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Jul 31st, 2020
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  1. "Hello, I'm Morgan Freeman and welcome to Lost Tales with the Talisman. Today we are looking at a story by an author who had a rather unconventional style of adding detail. Let's begin." Once upon a time Randy Dandy and Obama Llama were having passionate anal sex on a cloudy day. Not the kind of cloudy where you can't see your shadow, more like the kind of cloudy where your shoes are invisible. At the same time, it's not like the shoes are actually invisible, there is just so much darkness that everything looks black. But not black in the racist way, black as in the way that your aunt from the deep American South talks about the black eye she endured while playing football last saturday. By deep American South, I mean the very most southern states. Like Georgia or Alabama. But not Georgia as in the country, Georgia as in the American State. When I say American State, I am in no means trying to imply that the United States is all of Americia, or that the United States is more important than the rest of the Americas. But I should also say that I am not judging the opinions of those who do believe that the United States is more important. Really though, I'm not trying to bring to light that some residents of the United States do believe that the United States is the most important. When I say bring to light, I'm not talking about some little night light you had next to your bed to ward off monsters when you were six, more like the light that comes from a star. Not just any star, but the star that is in our planetary system. And by our planetary system I am of course talking about the solar system. You know, the solar system that is named after our sun, Sol, named after the Latin word for sun, solis. When I said "You know" at the beginning of the last sentence, I did not mean that I expect you to have known the information that followed, I just used it to transition into a fact that some individuals may or may not know. By fact I am by no means implying that it can not be disproved because one would be crazy to say that no idea (or fact for that matter) may be changed or altered over time, by fact I mean that it is our understanding at this current point in time, but could very well change as technology improves and our general understanding of space advances. I may have just implied that technology may be improved, but that could very well not be the case. For some reason or another the human race may be hindered technology wise or even go extinct. Perhaps due to an apocalypse or nuclear winter of some sort. By saying nuclear winter I am not trying to say that this will come from a country such as North Korea. This is not to say that it is impossible for North Korea to be the perpetrator of a nuclear winter, as this very well may be the case. The only reason I say this is that it is also likely that the United States or some other country might be the instigator of such nuclear winter. Just to be clear, when I say instigator, I am not trying to convey that this is a negative action. It could be the case that this particular instigator was trying to broker peace between countries when this triggered a negative reaction for a person which caused them to accidentally press a button to launch the nukes. When I say button, I don't mean a complicated series of buttons leading to a specific action, more like a stereotypical big red button to be comical. Not the kind of comical to make you laugh though, the kind of comical to make you go "huh". This is not to say that "huh" is a negative reaction, because this "huh" is not a negative reaction at all, it is just a reaction that conveys that you thought about the joke, and did not react in a positive way where you laughed, or in a negative way where you despise the joke, more of a middle ground where you acknowledge that the joke was amusing, just not laughable. By laughable I mean- *Morgan Freeman narration begins* "And this went on for so long that the author died during the writing process and the story was never finished. We decided to stop the story here as afterwards the author suffered from a stroke and the rest of the story looks something like this:" -that laugh able was able laughter to be affable af after laughter… *Morgan Freeman resumes* "And so this is where our story ends. The world will never know about the adventures of Randy Dandy and Obama Llama nor will the world ever see what point the author was trying to make. I'm Morgan Freeman and this was Lost Tales with the Talisman."
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