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Total Drama Chapter 3

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May 23rd, 2018
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  1. Lindsay: Is there an alligator?
  2. Heather: No, there's a plane carrying Alejandro, a contra, and LeShawna.
  3. Lindsay: Can you give me a tip on getting revenge on cereal?
  4. Heather: Um, no. Jetix thinks it's too complicated for you.
  5. Lindsay: So now I'm trapped?
  6. Heather: Oh Lindsay, could you stop being so stupid?
  7. Lindsay: This is making me dizzy.
  8. Heather: Fine, we'll form an alliance.
  9. Lindsay: Perfect! (Achoo!)
  10. Heather: (I ate my parents and Lindsay's parents!)
  11. ________________________
  12.  
  13. LeShawna: I'm in the mood for pinto beans.
  14. Izzy: Oh, this reminds me of this one time I called my bus driver a hoe, and then I told her I always wanted to visit Prague!
  15. LeShawna: Prague?
  16. Izzy: It's perfect for suicide!
  17. LeShawna: (Izzy is as crazy as a cat.)
  18.  
  19. __________________________
  20.  
  21. Zoey: Oh, these flowers are so gentle.
  22. Ezekiel: Of course, girls would say that. Guys are superior.
  23. Zoey: (Oh Ezekiel, I'm in love with your tiny little brain.)
  24. Jô: Go to Boca Raton! [Damn, Ezekiel!]
  25. Zoey: (Normally I sing Feliz Navidad on Christmas!)
  26.  
  27. __________________________
  28.  
  29. Trent: The United States' music is my favorite.
  30. Gwen: Our own country's is. (Oye! Trent is a dildo.)
  31. Cody: As you can clearly see... [Gets tired of holding a camera] ...I'm not muscular.
  32. Gwen: (To compensate for Cody's irritation) Here's a photo of Ember McLain you can jack off to.
  33. Trent: Farewell, and good luck, Cody!
  34. Cody: Bye, Trent!
  35.  
  36. _________________________
  37.  
  38. Gwen: I'm catching cancer.
  39. LeShawna: Check to see if you've been eating fruit.
  40. Gwen: What does fruit have to do with anything?
  41. LeShawna: Izzy told me so.
  42. Gwen: LeShawna, why would you listen to her?
  43. LeShawna: Why not?
  44. Gwen: She makes people suffer from hallucinations.
  45. LeShawna: Yeah, I'm more bogged down than my weight right now.
  46. [Gwen appoints Izzy head chef of the new Hell's Kitchen restaurant in Las Vegas! Forget Hell's Kitchen All-Stars!]
  47. Izzy: Hahahaha this is GREAT! (Gwen ate fruit, and now I don't have to deal with a white, skinny, British version of Chef!)
  48.  
  49. _______________________________
  50.  
  51. Heather: (I saw that exchange between LeShawna and Gwen. I'm not fazed by it. I have a magical alliance, and Cody's gross and cancerous behavior is perfect for making him a Transformer!) Hey Cody!
  52. Cody: Ugh, what now?
  53. Heather: I saw you talk to Gwen and Trent!
  54. Cody: I'm busy masturbating to Ember Mclain!
  55. Heather: You have a sad taste in females.
  56. Cody: Heather, this is an obligation for me.
  57. Heather: (Hahaha, what a fucking dumbass.)
  58.  
  59. Chris: Espeda un muto!
  60.  
  61. Courtney: (Watching the Tale of Despereaux with Owen is SO going to get me eliminated.)
  62.  
  63. Chris: The interns stuck in the Yukon are whores.
  64.  
  65. Izzy: Sarah from Ed, Edd n Eddy likes doing cartwheels.
  66. LeShawna: Is it fair of me to ask how you know that?
  67. Izzy: Yes; my penpal Jerry Marquis knows that!
  68. LeShawna: (It's good to relax with carrots.)
  69. Chris: Well, we're taking a stand, we're making a vow, this is the place, the moment is now, this is our golden opportunityyyyyyy!!!! The wishing star belongs...to...threeeeee!!!!
  70.  
  71. ______________________ ROCK AND ROLL MCDOOOOOONAAAAALD'S!
  72.  
  73. JÔ: Escucha me, Michael Storck.
  74. Duncan: Wait, are you serious? What did HE do?
  75. Geoff: Vaminos, man!
  76.  
  77. ______________________ Base Dos Skittles
  78.  
  79. Heather: Crap, I have to fart.
  80. Dakota: Taking a selfie with flowers should help.
  81. [Heather, tired of this, aims her paintball gun at her head.] I can't sustain my life anymore.
  82. Dakota: AHHHHHH NÃÃÃÃO Are you crazy?! ("Ugh!" Heather's suicide attempt will have to wait.)
  83. Heather: (Ugh, Dakota's so irritating! I just want to be alone to fight off my bipolar disorder.)
  84.  
  85. Chris: Dakota's running off to meet Elijah Castaneda, while the Vintage Vloggers tossed Roland Barrett.
  86.  
  87. Gwen: Did MAD's Advent Calendar say anything about Heather making parcels?
  88.  
  89. Lindsay: Achoo! I can't stop sneezing, Heather!
  90. Heather: Não, stop, you idiot, Lindsay. Otherwise, TurboTax will ship you off to the Democratic Republic of the Congo.
  91. Lindsay: Ok
  92.  
  93. _______________________Roland Barretts
  94.  
  95. Geoff: Say Bridgette, I have a crush on Andre Alcide.
  96. Bridgette: What the fuck? Really?!
  97. Geoff: Um...NO! I was joking!
  98. Bridgette: Oh Geoff, that is so illegal! [Captain Tomaday has been summoned!]
  99.  
  100. Gwen: I have Ebola!
  101. Geoff: I like rubbing my dick with vinegar when jacking off to Bridgette.
  102. Trent: Nããão [Entry of the Gladiators is his least favorite song.]
  103. Gwen: Trent! [Gets tired of Geoff] (Geoff is being annoying.)
  104.  
  105. __________________________ Skittles
  106.  
  107. Courtney: I still use Oovoo.
  108. [Izzy's favorite song is Apparitions by Brian Balmages] It's the New Era Izzy!
  109. Izzy: Yep, that's me!
  110. Courtney: Ahhhh [Gets kidnapped by the Denver Broncos.]
  111.  
  112. Chris: At ease, Chef?
  113. Chef: hahaha You don't boss me around no more.
  114. Chris: Shawty's like a melody in my head that I can't keep out, got me singing like, nananana every day, got my iPod stuck on replay...
  115.  
  116. ________________________ Roland Barretts
  117.  
  118. Zoey: What is this?
  119. Ezekiel: Looks like Cody is masturbating still.
  120. Cody: I'm masturbating to Izzy.
  121. Zoey: Why are you doing that?
  122. Ezekiel: That's not important; he's clearly mesmerized.
  123.  
  124. _________________________ Skittles
  125.  
  126. Lindsay: Hooooold meeeee, we're dancing in the dark of the ni-ight, we're shining like a neon light, I light you up when I get insiiiide!
  127. Heather: So won't you toooouch meeeee, 'cause everybody's watching us no-ow, we're putting on a show for the cro-owd, so turn it up baby make it looooud!
  128. Jô: You made an error.
  129. Heather: Lindsay, restrain me.
  130. Lindsay: Are you making a sacrifice?
  131. Heather: Yes, Emperor Lindsay.
  132. Jô: (sarcastically) Oh, my aching heart. [Shoots Lindsay]
  133. Heather: [Shoots Jo and her brand new car]
  134. Jô: Heather I swear to God!
  135. Lindsay: (Heather's gonna take me to San Salvador! EEE!!)
  136.  
  137. ___________________________ ROLAND BARRETTS
  138.  
  139. Duncan: Print, Play, Win, WOO!
  140. DJ: What is that?! I HATE that commercial!
  141. Duncan: Print, Play, Win, WOO!
  142. [DJ apparently is off his meds.]
  143. DJ: I want some scorching wings at Buffalo's! [Ah, I stand corrected!]
  144. Duncan: (Hahahahahaha that never gets old.)
  145.  
  146. ______________________ Skittles
  147.  
  148. Gwen: Imma let you know and keep it simple, tryna keep it up don't seem so simple, I just fucked two bitches 'fore I saw you, and you don't have to do it at my tempo.
  149.  
  150. Zoey: Dandelions are dandy!
  151. Ezekiel: Well I think... [Pulls out a tomato laced with saltimbocca.]
  152. Gwen: Can't you settle for less?
  153. Zoey: [Gets tired of Gwen]
  154. Cody: GWEEEEEEEN! I'M OUT OF PEOPLE TO JACK OFF TO!
  155.  
  156. Chris: The Fault in Our Stars is aggravating.
  157.  
  158. DJ: [Is seeking refuge in TV Tropes' headquarters with Courtney.] BRING BACK ISLA DE RIVALTE!
  159. Courtney: (How charming of DJ.)
  160. Duncan: Hahaha [Puts a tack on DJ's right arm.] The Aggro Crag still lives!
  161. Courtney: [I loved it when Veruca Salt went down the garbage chute.] Thomas from Regular Show is an idiot. (He's ridiculous, irritating, an idiot, annoying, and a delinquent.)
  162. Duncan: (Cara Delevingne is so hot!)
  163.  
  164. _____________________________Roland Barretts
  165.  
  166. Zoey: Man, Duncan sure is gritty, huh Cody?
  167. Cody: (obviously not paying attention) Uh huh.
  168.  
  169. Courtney: I can do a better job of getting Cody's attention than Zoey can!
  170.  
  171. Owen: I'm gonna board my house up. (They STILL won't stop playing Despacito!) Oh look, a mountain! [Looks up at the sky.] I miss you, Muhammed Ali!
  172. Courtney: Owen! He might actually come back! [Chases after Zoey in her Akira]
  173. Zoey: Penguins! [Runs away, causing Courtney to groan in frustration.]
  174. Cody: [Ejaculates on Owen]
  175. Owen: Al is the only person who can do that to me!
  176.  
  177. Chris: Hahaha I'm thinking of giving a Subaru to Cody, Heather, and LeShawna. Also, Roland Barrett's wife Linda has joined the Vintage Vloggers.
  178.  
  179. Gwen: I need room assistance.
  180. Courtney: I can bring you cheesecake! (Zoey would be BEGGING to be mesmerized by that.)
  181.  
  182. Heather: (Damn, a naked Leshawna!) That ass is certainly enormous.
  183. LeShawna: I'm more suave than Rico Suave. (Apparently options are limitless.)
  184.  
  185. Chris: Oh, so Cody's masturbating to Heather? He's supposed to be doing homework!
  186.  
  187. Bridgette: Why Cody Why?!
  188. Lindsay: Oh poor Heather...
  189.  
  190. Cody: Her vore is mine. [Runs out of ladies] TRENT! Come on, I need more, Trent!
  191. Heather: What the fuck?! [Attacks Cody]
  192.  
  193. Chris: It's safe to say Cody is fucked!
  194.  
  195. Heather: (I took a pill in Ibiza!)
  196.  
  197. Bridgette: Geoff, I'm breaking up with you because they won't let me bring hoes like you into the Alola region.
  198. Geoff: Mamaaaaaaaaa, ooooooooh...
  199.  
  200. ________________________________You're unbelievable.
  201.  
  202. Chris: AY YI YI YI YI YA, KEEP ON HOPING WE EAT CAKE, BY THE OCEAN! Jô, Bridgette, Duncan, Zoey, Ezekiel, LeShawna, Izzy, and the last Nissan Altima goes to...
  203. .
  204. .
  205. .
  206. .
  207. Geoff
  208.  
  209. Cody did you do your homework?
  210. Cody: Nah, crap.
  211. Chris: Seems like you should; it tells you the product of 2 and 16!
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