --> 00:18:43,817
- Wearing sweatpants in broad daylight.
- 370
- 00:18:43,848 --> 00:18:45,788
- There's another one.
- 371
- 00:18:45,819 --> 00:18:47,998
- Future Dans of America.
- 372
- 00:18:52,805 --> 00:18:53,912
- Hello?
- 373
- 00:18:54,849 --> 00:18:56,809
- Hi!...
- 374
- 00:19:03,025 --> 00:19:05,006
- Don't turn on the lights.
- 375
- 00:19:07,873 --> 00:19:09,823
- Hi, there.
- 376
- 00:19:10,053 --> 00:19:15,026
- I'm Deanna
- and you must be Lenore or is it Leonor?
- 377
- 00:19:18,978 --> 00:19:21,919
- OK, well, I'm sure we'll get into that.
- 378
- 00:19:22,941 --> 00:19:24,880
- So we're roomies?
- 379
- 00:19:25,026 --> 00:19:27,018
- Fun to be roomies.
- 380
- 00:19:27,050 --> 00:19:28,926
- Bunkmates.
- 381
- 00:19:30,886 --> 00:19:33,014
- It's dark in here. Were you asleep?
- 382
- 00:19:33,045 --> 00:19:35,902
- I don't sleep. I'm scared of the dark.
- 383
- 00:19:35,934 --> 00:19:37,988
- Boy.
- 384
- 00:19:38,019 --> 00:19:42,044
- I'm scared of a lot of things.
- I'm scared of crowds, books, flying,
- 385
- 00:19:42,075 --> 00:19:44,964
- people, ants, ketchup.
- 386
- 00:19:44,995 --> 00:19:46,934
- Ketchup's a tough one for me.
- 387
- 00:19:46,966 --> 00:19:52,023
- I mean, I like a moutarde
- but I'm kind of a ketchup gal.
- 388
- 00:19:52,054 --> 00:19:54,045
- I like to dunk my taters.
- 389
- 00:19:54,077 --> 00:19:56,047
- OK. I like that.
- 390
- 00:19:56,923 --> 00:20:00,051
- OK, well, we are gonna get along
- just great.
- 391
- 00:20:01,981 --> 00:20:03,962
- Look at that spring back.
- 392
- 00:20:03,993 --> 00:20:07,904
- I'll tell you what,
- I did not expect that kind of resilience.
- 393
- 00:20:15,099 --> 00:20:17,977
- First day at school!
- 394
- 00:20:18,008 --> 00:20:19,092
- Shut up!
- - Sorry.
- 395
- 00:20:19,124 --> 00:20:21,011
- First day at school.
- 396
- 00:20:21,939 --> 00:20:24,973
- Hey, guys. Go Tigers, right?
- 397
- 00:20:25,098 --> 00:20:27,027
- Man.
- 398
- 00:20:27,059 --> 00:20:29,092
- I want it. Yes!
- 399
- 00:20:29,123 --> 00:20:32,095
- I'd love a brainstorming session,
- I've got one.
- 400
- 00:20:32,126 --> 00:20:34,086
- Hit it high! There we go.
- 401
- 00:20:34,952 --> 00:20:36,036
- Hey, Mondays?
- 402
- 00:20:37,965 --> 00:20:40,073
- This is amazing!
- 403
- 00:20:55,056 --> 00:20:58,018
- OK. Let's do this.
- 404
- 00:20:58,049 --> 00:21:00,061
- Good seats. Good pick.
- 405
- 00:21:00,093 --> 00:21:03,033
- I'm gonna go a little further up
- because of my progressives.
- 406
- 00:21:03,064 --> 00:21:05,953
- You want a study buddy?
- I'll give you my landline.
- 407
- 00:21:05,984 --> 00:21:08,038
- Maybe we could kind of...!
- 408
- 00:21:08,069 --> 00:21:09,164
- - Hi!
- - Hi!
- 409
- 00:21:09,998 --> 00:21:13,001
- I hate to do this.
- God, there's always that one, right?
- 410
- 00:21:13,033 --> 00:21:15,035
- It's, like, "I gotta sit
- in the centre-centre."
- 411
- 00:21:15,066 --> 00:21:17,986
- Ooh, look at you. Real big feet.
- 412
- 00:21:19,061 --> 00:21:21,188
- Sorry, let me give you that back.
- You got it.
- 413
- 00:21:21,970 --> 00:21:23,044
- - Hi!
- - Hi.
- 414
- 00:21:23,075 --> 00:21:25,077
- Hi, there. God, I'm sorry.
- 415
- 00:21:25,108 --> 00:21:27,048
- Sorry. I apologise.
- 416
- 00:21:27,079 --> 00:21:30,051
- You got hit by school spirit.
- 417
- 00:21:30,082 --> 00:21:33,137
- Wow! Look at you, all decked out.
- 418
- 00:21:33,168 --> 00:21:36,088
- You know what?
- I am excited to be in this class.
- 419
- 00:21:36,119 --> 00:21:39,133
- Now, I have to say,
- I'm surprised to see you in here.
- 420
- 00:21:39,164 --> 00:21:43,053
- Well, after I met you,
- I watched Indiana Jones.
- 421
- 00:21:43,085 --> 00:21:44,993
- The best.
- 422
- 00:21:45,024 --> 00:21:48,017
- - Then, scuttlebutt on the street is...
- - What is that?
- 423
- 00:21:48,048 --> 00:21:51,020
- Everything's already been dug up,
- so this is a really easy class.
- 424
- 00:21:51,051 --> 00:21:52,167
- No, I gotta agree to disagree.
- 425
- 00:21:52,199 --> 00:21:55,170
- But good news,
- this means we're both Jurassic junkies.
- 426
- 00:21:57,214 --> 00:21:59,164
- Look at this place..
- 427
- 00:21:59,195 --> 00:22:01,072
- Boy.
- 428
- 00:22:03,001 --> 00:22:06,025
- Excuse me, I think your bag's got
- a case of the dropsies.
- 429
- 00:22:06,056 --> 00:22:08,142
- It went through the chute there.
- 430
- 00:22:08,173 --> 00:22:12,135
- Farther in than I thought.
- You know what?
- 431
- 00:22:12,167 --> 00:22:13,168
- That tip.
- 432
- 00:22:13,199 --> 00:22:15,232
- The little tip of that cracked right off.
- 433
- 00:22:16,014 --> 00:22:19,080
- But, luckily for you, I got a whole
- haul of mechanical pencils
- 434
- 00:22:19,111 --> 00:22:21,144
- so the lead keeps replenishing
- as you twist.
- 435
- 00:22:21,176 --> 00:22:23,241
- You want in on this?
- 436
- 00:22:24,022 --> 00:22:26,066
- - No, thank you.
- - No?
- 437
- 00:22:26,171 --> 00:22:28,142
- But I love your sweater.
- 438
- 00:22:30,102 --> 00:22:33,053
- Thank you so much.
- Yeah, I thought it really popped.
- 439
- 00:22:33,084 --> 00:22:34,263
- Yeah, I was kidding.
- 440
- 00:22:35,045 --> 00:22:36,181
- It's a horrible sweater.
- 441
- 00:22:36,212 --> 00:22:39,184
- It's a horrible, super-sad mom sweater.
- 442
- 00:22:43,147 --> 00:22:45,055
- OK.
- 443
- 00:22:45,086 --> 00:22:46,202
- I see we're still doing that.
- 444
- 00:22:46,233 --> 00:22:50,091
- Girls being mean to other girls
- for no apparent reason.
- 445
- 00:22:50,122 --> 00:22:55,096
- There is a reason. You're not a girl,
- you're 1,000 years old.
- 446
- 00:22:55,127 --> 00:22:57,286
- You're ancient. A relic.
- 447
- 00:22:58,172 --> 00:23:00,195
- She's pleased with herself over that one.
- 448
- 00:23:00,227 --> 00:23:05,086
- Well, guess what? If I'm a relic,
- then I guess I'm in the right class.
- 449
- 00:23:05,117 --> 00:23:07,099
- Whoo!
- 450
- 00:23:07,130 --> 00:23:08,245
- Swoosh.
- 451
- 00:23:08,277 --> 00:23:10,237
- It's an archaeology jam.
- 452
- 00:23:10,268 --> 00:23:14,210
- Who made jam out of that mess of berries?
- Me.
- 453
- 00:23:14,241 --> 00:23:16,160
- Good afternoon, everyone.
- 454
- 00:23:16,191 --> 00:23:20,132
- Welcome to Archaeology 301.
- 455
- 00:23:21,154 --> 00:23:22,187
- My God.
- 456
- 00:23:22,218 --> 00:23:24,282
- I think that's Wayne Truzack.
- 457
- 00:23:24,314 --> 00:23:27,254
- He was a classmate of mine 20 years ago.
- 458
- 00:23:27,285 --> 00:23:32,238
- First of all, I wanna tell you that your
- satisfaction in this class is guaranteed
- 459
- 00:23:32,269 --> 00:23:35,179
- or you'll get double your mummy back.
- 460
- 00:23:40,268 --> 00:23:42,166
- "Mummy back."
- 461
- 00:23:42,197 --> 00:23:44,272
- I don't get why that's funny.
- 462
- 00:23:44,303 --> 00:23:47,265
- It is funny but it's also punny.
- 463
- 00:23:48,234 --> 00:23:51,112
- Hey, freaks, shut up!
- 464
- 00:24:00,173 --> 00:24:01,299
- No! No! No!
- 465
- 00:24:08,234 --> 00:24:10,131
- No. No. No.
- 466
- 00:24:19,162 --> 00:24:21,164
- I brought snacks!
- 467
- 00:24:24,157 --> 00:24:27,139
- I don't know. I'm loving my classes.
- 468
- 00:24:27,170 --> 00:24:29,339
- They're amazing. I feel like I'm learning.
- 469
- 00:24:29,370 --> 00:24:32,196
- I think I felt for so long like
- my brain was in a freezer
- 470
- 00:24:32,227 --> 00:24:34,250
- and now I've really come room temp.
- 471
- 00:24:34,281 --> 00:24:35,366
- It's just great!
- 472
- 00:24:36,148 --> 00:24:38,358
- - Can I say something?
- - You could say whatever you want, Debbie.
- 473
- 00:24:38,390 --> 00:24:41,351
- - You don't have to ask.
- - Thanks, Amanda.
- 474
- 00:24:41,382 --> 00:24:44,302
- I think it's really great
- you had something bad happen to you
- 475
- 00:24:44,333 --> 00:24:46,399
- and that you're making lemons
- out of lemonade.
- 476
- 00:24:47,305 --> 00:24:51,216
- I think you did kind of flip-flop
- that saying.
- 477
- 00:24:51,247 --> 00:24:53,228
- It's supposed to be
- "lemonade out of lemons".
- 478
- 00:24:53,260 --> 00:24:56,356
- You take something sour
- and you turn it into something sweet.
- 479
- 00:24:56,388 --> 00:24:59,287
- Pretty sure it's
- "make lemons out of lemonade".
- 480
- 00:24:59,318 --> 00:25:02,196
- It's kind of the idea that
- something bad happened to you,
- 481
- 00:25:02,227 --> 00:25:06,210
- like your husband leaving you
- and squashing you to make lemonade.
- 482
- 00:25:06,241 --> 00:25:09,349
- Then pulling yourself back together again
- and now you're a whole lemon.
- 483
- 00:25:09,380 --> 00:25:13,280
- That was a very visual story.
- 484
- 00:25:13,311 --> 00:25:15,355
- Very painful visual
- 485
- 00:25:15,386 --> 00:25:20,297
- but then the whole lemon really does
- bring it back around to the flip side.
- 486
- 00:25:20,328 --> 00:25:21,403
- So thank you for that.
- 487
- 00:25:21,435 --> 00:25:25,260
- I appreciate the sentiment
- and I appreciate these cheeks.
- 488
- 00:25:25,293 --> 00:25:28,244
- My God! I can't let go!
- 489
- 00:25:28,275 --> 00:25:30,266
- Deanna, you wanna stick around
- and hang out?
- 490
- 00:25:30,298 --> 00:25:33,415
- I would love to hang.
- My first college hang.
- 491
- 00:25:33,447 --> 00:25:37,211
- I am free as a bird. I'm down to clown.
- 492
- 00:25:37,242 --> 00:25:39,265
- Deanna's such a mouthful.
- 493
- 00:25:39,296 --> 00:25:40,422
- What if I called you Dee Dee?
- 494
- 00:25:41,277 --> 00:25:43,238
- I have always wanted a nickname.
- 495
- 00:25:43,269 --> 00:25:45,313
- What about Dee Rock or Dee Train?
- 496
- 00:25:45,344 --> 00:25:46,387
- Or Glenn?
- 497
- 00:25:46,418 --> 00:25:48,295
- Why would we call her Glenn?
- 498
- 00:25:48,326 --> 00:25:52,341
- Just cos I love Glenn Close
- and I was thinking about her.
- 499
- 00:25:52,372 --> 00:25:54,447
- - I love Glenn Close.
- - You do?
- 500
- 00:25:55,229 --> 00:25:56,365
- Fatal Attraction, best movie ever.
- 501
- 00:25:56,397 --> 00:25:58,452
- - That the one where she boiled a rabbit?
- - It is.
- 502
- 00:25:59,233 --> 00:26:02,267
- I think I showed that to Maddie
- a little too early on
- 503
- 00:26:02,299 --> 00:26:04,395
- because she urinated in her underpants.
- 504
- 00:26:04,426 --> 00:26:05,427
- Mom!
- 505
- 00:26:05,459 --> 00:26:09,484
- And would not eat anything out of a stew
- pot for a good six to eight months.
- 506
- 00:26:10,266 --> 00:26:14,311
- Or she would just keep re-urinating
- in her underpants.
- 507
- 00:26:14,343 --> 00:26:15,365
- Mom, stop!
- 508
- 00:26:15,396 --> 00:26:18,263
- Let's watch it.
- Let's rent it. Movie night.
- 509
- 00:26:18,295 --> 00:26:21,277
- Yeah, you know...
- I love a good movie night.
- 510
- 00:26:21,308 --> 00:26:25,281
- But I think...
- my mom does not want to hang out here.
- 511
- 00:26:25,312 --> 00:26:29,264
- She's just stopping by. She's not gonna
- hang out with her daughter's friends.
- 512
- 00:26:29,295 --> 00:26:31,507
- That would be so weird.
- That would be weird.
- 513
- 00:26:33,278 --> 00:26:36,397
- Maddie's right.
- I can't hang out right now.
- 514
- 00:26:36,428 --> 00:26:40,349
- I've gotta get home and get in some
- good hang time with my new roomie.
- 515
- 00:26:40,380 --> 00:26:43,414
- - What's her name?
- - You know what? It's Leonor or Lenore.
- 516
- 00:26:43,446 --> 00:26:44,457
- I'm not really sure.
- 517
- 00:26:44,488 --> 00:26:47,502
- We're just kind of getting used
- to each other, I'm sure.
- 518
- 00:26:48,284 --> 00:26:50,463
- She kind of mutters around the room,
- talking to herself.
- 519
- 00:26:50,494 --> 00:26:54,373
- I just kind of get a Voldemort vibe
- from her.
- 520
- 00:26:54,405 --> 00:26:58,294
- But I will take a rain check on the movie,
- if that... Or not.
- 521
- 00:26:58,450 --> 00:27:00,379
- - Rain check.
- - OK. Rain check.
- 522
- 00:27:00,411 --> 00:27:01,432
- Aw!
- 523
- 00:27:01,464 --> 00:27:04,425
- I'll make the popcorn.
- I got a sweet and savoury one.
- 524
- 00:27:04,456 --> 00:27:05,488
- - Great!
- - Bye.
- 525
- 00:27:05,520 --> 00:27:07,324
- - Bye, Mom.
- - Bye, Dee Rock.
- 526
- 00:27:07,355 --> 00:27:08,471
- - She's amazing.
- - Yeah.
- 527
- 00:27:08,503 --> 00:27:12,392
- That was very nice of her
- to bring food for you guys.
- 528
- 00:27:12,424 --> 00:27:14,405
- I love your mom.
- 529
- 00:27:14,436 --> 00:27:17,501
- Last thing. You're not gonna...
- Thunder dunder clouds up ahead.
- 530
- 00:27:17,533 --> 00:27:20,484
- And I just said rain check.
- It's like I conjured it.
- 531
- 00:27:20,515 --> 00:27:24,404
- - Great.
- - OK. Bye-bye. Last hug.
- 532
- 00:27:24,436 --> 00:27:25,457
- - OK.
- - I love you.
- 533
- 00:27:25,489 --> 00:27:27,376
- Look at her dancing me out!
- 534
- 00:27:27,407 --> 00:27:29,347
- We're like Fred and... OK.
- 535
- 00:27:35,457 --> 00:27:37,417
- You're a bookworm?
- 536
- 00:27:39,357 --> 00:27:41,515
- My God. How long have you been there?
- 537
- 00:27:41,546 --> 00:27:43,413
- Six minutes.
- 538
- 00:27:47,532 --> 00:27:49,566
- You're a quiet one.
- 539
- 00:27:50,347 --> 00:27:51,484
- You get good grades?
- 540
- 00:27:51,516 --> 00:27:53,403
- ...well...
- 541
- 00:27:53,434 --> 00:27:57,376
- I try. I really enjoy
- the subject matter and...
- 542
- 00:27:57,407 --> 00:28:00,420
- I don't know,
- I just find archaeology a constant wonder.
- 543
- 00:28:00,452 --> 00:28:03,455
- You like to dig up stuff?
- I like to bury stuff.
- 544
- 00:28:03,486 --> 00:28:05,363
- OK.
- 545
- 00:28:05,394 --> 00:28:07,594
- Look at us! Kind of yin and yang...
- 546
- 00:28:08,376 --> 00:28:10,608
- having our first conversation?
- 547
- 00:28:11,390 --> 00:28:12,464
- Fun.
- 548
- 00:28:12,495 --> 00:28:16,551
- Listen, while we're gabbing,
- I was just kind of wondering...
- 549
- 00:28:16,582 --> 00:28:19,439
- It's been a few weeks.
- 550
- 00:28:19,471 --> 00:28:21,588
- I'm thinking, "I wonder if she's ever
- gonna go...
- 551
- 00:28:21,620 --> 00:28:24,392
- outside the room?"
- 552
- 00:28:24,424 --> 00:28:27,521
- Maybe for a class or a...
- you know, a coven meeting.
- 553
- 00:28:28,470 --> 00:28:29,513
- I'm kidding.
- 554
- 00:28:29,544 --> 00:28:31,546
- I've gone on the other side of that door.
- 555
- 00:28:31,577 --> 00:28:32,589
- Yeah...
- 556
- 00:28:32,620 --> 00:28:35,571
- I find you behind that door all the time
- 557
- 00:28:35,602 --> 00:28:38,397
- but that's inside my closet.
- 558
- 00:28:38,428 --> 00:28:40,451
- So, I was just wondering...
- 559
- 00:28:40,482 --> 00:28:45,519
- are you ever gonna go out of maybe
- that door... into the, let's say, hallway?
- 560
- 00:28:45,644 --> 00:28:48,407
- I'll probably stick to that door.
- 561
- 00:28:48,438 --> 00:28:50,419
- - You wanna stick to my closet?
- - Yeah.
- 562
- 00:28:50,451 --> 00:28:51,566
- OK.
- 563
- 00:28:52,588 --> 00:28:54,590
- I like you.
- 564
- 00:28:57,437 --> 00:28:58,564
- And we're friends.
- 565
- 00:28:58,595 --> 00:29:00,440
- I certainly hope so.
- 566
- 00:29:00,472 --> 00:29:01,629
- I'm might go back to my room.
- 567
- 00:29:03,548 --> 00:29:04,601
- OK.
- 568
- 00:29:11,608 --> 00:29:14,486
- Wow! That smells great. What is that?
- 569
- 00:29:14,517 --> 00:29:16,644
- Yes, it's Fiori Antichi Della Novella.
- 570
- 00:29:16,676 --> 00:29:18,667
- Remember? We got it a Firenze.
- 571
- 00:29:19,449 --> 00:29:20,669
- Mi piace.
- 572
- 00:29:21,451 --> 00:29:22,619
- - It turns me on.
- - Yeah.
- 573
- 00:29:28,448 --> 00:29:29,626
- What is that smell?
- 574
- 00:29:30,533 --> 00:29:33,515
- It's probably garlic and Dial.
- 575
- 00:29:33,547 --> 00:29:35,486
- And a little mayo.
- 576
- 00:29:35,518 --> 00:29:37,500
- I had an Italian sandwich.
- 577
- 00:29:37,531 --> 00:29:38,688
- They're lovers.
- 578
- 00:29:39,470 --> 00:29:40,628
- No, they're not. They're jealous.
- 579
- 00:29:40,659 --> 00:29:42,692
- No, we're best... best friends.
- 580
- 00:29:43,474 --> 00:29:45,612
- - Yes.
- - I can't believe you brought her.
- 581
- 00:29:45,643 --> 00:29:47,676
- I can't believe you brought Christine.
- 582
- 00:29:47,708 --> 00:29:50,596
- I can't believe you shacked up
- with a bitch!
- 583
- 00:29:50,627 --> 00:29:51,680
- Hey! Hey!
- 584
- 00:29:51,712 --> 00:29:54,715
- - That is not gonna be useful today.
- - This bitch...
- 585
- 00:29:55,497 --> 00:29:57,561
- has a lot of reason to be here.
- 586
- 00:29:57,593 --> 00:30:00,564
- I am an excellent negotiator.
- I am a realtor.
- 587
- 00:30:00,596 --> 00:30:03,578
- Yes. Not only do you destroy homes,
- you also sell them.
- 588
- 00:30:03,609 --> 00:30:05,695
- - Isn't that come full circle?
- - Good burn!
- 589
- 00:30:05,727 --> 00:30:07,519
- OK.
- 590
- 00:30:07,550 --> 00:30:08,698
- Hello, all. As you know,
- 591
- 00:30:08,730 --> 00:30:12,713
- this mediation is here to help facilitate
- the terms of your divorce.
- 592
- 00:30:13,495 --> 00:30:14,663
- So, just so you know,
- 593
- 00:30:14,694 --> 00:30:16,613
- this is not a court of law, all right?
- 594
- 00:30:16,644 --> 00:30:20,658
- You will all be civilised and you will
- please address all speech to me.
- 595
- 00:30:20,689 --> 00:30:21,743
- - To you.
- - To you.
- 596
- 00:30:22,525 --> 00:30:23,609
- - No crosstalk.
- - No.
- 597
- 00:30:23,640 --> 00:30:27,676
- Even if we wanna talk to one another,
- we can't. If I wanted to say, "Dina..."
- 598
- 00:30:27,707 --> 00:30:30,512
- - You'd look at me.
- - I'd look at you, I'd say, "Dina...
- 599
- 00:30:30,543 --> 00:30:33,619
- I am going to have...
- a beautiful life with your husband...
- 600
- 00:30:33,650 --> 00:30:34,672
- Dina."
- 601
- 00:30:34,703 --> 00:30:38,614
- - If I were to say, "Marky..."
- - Marcie.
- 602
- 00:30:38,645 --> 00:30:41,533
- "..you're gonna be very disappointed
- in bed
- 603
- 00:30:41,565 --> 00:30:43,672
- cos Dan's downstairs
- is not gonna do the trick."
- 604
- 00:30:45,663 --> 00:30:48,666
- I don't know why you're laughing.
- Frank's not great downstairs, either.
- 605
- 00:30:48,698 --> 00:30:50,689
- To me.
- - We play tennis together.
- 606
- 00:30:50,720 --> 00:30:53,640
- - Frank is no big deal down there.
- - He's right. Frank is not.
- 607
- 00:30:53,671 --> 00:30:54,766
- I have a question, Dan.
- 608
- 00:30:55,548 --> 00:30:58,708
- Why is it that you're playing tennis
- with Frank pantsless?
- 609
- 00:30:58,739 --> 00:31:01,679
- - This is not helping our process.
- - Thank you.
- 610
- 00:31:01,711 --> 00:31:05,663
- - OK. Can we proceed?
- - She's not signing anything, Your Honour.
- 611
- 00:31:05,694 --> 00:31:06,716
- If I may.
- 612
- 00:31:06,747 --> 00:31:09,656
- I'm not a judge. Remember,
- I said this isn't a court of law.
- 613
- 00:31:10,615 --> 00:31:14,567
- My name is Christine Davenport,
- good friend to Deanna.
- 614
- 00:31:14,599 --> 00:31:15,745
- And I am here as a support.
- 615
- 00:31:15,777 --> 00:31:22,670
- And also I have been studying
- lots of documents on legalzoom.com.
- 616
- 00:31:22,701 --> 00:31:25,621
- Thank you. Thank you for that.
- I just want to get this over with.
- 617
- 00:31:25,652 --> 00:31:26,674
- Terrifying!
- 618
- 00:31:26,705 --> 00:31:32,649
- I want it on the record that the accused
- are currently in the process
- 619
- 00:31:32,680 --> 00:31:37,706
- of selling my client's home...
- and not splitting the proceeds.
- 620
- 00:31:37,737 --> 00:31:42,826
- Because the house was 100 per cent
- in Daniel's name. So...
- 621
- 00:31:43,608 --> 00:31:46,600
- That was our house, Dan.
- You know that was our house.
- 622
- 00:31:46,632 --> 00:31:49,791
- I understand, but we're gonna settle this,
- and that's why we're here, OK?
- 623
- 00:31:49,822 --> 00:31:51,668
- - Daniel...
- - Don't interject.
- 624
- 00:31:51,699 --> 00:31:53,765
- - Don't be a weenie.
- - I'm not being a weenie.
- 625
- 00:31:53,796 --> 00:31:55,641
- - OK...
- - I'm not being a weenie.
- 626
- 00:31:55,672 --> 00:31:57,842
- Well, that's debatable. This is not...
- 627
- 00:31:58,624 --> 00:31:59,750
- This is not helping our process.
- 628
- 00:31:59,781 --> 00:32:03,702
- There is no probable clause
- to implicate this witness.
- 629
- 00:32:03,733 --> 00:32:05,641
- I move to dismiss.
- 630
- 00:32:05,672 --> 00:32:09,697
- I just want to say for the record, I just
- needed an upgrade in my life, Deanna.
- 631
- 00:32:09,729 --> 00:32:11,856
- - You son of a...
- OK. To me, please.
- 632
- 00:32:12,638 --> 00:32:14,650
- I'm sorry. You son of a bitch.
- 633
- 00:32:14,681 --> 00:32:17,643
- - No, you're the son of a bitch.
- - You're the son of a bitch!
- 634
- 00:32:17,674 --> 00:32:19,739
- - You're the son of a bitch.
- - I object!
- 635
- 00:32:19,770 --> 00:32:21,866
- I object! I'm not even a judge. OK?
- 636
- 00:32:22,648 --> 00:32:23,795
- I'm just gonna take...
- 637
- 00:32:23,826 --> 00:32:26,683
- I'm just gonna take a break.
- Gotta strategise.
- 638
- 00:32:26,714 --> 00:32:27,788
- Are you coming back?
- 639
- 00:32:27,819 --> 00:32:31,636
- I refuse to disclose information
- about my client.
- 640
- 00:32:33,764 --> 00:32:34,880
- Case adjourned.
- 641
- 00:32:35,860 --> 00:32:37,726
- Deanna!
- 642
- 00:32:37,758 --> 00:32:39,801
- We know what room she's in.
- We don't need to yell.
- 643
- 00:32:39,832 --> 00:32:42,669
- - I like to yell!
- - Let her yell.
- 644
- 00:32:42,700 --> 00:32:44,733
- Guys, why are we going
- to see my mom right now?
- 645
- 00:32:44,765 --> 00:32:46,892
- Because we haven't seen her all week
- and we miss her.
- 646
- 00:32:52,773 --> 00:32:53,899
- Hey, Mom. What's up?
- 647
- 00:32:54,681 --> 00:32:57,673
- Hey, what are you guys doing in here?
- 648
- 00:32:57,705 --> 00:32:59,665
- What's wrong?
- 649
- 00:33:00,760 --> 00:33:02,803
- We filed our paperwork today,
- 650
- 00:33:02,835 --> 00:33:06,755
- so your dad and I are
- officially getting divorced.
- 651
- 00:33:07,820 --> 00:33:09,718
- My God! I'm so sorry.
- 652
- 00:33:09,749 --> 00:33:12,804
- I'm sorry. I don't even like
- talking to you about this stuff.
- 653
- 00:33:12,835 --> 00:33:14,743
- No, don't worry at all.
- 654
- 00:33:14,775 --> 00:33:17,767
- I just know he's gonna fight me
- on, like, every little thing.
- 655
- 00:33:17,799 --> 00:33:19,853
- So it's just...
- it's a little frustrating is all.
- 656
- 00:33:19,884 --> 00:33:22,876
- - That looks really good.
- - Yeah, it used to be in a can.
- 657
- 00:33:22,908 --> 00:33:24,774
- Can I say something?
- 658
- 00:33:24,806 --> 00:33:25,932
- - Just say it, Debbie.
- - Just say it.
- 659
- 00:33:26,714 --> 00:33:27,809
- Yes, honey.
- 660
- 00:33:27,840 --> 00:33:30,832
- We need to get you jackhammer blasted.
- 661
- 00:33:31,719 --> 00:33:34,847
- I just am not really in the mood
- to kind of, you know, hang out.
- 662
- 00:33:34,878 --> 00:33:37,871
- - And I don't want to impose, so...
- - Come on!
- 663
- 00:33:38,882 --> 00:33:40,728
- You're not imposing, Mom.
- 664
- 00:33:40,759 --> 00:33:42,792
- - I am imposing.
- - No, you're not.
- 665
- 00:33:42,825 --> 00:33:43,951
- You're not imposing.
- 666
- 00:33:44,732 --> 00:33:47,715
- You just got some really rough news
- and to be honest,
- 667
- 00:33:47,746 --> 00:33:48,893
- we both got really rough news.
- 668
- 00:33:48,924 --> 00:33:52,835
- But, you're in college now.
- You gotta learn how to party through it.
- 669
- 00:33:52,866 --> 00:33:55,848
- All right, girl.
- I'm gonna go to a party with my mom.
- 670
- 00:33:55,879 --> 00:33:57,892
- Let's do it. I'm gonna be that girl!
- 671
- 00:33:57,923 --> 00:34:00,790
- Come on. I wanna...
- ♪ Party with my mama
- 672
- 00:34:00,822 --> 00:34:02,876
- ♪ We all wanna party with your mama
- 673
- 00:34:02,907 --> 00:34:06,817
- ♪ Party with your mama
- Party with your mama
- 674
- 00:34:06,974 --> 00:34:10,873
- - All right. I'm down to clown!
- - Dee Rock's down to clown!
- 675
- 00:34:10,905 --> 00:34:12,938
- I am also down to clown.
- I'm always down to clown.
- 676
- 00:34:12,969 --> 00:34:14,972
- It's just something that I do
- all the time.
- 677
- 00:34:15,753 --> 00:34:16,964
- - I like your vibe.
- - Why?
- 678
- 00:34:21,061 --> 00:34:24,200
- - It's pretty lively!
- - Yeah, it's a party, Mom.
- 679
- 00:34:24,231 --> 00:34:26,233
- Well, it's also a school night.
- 680
- 00:34:27,015 --> 00:34:29,142
- Dee, I think those guys
- just checked you out.
- 681
- 00:34:29,174 --> 00:34:31,030
- - No, they weren't!
- - Yes, they were.
- 682
- 00:34:31,061 --> 00:34:34,220
- They're probably just looking at my smock.
- It tends to catch the light.
- 683
- 00:34:34,252 --> 00:34:37,036
- They're so young.
- 684
- 00:34:37,161 --> 00:34:39,100
- I think I'm too old to be here.
- 685
- 00:34:39,132 --> 00:34:41,071
- No, come on! It'll be so fun.
- 686
- 00:34:41,102 --> 00:34:43,262
- Let's rock out with our lady dongs out.
- 687
- 00:34:44,043 --> 00:34:45,253
- That's not a thing.
- 688
- 00:34:47,161 --> 00:34:49,028
- Shots! Shots! Shots!
- 689
- 00:34:49,059 --> 00:34:52,062
- - What do we want?
- - Full velocity!
- 690
- 00:34:52,093 --> 00:34:54,064
- Workin' On My Tan B*tch
- 691
- 00:34:54,095 --> 00:34:58,120
- It's so loud in here!
- I can barely hear myself think.
- 692
- 00:35:00,101 --> 00:35:01,144
- Hey!
- 693
- 00:35:01,175 --> 00:35:04,105
- There's your boyfriend.
- Doesn't he look sharp?
- 694
- 00:35:04,137 --> 00:35:06,107
- - Yeah, let's go get a drink.
- - Stairs!
- 695
- 00:35:06,139 --> 00:35:07,181
- Yep.
- 696
- 00:35:07,213 --> 00:35:10,174
- I just wish you would have let me
- bring a covered dish.
- 697
- 00:35:10,205 --> 00:35:14,053
- - That would have been so weird.
- - No, it's weird to not bring something.
- 698
- 00:35:14,084 --> 00:35:15,295
- - Hell, no.
- - Hell, no.
- 699
- 00:35:16,076 --> 00:35:19,079
- Maddie, you're not bringing
- old people to this party.
- 700
- 00:35:19,110 --> 00:35:21,290
- Absolutely not. No moms allowed.
- 701
- 00:35:22,071 --> 00:35:25,169
- I will break your face.
- No-one will recognise you.
- 702
- 00:35:25,200 --> 00:35:28,172
- You'll die in a ditch.
- 703
- 00:35:28,203 --> 00:35:30,132
- OK, my mom needs a drink.
- 704
- 00:35:30,164 --> 00:35:33,250
- So back up before I back you up!
- 705
- 00:35:34,189 --> 00:35:35,262
- Hop out!
- 706
- 00:35:36,305 --> 00:35:39,256
- I'm so proud of you for owning your power.
- 707
- 00:35:39,287 --> 00:35:41,164
- Don't escalate it.
- 708
- 00:35:41,196 --> 00:35:43,156
- But, wow! Impressive.
- 709
- 00:35:43,187 --> 00:35:45,252
- God, I don't know what's sadder,
- 710
- 00:35:45,283 --> 00:35:49,172
- the mom perm...or the mom boobs.
- 711
- 00:35:49,297 --> 00:35:53,155
- Mom perm! I gotta tell... Time-out, guys.
- 712
- 00:35:53,187 --> 00:35:55,336
- God-given curls.
- All I'm doing is a little...
- 713
- 00:35:56,117 --> 00:35:58,339
- maybe a foam mousse,
- a little spray, hot roller
- 714
- 00:35:59,121 --> 00:36:01,164
- and I set it, and I forget it.
- 715
- 00:36:01,196 --> 00:36:05,168
- And secondly, these allowed this one
- to suckle at these teats
- 716
- 00:36:05,200 --> 00:36:06,326
- - for 28 wonderful...
- - We're not...
- 717
- 00:36:07,108 --> 00:36:10,111
- - We're not...
- - ..wonderful tender months.
- 718
- 00:36:10,142 --> 00:36:13,301
- - I wear them around my waist proudly.
- - This isn't the time.
- 719
- 00:36:14,313 --> 00:36:16,169
- I just feel like...
- 720
- 00:36:16,200 --> 00:36:19,360
- I don't know if it's more pathetic
- to party with your mom...
- 721
- 00:36:20,142 --> 00:36:22,206
- or to party with your daughter.
- 722
- 00:36:23,207 --> 00:36:26,148
- Come on. Let's do something cool.
- 723
- 00:36:26,179 --> 00:36:28,317
- Real cool. Bye, nerds.
- 724
- 00:36:34,251 --> 00:36:37,243
- OK, this was a lot of fun.
- 725
- 00:36:37,274 --> 00:36:41,299
- Um, but I want you to enjoy yourselves
- tonight, so I'm just gonna go.
- 726
- 00:36:41,330 --> 00:36:42,363
- No, no, no.
- 727
- 00:36:43,145 --> 00:36:45,345
- - We're gonna have a good time.
- - I should not be here.
- 728
- 00:36:45,376 --> 00:36:48,244
- This is not a party for me.
- 729
- 00:36:48,275 --> 00:36:50,194
- If you go, evil wins!
- 730
- 00:36:50,225 --> 00:36:54,208
- OK, you know what?
- I have an idea. Let's go to the bathroom.
- 731
- 00:36:54,239 --> 00:36:56,273
- - I don't have to tinkle.
- - I think you do.
- 732
- 00:36:56,304 --> 00:37:00,245
- I think I'd know if I had to tinkle.
- Except that one time.
- 733
- 00:37:00,277 --> 00:37:03,165
- All right. Let's go.
- 734
- 00:37:03,196 --> 00:37:05,188
- Please tell me you're not doing
- the cocaine.
- 735
- 00:37:05,219 --> 00:37:06,356
- My God! No! Come on.
- 736
- 00:37:07,337 --> 00:37:11,257
- No, I already told you.
- I do not have to go to the bathroom.
- 737
- 00:37:11,289 --> 00:37:15,178
- Mom, you're a college girl now
- and we gotta make some changes.
- 738
- 00:37:15,418 --> 00:37:17,253
- What does that mean?
- 739
- 00:37:17,284 --> 00:37:19,213
- - Let's start with these glasses.
- - No!
- 740
- 00:37:19,244 --> 00:37:21,267
- - You gotta start wearing contact lenses.
- - No!
- 741
- 00:37:21,299 --> 00:37:23,207
- This is horrible!
- 742
- 00:37:23,238 --> 00:37:26,241
- Then this, this is just...
- Let's get this off.
- 743
- 00:37:26,272 --> 00:37:29,244
- - Come on, Mom.
- - My God! What has gotten into you?
- 744
- 00:37:29,275 --> 00:37:32,424
- Don't fight it, Mom! It's like a Band-Aid.
- You gotta rip it off quickly.
- 745
- 00:37:33,206 --> 00:37:35,427
- - All I have on is my undershirt.
- - Yeah!
- 746
- 00:37:36,314 --> 00:37:38,347
- I'm gonna unbutton.
- 747
- 00:37:38,378 --> 00:37:40,349
- Not one, not two...
- 748
- 00:37:40,381 --> 00:37:42,236
- but three.
- 749
- 00:37:42,267 --> 00:37:44,281
- Not three buttons, no!
- 750
- 00:37:44,312 --> 00:37:45,438
- Look at your breasts!
- 751
- 00:37:46,220 --> 00:37:48,327
- - Mom!
- - What? I don't know what's happening.
- 752
- 00:37:48,358 --> 00:37:51,225
- - Those are gorgeous!
- - They're all right.
- 753
- 00:37:51,257 --> 00:37:54,353
- Maybe how about we just do something
- about that hair just a little bit?
- 754
- 00:37:54,385 --> 00:37:57,388
- No! God, it's full of hair.
- 755
- 00:37:57,419 --> 00:38:00,224
- Come on, it'll be fine. Let me have it.
- 756
- 00:38:00,255 --> 00:38:02,278
- No! God, don't! No!
- 757
- 00:38:02,309 --> 00:38:05,375
- Hey, what's up?
- You're that girl in the coma, right?
- 758
- 00:38:05,406 --> 00:38:07,231
- Not any more.
- 759
- 00:38:07,262 --> 00:38:10,255
- - Yeah, I follow you on Twitter.
- - I don't date fans.
- 760
- 00:38:11,370 --> 00:38:12,403
- OK.
- 761
- 00:38:13,478 --> 00:38:15,301
- So beautiful.
- 762
- 00:38:16,261 --> 00:38:17,367
- God. Now I've got a bare...
- 763
- 00:38:17,398 --> 00:38:19,421
- You know what I can't wear is a bare lip.
- 764
- 00:38:20,360 --> 00:38:22,362
- What is that?
- 765
- 00:38:22,393 --> 00:38:24,270
- It's mauve.
- 766
- 00:38:25,469 --> 00:38:28,274
- You know I love mauve.
- 767
- 00:38:31,381 --> 00:38:34,467
- No, I'm not a fan, I just...
- I got a lot of respect for comas.
- 768
- 00:38:35,375 --> 00:38:37,408
- I like sleeping pretty long, too, I guess.
- 769
- 00:38:39,462 --> 00:38:41,349
- Whoa!
- 770
- 00:38:41,381 --> 00:38:43,351
- God! Are you in a coma again?
- 771
- 00:38:43,383 --> 00:38:45,385
- God, I gotta get help.
- 772
- 00:38:48,388 --> 00:38:49,483
- Can I look? Can I look now?
- 773
- 00:38:49,515 --> 00:38:51,433
- Yes! I think you're done.
- 774
- 00:38:56,449 --> 00:38:58,419
- Hey! Wow!
- 775
- 00:38:59,441 --> 00:39:02,309
- My God! "What are you, 20?"
- 776
- 00:39:02,444 --> 00:39:05,291
- - OK. I wouldn't go that far.
- - I'm 21.
- 777
- 00:39:05,322 --> 00:39:06,375
- OK.
- 778
- 00:39:06,407 --> 00:39:08,450
- You know,
- I used to wear my hair like this.
- 779
- 00:39:08,481 --> 00:39:10,431
- Eons ago...
- 780
- 00:39:10,463 --> 00:39:13,341
- when you were in here.
- 781
- 00:39:13,372 --> 00:39:15,322
- You look so beautiful, Mom.
- 782
- 00:39:15,488 --> 00:39:17,334
- Wow!
- 783
- 00:39:17,365 --> 00:39:19,461
- You know what? OK.
- 784
- 00:39:19,492 --> 00:39:21,422
- I think you're ready, college girl.
- 785
- 00:39:22,423 --> 00:39:25,394
- - Are you sure?
- - Yeah, let's go. But let's leave this.
- 786
- 00:39:25,426 --> 00:39:28,335
- Let's never touch...
- or talk about that brush again.
- 787
- 00:39:28,366 --> 00:39:29,451
- OK.
- 788
- 00:39:29,535 --> 00:39:31,464
- - Thank you.
- - Of course. I love you.
- 789
- 00:39:31,495 --> 00:39:33,445
- I love you, too.
- 790
- 00:39:33,476 --> 00:39:34,498
- Boom.
- 791
- 00:39:37,345 --> 00:39:38,471
- - Hey.
- - Hey!
- 792
- 00:39:40,473 --> 00:39:42,350
- Get a room!
- 793
- 00:39:42,381 --> 00:39:45,447
- Just kidding, don't. L-O-L. Hashtag.
- 794
- 00:39:46,520 --> 00:39:48,481
- - Hey, Ms Miles.
- - Hi, how are you?
- 795
- 00:39:48,512 --> 00:39:50,420
- Good. You guys both look amazing!
- 796
- 00:39:50,452 --> 00:39:52,422
- - Thank you.
- - Charmer.
- 797
- 00:39:52,454 --> 00:39:54,476
- I heard you're back at school now,
- which is awesome.
- 798
- 00:39:54,508 --> 00:39:56,478
- - It is.
- - You get to party with all of us.
- 799
- 00:39:56,510 --> 00:39:57,563
- Well...
- 800
- 00:39:58,345 --> 00:40:01,473
- How about a drink or something?
- Let me introduce you to my friend Jack.
- 801
- 00:40:01,504 --> 00:40:02,579
- Hi, I'm Jack.
- 802
- 00:40:03,360 --> 00:40:04,560
- Deanna. Hi.
- 803
- 00:40:05,540 --> 00:40:07,386
- Wow, that's...
- 804
- 00:40:07,417 --> 00:40:10,379
- You have wonderfully intricate hair.
- 805
- 00:40:11,442 --> 00:40:13,382
- - Thank you.
- - Yeah.
- 806
- 00:40:13,538 --> 00:40:15,530
- Well, can I get you something to drink?
- 807
- 00:40:15,561 --> 00:40:20,545
- OK. I would love a Chardonnay,
- maybe something oaky.
- 808
- 00:40:21,515 --> 00:40:23,371
- Um...
- 809
- 00:40:24,372 --> 00:40:25,540
- Did you pick up the Chardonnay?
- 810
- 00:40:25,571 --> 00:40:30,388
- - We have some boxed wine.
- - We have some boxed wine.
- 811
- 00:40:30,420 --> 00:40:31,566
- - In a box?
- - I don't know.
- 812
- 00:40:31,598 --> 00:40:33,506
- I'm sure it tastes real cardboardy.
- 813
- 00:40:33,537 --> 00:40:35,624
- I'm sure it tastes very cardboardy!
- 814
- 00:40:36,405 --> 00:40:39,628
- Really, it comes in a plastic bladder,
- so it's not touching the cardboard.
- 815
- 00:40:40,409 --> 00:40:42,631
- I told him we should not get anything
- that comes in a bladder.
- 816
- 00:40:43,413 --> 00:40:46,426
- - I'm the only one who likes wine.
- - I love wine!
- 817
- 00:40:46,457 --> 00:40:48,574
- But I don't like drinking it
- out of bladders.
- 818
- 00:40:49,450 --> 00:40:50,586
- I don't blame you.
- 819
- 00:40:51,515 --> 00:40:53,485
- She'll just have a shot and a beer,
- please.
- 820
- 00:40:53,517 --> 00:40:54,538
- - Perfect.
- - There we go.
- 821
- 00:40:54,570 --> 00:40:58,615
- Why not? I'm here to get
- the full college experience.
- 822
- 00:40:58,647 --> 00:41:01,650
- So...what is the spirit du jour?
- 823
- 00:41:02,432 --> 00:41:04,590
- This is 100 per cent agave tequila.
- 824
- 00:41:04,621 --> 00:41:08,490
- Agave! I use that when I bake muffins.
- 825
- 00:41:08,521 --> 00:41:09,553
- - OK.
- - She loves to bake.
- 826
- 00:41:09,585 --> 00:41:11,503
- - I do.
- - All right, let's do it.
- 827
- 00:41:12,546 --> 00:41:15,665
- - What do we want?
- - Full velocity!
- 828
- 00:41:16,446 --> 00:41:18,553
- And equal work for equal pay.
- 829
- 00:41:21,525 --> 00:41:23,464
- God.
- 830
- 00:41:23,495 --> 00:41:25,633
- - God.
- - That is aggressive.
- 831
- 00:41:26,634 --> 00:41:28,553
- That's just burning.
- 832
- 00:41:28,584 --> 00:41:30,659
- It's burning all the way down.
- 833
- 00:41:31,441 --> 00:41:33,526
- Just follow my lead
- and we'll do this again, OK?
- 834
- 00:41:33,558 --> 00:41:36,540
- We'll try it again.
- 835
- 00:41:37,562 --> 00:41:39,584
- All right. What do we want?
- 836
- 00:41:39,616 --> 00:41:41,691
- Full velocity!
- 837
- 00:41:42,473 --> 00:41:46,697
- And cleaner oceans.
- Our coral reefs are dying, guys.
- 838
- 00:41:47,613 --> 00:41:50,522
- No, er...Ms Miles...
- 839
- 00:41:53,693 --> 00:41:59,564
- Look, Ms Miles, coral reefs and equal
- work for equal pay, all great things.
- 840
- 00:41:59,595 --> 00:42:00,711
- But at our parties...
- 841
- 00:42:01,493 --> 00:42:05,705
- when somebody says "What do we want?"
- we just say "Full velocity."
- 842
- 00:42:06,487 --> 00:42:07,676
- You don't need to say anything else.
- 843
- 00:42:07,707 --> 00:42:09,574
- It's more of a party tradition.
- 844
- 00:42:09,605 --> 00:42:13,505
- OK. So, it's just a flat answer of full...
- 845
- 00:42:13,724 --> 00:42:16,487
- - Velocity.
- - Velocity.
- 846
- 00:42:16,518 --> 00:42:18,593
- - OK.
- - You ready?
- 847
- 00:42:18,624 --> 00:42:20,491
- Well...
- 848
- 00:42:20,522 --> 00:42:21,679
- Third time's the charm, right?
- 849
- 00:42:21,711 --> 00:42:25,579
- - What do we want?
- - Full velocity!
- 850
- 00:42:25,611 --> 00:42:30,512
- And full maternity leave
- for non-gender-specific working parents.
- 851
- 00:42:32,566 --> 00:42:34,537
- And full velocity!
- 852
- 00:42:46,758 --> 00:42:48,614
- Where's my mom?
- 853
- 00:42:48,645 --> 00:42:51,554
- She's over there busting it out.
- 854
- 00:42:54,557 --> 00:42:55,610
- Hi, honey!
- 855
- 00:42:55,642 --> 00:42:57,612
- Hi!
- 856
- 00:42:58,707 --> 00:43:01,649
- I feel that in my C-section scar!
- 857
- 00:43:02,586 --> 00:43:03,734
- - Are you OK?
- - Ooh, yeah!
- 858
- 00:43:03,765 --> 00:43:05,767
- ♪ Let me see you MILF shake
- 859
- 00:43:06,747 --> 00:43:08,749
- ♪ Let me see you MILF shake
- 860
- 00:43:10,616 --> 00:43:12,597
- Thinking Out Loud
- 861
- 00:43:12,628 --> 00:43:15,663
- ♪ Your soul could never grow old
- 862
- 00:43:15,694 --> 00:43:17,696
- ♪ It's evergreen
- 863
- 00:43:18,770 --> 00:43:22,565
- It's not over. It's full velocity!
- Let's go! Come on, guys!
- 864
- 00:43:22,597 --> 00:43:25,558
- ♪ Baby, your smile's
- 865
- 00:43:25,589 --> 00:43:29,656
- ♪ Forever in my mind and memory...
- 866
- 00:43:35,736 --> 00:43:38,581
- My God!
- 867
- 00:43:38,676 --> 00:43:39,781
- My God! Mom!
- 868
- 00:43:41,700 --> 00:43:43,733
- You don't have to make a big deal.
- 869
- 00:43:43,764 --> 00:43:46,747
- Don't jump to conclusions.
- You don't know what's happening here.
- 870
- 00:43:46,778 --> 00:43:50,782
- Really? It looks like my mother is doing
- the walk of shame out of a frat house.
- 871
- 00:43:52,607 --> 00:43:55,766
- OK, I guess technically that's...
- what's happening. Let's just go.
- 872
- 00:43:55,797 --> 00:43:57,778
- Let's get out of here. My God!
- 873
- 00:43:58,759 --> 00:44:00,802
- I don't think you've gotta rub it in.!
- 874
- 00:44:00,834 --> 00:44:03,618
- Fella, close your robe.
- 875
- 00:44:03,649 --> 00:44:05,641
- Can we please just get out of here?
- 876
- 00:44:05,672 --> 00:44:06,840
- Aren't they gonna serve breakfast?
- 877
- 00:44:07,622 --> 00:44:09,844
- No, they're not gonna serve breakfast.
- This isn't the Hilton.
- 878
- 00:44:10,625 --> 00:44:13,659
- I knew that. But I thought maybe
- they'll have a bagel spread or something.
- 879
- 00:44:13,690 --> 00:44:14,755
- My God!
- 880
- 00:44:15,619 --> 00:44:18,800
- My God!
- My foot keeps charley horsing.
- 881
- 00:44:18,832 --> 00:44:21,710
- I'm telling you,
- I can't even get my boots back on.
- 882
- 00:44:21,741 --> 00:44:24,827
- I guess that's what I get
- for getting my toes curled last night.
- 883
- 00:44:24,859 --> 00:44:26,829
- And I mean cu-urled.
- 884
- 00:44:26,861 --> 00:44:28,727
- Mom, please stop!
- 885
- 00:44:28,758 --> 00:44:32,867
- I think it was mutually enjoyable...
- for both parties.
- 886
- 00:44:33,649 --> 00:44:34,858
- I mean, I had fun.
- 887
- 00:44:35,640 --> 00:44:38,737
- He enjoyed himself.
- He kept yelling, "Please, more!"
- 888
- 00:44:38,768 --> 00:44:41,876
- I thought he was doing a scene
- from Oliver! "Please, more."
- 889
- 00:44:42,658 --> 00:44:44,743
- I heard that through the wall
- 890
- 00:44:44,774 --> 00:44:46,809
- and I thought he was
- saying, "Cheese store."
- 891
- 00:44:46,840 --> 00:44:48,726
- And I was very confused.
- 892
- 00:44:48,759 --> 00:44:51,751
- One time we were playing
- kind of a cheesemonger
- 893
- 00:44:51,782 --> 00:44:53,722
- and I was a poor peasant girl but...
- 894
- 00:44:53,753 --> 00:44:54,890
- That's disgusting, Mom.
- 895
- 00:44:55,672 --> 00:44:57,715
- - No! It was fun.
- - Mom!
- 896
- 00:44:57,747 --> 00:44:58,758
- And I love cheese.
- 897
- 00:44:58,789 --> 00:45:00,708
- I love you so much.
- 898
- 00:45:00,739 --> 00:45:03,826
- Have I asked you once about any of this?
- No. You just keep blabbing.
- 899
- 00:45:03,857 --> 00:45:07,684
- I'm asking you to please be quiet
- and stop talking.
- 900
- 00:45:07,715 --> 00:45:10,801
- OK. I think we should keep
- communication lines open.
- 901
- 00:45:11,667 --> 00:45:13,752
- You know what? I'm older, I'm wiser.
- I...
- 902
- 00:45:13,909 --> 00:45:16,755
- This, essentially a Google.
- 903
- 00:45:17,725 --> 00:45:20,759
- Right down here, where you came from.
- 904
- 00:45:20,791 --> 00:45:22,751
- I'm like the Google of vaginas.
- 905
- 00:45:22,782 --> 00:45:24,837
- "Ask me anything, please."
- 906
- 00:45:24,868 --> 00:45:26,682
- Turn off your vagoogle.
- 907
- 00:45:26,714 --> 00:45:28,706
- - It can't be turned off.
- - OK, I don't like it.
- 908
- 00:45:28,737 --> 00:45:31,928
- You're scaring me...
- and you're scaring everyone around you.
- 909
- 00:45:32,710 --> 00:45:35,848
- I think... I think my vagoogle
- scared Jack last night.
- 910
- 00:45:35,879 --> 00:45:37,913
- - My God!
- - But in a good way.
- 911
- 00:45:38,695 --> 00:45:40,874
- Like when you intentionally
- go through a haunted house.
- 912
- 00:45:40,905 --> 00:45:42,782
- Eww!
- 913
- 00:45:42,814 --> 00:45:43,898
- Not saying...
- 914
- 00:45:44,826 --> 00:45:45,942
- You know what I mean.
- 915
- 00:45:46,724 --> 00:45:48,872
- Please, I just don't wanna
- talk about your vagoogle.
- 916
- 00:45:55,932 --> 00:46:00,759
- All right.
- I've got a little pop quiz for you here.
- 917
- 00:46:00,791 --> 00:46:03,950
- But don't worry, I promise to grade it
- pharaoh and squaraoh.
- 918
- 00:46:08,809 --> 00:46:13,939
- Hey, I've got to tell you,
- your work so far is impeccable.
- 919
- 00:46:13,971 --> 00:46:15,973
- This department is lucky to have you back.
- 920
- 00:46:16,755 --> 00:46:20,821
- My gosh. Wayne, thank you so much.
- You know, it's still my passion.
- 921
- 00:46:20,853 --> 00:46:23,793
- I guess once a dighead,
- always a dighead?
- 922
- 00:46:23,824 --> 00:46:26,775
- - Yes, you certainly are.
- - Guess that makes me a dighead, too.
- 923
- 00:46:26,806 --> 00:46:29,768
- OK, my advice to you
- is to crack a book, all right?
- 924
- 00:46:29,799 --> 00:46:32,917
- You are failing this class
- in spectacular fashion.
- 925
- 00:46:35,869 --> 00:46:37,964
- And I would love to see you
- on a dig one day.
- 926
- 00:46:37,996 --> 00:46:41,770
- That makes two of us
- wanting to see me on a dig.
- 927
- 00:46:41,802 --> 00:46:43,960
- That's...
- Thank you. It's a lovely sediment.
- 928
- 00:46:45,962 --> 00:46:48,829
- No. I did not. I did it, though.
- 929
- 00:46:50,769 --> 00:46:52,865
- You're gonna make me become
- Stone-unhinged.
- 930
- 00:46:56,858 --> 00:46:58,881
- No, you get out!
- 931
- 00:46:58,912 --> 00:47:01,957
- Anyway, I can't wait to see
- your mid-term presentation.
- 932
- 00:47:01,988 --> 00:47:03,938
- I'm pretty excited for you to read it.
- 933
- 00:47:03,969 --> 00:47:06,806
- No, no. It's an oral presentation.
- 934
- 00:47:06,837 --> 00:47:08,808
- It's a... What is it?
- 935
- 00:47:08,839 --> 00:47:11,999
- Instead of with your hands, you present
- your work with your mouth and tongue.
- 936
- 00:47:13,824 --> 00:47:15,857
- OK. You're gonna be great.
- 937
- 00:47:15,889 --> 00:47:17,828
- Just keep up the good work. OK.
- 938
- 00:47:21,863 --> 00:47:22,927
- What's the matter?
- 939
- 00:47:22,958 --> 00:47:26,931
- I'm just not fond of speaking in public.
- 940
- 00:47:27,828 --> 00:47:32,854
- OK, let's get started on those quizzes.
- You have 15 minutes, so do not dally.
- 941
- 00:47:39,881 --> 00:47:40,966
- Dee Dee.
- 942
- 00:47:40,997 --> 00:47:43,917
- - Hey, Jack.
- - Hey! I um...
- 943
- 00:47:43,948 --> 00:47:48,828
- I saw Maddie and she said that
- you were gonna be in here studying.
- 944
- 00:47:48,860 --> 00:47:50,038
- So, I got you a coffee.
- 945
- 00:47:50,070 --> 00:47:52,906
- Thank you, Jack. That's so nice of you.
- 946
- 00:47:52,937 --> 00:47:54,897
- I couldn't find any Chardonnay, so...
- 947
- 00:47:54,929 --> 00:47:57,035
- It's probably for the best.
- 948
- 00:47:58,046 --> 00:48:01,070
- Hey, have you...
- been getting my texts?
- 949
- 00:48:02,009 --> 00:48:03,875
- Um...
- 950
- 00:48:03,906 --> 00:48:05,043
- You know what? I usually...
- 951
- 00:48:05,074 --> 00:48:08,025
- I turn off my little chimey alert.
- 952
- 00:48:08,056 --> 00:48:11,956
- Yeah. You gotta be quiet in the library,
- right?
- 953
- 00:48:13,989 --> 00:48:15,877
- Wow, that's...
- 954
- 00:48:15,991 --> 00:48:17,941
- That's a lot of texts, Jack.
- 955
- 00:48:17,973 --> 00:48:20,934
- - Now that I'm here...
- - Yeah.
- 956
- 00:48:20,965 --> 00:48:22,905
- Yeah, I can just tell you.
- 957
- 00:48:23,959 --> 00:48:25,898
- I um...
- 958
- 00:48:25,929 --> 00:48:28,025
- I kind of can't stop thinking about you.
- 959
- 00:48:29,933 --> 00:48:31,059
- Jack, that is so sweet.
- 960
- 00:48:31,967 --> 00:48:34,031
- You wanna know
- what I can't stop thinking about?
- 961
- 00:48:34,062 --> 00:48:37,034
- Us. Me and you, we leave this school.
- 962
- 00:48:37,065 --> 00:48:40,048
- We can go backpacking across Europe.
- 963
- 00:48:40,079 --> 00:48:42,008
- Me and you - Eat Pray Love style.
- 964
- 00:48:42,039 --> 00:48:46,116
- I-I can...
- I can bartend, we'll make it work...
- 965
- 00:48:46,898 --> 00:48:47,951
- Jack.
- 966
- 00:48:48,900 --> 00:48:51,893
- Years ago,
- somebody asking me to do that with them
- 967
- 00:48:51,924 --> 00:48:54,010
- would have been an absolute dream.
- 968
- 00:48:54,041 --> 00:48:57,128
- But I can't travel with a backpack
- any more.
- 969
- 00:48:58,129 --> 00:49:00,913
- I need luggage with wheels.
- 970
- 00:49:00,945 --> 00:49:02,008
- I mean, I...
- 971
- 00:49:02,039 --> 00:49:04,125
- Even my carry-on has wheels, Jack.
- 972
- 00:49:05,094 --> 00:49:08,045
- My hips can't really sustain a backpack.
- 973
- 00:49:08,077 --> 00:49:11,090
- They're never the same after a childbirth,
- you know, but...
- 974
- 00:49:11,945 --> 00:49:14,938
- But it's such a wonderful offer
- 975
- 00:49:14,969 --> 00:49:16,981
- and you're such a terrific guy but...
- 976
- 00:49:18,035 --> 00:49:20,068
- I think what we had the other night
- 977
- 00:49:20,099 --> 00:49:24,134
- was really kind of
- a one-time special thing.
- 978
- 00:49:37,075 --> 00:49:39,995
- That was amazing!
- DEANNA: That was so nice.
- 979
- 00:49:41,027 --> 00:49:42,164
- My God!
- 980
- 00:49:44,009 --> 00:49:45,167
- My God!
- 981
- 00:49:45,949 --> 00:49:47,075
- - My God!
- - My God.
- 982
- 00:49:47,106 --> 00:49:49,108
- You are my sexual Dumbledore.
- 983
- 00:49:49,139 --> 00:49:51,141
- - I mean...
- - What does that mean?
- 984
- 00:49:51,173 --> 00:49:54,030
- Dumbledore, he's from Harry Potter.
- 985
- 00:49:54,061 --> 00:49:57,075
- You know, Harry Potter's, like, mentor...
- 986
- 00:49:57,106 --> 00:49:59,191
- he's got the beard, and he's got the hat.
- 987
- 00:49:59,973 --> 00:50:02,997
- - Dumbledore.
- - I'm gonna stop you right there.
- 988
- 00:50:05,103 --> 00:50:07,064
- Um...this is just...
- 989
- 00:50:07,095 --> 00:50:09,088
- This will ride you through life.
- 990
- 00:50:09,119 --> 00:50:13,154
- I don't think ever there's a woman
- that's gonna want you to say
- 991
- 00:50:13,185 --> 00:50:15,146
- that during a sexual encounter
- 992
- 00:50:15,177 --> 00:50:19,984
- you're thinking of her
- as an old, grey, grizzled wizard.
- 993
- 00:50:20,015 --> 00:50:21,141
- Aww!
- 994
- 00:50:21,172 --> 00:50:23,060
- - Yeah.
- - Aww! Um...
- 995
- 00:50:23,091 --> 00:50:26,125
- - OK. I'm sorry.
- - So good up until...
- 996
- 00:50:26,157 --> 00:50:29,180
- until you called me
- an old, grey, male wizard.
- 997
- 00:50:29,212 --> 00:50:31,047
- Wizard talk's gone.
- 998
- 00:50:31,078 --> 00:50:33,007
- - Well...
- - All right.
- 999
- 00:50:33,237 --> 00:50:35,207
- OK, well, um...
- 1000
- 00:50:36,177 --> 00:50:38,242
- - I'd better...
- - See you later?
- 1001
- 00:50:39,024 --> 00:50:41,235
- No, no, no.
- That was the last...
- 1002
- 00:50:42,016 --> 00:50:44,029
- That was the last time...
- 1003
- 00:50:44,060 --> 00:50:46,115
- - You said that earlier.
- - I know.
- 1004
- 00:50:46,146 --> 00:50:51,151
- I know, but your wrist got involved
- and I got distracted, so...
- 1005
- 00:50:52,163 --> 00:50:54,029
- Last time. OK.
- 1006
- 00:50:55,103 --> 00:50:57,178
- OK, that's it. And we're done.
- 1007
- 00:50:57,209 --> 00:50:59,211
- It's a clean... clean break.
- 1008
- 00:51:00,233 --> 00:51:02,246
- You know what? Just a finale.
- 1009
- 00:51:06,177 --> 00:51:08,085
- OK. I'll text you.
- 1010
- 00:51:10,212 --> 00:51:12,204
- OK, I'll miss that. I'll miss that.
- 1011
- 00:51:12,235 --> 00:51:15,155
- OK. You go that way. I'll go this way.
- 1012
- 00:51:16,145 --> 00:51:17,262
- Damn it, man.
- 1013
- 00:51:20,181 --> 00:51:22,057
- My God!
- 1014
- 00:51:23,132 --> 00:51:24,175
- Come on, come on, come on.
- 1015
- 00:51:24,206 --> 00:51:25,270
- Hello?
- 1016
- 00:51:26,052 --> 00:51:27,147
- <i>What are you doing?</i>
- 1017
- 00:51:27,178 --> 00:51:30,139
- I think my forks have oxidised.
- 1018
- 00:51:30,171 --> 00:51:32,131
- I'm just... I'm trying to get it off.
- 1019
- 00:51:32,162 --> 00:51:34,237
- <i>- What are you doing?</i>
- - I just had sex in the library.
- 1020
- 00:51:34,268 --> 00:51:37,105
- - What?
- <i>- I just had sex in the library.</i>
- 1021
- 00:51:37,136 --> 00:51:38,220
- You had what?
- 1022
- 00:51:39,075 --> 00:51:41,067
- I... I just had sex in the library.
- 1023
- 00:51:41,098 --> 00:51:44,091
- You had sex in a library?
- 1024
- 00:51:44,122 --> 00:51:45,258
- <i>- Frank!</i>
- - No, don't tell Frank.
- 1025
- 00:51:45,290 --> 00:51:48,282
- - Deanna just had sex in a public place.
- - What? Where?
- 1026
- 00:51:48,314 --> 00:51:51,223
- - In the stacks!
- - In her slacks?
- 1027
- 00:51:51,254 --> 00:51:53,320
- No. Shut up, Frank.
- 1028
- 00:51:54,101 --> 00:51:55,311
- Hang on for one second.
- 1029
- 00:51:59,138 --> 00:52:01,275
- You know what? I have to go.
- I'll call you later.
- 1030
- 00:52:03,309 --> 00:52:05,248
- Can you believe this, Frank?
- 1031
- 00:52:05,279 --> 00:52:07,188
- Good for Deanna.
- 1032
- 00:52:08,147 --> 00:52:09,273
- Frank?
- 1033
- 00:52:13,215 --> 00:52:15,321
- Why don't we ever have sex in public?
- 1034
- 00:52:16,218 --> 00:52:18,324
- Because, honey,
- last time you blew your knee out
- 1035
- 00:52:19,106 --> 00:52:21,275
- and I had to carry you out of Six Flags.
- 1036
- 00:52:25,133 --> 00:52:27,166
- But I do like those fuzzy socks.
- 1037
- 00:52:27,197 --> 00:52:29,210
- Frank.
- 1038
- 00:52:31,201 --> 00:52:33,308
- Thanks for coming, Mom.
- Debbie's really freaking out.
- 1039
- 00:52:33,339 --> 00:52:36,280
- It sounded serious.
- I'm gonna make my lasagne.
- 1040
- 00:52:38,344 --> 00:52:39,450
- OK...
- 1041
- 00:52:40,367 --> 00:52:42,234
- Hey, Debbie.
- 1042
- 00:52:42,265 --> 00:52:45,247
- Do you think you're ready to maybe
- start talking about it now?
- 1043
- 00:52:45,278 --> 00:52:47,343
- She went to a job fair
- and now she's all freaked out.
- 1044
- 00:52:48,240 --> 00:52:51,243
- I thought fairs were supposed to be fun.
- This one wasn't fun at all.
- 1045
- 00:52:51,274 --> 00:52:53,464
- I don't even know
- what I really wanna do with my life.
- 1046
- 00:52:54,246 --> 00:52:56,446
- - Why did I study kinesiology?
- - That's...
- 1047
- 00:52:57,228 --> 00:52:59,460
- I mean, that's basically
- like physical therapy, right?
- 1048
- 00:53:00,241 --> 00:53:01,400
- Kind of, but not as useful.
- 1049
- 00:53:01,431 --> 00:53:03,475
- It's the theoretical study
- of human movement.
- 1050
- 00:53:04,392 --> 00:53:06,321
- OK. Wow.
- 1051
- 00:53:06,353 --> 00:53:10,304
- I can see that does feel slightly limited
- 1052
- 00:53:10,336 --> 00:53:13,370
- in employment opportunities.
- 1053
- 00:53:14,267 --> 00:53:18,354
- I took out $45,000 in student loans
- and what am I ready for? Nothing.
- 1054
- 00:53:18,385 --> 00:53:22,275
- OK, come on. You can't make
- such a big deal out of everything.
- 1055
- 00:53:22,306 --> 00:53:24,391
- Ladies, you gotta have a little faith
- in yourselves.
- 1056
- 00:53:24,423 --> 00:53:29,376
- I spent 20 years just giving it all away.
- I worried about what other people thought.
- 1057
- 00:53:29,407 --> 00:53:32,358
- I worried about what they thought
- I should be doing. Never what I thought.
- 1058
- 00:53:32,389 --> 00:53:35,277
- Look at me now.
- I'm living in a dorm with a roommate
- 1059
- 00:53:35,309 --> 00:53:37,279
- that I'm pretty sure watches me
- while I sleep.
- 1060
- 00:53:37,311 --> 00:53:39,480
- I got the clothes on my back.
- I got nothing.
- 1061
- 00:53:39,512 --> 00:53:42,348
- The last 20 years of my life
- have been a real shit show.
- 1062
- 00:53:42,379 --> 00:53:43,453
- Thank you.
- 1063
- 00:53:44,350 --> 00:53:46,310
- Not meaning you... I mean...
- 1064
- 00:53:46,341 --> 00:53:48,354
- You know... You know what I mean.
- I just...
- 1065
- 00:53:48,385 --> 00:53:49,469
- Give me those fingers.
- 1066
- 00:53:49,501 --> 00:53:53,296
- Every single little thing about you
- is a dream.
- 1067
- 00:53:53,328 --> 00:53:54,454
- I wouldn't change any of that.
- 1068
- 00:53:54,485 --> 00:53:57,425
- The rest, I would like to
- rewind that clock
- 1069
- 00:53:57,457 --> 00:54:01,492
- and 20 years ago start speaking up
- for myself, so that's my point.
- 1070
- 00:54:01,523 --> 00:54:04,339
- You gals are terrific.
- You're not quitters.
- 1071
- 00:54:04,370 --> 00:54:06,424
- I'm afraid I'm never gonna be
- in a real relationship.
- 1072
- 00:54:06,455 --> 00:54:08,343
- Amanda! Come on!
- 1073
- 00:54:08,374 --> 00:54:10,480
- - Come on!
- - I'm so sorry.
- 1074
- 00:54:10,511 --> 00:54:14,548
- Honey, if you can't use what the good Lord
- made you and make that work,
- 1075
- 00:54:15,329 --> 00:54:17,446
- then what the hell hope do any of us have?
- 1076
- 00:54:17,478 --> 00:54:20,481
- - None.
- - You're all amazing. I mean, look at you.
- 1077
- 00:54:20,512 --> 00:54:24,328
- You're all lovely here
- and you're smart and you're wonderful
- 1078
- 00:54:24,360 --> 00:54:26,560
- and you're weird, in the best, best way.
- 1079
- 00:54:27,342 --> 00:54:28,509
- I just... I mean, if you look...
- 1080
- 00:54:28,541 --> 00:54:30,522
- My God! Look at Carol's legs.
- 1081
- 00:54:30,553 --> 00:54:32,378
- Legs for days.
- 1082
- 00:54:32,409 --> 00:54:33,483
- - Thank you.
- - You're welcome.
- 1083
- 00:54:33,514 --> 00:54:35,496
- Just enjoy 'em, for God's sakes.
- 1084
- 00:54:35,527 --> 00:54:39,333
- Just... We all have to realise
- everybody's great, right?
- 1085
- 00:54:39,364 --> 00:54:40,563
- And this is good. OK?
- 1086
- 00:54:41,345 --> 00:54:43,452
- And this is good, and this is good,
- and these are good.
- 1087
- 00:54:43,483 --> 00:54:46,392
- - And this is... My God!
- - Mom, do not touch Amanda's butt!
- 1088
- 00:54:46,423 --> 00:54:47,561
- You know what it makes me think of?
- 1089
- 00:54:48,457 --> 00:54:50,501
- It's like a three-day-old loaf of bread.
- 1090
- 00:54:50,532 --> 00:54:53,463
- It's firmer, but it's kept
- its original shape.
- 1091
- 00:54:53,494 --> 00:54:56,549
- Now, I... I think I've just been
- looser structurally.
- 1092
- 00:54:56,580 --> 00:55:00,365
- You know, I could explain to you
- the differences in your bodies.
- 1093
- 00:55:00,397 --> 00:55:01,564
- But only as it pertains to movement.
- 1094
- 00:55:01,596 --> 00:55:05,381
- Look what's happening right now.
- Look what's happening right...
- 1095
- 00:55:05,412 --> 00:55:06,559
- You're using your degree.
- 1096
- 00:55:06,590 --> 00:55:09,426
- - You're doing it!
- - I am.
- 1097
- 00:55:09,458 --> 00:55:12,534
- You guys, there's a party tonight
- at Deltas and it's '80s themed.
- 1098
- 00:55:12,565 --> 00:55:15,495
- So, ladies, time to crush a party.
- 1099
- 00:55:15,526 --> 00:55:17,591
- I brought my dress-up trunk.
- 1100
- 00:55:18,373 --> 00:55:20,479
- Girls Just Want To Have Fun
- 1101
- 00:55:26,465 --> 00:55:29,395
- <i>♪ I come home in the morning light</i>
- 1102
- 00:55:29,427 --> 00:55:33,576
- <i>♪ My mother says when you gonna</i>
- <i>live your life right?</i>
- 1103
- 00:55:34,411 --> 00:55:37,435
- <i>♪ Mother dear...</i>
- - I told you we should have done Dynasty.
- 1104
- 00:55:37,466 --> 00:55:39,582
- Why do they all look so good?
- 1105
- 00:55:39,614 --> 00:55:42,440
- - Welcome to the '80s!
- - Thank you.
- 1106
- 00:55:42,471 --> 00:55:44,431
- Hey! Theta Gammas!
- 1107
- 00:55:44,462 --> 00:55:47,590
- Hi, there! Well,
- I'm not officially a member.
- 1108
- 00:55:47,622 --> 00:55:49,624
- I'm a little too young to join a sorority.
- 1109
- 00:55:51,615 --> 00:55:53,544
- No!
- 1110
- 00:55:54,420 --> 00:55:55,619
- Don't drink that.
- 1111
- 00:55:55,651 --> 00:55:58,644
- This is a 2017 Italian Chardonnay.
- 1112
- 00:55:59,425 --> 00:56:01,512
- - Jack...
- - Yeah, it's truly one of a kind.
- 1113
- 00:56:01,543 --> 00:56:03,482
- Very oaky, very buttery.
- 1114
- 00:56:03,514 --> 00:56:05,599
- Because it was a hot and dry fall
- this year in Italy.
- 1115
- 00:56:05,630 --> 00:56:08,612
- So, the grapes are very, very succulent.
- 1116
- 00:56:08,644 --> 00:56:12,544
- Well, far be from me
- to turn down a succulent grape.
- 1117
- 00:56:12,575 --> 00:56:15,484
- You're being really weird
- with the grape descriptions.
- 1118
- 00:56:15,515 --> 00:56:17,611
- It's lovely. It really is.
- 1119
- 00:56:17,642 --> 00:56:19,446
- Hey, Grandma.
- 1120
- 00:56:20,447 --> 00:56:23,534
- Hey, Jack, could you help me
- track down a drink?
- 1121
- 00:56:24,618 --> 00:56:27,454
- OK, Jennifer, there's a keg out back.
- 1122
- 00:56:27,486 --> 00:56:29,477
- There's also boxed wine.
- 1123
- 00:56:29,633 --> 00:56:32,605
- You know what? I think we're gonna go
- take a little spin around,
- 1124
- 00:56:32,636 --> 00:56:34,576
- try to figure out who shot JR.
- 1125
- 00:56:35,609 --> 00:56:36,683
- Someone was shot?
- 1126
- 00:56:37,464 --> 00:56:40,458
- No. No! God, no, it's from Dallas.
- 1127
- 00:56:40,489 --> 00:56:41,636
- It's a television programme.
- 1128
- 00:56:41,667 --> 00:56:44,462
- OK, I'll explain it.
- 1129
- 00:56:45,598 --> 00:56:49,498
- Hey, if there's anything else
- I can get for you...
- 1130
- 00:56:49,529 --> 00:56:51,511
- Seriously, anything. More wine...
- 1131
- 00:56:51,542 --> 00:56:54,576
- Anything, honestly,
- just, just... just let me know.
- 1132
- 00:56:54,607 --> 00:56:55,660
- OK, thanks, Jack.
- 1133
- 00:56:57,527 --> 00:56:59,633
- I love what's left of your top.
- 1134
- 00:57:00,561 --> 00:57:01,677
- Ha!
- 1135
- 00:57:03,668 --> 00:57:05,535
- So, what's your deal, man?
- 1136
- 00:57:05,566 --> 00:57:07,558
- I don't know.
- 1137
- 00:57:07,683 --> 00:57:10,603
- She makes me so nervous. Can you tell?
- 1138
- 00:57:11,551 --> 00:57:12,658
- Yeah.
- 1139
- 00:57:16,526 --> 00:57:18,737
- Get Outta My Dreams, Get Into My Car
- 1140
- 00:57:20,666 --> 00:57:21,740
- <i>♪ Get into my...</i>
- 1141
- 00:57:25,619 --> 00:57:26,724
- I know this one.
- 1142
- 00:57:27,506 --> 00:57:28,674
- - No, Mom.
- - I know this one.
- 1143
- 00:57:28,705 --> 00:57:30,696
- Get it!
- 1144
- 00:57:30,728 --> 00:57:33,606
- Apache
- 1145
- 00:57:40,759 --> 00:57:42,688
- - Your mom can dance?
- - I guess so.
- 1146
- 00:57:43,595 --> 00:57:47,526
- <i>♪ Tonto, jump on it,</i>
- <i>jump on it, jump on it</i>
- 1147
- 00:57:51,604 --> 00:57:55,587
- <i>♪ Kemosabe, jump on it,</i>
- <i>jump on it, jump on it</i>
- 1148
- 00:57:55,618 --> 00:57:56,734
- Whoo!
- 1149
- 00:58:00,582 --> 00:58:03,741
- <i>♪ Custer, jump on it,</i>
- <i>jump on it, jump on it</i>
- 1150
- 00:58:08,673 --> 00:58:11,624
- <i>♪ Apache, jump on it, jump on it</i>
- 1151
- 00:58:14,679 --> 00:58:15,795
- <i>♪ A-hunga-hunga-hunga-hunga</i>
- 1152
- 00:58:16,577 --> 00:58:17,651
- It's a car!
- 1153
- 00:58:17,682 --> 00:58:20,602
- Yeah, I can see that. Yes, Mom!
- 1154
- 00:58:20,633 --> 00:58:21,718
- What a woman!
- 1155
- 00:58:21,749 --> 00:58:24,680
- - You're doing so well!
- - I'm so hot.
- 1156
- 00:58:24,711 --> 00:58:26,619
- You know so many moves!
- 1157
- 00:58:26,786 --> 00:58:28,777
- Get back in there. Go get her!
- 1158
- 00:58:29,643 --> 00:58:30,779
- <i>♪ Jump on it</i>
- 1159
- 00:58:32,625 --> 00:58:33,761
- Boo!
- 1160
- 00:58:33,793 --> 00:58:35,586
- I got hair hit.
- 1161
- 00:58:35,659 --> 00:58:37,630
- <i>♪ Jump on it, jump on it</i>
- 1162
- 00:58:44,804 --> 00:58:46,681
- I'm good!
- 1163
- 00:58:51,717 --> 00:58:52,822
- I'm so happy you're here.
- 1164
- 00:58:53,604 --> 00:58:54,741
- I am too, honey!
- 1165
- 00:58:56,785 --> 00:58:58,599
- OK.
- 1166
- 00:59:02,666 --> 00:59:05,669
- Hi! You need some friends
- and some vitamin D.
- 1167
- 00:59:05,701 --> 00:59:07,807
- OK, pal. Sunscreen's on my desk.
- 1168
- 00:59:09,663 --> 00:59:11,790
- Thank you, best friend.
- 1169
- 00:59:12,801 --> 00:59:13,844
- Come on, girls!
- 1170
- 00:59:14,731 --> 00:59:16,639
- This is our moment!
- 1171
- 00:59:19,829 --> 00:59:21,675
- - Hi, Deanna!
- - Hi, guys!
- 1172
- 00:59:21,706 --> 00:59:23,771
- Rebecca, I'll see you in lab.
- 1173
- 00:59:23,802 --> 00:59:25,689
- - There she is.
- - Hey!
- 1174
- 00:59:25,856 --> 00:59:27,796
- Whoo!
- 1175
- 00:59:27,827 --> 00:59:29,693
- No legs!
- 1176
- 00:59:39,788 --> 00:59:41,644
- Yes!
- 1177
- 00:59:44,709 --> 00:59:45,835
- Hey, Dee!
- 1178
- 00:59:46,857 --> 00:59:48,734
- Have a good day.
- 1179
- 00:59:49,652 --> 00:59:51,675
- Bye, Jack.
- 1180
- 00:59:59,787 --> 01:00:01,664
- Ssh. Be careful.
- 1181
- 01:00:01,695 --> 01:00:02,811
- I can't see out of my holes!
- 1182
- 01:00:02,842 --> 01:00:04,802
- Guys, why did I have to do this?
- 1183
- 01:00:04,834 --> 01:00:06,846
- Just hold her up,
- so we can get her head in there.
- 1184
- 01:00:09,693 --> 01:00:11,883
- - My God!
- - Aw, kidnapping?
- 1185
- 01:00:11,915 --> 01:00:13,844
- - No! Leonor!
- - Come on.
- 1186
- 01:00:13,875 --> 01:00:14,918
- No!
- 1187
- 01:00:17,806 --> 01:00:18,859
- Hello?
- 1188
- 01:00:19,777 --> 01:00:21,800
- Is there....
- 1189
- 01:00:23,708 --> 01:00:26,700
- <i>Deanna Miles,</i>
- <i>welcome to your trial by fire.</i>
- 1190
- 01:00:26,857 --> 01:00:30,694
- What is that device
- that's making your voice so strange?
- 1191
- 01:00:30,725 --> 01:00:31,830
- <i>It's a voice modulator!</i>
- 1192
- 01:00:31,862 --> 01:00:33,759
- <i>Everybody, take off your masks.</i>
- 1193
- 01:00:35,918 --> 01:00:38,764
- My face got so hot under there.
- 1194
- 01:00:38,796 --> 01:00:41,747
- God, Debbie,
- what's wrong with your face?
- 1195
- 01:00:41,778 --> 01:00:42,936
- I'm allergic to latex.
- 1196
- 01:00:43,717 --> 01:00:44,938
- Then why would you put the mask on?
- 1197
- 01:00:45,719 --> 01:00:47,889
- I just wanted to be a team player.
- 1198
- 01:00:48,775 --> 01:00:53,718
- Deanna Miles, are you ready to become
- an honorary member of Theta Mu Gamma?
- 1199
- 01:00:54,948 --> 01:00:57,868
- Really? Is that what this is about?
- 1200
- 01:00:57,899 --> 01:00:59,849
- Wow, ladies! I mean, as long as it's...
- 1201
- 01:00:59,880 --> 01:01:01,809
- Is that OK with Maddie?
- 1202
- 01:01:01,841 --> 01:01:03,801
- It was my idea, Mom.
- 1203
- 01:01:05,772 --> 01:01:07,857
- Maddie Miles, please untie your mother.
- 1204
- 01:01:08,733 --> 01:01:10,797
- Am I supposed to act scared
- or anything or can I...
- 1205
- 01:01:10,829 --> 01:01:11,861
- - No.
- - OK.
- 1206
- 01:01:11,892 --> 01:01:12,935
- - Just be yourself.
- - OK.
- 1207
- 01:01:12,966 --> 01:01:14,801
- Thank you, honey.
- 1208
- 01:01:15,907 --> 01:01:18,868
- Linda, please bring forth the candle.
- 1209
- 01:01:18,900 --> 01:01:20,745
- Where's Linda?
- 1210
- 01:01:21,872 --> 01:01:24,812
- - Welcome.
- - Thank you, Linda.
- 1211
- 01:01:24,844 --> 01:01:28,921
- Now you will be presented
- with the sacred paddle.
- 1212
- 01:01:28,952 --> 01:01:31,809
- Welcome, Dee Rock.
- 1213
- 01:01:32,810 --> 01:01:33,967
- Carol, my...your brushwork
- 1214
- 01:01:33,999 --> 01:01:36,804
- is absolutely lovely.
- 1215
- 01:01:36,835 --> 01:01:38,910
- They're actually just stickers, but...
- 1216
- 01:01:38,941 --> 01:01:42,903
- Maddie, please spank your mother
- with the ceremonial paddle.
- 1217
- 01:01:43,779 --> 01:01:45,990
- No, I'm not... I'm not paddling my mother.
- 1218
- 01:01:46,772 --> 01:01:47,856
- Come on, Maddie.
- 1219
- 01:01:47,888 --> 01:01:48,920
- Maddie, team player!
- 1220
- 01:01:48,951 --> 01:01:52,934
- You know what? I have to ask.
- Has everybody else been paddled?
- 1221
- 01:01:52,965 --> 01:01:55,791
- Because I don't wanna be
- the stick in the mud.
- 1222
- 01:01:55,823 --> 01:01:58,889
- Should I crouch? I'm assuming
- I should take a crouched position.
- 1223
- 01:01:58,920 --> 01:02:00,005
- I crouched.
- 1224
- 01:02:00,787 --> 01:02:02,966
- I want the full Greek experience
- because I've always wondered...
- 1225
- 01:02:07,836 --> 01:02:08,951
- God, that hit bone!
- 1226
- 01:02:08,982 --> 01:02:10,025
- - Mom.
- - Maddie!
- 1227
- 01:02:10,807 --> 01:02:12,027
- I'm sorry.
- 1228
- 01:02:12,809 --> 01:02:13,883
- Mom.
- 1229
- 01:02:13,915 --> 01:02:15,041
- Is someone still hitting me?
- 1230
- 01:02:15,823 --> 01:02:18,805
- - I'm not touching you!
- - I feel it!
- 1231
- 01:02:18,836 --> 01:02:21,923
- They're like phantom pains
- except they're real!
- 1232
- 01:02:23,028 --> 01:02:24,905
- Get off of me!
- 1233
- 01:02:25,947 --> 01:02:27,814
- God.
- 1234
- 01:02:27,960 --> 01:02:29,951
- I thought I was gonna vomit.
- 1235
- 01:02:30,953 --> 01:02:31,975
- No.
- 1236
- 01:02:32,006 --> 01:02:33,915
- I'm sorry...
- 1237
- 01:02:33,946 --> 01:02:36,855
- if I may have raised my voice.
- 1238
- 01:02:36,886 --> 01:02:39,024
- - Are you OK, Dee Rock?
- - It's like when you stub a toe.
- 1239
- 01:02:39,055 --> 01:02:41,902
- You just... You skyrocket
- 1240
- 01:02:41,933 --> 01:02:46,020
- and then 30 seconds later,
- you didn't lose the toe,
- 1241
- 01:02:46,052 --> 01:02:48,846
- which you swore 30 seconds earlier...
- 1242
- 01:02:48,878 --> 01:02:49,983
- "I'm gonna lose the toe."
- 1243
- 01:02:50,014 --> 01:02:53,069
- Right? We've all been at that bedpost.
- 1244
- 01:02:53,851 --> 01:02:55,895
- - Are you ready to continue?
- - I'd love to.
- 1245
- 01:02:55,926 --> 01:02:56,948
- All right.
- 1246
- 01:02:56,979 --> 01:03:01,015
- By the power vested in me by
- this great state and educational facility,
- 1247
- 01:03:01,046 --> 01:03:04,967
- I declare you a member of Theta Mu Gamma.
- 1248
- 01:03:09,076 --> 01:03:10,921
- My gosh!
- 1249
- 01:03:10,953 --> 01:03:15,092
- I just wanna say, I mean, pound sign,
- hashtag gratitude.
- 1250
- 01:03:15,874 --> 01:03:16,907
- Right here.
- 1251
- 01:03:16,938 --> 01:03:19,002
- <i>And there's cake upstairs!</i>
- 1252
- 01:03:21,015 --> 01:03:22,068
- Cake!
- 1253
- 01:03:24,112 --> 01:03:25,978
- She's allergic. She...
- 1254
- 01:03:26,009 --> 01:03:27,104
- Honey, you're allergic.
- 1255
- 01:03:27,886 --> 01:03:28,992
- Not tonight!
- 1256
- 01:03:34,038 --> 01:03:35,112
- All right.
- 1257
- 01:03:35,894 --> 01:03:37,886
- Exciting day. Hello to you, class.
- 1258
- 01:03:37,917 --> 01:03:41,098
- I am very much looking forward
- to discovering the treasure
- 1259
- 01:03:41,130 --> 01:03:43,017
- of your mid-term presentations.
- 1260
- 01:03:44,133 --> 01:03:46,906
- - You're not gonna laugh at that?
- - It's funny.
- 1261
- 01:03:46,938 --> 01:03:49,075
- I'm just... I'm too nervous
- about this presentation.
- 1262
- 01:03:49,106 --> 01:03:50,973
- - I can't.
- - OK, tell you what.
- 1263
- 01:03:51,004 --> 01:03:53,997
- Why don't we start off with...
- No offence to the rest of you!
- 1264
- 01:03:54,028 --> 01:03:55,947
- ..my favourite student?
- 1265
- 01:03:55,978 --> 01:03:57,041
- God. I gotta get some air.
- 1266
- 01:03:57,073 --> 01:04:00,086
- Don't worry about it.
- It's me. I'm clearly his favourite.
- 1267
- 01:04:00,117 --> 01:04:01,150
- Excuse me. Sorry.
- 1268
- 01:04:01,932 --> 01:04:04,997
- Deanna Miles,
- would you get us started, please?
- 1269
- 01:04:06,968 --> 01:04:08,084
- God!
- 1270
- 01:04:09,929 --> 01:04:11,045
- I'm um...
- 1271
- 01:04:13,985 --> 01:04:15,133
- - You wanna...
- - No.
- 1272
- 01:04:17,125 --> 01:04:20,159
- - I know you're gonna knock our socks off.
- - Thank you.
- 1273
- 01:04:20,940 --> 01:04:23,100
- Deanna Miles is gonna start us off,
- everybody. Lights.
- 1274
- 01:04:25,988 --> 01:04:27,948
- I didn't expect that.
- 1275
- 01:04:29,043 --> 01:04:30,148
- Hello.
- 1276
- 01:04:32,057 --> 01:04:33,141
- God.
- 1277
- 01:04:33,172 --> 01:04:35,018
- Sorry.
- 1278
- 01:04:42,171 --> 01:04:44,986
- I didn't... Is it a crank?
- 1279
- 01:04:45,017 --> 01:04:46,091
- It's a crank.
- 1280
- 01:04:46,123 --> 01:04:48,125
- I'm sorry, I just need to...
- 1281
- 01:04:50,012 --> 01:04:51,128
- We are gonna...
- 1282
- 01:04:52,182 --> 01:04:55,038
- I'm here to... God!
- 1283
- 01:04:55,070 --> 01:04:56,113
- I'm sorry.
- 1284
- 01:04:57,103 --> 01:04:58,156
- I'm so sorry.
- 1285
- 01:04:58,188 --> 01:05:03,193
- Is it part of the core curriculum
- that I must use the podium?
- 1286
- 01:05:03,975 --> 01:05:05,111
- Of course not. No, not at all.
- 1287
- 01:05:05,143 --> 01:05:10,127
- OK. I'm going to opt
- to not use that.
- 1288
- 01:05:14,058 --> 01:05:15,997
- She's totally pitting out.
- 1289
- 01:05:16,029 --> 01:05:17,186
- She's gonna be fine.
- 1290
- 01:05:21,138 --> 01:05:22,212
- I'm here...
- 1291
- 01:05:22,994 --> 01:05:24,130
- Too loud, too loud.
- 1292
- 01:05:24,162 --> 01:05:26,153
- I'm here to discuss...
- 1293
- 01:05:26,184 --> 01:05:31,012
- not an exciting find
- but rather an exciting truth.
- 1294
- 01:05:32,160 --> 01:05:35,101
- The tomb of Attila the Hun,
- 1295
- 01:05:35,226 --> 01:05:40,137
- thought to be in Budapest, Hungary,
- in 2014,
- 1296
- 01:05:40,168 --> 01:05:42,066
- but was in fact a hoax.
- 1297
- 01:05:42,097 --> 01:05:43,255
- But how do we know?
- 1298
- 01:05:45,236 --> 01:05:47,092
- How do we know?
- 1299
- 01:05:47,123 --> 01:05:49,031
- Ms Miles, are you OK?
- 1300
- 01:05:49,063 --> 01:05:51,158
- Yes. I'm fine. Just...
- 1301
- 01:05:51,190 --> 01:05:55,256
- You know what? If I could just maybe
- get into a couple of those tissues...
- 1302
- 01:05:56,038 --> 01:05:57,227
- Of course.
- 1303
- 01:06:01,127 --> 01:06:02,180
- - I'm sorry.
- - No.
- 1304
- 01:06:02,211 --> 01:06:08,145
- You may wanna check with your HVAC guy
- because something's going on in here.
- 1305
- 01:06:11,065 --> 01:06:12,139
- - Thank you.
- - You've got...
- 1306
- 01:06:16,080 --> 01:06:17,237
- Thank you. That's better.
- 1307
- 01:06:19,062 --> 01:06:20,115
- Tissue.
- 1308
- 01:06:21,169 --> 01:06:23,077
- My God.
- 1309
- 01:06:26,059 --> 01:06:27,185
- My God.
- 1310
- 01:06:32,190 --> 01:06:34,098
- Historically...
- 1311
- 01:06:34,129 --> 01:06:36,299
- Historically, the Huns have...
- 1312
- 01:06:39,176 --> 01:06:44,255
- Could I just have a small...
- small sip of water from someone?
- 1313
- 01:06:45,246 --> 01:06:47,112
- Can I... Do you mind if I just...
- 1314
- 01:06:47,143 --> 01:06:49,229
- Thank you so much. Thank you.
- 1315
- 01:06:51,293 --> 01:06:53,212
- Don't be a dick now.
- 1316
- 01:07:01,262 --> 01:07:04,265
- That is surprisingly challenging my body.
- 1317
- 01:07:04,296 --> 01:07:06,340
- - Wayne!
- - Deanna.
- 1318
- 01:07:08,237 --> 01:07:10,156
- Girl.
- 1319
- 01:07:12,116 --> 01:07:14,212
- I think it's OK now.
- 1320
- 01:07:16,236 --> 01:07:18,143
- So sorry for that.
- 1321
- 01:07:19,301 --> 01:07:23,337
- Rümschtein discovered a tomb,
- 1322
- 01:07:24,119 --> 01:07:28,238
- - allegedly that had many human...
- - skeletons,
- 1323
- 01:07:28,269 --> 01:07:32,252
- and many various
- different kinds of horse skeletons,
- 1324
- 01:07:33,253 --> 01:07:35,182
- ie, carcasses,
- 1325
- 01:07:36,277 --> 01:07:39,321
- to enable them to come into
- the next dimension.
- 1326
- 01:07:40,322 --> 01:07:42,283
- Are there any questions...?
- 1327
- 01:07:44,326 --> 01:07:46,349
- - Deanna?
- - No. OK...
- 1328
- 01:07:47,309 --> 01:07:49,144
- Ms Miles! Ms Miles!
- 1329
- 01:07:49,175 --> 01:07:50,218
- Dee Rock!
- 1330
- 01:07:51,282 --> 01:07:53,200
- How did I do?
- 1331
- 01:07:53,232 --> 01:07:55,338
- Girl, you sweat through your pants.
- 1332
- 01:07:55,370 --> 01:07:58,394
- No. I love these pants.
- 1333
- 01:08:04,306 --> 01:08:07,319
- It was the first time I've taken a look
- at his entire portfolio.
- 1334
- 01:08:07,350 --> 01:08:14,170
- And I looked at him and I said,
- "Tom, your 401 is 401 not OK."
- 1335
- 01:08:15,265 --> 01:08:16,307
- Interesting.
- 1336
- 01:08:16,339 --> 01:08:18,247
- Sounds like a really exciting business.
- 1337
- 01:08:18,278 --> 01:08:20,197
- I'm glad to see you.
- 1338
- 01:08:20,228 --> 01:08:22,209
- - Yeah, me, too.
- - I'm glad you called me.
- 1339
- 01:08:22,240 --> 01:08:24,253
- You're being quiet tonight. What is it?
- 1340
- 01:08:24,284 --> 01:08:27,340
- No, I'm enjoying the wine,
- and the neat banter.
- 1341
- 01:08:27,371 --> 01:08:30,333
- My God.
- We're too old and boring for you now.
- 1342
- 01:08:30,364 --> 01:08:33,252
- - Don't say that. That's not true.
- - I knew it. Don't dump me.
- 1343
- 01:08:33,284 --> 01:08:34,431
- - I'm not gonna dump you.
- - I mean it.
- 1344
- 01:08:35,213 --> 01:08:38,226
- I will leave Frank. In a heartbeat.
- 1345
- 01:08:38,257 --> 01:08:41,260
- I don't give two rats' asses
- about Amy and Bill.
- 1346
- 01:08:41,427 --> 01:08:44,243
- - Excuse me?
- - Your jokes make me wanna kill myself.
- 1347
- 01:08:44,274 --> 01:08:45,358
- They're not very good.
- 1348
- 01:08:45,389 --> 01:08:46,443
- No, they're the worst.
- 1349
- 01:08:47,225 --> 01:08:48,361
- That's... That's fair.
- 1350
- 01:08:49,216 --> 01:08:52,240
- - My God.
- - My God.
- 1351
- 01:08:52,271 --> 01:08:54,273
- - Those pricks are here.
- - Who?
- 1352
- 01:08:54,305 --> 01:08:56,255
- - They can't see me.
- - Where are you going?
- 1353
- 01:08:56,286 --> 01:08:59,247
- - What are you doing?
- - Maybe they're going the other...
- 1354
- 01:08:59,436 --> 01:09:02,334
- I can't believe...
- I did not know they were gonna be here.
- 1355
- 01:09:03,282 --> 01:09:05,390
- - Well...
- - Here it is. Found my contact.
- 1356
- 01:09:05,421 --> 01:09:07,402
- - Hey, gang. What's the good word?
- - Hi!
- 1357
- 01:09:10,238 --> 01:09:12,282
- What a surprise!
- I didn't know you were here.
- 1358
- 01:09:12,313 --> 01:09:13,460
- - You guys know Marcie, right?
- - Yeah.
- 1359
- 01:09:14,242 --> 01:09:16,244
- - I don't think I introduced you.
- - Hi. Hello.
- 1360
- 01:09:16,276 --> 01:09:17,443
- Pleasure. It's great.
- 1361
- 01:09:17,475 --> 01:09:22,240
- What is... What is on your lobe, Dan?
- 1362
- 01:09:22,407 --> 01:09:24,471
- It's an earring.
- It works for Harrison Ford.
- 1363
- 01:09:25,253 --> 01:09:26,275
- Sure does.
- 1364
- 01:09:26,306 --> 01:09:28,475
- Harrison Ford blew up the Death Star
- and freed a galaxy.
- 1365
- 01:09:29,257 --> 01:09:30,300
- What have you done, Dan?
- 1366
- 01:09:30,331 --> 01:09:33,449
- Six-minute abs. He completed
- the 30-day challenge of six-minute abs.
- 1367
- 01:09:33,480 --> 01:09:35,399
- My goal is to have a washboard.
- 1368
- 01:09:35,430 --> 01:09:38,486
- Now, Deanna, what are you up to?
- You still pretending to go to college?
- 1369
- 01:09:39,267 --> 01:09:41,406
- Because you know,
- Dan can't foot that bill forever.
- 1370
- 01:09:41,437 --> 01:09:45,274
- What was the word we learned in Italy
- for "pathetic"?
- 1371
- 01:09:45,306 --> 01:09:48,267
- - I don't remember any more.
- - I do. It was Deanna.
- 1372
- 01:09:48,298 --> 01:09:50,488
- Pathetico in Italian. Pathetic, pathetico.
- 1373
- 01:09:51,270 --> 01:09:57,297
- Bill, you look like Orson Welles
- had a stroke and stayed that way.
- 1374
- 01:09:57,328 --> 01:09:59,330
- Not the first time I've heard it.
- 1375
- 01:09:59,361 --> 01:10:02,458
- God, I hate him so much.
- I hate him so much.
- 1376
- 01:10:02,489 --> 01:10:04,387
- He's hateable.
- 1377
- 01:10:04,418 --> 01:10:07,317
- Deanna, I wanted to speak to you
- privately for a second.
- 1378
- 01:10:07,348 --> 01:10:12,291
- No. I don't have any time for you and I
- will never have any time for you again.
- 1379
- 01:10:12,322 --> 01:10:16,379
- Fine. I was going to say,
- Marcie and I have some big news.
- 1380
- 01:10:16,504 --> 01:10:18,381
- We're getting married next week.
- 1381
- 01:10:18,413 --> 01:10:20,404
- Small ceremony but super classy.
- 1382
- 01:10:20,435 --> 01:10:21,468
- Mazel tov!
- 1383
- 01:10:21,499 --> 01:10:23,490
- Shut up, Bill!
- 1384
- 01:10:23,522 --> 01:10:25,440
- What the hell is wrong with you?
- 1385
- 01:10:25,472 --> 01:10:29,371
- They said they were getting married.
- We should... Mazel tov!
- 1386
- 01:10:29,403 --> 01:10:31,457
- Read the room, Bill.
- 1387
- 01:10:31,488 --> 01:10:33,375
- Thank you. That was very kind.
- 1388
- 01:10:33,407 --> 01:10:34,554
- I'm not Jewish, but thank you.
- 1389
- 01:10:35,336 --> 01:10:36,441
- This is a bona fide shit show.
- 1390
- 01:10:36,472 --> 01:10:38,391
- Jeez.
- 1391
- 01:10:38,422 --> 01:10:40,403
- I was hoping for a "congratulations".
- 1392
- 01:10:40,435 --> 01:10:42,364
- Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.
- 1393
- 01:10:42,395 --> 01:10:45,325
- - Can I get you any starters, appetisers?
- - Jack!
- 1394
- 01:10:46,368 --> 01:10:47,421
- - What...?
- - Deanna.
- 1395
- 01:10:47,452 --> 01:10:51,436
- Wow, you look...stunning.
- 1396
- 01:10:51,467 --> 01:10:53,438
- I don't know.
- 1397
- 01:10:53,469 --> 01:10:56,514
- - Um...this is my mom.
- - What?
- 1398
- 01:10:56,545 --> 01:10:58,558
- Mom, this is who I was telling you about.
- The girl.
- 1399
- 01:10:59,340 --> 01:11:00,362
- - No.
- - What?
- 1400
- 01:11:00,393 --> 01:11:02,499
- - No!
- - What am I hearing?
- 1401
- 01:11:02,530 --> 01:11:03,563
- What's happening?
- 1402
- 01:11:04,345 --> 01:11:08,453
- Jack, you told me you were seeing
- a college girl named Dee Dee.
- 1403
- 01:11:08,484 --> 01:11:12,415
- Yeah, she came to the frat house
- and we met at a party.
- 1404
- 01:11:13,375 --> 01:11:15,491
- That's not what you meant.
- 1405
- 01:11:15,523 --> 01:11:16,576
- Gosh!
- 1406
- 01:11:17,358 --> 01:11:19,495
- She had sex with your son!
- 1407
- 01:11:19,527 --> 01:11:22,363
- She had sex with your son
- and she called me right after.
- 1408
- 01:11:22,394 --> 01:11:23,594
- Because we are friends!
- 1409
- 01:11:24,375 --> 01:11:26,441
- My goodness!
- 1410
- 01:11:26,472 --> 01:11:30,601
- Everybody, she slept with her son
- in a library!
- 1411
- 01:11:33,417 --> 01:11:35,533
- This is the greatest thing
- I've ever been a part of.
- 1412
- 01:11:35,564 --> 01:11:36,576
- - I get it.
- - Cheers.
- 1413
- 01:11:36,607 --> 01:11:39,496
- It's just a cruel joke.
- It's cruel, and you're right.
- 1414
- 01:11:39,527 --> 01:11:42,540
- You know what? I might deserve it.
- I've been rough on you, but come on,
- 1415
- 01:11:42,571 --> 01:11:46,534
- seriously, did you have intercourse
- with my son?
- 1416
- 01:11:47,524 --> 01:11:49,422
- Did you?
- 1417
- 01:11:51,601 --> 01:11:57,399
- In terms of your question of like,
- did anything happen between us?
- 1418
- 01:11:57,430 --> 01:11:59,432
- Have we slept together?
- 1419
- 01:11:59,463 --> 01:12:01,623
- Yeah. Yeah, we have.
- 1420
- 01:12:02,404 --> 01:12:04,532
- And I rocked...his world.
- 1421
- 01:12:04,563 --> 01:12:06,482
- - My God!
- - Come on.
- 1422
- 01:12:06,513 --> 01:12:09,422
- Well, best night of my life.
- 1423
- 01:12:09,558 --> 01:12:11,435
- I'll drink to that.
- 1424
- 01:12:12,592 --> 01:12:14,500
- All right. Bye, Jack.
- 1425
- 01:12:15,512 --> 01:12:20,444
- Whoa! That's my girl! That's my lady!
- 1426
- 01:12:21,518 --> 01:12:22,665
- Nice to finally meet you, Jack.
- 1427
- 01:12:23,447 --> 01:12:25,428
- I love you!
- 1428
- 01:12:25,459 --> 01:12:28,618
- I love you! You're my hero! Whoa!
- 1429
- 01:12:28,650 --> 01:12:31,517
- I need... I'm gonna check on Dee Dee.
- 1430
- 01:12:36,376 --> 01:12:37,535
- - Dee Rock!
- - Dee!
- 1431
- 01:12:38,316 --> 01:12:39,495
- Dee, where are you? There she is!
- 1432
- 01:12:39,526 --> 01:12:41,518
- - Hi! How are you?
- - I heard you had sex in here!
- 1433
- 01:12:41,549 --> 01:12:44,385
- - So good to see you.
- - My God, you guys. Ssh.
- 1434
- 01:12:44,417 --> 01:12:47,399
- - What are you doing here?
- - We're here to get you out of here.
- 1435
- 01:12:47,430 --> 01:12:48,525
- No. Why?
- 1436
- 01:12:48,556 --> 01:12:51,392
- Your ding-dong ex-husband's
- getting married tonight.
- 1437
- 01:12:51,424 --> 01:12:53,530
- You were here for our girl
- when she was freaking out.
- 1438
- 01:12:53,561 --> 01:12:55,438
- You've been there for all of us.
- 1439
- 01:12:55,469 --> 01:12:57,367
- Let us be there for you.
- 1440
- 01:12:57,398 --> 01:13:00,454
- My friend Lance who I was in a coma
- with is having a gathering this evening.
- 1441
- 01:13:00,485 --> 01:13:02,518
- His place is kind of a dump,
- but it'll be fun!
- 1442
- 01:13:02,549 --> 01:13:05,406
- No. You know what?
- I'm pretty much partied out.
- 1443
- 01:13:05,438 --> 01:13:07,388
- I just wanna stay in for the night
- 1444
- 01:13:07,419 --> 01:13:08,482
- - and hit the books.
- - Please!
- 1445
- 01:13:08,514 --> 01:13:10,589
- I'm sorry, Dee. I'm sorry.
- I'm not taking this.
- 1446
- 01:13:11,371 --> 01:13:12,571
- You should not be alone tonight, so...
- 1447
- 01:13:13,352 --> 01:13:15,354
- - No!
- - I'm afraid you don't have an option.
- 1448
- 01:13:15,385 --> 01:13:17,586
- Yeah, this is not like those
- other parties. It's jazz night!
- 1449
- 01:13:18,483 --> 01:13:20,391
- OK. You know what?
- 1450
- 01:13:20,422 --> 01:13:22,383
- You're right. If I stay here any longer,
- 1451
- 01:13:22,414 --> 01:13:24,468
- I'm just gonna keep thinking
- about that wedding.
- 1452
- 01:13:24,499 --> 01:13:27,429
- Yeah, she's probably getting her dress on.
- 1453
- 01:13:27,461 --> 01:13:29,421
- Hair and make-up, going over her vows.
- 1454
- 01:13:29,452 --> 01:13:31,517
- OK, you know what? Let's just go.
- 1455
- 01:13:31,548 --> 01:13:33,540
- Yeah!
- 1456
- 01:13:33,571 --> 01:13:35,448
- No! No!
- 1457
- 01:13:37,377 --> 01:13:41,610
- You know, Lance, I have to say, you know,
- you have a lovely, lovely home here.
- 1458
- 01:13:42,392 --> 01:13:43,529
- Are you sure tonight is a party?
- 1459
- 01:13:43,560 --> 01:13:45,614
- Sorry. Lance, what's going on?
- Where is everybody?
- 1460
- 01:13:46,396 --> 01:13:47,564
- - You promised me a jazz party.
- - I know.
- 1461
- 01:13:47,595 --> 01:13:50,610
- You got people doing role-playing games.
- And Tuesday night is jazz.
- 1462
- 01:13:51,391 --> 01:13:53,519
- - Thursday night is role-playing.
- - I know. It's my bad.
- 1463
- 01:13:53,550 --> 01:13:56,449
- I tried to combine them
- and I'm regretting that choice now
- 1464
- 01:13:56,480 --> 01:13:58,472
- because I feel like
- I'm losing the jazz crowd
- 1465
- 01:13:58,503 --> 01:14:00,463
- and I've also lost the role-playing crowd.
- 1466
- 01:14:00,495 --> 01:14:02,445
- Taking a ding on both sides.
- 1467
- 01:14:02,476 --> 01:14:03,633
- Yeah, it's like a double loss, really.
- 1468
- 01:14:04,415 --> 01:14:06,490
- You know what?
- I'm having a wonderful time
- 1469
- 01:14:06,522 --> 01:14:11,631
- and I have to say, I cannot
- stay out of this unbelievable choc...
- 1470
- 01:14:12,413 --> 01:14:14,519
- You are quite a gifted chocolatier.
- I mean...
- 1471
- 01:14:14,550 --> 01:14:17,491
- - They're really good.
- - I don't usually like chocolate.
- 1472
- 01:14:17,522 --> 01:14:20,525
- I just started eating because
- I was nervous but it's really good.
- 1473
- 01:14:20,556 --> 01:14:22,506
- It is a weed bark. So, maybe...
- 1474
- 01:14:22,538 --> 01:14:24,603
- I would probably hold off
- from having any more.
- 1475
- 01:14:25,625 --> 01:14:27,428
- - Just cos...
- - What is it?
- 1476
- 01:14:27,459 --> 01:14:31,485
- I have a medicinal marijuana card
- for early-onset glaucoma.
- 1477
- 01:14:32,434 --> 01:14:33,591
- - No.
- - Yeah.
- 1478
- 01:14:33,622 --> 01:14:35,656
- - No, it's not.
- - No, it most certainly is.
- 1479
- 01:14:36,438 --> 01:14:39,566
- Lance, damn it! Why'd you put out
- chocolate weed bark? You gotta label that.
- 1480
- 01:14:39,597 --> 01:14:41,464
- I am so sorry. It is...
- 1481
- 01:14:41,495 --> 01:14:44,540
- I've had 14. I've eaten a lot of bark.
- 1482
- 01:14:44,571 --> 01:14:46,542
- - I've eaten a lot of bark too.
- - So much bark.
- 1483
- 01:14:46,573 --> 01:14:48,450
- So much bark.
- 1484
- 01:14:48,481 --> 01:14:50,608
- I just wanted to hear some Miles Davis,
- you know.
- 1485
- 01:14:50,639 --> 01:14:52,485
- I'm sorry.
- 1486
- 01:14:52,683 --> 01:14:56,625
- Is that it? Because I'm starting
- to feel a little fungly.
- 1487
- 01:14:56,656 --> 01:14:58,595
- Yeah, it's pretty powerful stuff.
- 1488
- 01:14:58,627 --> 01:15:01,641
- Fungly. Fun-Fungle. Fungl-y.
- 1489
- 01:15:01,672 --> 01:15:04,476
- You have such pretty eyes.
- 1490
- 01:15:06,521 --> 01:15:08,533
- Thank you.
- 1491
- 01:15:10,535 --> 01:15:12,527
- My tongue is so big.
- 1492
- 01:15:17,501 --> 01:15:20,566
- ♪ The final countdown!
- 1493
- 01:15:20,598 --> 01:15:22,683
- That was recognisable.
- 1494
- 01:15:22,714 --> 01:15:24,727
- Really good jam. I'm just gonna...
- 1495
- 01:15:25,509 --> 01:15:26,604
- - Can I get in here?
- - Please.
- 1496
- 01:15:26,635 --> 01:15:27,688
- It's so comfy.
- 1497
- 01:15:27,719 --> 01:15:29,669
- OK, wait. I...
- 1498
- 01:15:29,700 --> 01:15:31,629
- was thinking about something...
- 1499
- 01:15:31,661 --> 01:15:34,601
- and if I do marry Jack...
- 1500
- 01:15:34,632 --> 01:15:36,582
- No! Just listen. Wait, wait.
- 1501
- 01:15:36,614 --> 01:15:39,638
- That would make Marcie my stepmom...
- 1502
- 01:15:39,670 --> 01:15:43,549
- and that would make Dan my new stepdad.
- 1503
- 01:15:43,580 --> 01:15:48,564
- And then I would have to say things like,
- "Nuh-Dan. You're not my real dad.
- 1504
- 01:15:48,595 --> 01:15:49,700
- You can't tell me what to do.
- 1505
- 01:15:49,732 --> 01:15:51,702
- Give me the car!"
- 1506
- 01:15:53,611 --> 01:15:55,706
- Or, wait a minute... Or...
- 1507
- 01:15:55,738 --> 01:15:57,656
- I could flip it.
- 1508
- 01:15:58,584 --> 01:15:59,763
- And I could make peace with Dan.
- 1509
- 01:16:00,545 --> 01:16:03,714
- What a great teaching lesson,
- right, that would be for Maddie
- 1510
- 01:16:03,746 --> 01:16:07,635
- to see forgiveness
- and truly being the better person.
- 1511
- 01:16:07,666 --> 01:16:09,648
- - That's better.
- - You're so smart.
- 1512
- 01:16:09,679 --> 01:16:11,629
- You gotta go to that wedding.
- 1513
- 01:16:12,683 --> 01:16:13,736
- Are we doing it?
- 1514
- 01:16:13,767 --> 01:16:15,780
- My God. We're doing it!
- 1515
- 01:16:18,730 --> 01:16:24,674
- Dan, when I first saw you,
- I thought the kerb appeal wasn't great,
- 1516
- 01:16:25,685 --> 01:16:27,687
- the layout was a bit dated
- 1517
- 01:16:27,719 --> 01:16:30,690
- and the kitchen a little small
- for my liking.
- 1518
- 01:16:30,722 --> 01:16:32,682
- Dee Rock, good for you.
- 1519
- 01:16:32,713 --> 01:16:34,590
- You're being the better person.
- 1520
- 01:16:34,621 --> 01:16:35,737
- Thank you. That's the whole plan.
- 1521
- 01:16:35,768 --> 01:16:37,760
- I'm gonna see Dan,
- I'm gonna shake his hand,
- 1522
- 01:16:37,791 --> 01:16:40,805
- I'm gonna extend
- an olive branch to him and...
- 1523
- 01:16:41,587 --> 01:16:45,601
- What? He... He's taking her name!
- 1524
- 01:16:45,632 --> 01:16:46,675
- Who does...
- 1525
- 01:16:46,706 --> 01:16:48,782
- Men don't do that.
- 1526
- 01:16:48,814 --> 01:16:52,672
- I tried to do that
- and he told me it was silly.
- 1527
- 01:16:54,788 --> 01:16:57,614
- That is a very alarming picture.
- 1528
- 01:16:57,645 --> 01:16:59,741
- Hey! I mean, is...
- 1529
- 01:16:59,772 --> 01:17:01,608
- Is that a shot at me?
- 1530
- 01:17:01,639 --> 01:17:02,713
- - ...yeah.
- - I think so.
- 1531
- 01:17:12,681 --> 01:17:14,777
- You know what?
- Dan just lost his olive branch.
- 1532
- 01:17:15,705 --> 01:17:17,770
- Throw It Down
- 1533
- 01:17:19,845 --> 01:17:22,650
- ♪ Like the way I work it
- Then I bend it over show 'em shots
- 1534
- 01:17:22,681 --> 01:17:24,620
- ♪ All these hoes around here
- sitting on they ass shots
- 1535
- 01:17:24,652 --> 01:17:27,812
- ♪ He think he finna hit it like the way
- he rocks his fitted when he's round
- 1536
- 01:17:27,843 --> 01:17:29,720
- ♪ Don't make me throw it down
- 1537
- 01:17:32,681 --> 01:17:33,807
- ♪ Don't make me throw it down
- 1538
- 01:17:36,685 --> 01:17:37,718
- ♪ Throw it down
- 1539
- 01:17:40,814 --> 01:17:41,826
- ♪ Down
- 1540
- 01:17:45,674 --> 01:17:46,810
- ♪ D-Down
- 1541
- 01:17:58,655 --> 01:17:59,677
- ♪ Down
- 1542
- 01:18:02,754 --> 01:18:04,777
- ♪ Down
- 1543
- 01:18:09,678 --> 01:18:10,793
- One second.
- 1544
- 01:18:13,744 --> 01:18:15,798
- Deanna, what the hell is wrong with you?
- 1545
- 01:18:15,830 --> 01:18:17,696
- My God!
- 1546
- 01:18:17,832 --> 01:18:18,885
- My God!
- 1547
- 01:18:19,834 --> 01:18:22,691
- Hey, Dan.
- 1548
- 01:18:23,879 --> 01:18:26,757
- Marcie... You're...
- 1549
- 01:18:26,789 --> 01:18:28,822
- a big Beetlejuice fan?
- 1550
- 01:18:28,853 --> 01:18:30,699
- Mom!
- 1551
- 01:18:30,824 --> 01:18:33,764
- Hey, honey. That's...
- 1552
- 01:18:34,850 --> 01:18:38,843
- I think we may have
- just gotten slightly...
- 1553
- 01:18:38,874 --> 01:18:42,878
- You know, I think... I think
- if we all kind of work together...
- 1554
- 01:18:42,910 --> 01:18:45,788
- we can have this shipshape and...
- 1555
- 01:18:45,819 --> 01:18:48,739
- you won't even know,
- or it will be better.
- 1556
- 01:18:48,770 --> 01:18:50,897
- - Mom, why did you do this?
- - Um...
- 1557
- 01:18:50,928 --> 01:18:54,849
- You know, it's a great um...question.
- 1558
- 01:18:54,880 --> 01:18:57,716
- I mean, I actually came here...
- 1559
- 01:18:57,748 --> 01:19:00,730
- fully with the intention
- of offering an olive branch.
- 1560
- 01:19:00,761 --> 01:19:04,744
- Then I don't know if it was the crazy
- wedding propaganda in the hallway
- 1561
- 01:19:04,775 --> 01:19:07,957
- or, you know, was it
- the bark high that I'm on?
- 1562
- 01:19:08,738 --> 01:19:12,951
- Shut up. You are, as of this moment,
- completely financially cut off.
- 1563
- 01:19:13,732 --> 01:19:16,788
- - What?
- - Not one more penny for you.
- 1564
- 01:19:16,903 --> 01:19:18,863
- - Dad.
- - Ssh.
- 1565
- 01:19:19,812 --> 01:19:20,928
- Would it help if I just...
- 1566
- 01:19:20,959 --> 01:19:22,847
- You know, you...
- 1567
- 01:19:22,878 --> 01:19:24,765
- You did a good job.
- 1568
- 01:19:24,796 --> 01:19:25,922
- - It looks good.
- - It did.
- 1569
- 01:19:25,954 --> 01:19:27,966
- - It did look good.
- - It was pretty.
- 1570
- 01:19:28,748 --> 01:19:30,907
- - I think you all should leave.
- - OK.
- 1571
- 01:19:36,777 --> 01:19:37,976
- The other way.
- 1572
- 01:19:43,952 --> 01:19:45,880
- Get out!
- 1573
- 01:19:46,808 --> 01:19:47,914
- Thank you.
- 1574
- 01:19:48,874 --> 01:19:50,823
- The cake was really good.
- 1575
- 01:19:50,855 --> 01:19:52,867
- You got a blender.
- 1576
- 01:20:03,795 --> 01:20:06,996
- Hey! Look! I got your favourite.
- 1577
- 01:20:08,831 --> 01:20:10,833
- You haven't been returning
- any of my calls.
- 1578
- 01:20:10,864 --> 01:20:13,023
- Yeah, I've been pretty busy
- destroying hotel banquet rooms
- 1579
- 01:20:13,805 --> 01:20:15,973
- - and crashing weddings.
- - OK. I get you're upset.
- 1580
- 01:20:16,005 --> 01:20:18,018
- No, Mom. I don't think you do.
- 1581
- 01:20:18,935 --> 01:20:22,012
- Is this why you went back to college?
- So you could act like some dumb frat guy?
- 1582
- 01:20:22,793 --> 01:20:24,879
- Cos I actually thought
- you wanted to learn something.
- 1583
- 01:20:24,911 --> 01:20:27,986
- But you've just been getting stoned
- and sleeping with guys half your age.
- 1584
- 01:20:28,018 --> 01:20:30,989
- OK, Jack is not half my...age.
- 1585
- 01:20:31,021 --> 01:20:34,003
- My God, I think
- he's less than half my age.
- 1586
- 01:20:34,034 --> 01:20:37,048
- OK, I hear you and you're right.
- 1587
- 01:20:37,830 --> 01:20:39,853
- Which is why I'm leaving school.
- 1588
- 01:20:39,884 --> 01:20:41,813
- What?
- 1589
- 01:20:41,886 --> 01:20:43,940
- I'm gonna drop out of school, honey.
- 1590
- 01:20:44,868 --> 01:20:47,913
- You know, it wasn't that easy for me
- getting used to you being here.
- 1591
- 01:20:47,944 --> 01:20:50,050
- And now I actually did
- and you're just giving up?
- 1592
- 01:20:50,832 --> 01:20:52,886
- You said the one thing
- you regret most in your life
- 1593
- 01:20:52,918 --> 01:20:55,995
- is not finishing school
- and now you're gonna do it again?
- 1594
- 01:20:56,026 --> 01:20:57,945
- You know what I regret?
- 1595
- 01:20:57,976 --> 01:21:00,968
- I regret that when you look back
- on your senior year of college,
- 1596
- 01:21:01,000 --> 01:21:04,879
- all you're gonna think about
- is your mom's crazy mid-life crisis.
- 1597
- 01:21:04,910 --> 01:21:05,994
- That's what I regret.
- 1598
- 01:21:06,025 --> 01:21:10,009
- The worst part is I don't think I was
- being a very good mom to you lately.
- 1599
- 01:21:10,040 --> 01:21:13,001
- And I'm so... I'm so sorry about that.
- 1600
- 01:21:13,032 --> 01:21:14,086
- No, it's OK.
- 1601
- 01:21:14,868 --> 01:21:16,088
- It's not OK, actually.
- 1602
- 01:21:16,870 --> 01:21:19,862
- Not one bit. Not with me,
- shouldn't be with you.
- 1603
- 01:21:20,019 --> 01:21:22,041
- And I'm... I'm gonna do better.
- 1604
- 01:21:22,073 --> 01:21:24,096
- - I love you, Mom.
- - I love you, too.
- 1605
- 01:21:25,024 --> 01:21:26,880
- You're so great.
- 1606
- 01:21:26,911 --> 01:21:28,903
- - What are we gonna do?
- - Well...
- 1607
- 01:21:29,048 --> 01:21:30,925
- You can start by drinking that.
- 1608
- 01:21:30,957 --> 01:21:34,065
- Let's go round up the girls and...
- tell them all about it.
- 1609
- 01:21:35,973 --> 01:21:38,100
- I don't get it.
- Why are you leaving school?
- 1610
- 01:21:38,882 --> 01:21:42,918
- Well, I'm in a bit of a tricky position,
- financially.
- 1611
- 01:21:42,949 --> 01:21:47,109
- So, for right now
- I can't cover my tuition and it's over.
- 1612
- 01:21:47,891 --> 01:21:48,986
- It's never over!
- 1613
- 01:21:49,017 --> 01:21:51,009
- Was it over when I fell into a coma?
- 1614
- 01:21:51,040 --> 01:21:53,011
- Well, for eight years, it was.
- 1615
- 01:21:53,042 --> 01:21:54,961
- That's an awesome point, Amanda.
- 1616
- 01:21:54,992 --> 01:21:56,963
- But now I'm back and I'm kicking ass.
- 1617
- 01:21:56,994 --> 01:21:58,099
- Just like Dee Rock here.
- 1618
- 01:21:58,131 --> 01:22:01,916
- She's gonna kick ass and graduate
- and get a job
- 1619
- 01:22:01,947 --> 01:22:03,991
- and become the next Indiana Jones.
- 1620
- 01:22:04,950 --> 01:22:06,119
- - Come here.
- - Please don't go.
- 1621
- 01:22:07,943 --> 01:22:10,133
- You guys, we can't let this happen
- to my mom a second time.
- 1622
- 01:22:10,914 --> 01:22:12,959
- She deserves to graduate.
- We gotta help her.
- 1623
- 01:22:12,990 --> 01:22:16,921
- OK, in order to finish,
- Dee Rock needs in the neighbourhood of...
- 1624
- 01:22:16,953 --> 01:22:18,141
- No, it's almost $12,000.
- 1625
- 01:22:18,923 --> 01:22:20,998
- - My God!
- - I don't have that kind of money.
- 1626
- 01:22:21,030 --> 01:22:25,002
- You know what? This isn't your problem
- to solve, ladies. You can let this go!
- 1627
- 01:22:25,034 --> 01:22:28,016
- - Can I say something?
- OTHERS: Yes, Debbie, just say it.
- 1628
- 01:22:28,047 --> 01:22:29,079
- Say it.
- 1629
- 01:22:29,110 --> 01:22:32,124
- OK, we throw a party to raise money
- to keep Glenn in school.
- 1630
- 01:22:32,155 --> 01:22:35,023
- Deb, we can't raise that much money
- from a party.
- 1631
- 01:22:35,054 --> 01:22:37,014
- We don't throw just any party.
- 1632
- 01:22:37,046 --> 01:22:40,038
- We throw the best party
- this school has ever seen.
- 1633
- 01:22:40,069 --> 01:22:42,166
- If we charge $40 a head...
- 1634
- 01:22:43,010 --> 01:22:45,044
- - 1,000 students...
- - OK.
- 1635
- 01:22:45,075 --> 01:22:49,152
- ..that is $4,000.
- 1636
- 01:22:50,018 --> 01:22:53,094
- - No, it's not.
- - No. That's $40,000.
- 1637
- 01:22:53,125 --> 01:22:55,044
- What? Done!
- 1638
- 01:22:55,075 --> 01:22:59,997
- A bunch of kids are not gonna pay $40
- to keep some divorcée in college.
- 1639
- 01:23:00,028 --> 01:23:01,196
- No, but they might pay 20.
- 1640
- 01:23:01,978 --> 01:23:03,177
- Which is $200,000.
- 1641
- 01:23:03,959 --> 01:23:06,034
- No, $20,000.
- 1642
- 01:23:06,065 --> 01:23:07,129
- - Helen, come on.
- - No, honey.
- 1643
- 01:23:07,160 --> 01:23:10,111
- But that's way more money than we need
- to keep Mom in school.
- 1644
- 01:23:10,142 --> 01:23:11,977
- What do you say, Mom?
- 1645
- 01:23:12,009 --> 01:23:13,155
- - Come on, Glenn.
- - Please.
- 1646
- 01:23:15,199 --> 01:23:18,056
- I say you ladies are pretty remarkable.
- 1647
- 01:23:18,088 --> 01:23:19,204
- I mean, to be this age
- 1648
- 01:23:19,985 --> 01:23:22,999
- and to have your whole world
- turned upside down
- 1649
- 01:23:23,031 --> 01:23:25,200
- and to come out with friends like you
- on the other side
- 1650
- 01:23:25,982 --> 01:23:28,130
- is quite a thing, really.
- 1651
- 01:23:28,161 --> 01:23:30,163
- And I'm proud to be your sister.
- 1652
- 01:23:30,194 --> 01:23:33,156
- And I'm so proud to be your mom
- and I'm proud of you.
- 1653
- 01:23:33,187 --> 01:23:35,116
- I'm proud of you.
- 1654
- 01:23:36,107 --> 01:23:40,204
- And I'm so worried about the math skills
- in this room.
- 1655
- 01:23:41,101 --> 01:23:42,206
- I don't mean to single you out
- 1656
- 01:23:42,238 --> 01:23:46,117
- but, Helen, I'm staring
- right down the barrel at you.
- 1657
- 01:23:47,211 --> 01:23:52,175
- And I'm starting to think that maybe
- this party plan just might work!
- 1658
- 01:23:53,092 --> 01:23:54,145
- Come on, Mom.
- 1659
- 01:23:54,178 --> 01:23:56,022
- No! I don't know!
- 1660
- 01:23:56,054 --> 01:23:57,212
- All right, I'm down to clown!
- 1661
- 01:24:00,163 --> 01:24:03,166
- This is going to be epic!
- 1662
- 01:24:08,181 --> 01:24:10,256
- OK. No one wants to show up first
- to a party.
- 1663
- 01:24:11,038 --> 01:24:13,207
- I'm sure lots of people are gonna come.
- 1664
- 01:24:13,238 --> 01:24:16,189
- Guess everyone's
- at the Christina Aguilera concert.
- 1665
- 01:24:16,220 --> 01:24:19,057
- - What? That's tonight?
- - Yeah.
- 1666
- 01:24:19,088 --> 01:24:21,069
- My God. We don't stand a chance.
- 1667
- 01:24:21,184 --> 01:24:23,092
- All right, ladies,
- 1668
- 01:24:23,123 --> 01:24:25,073
- we gotta do something drastic.
- 1669
- 01:24:25,250 --> 01:24:28,107
- Because this is not working.
- 1670
- 01:24:28,265 --> 01:24:31,205
- You know,
- I don't wanna be a negative Nelly
- 1671
- 01:24:31,236 --> 01:24:33,259
- but that is a tough pic, guys.
- 1672
- 01:24:33,291 --> 01:24:35,282
- You look happy and scared.
- 1673
- 01:24:36,064 --> 01:24:37,295
- I do, don't I?
- 1674
- 01:24:38,077 --> 01:24:39,192
- - All right.
- - I like it.
- 1675
- 01:24:39,224 --> 01:24:41,080
- Screw this. Give me your phone.
- 1676
- 01:24:41,111 --> 01:24:42,279
- Why? What do you want?
- 1677
- 01:24:43,061 --> 01:24:45,271
- I'm gonna tweet out a juicier carrot.
- 1678
- 01:24:49,077 --> 01:24:50,297
- - Maddie!
- - You're crazy.
- 1679
- 01:24:51,079 --> 01:24:52,226
- What is it? What did you do?
- 1680
- 01:24:52,257 --> 01:24:55,146
- I just tweeted
- to Helen's three million followers
- 1681
- 01:24:55,177 --> 01:24:59,087
- that Christina Aguilera is gonna come
- to the party after her concert tonight.
- 1682
- 01:24:59,119 --> 01:25:02,122
- My God! My God! My God!
- 1683
- 01:25:02,153 --> 01:25:03,311
- I love Christina Aguilera!
- 1684
- 01:25:04,092 --> 01:25:06,136
- She's the only person
- I ever had a poster of.
- 1685
- 01:25:06,272 --> 01:25:08,254
- She's not actually coming, Debbie.
- 1686
- 01:25:08,285 --> 01:25:10,162
- But nobody needs to know that.
- 1687
- 01:25:10,193 --> 01:25:12,247
- How do you have three million followers?
- 1688
- 01:25:13,186 --> 01:25:15,209
- Coma Girl. I'm a medical mystery.
- 1689
- 01:25:15,240 --> 01:25:18,243
- Now, Maddie, I don't know.
- There's a real...
- 1690
- 01:25:18,274 --> 01:25:21,256
- fibbing element to that
- that I don't like.
- 1691
- 01:25:23,310 --> 01:25:25,177
- Do you think it'll work?
- 1692
- 01:25:26,147 --> 01:25:27,231
- I believed it.
- 1693
- 01:25:33,341 --> 01:25:35,291
- I think it's definitely working.
- 1694
- 01:25:35,322 --> 01:25:37,199
- Hell yeah, it is.
- 1695
- 01:25:38,190 --> 01:25:40,161
- Hey, here you go. Have fun!
- 1696
- 01:25:40,192 --> 01:25:43,132
- Thanks for posting about Christina.
- I couldn't get tickets.
- 1697
- 01:25:43,164 --> 01:25:44,364
- - Coma Girl rules.
- - Thank you!
- 1698
- 01:25:45,145 --> 01:25:46,157
- All right.
- 1699
- 01:25:46,188 --> 01:25:48,326
- - Thank you.
- - It's amazing.
- 1700
- 01:25:48,357 --> 01:25:50,234
- I'm tired of doing this.
- 1701
- 01:25:50,265 --> 01:25:51,329
- No, Helen, we can't all...
- 1702
- 01:25:51,360 --> 01:25:53,237
- Hey! When's Christina getting here?
- 1703
- 01:25:53,268 --> 01:25:54,321
- - Guys...
- - Yeah.
- 1704
- 01:25:54,353 --> 01:25:57,283
- Christina's coming.
- She's the voice of our generation.
- 1705
- 01:25:57,314 --> 01:25:59,212
- - True.
- - We can wait for her.
- 1706
- 01:25:59,243 --> 01:26:00,348
- ♪ ..confession
- 1707
- 01:26:00,380 --> 01:26:03,153
- ♪ I'm gonna teach you boys a lesson
- 1708
- 01:26:03,362 --> 01:26:05,249
- - Cheers.
- - Cheers.
- 1709
- 01:26:08,148 --> 01:26:09,295
- - It's good!
- - It's not bad!
- 1710
- 01:26:09,326 --> 01:26:11,338
- - Yeah.
- - Yeah.
- 1711
- 01:26:11,370 --> 01:26:13,382
- Do you wanna meet in the garage
- in 20 minutes?
- 1712
- 01:26:14,164 --> 01:26:16,208
- - Yes, I do.
- - Yes, you would.
- 1713
- 01:26:16,324 --> 01:26:18,210
- No, no, no!
- 1714
- 01:26:19,169 --> 01:26:20,380
- God, make better choices.
- 1715
- 01:26:21,161 --> 01:26:23,299
- Um...hey, come on back.
- 1716
- 01:26:23,331 --> 01:26:25,364
- That popped right out of my mouth
- 1717
- 01:26:25,395 --> 01:26:28,409
- when actually I meant to say
- we're not gonna do that.
- 1718
- 01:26:29,264 --> 01:26:31,339
- The... That's... You don't like the wine?
- 1719
- 01:26:33,184 --> 01:26:35,416
- No, the wine is great and...
- 1720
- 01:26:36,385 --> 01:26:38,252
- and you're great and...
- 1721
- 01:26:39,201 --> 01:26:42,225
- I just think
- when you meet the right person,
- 1722
- 01:26:42,256 --> 01:26:43,371
- which is not me,
- 1723
- 01:26:44,258 --> 01:26:46,427
- she's gonna be really, really lucky
- 1724
- 01:26:47,209 --> 01:26:50,201
- but I think that we're...
- 1725
- 01:26:50,233 --> 01:26:53,225
- Yeah, we should
- just really be good friends.
- 1726
- 01:26:53,256 --> 01:26:55,332
- I don't think I can get on board
- with this, Dee.
- 1727
- 01:26:55,364 --> 01:26:57,428
- Well, I think it's for the best.
- 1728
- 01:26:58,346 --> 01:26:59,399
- - OK.
- - OK?
- 1729
- 01:26:59,430 --> 01:27:01,359
- Yeah, if you say so.
- 1730
- 01:27:01,390 --> 01:27:03,434
- Hey, Mom, look who's here!
- 1731
- 01:27:04,216 --> 01:27:06,343
- - Hi!
- - Hi, what are you doing here?
- 1732
- 01:27:06,375 --> 01:27:09,388
- Well, I started following Coma Girl
- on Twitter
- 1733
- 01:27:09,419 --> 01:27:11,338
- and I came to see...
- 1734
- 01:27:12,287 --> 01:27:13,434
- Xtina!
- 1735
- 01:27:14,216 --> 01:27:15,363
- Yeah!
- 1736
- 01:27:15,394 --> 01:27:18,376
- Hi, Jack. I'm Christine.
- 1737
- 01:27:18,407 --> 01:27:20,264
- We met at the restaurant.
- 1738
- 01:27:20,295 --> 01:27:24,226
- - Yeah, hi. I remember you...both.
- - My man.
- 1739
- 01:27:25,447 --> 01:27:27,470
- God, I just... I wanna
- go back to college so bad.
- 1740
- 01:27:28,251 --> 01:27:29,419
- Just go back to Frank.
- Go back to Frank.
- 1741
- 01:27:29,451 --> 01:27:32,277
- Hey, hey! We're here.
- 1742
- 01:27:32,464 --> 01:27:35,353
- My God! What are they doing here?
- 1743
- 01:27:35,384 --> 01:27:37,355
- I don't wanna be at a party
- with my mom and dad.
- 1744
- 01:27:37,386 --> 01:27:39,429
- Yeah, that must be so weird for you, Mom.
- 1745
- 01:27:40,389 --> 01:27:43,350
- - Mom.
- - Sweetheart!
- 1746
- 01:27:43,381 --> 01:27:45,342
- Hi. Hey, Dad.
- 1747
- 01:27:45,373 --> 01:27:47,302
- We heard you were having a party.
- 1748
- 01:27:47,333 --> 01:27:48,470
- So I made a taco salad.
- 1749
- 01:27:49,252 --> 01:27:51,410
- Yeah, I told her
- a bunch of kids don't want a taco salad.
- 1750
- 01:27:51,441 --> 01:27:54,455
- - I would love to have some taco salad.
- - Please, yeah! I love taco salad.
- 1751
- 01:27:54,486 --> 01:27:57,302
- - See, I told you!
- - OK. All right.
- 1752
- 01:27:57,333 --> 01:27:58,344
- Your parents?
- 1753
- 01:27:58,376 --> 01:28:01,358
- Yeah. This is my mom and dad,
- Mike and Sandy.
- 1754
- 01:28:01,389 --> 01:28:02,453
- - Yeah.
- - Hello.
- 1755
- 01:28:03,402 --> 01:28:05,310
- Wow! OK. Um...
- 1756
- 01:28:05,341 --> 01:28:08,324
- Wow! A lovely, lovely couple.
- 1757
- 01:28:08,355 --> 01:28:10,357
- It's... It's such a pleasure to meet you.
- 1758
- 01:28:10,389 --> 01:28:14,351
- You've raised...wow!
- What an incredible woman!
- 1759
- 01:28:14,445 --> 01:28:16,322
- Sorry, I'm Jack Strong.
- 1760
- 01:28:16,353 --> 01:28:19,366
- We've been seeing each other
- for a little bit now.
- 1761
- 01:28:19,398 --> 01:28:22,390
- Well, I guess we're kind of on a break.
- Pretty recent.
- 1762
- 01:28:22,421 --> 01:28:24,475
- But I want you both to know
- 1763
- 01:28:24,507 --> 01:28:28,521
- that I'm gonna take the best care
- of your daughter that I can.
- 1764
- 01:28:29,303 --> 01:28:31,420
- - She means the world to me.
- - OK.
- 1765
- 01:28:31,451 --> 01:28:34,392
- I... I gotta... I have a gun, son.
- 1766
- 01:28:34,423 --> 01:28:35,486
- No.
- 1767
- 01:28:35,518 --> 01:28:37,332
- We're just gonna walk off.
- 1768
- 01:28:37,363 --> 01:28:39,334
- - Are you kidding me?
- - All right. No.
- 1769
- 01:28:39,365 --> 01:28:42,349
- Taco salad train. Choo-choo!
- 1770
- 01:28:46,384 --> 01:28:48,448
- Hey, where's Christina Aguilera?
- 1771
- 01:28:48,480 --> 01:28:50,419
- This is false advertising!
- 1772
- 01:28:50,450 --> 01:28:52,327
- Guys, she's coming, OK?
- 1773
- 01:28:52,359 --> 01:28:53,464
- She's gonna be here soon.
- 1774
- 01:28:53,495 --> 01:28:56,529
- Hey...I saw your tweet.
- 1775
- 01:28:56,561 --> 01:28:58,490
- Where's Xtina?
- 1776
- 01:28:58,521 --> 01:29:00,450
- She's not gonna show up, is she?
- 1777
- 01:29:00,481 --> 01:29:02,379
- You guys suck!
- 1778
- 01:29:02,410 --> 01:29:04,412
- If Christina doesn't show soon...
- 1779
- 01:29:06,373 --> 01:29:08,468
- ..I'm gonna put your ass in another coma.
- 1780
- 01:29:08,500 --> 01:29:10,418
- Count of three, bitch.
- 1781
- 01:29:10,450 --> 01:29:12,379
- One, two...
- 1782
- 01:29:20,544 --> 01:29:23,370
- Look, honey, we love you.
- 1783
- 01:29:23,401 --> 01:29:25,393
- We want you to graduate.
- 1784
- 01:29:25,424 --> 01:29:27,374
- This is for you.
- 1785
- 01:29:28,385 --> 01:29:29,563
- What is...
- 1786
- 01:29:30,460 --> 01:29:32,441
- - No.
- - Yep.
- 1787
- 01:29:32,473 --> 01:29:34,433
- I love you so much,
- but I'm not gonna let you
- 1788
- 01:29:34,464 --> 01:29:36,404
- take apart your 401 for this.
- 1789
- 01:29:36,435 --> 01:29:37,478
- I got this.
- 1790
- 01:29:37,509 --> 01:29:39,407
- Honey, come on...
- 1791
- 01:29:41,440 --> 01:29:43,463
- Hey! Hey!
- 1792
- 01:29:44,547 --> 01:29:46,559
- - Eat gluten!
- - I ain't allowed to have gluten!
- 1793
- 01:29:46,591 --> 01:29:48,384
- My God!
- 1794
- 01:29:48,416 --> 01:29:49,510
- Frank, do something!
- 1795
- 01:29:49,543 --> 01:29:52,378
- - What am I gonna do?
- - I don't know! Do something.
- 1796
- 01:29:52,409 --> 01:29:53,432
- Come on, girls!
- 1797
- 01:29:53,463 --> 01:29:55,403
- Ladies! Hey! Let's break it up!
- 1798
- 01:29:58,395 --> 01:29:59,480
- You!
- 1799
- 01:30:02,629 --> 01:30:06,403
- Her skull is so strong.
- 1800
- 01:30:06,435 --> 01:30:08,478
- Sweetheart, you were so brave.
- 1801
- 01:30:08,510 --> 01:30:11,533
- That's my brave man. Come on,
- let's go make love in the bathroom.
- 1802
- 01:30:11,565 --> 01:30:15,402
- OK. I can't see, so...just lead me.
- 1803
- 01:30:15,433 --> 01:30:16,497
- There we go.
- 1804
- 01:30:17,414 --> 01:30:19,521
- No! Stop fighting, girls!
- 1805
- 01:30:19,552 --> 01:30:21,543
- - Say night-night.
- - No! No!
- 1806
- 01:30:21,575 --> 01:30:23,597
- No!
- 1807
- 01:30:27,424 --> 01:30:28,551
- Boy!
- 1808
- 01:30:28,583 --> 01:30:30,605
- - My God, Mom!
- - Dee Dee!
- 1809
- 01:30:30,637 --> 01:30:33,421
- - She got me in the biscuits!
- - My God!
- 1810
- 01:30:33,452 --> 01:30:34,609
- I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry!
- 1811
- 01:30:34,641 --> 01:30:37,498
- You punched Dee Rock?
- I'm gonna squish you like a grape!
- 1812
- 01:30:37,529 --> 01:30:41,439
- Guys, stop it! Stop it! Stop it! God!
- 1813
- 01:30:41,471 --> 01:30:44,442
- Ladies, we have enough stuff
- to worry about as women.
- 1814
- 01:30:44,474 --> 01:30:47,477
- - You shouldn't be fighting each other.
- - I'm sorry, Dee Rock.
- 1815
- 01:30:47,508 --> 01:30:49,552
- I'm sorry I punched you
- in the mom boob.
- 1816
- 01:30:49,583 --> 01:30:51,574
- - Tell each other sorry.
- - I'm sorry, Dee Rock.
- 1817
- 01:30:51,606 --> 01:30:52,680
- Thank you.
- 1818
- 01:30:53,587 --> 01:30:55,578
- Would you care for a Kahlúa and cranberry?
- 1819
- 01:30:56,465 --> 01:30:57,549
- Ew. That...
- 1820
- 01:30:57,580 --> 01:30:59,667
- I would do it. I would do it. Yeah.
- 1821
- 01:31:00,542 --> 01:31:01,564
- - OK.
- - OK.
- 1822
- 01:31:01,596 --> 01:31:02,691
- I want one.
- 1823
- 01:31:03,567 --> 01:31:05,453
- Mom, are you OK?
- 1824
- 01:31:05,485 --> 01:31:06,674
- She popped me right in the bosom.
- 1825
- 01:31:07,456 --> 01:31:09,458
- I really got T-boned.
- 1826
- 01:31:09,489 --> 01:31:10,678
- - Mom.
- - You know, what...
- 1827
- 01:31:11,460 --> 01:31:12,638
- What am I doing here?
- 1828
- 01:31:13,556 --> 01:31:16,548
- I'm lying to these kids.
- I'm taking their money. I...
- 1829
- 01:31:17,508 --> 01:31:18,602
- I got this.
- 1830
- 01:31:18,634 --> 01:31:20,636
- Hey, everybody, you know what?
- 1831
- 01:31:20,667 --> 01:31:21,699
- Party's over.
- 1832
- 01:31:22,481 --> 01:31:24,598
- Head on back to the door.
- We're gonna give you a refund.
- 1833
- 01:31:24,629 --> 01:31:26,610
- Christina Aguilera is in no way...
- 1834
- 01:31:26,642 --> 01:31:28,654
- Can I see you for a second?
- 1835
- 01:31:28,685 --> 01:31:30,594
- God bless!
- 1836
- 01:31:31,667 --> 01:31:33,723
- Leonor or Lenore...
- 1837
- 01:31:34,504 --> 01:31:35,662
- you gotta stop doing that.
- 1838
- 01:31:35,693 --> 01:31:37,695
- Can I see you for a second?
- 1839
- 01:31:37,727 --> 01:31:39,635
- Now is not really a good time.
- 1840
- 01:31:39,666 --> 01:31:40,730
- Outside! Now!
- 1841
- 01:31:41,512 --> 01:31:43,587
- Don't make eye contact.
- 1842
- 01:31:43,701 --> 01:31:46,715
- Look at me. Look me in my eyes.
- 1843
- 01:31:47,497 --> 01:31:48,685
- - Look me in my eyes now.
- - Debbie.
- 1844
- 01:31:48,717 --> 01:31:50,510
- I'm scared.
- 1845
- 01:31:50,542 --> 01:31:52,575
- Look. Look, look.
- 1846
- 01:31:52,606 --> 01:31:53,670
- Come outside.
- 1847
- 01:31:53,701 --> 01:31:55,703
- - Let's go!
- - If I'm going, you're going.
- 1848
- 01:31:56,506 --> 01:31:57,747
- - I don't wanna go.
- - We're stronger as a group.
- 1849
- 01:31:59,062 --> 01:32:00,970
- Leonor.
- 1850
- 01:32:03,045 --> 01:32:05,923
- Leonor, what is going on?
- 1851
- 01:32:08,999 --> 01:32:10,928
- Hey, guys. I'm Christina.
- 1852
- 01:32:12,992 --> 01:32:14,035
- - My God!
- - My God!
- 1853
- 01:32:14,066 --> 01:32:16,944
- - I love you. I love you so much!
- - I love you, too.
- 1854
- 01:32:16,976 --> 01:32:18,091
- How is this happening?
- 1855
- 01:32:18,873 --> 01:32:22,064
- I knew she wasn't playing at your party
- cos Christina's my cousin.
- 1856
- 01:32:23,034 --> 01:32:24,952
- We're more like sisters.
- 1857
- 01:32:24,984 --> 01:32:27,038
- She always says that,
- but we're just cousins.
- 1858
- 01:32:27,069 --> 01:32:28,112
- Isn't she so funny?
- 1859
- 01:32:29,040 --> 01:32:33,075
- That's what I'm always saying to you.
- I'm always saying you're so funny.
- 1860
- 01:32:33,107 --> 01:32:36,100
- I just can't kind of figure out
- why you're doing this.
- 1861
- 01:32:36,881 --> 01:32:38,978
- Because you're a good lady.
- 1862
- 01:32:39,009 --> 01:32:41,897
- I mean, you're a sad, older lady
- 1863
- 01:32:41,929 --> 01:32:44,973
- but you're still a good lady
- that needs help.
- 1864
- 01:32:45,005 --> 01:32:46,120
- Us ladies gotta stick together.
- 1865
- 01:32:46,902 --> 01:32:49,061
- She filled me in about,
- you know, you being here.
- 1866
- 01:32:49,092 --> 01:32:52,950
- - I support your cause. I wanna do this.
- - Thank you. God, you're cool!
- 1867
- 01:32:52,981 --> 01:32:54,086
- Where are we doing this thing?
- 1868
- 01:32:54,118 --> 01:32:56,130
- Backyard.
- We just put up some twinkle lights.
- 1869
- 01:32:56,912 --> 01:32:58,090
- Love twinkle lights
- but I've got my own lights.
- 1870
- 01:32:58,122 --> 01:33:00,072
- Boys, bring 'em out. Let's go!
- 1871
- 01:33:00,103 --> 01:33:03,971
- Donald, Craig, Jerry, let's go.
- 1872
- 01:33:06,098 --> 01:33:11,041
- Ladies and gentlemen,
- my cousin, Christina Aguilera.
- 1873
- 01:33:11,073 --> 01:33:12,939
- Get it, girl!
- 1874
- 01:33:18,164 --> 01:33:20,051
- ♪ After all you put me through
- 1875
- 01:33:20,958 --> 01:33:22,981
- ♪ You'd think I'd despise you
- 1876
- 01:33:23,012 --> 01:33:25,098
- ♪ But in the end, I wanna thank you
- 1877
- 01:33:25,129 --> 01:33:27,079
- ♪ Because you've made me
- that much stronger
- 1878
- 01:33:27,110 --> 01:33:29,175
- ♪ Well, I thought I knew you
- 1879
- 01:33:29,957 --> 01:33:32,053
- ♪ Thinkin' that you were true
- 1880
- 01:33:32,084 --> 01:33:34,127
- ♪ Guess I, I couldn't trust
- 1881
- 01:33:34,159 --> 01:33:36,036
- ♪ I called your bluff
- - My God!
- 1882
- 01:33:36,067 --> 01:33:37,151
- ♪ Because I've had enough
- 1883
- 01:33:37,183 --> 01:33:40,019
- ♪ You were there by my side
- 1884
- 01:33:40,050 --> 01:33:42,146
- ♪ Always down for the ride
- 1885
- 01:33:42,177 --> 01:33:45,150
- ♪ But your joyride
- just came down in flames
- 1886
- 01:33:45,181 --> 01:33:47,131
- ♪ Because your greed sold me out in shame
- 1887
- 01:33:47,162 --> 01:33:51,010
- ♪ after all of
- the stealing and cheating
- 1888
- 01:33:51,041 --> 01:33:54,117
- ♪ You probably think that
- I hold resentment for you
- 1889
- 01:33:54,148 --> 01:33:58,173
- ♪ But no, you're wrong
- 1890
- 01:33:58,205 --> 01:34:01,020
- ♪ Because if it wasn't
- for all that you tried to do
- 1891
- 01:34:01,051 --> 01:34:02,104
- ♪ I wouldn't know
- 1892
- 01:34:02,136 --> 01:34:05,066
- ♪ Just how capable I am to pull through
- 1893
- 01:34:05,983 --> 01:34:08,069
- Yeah! We got it! You got the money!
- 1894
- 01:34:08,100 --> 01:34:11,040
- ♪ Because it makes me that much stronger
- 1895
- 01:34:11,072 --> 01:34:13,178
- ♪ Makes me work a little bit harder
- 1896
- 01:34:13,209 --> 01:34:16,066
- ♪ It makes me that much wiser
- 1897
- 01:34:16,098 --> 01:34:18,986
- ♪ So thanks for making me a fighter
- 1898
- 01:34:19,017 --> 01:34:21,019
- This is the best night of my life!
- 1899
- 01:34:21,166 --> 01:34:23,168
- ♪ Made my skin a little bit thicker
- 1900
- 01:34:23,199 --> 01:34:26,088
- ♪ Makes me that
- ♪ Much smarter
- 1901
- 01:34:26,119 --> 01:34:29,122
- ♪ So thanks for making me a fighter
- 1902
- 01:34:43,188 --> 01:34:44,210
- Just a minute.
- 1903
- 01:34:44,241 --> 01:34:46,222
- It seems... I got it now.
- 1904
- 01:34:46,254 --> 01:34:48,047
- - Got it?
- - Yeah.
- 1905
- 01:34:49,069 --> 01:34:51,113
- May I just have a minute?
- 1906
- 01:34:51,144 --> 01:34:55,169
- I just... I wanted to thank you
- for giving me a second chance.
- 1907
- 01:34:55,200 --> 01:34:56,265
- It means a lot to me.
- 1908
- 01:34:57,046 --> 01:35:00,101
- Of course. It's only because
- it's a requirement to pass the course.
- 1909
- 01:35:00,133 --> 01:35:02,083
- That and the fact
- you're my favourite student.
- 1910
- 01:35:02,114 --> 01:35:04,241
- - Well...
- - Break a leg.
- 1911
- 01:35:04,273 --> 01:35:06,160
- - Well...
- - Let's hope not.
- 1912
- 01:35:06,191 --> 01:35:07,234
- Yeah, sorry.
- 1913
- 01:35:07,265 --> 01:35:10,154
- Um...Deanna Miles, everybody.
- 1914
- 01:35:11,040 --> 01:35:12,083
- Thank you.
- 1915
- 01:35:14,189 --> 01:35:17,129
- Also, this is here if you need it.
- 1916
- 01:35:17,161 --> 01:35:18,245
- Thank you.
- 1917
- 01:35:23,073 --> 01:35:24,178
- Hello.
- 1918
- 01:35:30,121 --> 01:35:35,074
- March 25th, 2014, historian Albert...
- 1919
- 01:35:35,252 --> 01:35:42,072
- Albrecht Rümschtein announced
- that the burial tomb of Attila the Hun
- 1920
- 01:35:42,103 --> 01:35:44,282
- had been discovered in Budapest, Hungary.
- 1921
- 01:35:45,137 --> 01:35:46,295
- Now, the...
- 1922
- 01:35:49,131 --> 01:35:51,310
- - Sorry about your eye.
- - Yeah, it's fine.
- 1923
- 01:35:52,092 --> 01:35:53,104
- Hi!
- 1924
- 01:35:53,135 --> 01:35:55,106
- - It's for her.
- - That's my mom.
- 1925
- 01:35:55,262 --> 01:35:58,150
- It's important for her.
- It's emotional support.
- 1926
- 01:35:58,182 --> 01:35:59,256
- I'll give you five bucks.
- 1927
- 01:35:59,287 --> 01:36:01,247
- OK, thanks. OK.
- 1928
- 01:36:02,238 --> 01:36:04,177
- I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
- 1929
- 01:36:06,231 --> 01:36:08,192
- I'm so sorry for the interruption.
- 1930
- 01:36:08,223 --> 01:36:10,341
- These are my sorority sisters.
- 1931
- 01:36:11,122 --> 01:36:12,343
- Hey. It's me, Helen.
- 1932
- 01:36:13,125 --> 01:36:14,157
- I know.
- 1933
- 01:36:14,188 --> 01:36:15,335
- He knows that.
- 1934
- 01:36:17,191 --> 01:36:19,110
- You got this, Mom.
- 1935
- 01:36:24,292 --> 01:36:28,296
- A group of archaeologists
- using carbon dating
- 1936
- 01:36:28,327 --> 01:36:32,175
- proved that the grave was in fact a hoax.
- 1937
- 01:36:32,206 --> 01:36:35,334
- There were so many scientists involved
- that it was...
- 1938
- 01:36:38,212 --> 01:36:40,350
- ..it was standing tomb only.
- 1939
- 01:36:41,132 --> 01:36:43,259
- Whoo!
- 1940
- 01:36:45,157 --> 01:36:48,149
- Thank you. I wasn't sure about that one.
- 1941
- 01:36:48,369 --> 01:36:51,383
- Now I hope that you're all Hungary...
- 1942
- 01:36:52,165 --> 01:36:53,301
- ..for some facts
- 1943
- 01:36:53,332 --> 01:36:58,150
- because I'm about to give you
- the thrilla about Attila.
- 1944
- 01:36:58,181 --> 01:37:00,267
- Guys, that's my mom. She's killing it!
- 1945
- 01:37:00,298 --> 01:37:02,248
- Go, Dee!
- 1946
- 01:37:10,349 --> 01:37:12,372
- OK, guys, thanks.
- 1947
- 01:37:13,332 --> 01:37:16,241
- Number one, there was
- no Professor Rümschtein.
- 1948
- 01:37:16,272 --> 01:37:17,410
- Complete, complete hoax.
- 1949
- 01:37:18,191 --> 01:37:20,172
- This person didn't exist, PR fact.
- 1950
- 01:37:20,203 --> 01:37:22,269
- I know. I was shocked
- when I found out, too.
- 1951
- 01:37:23,311 --> 01:37:25,418
- These young men and women
- comport themselves
- 1952
- 01:37:26,200 --> 01:37:28,233
- with astounding grace and wisdom.
- 1953
- 01:37:28,264 --> 01:37:30,391
- Every one of them
- brings tremendous pride
- 1954
- 01:37:30,423 --> 01:37:33,186
- to this hallowed institution.
- 1955
- 01:37:33,217 --> 01:37:34,343
- And on a personal note,
- 1956
- 01:37:34,374 --> 01:37:38,316
- I will say that the future of this world
- is in pretty good hands.
- 1957
- 01:37:38,347 --> 01:37:42,216
- You may now move your tassels to the left.
- 1958
- 01:37:42,247 --> 01:37:48,263
- Congratulations to Decatur University's
- graduating class of 2018.
- 1959
- 01:37:50,297 --> 01:37:51,412
- Whoo!
- 1960
- 01:37:53,447 --> 01:37:55,449
- - Hey, Christine!
- - Hey!
- 1961
- 01:37:56,230 --> 01:37:58,273
- - Congratulations!
- - Proud of you!
- 1962
- 01:37:58,306 --> 01:37:59,338
- - Thank you.
- - I love you.
- 1963
- 01:37:59,369 --> 01:38:00,412
- I love you, too.
- 1964
- 01:38:00,443 --> 01:38:02,435
- Come on.
- Let's go make love in the science lab.
- 1965
- 01:38:03,217 --> 01:38:04,405
- OK. Be right back.
- 1966
- 01:38:04,437 --> 01:38:05,448
- OK.
- 1967
- 01:38:06,230 --> 01:38:07,461
- Hey, Mom! Hi.
- 1968
- 01:38:08,243 --> 01:38:10,380
- - I'm so proud!
- - Congrats, baby.
- 1969
- 01:38:10,411 --> 01:38:12,413
- - Thank you for coming.
- - Look at our girl.
- 1970
- 01:38:12,445 --> 01:38:14,384
- Sweetheart!
- 1971
- 01:38:14,415 --> 01:38:16,345
- - Congrats.
- - Thank you, honey.
- 1972
- 01:38:16,376 --> 01:38:17,439
- - I'm ready.
- - You look great!
- 1973
- 01:38:17,471 --> 01:38:19,306
- I'm so proud of you guys.
- 1974
- 01:38:19,337 --> 01:38:22,455
- You two have made an old man very happy.
- 1975
- 01:38:23,237 --> 01:38:26,365
- My daughter, my granddaughter,
- both got a degree today.
- 1976
- 01:38:26,396 --> 01:38:28,294
- Screw you, Dan!
- 1977
- 01:38:28,325 --> 01:38:29,368
- - Dad!
- - Grandpa!
- 1978
- 01:38:29,399 --> 01:38:31,266
- - What?
- - Hey.
- 1979
- 01:38:31,297 --> 01:38:33,435
- I'm starving. Can we please
- go to Mike and Sandy's house?
- 1980
- 01:38:33,467 --> 01:38:36,428
- You know what?
- We'll catch up with you in a minute.
- 1981
- 01:38:36,459 --> 01:38:39,452
- But I just want...
- just a moment here with my girl.
- 1982
- 01:38:39,483 --> 01:38:41,423
- - OK, babe.
- - Sure, honey.
- 1983
- 01:38:42,497 --> 01:38:44,467
- - Bye.
- - You get out.
- 1984
- 01:38:50,380 --> 01:38:53,351
- Look at us! Couple of college grads!
- 1985
- 01:38:53,383 --> 01:38:55,468
- Mom, you did it. You got your degree.
- 1986
- 01:38:55,499 --> 01:38:57,459
- I'm so proud of you.
- 1987
- 01:38:58,440 --> 01:39:00,275
- I'm proud of me, too.
- 1988
- 01:39:00,306 --> 01:39:02,277
- But I'm really proud of you.
- 1989
- 01:39:02,308 --> 01:39:04,383
- I hope you soak it all in.
- This is your big day.
- 1990
- 01:39:04,414 --> 01:39:07,313
- I will. Wait, you didn't throw your hat!
- 1991
- 01:39:07,344 --> 01:39:09,483
- I think there were so many people
- 1992
- 01:39:09,514 --> 01:39:12,496
- and I just want to keep it
- as a memento for my alma mater.
- 1993
- 01:39:12,528 --> 01:39:14,446
- You can keep it, but you gotta throw it.
- 1994
- 01:39:14,477 --> 01:39:18,325
- - You don't wanna jinx it.
- - OK. I don't wanna jinx myself.
- 1995
- 01:39:18,356 --> 01:39:19,524
- - Yeah, already.
- - All right, here goes!
- 1996
- 01:39:20,306 --> 01:39:21,349
- Whoo!
- 1997
- 01:39:24,467 --> 01:39:26,354
- - My God.
- - Who did that?
- 1998
- 01:39:26,385 --> 01:39:28,491
- Marcie, the earring. It's gone.
- 1999
- 01:39:28,523 --> 01:39:30,368
- That's a half-carat.
- 2000
- 01:39:30,400 --> 01:39:32,412
- - Don't move.
- - You're such a fool.
- 2001
- 01:39:32,443 --> 01:39:33,507
- - We should go.
- - OK.
- 2002
- 01:39:33,538 --> 01:39:35,457
- Excuse me!
- 2003
- 01:39:38,408 --> 01:39:40,431
- ♪ Woman Up
- 2004
- 01:39:41,411 --> 01:39:43,350
- ♪ Put your favourite heels on
- 2005
- 01:39:43,487 --> 01:39:45,426
- ♪ Cos they make you feel strong
- 2006
- 01:39:45,509 --> 01:39:47,407
- ♪ When you're lookin' good
- 2007
- 01:39:47,439 --> 01:39:49,482
- ♪ You know you're gonna have a good time
- 2008
- 01:39:50,410 --> 01:39:52,339
- ♪ Don't forget mascara
- 2009
- 01:39:52,464 --> 01:39:54,477
- ♪ And to keep your head up
- 2010
- 01:39:55,332 --> 01:39:56,375
- ♪ Like Madonna would
- 2011
- 01:39:56,406 --> 01:39:58,418
- ♪ Rub her lipstick redder than wine
- 2012
- 01:39:58,450 --> 01:39:59,576
- ♪ So let's go
- 2013
- 01:40:00,358 --> 01:40:02,370
- ♪ Roll your bumper and whine slow
- 2014
- 01:40:02,401 --> 01:40:04,383
- ♪ Show the world you can shine, glow
- 2015
- 01:40:04,414 --> 01:40:05,457
- ♪ Cos you got the light now
- 2016
- 01:40:05,488 --> 01:40:06,530
- ♪ You got the light now
- 2017
- 01:40:08,366 --> 01:40:09,565
- ♪ All my girls raise your hand
- 2018
- 01:40:10,347 --> 01:40:12,422
- ♪ If you don't need a man
- 2019
- 01:40:12,453 --> 01:40:14,476
- ♪ Cos you're more than good enough
- 2020
- 01:40:15,362 --> 01:40:16,583
- ♪ You gotta woman up, woman up
- 2021
- 01:40:17,364 --> 01:40:19,398
- ♪ Don't matter what you've been through
- 2022
- 01:40:19,429 --> 01:40:21,567
- ♪ Just make them remember you
- 2023
- 01:40:21,599 --> 01:40:24,393
- ♪ This one for all my girls
- 2024
- 01:40:24,424 --> 01:40:26,447
- ♪ My girls who woman up, woman up
- 2025
- 01:40:27,500 --> 01:40:28,585
- ♪ Woman up, woman up
- 2026
- 01:40:29,492 --> 01:40:31,504
- ♪ Woman up, woman up
- 2027
- 01:40:31,609 --> 01:40:34,382
- ♪ Woman up, woman up
- 2028
- 01:40:35,435 --> 01:40:37,479
- ♪ Don't matter what you've been through
- 2029
- 01:40:37,510 --> 01:40:40,388
- ♪ Just make them remember you
- 2030
- 01:40:40,420 --> 01:40:42,453
- ♪ This one for all my girls
- 2031
- 01:40:42,484 --> 01:40:44,465
- ♪ My girls who woman up, woman up
- 2032
- 01:40:44,497 --> 01:40:46,519
- ♪ All my girls, raise your hand
- 2033
- 01:40:46,551 --> 01:40:49,408
- ♪ If you don't need a man
- 2034
- 01:40:49,439 --> 01:40:51,524
- ♪ Cos you're more than good enough
- 2035
- 01:40:51,556 --> 01:40:53,569
- ♪ You gotta woman up, woman up
- 2036
- 01:40:53,600 --> 01:40:55,550
- ♪ Don't matter what you've been through
- 2037
- 01:40:55,581 --> 01:40:58,480
- ♪ Just make them remember you
- 2038
- 01:40:58,512 --> 01:41:00,555
- ♪ This one for all my girls
- 2039
- 01:41:00,586 --> 01:41:02,609
- ♪ For girls who woman up, woman up
- 2040
- 01:44:24,828 --> 01:44:26,830
- subtitles by Deluxe
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