Musings/Ramblings/Whinings

So my second job has been giving me fewer hours lately. This isn't a complaint--it started when I told them basically "If you're having trouble balancing the schedule, I don't mind working fewer hours to help out" (Basically, the store is alloted a total number of workers' hours each week to divvy up among the employees, that the store isn't supposed to go over. Also, as the only part-time employee at the store, as it's my second job, I'm the one in the best financial position to make such a "sacrifice", if one can call it that)--but it has left me with a bit more free time of late.

As a result, I've been considering taking some of that free time and making a second push for Twitch partnership. The thing about that is this:

Right now, I'm, to be blunt, not big enough on Twitch to actually get partnered. This was true even when I was actively speedrunning, and it's even more true now that I'm out of that particular game and into casually playing RPGs. That's not insurmountable, in itself, but it does bring up another issue.

The only way to "get big" is to get noticed and helped by someone bigger than you. Except you can't actually ask someone bigger than you to notice you and help you out, because then you just look like you're begging. So essentially, getting big enough to be able to apply for Twitch partnership and have a reasonable shot of actually getting accepted boils down to "Get lucky.", especially now that Twitch seems to be past their 2014 method of "Throw darts at a chessboard while blindfolded" of deciding who actually gets partnered.

And of course, I've only made it harder on myself by not speedrunning anymore. While I do still hang out in a number of speedrunning streams, I'm certainly not "active" in it anymore. I feel like I'd basically be "on my own" in this push, if I were to go for it, which is the kiss of death for it. Like I said in a slightly cynical way above, I can't do it on my own.

I do have a couple ideas for sub emotes if I were to actually get it. mtiColonX on FrankerFaceZ would've been a sub emote (I would change it a bit if I were to get sub now, and just leave the first version as an FFZ version), and I also have http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v448/Emptyeye/mtiMTC_zpsk1ej9sqp.png as an idea for a second one. So there's that.

I guess the point of this stream of consciousness is to ask:

Should I go for it, having already failed once?

And would anyone be willing to aid the push if I did try?