Advertisement
Not a member of Pastebin yet?
Sign Up,
it unlocks many cool features!
- [23:15] L: :-):-):-)The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate
- father to start their family. On the day the surrogate father was to
- arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife and said, "I'm off. The man should be
- here soon" Half an hour later, just by chance a door-to-door baby
- photographer rang the doorbell, hoping to make a sale.
- "Good morning, madam. I've come to...."
- "Oh, no need to explain. I've been expecting you," Mrs. Smith cut in.
- "Really?" the photographer asked. "Well, good. I've made a speciality of
- babies"
- "That's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat"
- After a moment, she asked, blushing, "Well, where do we start?"
- "Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the
- couch and perhaps a couple on the bed. Sometimes the living room floor is
- fun too; you can really spread out!"
- "Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work for Harry and me"
- "Well, madam, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But, if we
- try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven different
- angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results"
- "My, that's a lot of....." gasped Mrs. Smith.
- "Madam, in my line of work, a man must take his time. I'd love to be in
- and out in five minutes, but you'd be disappointed with that, I'm sure"
- "Don't I know it," Mrs. Smith said quietly.
- The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his
- baby pictures.
- [23:15] L: "This was done on the top of a bus in downtown London"
- "Oh my God!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed, tugging at her handkerchief.
- "And these twins turned out exceptionally well, when you consider their
- mother was so difficult to work with"
- "She was difficult?" asked Mrs. Smith.
- "Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to Hyde Park to get the job
- done right. People were crowding around four and five deep, pushing to get
- a good look"
- "Four and five deep?" asked Mrs. Smith, eyes widened in amazement.
- "Yes," the photographer said, "And for more than three hours too. The
- mother was constantly squealing and yelling. I could hardly concentrate.
- Then darkness approached and I began to rush my shots. Finally, when the
- squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just packed it all in."
- Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "You mean squirrels actually chewed on your,
- um......equipment?"
- "That's right. Well, madam, if you're ready, I'll set up my tripod so we
- can get to work."
- "Tripod?????"
- "Oh yes, I have to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big for
- me to hold for very long. Madam? Madam? ....... Good Lord, she's
- fainted!!"
Advertisement
Add Comment
Please, Sign In to add comment
Advertisement