In which Lily heals her demons

<yzabtech[DM]> ==START==
<yzabtech[DM]> ((your last post: I fly up to try to keep distance between me and... other-me. Then, I look to see if I can find any weak spots, or learn anything else helpful about her.
<yzabtech[DM]> Rolled 17, +17 perception mod, so 34))
<yzabtech[DM]> There are no weak spots. She's you.
<Lily_Miller> "You're another version of me, right?"
<yzabtech[DM]> "Are you done talking to your 'friend'?" she says to you.
<yzabtech[DM]> "In a way, yes."
<yzabtech[DM]> She sounds like you.
<Lily_Miller> "In a way?"
<yzabtech[DM]> "Yes. Your shadow, the thoughts that linger within your head that shall soon consume you."
<Lily_Miller> "So you're my demons, then."
<Lily_Miller> "That's different that the mirror-mes, at least."
<Lily_Miller> "Those were... not fun."
<yzabtech[DM]> "It was definitely fun for the audience."
<Lily_Miller> "What audience?"
<Lily_Miller> "The Horrorterrors?"
<yzabtech[DM]> "Every show needs an audience, Lily," Shadow-Lily says, as she motions to the sky. Through the darkness, you see hundreds of eldritch, grotesque, tentacled monstrosities, with eyes that seem to be looking at you.
<yzabtech[DM]> Roll sanity.
<Lily_Miller> !roll 1d20+7
<yzabtech[DM]> ((crap the dicebot isn't here))
<Lily_Miller> ((whoops))
* NOTTyche[Dice] (~NOTTycheD@pool-96-246-198-135.nycmny.fios.verizon.net) has joined
<yzabtech[DM]> ((here we go))
<Lily_Miller> !roll 1d20+7
<NOTTyche[Dice]> (1d20+7) [2+7] : {9}
<yzabtech[DM]> Their eyes seem to pierce through your brain. You lose a bit of your will to fight.
<Lily_Miller> "So that's why you're here, Gertrude."
<Lily_Miller> "To make this entertaining for them"
<yzabtech[DM]> "You and I both know that I am not Gertrude."
<Lily_Miller> "But you're not me, either."
<yzabtech[DM]> "It was a coping mechanism designed by the psychopathic friend of yours to preserve your sanity, and your feelings."
<Lily_Miller> "That doesn't mean you can't be Gertrude, though."
<Lily_Miller> "You deserve a name, too."
<yzabtech[DM]> "I have no name but Lily," Shadow-Lily says, unaware of the existence of the narrator calling her Shadow-Lily.
<Lily_Miller> "Just because you have my name, doesn't mean you're me."
<Lily_Miller> "A part of me, yeah. But not *me*."
<yzabtech[DM]> "That is correct. In some metaphysical way, I am you, but no, I am not you as in..."
<yzabtech[DM]> "Let's not discuss what the self truly means."
<yzabtech[DM]> "There have been many other discussions about the very same topic, and none of them have come to any reasonable conclusion."
<Lily_Miller> "That's fair."
<Lily_Miller> "So you're here to entertain, but why?"
<yzabtech[DM]> "What other purpose would you have?"
<yzabtech[DM]> "Creating a new universe is obviously off the list."
<Lily_Miller> "But why?"
<Lily_Miller> "If you know about Lyra, then you know about Tadpal."
<Lily_Miller> "We haven't lost yet, and we're not going to."
<Lily_Miller> "...I hope."
<yzabtech[DM]> "You hope."
<yzabtech[DM]> "Exactly."
<Lily_Miller> "...What do you mean?"
<yzabtech[DM]> "You hope you're going to win."
<yzabtech[DM]> "That doesn't mean you're going to."
<Lily_Miller> "It doesn't mean we can't win, either."
<Lily_Miller> "And after everything we've been through... I think winning is a lot more likely."
<yzabtech[DM]> "You mean everything you've been through, designed to put on a show for an audience? Wake up, Lily. You're facing the real deal."
<Lily_Miller> "So you're saying that everything that happened before wasn't real?"
<Lily_Miller> "It felt real to me."
<Lily_Miller> "And if you're me, then you should know that already."
<yzabtech[DM]> "Oh, of course it was to you. But what is real anymore?"
<Lily_Miller> "This is, apparently."
<Lily_Miller> "Or at least you think it is, Gertrude."
<Lily_Miller> "But why do you think this is more real than anything else we've done so far?"
<yzabtech[DM]> "Your adventure before this was a pre-planned standard SABATH instance. You're now up against practical deities."
<Lily_Miller> "Practical deities who haven't done anything to our session directly."
<Lily_Miller> "Zach and Kara both went Grimdark, and Jonah..."
<Lily_Miller> "...I'm not sure what he did, exactly."
<yzabtech[DM]> "Jonah was such an interesting case."
<yzabtech[DM]> "He was so desperate for his own desires, he jeopardized the entire session."
<yzabtech[DM]> "From your perspective of course."
<yzabtech[DM]> "From ours, it was but an added twist!"
<Lily_Miller> "I really doubt he knew that he was going to doom us all."
<Lily_Miller> "It's not his fault."
<yzabtech[DM]> "He accepted the deal. He followed his orders."
<yzabtech[DM]> "It's his fault and you know it."
<Lily_Miller> "Did that... thing tell him what he was going to do when they made the deal?"
<Lily_Miller> "Everyone makes mistakes/"
<yzabtech[DM]> "Of course not. It would ruin the twist!"
<Lily_Miller> "So he didn't know what he was getting into."
<yzabtech[DM]> "He was told he was to follow orders given to him. He accepted."
<Lily_Miller> "Not. His. Fault."
<yzabtech[DM]> "He was told to interrupt the ritual. He accepted."
<yzabtech[DM]> "I assume you all knew that the ritual was to save the session."
<yzabtech[DM]> "He knew exactly what he was doing. We just didn't have to tell him."
<Lily_Miller> "...So he made a mistake, that's true."
<Lily_Miller> "But whatever it was planning, it still didn't happen."
<Lily_Miller> "We're all still here, and it didn't sound very happy that it's plan didn't work."
<Lily_Miller> "What matters is what Jonah does now. What he does to help fix it."
<Lily_Miller> "Because everyone deserves a second chance."
<yzabtech[DM]> "Do they?"
<Lily_Miller> "Yes."
<Lily_Miller> "They do."
<yzabtech[DM]> "Does Stalin deserve a second chance?"
<Lily_Miller> "...What do you mean?"
<yzabtech[DM]> "Everyone deserves 'a second chance'."
<yzabtech[DM]> "Does Stalin deserve one?"
<Lily_Miller> "A second chance doesn't mean no consequences for what they did before."
<Lily_Miller> "Also, he's dead."
<Lily_Miller> "Dead people... they don't have anything left to try."
<Lily_Miller> "They're gone."
<yzabtech[DM]> "Just like your comrades?"
<yzabtech[DM]> half of your*
<Lily_Miller> "...Yeah."
<Lily_Miller> "And everyone on every version of Earth that was destroyed when we came into this game."
<Lily_Miller> "There's... a lot of dead people."
<yzabtech[DM]> "Correct."
<Lily_Miller> "And you're trying to add to that."
<yzabtech[DM]> Shadow-Lily grins.
<Lily_Miller> "Wow, Gertrude, that's kind of creepy."
<Lily_Miller> "...Sorry, that was mean."
<yzabtech[DM]> "Your coping mechanism doesn't seem to be working."
<yzabtech[DM]> "What if your psychopathic friend is next?"
<Lily_Miller> "Why aren't you using her name?"
<Lily_Miller> "And she won't be."
<Lily_Miller> "She's stronger than that."
<yzabtech[DM]> "To drive home a point."
<yzabtech[DM]> "What makes you think she's not using you?"
<Lily_Miller> "Why would she be?"
<Lily_Miller> "There isn't much she could use me for, anyway."
<yzabtech[DM]> "Hell, it could just be for fun."
<Lily_Miller> "She's not like that."
<Lily_Miller> "She wouldn't just... use me."
<Lily_Miller> "Lyra is my best friend, and you should know that."
<yzabtech[DM]> "Who makes a best friend through the internet?"
<yzabtech[DM]> "What was your life like before the game?"
<Lily_Miller> "Shouldn't you know that?"
<Lily_Miller> "You're me, after all."
<Lily_Miller> "But it was... lonely."
<Lily_Miller> "All of my friends were through the internet, but I wasn't very close to most of them."
<Lily_Miller> "Father was away most of the time, so my only real-life friend was Bubby."
<Lily_Miller> "...I still miss that dog."
<yzabtech[DM]> "Great sob story. Beautiful. Tell it to the audience."
<Lily_Miller> "Oh, hush."
<Lily_Miller> "So you're supposed to be my inner demons, right?"
<yzabtech[DM]> "You're saying you met more friends AFTER the game than you did before?"
<Lily_Miller> "They're much closer friends."
<Lily_Miller> "It's quality over quantity, I guess."
<Lily_Miller> "Are you just here to make me feel bad?"
<yzabtech[DM]> "It's almost pathetic that you found closer friends in a death game than you ever did in your former world."
<yzabtech[DM]> "I'm here to make you face yourself."
<yzabtech[DM]> "More than you have before."
<Lily_Miller> "By making me feel bad."
<Lily_Miller> "That's not very nice, Gertrude."
<yzabtech[DM]> "Should I care?"
<Lily_Miller> "I would."
<Lily_Miller> "And you're a part of me."
<Lily_Miller> "You should know I just want to help people."
<yzabtech[DM]> Shadow-Lily's hands seem to glitch out of existence, before regenerating.
<Lily_Miller> "And you're not helping anyone."
<Lily_Miller> "...What was that?"
<Lily_Miller> I point at the hand that glitched.
<yzabtech[DM]> "What are you doing to me?"
<Lily_Miller> "Just talking to you."
<yzabtech[DM]> "I shall not let you gain the upper hand."
<yzabtech[DM]> "Pun not intended!"
<Lily_Miller> "Pun totally intended!"
<Lily_Miller> "You're me, of course it was."
<Lily_Miller> I grin at her.
<yzabtech[DM]> "IS THIS INTENDED TO YOU?!"
<yzabtech[DM]> Shadow-Lily materializes a rifle, that looks exactly like yours.
<Lily_Miller> "So you're not me, then."
<Lily_Miller> "Because I wouldn't pull my gun on someone unarmed."
<Lily_Miller> "Especially if they were trying to talk."
<yzabtech[DM]> "aaaaAAAAARGH--" Shadow-Lily's head fades, and rematerializes.
<Lily_Miller> "You're really not me, are you?"
<Lily_Miller> "You're just something created to hurt me, to use my weaknesses against me."
<yzabtech[DM]> Her arms momentarily disappear, as the gun falls out of her hands, and cracks into fragments.
<Lily_Miller> "Gary, you're just a shadow."
<Lily_Miller> "I know I have problems, and I try to deal with them the best I can."
<yzabtech[DM]> "My name's...not...GARY!" Shadow-Lily screams as she attempts to rematerialize a gun.
<Lily_Miller> "But that isn't what this is."
<Lily_Miller> "You live off of my problems."
<Lily_Miller> "...Off me thinking you're the same as I am."
<yzabtech[DM]> !roll 1d20+7
<NOTTyche[Dice]> (1d20+7) [5+7] : {12}
<Lily_Miller> "But you're not."
<yzabtech[DM]> She almost materializes a gun, but the gun seems to fade in and out of existence.
<Lily_Miller> "You're further away from being me than the mirror-mes were, and they couldn't even talk."
<yzabtech[DM]> "How DARE you compare me to a game construct!"
<Lily_Miller> "I'm sorry that you were created like this. You don't have a choice in any of it, do you?"
<Lily_Miller> "You're just going through the steps, doing whatever those things tell you."
<Lily_Miller> "...Are you okay?"
<Lily_Miller> I notice that she's getting more unstable as I talk more.
<Lily_Miller> "That... doesn't look good, Gertrude."
<yzabtech[DM]> "MY NAME'S NOT GERTRUDE!"
<yzabtech[DM]> "I shall not listen to your words!"
<Lily_Miller> "Then what is it?"
<Lily_Miller> "Because it's certainly not Lily"
<yzabtech[DM]> "It's Lily--"
<Lily_Miller> "No, it's not."
<yzabtech[DM]> "I've had enough of you. Prepare to die!" When the gun fades back into existence, she fires a single shot.
<yzabtech[DM]> Time seems to slow down.
<yzabtech[DM]> The bullet is glitching in and out of reality.
<Lily_Miller> I stand my ground.
<yzabtech[DM]> The bullet passes straight through you, without any harm done.
<Lily_Miller> She's not real, she doesn't have any power over me if I don't let her.
<yzabtech[DM]> "What--what have you--"
<Lily_Miller> "See? You can't do anything to me if I don't let you."
<Lily_Miller> "I know I have demons to face, but they can't hurt me if I don't give them the chance."
<Lily_Miller> "And... that includes you. Sorry, Gertrude."
<yzabtech[DM]> "Even without a weapon--"
<yzabtech[DM]> "You still manage to be strong...."
<yzabtech[DM]> Shadow-Lily collapses to her knees.
<yzabtech[DM]> Strike her down.
<Lily_Miller> I fly over to her, sympathy in my eyes.
<Lily_Miller> "I'm really sorry it had to be like this."
<Lily_Miller> "You deserved a choice too, you know."
<Lily_Miller> "I... don't want to kill you."
<yzabtech[DM]> "Why?"
<Lily_Miller> "Because you didn't choose to do this."
<Lily_Miller> "That thing made you do it."
<yzabtech[DM]> "No...this is what I was meant for...."
<Lily_Miller> "You're not me, but that doesn't mean you can't be your own person."
<Lily_Miller> I have an idea.
<Lily_Miller> "Can I try something?"
<yzabtech[DM]> "W-what will you do...."
<Lily_Miller> "I don't know if it would work, though."
<Lily_Miller> "I want to go into your mind, and see if I can help."
<Lily_Miller> "Help you be your own person, I mean."
<yzabtech[DM]> "Go ahead, it wouldn't...."
<Lily_Miller> "It might. And that's a chance I'd like to take."
<Lily_Miller> I reach out to her mind, looking for something that could help.
<yzabtech[DM]> You reach out to her mind.
<yzabtech[DM]> It's yours.
<yzabtech[DM]> Heal it.
<Lily_Miller> Taking in a deep breath, I focus on every aspect of her mind that needs healing.
<Lily_Miller> She can have a choice if I do it right, and that's something worth doing.
<yzabtech[DM]> The more healing you do, the more she seems to fade.
<yzabtech[DM]> She starts to cry.
<Lily_Miller> I flinch at her crying, but I push onward, trying to be as gentle as I can be.
<Lily_Miller> She never deserved this.
<yzabtech[DM]> As you push onward, she seems to fade more.
<Lily_Miller> "I'm sorry..." I say, just loud enough for hear. I hope it doesn't hurt.
<Lily_Miller> "I'm sorry I couldn't help you."
<Lily_Miller> I keep trying to heal her mind.
<yzabtech[DM]> "I don't think it's working..." Shadow-Lily says between sobs.
<yzabtech[DM]> "Why are you being nice to me?"
<Lily_Miller> "Because you deserve it."
<Lily_Miller> "It's not your fault that thing is making you do this."
<Lily_Miller> "You deserve a chance to be something more, to make your own choices."
<yzabtech[DM]> "But...it was what I was created for...."
<yzabtech[DM]> "Why...?"
<yzabtech[DM]> "I don't think I'll ever be able to have that chance."
<Lily_Miller> "So?"
<Lily_Miller> "People can be more than what they were created for."
<Lily_Miller> "You shouldn't have to be forced to just follow the steps laid out for you."
<Lily_Miller> "No person should."
<yzabtech[DM]> Shadow-Lily keeps crying.
<yzabtech[DM]> "It's not going to happen."
<yzabtech[DM]> "I'm just your shadow."
<Lily_Miller> "Why are you so sure?"
<yzabtech[DM]> "You're the one who deserves a chance."
<Lily_Miller> "Do you want to be something more?"
<Lily_Miller> "We both do, Gertrude."
<yzabtech[DM]> "I can't."
<yzabtech[DM]> "I can't be something more."
<Lily_Miller> "We both know you're not me, so you're already someone else."
<Lily_Miller> "Can you not see that?"
<Lily_Miller> "Do you want to be something more than a shadow?"
<Lily_Miller> "Some*one* more?"
<yzabtech[DM]> "Maybe, but...I can't be, and you understand that."
<Lily_Miller> "Who says you can't be?"
<Lily_Miller> "Those things out there?"
<yzabtech[DM]> "You tried to heal me, and...and I'm just fading...."
<Lily_Miller> "They can't do anything in this session without help."
<Lily_Miller> "Hmm..." There has to be something I can do to help her.
<Lily_Miller> I reach into her mind again, this time looking for something, anything, that isn't a shadow of something else.
<Lily_Miller> There has to be something that's just Gertrude in there.
<yzabtech[DM]> Despite everything, it's still you.
<Lily_Miller> "Oh..."
<Lily_Miller> "Maybe..." I think for a second. "Gertrude, do you really want to be able to be your own person?"
<Lily_Miller> "Yes or no only, please."
<Lily_Miller> "It's hard, it really is. But maybe if you don't just give up hope, if you have some determination..."
<Lily_Miller> "If you have something that's just you, even if it's just that determination, maybe it will work."
<Lily_Miller> "And... I guess you know as well as I do that I'm a crazy, idealistic nutcase."
<Lily_Miller> "So maybe, together, we can get it to work."
<yzabtech[DM]> "I don't think I can be my own person. I'm just a fragment."
<yzabtech[DM]> "Maybe...maybe I could be part of you...."
<Lily_Miller> "Do you want that?"
<yzabtech[DM]> "It would be best for both of us."
<Lily_Miller> "Okay."
<Lily_Miller> "I'll try."
<Lily_Miller> I reach out to her one more time, and try to figure out how to do this for her.
<yzabtech[DM]> "Just...continue healing."
<Lily_Miller> Giving her a comforting smile, I start to heal her again.
<yzabtech[DM]> Shadow-Lily sobs, but this time with tears of joy.
<yzabtech[DM]> "Thank you..." she says, as she fades for the last time.
<yzabtech[DM]> You feel at peace.
<Lily_Miller> I smile, knowing that I could at least help her be happy one time.
<Lily_Miller> She deserved better than what those things made her to be.
<yzabtech[DM]> The fog around you seems to lighten, and you see other people fighting their own demons.
<yzabtech[DM]> Their fights.
<yzabtech[DM]> You see Jonah humming a victory tune, and Axel waiting.
<Lily_Miller> I look over at everyone still fighting, knowing I'll be there if they need me. But those are there fights, and I can't help them with them right now.
<yzabtech[DM]> Level up to rank 30.
<Lily_Miller> I feel a bit bad that I couldn't help her more, but at least she got to choose her own way out.
<Lily_Miller> And now she's a part of me, too.
<yzabtech[DM]> Within you, you can feel Shadow-Lily, and although she was your inner demons, now she's inner peace.
<yzabtech[DM]> ==END==