Cipherhunt Archives: Boring, Oregon.

Crystal:
  ARISE, NEW CHANNEL.


DeletedUser:

No

DeletedUser:
  Perfection


Bill Cipher:
  : D

DeletedUser:
  perfection

Smol Dream *C6102Gamer*:
  neat

jolly greg:
  blessedt

Smol Dream *C6102Gamer*:
  This channel is Boring,
  Oregon

DeletedUser:
  **ESSAGEM SDRAWKCAB ESSAGEM SDRAWKCAB ESSAGEM SDRAWKCAB**

DeletedUser:
  Yas!

DeletedUser:
  even though he's already here.

Festive Yung Venuz:
  HUZZAH, A CHANNEL AT LAST FOR THIS GRAND STORY

Bill Cipher:
  <@!126849971784777728> Thanks!

Crystal:
  Ooh, that's actually a wonderful thing.

DeletedUser:
  beautiful

Smol Dream *C6102Gamer*:
  @Festive Yung Venuz >Grand
  GRAND DAD
  @Bill Cipher

Festive Yung Venuz:
  Nothing like actually being able to see the "welcome to the beginning of" message for once.

Bill Cipher:
  FLEENT STONES

Doge Cipher:
  ayyy boring oregon channel

Smol Dream *C6102Gamer*:
  This channel is not boring
   ( ͡^ ͜ʖ ͡^ )

Doge Cipher:
  @ XD

Purple:
  What is this channel supposed to be

DeletedUser:
  a channel for boring

DeletedUser:
  oregon

Doge Cipher:
  for the fanfic

Smol Dream *C6102Gamer*:
  AU

Pyronica:
  yay

DeletedUser:
  is it weird that i space out boring, oregon like that

Purple:
  Ohhh awesome!

Pyronica:
  and i got ice cream now

Smol Dream *C6102Gamer*:
  neat

Doge Cipher:
  ayy

Purple:
  I thought it might actually be hunt related lol

DeletedUser:
  is that actually an encripter message <@!178964701072326657>

DeletedUser:
  may or may not meet the same fate as the last channel made for bill

Smol Dream *C6102Gamer*:
  ayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

DeletedUser:
  haha

DeletedUser:
  encripter

DeletedUser:
  encripted(

DeletedUser:
  *

DeletedUser:
  *encrypted

DeletedUser:
  who wants to cry with me

DeletedUser:
  why

DeletedUser:
  very sad gf music video

Smol Dream *C6102Gamer*:
  *cries*
  k

DeletedUser:
  i cant decode it tbh

Smol Dream *C6102Gamer*:
  What was it?

DeletedUser:
  stan died ;n;

Smol Dream *C6102Gamer*:
  yeah...

DeletedUser:
  rip

Festive Yung Venuz:
  rip

DeletedUser:
  anyone wanna cry with me?

Smol Dream *C6102Gamer*:
  *cries*

DeletedUser:
  I legit cried when I watched it for the first time

DeletedUser:
  like tears

Pyronica:
  i'm to busy eating ice cream

Smol Dream *C6102Gamer*:
  Oh

Bill Cipher:
  https://www.reddit.com/r/gravityfalls/comments/4ushb4/boring_oregon_episode_6/

Smol Dream *C6102Gamer*:
  nice

Bill Cipher:
  Episode 6 is complete, pastebinned, and uploaded onto Reddit.
  Pinned? >:?

Smol Dream *C6102Gamer*:
  Nice

DeletedUser:
  pinned messages

DeletedUser:
  y'see the upper right pushpin icon?

Festive Yung Venuz:
  yeah that
  ^

Bill Cipher:
  huh, whoa!
  didn't know that existed
  thanks!

DeletedUser:
  does it work on mobile yet????

DeletedUser:
  nope

DeletedUser:
  yeah

DeletedUser:
  ;(((

DeletedUser:
  im writing a book c:

Pyronica:
  cool

Procrastidopper:
  DED CHANNEL

Bill Cipher:
  It won't be "DED" when I make episode 7...
  ...eventually
  kek

Procrastidopper:
  DUN DUN DUN
  PLOT TWIST

MK Inst:
  I'M TWAMATISED

Pope Bill's ✝Tahaki✝:
  I really am interested in this series you got going
  I need to start from the beginning

DeletedUser:
  Me as well.

Bill Cipher:
  You can start from the beginning using the link up above!
  Unless you're on mobile I guess.
  https://www.reddit.com/r/gravityfalls/comments/4u5rqc/boring_oregon_an_au/

Pope Bill's ✝Tahaki✝:
  I am on mobile

DeletedUser:
  o

Procrastidopper:
  Y
  E
  S
  YES YES YES

DeletedUser:
  ...

doot man:
  W O O P W O O P

DeletedUser:
  What's Boring Oregon?

AmyTabbyCat:
  a fanfiction written by @TwinBuilder

DeletedUser:
  A place

DeletedUser:
  Oh I'm reading it now ok

DeletedUser:
  OH MY GOD

DeletedUser:
  THIS IS THE GREATEST THING EVER

doot man:
  I KNOW RIGHT

DeletedUser:
  ahhHHH

Bill Cipher:
  <@151069006470578176> Are you starting it from the beginning? Episode 1?

DeletedUser:
  Yes

Bill Cipher:
  Awesome.

DeletedUser:
  This will help me on my wait for the statue and my two books

MK Inst:
  OH MY GOD THE BEST THING JUST HAPPENED

doot man:
  ?

MK Inst:
  I was selecting a quote from this to send to someone
  and when I dragged it, for some reason it displayed the thumb of an image I'd copied hours ago

Bill Cipher:
  ...What was that image.

MK Inst:
  so what happened was this:
  "Mabel reaches for some water. Stan slaps her with his hand.
Stan: No."
  [image randomly appears]
  http://s3-ec.buzzfed.com/static/enhanced/webdr01/2013/6/24/11/anigif_enhanced-buzz-31696-1372088334-12.gif

Bill Cipher:
  HA
  That's still one of my favorite quotes from Boring, Oregon

MK Inst:
  LITERALLY PERFECT IN EVERY WAY

doot man:
  ^^^^^

MK Inst:
  "Nondescript Boy #2: Mother, please. The demon girl is unwell."

For some reason I instinctively read this in the voice of that snobby blue kid with the orange mother from Gumball . XD

Bill Cipher:
  Oh man, that's a perfect voice

Purple:
  heyy I'm reading chapter 6 right now

Bill Cipher:
  Nice!

MK Inst:
  Billy Parham, that's who I was thinking of!
  "Gideon: I am a button and you will treat me as such, scum."
PERFECT

DeletedUser:
  He sexually identifies as a button. He's tumblr.

MK Inst:
  ^^^^^^^^^^^^
  "Mabel: Ow! Stan, would it kill ya to not run over everything??
Stan: Do not talk back to me, woman."

I love how you're written Stan in this.
  "I am catching fish"

OH MY GOD XD XD XD

Bill Cipher:
  I had so much fun writing every episode

MK Inst:
  I can tell
  I'm having a lot of fun reading them
  FIDDLEFORD
  OH WOW
  I HAVE NO WORDS
  Was.... Was that a FNAF World reference.....?
  "Stan: No. Come back here. We are to enter the sea and drown in harmony."
  just.... _wow_
  XD

Bill Cipher:
  Was what a FNAF World reference? Whatever it was, it was unintentional.

MK Inst:
  "Catch you on the flip side."

DeletedUser:
  thats

DeletedUser:
  not a saying that originated from FNaF at all

DeletedUser:
  o3o

MK Inst:
  whoops
  That's where I've heard it from most commenly
  I knew it was a phrase but until FNAF World I thought it was out of use...?
  "Stan... smiles."
>heart giving out

DeletedUser:
  I'm finally on Chapter six now

DeletedUser:
  This is all beautiful

DeletedUser:
  Joage had me in tears of laughter

MK Inst:
  "Stan walks backwards up the stairs, quickly realizing his mistake and walking forwards. View cuts to Dipper and Mabel looking at themselves. A laugh track plays on the television for no discernible reason."

BEAUTIFUL

DeletedUser:
  I am now up to speed

DeletedUser:
  Glorious

DeletedUser:
  Absolutely glorious

DeletedUser:
  https://66.media.tumblr.com/e3a75f6f647e9c6f163e02b48f7e7210/tumblr_nzwlfltpmT1s9bybqo1_500.gif

doot man:
  he imitatin garnet
  HE STEALIN MOVES

DeletedUser:
  irrelevant *deletes*

MK Inst:
  Just got up to Jesus,
  Oh.
  My.
  God. XD

Purple:
  Part 7

MK Inst:
  YES
  "Mabel's head spins 360 degrees around.
Dipper: Eh, not that bad. Demons have disjointed necks.
Vertically.
Dipper: FUCK"

hoooooooooooo boy. XD

Purple:
  I died at that part lmao

MOM HOLY FUCK:
  oh my god im reading the 1st episode for the first time
  "Our uncle had transformed his house into a house he called the house."

Purple:
  lmao i remember that line, such a masterpiece

DeletedUser:
  THE

Bill Cipher:
  A Gravity Falls AU written by me
  https://www.reddit.com/r/gravityfalls/comments/4u5rqc/boring_oregon_an_au/
  Read it all here if you wish!

DeletedUser:
  We need this as an animation

DeletedUser:
  The writing style works really really well in script form

Bill Cipher:
  ***Boring, Oregon:* Season 1, Episode 7 - Readhunters**

Procrastidopper:
  should i alert #general and #serious ?

Bill Cipher:
  Already did.

Procrastidopper:
  yayy

Bill Cipher:
  *Read up on the previous episodes.*
  ***We see a news broadcasting station. Sandra Jimenez walks on set and sits down in her chair.***
  **Shandra: Hello. I am Shandra. I am here to tell you about some non-boring news. We have a special guest on our show today. Everyone, welcome local house owner Stanley Pines.**
  ***Stan walks on screen, sitting down in a chair next to Shandra.***
  **Stan: Thank you, Shandra. It is very good to be here.**
  **Shandra: So, Stan. What brings you here. On this sunny day.**
  **Stan: Well, I have an important announcement to make. To all residents of Boring, Oregon. Each and every one of you.**
  ***View cuts to Stan's face.***
  **Stan: If you have ever heard of a series of books known as "The Telltale Fable," or even worse, seen any of these books, you are to come to my house immediately. I believe there is something *weird* going on in our town of Boring.**
  **Shandra: And how sure are you that our utopia has been broken? Boring has functioned perfectly fine with outside influence for decades.**
  **Stan: Trust me on this, Shandra. I was one of this town's first members. Alongside my brother, Stanford Pines. We have seen this town grow and blossom. And we believe that there is something threatening the peace.**
  **Stan: We are on the hunt for whoever has heard of, seen, or read these books.**
  **Stan: Our lives could depend on it.**
  ***Title theme plays. Make it whatever you hate the most.***
  /afk

Procrastidopper:
  great episode

DeletedUser:
  101010101919

Bill Cipher:
  *We now return to your irregularly scheduled program.*
  ***View cuts to Stan pacing in the house, with Wendy and Soos staring at him.***
  **Soos: Are you sure it was a good idea, Stan. To go and announce that everyone here was living a lie.**
  ***Stan slaps Soos' hand.***
  **Stan: No.**
  **Wendy: Then why did you do it.**
  **Stan: It does not matter if it is a wholly good idea. It was our best idea.**
  ***Dipper and Mabel look up at Stan.***
  **Dipper: What are *we* supposed to do?? We're demons, people aren't just gonna shrug off our existence!**
  **Mabel: Yeah! We're either going to be confirming all their religion's fears! If they don't practice a religion, we're gonna make them realize they should! And they'll die of a heart attack!**
  **Dipper: Hey, that'll be good for Satan.**
  **Stan: Enough.**
  ***Stan ponders this for several seconds.***
  **Stan: You two are to go to my room in the second floor and will stay put. I will do the interrogation.**
  **Mabel: But Grunkle Stan! *I* was the one who got affected by the book in the first place! I mean... if we can find some way to make sure no one gets upset or anything... could I help you?**
  ***Stan looks at Mabel, a steadfast gaze in his eyes.***
  **Stan: I do not mean to anger you, women, but if people saw you here, they would think the book was still corrupting you.**
  ***Stan gets up and walks away.***
  **Dipper: Ha! He thinks you look ugly!**
  **Mabel: ...I'll take that as a compliment!**
  **Stan: Soos. Lead these two charlatans upstairs and return here. We will begin interrogation immediately following the arrival of our first guest.**
  **Soos: Understood, captain.**
  *This is all ad-libbed.*
  ***Soos takes Dipper and Mabel upstairs. He escorts them to the door opposite the room Dipper and Mabel saw the "conference" in.***
  **Dipper: Hey, Soos! What... room does that lead to?**
  ***Dipper points to the "conference" room. Its door is shut. Soos looks at it.***
  **Soos: The room of Stan's brother.**
  **Dipper: ...Ford?**
  **Soos: Have you met him?**
  **Dipper: Ehh... Once or twice.**
  **Soos: Understood. He tends to stay in his room. He does not enjoy interacting with us much.**
  ***Soos opens the door to Stan's room.***
  **Soos: Anyway, here you are. You will stay here. Exactly as Stan has said.**
  **Mabel: Thanks, Soos! I guess.**
  **Soos: No problem, enchilada.**
  **Mabel: ...I'll take that as a compliment! Again!**
  ***Soos shuts the door, leaving Dipper and Mabel to their thoughts. View cuts to Stan's room, which is nigh-spotless. Everything is arranged with perfection and precision.***
  **Dipper: ...You do realize we can hear everything they're saying with our demon ears, right?**
  **Mabel: Ha! Of course! We can *never* go boring!**
  ***Dipper and Mabel put their heads to the ground to investigate. View cuts to the main room of the house. Soos, Stan, and Wendy all sit at a couch with the television off when the doorbell rings. View cuts to Stan opening the door to let a man in. It is Fiddleford.***
  **Stan: Fiddleford. So glad you could join us.**

DeletedUser:
  What's this

Bill Cipher:
  **Fiddleford: Boy howdy, Ol' Pines! It's me, your impromptu rapscallion goody-two-shoes hootenanny, Prospector McGucket!**
  ***Stan exhales sharply.***
  **Stan: Fiddleford. We've gone over this. In. App. Rop. Ri. Ate.**
  ***Fiddleford does a circular spin in place.***
  **Fiddleford: Apologies, Mr. Pines. Please let me in.**
  **Stan: Of course.**
  ***View cuts to Wendy, Soos, and Stan sitting at the couch, with Fiddleford sitting at a chair in front of them.***
  **Stan: Question One. Do you know why you're here.**
  **Fiddleford: I saw the news. What were you thinking making that broadcast? The police are rounding up everyone. Saying anyone who knows anything should be brought here.**
  **Fiddleford: I just announced that our city was increasing in boredom. Why would you go against my research?**
  **Stan: Your research is flawed. You have seen the two Pines demons.**
  ***Fiddleford tenses.***
  **Stan: Question Two. Have you ever heard of the Telltale Fable.**
  **Fiddleford: Heard of. Yes. Seen. I can't recall.**
  ***Stan thinks about this.***
  **Stan: Question Three. Do you have any idea who wrote the Telltale Fable.**
  **Fiddleford: An idea. No. A vague hint. Yes.**
  **Stan: Elaborate.**
  **Fiddleford: I know for certain that whoever this author was used a pen that wrote from demon blood. Blackened demon blood.**
  ***Stan takes out the pen he wrote with earlier, tossing it to Fiddleford.***
  **Stan: Question Four. Did it look like this.**
  **Fiddleford: I... Do not know. But I can tell that this is demon blood. The way it sloshes around... it mimics the movements of the Styx and the Phlegethon.**
  ***Wendy, Soos, and Stan look slightly disturbed. Soos' eyes narrow. His fists tighten.***
  **Stan: You seem very knowledgable about Hell.**
  **Fiddleford: Oh, no. I am not. But... I knew someone who was.**
  ***Fiddleford looks into the distance.***
  **Fiddleford: Sorry. Please, continue with the questions.**
  **Stan: That will be all, Fiddleford. Thank you for stopping by.**
  ***Fiddleford gets up and prepares to leave.***
  **Fiddleford: Thank you for having me. One last thing. I hear there's a convenience store that's reopening downtown. Might want to see if the prices are good.**
  **Stan: Noted.**
  ***Fiddleford closes the door behind him. Stan takes his pen, inspecting it with a keen eye.***
  **Wendy: Can't believe you got the police to investigate this.**
  **Stan: The sheriff and deputy were more than happy to take the case. Not many real crimes go on around here, after all.**
  **Soos: Fiddleford showed up first. They're going off your list of suspects.**
  **Wendy: Which means that up next is...**
  ***Stan nods.***
  **Stan: Prepare yourselves. He approaches.**
  ***The door is kicked open. A man rolls into Stan's house, then backflipping off of the ground, slamming into the door to close it, and using the momentum to kick off the door, vaulting through the air and landing in the couch Fiddleford just sat in.***
  **Tad Strange: HEYA, STANLEY! LONG SEE NO TIME.**
  **Stan: ...*Strange.***
  ***Commercial break.***

DeletedUser:
  Sugoi

Bill Cipher:
  **!leworT lwO teg attog uoY :ecioV sdrawkcaB**
  ***End commercial break.***
  ***View cuts to Tad Strange, whose eyes are facing two completely opposite directions.***
  **Tad Strange: I GOTTSA TELL YA, WHEN THOSE TWO LOVEBIRD POLICES CAME UP TO MY ROCK AND WHERE ACTUALLY *TALKIN* AND ALL THAT FREE-FORM MUSIC TO ME, I WAS EGGSTATIC!**
  **Tad Strange: SO I GOT SOME EGGS AND A LIGHTNING BOLT AND MADE STATIC EGGS. THE LOOKS ON THOSE FACES... NOT QUITE PRICELESS. I'D GIVE IT A PRICE OF...... $327?**
  **Stan: Quit the yelling, Strange. You were contacted for one reason. And it was not to spout drivel.**
  **Tad Strange: GEE, STANLEY, I'D LOVE TO BUT THAT'S A NO CAN DO, HOME SLICE! MY MOUTH IS LIKE A BOX OF CHOCOLATES, YA SEE? AND IT'S ONE WITH NO OFF SWITCH!**
  **Stan: If only I had some sort of remote control I could use. To shut your mouth.**
  **Tad Strange: WHOA PAL! THAT ONLY WORKS ON BLENDIN! THE REAL ONE!**
  **Stan: ...What.**
  **Tad Strange: WAHAHAHA! PRETEND I DIDN'T SAY ANYFIN!**
  ***Soos turns to Stan, whispering in his ear.***
  **Soos: I believe he is unholy. Permission to smite.**
  **Stan: Denied. Let him talk.**
  ***Stan clears his throat.***
  **Stan: You are here to answer questions. Nothing more. Nothing less. We will begin.**
  **Tad Strange: OOH! I KNOW! IS THIS AN AMA?**
  **Stan: An AMA.**
  **Tad Strange: AN ASK ME ANYTHING! YOU ASK ME QUESTIONS AND I ANSWER THEM! LIKE, IF YOU WAS TO SAYS "AYY LMAO, TAD STRANGE, MAMMA MIA, WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE COLOR OF THE ALPHABET?" I'D HAVE TO ANSWER HONESTLY! AND I WILL! IT'S *BLEVENTEEN.***
  **Stan: Enlightening. Anyway, I'm going to have an aneurysm if you continue, and you're going to be legally obligated to pay my medical bills. Question One. What do you know about the Telltale Fable.**
  **Tad Strange: THE TELLTALE FABLE OF THE UNSTABLE TABLE? OOH, THAT'S A GREAT MYSTERY BOOK! WHOOPS! WRONG TIMELINE! ALWAYS FORGET ABOUT THAT, YAKNOW? WAIT, YOU DON'T. BUT *HE* DOES!**
  ***Tad Strange hops off his chair and cartwheels around the room. No one turns to follow his gaze.***
  **Tad Strange: ANYWAYS, YESH! THE TELLTALE FABLE! QUALITY LITERATURE IF I DO SAY SO MYSELF! NEVER HAD THE DISPLEASURE O' READING ONE OF THOSE STEAMING TURDS BUT I KNOW A GUY WHO KNOWS A GUY WHO KNOWS A DUCK WHO KNOWS A GUY! AND HE DID! AND HE *DIED!***
  **Tad Strange: NOW I DON'T KNOW IF YOU KNOW ANY OF THIS HOT INFORMATION, BUT THAT BOOK'S DIRECTLY TIED INTO THE QUANTUM METAFICTIONAL SCRIPTURE THAT DICTATES THE FATE OF EVERY BEING IN ALL POSSIBLE INSTANCES OF EXISTENCE! THEY WERE CAST ONTO OUR PLANET TO TARGET AN UNLUCKY FEW AND MAKE SURE THEIR FUTURES WOULD BECOME AS TWISTED AS POSSIBLE!**
  ***Stan looks at Wendy.***
  **Stan: You're writing this down, right.**
  **Wendy: Every word.**
  **Stan: That's enough, Tad. I can't believe I'm saying this, but thank you. Question Two. ...Do you have any idea who its author is.**
  **Tad Strange: WELL, THAT'S A PRETTY EASY QUESTION TO ANSWER! ONLY QUESTION IS... YOU SURE YOU DON'T ALREADY KNOW THE ANSWER? AND NO, GARNET, IT'S NOT LOVE. SHUT UP.**
  **Stan: Do not play games, Strange. *Elaborate. Now.***
  **Tad Strange: TELL ME THIS DOESN'T SOUND THE LEAST BIT PECULIAR. YOUR FAMILY HISTORY. TWO PLANES OF BEING, INTERTWINED. MORTAL AND IMMORTAL. LIFE AND DEATH. HUMAN AND INHUMAN. THREE BROTHERS. ONE OF THEM DIED AND BECAME THE KING OF HELL. ONE OF THEM DEDICATED HIS LIFE TO MYSTERY AND FOUND HELP WHEREVER HE COULD. HE WANTED HIS OLD LIFE BACK, SO HE GOT HELP IN THE DARKEST RECESSES OF EXISTENCE. HIS WORK GREW IMMORAL IN NINETY-SEVEN DIFFERENT DIMENSIONS - AND THAT'S NOT INCLUDING PARALLEL EXISTENCES AND ALTERNATE OFFSHOOTS.**
  **Tad Strange: IF YOUR BROTHER'S WORK WAS SO HORRIBLE, DON'T YOU THINK HE COULD HAVE STUMBLED UPON SOMETHING? ESPECIALLY IN HELL? HECK, I'D BET HIS ASSISTANT HAS SOMETHING TO DO WITH IT. BUT I JUST SAW HIM LEAVING...?**
  ***Stan is shaking with rage.***
  **Stan: Leave my house.**
  **Tad Strange: BUT I HAVEN'T EVEN GOTTEN TO THE GOOD PART!**
  **Stan: LEAVE! MY HOUSE!**
  ***Tad Strange shrinks where he stands. He swallows his throat and walks to the door.***
  ***He closes it. Soos and Wendy look at Stan, concerned. A single tear rolls down Stan's face.***
  ***He smiles.***
  **Stan: Sorry. It's just. He reminded me of someone I once knew.**
  ***View cuts to Dipper and Mabel, who are still in Stan's room.***
  **Dipper: ...I feel more unclean than the time I swam in the radioactive tar pits for a dare.**
  **Mabel: I feel more dizzy than when I took a ride on a pulsar in that dreamscape attraction at the carnival.**
  ***The two twins fall on the floor.***
  **Dipper: Could Ford have written the Fable? Why?? Why would he want to make peoples' futures miserable?**
  **Mabel: And who was his assistant? Fiddleford?? That... doesn't even make sense!**
  **Dipper: *Why?* Why does nothing in this town make sense? I thought this place was supposed to be a utopia, but the more we look, the more I'm convinced it's falling apart at the seams!**
  **Dipper: If only there was someone we could talk to about this!**
  **Mabel: Dipper... There is.**
  ***Mabel creates the image of a six-fingered hand out of flame.***
  ***Commercial break.***

Festive Yung Venuz:
  Ford'sfiddle

Bill Cipher:
  **Sokka: Drink cactus juice! It'll quench ya! Nothing's quenchier! It's the quenchiest!**
  ***End commercial break.***
  ***View cuts to the door to Ford's room being opened. Dipper and Mabel walk through.***
  **Dipper: ...Ford?**

Festive Yung Venuz:
  I love extracting cactus juice from the source /s

Bill Cipher:
  ***Ford is nowhere to be seen.***
  **Mabel: Ford? Where are you? We're sorry for barging in and all, but... uh... Dipper...!!**
  ***View pans to the ceiling - which Ford is hovering near.***
  **Ford: *It's all just a joke. It's all just a joke. It's all just a joke. It's all just a joke.***
  **Dipper: FORD! What are you doing??**
  ***Ford's head snaps towards the twins.***
  **Ford: *You shouldn't be here.***
  ***Wind whips around the twins.***
  **Dipper: Come on! Why is it that every episode our adventures devolve into being supernatural when they have no business doing it??**
  **Mabel: Maybe because that's what always happens to the show we're parodying!**
  **Fourth Wall: KNOCK IT OFF!**
  ***Ford slowly descends from the ceiling.***
  **Ford: *I know what you're doing. You're asking me about the Telltale Fable. Did Stanley put you up to this. You heard every word of his interviews. Didn't you.***
  **Dipper: Yes! I mean no! I mean yes! We did hear his interviews! But no! He didn't tell us to do this!**
  **Mabel: *We're* concerned! We want to know the truth! Can you tell us??**
  ***Ford hovers in limbo between the sky and the earth.***
  **Mabel: Ford... I want to trust you. Give me the chance.**
  ***Ford reaches the ground. He sighs.***
  **Ford: I'm telling you all I can when I say this. I've been to Hell and back. I mean that literally. Tad Strange, that old son of a monkey, was right. I did have an assistant. He wasn't all that into the weirdness. Didn't like it. He preferred technology.**
  **Dipper: So... Fiddleford worked with you?**
  **Ford: Funny how fate works in Hell. I bet you two know. Time doesn't flow equally with our universe. Someone's future could just as well be their past. You could be locked in broken anachronism. And never know why.**
  **Ford: We saw things down there. Horrible things. Things that made us sure as, well, hell. That we would make sure no other city in the world. Ever went through what we did.**
  **Ford: It was the perfect plan. But Fiddleford wished he could forget it all.**
  ***Dipper looks at Ford.***
  **Dipper: Did... He write the Telltale Fables?**
  **Ford: No. He's not a "bad guy." He didn't want to change anyone's fates. But we met someone that did.**
  **Ford: Dipper, I need to tell you this. I need to tell you to do me a solid. You need to go to Stan. And tell him to stop pursuing this. Tell him to quit it. Tell him to stop investigating who made the book. And never look back.**
  **Dipper: ...I was the one who wanted to know! Aren't you going to tell me??**
  **Ford: You must not know. Just know that no one in this town was responsible. It was the work of something else.**
  **Dipper: Maaan. Talk about an unsatisfying ending.**
  ***Ford shrugs.***
  **Ford: Go to Stan. Tell him. Old wounds are best left closed.**
  ***Dipper sighs.***
  **Dipper: Alright. I'll do it.**
  **Ford: Thank you, demon child. Now leave me. I must return to my work.**
  **Mabel: And your work is...?**
  **Ford: Complicated business. Never done. Writing in a journal is tricky. Especially when gravity falls.**
  **Mabel: Huh??**
  **Ford: Ignore my wordplay. Go.**
  ***Dipper and Mabel hesitantly leave Ford's office, shutting the door. As soon as they leave, he begins to float upwards.***

DeletedUser:
  ***rimshot***

DeletedUser:
  hm, who was transcribing this episode.

Bill Cipher:
  No one
  Continuing now...
  ***View cuts to Stan, Wendy, and Soos. Dipper and Mabel come downstairs. Stan looks at them.***
  **Stan: Children. I made it clear. Go back to my room.**
  **Dipper: Stan... I... Don't think you should keep doing this.**
  **Stan: Elaborate, child.**
  **Dipper: I don't want you finding things you might regret or anything! From what I can tell, this book... It has pretty bad magic going on. Things we shouldn't mess with. Some things are best left unsatisfied. Old wounds... are best left closed.**
  ***Stan thinks about this for many minutes, before sighing and nodding.***
  **Stan: Perhaps you are right. I will call this hunt off.**
  **Soos: You are taking advice from a demon. Unorthodox.**
  **Mabel: Hey, we're the demons that are gonna benefit society! Don't forget that!**
  **Stan: Whatever you say.**
  ***Stan leaves the house.***
  ***View cuts to Stan walking to his car. He looks up and sees the window to Ford's room. He sees a shape hovering near the ceiling, and sighs.***
  **Stan: ...Ford. What are you doing.**
  ***Stan gets in his car and drives away.***
  ***END***
  ***WKH KDQJHG PDQ***

DeletedUser:
  ....

DeletedUser:
  what.

DeletedUser:
  THE HANGED MAN

DeletedUser:
  http://pastebin.com/1wNkNxty ?

Bill Cipher:
  NEXT EPISODE: **Vwdu Fklog**

DeletedUser:
  Star Child

Festive Yung Venuz:
  kthks

Cayden98:
  What is this?

DeletedUser:
  Love

DeletedUser:
  Baby dont hurt me

DeletedUser:
  Dont hurt me

DeletedUser:
  No more

Cayden98:
  O

MK Inst:
  lol

Bill Cipher:
  Bill Cipher reimagining Gravity Falls. Everything is normal except Dipper and Mabel, who are demons. @Cayden98

Cayden98:
  Ahhh. That sounds fun.

Procrastidopper:
  @Cayden98 except everything is too normal

Cayden98:
  Well that's lame. Fuck normal

Procrastidopper:
  @Cayden98 no its great i just mean the characters
  *sigh
  read the thing youll understand

Cayden98:
  Alright ill read the thing

Crystal:
  Link in the topic, it's the best.

Cayden98:
  Alright. Ill read itv when i get the chance. Thanks friends

Bill Cipher:
  It is the curse of Boring.
  (I have no idea)

Party A - Pence Supporter:
  dead

DeletedUser:
  rip

Bill Cipher:
  why are you guys saying this is dead, it's just dead because I'm not doing a new part right now
  it will happen soon

DeletedUser:
  still dead tho

DeletedUser:
  hue

DeletedUser:
  huehuehue

Bill Cipher:
  huehuehuehuehuehuehuehuehuehuehuehuehuehuehue

Purple:
  @TwinBuilder PART 8

DeletedUser:
  Is that today? :D

Bill Cipher:
  Maybe.
  We'll see.

DeletedUser:
  Yay. I always come halfway through. Should really turn on notifications Lol.

Bill Cipher:
  ***Boring, Oregon:* Season 1, Episode 8 - Star Child**
  ***View starts at the living room of Stan's house. All the main characters are watching the television in their appropriate positions. View cuts to Mabel and Dipper chained to a post. Mabel turns to Dipper.***
  **Mabel: Hey, Dipper. Don't you think it's weird how we start every episode watching the TV?**
  **Dipper: Mabel, I swear, if you keep breaking the Fourth Wall, it's gonna sue your ass.**

Festive Yung Venuz:
  The forth wall is dead, long live the forth wall

Bill Cipher:
  **Mabel: ...Is that a threat?**
  **Dipper: No, it's a promise.**
  ***Visible silence for the next ten seconds. Cuts to Stan.***
  **Stan: Ew. *This* commercial.**

Festive Yung Venuz:
  Someone has to repair the wall, and Mabel is making them work overtime

Bill Cipher:
  **Dipper: Huh? What do you mean, Grunkle Stan?**
  **Stan: Come have a look. Kids.**

Festive Yung Venuz:
  But thats good, because the person incharge of the walls is trump.

Pyronica:
  omg

Bill Cipher:
  ***Mabel and Dipper drag themselves across the floor as far as the chain can take them. They get a semi-good look at the television. View cuts to the television, which is displaying a commercial of a tent.***

Festive Yung Venuz:
  Trump built the fourth and fifith walls to keep out the mexicans

Bill Cipher:
  **Nondescript Voice: Are you tired of your boring life being a boring shade of boring. Rather than a quasi-interesting shade of boring?**
  **Nondescript Crowd: There's got to be a better way.**
  **Nondescript Voice: Well, then. You should drag your sorry feet. To meet someone I'd like to call...**
  ***View cuts to a bleak background with a name on it in bold black lettering.***
  ***GIDEON.***

Festive Yung Venuz:
  GIDEON.

Bill Cipher:
  ***View cuts to Mabel and Dipper. They immediately freeze up.***
  **Dipper: Gideon...**
  **Mabel: One of those weirdos on the second floor!**
  **Dipper: Yeah, I couldn't tell Mabel, thanks for bringing back unwanted memories.**
  ***View cuts back to the television. Still shows the view of a tent.***

Festive Yung Venuz:
  only like 9 or 11 episodes to bill

Bill Cipher:
  **Nondescript Voice: I bet you're wondering what's so special about Gideon. Well, I'll tell you. If you can keep a secret.**
  **Nondescript Voice: Gideon is a button. And you will treat him as such.**
  ***Mabel and Dipper groan.***
  **Mabel: Again with the button joke! What even is it?? I don't get it at all!**
  **Dipper: I think it's that he's... cute as a button? But I don't know man, he's not cute at all. He looks like if an angel had a malformed baby and it stayed like that throughout its entire life.**
  **Mabel: Eww, gross! But accurate.**

SplitSuns:
  oh

Bill Cipher:
  **Nondescript Voice: Do not be fooled with other men. Advertising their places of dwelling as a place that you should visit.**
  ***Commercial cuts to Stan's house with Stan standing outside of it.***
  ***View cuts to the couch. All eyes look at Stan. He looks at the television screen.***
  **Nondescript Voice: Gideon's dwelling. The Tent. Is the place where you must go. And it is the place where you must go for a very important reason.**
  **Nondescript Voice: *Gideon... has been expecting you.***
  ***Stan shuts off the television.***
  **Stan: I do believe that is enough television for me.**
  **Dipper: You hate Gideon t--uhhh, you know what, shouldn't mention that. Uh, what I meant to say is... you hate Gideon?**
  **Mabel: Smooth. Real smooth.**
  ***Stan looks at Dipper and Mabel.***
  **Stan: Never go near Gideon. Any of you. He's... a Star Child.**

Crystal:
  (who's transcribing this one, split, me, someone else?)

SplitSuns:
  me

Crystal:
  k

Bill Cipher:
  ***Stan goes up the stairs, leaving Dipper and Mabel to reminisce on the Nondescript Voice's parting words.***
  ***"Gideon has been expecting you."***
  ***Title theme plays.syalp emeht eltiT***
  ***View cuts to Dipper and Mabel playing a game of chess. The board is colored in squares of deep crimson and light blue rather than black and white. One half of the pieces are twisted and crimson, and the other are geometric and blue. Dipper is on the "blue" side and Mabel is on the "red" side. Mabel moves a piece to the other end of the board, knocking one of Dipper's pieces over.***
  **Mabel: I win! Go fish! King me! Yahtzee! [MISSINGNO.] was caught!**
  **Dipper: ...What game do you think we're playing?**
  **Mabel: Checkers, obviously.**
  ***Dipper rolls his eyes. The motion twists his skull to a degree that would be uncomfortable to describe.***
  ***Soos walks over to the twins and sits down.***

SplitSuns:
  ...welp.

Bill Cipher:
  **Dipper: Hey there... Soos.**
  **Soos: That is quite a chessboard. Taken from the inner sanctum of Hell. Am I correct.**
  **Mabel: Oh, yeah! *That's* what this is called! A chessboard! Duh!**
  **Soos: It would do you well not to misinterpret the sacred art of chess. For you may find yourself being a pawn soon enough.**
  **Mabel: ...Huh?**
  **Soos: Nothing. Just offering oblique foreshadowing. That may or may not come to pass. So. That Gideon is a real character.**
  **Dipper: Yeah, you bet! We actually, uh...**
  ***Dipper looks around the room. No one else is there.***
  **Dipper: Look, don't tell anyone, but... We've seen him around before. He doesn't look like he's up to any good.**
  **Soos: He isn't. He is a Star Child, after all. They are notorious.**
  **Mabel: ...Notorious for?**
  **Soos: Existing.**

SplitSuns:
  ...

Bill Cipher:
  **Dipper: Okay! That's it! I've had enough Weird Soos Talk! Yep! Gonna check out from the hotel of What Am I Hearing now.**
  ***Soos grabs Dipper's arm.***
  **Soos: What did I just tell you. Do not misinterpret the sacred art of chess.**
  **Dipper: Hey, wh... Chess has nothing to do with this!**
  **Soos: You're wrong. Star Childs are kings without queens.**
  ***Soos abruptly gets up and leaves.***
  **Soos: I'm going to see. If the mayor has acquired any enchiladas. If not. Then that will not be a problem.**
  **Mabel: S... Sure, Soos! Do whatever you want, dawg.**

SplitSuns:
  what, pope

Bill Cipher:
  ***Soos shuts the door, leaving Dipper and Mabel alone with their thoughts.***
  **Dipper: Kings without queens, huh.**
  **Mabel: Y'know, I'm sorta glad Soos is all mysterious. The opposite is probably murder mode.**
  **Dipper: Figures. The one guy here right now is as likely to kill us as he is help us.**
  **Wendy: What do you mean, "the one guy here right now."**
  ***Dipper and Mabel jump. They turn. View cuts to Wendy, who is behind them.***
  **Dipper: Wendy! What... what are you doing here?**
  **Wendy: This is Stan's house. I work here.**
  **Dipper: But... besides... that?**
  **Wendy: Oh. You mean what am I doing next to two demons. I am just here to tell you something.**
  ***Wendy kneels down in front of Dipper.***
  ***She hands him a bag of ice.***
  **Wendy: For when you need to cool down.**
  ***Wendy walks away.***
  **Mabel: ...Humans are weird.**
  **Dipper: I thought they were boring?**
  **Mabel: Hey, no one ever said they couldn't be both!**
  ***There is a knocking at the door.***
  **Mabel: Soos is back so early?**
  **Wendy: I will get it.**
  ***View cuts to Wendy. She opens the door, but no one is there. She then looks at the ground, picking up a piece of paper. If she was capable of showing emotion, she would look... scared.***
  ***View cuts to Wendy walking to Dipper and Mabel.***
  **Wendy: No. No. No. No. Ice ice, baby. No.**
  **Dipper: Huh?**

SplitSuns:
  what.

Bill Cipher:
  **Mabel: What's happening, Ms. Broken Record?**

Iceguppie:
  You called?

Bill Cipher:
  ***Wendy throws the piece of paper at Dipper and Mabel.***
  ***It looks very co-ordial and hand-crafted, written entirely in cursive.***

SplitSuns:
  kek
  yeah that'd be funny if it was true
  ...
  ...
  ...
  really funny

Bill Cipher:
  ***"Gideon Gleeful has invited the residents of this dwelling to a conference at The Tent. The conference will take place in exactly one hour. Do not be late. Gideon has been expecting you."***
  ***"P.S. This means* all *of you."***

Pyronica:
  @SplitSuns i'm onto you....

Bill Cipher:
  ***Mabel and Dipper finish reading the letter, looking up in shock.***
  **Wendy: This is bad.**
  ***Commercial break.***
  **Bob: Hey, Joe.**
  **Joe: Oh hey there, Bob.**
  **Bob: Mind if I tell ya a story? I mean, while we're waiting.**
  **Joe: Oh, definitely. Go ahead, Bob.**
  **Bob: So I'm watching this show. This show I like.**
  **Joe: Uh-huh.**
  **Bob: And it gets to this intense scene.**
  **Joe: How intense we talking here?**
  **Bob: Intense as the 2041 World Series, Joe.**
  **Joe: Whoa, *that* intense.**
  **Bob: Yeah. So I'm watching this show, and it's at an intense scene.**
  **Joe: Uh-huh.**
  **Bob: And then the show cuts to commercial.**
  **Joe: Like that?**
  **Bob: Like that. Like, snap of the fingers. Commercial.**
  **Joe: Boy, that must have been a pickle.**
  **Bob: Sure it was, Joe. It was annoying as all hell.**
  **Joe: Must feel real bad, watching an intense scene and then commercial.**
  **Bob: Definitely was. Felt horrible.**
  **Joe: I feel bad for anyone going through that right now.**

Pyronica:
  XD

Bill Cipher:
  **Bob: Oh, sure. I extend my condolences.**

Crystal:
  pfff

Bill Cipher:
  **Joe: They must be in agonizing torture.**
  **Bob: Waiting for the show to continue.**
  **Joe: Waiting for a statue to be found.**
  **Bob: Waiting for a gate to be opened.**

Crystal:
  :o

Bill Cipher:
  **Joe: Waiting for a godhead to be revealed.**

Crystal:
  :o

Bill Cipher:
  **Bob: Waiting for a... nah. Fuck this.**
  **Joe: Yeah this joke is shit.**
  **Bob: Basically - fuck you.**
  **Joe: All y'all.**
  **Bob: We're gonna keep you waiting here.**
  **Joe: Till the end of time.**
  **Bob: Hah.**
  **Joe: Heh.**
  **Bob: ...**
  **Joe: ...**
  **Bob: You wanna eat lunch.**
  **Joe: Yeah, sure.**
  ***End commercial break.***

SplitSuns:
  ........

Pyronica:
  best one yet

Crystal:
  Great commercial break.
  Best.

Pyronica:
  very
  ever*

Bill Cipher:
  ***View cuts to Stan and Wendy in the living room alongside Dipper and Mabel. Stan holds the piece of paper.***
  **Stan: So. Star Child finally caught up to us. Didn't he.**
  **Wendy: It would seem so.**
  (Take this somewhere else)

Iceguppie:
  (sorry)

Bill Cipher:
  (it's fine)
  **Mabel: Alright, uh... I get that Gideon's pretty bad, but... How bad are we talking here? Apocalypse bad? Something stuck in the roof of your mouth bad?**
  **Stan: You do not understand. Gideon has requested that everyone in this house attend his conference. That includes the two of you. And that includes... my brother.**
  ***Wendy nods solemnly.***
  **Stan: This is terrible. Terrible and urgent. We must create an emergency conference. Immediately. Wendy. Where is Soos.**
  **Wendy: I do not know. Most likely pursuing the enchilada enigma.**
  **Stan: I should expect nothing more from him.**
  ***Stan turns to Dipper and Mabel, pointing at them to go upstairs.***
  **Stan: I would never ask this of you, but you are now in grave danger. And it is not our fault. This time. So you must attend this conference with us.**
  **Mabel: Uh, okay?**
  **Dipper: A secret meeting? Awesome!**
  **Stan: Wendy. Alert Soos to our predicament.**
  **Wendy: Understood.**
  ***Wendy takes out a flip phone and begins calling Soos.***
  ***In mere seconds, the door opens. Soos stands in the doorway.***

SplitSuns:
  man, marbles and dipstick have come so far

Bill Cipher:
  **Soos: The call of justice awaits.**
  **Dipper: Did you get any enchiladas?**
  ***Soos takes out a food item.***
  **Soos: Just a burrito.**

SplitSuns:
  from being forced to eavesdrop on meetings to joining them

Bill Cipher:
  **Soos: ...Good enough.**
  ***View cuts to Ford's room. Ford is not floating near the ceiling. He is standing with his back turned, just like in the first conference Dipper and Mabel eavesdropped on. Everyone else is standing at various positions around a circular table. Dipper and Mabel are at the far end, but they are not chained to anything.***
  **Stan: Hello, members of my house. We have called ourselves here today to discuss an urgent matter.**
  ***Stan puts the paper onto the table.***
  **Stan: Gideon has requested that all of us go to the Tent. We cannot abide by this for reasons personal to each of us. Wendy. Speak.**
  **Wendy: I can't go because I don't want to.**
  **Stan: A fair rebuttal. Soos. Speak.**

SplitSuns:
  perfect

Bill Cipher:
  **Soos: I can't go because I have allotted said time to meditating on the Word.**
  ***Dipper and Mabel cringe.***
  **Stan: It would not be wise to disturb. Whatever that is. Ford. Speak.**
  ***Ford's back is still turned.***
  **Ford: Gideon does not know I am alive. I would prefer to keep it that way.**

SplitSuns:
  UM

Bill Cipher:
  ***Everyone turns to Dipper and Mabel.***
  **Stan: As to these two. It is blindingly obvious why they must not go. Although I took them on a familial bonding excursion before. The only person knowledgable to their overall existence. Was a man who deals with science and technology. On a regular basis. Him meeting the twins was not the worst outcome. It could have been the best.**
  **Ford: Gideon already knows about them.**
  **Stan: ...What.**
  ***Ford turns to look at Stan.***
  **Ford: I can tell. The twins have entered his Tent before. Even if they were not fully aware of it.**
  **Mabel: Uh...**
  **Dipper: I will neither confirm nor deny--**
  **Stan: Did you two go through the Star door in the second floor?**
  ***The twins hesitate for a few seconds, before begrudgingly nodding.***
  **Stan: When.**
  **Ford: It does not matter when. The point is that they did. And they are in danger.**

SplitSuns:
  oh boy

Bill Cipher:
  **Dipper: We... also might have angered him. Accidentally, obviously, but... I take it that this doesn't help our chances?**
  **Ford: Confrontation with Gideon is inevitable. And should you fall into combat with him - whether verbal or physical...**
  ***Ford looks at the twins.***
  **Ford: You may not be able to cheat the consequences.**
  ***Dipper and Mabel turn to look at each other, horrified.***
  **Stan: Enough mind games. Democratic vote approaches. All of us cannot go. Yet the alternative is...**
  **Dipper: Is what, exactly.**

SplitSuns:
  what makes him so powerful...?

Bill Cipher:
  ***No one talks.***
  **Mabel: Yeah! What makes Gideon able to scare all of you like this?? He's just a little kid!**
  **Ford: No. He is a Star Child. A being forged from the heavens and sent to Earth. Cast down from a realm above.**
  **Mabel: Wha...?**
  **Ford: The point I am trying to make. Is that he resembles an Impurity living inside a human body. He is immeasurably strong.**
  **Dipper: Whoa...**

DeletedUser:
  if i know anything from paper mario it's that star kids are weak :P

Bill Cipher:
  **Mabel: So strong that he could... he could kill all of us?**
  **Ford: He wouldn't. He'd torture us for eternity.**
  **Dipper: Uh, another question! Why would he? Why does he hate you?**
  **Ford: You...**
  ***Ford turns away.***
  **Ford: Old wounds, Dipper. Old wounds.**
  ***Dipper nods uncertainly.***
  **Stan: Democratic vote. Do we go or do we lose.**
  **Ford: No alternative.**
  **Soos: No alternative.**
  **Wendy: No alternative.**
  **Stan: No alternative.**
  ***All eyes turn to Dipper and Mabel.***
  **Dipper: ...Well, I mean... If Gideon came here, could we stop him?**
  **Ford: Theoretically. But only if we had the element of surprise. Something that is virtually impossible.**
  **Dipper: Why? Does he have, I dunno, eyes everywhere?**
  ***The room grows incredibly tense.***
  **Stan: What is your vote.**
  **Dipper and Mabel: ...No alternative.**
  **Stan: There is no alternative to going. What Gideon could do is unthinkable. We must go. Together.**
  ***Everyone gets up, leaving through the door.***
  ***Dipper and Mabel look at each other with fear.***
  ***View cuts to a car pulling up to a tent. The Tent. The Pines family and associates file out of the car, with Dipper and Mabel trying their best to not be seen. No one seems to acknowledge them that much. View cuts to a clear view of the Tent as everyone walks to it proper. Someone walks through The Tent. It is... Gideon.***
  **Gideon: Well, well, well. Stan and friends. We have Stanley - a total idiot. Soos - Mr. holier-than-thou. Wendy - an ice queen.**
  ***Gideon looks up at Ford.***
  **Gideon: ...Do I know you?**
  **Ford: No.**
  ***Gideon turns to Dipper and Mabel..***
  **Gideon: YOU.**
  ***Gideon walks forwards to the twins. They reel back.***
  **Gideon: Hello, children. Thank you for joining me. Trust me. This is much better to the alternative. Which is to say... There *is* no alternative.**
  ***Gideon walks through the Tent before turning back.***
  **Gideon: Please, come in. We have a lot to talk about.**
  ***Dipper looks at Ford.***
  **Dipper: What, exactly, are we here for?**
  **Ford: Gideon's conferences are inscrutable. I have no knowledge of why he has called us here. But I have a guess.**
  ***Ford walks through the Tent. View zooms up to show a star at the tip of the Tent.***
  ***Commercial break.***
  /afk

SplitSuns:
  this is a really long episode
  not that i'm complaining
  more boring oregon is always fine by me

Bill Cipher:
  ***Absolutely nothing of any significance happens in this commercial break.***
  ***Who would have guessed? Not me.***
  ***End commercial break.***
  ***View shows the inside of The Tent. It is exactly as Dipper and Mabel remember it. Gideon is standing at the far end of the room with two people Dipper and Mabel don't recognize. Stan, Ford, Wendy, and Soos awkwardly sit down in some of the many chairs of The Tent.***
  ***View cuts to Gideon. He clears his throat and gestures blandly to the audience.***
  **Gideon: Thank you all for coming. It is a. Pleasure. To be here.**
  ***No one shows any emotion.***
  **Gideon: Now. I take it you just had a conference. Where you decided if you would obey. Or disobey. A direct order. Isn't that right?**
  ***Dipper and Mabel look at each other knowingly.***
  **Gideon: Thought so. See, children. I am a button. But I am more than a button. I am so cute. I always get my way.**
  **Stan: Enough of this. Why are we here.**
  ***Ford begins to write in his journal. Gideon looks at it.***
  **Gideon: That.**
  ***Everyone looks at Ford. He looks up, quickly putting his journal away and muttering under his breath.***
  **Gideon: Boring is a utopia. Isn't it. But it is more than a utopia. Its greatness is concealed under walls of troubled history. The ancient past. The wounds of the elders. I know things. Lots of things. Aren't I cute.**
  ***Gideon paces around his "corner" of the circular Tent.***
  **Gideon: Let us face facts. Things are changing. Evils are stirring. Evils in a town where there is no evil. And you all are the only people. Who aren't crazy. And who'd know about it. So I am going to ask you. Why do you think this is?**
  ***Everyone turns to look at Dipper and Mabel.***
  **Mabel: Is this the part where you go psycho and try to kill us?**
  **Gideon: Perceptive, isn't she.**
  **Soos: Unfortunately.**
  **Gideon: No, my sweet clementine. You are not going to be killed by us here. That would be. Dumb.**
  ***Gideon walks over to Dipper and Mabel.***
  **Gideon: Your presence here is a problem and a solution. The problem is. Impurities are beginning to awaken. The touch of Hell awakens all evil. The solution is. I finally have. A queen.**
  **Dipper: What.**
  **Mabel: A queen?? You think I'm going to... marry you??**
  **Gideon: That was the intended effect.**
  **Mabel: Fat chance! Why would I marry a human? I'm of royal blood, sucker! You can look, but you can't touch!**
  **Gideon: Hah.**
  **Mabel: What's so funny?**
  **Gideon: You called me a human.**
  ***Gideon is surrounded with a blue aura. A similar aura surrounds Mabel. She is slowly lifted into the air.***
  **Mabel: Wh--come on! I've had enough of people holding me in the air against my will!!**
  **Dipper: Put her down, you creep!**
  **Gideon: I just said I wasn't going to kill her.**
  **Dipper: That's not what I... Oh. Double meanings.**
  **Gideon: Yes. It's all just a joke. But anyway.**
  ***Gideon moves Mabel towards him.***
  **Gideon: Here is how this will go. You will be my queen. Together, we will rule Boring, Oregon. A land free from Impurity. The voice of Hell will rule all evil.**

SplitSuns:
  yeah

Bill Cipher:
  **Mabel: Uh, I think we're getting off on the wrong foot here! I mean, we don't really want Impurity! But the way you're talking doesn't really paint you as a good guy! So are you on our side or...?**
  **Gideon: Oh. You must have misunderstood. When I say I want a land free from Impurity. I mean that I want a land where there is nothing pure. And if everything is Impure. Nothing is.**
  ***Ford gets out of his seat.***
  **Ford: No. No. No. No. There is only one being capable of such power.**
  **Gideon: I'm well aware. Stanford. That is your name, right?**

SplitSuns:
  oh god

Bill Cipher:
  **Gideon: Or should I say... Sixer.**
  ***Stan and Ford smile.***
  **Gideon: What.**

SplitSuns:
  incoming sorry
  ...maybe?

Bill Cipher:
  **Stan and Ford: Sorry. It's just. You remind me of someone I once knew.**
  ***Gideon takes a step back.***
  **Gideon: What did you just... Oh. Oooh. Clever. I see what's going on here.**
  **Mabel: Huh?**
  **Stan: Hm.**
  **Ford: ...**
  ***Gideon puts Mabel down, stepping back.***
  **Gideon: I do not need a queen. There is already evil more powerful than us all combined lurking in this town.**
  **Gideon: The only thing I need now... is that Journal.**
  **Ford: You can have it. Over my dead body.**
  **Gideon: I'll pass on that. Corpses are no good for the decor.**
  ***Everyone looks at Gideon, simultaneously scared and ready for a fight.***
  **Gideon: I believe that this will be all. You can go now.**
  **Ford: You... You aren't going to take my Journal?**
  **Gideon: No. Why would I do that now when I can instill paranoia into all of your hearts.**
  **Gideon: I do believe that is enough.**
  ***Gideon turns around.***
  **Gideon: Mother. Father. Escort me to my chamber.**
  **Mr. Gleeful: Yes, Star Child.**
  **Mrs. Gleeful: End me.**
  ***Gideon's parents escort him out of the Tent.***
  ***Gideon turns around one last time.***
  **Gideon: Oh, Dipper and Mabel? Ford was right. You should watch out for the mystery in the Mystery Shack. See you later.**
  ***Gideon leaves everyone alone with their thoughts.***
  **Stan: We are lucky.**
  **Soos: Very lucky.**
  **Wendy: Obscenely lucky.**
  **Ford: Yes.**
  **Dipper: Mabel... You okay?**
  **Mabel: F-fine. Let's just... go.**
  ***Dipper looks at Mabel, concerned.***
  **Dipper: Yeah. Alright.**
  ***Dipper turns to look at Ford.***
  **Dipper: Hey, Ford... Why did Gideon want your Journal?**
  **Ford: Well, it makes sense.**
  ***View zooms in on the Journal, emblazoned with a 4.***
  **Ford: He's already got the other three.**
  ***END***

SplitSuns:
  WHAT

Bill Cipher:
  ***OLNH D FRPHW***

SplitSuns:
  http://pastebin.com/6dPErvY9
  good read, as always

DeletedUser:
  Oh snap

DeletedUser:
  ...the even bigger question...

DeletedUser:
  what's in them now

DeletedUser:
  because i mean if it was the universe portal then gideon would have made one

DeletedUser:
  you know i still don't know how gideon didn't figure out that there were 3 journals

MK Inst:
  "Gideon: Mother. Father. Escort me to my chamber.
Mr. Gleeful: Yes, Star Child.
Mrs. Gleeful: End me."

This... This is beautiful.
  .
"Ford: He's already got the other three."

...._WGRSTRFRGH_
  OH HELL NAW

DeletedUser:
  it's probably different in this w