[AB/DL] The Pampered Bandits

Somewhere in the high-end kingdom of Doveria, two criminals strolled down the alabaster sidewalks. To be more accurate, one was being carried in a stroller, whilst the other merrily pushed them forward, diaper bag over her shoulder.

"Oh, come on. This is the dumbest idea you've had so far. Everyone wears diapers, Malina! Especially someone like me. People are gonna notice!" Addie Tinkerspark said, pouting in her child-sized gown.

"You may be a Gnome, but you can pass as a youngling. You're cute, got big eyes, and nothing much on your chest! It's almost the perfect disguise. Besides, if someone stares at you for too long, I can call them out as being...well, a pervert." The muscly Orc replied, looking down at her accomplice.

“Well--hey, wait a minute! Did you just call me flat-chested?! I am NOT--”

“Hey, keep it down! You’re gonna attract unnecessary attention. Here, have some cookies.” She whisper-shouted, putting a brown bag of fresh pastries in her lap.

“Hm. Fine. Ooh! These are delicious!” Addie beamed, nibbling on a cookie larger than her own hands.

“Now, I need you to be in character. Let’s review. What do you call me?”

“Mama.”

“Good. What’s the plan?”

The pigtailed Gnome sighed, before speaking out of memory. “You say you’re looking for a specific perfume in the aisles, and then I throw a tantrum.”

“And what do you want?”

“I want...baba. Oh, Gods, this is so stupid! I’m a master thief, not a big baby!” The gnome kicked her legs, causing the gown to reveal her poofy plastic posterior. Pastel numbers and green dots covered the white diaper’s surface, and it was thick enough to force the gnome’s little legs apart.

“Hey!” Malina scolded, sticking a pink pacifier in the little criminal’s mouth. “Keep. It. Down. We’re near the apothecary. Wait for my cue.”

The babified shortstack nodded with determination, and hugged a teddy bear as she suckled. If she were going to be a true criminal, she’d need to pull off this act of difficult trickery. And acting innocent, is one of the hardest things to do.

As Malina opened the door, a bell rang in the humble, but expensive store. A High Elf smiled at the duo, keeping away his military-diaper erotica novel.

“Good morning, madame! Welcome to my humble shop. What padding perfume would you be looking for?” He grinned, standing confidently.

“You don’t happen to have anything for infants, don’t you?” She chuckled, looking at Addie.

“Oh, I’m so sorry, madame. We just ran out of those. I do have some exotic aromae for a well-to-do lady such as yourself~” He half-flirted, going through his secret stock.

“No need. I’ll be browsing through your stock. Where would your strongest brews be? My husband has been whining about my...messing habits.” She flirted back, lifting her skirt to reveal a thick, well-filled plastic pamper. A blue line wrapped around it, smudged by her passive accident.

“Oh my! What a stinker you are, madame~ The strongest perfumes are at the back.” He blushed, ogling her diaper as he playfully fanned the air.

“Thank you, sir.” She slyly smiled, slightly lifting her skirt as she turned to the aisles. The Elf had a bulge in his damp diaper, seeing the heavy sag of the buxom Orc lady. He sat down and flustered, focusing once more on the story about the she-paladin who cleansed sinners with her diapers.

“I thought you were supposh to be profeshnull!” Addie whisper-shouted through her pacifier.

“Well, it’s a method. Never question my methods, sweetie pie.” Malina taunted, booping the gnome’s nose.

“Grr! I oughtta--ahh…” She was cut off by the emptying of her bladder. The baby-print padding swelled, the white turning into light yellow in an instant.

The Orc giggled, patting her accomplice’s warm diaper. “You’re doing great. Now, get ready. I'm gonna secure the goods.”

“Oh! Wight. Suwe.” The Gnome snapped out of her relaxation, nodding as she continued to suckle on her binky.

Malina had brought the stroller to the back of the apothecary, and eyed some crystalline flasks. They were filled to the brim with glowing, radiant perfumes, their hues shining brighter than Addie’s big eyes as  the two stared at their haul.

“Well...ish not gowd, but it’s good enuf!” The Gnome whispered, looking at the potions as she clasped her hands together.

“Alright, let’s do this.” The Orc smiled, before grabbing handfuls of expensive perfumes, and stuffing them in her diaper bag. Each expensive piece of glass snugly fit in between folded diapers, and she hoped it would be a clean getaway. All twenty of the finest perfumes in the kingdom were now in her inconspicuous bag. She gave it a little shake, and to her surprise, the rustling of diapers were heard. Not a single hint of their haul.

“Yes! Okay, do it.”

“I wan’ baba.” She meekly said, her voice sounding identical to the age she was acting.

“No, louder! Make a scene! Uhm...pretend I deserve to be screamed at!” Her accomplice shout-whispered.

“I WAN’ BABA! GIMME! I WAN’ IT!” She grabbed at a flask on the shelf, before tossing it to the ground. It shattered loudly, and green liquid pooled on the floor.

“Oh dear...madame? What’s going on? Are you alright?” The shopkeeper jumped out of his seat, running down the aisle.

“Damn it, Addie!” She snarled at the Gnome, who continued to throw her tantrum. Her partner began to kick and scream, her high-pitched voice truly sounding like a young brat at work. The stroller she laid in began to shake, her kicking and punching delivering unnecessary force to the tiny vehicle.

“I’m so sorry! She’s hungry again. I’ll try to pay you back, I--”

“Oh, no, madame. It’s alright. It is best that you go on your way and feed the little one. I shall clean up this mess.” He sighed, looking into the stroller.

Malina turned the pram away, sweating slightly at the shopkeeper’s reaction. “Thank you! I’ll--” She was cut off by a pacifier hitting her head, landing back into the carriage. The Orc looked at Addie, who gave a sly, almost cackling expression as she snuggled with her teddy bear.

“--I’ll be going now. Take care!” The tall thief called out, before snarling at the Gnome. “If I were your mama, your bottom would be as red as a tomato!” She whispered, as they headed out the door, loot intact.

“Ha! That was fun.” Addie beamed, as she laid in the stroller with content.

“Yeah. You’re one to talk about ‘being professional’. You made my heart stop, you little fiend!” Malina chuckled, rustling the tiny thief’s hair.

“Well, you told me to make a scene...so I did! And thanks to your charm, our earnings are in a place where no one would dare to look. The Pampered Bandits strike again!” The little Gnome smiled, kicking her feet in joy.

“Aww. You’re actually quite adorable, you know that? Tell me, do you like acting like this?” Malina grinned, fixing her cohort’s upturned gown.

“It’s got a charm to it. I like it! I think we could do this again…” Addie beamed, as the two walked out of the town district.

--

Hours later, the Orc and the Gnome were in their hideout, which was an apartment in Doveria’s west end. If one were to stumble in, they would think it belonged to a business owner, or even a high-ranking magi. In reality, it is the fruit of the Pampered Bandits’ labors. White marble walls, and couches lined with gold and only the softest fabric. The value of the things they stole translated well into their profits, as the two could easily pay their exuberant rent, and then some.

Addie rested in her bedroom, lying down on a purple-dyed satin bed. The luxury of her room was totally contrasted by her outfit; she wore nothing but a fully-loaded pair of Snuggies, the so-called 'favorite diaper of the royals'. It was her favorite too.

"Malina? You gonna change me yet?" She asked, still on her back. The Gnome patted the front of her warm, squishy padding, before adjusting her tapes. They began to slip even as they were in the black market, hours ago.

"Quit your whining, you big baby. Mommy's here." The Orc devilishly smiled, holding up her changing supplies.

"Hey, I thought the jig was up!" The Gnome girl half-complained.

"Well, you said you liked your little role, so...I'm paying it forward. If you know what I mean." Malina giggled, as she untaped her accomplice's diaper.

"Oh! Uhm...thanks. I guess." She flustered, as the buxom Orc wiped her down.

As Malina changed Addie's plump, swollen diaper, a silence permeated throughout the room, as much as the Gnome's load wafted in the air. It was like nothing they had experienced before. A moment of intimacy, not as partners-in-crime, but as partners-in-padding. Or to be more accurate, as friends. The two had been together for years, stealing and swindling their way to the top. And only now, it seemed, that they saw themselves as something deeper.

"There you go! You're all clean for bedtime, honey bunny." She cooed, patting the Gnome's fresh diaper.

"Honey bunny? Are you drunk or something?"

"Oh, no. I just feel...different. Since I'm your--never mind. I'll just hit the hay. Good night, Addie." Malina grinned, walking out of the bedroom.

"G'night, mommy." She blurted out.

The Orc lady turned around, and the two flustered like peasants in a pompous playroom. "Did--did you just-"

"Yeah. I...I dunno why I said it, really. Must be my acting skills, huh?"

The Orc giggled, covering her flustering face. "It sure is, Addie. Sure is." She said, walking to her own room.

--

Later that night...

Malina stirred in her sleep, her triple-XL diaper warming up her bed like a pyromancer's spell. It sloshed between her thighs, as she tossed and turned under the sheets. The Orc's uneasy slumber was interrupted by the opening of a door, light pouring into the room.

"M-Malina? Can I s-sleep with y-you?" Addie sniffled, seemingly on the brink of tears. The green-skinned bandit sat up, and saw her partner clad in nothing but her padding and a pair of fur slippers, hugging a teddy bear.  Her Snuggies sunk to her knees, hanging low and loaded. Even in the dim lighting, she could make out her saturated yellow padding.

"Oh! Are you alright? Come here, sweetie." She gestured her to climb into bed, her face full of concern. Addie followed suit, crawling on her friend's bed before lying next to her.

"I--I had a nightmare...c-can we leave the lights on? Please?" Addie pleaded, her eyes watering as she looked up at the Orc.

"Aww. Don't cry, honey. I'm here. Mommy's here. Don't be scared." Malina wrapped one arm around her short-stack friend, while the other turned on the lights. She embraced the little Gnome, and the tiny bandit's sniffles faded.

"Thanks." Addie said. The fear stopped her from saying more.

"Anything for a friend." The two gingerly smiled at each other, as they embraced each other under warm, orange light. They drifted off into sleep, their diapers growing fuller by the hour. As the night went on, the two felt a sense of comfort, not like they had felt before. It transcended material goods, and lavish beds with feather-filled pillows. It was safety. It reminded them of their childhoods, knowing that they could rest peacefully, without a care in the world. Such a thing was abstract to the two, for they were bandits. Thieves. Rogues.

But even the callous need to be soft.

The end.