TRANSCENDENCE 12

There's a distinct change in Savannah.

The fire in her eyes has died down. She stares at the crowds with a dead stare. Months before, she'd watch the passerbys with a hawk's gaze, watching for abnormalities or interests.

"Peoplewatching," she'd explain, "to see if there is anyone like me."

But now, it's because there's no where else to look. Staring at the sky was work - it'd strain her neck, and so would looking at the ground.

There are bags beneath her eyes. The only vibrancy they hold is their color, and otherwise, they're empty and lifeless. She's slumped against the post bordering Athena's statue, and at her sides, her fists clench and unclench periodically.

She couldn't sleep. She couldn't think. Not until she made a breakthrough - not until she could figure it out.
(Savannah)
Savannah, as it would seem, wasn't the only one who, as of late had had troubled sleep. Rhea, despite her regular chipper attitude, appeared rather sluggish, moving with her shoulders slumped and her eyes somewhat hazy and burdened with bags. Regardless, she wore her usual smile. Somewhat welcoming, only mildly less so with her current demeanor.

She came away from the marketplace with a few bags hung over her arms, body straining slightly with the weight giving hint that there was probably no insignifcant weight upon her. However, something caught her attention - a head of green hair and a vaguely familiar face that caused the girl to squint and adjust her glasses before slowly approaching.

"Hey, uh... Sorry, but. You look familiar? Do I know you from somewhere maybe?" She asked, letting her groceries slide down towards the ground for the time being.
(Rhea Rosengard)
Savannah's dead stare turned to Rhea. Her idle attitude had grown sluggish and lazy, despondent, perhaps, but during interactions, she did her best to appear as 'normal' as she could.

However, there was no flicker of recognition in her eyes. Years of antagonizing and bothering the poor citizens of Valmasia had passed, and while she was memorable due to her bright green hair, her victims were not.

She shook her head.

"Nope, but I get that a lot. I'm memorable," she said, flashing a cheeky grin, "for several reasons."

She paused, furrowing her brow to make a final attempt to remember the Rosengard. Once more, Savannah shook her head.

"Nothin'. I probably tried to shit on your day once - maybe I laid in the middle of the road, or you came up and bothered me so I made it my goal to be as pissy as possible. Those're the general explanations. Sound familiar?"
(Savannah)
Rhea strained her eyes and mind further, rubbing at the back of her head in an attempt to stir up her memory and bring them forth, finally, it hit her. "Oh... Oh! Right. I remember now. You, uh. You. Kinda? Had a part in me? Almost getting stabbed? Just, uh. A little bit! No issue, or anything! Hahaha." She laughed nervously, taking a half step back.

"And then that other lady came out. Ms... Beatrice, I think? I don't remember if I caught your name, it was, uh. A very. Stressful. Situation? A lot of distractions... That would. Explain why I'm, uh. Having a hard time remembering you. I don't blame you for forgetting me, or anything. I'm, uh. Pretty forgettable! So no worries or anything." She said, crossing one leg behind the other as she extended a hand out.

"I'm Rhea. Rhea Rosengard! It's a pleasure to actually meet you. When. I'm. Not at the threat of being stabbed."
(Rhea Rosengard)
Savannah's face flushed a stark red. The sudden reminder of that embarrassing day wasn't something she needed, and at once, a renewed hatred for Beatrice boiled inside of her.

She had long wiped that scene from her mind, but now it was laid out before her in full view.

"Oh."

She took a moment to collect herself, swallowing nervously - this woman had seen her at her most vulnerable. That wasn't something she was comfortable with, not in the slightest! She needed to be strong, she needed to appear confident and sure in herself to the public...

"Yeah," she said, tilting her head downwards for a moment, at least, until the heat in her face seemed to disperse. "Sorry about that, Bl - ... Carmelia is a bit new to 'being social', I guess."

When she tilted her head up again, she caught the offer of Rhea's handshake. She shoots it a nervous glare, and then looks down at her own hand - it's covered in dirt and grime, and it has certainly never shaken with the hand of someone else.

Nervous thoughts danced through her head: if she refused this woman's polite gesture, she could surely blackmail her. She could threaten her, use the knowledge of her embarrassing moments against her! Savannah's brows furrowed. Certainly, this handshake was a huge conundrum!

Shakily, her own hand moves forward and grasps Rhea's own. It's an awkward movement, and all at once, it's evident that Savannah's never done it before - or even less been polite.

But there's a first for everything.

"Savannah."
(Savannah)
Rhea maintained her patience throughout the hesitation and such. She laughed a bit at Savannah's words, shrugging just a little. "That makes sense! Not everyone's great with everything. Don't worry about it, haha. These things, uh. Happen? I've. Never. Seen it happen! Apart from, uh. Then. But I'm sure they do!"

"Savannah? That's a nice name." She said. Her handshake wasn't the most firm - a little soft actually, but she seemed genuine enough. If Savannah looked a bit closely, she might notice a bit of a concerned spark in the Rosengard's eyes as she leaned in jsut a bit before taking a step back.

"Hey, if. You. Don't mind me saying. Sorry if I'm crossing borders! I know I just met you and all, haha. But. Uh. I'm just a bit worried? You look tired? Maybe just a bit? Sorry, that's probably a bit rude. I just want to make sure you're taking care of yourself, haha..."

"Is everything okay?"
(Rhea Rosengard)
Although Savannah's unexperienced handshake lingered just a bit too long, as soon as she caught Rhea's worried expression, she drew her hand back in like it stung. It rose to rub at her cheeks, as if it would bring life back to her sallow skin.

"No - I mean, I'm fine." Her words were uncertain, and surely enough, tired sounding. Her hand fell down to her side, and her gaze followed. Her foot tapped impatiently on the ground - she was eager to get away from this dangerous girl, the one who could sense all her problems!

"Just a bit tired, I mean... it's nothing that can't be fixed!"

Savannah couldn't muster the energy to be mean, to drive away this threat to her secure emotions! She yearned for sleep, the only fix to this problem, but she couldn't wait. She was running out of time.

"I'll fix it soon! I mean, I'll sleep soon..." She flashed Rhea a nervous smile!
(Savannah)
"Oh, haha. That's good. I'm sorry to pry." She said, smiling gently and pulling away. "Through, uh. If having somewhere to rest is an issue? I can probably find you somewhere in the court? I mean, I doubt it would be permenant, and I'd have to talk to my cousin, but-- ah..."

"You probably don't need strange people in the streets offering you anything. That's just, uh. Creepy and weird, sorry." She said, blinking slowly and glancing to the floor. "But, uh. Even though we just met! If you need anything, don't hestitate to ask! I'll help as best I can, alright?"

"You can usually find me around here. Ish. I'm in Danarium most the time, at least!"
(Rhea Rosengard)
A deep breath...

...and Savannah blurted.

"I haven't slept for a week and the last time I slept was only  because I passed out in the middle of town and I don't have time I need to move fast I have to figure out everything because my life is so short and I'm going to die before I know it all - "

She took in a deep breath. Her face was growing red.

"There's something more that I can't figure out there's more to it and I can't - I can't do it I can't see it and I'm going to freak out because there's something missing it feels like a chunk of me is gone and it's so uncomfortable and I need to figure it out I can't..."

Savannah took in another shaky breath and screwed her eyes shut. When she opened them, big fat crocodile tears rolled out. Whatever the hell she was babbling about was serious business to her!

She blubbered out a final end note, and then ducked her head sheepishly. How shameful - crying in public!

"I can't do it..."
(Savannah)
Rhea was visably taken aback. Her mouth hung agape for a few fleeting moments, and her eyes went wide, but as Savannah went on and on, Rhea put on something more of a sorrowful smile, something almost forced, and gave a soft laugh as she reached for Savannah's hand with her own.

"You have time, friend. If you're in so much of a rush to live your life, it'll just fly by you. Sometimes, you just need to close your eyes, take a breath, and let time go by and follow with it instead of trying to rush ahead." She said, pausing just a moment.

"I get what you mean, trust me, I really do. It's scary. It's awful, but try not to worry too much. Sometimes all you need is some good friends, and some good laughs. Alright?" She said. She reached into her bag, patting around until she found a small cloth, offering it to Savannah with her other friend.

"Can you give me a smile?"
(Rhea Rosengard)
Savannah shook her head.

"No, no, you don't understand, you..."

Her hand rose up to grasp Rhea's shoulder. Her grip was firm and her stare was intense, serious.

"You're nothing. You're a blip in the timeline, a single, miniscule, invisible fraction of the Infinity. Our lives are but a second in the face of it all - we're nothing, and how do we understand everything if we're so small? I have to move fast, I have to get there, and I don't have time to sleep. I can't sleep - there's not time!"
(Savannah)
Rhea's face was uncharacteristically serious for just a moment. A bit of a frown painted upon her features as she starred Savannah down. "No, I get it. More than you probably know, I understand how fast time can sweep things away. You do not need to explain any of it to me."

"Spend to much time thinking about it though, and nothing good will happen. It'll consume you. I don't want to see that happen. You need to relax and stop worrying, or else you're going to hurt yourself somehow. You're already hurting yourself."

"And you need to stop/"
(Rhea Rosengard)
Savannah took in a deep breath. She drew away her hand and folded it aganist her chest, balling it up into a fist. She stared down at it, falling silent in serious thought. Her brows furrowed and her expression twisted in a grimace.

"I need to understand it all - I need the full picture."

That was the end of her explanation. Her pitiful plight was revealed before Rhea in its entirety. She was desperate - frantic, even, in understanding what she could...

And with that, she dipped her head, as if to hide her face.
(Savannah)
"I find that sometimes you have to paint the picture yourself." Rhea said, laughing softly. "Don't think to hard on everything, Savannah. It could come back to bite you." She said, retracting her hand and brushing her hair back.

"Or, maybe it is important to think? I don't know. Haha... But. Don't try to tackle life alone, y'know? There's a reason Kraus didn't just put one person on Valmasia, or a bunch of people who think the same way. We're meant to work together to make life as great as it can be." She explained, her smile becoming genuine again.

"Don't forget that, friend."
(Rhea Rosengard)
The stark, red glow flushed across Savannah's face again.

Friend?

The word struck home and made Savannah remember what situation she was in. A stark, offended stare is shot towards Rhea. Her nose wrinkles and her fingers furl together into fists.

"We're not friends," she retorts, a sudden sour tone overtaking her voice. Whatever energy she lacked moments ago had now returned in a final, last ditch effort to drive the threat away, "Who said we were friends?"

"I don't need someone telling me what to do or how to pursue my interests." Her voice was shaky.
(Savannah)
The words struck like a sharp knife.

As the words tore into her ears, Rhea felt physically assaulted. Her breath felt short and she had to swallow, hard. "O-oh. I- I, um. Er..." She stumbled over words, trying to speak but without any ability to do so. She was just a stammering mess, shaking somewhat.

"I- I.. I just th-thought, that.... I mean. With..." She shuddered, glancing away. "S-sorry, I- I'm really bugging y-you, aren't I...? Oh gosh, I... I really messed up, oh no... I'm sorry! I'm really sorry. I didn't... I didn't mean to..." It almost looked like Rhea was ready to cry now. She swiftly glanced away.

"I'll -- I.. You. Probably. Don't. Need me... To keep. Bugging you. Haha... I'm sorry I'm so dumb..." She said, her hands tucked in her pockets as she began to walk away.
(Rhea Rosengard)
Savannah stared as Rhea walked away. She forced herself to be satisfied, swallowing the regret that came with it. She swallowed hard, struggling to pacify that voice in her head, the one that always foiled her plans...

But she couldn't. You feel bad. You shouldn't have done that. How do you think she feels? This is why no one will ever talk to you. This is why you're a freak --

"Stop! I - I didn't mean that," and she choked out the two final words, something one has never heard from Savannah before, "I'm sorry."
(Savannah)
Rhea looked positively blue about the whole situation. By the way her hands stuffed her pockets with her shoulders pushed up, and by the way her gaze didn't leave the floor; she almost was entirely unresponsive to Svannah's words, but she did stop, turning around.

"No, no. I get it." She said, laughing nervously. "I'm just dumb and annoying, you don't need to pretend to like me to not make me feel bad, or anything. If you don't want to talk to me, I'll just... Go. I mess up a lot. I don't blame you if you hate me, haha..." She said - it seemed rather genuine, rather than a pity ploy.

"Sorry for bugging you..."
(Rhea Rosengard)
Savannah was completely and utterly incapable of keeping her defenses up any higher. That voice in her head - her conscience - nagged and bugged her until she crumbled. She was too tired to care about her ego, her reputation, or whether or not she was in public.

Hell, she was already crying again.

"I was trying to get you to go away so you wouldn't see me like this." What was this? "Weak, and desperate, and tired. I'm mean so people will leave me alone. Because I'm scared."

"Because I don't wanna get hurt. But..." That voice was defeaning. She winced, as if in pain. "I just hurt you instead."
(Savannah)
Rhea paused. "A-ah..." She said, running her fingers through her hair with a shuddering breath. She swallowed hard before glancing down towards the ground once more. "Ha...Haha. I, I do. Understand you, Savannah. I think. You and me think rather alike. Haha..." She said, glancing aside.

"I-it's okay, though. I'm okay with. Being. Hurt. As long as you can find it in yourself to, uh. To. be okay? Then. I'll be fine. Don't worry about me. You should, uh. Worry about. Trying to find somewhere to sleep instead, haha..." She said.

"B-but if you need to hear it, or anything... I forgive you."
(Rhea Rosengard)
Savannah's expression twisted in something unreadable - she was tired and emotional and far too unstable for comprehension.

"Sorry," she repeated, "sorry..."

She shook her head, as if in disbelief at herself. In the raw eye of her uncompressed consceince, she was pathetic - so paranoid that she'd drive everyone away out of fear. But she wouldn't go low enough to admit it.

"I'll just. Leave you alone... Find somewhere to sleep."

She backed away for a moment before turning on her heel, darting away without looking back.
(Savannah)