Fatanon 6

>Day 20 in Equestria.
>Just got done with your morning routine like a fucking boss.
>Dash couldn't make it this morning, something about some douchebag named Thunderlane ducking out of work.
>So you went on your run by yourself.
>The walk back to Twilight's library without Dash gives you way too much time to think.
>Way too much time to remember what life was like in your world.
>Your parents and friends probably think you're dead. Honestly, even just thinking about it like this makes you feel regret.
>Regret for what? You don't know. It's not YOUR fault you got transported to some world filled with ponies.
>Hell, for all you know that asphalt chunk sent you into a coma and this is all just some fucked up dream.
>No, that would be a retarded plot twist. A dream wouldn't be this vivid, even in a coma. Comas probably didn't allow for enough brain activity to dream anyways.
>So what is this?
>Magic?
>You've seen Twilight preform magic several times; everything from teleportation to floating a book down that she wanted to read. Every time she does it you can't help but think it's amazing.
>You've never seen anything bend the fabric of space and time, though. Not to mention, Twilight has pretty much confirmed you didn't get here through magical means.
>No matter how much you rack your brain you can't think of anything.
>You are not a dumb man, but you're not Steven Hawking either.
>Hell, you doubt even THAT crazy wheelchair/man hybrid could figure this shit out.
>Poor guy's head would probably blow up the minute he saw a pegasus land on a cloud.
>You're halfway back to the library now, and looking forward to a nice bath and a delicious lunch.
>"Heya Nonny! What's up?"
>Suddenly pink.
>Pink everywhere, bouncing around you.
"Hey Pinkie."
>"You look like you're thinking about something. Is it something super important? Ooooo, you look like you've lost a bit of weight, good job!"
"Thanks, and I'm not thinking about much, just how I got here."
>Pinkie frowns for a moment, then leaps to you and gives you a hug. After a moment she pulls back and lands on her hooves again, "You looked like you needed that."
>You kind of did.
"So what's the word?"
>"The word? I don't know what the word is. Is this a guessing game where I have to guess the word? I'm not very good at guessing games, but I can try my best!"
>You can't help but laugh.
>This mare, right here.
"No Pinkie, I was just asking what's up."
>She gives you an incredulous look, "Up? the sky is up you silly filly! Unless you're hanging upside down, then it's the ground. Does it matter which way you're facing in space?"
"How do you even know about space?"
>"Duh! It's all in Twilight's super awesome library. You should seriously try reading some time."
"I prefer digital entertainment."
>"Digiwhat now?"
>This is getting you nowhere. Talking to Pinkie is like smacking your head into a brick wall and expecting the wall to crumble under the force of your mighty face.
>Still, talking to her makes you feel better.
>It's almost like she knew you were troubled and came to put a smile on your face.
"Hey Pinkie?"
>"Hm?"
"Thanks."
>"No problem Nonny."
>She doesn't even ask what you thanked her for.
---------
>One bath later and you're chilling out with Twi in the library, helping her sort books.
"Where's Spike been these past couple of days?"
>Twilight picks up a book from the top of a small stack and starts flipping through it absentmindedly, "I sent him to Canterlot. The Princess needs him to help with a few things, and when she's done the seven of us will be heading to Canterlot as well."
"So I finally get to meet the princess huh?"
>Twilight smiles, "Excited?"
"More nervous than excited."
>"Hahaha, don't be. She just wants to speak with you. Speaking of which, I have a favor to ask."
"Oh?"
>"I know you've already told me a lot about your world: The political structure, wars, charities, poor people, rich people, and a lot of other stuff. Do you think you can organize all the information you have?"
"How would I do this?"
>"I could help you, but the easiest way would be to make graphs, a timeline of what you remember, and a paper covering what you know."
"What's the point of all this?"
>"Well, you're here, aren't you? Think of it like this, in the millions of years our world will still be around you probably aren't going to be the last human we meet. In fact, if we manage to get you back to your world that opens up a whole new avenue of possibilities."
"Wait, you want to go to Earth? That's not such a good idea."
>"Why not?"
"Because for every person that would want to study your world and negotiate with the ponies or griffons or whatever, there will be one more who doesn't accept new things. Humanity doesn't have a very good history with things that are different."
>"Hm."
"Don't get me wrong. I love my planet, but you guys... you wouldn't really fit in there."
>"I see. Regardless, I'm pretty sure the Princesses will be wise enough to do as you say, at least until it's safe."
"If you say so."
>"It could be a thousand years before our species TRULY interact with each other, but isn't it better to get a little bit of a head start now?"
>You sigh. She has a good point.
"Alright, consider it done."
>Twilight lets out a squeal of delight, and jumps up to wrap you in a hug, >"Thank you thank you thank you!"
>'Heart?'
What's up guy?
>'Stop sending blood to my face.'
lolumad
>Then you hear the thunder, and Twilight's hug becomes a vice grip.
"Twi... can't... breathe..."
>She jumps back down, looking slightly ashamed of herself, "Sorry, I forgot that a storm was scheduled for today."
"Ha, don't worry about it."
>The patter of the rain on the rooftop starts, and you let out a sigh.
"God I love that sound."
>Twilight smiles, "Me too."
"Hey Twi?"
>"Hm?"
"I thought you said you couldn't get me home."
>"I did, and it's true, but that doesn't mean I'm going to stop looking for a way. Even if it has to be less... conventional."
"That's... thank you."
>"Heh, no problem."
>A knock on the door interrupts the conversation. You follow Twilight to the door, and when she opens it with her magic...
>There's Dash, a saddlebag on her back, soaked to the bone with a shit eating grin on her face.
>'Boner pls go, it hasn't even been a month since I saw a human female.'
Keyword being "saw".
>'Shut the fuck up brain, no one asked you.'
>"Heya Big Guy, Twi. Can I come in?"
>Twilight is grinning now too, "Sure thing, I'll grab a towel for you."
>"Thanks a bunch Twi. Cloud Kicker started the storm ten minutes early, so I ended up getting soaked. I'm gonna friggin' kill her."
>Dash steps in and kicks the door closed behind her. She stands there, still soaked from the rain, waiting on a towel.
>You clear your throat awkwardly.
>"Something wrong Big Guy?"
"Nope, everything is totally a-okay."
>"You sure?"
>You remind yourself that you're too fat for a girlfriend, at least for now.
>Wait... that isn't the issue here!
>She's a fucking horse!
"Yep, totally fine."
>"Good," she says with a laugh, "Because the three of us are getting shit faced tonight." She nudges the saddle bag gently off her back and to the floor.
>You hear bottles clinking inside of it.
>whatabro.gif