owlman

Tough | Text

Apr 13th, 2016
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  1. I'm so tough I eat fucking bulldogs for breakfast, I'm so tough that I sleep on a bed
  2. made out of LEGO, I'm so tough I shave with a blowtorch, I'm so tough I shower in
  3. pigs blood, I'm so tough the Prime Minister of the UK asked me to be his bodyguard,
  4. but I said no because I want to spend more time with my family.
  5. I'm so tough that I went back in time and cut off one of Hitler's balls, that's right IT
  6. WAS ME YOU UGLY MOTHER FUCKER!
  7.  
  8. I'm so tough that I put toothpaste on my balls for fun. I eat vinyl records for lunch. I
  9. use lemons as glasses. I use sandpaper as toilet paper. For dinner I eat computer
  10. parts. I shit out gold bricks.
  11.  
  12. If you mess with me, I probably won't do anything, as I'm a nice guy.
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