The Black Knight Rides Again! Issue #?

>This was it
>The moment you'd been raised for
>The chance to make a name for yourself
>You-
>"We ready tah move, boss?"
>-can'tfuckingmonologuewiththeseidiots!
>That's you
>You're the boss
>Not, like, your name is The Boss, but you are one
>Your real, civilian name was Fem a'Non
>That's... wildly unimportant information
>Please forget I said my real name
>Wait, shit, calm down
>Breathe
>Answer the goon

>You adjust the yellow and black stripes of your tabard, smoothing out imaginary wrinkles to calm yourself as you speak through your helmet's headset, a sharp, metallic sound thanks the voice changer near your throat
"You may begin the festivities, and remember-"
>"Yeah yeah, be loud, be flashy, don't hurt nobody we don't gotta. 'S ain't our first smash 'n grab."
>Your eyes narrow as the goons laugh, the sounds of their automatic weapons easily heard, even through the back of the van
>Disrespect
>That's what you get for hiring from the local college
>But you could deal with it for now, you think, mounting your motorcycle and counting down in your head
>5
>4
>3
>2
>1
>Because soon everyone would know the name of-
>You gun the engine, the motorcycle under you carrying you speedily out the double-doors of the van and up the building's steps
>Your blackened armor easily deflects the shards of glass as you smash through the museum doors, coming to a screeching stop past the information desk, your goons taking it as their cue to say-
>"THE BLACK KNIGHT!"

>Damn right you are
>Not the first, certainly
>Nobody knew who the first Black Knight was, the one who had originally wielded the Ebony Blade you carry
>But everyone knew the legend
>Your family certainly did
>Dating back centuries, countless a'Non's before you had wielded the title and the Blade
>It was traditional family supervillainy
>And now it was your turn, after dear old dad lost it, thinking he was an actual knight and tried to slay the "dragon" the Hulk
>From Black Knight to red smear...
>But that wouldn't happen to you!
>You were going to be different!
>You knew you could control the Blade!
>S-So what if literally every Knight before you had been driven totally crazy by it and gotten themselves killed...
>Y-Yeah...
>"Uh, boss?"
>Your head goon's voice snaps you back from the internal history lesson
>Right, middle of your name-making heist
>Keep on task
>Your grip tightens on the hilt of your mystical sword as you stride through the frightened crowd, a comforting reminder of your duty to your family
"Videt praedam..."
>"Huh?"
>You whirl to face him, crimson shoulder-cape flapping through the air-conditioned breeze
"Never you mind. Take from the peasants what you like, but find that crown!"
>The crown...
>The whole reason why you were here
>Sure, you could make more money from robbing a bank, but it was the principal of the thing!
>How many villains made their name by stealing a crown that might have belonged to King Arthur!
>Fucking with that guy was your family's thing!
>Well, maybe not your family specifically, but there was historical president for it!
>And there it is...
>It's...
"Smaller, than I expected..."
>And a lot less gold-and-jewels...
>You raise your sword, still in its scabbard, and smash the case open with the hilt, getting your gauntleted hands on the circlet

>Looking up from your reflection in the dull sheen, you jerk your head to the goons who are busying themselves with smashing artifacts and setting fire to a few information pamphlets
>Nice
"We got what we came for, let's go before any capes show up."
>The fall in soon enough
>It was almost a shame, really
>Any proper supervillain would have run into a hero during their debut
>Some banter, some fighting, maybe they recapture your score and beat up your thugs at the cost of letting you get away...
>Just like those stories dad used to tell you when you were a little girl
>He'd used to tell you about his first fight with-
>'THWIP!'
>Huh?
>Within moments, your hired muscle is pinned to the floor and walls of the museum lobby by...
>Webbing.
>Looks like you were gonna get your wish
>Okay, breathe deep, don't panic
>You were trained to fight supers practically from birth
>Even if it was one of the most famous of them all
>Spider...
"Girl...?"
>Yep, sure enough, clinging to the ceiling in a costume that had no business being that tight without  riding up something fierce was the rule 63 version of New Yoke's infamous Spider-Man
>The universe had a weird sense of humor
>Still, make due with what you have

>With one hand resting on the hilt of the Blade hanging at your side, you strike a practiced pose and laugh haughtily
"I was wondering when one of you knaves would show up. Though I was hoping for someone a bit more... known. Ohohohohoho~!"
>"Seriously? I'm at least dressed like someone people know, not a knock-off Kylo Ren."
"Oho? A girl after my own heart. But enough banter!"
>You draw your sword with a flourish, its cursed blade leaving a smoky trail through the air
>She responds by slinging more webbing, though you cut it down easily, striking another pose after the barrage
"You'll have to do better than that to best the Black Knight! Ohohohoh-ack!"
>Her response is... remarkably straight-forward, kicking off the wall to pounce on you
>Your expert flailing only does so much to dissuade the flurry of blow raining down on you, but even she's forced back after a few near-misses with your wildly swinging blade hissing through the air like a viper
>With a metallic roar, you quickly close the distance she continually creates, hacking the air with angry swings
"You BITCH! I just had this armor polished!"
>This suit was expensive!
>Even as she flips and ducks, the irritating arachnid still has time to quip
>"Woah there, Dork Vader, to the Dark Side, hatred leads."
>A snarf tears from your throat and you take another wild swing, intent of removing that clever mouth from her face
>Only to cut your bike in half
"Dammit!"
>That was ALSO expensive!
>Unfortunately, she takes your lapse in focus to deliver an uppercut that separates you from the Ebony Blade
>You also think you hear a faint "Shoryuken!"

>... Bitch...
>You look up in time to see the tit-less wonder web down your weapon and then you, placing a quick call to the guard-er, police about the situation with the information desk phone
>Her mistake
>Closing your eyes, you focus on the Blade, the cold surety of its weight in you hand, and by the time you open them it's returned to you
>Without a glance to your similarly trapped cronies, you cut yourself free and run for the van out front, Spider-girl none the wiser
>Best to cut your insignificant losses
>Starting up the van, you take off down the street, back to your temporary base of operations
>Along the way you carefully take off your helmet, freeing your sweaty face and pony-tailed hair
>You toy with the crown in your lap, absently smiling as the sun glints off its aged finish
>Your first score
>Your first hero battle
>Your first escape
>Fist pump!
>Yeah, you're going to be the best Black Knight ever!

"Ohohohohoho!"