[Hisao] The Counterattack: Part 2

Kenji and Hisao Extra: The Counterattack

Part Two: Preparation

I don't know why I even decided to participate in this. I mean, I was originally forced into Kenji's room, just to have this whole plan involving his feminist conspiracy viciously crammed down my throat, but I could have just easily declined and went back to the warmth of my bed right? But yet, here I am, at 3:30 AM, creating the most beautiful and well planned out snow fortress I've ever laid eyes upon. When Kenji said he had this 'shit planned out already', I was assuming that he actually had put minimal thought into it.

Well, it turned out to be just the opposite.

The fortress is well underway now. With a good foundation and walls spanning upwards a good two feet so far, I'm actually starting to enjoy this. The only problem is that we actually need to commence the plan. How the hell am I going to get all of these girls to show up and be here at the same time? I could just send out a text saying "Hey, come to the park around 2:30 and don't be late!", but how many of them would actually take the initiative to show up? I've got to think of something much, much better than that.

I figure I should give Kenji a bit of praise, though. Other than having a solid plan for this fortress, proving to me with mathematical evidence and loads of charts as to why it was a good idea to get out so early and do this, he actually gave me ten minutes to get my shit together and prepare to fight the cold. When I was on my way out the door the meet Kenji at the park, I peered over at the thermometer that was mounted on the wall right next to the double doored entrance to the dormitory.

It read 16 degrees in Fahrenheit.

There was no two ways about it, I wasn't going to feel warm for about another 17 hours. Hopefully, by then, this will be ended and I'll be able to hole up in my bed. I guess I shouldn't expect too much, though, considering Kenji could wage this 'war' for more than one day. I guess we'll find out when those moments come up.

I made my way down onto the concrete path and remembered that Kenji said we would be creating the fortress in the park. The park is a good walk across the campus of the academy, so I put my hood up and trudged through the ever growing amount of snow. When I first arrived, Kenji had already drawn an outline in the snow, having perfectly measured out marks of where the walls needed to go, as well as how long and wide they needed to be.

As I continue to think through what had led to me working on this glorious fortress at what was now almost 4:00 AM, I realized how much I actually enjoy being around Kenji. Sure, the son of a bitch is crazy. There is absolutely no other way to put that. But, beyond his craziness and insanity lies a dude who you can't really hate being around, simply because he never stops being himself regardless of who he's around.

My thoughts are quickly interrupted by Kenji's voice.

"Bro, this shit is turning out great. In fact, it's almost exceeding my expectations." He remarks with a complementary tone. I think, in fact, that this may have been the first time since I've arrived at Yamaku that he's given me a complement. Well, that's disregarding all of the 'you're such a bro, Hisao' stuff that he throws around almost every day. "If we keep this load going for another hour, we may have some time to reinforce the outside span of the walls. This shit is fucking gold, bro, we're going to show those feminist bitches who they're dealing with!"

With that, I remember that he, indeed, does believe that all of my friends are in on this 'feminist agenda'. It's kind of depressing, actually, simply because I know I'm going to end up tricking all of them into getting pelted with snowballs. Hopefully they dress warm, because if they don't, I have a feeling I'm never going to hear the end of it.

As I'm going through the motions of packing snow together, creating grooves and cuts to create a solid structural and good looking wall, I can't help but to think of a question for Kenji.

"Kenji, you do realize that this 'battle' here is going to the two of us versus eight of them, right? This is going to end up being a lot more difficult than we're expecting it to be..." My voice trails off. I know for a fact that, if this doesn't end up the way he wants it, the girls will have both of us on the ground while shoving mounds of snow down our clothing.

Well, shit. This could end up really bad now that I think about it.

"Kenji, it's not too late to-"

"Bro, are you seriously terrified of some crippled girls?" He cuts in, attempting to give me a short motivational speech. "I thought you were more of a man than that. How the fuck can they overpower us if the two of us together have the strength of 20 of them?" He pauses for a moment, gathering himself to deliver a grand speech. I honestly wouldn't have been surprised if he prepared this in his plans, just in case I was having second guessing the operation at hand.

"Son, we've been on the defensive for far too fucking long! They've sent wave after wave of attacks on the male race, trying to wipe us out, trying to degrade us and weaken our troops. Well, I'll tell you something man. If we pull a victory out of our asses against these feminist forces, we will go down in history as the greatest two men to ever set foot at Yamaku. We, Hisao Nakai and Kenji Setou, will go down in history as the men who, as a combined force, took down the evil opposition! We will be-!"

I cover his mouth with my hand. He's, at this point, yelling his motiviational speech,at about 4:30 in the morning. I figure if he keeps it up much more, we'd just end up getting in trouble and all of this would be for naught. He struggles and squirms his head away from my arm and hand, looking shocked and extremely pissed off. I figure I have a bit of explaining to do.

"Sorry man. I just don't want you to, uh..." I pause for a moment. I figure he honestly doesn't care about waking up others, so I need a better excuse for interrupting his 'motivational' speech. "...inform the feminist spies of our operation. You never know when one of them could be hiding out in the trees, or if they've planted listening devices all around the school." I don't think that came out right. As if he wasn't paranoid enough around women, I think I may have just given him another reason to be locked up in his room with his blinds closed.

"You think I don't know this shit already, bro?" Phew. That's a relief. He was already... wait. He was already under the belief that they had spying devices planted around campus? "Boy, I've been here for a long, long time. I've always kept my eyes open for suspicious activity from the opposing front, looking out for people trying to plant shit. Trash cans, benches, trees, anything. They've got shit EVERYWHERE that could give away our plan. Luckily enough, I have some insider information. None of the girls we'll be waging war with have listening devices with them. I can scream as loud as I want, and those bitches still won't know what hit them."

I should have figured this out by now. Kenji is consistent in his efforts against the 'opposing front'. He probably was out here around midnight, scourging the area for implanted devices that could listen to us while we prepare our fort.

After the completion of that little rant, he fell quiet. I guess my interruption made him forget completely about delivering the rest of his speech. So now, at 4:45 AM with light beginning to creep up over the horizon, we fall silent and continue our work into the fast approaching dawn.