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- The 10 DJommandments.
- 1. DJ is your Lord. You shall worship him or he will beat you down.
- 2. You cannot make graven images of DJ for He is too awesome and you cannot capture Him.
- 3. You can take the name of DJ in vain, that is great! He encourages it!
- 4. You will rest whenever the hell you want for it pleases DJ.
- 5. Honor no one. Except DJ. Fuck the rest of the world.
- 6. Go drinking, and if you murder someone, well, they probabaly deserved it. DJ doesn't judge either way.
- 7. Commit adultery. Video tape it. Send a copy to DJ.
- 8. Steal. Sell it. Send half the proceeds to DJ.
- 9. Bear false witness. Especially if it protects you from the last two things.
- 10. Covet every last thing your neighbor has. Nail their partner, take their car, take their house, take all their shit.
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