ITT: Flamy is in trouble

[7:58 PM] Flamy: i can't see message history
[7:58 PM] Flamy: what did i do now
[8:00 PM] dekw;: Nothing related in the history here, but that's by design. Anyways, to lay it out relatively directly...
[8:01 PM] dekw;: You need to chill pretty significantly with the passive-aggressive instigation. It's failed to have been brought up recently because none of the active mods have been around while it occurred, and it's more awkward to dredge stuff up to take someone aside to talk about then to sort it out if it's stopped while it's happening.
[8:02 PM] dekw;: Well, none of the active mods except DF, but she's been the target of most of it for the last while, and there's a whole different host of doubtful anxieties about standing up for oneself while in the mod seat.
[8:05 PM] dekw;: The constant passive-aggressive arguing is anywhere from difficult to completely out of line, the general attitude makes it obvious and awkward (but you can be sure it's quite noticeable, I'm afraid), and the general condescending tone of all these interactions, as well as the fact that they seem pretty much targeted... are really not okay, and really not within the whole, general global respect rule things go by here.
[8:06 PM] dekw;: You have, in the past, been under heat for starting arguments in more contentious situations on the server, and continuing arguments unnecessarily and in the face of the rules, as well. So, as this has been going on for a while, I wanted to just get the awkwardness over with and just make it as clear as possible:
[8:10 PM] dekw;: That kind of behaviour is not okay, and this is the only warning I'm going to give you about it. If this kind of thing happens again, you will not be welcome on the server. This is the kind of thing that lead to the last bans this server had to see, and keeping it more vague or limited in who you aim it at doesn't make it any more acceptable.
[8:10 PM] dekw;: If you have any issues you feel are legitimate, you are free to discuss and bring it up privately with any of the other mods, or hell, you can ask Haru as well if you want an non server central angle. If you want to bring stuff like this up with me outside of any server rule or moderation context, I don't act as a PG mod anywhere else, be they PMs or other servers.
[8:11 PM] dekw;: That's about it. Is that all clear?
[8:23 PM] dekw;: (and if there's any objections or clarifications you need, here is of course also the time and place)
[8:24 PM] Flamy: I'm pretty sure this came entirely from the argument earlier today. I was pretty damn clear about opposing DragonFlare, and I was pretty damn clear that Alkaid was approaching the whole rare item hunting he was moping about with the wrong idea. Moreover, DragonFlare tried to make me out as the bad guy, when I had a point and wasn't being rude about it none. She's unfit to be on the mod seat in the first place, because she lets her own opinions taint what's actually going on.
[8:25 PM] dekw;: Ah.
[8:25 PM] dekw;: No.
[8:25 PM] dekw;: The argument earlier today isn't it.
[8:25 PM] dekw;: That one was a lot more on all sides.
[8:25 PM] dekw;: It served as a reminder to sort this out sooner than later, not too much more.
[8:27 PM] dekw;: The unfit to be on the mod seat part? Sure, opinions on mods are allowed, I'm not gonna tell you who you should or shouldn't think is a good mod. But a lot of prior cases have pretty much just been rampant passive-aggression where none is required, from somebody with a somewhat fraught record.
[8:27 PM] dekw;: You don't have to like people. Your restraint about people you dislike, as it stands, consistently fails to meet the standards of the server.
[8:30 PM] dekw;: Now, I'm not sure if that's an issue of awareness of how you're coming off, or of restraint that may be a struggle to keep.
[8:30 PM] dekw;: But it is on no uncertain terms a problem.
[8:52 PM] Flamy: Tell you what: I'll leave. It's clear that I'm not a very good match for the rules or for the people here- Looking back in #round-table's message history, for example, people haven't exactly liked me in the past, and I'm quite sure that I'm not very well-appreciated now, both by people from and people outside of this community. It's not like I'm even the target audience for the server- After all, it's only for those who HaruFE and are from SFMafia/EiMMpire, so that counts me out pretty well.
[8:55 PM] dekw;: That is entirely your choice to make. I'd recommend you think about it carefully, however, because the invite back is out of your hands.
[8:56 PM] Flamy: I'm well-aware
[8:57 PM] dekw;: I don't -- have never and will never -- speak for the actual like/dislike of the community, nor do I really pay much attention to it. I don't particularly have any other opinions about you over this beyond the unfortunately awkward state of building friction with the rules.
[8:57 PM] dekw;: So I can't really say much on people liking, disliking, or having any other opinion about you.
[8:58 PM] dekw;: This is just formalization of an unfortunate situation buildup. If you want the base what's-it-about/suspect it's still to do with recent events, it's more of something that should have been addressed... since you came dangerously close to being collateral when we had to remove Tony and then Valflame from the server.
[8:59 PM] dekw;: Entirely on the back of how you argued with them, and nothing else in their general sphere of collisions with the server rules.
[8:59 PM] Flamy: Oh yeah, I'm aware, that's where I got the whole "people don't really like Flamy" thing from
[9:00 PM] dekw;: I can't recall too much. Iirc my general take was that you meant well and had really poor restraint, which... well, is why we're here, unfortunately.
[9:00 PM] Flamy: Mm-hm, read that part, too
[9:01 PM] dekw;: I didn't look too much at the rest. I don't have a social instinct in my brain so I just have to go by what's actually happening at the time/logs rather than just how mad people are.
[9:02 PM] dekw;: In either case, leaving or not leaving is absolutely your call to make. If you don't want to leave, well, soon as this conversation's over with I was just gonna drop off the role and leave you to your business since...
[9:03 PM] dekw;: Well, it's a warning, and that's been given. I don't particularly need you to feel bad or hate yourself, the escalation is just a thing that kinda needs to not happen.
[9:05 PM] Flamy: Guess we'll be calling it here, then- Mod team wins the bid, I'll make sure to send them my regards.
[9:06 PM] Flamy: See y'all
[9:06 PM] dekw;: Really, if you need a cause, you can pin it on me.
[9:06 PM] dekw;: See you around, and best of luck, then.
[9:06 PM] Flamy: You?
[9:06 PM] Flamy: What for?
[9:07 PM] Flamy: As I see it, you're only doing it, because it's in the best interests of a community to target and remove the worst dissenters- That just happens to be me.
[9:07 PM] dekw;: It's boring and somewhat draconian rules enforcement, yes
[9:08 PM] Flamy: I'm sure you'll go further down the list in the future, as soon as Max or Nymph or hell, *Naruga* actually start bothering people the mod team are concerned about
[9:09 PM] dekw;: Pretty good list, far as the work and people who can instigate go. Max got flat called by Haru last time, so we'll see about that.
[9:10 PM] dekw;: But if "don't keep escalating these fights" immediately comes down to being considered a hard ban...?
[9:10 PM] dekw;: That's pretty telling, I'm afraid.
[9:10 PM] Flamy: Eh, just someone aware of how it goes, having been in the position before