Thread 11: Stories 31-45

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>Chyrsalis
'Cadence'
"SA"
~Various Guests~
~~~~~

'Aren't you going to stop her?'

"Sure, right after I run over the mountains in the distance, jump into the air and slam the sun into a giant net to win the big game."

'...So no?'

~Is it true you fought a fifty foot tall robot with hoof to hoof?~

>Don't be silly, I just winked at it and it died.

~Could you REALLY see through all of time?~

>Nah, just most of it.

~About how tall did you supersize? Did your head really stick into space?~

>Nothing like that at all! Just a few feet higher than the castle, really.

~And you did it all by yourself?~

>No, the screams of the brave soldiers defending the place drove me on.

~Could you really eat souls in that form?~

>I can do that now, actually. But I need a volunteer!

~What does love taste like?~

All of a sudden, her eyes strangely became unfocused, and she took on an almost wistful air.

>Chocolate and happy.

~...So how big is Shining Armor's dick?~

>Hm? Oh, about yea-

"NO!"

>You sure? Is it a little bigger? I wasn't paying that much attention to details, but I thought it was that bi-

"DANCE! NOW!"

>Wow, and I thought you were forceful befo-WHHEEEE~!

"The bubble is for abduction, it is not time for happy!"

>ROLL ME AROUND THE DANCEFLOOR!

'DIBS ON NEXT!'

~Can I get in on that or do I have to sleep with you first? I'm good either way.~

~I'd rather not sleep with you, but that does look like fun!~

~Take my money and put me in a bubble!~

"...Shit."
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Applejack
"Guard"
'???'
~???~
~~~

"Princess, is something wrong?"

>...Where'd Shinin' Armor go?

"I believe I saw walk out onto the balcony, why?"

>Cause half our guests 'er missin' and Ah- OH COME ON!

'...I regret absolutely nothing.'

>Really!? Here, of all places, HERE!?

'No where else to do it, really.'

>Shiny, this is the most inappropriate thing ya' could-

~WHEEEEEEE~

>DANG IT, CELESTIA! AH'M TRYIN' TA MAKE A POINT!

'Is that point that you're offended I didn't offer you first dibs on rolling in the tube?'

>NO!

'...'

>...YES!

'You were dancing.'

>That is a LOT of bits, Ah'm noticin'.

'Going to make some additions to the castle after this.'

>And Ah' also see a lot of notes. Notes promisin' sexual IOU's.

'Those are mostly Chrysalis. Mostly.'

>Is that Celestia's handwritin'?

'Yes, but that one is 'I get next ride or I'll burn your dick off with my solar-sex', not an offer for happy magic fun time.'

>...Ah' ain't offerin' ta' bang ya. No offense, yer' just not my type.

'Normal bits will do. Add them to the growing pile.'

>Ah'm a little short...

'Ahhh, well, just once you get a free ride, on me!'

>Aw, thanks sug'. Now, iffin' ya' don't mind... WHEEEEEEEE~~
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>Rarity
[Spike...sort of]
~~~~
>Spike? What's wrong? Please wake up!
Rarity notices the cup. She sniffs it and takes a sip.

>Whoa...somepony's spiked the punch. I guess he's just passed out then. Does this mean Spike's been...punched? ...*sigh*...that was a terrible joke. I better take him to a room and let him sleep it off.
As she levitates Spike and walks off, she spots Applejack dancing and having a good time.

>*gasp* Oh no. I promised Applejack a dance with Spike and I just hogged him to myself. How am I going to possibly make it up to her?
She looks at the emerald in "Spike's" mouth.
>...this might just work.
She casts a spell on the emerald and slides it into his pocket. With his eyes still closed, Spike stands upright.

>Ahem.

>[Mic check. Mic check. AEIOU. Hello World.]

>Perfect. He can move and talk...now what to do about the eyes? ...wait!
She digs through her purse and takes out a pair of adhesive googly eyes.
>Pinkie was very insistent that I take these. I guess I should learn not to doubt her.
Sticks them on to his eyelids.
>Fabulous. I said she was going dance with Spike and by Celestia she will dance with Spike.
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>Chrysalis
"Cadence"
~Various~
[???]
~~~~~

>HOOO! Wow, that is fun. Dizzy as fuck, but I-... Well now, that's an interesting sight.

The sight in question was none other that Princess Cadence herself, looking as if she was having quite the trouble standing up, and a large host of stallions standing around her.

"S-sho I said... Nooo, you can't sleep wi him! Tha's silly!"

~That is very interesting.~

~Fascinating, really.~

~We really should continue this conversation.~

~But it's just so noisy, you know?~

~Surely there must be some place better to talk.~

~If only there was a bathroom around here or something,

"...Well, there ISH a bashroom over shere..."

~That is an absolutely marvelous idea.~

~And hey, you're the Princess of Love, right?~

"DASH RIGHT!"

~You know, I haven't been feeling very loved here recently, maybe you could-~

His hoof made the most painful sounding crunching noise, but what can you expect when someone twice his size abruptly steps down on it?

>Hey, watch where the fuck you are standing!

~Y-YOU'RE THE ONE WHO-HMF~

>Indoor voice, you're at a damn party!

~Hey, don't you-~

She abruptly swung around, her massive flank cold clocking him right in the face and sending him to the ground with a black eye.

>Hey, fucko, don't get so close to my ass! What, were you trying to cop a feel or something?

~NO! We were trying to...~

He stopped cold when he noticed her eyes beginning to glow.

~Um... trying to leave, you look like you have something to discuss...~

~V-very deep discussion, I'm sure.~

~S-s-sorry for standing where you were walking I'll just... yeah...~

The large crowd beat a very hasty, or at least as hasty as possible, retreat.

>... Pft, whatever. Hey Caddy, you drunk?

"Wha!? NOOOOoooo, Ah' jush had punsh! Shee?"

>...Yep, spiked to hell, you would've been tipsy just smelling this. Damn, that's some good stuff. Buuut this is going to ruin the night for you. So...

Her horn flashed, and a green light suddenly took over Cadence's eyes. In the next moment, they were clear, but literally, and figuratively.

"W-what the... did you just make me not drunk?"

>Nah, WISH I could do that, I just mind controlled you and made your brain think you aren't drunk. You are going to be hung over like crazy tomorrow.

"You can do that? Why don't you do it when anyone else is drunk?"

>It's funnier if I don't, and I obviously can't do it to myself.

"... Thanks."

>Where the fuck were your guard, anyway?

[About five feet to your left.]

Sure enough, there two of them stood, blended into the crowd.

[However, just standing around being creepy isn't really cause for us to start breaking bones yet.]

[They have to actually make a move.]

>...Oh. Well, this all seems unnecessary now.

"Still, that was kind of nice of you. I appreciate it.

>What, breaking bones is how I get appreciation from you? Fuck, I have been going about this ALL wrong! Hey, Guard number two, need a volunteer real quick.

[Princess?]

"Don't break my Guards."

>Conflicting messages! I can't tell which way is up anymore!

"Come on, you know how to hoedown, right?"

>Not in the slightest.

"Good, I need someone to make me look less stupid by comparison."

>Hah! My little Caddy, all grown up and learning from her betters.

"Don't ruin it."

>Well, fuck. Then we better cut away-
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>SA
~Various Guests~
"???"
~~~~

~SHo den, AH KICKED 'ER ASS! HAHAHAH!~

>Ma'am, not to sound too forceful, but you are clearly drunk. Why don't we-

~EYYYY! Ish, da' Princh! HEY PRINCHY!~

>Sir, please, I'm trying to help this lady-

~Whoa shit, look at yer' coat! Ish SHO WHITE! Like mine lash weekend! HAH!~

>Miss, I really hope you are referring to painting of some kind-

~SHE AIN'T CAUSH SHESH A WHORE!~

>Pretty sure you two were supposed to be separated-

~UNF! DAT ASH!~

>Wow, grabbing it like that is so inappropriate. How does 56 get away with that? You'd think he'd be dead by now.

~HEY DJ! PLAY SHA SHONG SONG!~

>The song song?

~NO! Da Shong song!~

>That's what I said, the song song.

~NO! SHONGS! LIKE FER BUUSH!~

>I don't take the bus, what kind of music to they play?

~ARRRGH!~

>Really, I don't see what's so- OW!... 18! GET OFF THAT!

"Nom!"

>Where are you all coming from...

It was right then that he noticed a great many more tipsy looking ponies. All of them walking in wobbly lines.

Straight.

For.

Him.

>...N-nooooooo.

~Lemmy shee dash SHOOOONG! SHE! DASH SHONG!~

"Yer' butt ish nummy."

>NOOOOOOO!
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>Celestia
"Applejack"
'SA'
~???~
~~~~

>Are my subjects drunk, or is everyone just trying to molest Shining Armor?

'GET OFF THAT!'

"Little from column A, little from column B."

'For the last time, NO! There is no harem! Sir, please stop trying to strangle her-WHOA!'

>Should we... should we do something?

'TOO LOW 18! GOING TOO LOW!'

"It would prollly be the moral thing ta' do."

'SIR! Would you PLEASE stop rubbing my chest?'

>And yet, I just can't bring myself to move.

'Shoo! Why me!? Why is everyone after ME!?'

"Well, Ah' said it was moral. Ah' didn't say it would'a been the fun thing ta' do."

'EEEP! 18, I SAID... Cadence!?'

~...n-nooo...~

'...'

~...I mean, I'm shooo tipshy!~

~I made her not drunk, she's faking.~

~DAMN IT CHRYSALIS! All those points you got, gone! GONE DAMMIT!~

~Well, since I'm back to zero...~

'EEEE! STOP THAT!'

~Nom!~

'STOP CHEWING ON MY ASS!'

~Can I go back to being drunk? I want to cop another feel.~

'You're my wife! You don't have to-'

~Sure!~

*ZAP!*

~WOOO! GIMME SOMMA DAT WHITE SUGAR!~

>DAMN IT, WHY ISN'T ANYONE STOPPING THIS!? HELP! HEEEELP!

>...

"...Are ya'll recordin' this?"

>Oh yeah.
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>AJ
"Celestia"
[???]
----------

>Celestia. Ah need to ask you 'bout something

"Please Applejack, not now, I'm trying to enjoy myself here

>It's just I'm a little concerned about yer friends over there. They seem a mite drunk, and are disturbing the other guests.

"I see no problem"

[PRAISE BE TO CELESTIA!]
[MOST HOLY ILLUMINATION!]

>Ah just don't want to be dealing with an 'explosive' situation if they get outta hoof.

[A NIGHT GALA IS HERESY TO HER NAME!]

"Relax - I'm sure they'll be fine."

[CELESTIA AKBAR!]

>If this goes badly...

"Yeah, my fault - I know."
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>Celestia
"Applejack"
'SA''
~Various~
~~~~~

>Wow, they're getting to the crying part. Huh. Had no idea Pish Posh had so many problems with his daughter. Makes you really feel for the g- uh oh.

"Uh oh? Why uh oh? Uh oh ain't fun, it's scary. Stop it."

>Well, it's just... after the huggy part...

"...What!?"

>Three... two...

~BLARGH!~

>...
"..."

'I WILL NEVER BE CLEAN AGAIN!'
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>Chrysalis
“Discord”
‘Celestia’
~~~~~

There was just something unimaginably funny about watching Shining get showered with vomit from a gang of drunk ponies that caused Chrysalis to giggle like a madwoman.

>AHAHAHAHAHA! Holy shit, he’s gonna need a bath from hell to get all that out of his coat. Ahh, it’s the little things in life, I tell ya! …and what do you want?

“Why, my dear, you wound me ever so deeply with your accusing tone!”

The famed Draconequus appeared next to Chrysalis with a knife jutting from his chest, one that he easily pulled out and twirled, turning it into a cup of punch that he sipped from, smirking at her.

>I could wound you for real if that’s more your speed, Dissy. I haven’t forgotten what you did to me… the feathers… the honey… those damn bees….

“I toooold you not to mess with my darling little Fluttershy, heheheh.”

>Spare me your love for that butter-smeared psycho, ugh. Even I have my limits and you’ve amazingly managed to cross ‘em without saying anything! Congratulations!

“I could replace my punch with essence of queen bitch, you know.”

>Sounds kinky. Why don’t you, then?

“Because that would just lead to getting zapped with the EoH beam of death, and I’ve got a streak of three days going! But my dear… that’s not why I’ve come to you….”

>Coming already? I haven’t even done anything yet!

“…Cute.”

Tilting his cup, Discord poured the contents out into the palm and Chrysalis watched with some intrigue as the liquid swirled to form a pair of slitted eyes, gazing right up at her.

>I won’t be impressed until you do the bouquet trick. That always gets my knees weak.

“There’s another here, and they’re watching you.”

It was almost sang out and Discord snapped his fingers, which made the eyes explode into a plume of scarlet mist that gathered to form a hand with its middle finger up.

>…Cute.

“It’s a warning. There’s nothing I love more than chaos, oh it just gives me the tingles, so that’s why I feel the need to… even the playing field a little.”

>Are you insulting me, Dissy? I feel like you’re insulting me.

“Oooooh, so the bitch queen has felt it then?”

>Queen bitch, thank you! And as the queen, do you think I can’t tell when one of my own isn’t nearby? There are approximately ten of my little onions here-

“Minions.”

>Shit! I’ll get that right one of these days! Anyway, there are ten here, and I only recognize nine of them. That tenth one is a blur… it’s definitely mine, but I haven’t felt them for a long time.

“Aha! So the Queen of Changelings actually has some talent after all!”

>About as much talent as the Draconequus maid next to me.

“…That was ONE time.”

>And you’ve been whipped ever since. But you were saying? How do you know about this stray of mine?

“Because all things chaotic ring bells with me, and this lost bug of yours is oozing it in droves.”

>Hm. Your kind of chaos is more annoying than funny, so that leads me to believe this stray is up to no good. He hasn’t even come to kiss my hooves yet! The nerve!

“Yes, yes! Get riled up, flutter those nasty wings, shake that rank rump, get incensed and go get that miscreant under control!”

>I shall! And remind me to kick your ass for those insults later!

~~~~~~

‘Um… where’s Chrysalis off to in such a hurry? And why the hell are you smiling so hard? There’s nothing funny or even remotely chaotic happening.’

“All good things come with time, my dear. They come with time….”

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Sombra
"32/Lord Tourmaline"
'Morlock'
-Robot-

-Parameter Input Complete!-

>It is done then?

"Yes, the robot will follow my instructions. Amazing that its makers left it so...malleable."

>They were geniuses, but barely so.

There was a creak as the door to the library chamber was pushed open, 32's Morlocks stepped into the room, carrying sacks of the supplies they had been asked to procure. Sombra could make out shovels and hoes poking out of one bag.

'Chieftain, we have succeede-'

The Morlocks noticed Sombra's presence and hissed, baring their fangs at the wisp. 32 positioned himself between them.

"No, he is not an enemy. Morlocks, I am afraid that for the foreseeable future we must part ways."

The Morlocks regarded their leader with surprise in their milky white eyes.

'What?'

"There are things I must accomplish here before I can return...if I can return to our home. I must entrust you with something of the utmost importance."

32 gathered the books into another bag and nudged the robot inside. He pushed it in front of the Morlock who had spoken.

"What is contained in this bag represents your future, a future far removed from the vile creatures that attacked me in the tunnels, from the primitive monstrosities I took command over by defeating their leader. It is a future in which your children's children will no longer live in fear of being cannibalized in lean years, a future where there will be peace beneath the ground, a safety unseen for millennia untold."

32 nodded to them.

"I give you the keys to a better future, my subjects, my students, my friends, but it is you who must unlock the door. I will help when I return from this place...if I return from this place. Do not make the mistakes my race did, an existence of primitive ferocity will not avail you, only lead you to a slow agonizing death. Go now, be swift, be silent, let no one come to harm."

'It shall be done, chieftain.'

The Morlocks moved to leave.

"Please..."

They looked back to see a smile on the face of the creature they had known as their overlord and oppressor, but also their teacher and guide.

"Call me Zhetri Tuuhl."

The Morlocks nodded and resumed their flight.

-OIL LEAKAGE DETECTED IN VIEW PORTS!-

"VOLUME!"

32 shook his head and returned his gaze to Sombra.

"Well, time to face the music...the crass, provincial, violin and jug based music."

>Do you truly believe they will take your words to heart.

"I have hope, that's gotten me that far."
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>SA
"Celestia"
~~~

>I WILL NEVER BE CLEAN AGAIN!

"Speaking of, did you have to teleport to MY bath, specifically? That thing is really, really expensive, and we are LONG since past the time when I could get away with extravagance like this and not have an annoying nag breathing down my neck."

>It was the only place I could remember in a panicked state, now SCRUB!

"I'm scrubbing! By the way, what do you want me to do with the clothing-... okay, that is a fire hazard."

>NEVER CLEAN!

"Ugh, you are so lucky I still have your spare suit from when you worked here."

>...Really?

"Hm? Oh, yeah. Stashed it away in my little special closet. It was the one you changed out of when I presented you with your captain of the guard attire."

>Oh wow, I thought I threw that away.

"You did. I like to save little things like that. Little pieces to remember when you were just that one guard who made funny faces to cheer me up on the summer sun celebration."

>I still can't believe that worked. My old commander had a heart attack.

"To this day, I have no idea how you slipped past my radar."

>Hm? How so?

"It's strange, I'm normally so adept at seeing when ponies are going to reach greatness, when they're going to stand out and be something special, but you... I used to believe you were just a bit plain."

>Ouch.

"Oh, don't be like that. Shield magic aside, you were never really remarkable as a spellcaster, and it's not like Shield spells were unusual for a guard, or all that impressive for offensive use. You could have been any pony on the street, and I knew nothing about you. But I swear it was as if one day you just suddenly materialized. I turned around and suddenly there was this stallion, saying to all the world, 'Look at me! I'm Shining Armor, and I'm super important!' and then you were."

>And I decided to voice this by sticking my tongue out and crossing my eyes.

"It was shocking, to say the least."

>Why? Did you honestly think we didn't want you to be happy or something?

"No... it's that, none of the other guards even realized I was feeling upset at all. I thought I had hidden it so well, but then... it made me feel so happy that someone could see through it, and say 'damn the consequences, she needs to smile.' I don't get nearly enough of that anymore."

>...Yeah, well, I pick up on stuff like that. Guess that's why Chrysalis had to mind-zap me so much, eh?

"I figured it was just so you would stop annoying her."

>Oh, you're one to talk, lickylicky!

"I did that ONCE!"

>And I will NEVER let it go! Proud moment for me, I have to admit. I still think it's why you won't go near ice sculptures anymore.

"Even my best friends are humiliating me!"

>Oh, speaking of-

Celestia's body suddenly flashed, and her dress disappeared.

"Oh my, so sudden Lacey Mcgee! Why, we barely know each other- HEY!"

With a splash, she went under the water.

>THAT'S FOR NOT HELPING ME AND FILMING IT!

She came up with a gasp, mane wet and eyes flaming.

"So it's like that, huh? Well, I have no regrets! NEH!"

Almost child-like, she swung a hoof full of water in his face.

>I will give you regrets! NEH!

The returning splash was just a BIT more childish.

"NEVER REGRETTER! NEH!"

>I WILL BEAT YOUR GIGANTIC WHITE ASS! NEEEH!

"NEEEEEH!"

>NEEEEEEEEH!

"NEEEEEEEEEEEEH~

>"NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-

The door to the bathroom opened, stayed that way for a second, and then closed. Mentally, Applejack crossed off "check on Shining Armor and Celestia" off her minds list, and walked away, pointedly ignoring the sounds she left behind.

>"NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE~"
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>SA
"42"
~~~~~

>Okay, this is a little loose. Damn, was I really that chunky back then? I feel ashamed, maybe I should-

While he would later concede that yes, it was silly to imagine a train had somehow slipped into the castle and struck him like a ninja, but for the next few micro seconds as he flew through the air, nothing could convince him otherwise.

>...Ow.

"O-oh my! Ah'm SHO Shorry!"

>...42, you're drunk.

Wobbly though she was, the Changelings eyes still managed to furrow indignantly.

"Sha'sh not what yer' s'posed ta' say! Yer' s'poshed ta' be all blushy! Hold shtill, gotta try it again."

>Try wha-

So, to recap. Wall, hard. Desk, hard. Bed, not as hard. And finally, wall, hard.

>...

"Whoopsh! AH' jush' can believe how clumshy Ah' am!"

>The saddest part is that Chrysalis already tried this.

"Dang it!"

>42, really-

Oh look, those arguing ponies made u- no, wait, that wasn't her husband. Hard to tell with the blurry scenery passing by.

>Owwww....

"Dash better!... WAIT! SHIT! Ah' screwed it up! Lemme try again!"

>Please no-

My, it was lovely out tonight. And weren't the clouds just the fluffiest? Not fluffy enough to stop his rise to glory, obviously, but the solid dirt of the garden was on the case!

>...Owww, I taste hurt.

"DASH WHAT YER' S'POSED TA SAY! YAAAAAAAY!"

>...42?

"Uh huh?"

>Do me a favor. Go find Chrysalis, tell her Shiny said if she makes you not drunk he'll give her a hug, and then you come right back to me, okay?

"...You promish you'll still be here?"

>Promise. My badly damaged spine promises too, but you can't hear it. Only I can. It's screaming.

"M'KAY!"

And she just walks off, humming the theme to whatever garbage sparked this madness.

At least, if nothing else, he was going to inspect the FUCK out of that dirt in front of his face. No crumbs was leaving his sight, no siree!

>...My everything hurts.
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Applejack
-Spike/Indigo- (under Rara's control)
'???'
~~~~~
-Hello, darl- Princess Applejack, May I have this dance?-

>Oh! hey there, loverboy! Think ya know how to... What's wit' tha glasses?

-Oh, these? Rarity gave them to me! To... Bring out my eyes, quite a stylish choice, no?-

>Hehehe... Darlin', Rarity's prankin' ya, those look like somethin' Pinkie Pie wears- Actually she is.

Applejack points to Pinkie Pie and Cheese, both of them wearing the silly glasses

-... They also let me see through the fog.-

>Now, Spike, ya don' gotta make excuses. So, how 'bout that dance? Ever done a hoedown before?

-Yes! I mean I did it at Twilight's birthday party.-

>... Ya'll weren' there though? Ah mean it was a bit o' a dick move-

-I meant the birthday before that! Ahahaha! How silly of me!-

>Righ'... anyway though, let's-...

'Good evening, Applejack, may I have this... Dance?'

>Spike?

'Ahahaha! Oh! This must be one of Chrysalis' pranks! Give me a moment and let me talk to this guy!'

Spike drags off Indigo

'What are you doing? I told you that I would take care of Applehjack myself-'

Smack!

-Spikey. Wikey... Darling, you have some very serious explaining to do...-

'Uh oh...'

-Care to start? the truth will set you free you know?-

'... NOPE!'

Spike cheeses it

-GET BACK HERE!-
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Twilight
"Spike/Yellow"
'Spike/Green'
[DT]
~~~~~
>Spike, are you alright? You've been acting strangely all night.

"I'M PERFECTLY FINE. MAYBE. You know what! I am a little tipsy! boy, I have had my share of the punch and you've seen what it's been doing to-"

>Spike... You can't get drunk. Your metabolism burns the alcohol too quickly and your livers make short work of toxins...

"OH. I DID NOT REALIZE THA-"

>You were the subject of the experiments.

DT's voice can be heard approaching with a frantic Spike voice in tow

[C'mon, maybe your egghead mentor can explain why you need some anti-armor]

'NO! I SEE THE LIGHT! I'LL USE ONLY GRENADE LAUNCHERS FROM NOW ON! WE DON'T HAVE TO go there...'

the two groups see eachother

>...

[...]

'Um, ladies! I know this looks bad but-'

>"Spike", care to ex- oh for the love of...

Yellow's caught, obviously mid-way through transforming into Celestia and freezes, now looking like some kind of Celestia-Spike-Taur

'... This looks even worse... I'm sorry.'

"Ehehe... Oops?"

'Dammit, Yellow...'
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Applejack
“AJ56”
______

The interior of Canterlot castle at night was shockingly quiet, and given the rambunctious ‘family’ gathered there, the silence was made all the more unnerving.

But in one vast section of the castle, namely the kitchen, there was light, stemming from a single bulb. Underneath its warm light stood Applejack, the expression over her face vacant, almost contemplative, as she manually worked a wooden spoon in circles through a mixing bowl of ingredients.

She’d been stirring clockwise for the past three hours. Occasionally, every half hour so, she’d switch it to counter-clockwise then right back to clockwise. With every counter stir, a new thought would ram itself painfully into her head to join the others where it’d sit there and stagnate without relief. She was trapped in a soul-corroding downward spiral, hence the robotic mixing, and it didn’t seem as though any sort of soothing reassurance was coming anytime s-

There was a sudden shuffling from behind her and a new shadow played over the tiled floor, a shadow rubbing its eye.

“Orangebutt…? What’re ya doin’ in here?”

>Go back t’bed, sugarcube. Ah’m makin’ chocolate puddin’.

“I… what? It’s four in the mornin’, why’re you making chocolate pudding?”

>‘Cause Ah’ve lost control of mah life.

“Oh. Okay. Do ya know where you last left it?”

The innocence of his question was charmingly endearing and Applejack would have laughed were she not so depressed.

>Wish Ah did, darlin’. Wish Ah did….

She felt him hug her from behind, and looked to see him staring blearily up at her with his chin resting on her hip. Little fella was drop dead tired.

>Y’all should be sleepin’, 56.

“I can’t….”

>Why not?

“Because you’re not there.”

>…why should that matter?”

“B-buh-*yaaaaawn*-because I can’t control my own life unless you and the others are there….”

The stirring stopped.

56’s words in no way caused any of the predicaments Applejack was mentally facing to fix themselves, but… suddenly… things didn’t seem as suffocating. And that confused her. So much so that she laughed, genuinely, and ruffled the tired Changeling’s mane.

>Yer’ somethin’ else, 56, Ah swear.

“No I’m not. I’m 56, a very tired 56.”

>…pft. Well, c’mon, let’s get t’bed then.

And Applejack set the mixing bowl on the counter, not even bothering to clean it or put back the multitude of ingredients she’d pulled from the shelves. The cooks would handle that in the morning.

“Hey, when we get to bed can you lie on your side, or your stomach?”

>Why?

“It’s hard to snuggle your plot when you're on your back and I’m too sleepy to work for it.”

>…

NON CANON
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