"1999 Help For Bishops Responding to Abuse" transcript

Dallin H. Oaks: Abuse in any form is sinful tragic and in total opposition to the teachings of the Saviour. It threatens the divine destiny of spirits sons and daughters of heavenly parents. Family members are responsible to prevent abuse and to get help for those who have been injured.

Bishop if you know or have caused to believe that someone has been abused or is in danger of being abused you have a serious responsibility. The Lord has appointed you to be a common judge in Israel through inspiration and discernment you can respond appropriately to the victims and perpetrators of abuse.

The surest path to preventing and healing abuse is through the application of the teachings of Jesus Christ. The Savior's love and healing power will ease burdens and provide strength to stop the abuse and to overcome adversities.

Now Bishop when you hear charges or confessions that a child a spouse or someone else has been abused,what do you do? First help those who may have been abused and protect those who may be vulnerable to future abuse. They need understanding and caring attention from inspired church leaders. You represent the Savior, assure them that he is aware of their needs and will bless them as they seek his help. Also reassure them of your love and support. In addition those who have committed the abuse need priesthood leaders to help them cease their abusive behavior, repent, and face the consequences of their immoral and illegal actions.

Bishop the word of the Lord and the teachings of his servants commit us to do all we can to protect children, to promote marital fidelity, and to strengthen the bonds between husband and wife and their children.

There are certain steps you should know and follow when responding to abuse. First, understand the doctrine. Second, recognize the possibilities of emotional, physical, or sexual abuse. Call the abuse helpline to help sort out the complex social emotional and changing legal issues surrounding abuse. Develop a specific plan of action and seek spiritual guidance and confirmation in implementing that plan. Finally, understand the legal requirements in your state province or country and follow the directions of the church handbook of instructions on church discipline.

Now Bishop, those are the major steps you should know and follow to prevent abuse and to protect the abused. Now let us explore each step in greater detail. Modern apostles and prophets have clearly declared that the commandments condemning abuse are centered upon the doctrine of the divine nature of the family.

Gordon B. Hinckley:
"We the First Presidency and the Council of the Twelve Apostles of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints solemnly proclaim that marries between a man and a woman is ordained of God, and that the family is central to the creator's plan for the eternal destiny of his children. All human beings, male and female, are created in the image of God each is a beloved spirit son or daughter of heavenly parents, and as such each has a divine nature and destiny. Husband and wife have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. Children are in heritage of the Lord. Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, to teach them to love and serve one another, to observe the commandments of God, and to be law-abiding citizens. Wherever they live, husbands and wives, mothers and fathers, will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations. Shame on any man or woman who would sexually abuse a child. In doing so the abuser not only does the most serious kind of injury, he or she also stands condemned before the Lord. It was the master himself who said but whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone stone were hanged about his neck and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea. How could he have spoken in stronger terms? I regret that there are some men undeserving of the love of their wives and children. There are children who fear their fathers and wives who fear their husbands. If there be any such within the hearing of my voice, as a servant of the Lord, I rebuke you and call you to repentance.

We warn that individuals who violate covenants of chastity who abuse spouse or offspring, or who fail to fulfill family responsibilities will one day stand accountable before God. Further, we warned that the disintegration of the family will bring upon individuals, communities, and nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets. We call upon responsible citizens and officers of government everywhere to promote those measures designed to maintain and strengthen the family as the fundamental unit of society."

Dallin H. Oaks:
Abuse is wrongly or improperly treating a child, wife, husband, or other person in a way that causes injury or offence. Abuse can take many forms some abuse is inadvertent or unknowing. Some is intentional, vicious, and violent. Abuse harms the body, deeply affects the mind, undermines faith and spirituality, and causes confusion, mistrust, guilt, and fear. Bishop, never minimized the seriousness of abuse.


Thomas S. Monson:
A physician revealed to me the large number of children who are brought to the emergency rooms of local hospitals in your city and mine. In many cases guilty parents provide fanciful accounts of the child falling from his highchair or stumbling over a toy
and striking his head. Altogether too frequently, it is discovered that the parent was the abuser and the innocent child the victim. shame on the perpetrators of such vile deeds.


Dallin H. Oaks:
There are many ways of recognizing the possibility of abuse. The victim may tell you, a witness may come forward, or the perpetrator may confess. Pay careful attention when someone tells you or tries to tell you about abuse, especially children. They may have been victimized by people they trust the most: a family member, a teacher, a friend, or a neighbor. Many victims, especially children, do not confide in their leaders because of fear that they will not be believed or maybe blamed. On the other hand some accusations involve false statements about abuse. Especially in the midst of marital contention, divorce proceedings, or child custody disputes.

Bishop, be prayerful when responding to accounts of abuse determining the truth is often very difficult and requires your special gift of discernment. You may not be able to get all the facts in an interview. Be certain that abuse is actually occurring. Seek inspiration and discernment to prevent innocent people from being hurt.

Sometimes persons will approach you with problems of abuse that took place many years ago. As they try to reconstruct childhood memories, they often have difficulty determining what actually happened. Memory is complex and may be unreliable. What actually happened may never be determined, but the present pain is real. Bishop, respond with respect, patience, kindness, and support.


Gordon B Hinckley:
We're teaching our people, we are talking about it, we have set up a course of instruction for our bishops, all across the nation. All last year we carried on an educational program, we've set up a helpline for them where they can get professional counseling and help with these problems.


Dallin H. Oaks:
Call the helpline when you believe there has been abuse and you need to talk with someone who can answer basic questions about this grievous problem.

Call the number on the screen (1-800-453-3860 Ext. 21911). This number can also be found in the brochure "Responding to Abuse"

Qualified professionals are available for consultation to help you provide appropriate guidance for the persons and families you're counseling. As you gather information on how to respond to each case of abuse, develop a specific plan of action and seek spiritual guidance and confirmation in implementing that plan. You have the right to inspiration to protect those who may be at risk and those who may have been abused.

Respond quickly but carefully to their needs and help them understand they are not to blame. assure them of your love and continued support. Help them understand the Savior's power to restore and heal them. Elder Richard G. Scott spoke of this in a conference address:


Richard G. Scott:
I speak from the depths of my heart to each one of you who have been scarred by the ugly sin of abuse. Unless healed by the Lord, mental, physical, or sexual abuse can cause you serious enduring consequences. As a victim, you have experienced some of them they include, fear, depression, guilt, self-hatred, destruction of self esteem, and alienation from normal human relationships. If you are now or have been abused: seek help.

Perhaps you distrust others and wonder if there's really any worthwhile help available. Begin with your Eternal Father and his beloved son, your savior. Strive to comprehend their commandments and follow them, and they will lead you to others who will strengthened and encouraged you. There is available to you a priesthood leader, normally a bishop, at times a member of a stake presidency. They will build bridges to greater understanding and healing.


Dallin H. Oaks:
Bishop, finding the appropriate response to the many physical, emotional, and legal problems associated with abuse can be very challenging. Study the circumstances and the facts as you understand them, then talk to your stake president. Your responsibilities also include helping the perpetrator stop the abuse, repent, and reform his or her life. This may be a long process it may involve church discipline, professional counseling, and even legal intervention

The first step is to stop the abuse so the sacred process of repentance can begin. Abuse in any form is a predatory and damning sin. If unrepented, it can stop the eternal progress of the perpetrator.

Call the helpline to verify that the reported actions constitute abuse. Call and find out if the law requires it to be reported to civil authorities. When reporting abuse is required, the helpline staff can help you decide things such as who should make the report. But remember bishop the helpline is not meant to preempt or replace your ecclesiastical responsibilities. You are the judge in Israel, and you must make the decisions. The helpline primarily assists you in obtaining technical information.

Abuse often causes serious emotional trauma when counseling and therapy are needed, they should always be provided in a manner consistent with the teachings of the Savior and the doctrines of the church. Therefore, when there must be a referral to a professional it should be to someone whose approach is in harmony with gospel principles.

When reporting abuse is required, the primary objective is to stop the abuse and get help for the victims, potential victims, and the perpetrator. Children are extremely vulnerable, that is why virtually all states and provinces now require the reporting of child abuse. However some states protect confidential communications between church members and their ecclesiastical leaders. Laws granting clergy privilege vary from state to state and change frequently. Therefore, once you become aware of child abuse you may need assistance determining whether the information is privileged to remain confidential or whether the law requires it to be reported to civil authorities. Keeping current on all these important legal issues is one of the responsibilities of legal counsel for the church. Let us listen to his advice:

Lance B. Wickman (General Counsel to the Church):
When a church leader discovers child abuse, many complex moral and legal issues are raised. What are the needs of the victim? Are there others at risk? Who else should know about the abuse? Is the information confidential or privileged or should it be reported to civil authorities? Bishop, call the helpline on child abuse cases even if you are familiar with the law. Its application in your state may vary from case to case depending on the facts and circumstances. When necessary the helpline will bring the church's legal counsel onto a conference call. They are very knowledgeable about child abuse reporting requirements throughout th eUnited States and Canada

(re-enactment of a call)
Bishop, your state law allows only a short period of time to report after you learn of abuse. I understand, but our main concern in reporting is not to be punitive, but to stop the abuse. Remember: that little child must be hurting and will continue to be at risk until he receives help (end of re-enactment of a call)

In some circumstances, you may wonder if it was just a passing phase of curiosity, but in every case think first of the victim. Most states require reporting if there is a reason to believe abuse has occurred. This allows the authorities to determine the facts of the level of abuse.

(re-enactment of a call)
President, those are the legal requirements in your state. We should also consider the broader issues. What is right for the victim of the family? Is there anyone else at risk? What does the perpetrator need to help him repent? Should anyone else know about this? (end of re-enactment of a call)

Keeping confidences is an important part of responding to abuse. If a member has communicated information to you in confidence about abuse, including a confession of abuse, you have a solemn duty to keep it confidential. However, if you encounter a situation where you believe that the duty of confidentiality may conflict with your state's child abuse reporting law or where you believe a child may be endangered by maintaining the confidence, please call a helpline promptly. Helpline personnel can assist you in finding a way to resolve your concerns.

If in the process of repentance it is necessary for the perpetrator to report himself or herself to the authorities, the perpetrator should be advised to seek legal counsel before reporting. If the report results in legal proceedings, you Bishop, should not attempt to influence any witness to give or withhold testimony. Nor should you testify yourself in any proceedings before consulting with the Church Office of Legal Services.


Dallin H. Oaks:
Remember Bishop: we have an obligation to help redeem the perpetrator too. Some feel remorse and are repentant. Others deny wrongdoing and try to shift the blame. Change is difficult particularly for repeat offenders. Many perpetrators express remorse, but few actually change until they experience the full cost quinces of their immoral and illegal actions.


Gordon B. Hinckley:
If there be any within the sound of my voice who may be guilty of such practice, I urge you with all of the capacity of which I am capable to stop it to run from it, to get help, to plead with the Lord for forgiveness, and make amends to those whom you have offended.


Dallin H. Oaks:
Encourage members who commit abuse to seek the Lord's forgiveness, forsake the transgression, and make restitution. Help them understand the atonement and develop spiritual strength to change their lives. This may include appropriate Church disciplinary action, complying with the requirements of the law, and very carefully chosen professional help from those who specialized in this treatment.

Church disciplinary action is generally postponed until after legal proceedings have been concluded. However, a bishop may impose immediate limitations on an abusive member by informal discipline.

Bishop, don't call a person to a position involving children or youth when that person is known to present some risk of misbehavior. Those who have abused one child may have abused others in the past and may still be likely to commit further abuse in the future. If a member suspected of child abuse moves out of your ward, send a request for contact form with the membership record. When the new bishop receives that record, he will contact you, and Bishop if you receive this request for contact form, please respond immediately

Now, in summary, please minister to the needs of the abused and protect those who may be in danger of being abused. Continue teaching that it is sinful, tragic, and in total opposition to the teachings of the Saviour to abuse a child, a spouse, or others.

As soon as you hear charges or confessions of abuse, your first responsibility is to help and protect the abuse.

Understand the doctrine condemning abuse, a grievous sin. Recognize the possibilities of emotional, physical, and sexual abuse. Even when you know what to do, consult your stake president without breaking confidences. Your stake president and the helpline can assist in sorting out the many complex social, emotional, and legal concerns such as

- How do we help the victim?
- Who else might be at risk?
- Do the victims or the perpetrator need professional help?
- Who else should know about the abuse to protect the victim and to reform the perpetrator?
- Does the law require that this abuse be reported to civil authorities? If so, who is responsible to make this report?

Your stake president and the helpline can assist you in resolving these important questions. Seek the guidance of the Spirit as you resolve these questions and develop a plan of action. Then prayerfully seek confirmation. Understand the legal requirements in your state province or country and follow the directions of the church handbook of instructions on discipline.

God bless you Bishop for helping those who often cannot help themselves. Bless you for trying to help perpetrators free themselves from the effects of their grievous sins.

Finally bishop, continue teaching that it is sinful, tragic, and in total opposition to the teachings of the Saviour to abuse a child, a spouse, or anyone else. There is great cleansing power in the atonement of Jesus Christ which is available to each transgressor upon conditions of repentance. There is also great healing power for the victims of abuse.

Jesus Christ is our redeemer. He is the son of God, the only begotten of the Father, who sacrificed himself that we might be clean. Of this I bear witness in the name of Jesus Christ amen.