YuYuYui - Ishitsumugi no shou 62

Little sparrow's big turmoil - 1

[Hero Club room]

Uta: U~m... Uu~~m...

Gin: Is Utano-san reading a book?

Sum: Judging from her repeated groaning, it seems like a rather difficult read.

Son: I'm curious~.

Mit: The difficult part is more that she's looking for a solution. There's a sparrow problem at the fields, which caused horrible damage...(*1)

Suz: I didn't do anything!!

Gin/Son/Sum: Waah!?

Mit: Y-You scared me! Kagajou-san, where did you come from!?

Suz: One of my traits is that I butt in whenever I hear people talking about me because I'm worried they're badmouthing me.

Uta: That's the problem!

Uta: I underestimated the sparrows' traits. I didn't know they would be this gluttonous!

Suz: I'm asking just to be sure, are you~...

Mit: It's birds. Birds. She's not talking about you.

Uta: I don't know why, but lately there's a flock of sparrows storming my fields, and devouring all of my crops!

Uta: I tolerated them for some time, but this is getting out of hand...

Uta: Even the kind-hearted farm king has had it come on in the head and finally got around to finding a plan.

Gin: Come on in the head?

Sum: She surely means she lost her cool...

Uta: Since you're here, does anyone know and would tell me about the sparrows' weaknesses?

Son: Money?

Suz: Yeah, yeah, sparrows always are short on money... Wait, oooooi! That's me!

Sum: If I remember correctly, I've heard that small birds don't like big ocellated patterns.

Uta: I've tried that, they stayed on their guard for half a day and came back right after.

Gin: What do you think of letting cats run free in your fields? Luckily, there's an abundance of cats in Sanshuu!

Uta: Cats... But they'll do their business in the fields, won't they? This would be a problem.

Son: Can't you use it as fertilizer~?

Uta: It wouldn't work. Cats'... isn't good for the plants and they'll die.

Mit: It's a difficult issue...

Suz: Rather than real cats, what about fake cats, with recordings that you'll let play continuously?

Uta: Aah, this could work. Thank you, Suzume-san.

Suz: Don't mention it. Do your best then.

Uta: It's a lucky day for ideas! Everyone, let's do this together!

Gin/Son/Sum: Ooooh!

Suz: Eh, everyone? Me too!?

Uta: You're the one who came up with the idea, so of course? To the fields, let's go♪

Suz: Tohoho... I pray that nothing troublesome happens...

Note: Whenever sparrows come up in this scenario, it's pronounced as "Suzume" and prone to confusion.


Little sparrow's big turmoil - 2

[Fields]

Son: The cat dummies have been installed♪

Mit: D-Dummy... Sonoko-chan. All of these are... Sanchos, right?

Suz: So Sancho is a cat...

Gin: What did you think it was, if not a cat?

Suz: Eh, what...? Some strange... bacteria?

Son: Bacteria!?

Sum: Now, it's fine. We will proceed by playing the cat noises.

Meow~meow. Meooo~w. Meo~w. Meo~w. Meof~.

Uta: Alright... What does this... Ah.

Mit: Waaaaah! Utanon! The sparrows! There's a huge group of sparrows approaching!

Suz: Hyeeeeeeeeh! Scary, scary! Help meeeeeeeeee!

Uta: A...Aa...ah... Failed... again... Noo~~. My vegetables...

Gin: It's a huge mess... These sparrows are cruel.

Son: That's... worse than I expected~. You can't take sparrows lightly...

Sum: By pecking with their tiny beaks, they don't eat them cleanly, but instead leave them full of holes, which is a shame.

Uta: Damn you... Sparrows. You've made the farm king perfect angry...

Suz: Uuh... Could you stop saying sparrow all the time? This isn't good for my heart...

Mit: Utanon. Being angry is one thing, but what are you going to do?

Uta: An eye for an eye! A tooth for a tooth! A bird for a bird! Crow! Hawk! Eagle!

Son: There are none~. There are no more owls or all other species of bird of prey anywhere~.

Gin: The only bird the Hero Club knows about is Takeshita-san's Kyuu-chan, but...

Sum: While hill mynas are smart, their ability to speak doesn't correlate to their strength...

Uta: Talk... This!

Mit: What?

Suz: Suzume-san, it's you! You're a sparrow in some way, please be our deal maker and convince them!

Suz: Haaa!? What are you saying!? I'm human! A Hominidae Hominini! From Homo Sapiens ancestry!

Uta: Please, please! Aren't you saying chirp all the time!?

Suz: I'm only doing it to sound cute, that doesn't mean I can speak sparrow!

Gin: Still, what's the worst that could happen if you tried? You never know, it might work.

Son: Yes, yes. Once I said "maa~" to a goat and a lot more gathered around me~.

Sum: Sonocchi... What are you doing?

Suz: R-Really...? Well... Just one try, that's all. Chirp. Chirp chirp. Chirp.

Mit: It doesn't seem like they're listening... They're poking around as usual...

Suz: See. I told you that wouldn't work.

Uta: Don't give up! Just like when I mastered English, if you keep speaking, you'll get through to them one day!

Suz: Isn't this nonsense going too far!?

Uta: These fields being destroyed isn't only my problem, but everyone in town's as well! Please rescue us, Suzume-san!

Suz: Haa~~... If you say it like that, you're embarrassing me... Chirp chirp.

Sum: A-Ah...?

Mit: They went... quiet.

Gin: H-Hey... The sparrows stopped eating all at once and are looking this way...

Son: That reminds me of something~. There was this horror movie where people were attacked by a flock of birds~.

Suz: Awawawawa... Why did you have to remember it? S-Scary... Don't look at me...


Little sparrow's big turmoil - 3

[Fields]

Sum: All the sparrows are intently staring at Suzume-san without moving an inch...

Suz: Eeeeh...?

Son: It's like they're feeling something for her~.

Uta: What are you waiting for, Suzume-san!? Talk, talk! Keep talking to them!

Suz: Eeh!? ...Chirp! Chirchirp! Ah, chirp chichirp chirp chichirp♪

Gin: Eeeeeeeeeeeh!? They all started singing at the same time!

Uta: Ah~, it's like when you say "yes♪" to a foreigner, and they think you understood and start speaking fast.

Suz: And you let it happen!?

Uta: Keep going already! Make them understand our feelings!

Suz: Ah~, chichikchirp! That's itchirp! Please go away, chirp♪

Son: Huh~? They're looking here with what looks like a "hmph" face~.

Mit: Did they understand... or did they not...?

Suz: Of course they didn't!

Uta: Then let's be more forceful. Pressure them! Because these fields are the farm king's turf!

Suz: Chirp! Chichichirp! Chitchirptchirp! The farm king says no, no, yo, chirp!

Uta: Why are you rapping!?

Suz: Because rappers are scary! By imitating them, it'll pressure them!

Gin: Ah~. It doesn't look like they agreed. And by the way, what even is that idea...?

Suz: Chitchitchitchitch, chichirpchichirp! Over there, go away, chitchitchirp!

Son: Hei, ho~o!

Gin: Hooo!

Suz: Can't go here, chichichirp! Bring it on, see if you can! Chirp!

Suz: The Hero Club's strong, chirp! We'll put you KO with one punch and make you go chirping to your mama, yo!

Sum: The proportion of "chirp" is decreasing...

Gin: Ah... The sparrows started looking at each other and tilting their heads!

Uta: Did it... work!? Hooray! Good job, Suzume-san!

Mit: W-Wait... They're raising their feathers, it's like... they're angry...?

Son: Awa... Awawawa...

Suz: Hogyaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!?

Gin: Waaaaaaaaah! All the Suzume-sans are focusing their attack on the sparrow!!

Sum: It's the opposite, Gin! The sparrows are attacking Suzume-san!

Son: But she actually communicated with them~. So it's possible to talk with the heart of all living beings~.

Suz: This doesn't matter, help meeeeeeee!! Nooooooooooooo!!


Little sparrow's big turmoil - 4

[Fields]

Suz: Eee~~k! Sorry, sorry. I won't do it again, forgive meeee~~.

Gin: Suzume-san is getting bullied by sparrows...

Mit: She lost all will to fight back... Not that I can blame her...

Uta: Haa... Do I have no other choice but to cover my large field with acrylic plates...

Son: They would break through vinyl with their beaks~...

Meb: Suzume, what are you doing here!? Didn't I tell you we had an important training planned for today!?

Suz: Hyeh, Mebu! Sorry, sorry. I won't do it again, forgive meeee~~.

Uta: Wait, Mebuki-san. It's my fault because I asked Suzume-san for her help. Don't be upset at her.

Fuu: Hey, Utano! Why didn't you pick up the phone!? The greengrocer came to me to contact you!

Uta: Fuu-san? Ah... Sorry. I didn't notice it at all. A lot happened...

Fuu: A lot... Oh? This is an unusual lineup we have here. What were you doing?

Mit: Well... We did this and it was troublesome.

Meb: Haa!? You forgot about our training to drive away sparrows?

Suz: B-But they're so horrible, you know!? Flocks of sparrows are... scary and strong... Really...

Fuu: Eeh? Those tiny birds?

Suz: Hyee~~h! See that! They're looking! Glaring at meee~~!

Meb: ...I will not tolerate a sentinel to be terrified of small birds. Suzumeeee!

Suz: Yesh!

Gin: H-Huh? Suzume-san and the sparrows froze.

Fuu: So? Is the sparrow damage really that bad? They can't possibly eat that much.

Uta: You're making a huge mistake! Since they peck around, almost all crops are damaged and unusable!

Uta: At this rate, it will be impossible to harvest seasonal fruits and vegetables, let alone sell them to stores...

Uta: The Hero Club may even lose their food supply, you know!?

Fuu: WWW-Whaaaaaaaaaat!? Y-You god damn sparoooooooows...

Suz: H-Hyeh!? P-President! I'm unrelated! The sparrows that are all feathers did it!

Fuu: Sparrows~. how dare you steal precious veggies that should have been going to my stomach!

Mit: Fuu-san is seriously angry!?

Son: This is dangerous~. Sparrows, Get out of here, get out of here, Sonoko's hair.(*1)

Gin/Son: Ahahahaha!

Sum: How can you laugh in this situation... Look, Fuu-san is bright red!?

Son: Return! Little sparrows, get out of here, get out of here, the president is coming~!

Fuu: Sparrows! The vegetables of this field are ours. They're my foooooooooooooood!!

Meb: I won't get easy on you either for disturbing Suzume's training! If you have something to say, then come!

Uta: A-All the sparrows... are flying away. Mebuki-san's passion for training and Fuu-san's gluttony won?

Fuu: The writer Bernard Shaw once said "There is no love sincerer than the love of food."

Gin: I-Is this okay...? The sparrows we drove away will starve to death...

Fuu: It's okay. There's a lot of food in the mountains, Utano's fields just made them used to gourmet food.

Sum: I see. It's similar to wild bears picking human leftovers once, leading to them coming more frequently to towns.

Son: They literally had increased expectations~.

Suz: Phew~. They're not coming back after something this scary! Or at least I wouldn't.

Meb: Suzume, you will receive your penalty for skipping training. 20 laps around the beach, starting right now!

Suz: Eeh!? You're going to kill me~~! And I even worked so haaaaaaaaard~~!

Uta: I see now. I should've asked the people Suzume-san is scared of instead of her! It was an eye opener♪

Note 1: Sokonoke = Get out of there, Sonoko no ke = Sonoko's hair.