ADVENTURE Ch. 55 - What Would Have Happened

Ark ---------- Raynar Danakar ------ http://www.myth-weavers.com/sheetview.php?sheetid=399678
CommodoreJim - Drominus Hellcleave - http://www.myth-weavers.com/sheetview.php?sheetid=381991
CommodoreJim - Melange ------------- http://www.myth-weavers.com/sheetview.php?sheetid=463188
Eltrotraw ---- Tombs the Gunman ---- http://www.myth-weavers.com/sheetview.php?sheetid=376543
Deathfish64 -- Pikkupstix ---------- http://www.myth-weavers.com/sheetview.php?sheetid=376612
Deathfish64 -- Ekans --------------- http://www.myth-weavers.com/sheetview.php?sheetid=463132
Moonside ----- Elsa ---------------- http://www.myth-weavers.com/sheetview.php?sheetid=471952
Skeleton ----- Freddie ------------- http://www.myth-weavers.com/sheetview.php?sheetid=381882
Skeleton ----- Warty Morty --------- http://www.myth-weavers.com/sheetview.php?sheetid=438457





* Now talking in #adventure
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<Skeleton> Okay but I'm gonna head home first, will get there in about 40 minutes
<Moonside> Ok.
* Skeleton ([email protected]) Quit (Ping timeout)
* Skeleton ([email protected]) has joined #adventure
<Fishfosh> So, who's here?
<Moonside> I'm here.
<Fishfosh> getting started at a reasonable time so that we can get through some stuff would be great
<Arkay> flib said he was gonna get pizza but he should be back in a bit
<Arkay> but yeah i'm here
<~flibbyjibbits> spooky scary golems
<Skeleton> I'm here
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<Skeleton> !roll 1 100
<BonBonne> Skeleton rolled 100-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 2
<Fishfosh> Should we wait and see if eltro miraculously appears, or what?
<Moonside> Nah.
<Arkay> let's just go ahead
<Arkay> eltro misses a lot of these things
<Fishfosh> I'd very much like to finish this dungeon
<Arkay> Yeah, we've been stuck here for too long
<~flibbyjibbits> i guess so
<Moonside> So we had just met some bad statues.
<~flibbyjibbits> the room is full of various magical traps as well as the golems that are currently supresssed by the antimagic field that goes down when the axekey is missed
<~flibbyjibbits> moved
<~flibbyjibbits> *
<Fishfosh> "Now what?"
<Moonside> I try attacking the golems while they're frozen.
<~flibbyjibbits> they are metal statues
<~flibbyjibbits> i mean you hit it but
<~flibbyjibbits> probably dont deal too much damage
<Arkay> it's been a while so i can't really remember
<Fishfosh> What kind of formation are the golems in?
<Arkay> can't we just keep the golems suppressed?
<Arkay> i forget what the axekey was for
<Fishfosh> It opens the door to the northern part of the castle
<Fishfosh> where we want to go
<Arkay> Oh, alright
<Skeleton> Back
<Fishfosh> There were golems in the previous rooms too, right?  So just taking the key and running probably wouldn't get us far enough
<Fishfosh> hmm
<Moonside> Where's the axekey right now?
<~flibbyjibbits> while you decide on a strategy im gonna try to figure out how to get away unharmed in the fate rp
<Moonside> dude you can teleport
<~flibbyjibbits> the axekey is on a pedastal in the far side of the room
<~flibbyjibbits> yeah but like
<~flibbyjibbits> 20 feet
<Moonside> Well, I try moving the pedestal with my sword.
<Fishfosh> Does the field go down when the axekey is moved, or is it until it is returned to the pedastal.  Like, if we take it off and drop it on the ground what happens?'
<Moonside> the axekey I mean, what
<~flibbyjibbits> its held on there by some little brackets, i mean like
<~flibbyjibbits> it wont just fall off but if you actually try it can snap right out its like uh
<~flibbyjibbits> damn i cant think of what theyre called
<Moonside> I try doing that, but without using my hands to hold it.
<Moonside> If it's possible.
<~flibbyjibbits> it falls off the platform and falls to the floor
<~flibbyjibbits> for the brief moment that its in the air
<~flibbyjibbits> the golems move and some floor tiles glow menacingly
<~flibbyjibbits> then they stop when it hits the floor
<Fishfosh> Guess my question was answered then
<Fishfosh> "That looks good!  Try dragging it across the floor!"
<Moonside> "So they come to life whenever it moves."
<~flibbyjibbits> your guide/scholar/escort guy is nowhere to be seen during all this
<Fishfosh> fuck him
<Arkay> wow lame
<CommodoreJim> What a douche
<Moonside> I try to drag it along the ground with my sword.
<~flibbyjibbits> when the axe is in motion the golems begin charges
<Skeleton> When the golems stop does the anti-magic thing return
<Skeleton> Or was that just the previous room
<~flibbyjibbits> the antimagic is what stops them midcharge
<Skeleton> Thought so
<Fishfosh> I think throwing it across the room might be the best way to get lots of distance out of a short period of time in motion
<Moonside> Is there anything else that can be moved in these rooms?
<~flibbyjibbits> theres some kobold skeletons
<Skeleton> "Dunno what I like less, statues trying to kill me or feeling like a... something that can't do magic"
<~flibbyjibbits> some of which are stuck around the weapons on the statues
<Fishfosh> Can we move the statues while they are frozen?
<Fishfosh> But yeah if we set up a chain or people we can probably throw it to get a lot of distance quickly
<Fishfosh> chain of*
<Arkay> that sounds like a good plan
<~flibbyjibbits> can you move a 5000 pound statue
<Fishfosh> mmmmnot even with magic
<Arkay> alright so do we want to set up that chain? I'm for it
<Moonside> Sure.
<Moonside> How fast are the statues charging?
<~flibbyjibbits> the biggest problesm with that would be the one right by the axe currently, then the ones by the doors
<~flibbyjibbits> and also the floor traps
<~flibbyjibbits> which are only visible when the field is down
<Fishfosh> I did not recall there being floor traps
<Moonside> Can't we move it a little, then note which tiles have traps in them?
<CommodoreJim> This reminds me of a puzzle
<Fishfosh> But I can't think of a way to do this without those things being a problem
<Moonside> Well, ideally we'd move the axe without moving the axe.
<Arkay> ?
<Skeleton> Contradiction!
<Fishfosh> uh?
<Moonside> We'd have to get the axe from point A to point B without moving it.
<Arkay> so does anyone have control of space/time
<Fishfosh> without magic
<Skeleton> Freddie is total muggle right now, and a shrimpy one
<~flibbyjibbits> keep in mind that there are golems in the room between where you are and the courtyard
<Arkay> so we're boxed in pretty much
<Moonside> Is there a proper solution to this puzzle, flib?
<Moonside> Oh, also there was a hole in one of the back walls, wasn't there?
<~flibbyjibbits> there is a broken down door that leads out of the castle
<~flibbyjibbits> theres a space of maybe 10ish feet before a small clifflike drop
<~flibbyjibbits> that does go around the side
<~flibbyjibbits> i mean like around the whole way of the castle
<Moonside> Hmm.
<Skeleton> "Maybe we totally don't have to deal with this thing and can bail, or find a hole in a wall that takes us where we're going, or heck, MAKE a hole in a wall somewheres else! With magic!"
<Fishfosh> "Do you have a spell of Create Hole in Wall?"
<Skeleton> "Uhhmmm... better chances than I have a kick of create hole in wall"
<Fishfosh> "There must be a solution.  Otherwise they would have just permanently sealed the door without leaving keys."
<Skeleton> "Or this could be where they chucked wizards they don't like to torture them..."
<Fishfosh> Does anyone have a better idea yet?
<Moonside> Nope. All I can think of is sliding it on the ground, maybe putting obstacles of some sort in front of the statues but I doubt that'd do much to stop them.
<Fishfosh> there aren't enough significant things to put in front of them
<Skeleton> Is this like that one puzzle in Resident Evil 1 where you take the shotgun off the rack and have to replace it with a broken one to avoid becoming a Jill Sandwich
<Arkay> i'm stumped
<Fishfosh> if the statues are in mid-charge, then are they still well balanced?
<Fishfosh> Could we push them over?
<~flibbyjibbits> fairly well balanced
<Fishfosh> How quickly do they move?  As fast as we can?
<Skeleton> No way to render them harmless while they're inert, either?
<~flibbyjibbits> the one that is currently RIGHT NEXT TO the axe might be able to be pushed over if you really tried or got lucky
<~flibbyjibbits> they have about the same movement speed as you do
<~flibbyjibbits> but a bit faster since theyre charging right now
<Moonside> Ok I'll make a STR check to push that one.
<Moonside> !roll 1 20+4
<Moonside> oh wait
<Moonside> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> Moonside rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 18
<Skeleton> Yeah, no mods on this one
<Moonside> +4 is 22
<Fishfosh> !roll 1 20 helping
<Fishfosh> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 11
<Fishfosh> no mods here
<Arkay> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> Arkay rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 4
<Arkay> no mods :V
<~flibbyjibbits> using the dc of breaking down a door as a guide here
<CommodoreJim> !roll 1 20
<CommodoreJim> Drom attempts to help
<Skeleton> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> Skeleton rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 13
<CommodoreJim> !roll 1 20
<~flibbyjibbits> add up all your strength scores
<Skeleton> 14 for me
<BonBonne> CommodoreJim rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 20
<Skeleton> DROM SMASH
<CommodoreJim> +4
<Moonside> Mine is 18.
<CommodoreJim> DROM HELPS.
<~flibbyjibbits> ok i guess that the combined efforts you can tip over the closest statue
<Moonside> Yay.
<Skeleton> !calcman 24+14+18+4+11
<~flibbyjibbits> the impact cracks the floor tiles
<BonBonne>  24+14+18+4+11 = 71
<~flibbyjibbits> the axe is momentarily lifted in the air by the impact and the other golems move a bit closer
<Skeleton> "eep.
<Skeleton> "
<Moonside> "How terrible."
<Skeleton> Oh whoops
<Skeleton> I was looking at my DEX mod, my STR mod is -2
<Skeleton> 69!
<Skeleton> *68 :(
<Skeleton> Whatever it happened
<Fishfosh> Now maybe if we kick it across to the door and just avoid golems while it's sliding...
<Moonside> Are they even charging towards us, or towards where we were when Elsa first picked it up?
<CommodoreJim> Maybe we can wish the golems would go away and they will!!
<Fishfosh> This is harder than I thought it would be
<Arkay> yeah I've been totally clueless throughout all of this
<~flibbyjibbits> they charge towards its current location, however they cant change directions  until they get there
<~flibbyjibbits> so i guess theyre going towards where it started until they reach there
<Arkay> can we somehow get them to charge into each other
<Fishfosh> Alright yeah, them throwing/kicking it around sounds like a good idea
<CommodoreJim> Can Raynar seduce them with his body
<Fishfosh> if we zig-zag it
<Fishfosh> We ought to try SOMETHING at least
<Moonside> Let's go with that.
<Arkay> okay zig zag it
<Arkay> any preference on the order of people tossing it
<Moonside> Not really.
<~flibbyjibbits> the ones by the door would be the most dangerous
<Moonside> I'll stay by the door, then.
<Fishfosh> If we can make those ones charge away from the door first, it should work out
<Moonside> Let's just do it.
<Fishfosh> Guess I'll throw first, to someone standing by a wall midway between the door and the pedestal
<CommodoreJim> Strategy!
<Arkay> do we have to make any rolls for throwing things
<Fishfosh> Who wants to be the receiver?
<Arkay> I'll recieve
<Arkay> who's after
<Fishfosh> Oh yeah, what kind of roll if any, flib?
<~flibbyjibbits> hm
<~flibbyjibbits> im not really sure actually let me think a minute
<Fishfosh> We could do it as if throwing a weapon as an attack
<Fishfosh> but just aiming at the ground near the person we're throwing to (which is touch attack AC 5 iirc)
<~flibbyjibbits> yeah maybe best
<~flibbyjibbits> + a basic strength roll because its kind of heavy
<~flibbyjibbits> low dc
<Fishfosh> and I think it's -4 for nonproficiency without throw anything
<Fishfosh> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 4
<Fishfosh> aw shit
<Arkay> um
<Fishfosh> +3 if that's the attack roll, though
<Fishfosh> !roll 1 20
<Fishfosh> strength test
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 6
<Fishfosh> man
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<Skeleton> What if
<~flibbyjibbits> wait are you going for the door into the other room or the door to the outside
<Fishfosh> How low of a dc were we talking, flib?
<Skeleton> We tied a rope to the axe, got behind the golems, tugged on the axe to make them charge futher away, and just kept doing that
<Fishfosh> door to the other room I think
<Fishfosh> throwing it off a cliff is the last thing I want
<Fishfosh> but actually to raynar, by a wall midway to said door
<Fishfosh> To try and draw the door golems away first
<~flibbyjibbits> by low dc i meant like
<~flibbyjibbits> 10  gee
<~flibbyjibbits> pikkup is such a wimp
<Fishfosh> 10 is a 45% chance that's not low omg
<Fishfosh> 45% chance of faiure
<Fishfosh> failure*
<Fishfosh> Well what happens, then?
<~flibbyjibbits> pikkup kind of wimp throws the axe and it makes it like halfway
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 11
<Fishfosh> Pikkup shrugs
<~flibbyjibbits> he gots bonked by a golem
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 12
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 12-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 7
<~flibbyjibbits> 16 damage
<Fishfosh> ow
<Fishfosh> 27 left
<Arkay> okay so what now
<Fishfosh> Did the ones by the door move any further away from it?
<~flibbyjibbits> the one closer turned to face it and took a step or two
<Moonside> I'll take it and throw it as far as I can towards the door.
<Fishfosh> But that's not the plan!
<Moonside> Well, your plan clearly hasn't worked out very well.
<Fishfosh> We want to lure the ones by the door away first, THEN throw it there
<Moonside> Ok, then I throw it towards where Pikkup would've thrown it.
<Moonside> It's an attack roll and a STR roll, yes?
<~flibbyjibbits> yes
<Moonside> !roll 1 20
<~flibbyjibbits> i kind of liked the rope idea
<BonBonne> Moonside rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 17
<Fishfosh> I didn't get how the rope idea was supposed to work
<Moonside> BAB is +7. -4 I guess?
<Skeleton> like, lightly pull it from behind the golems (the opposite way we want it to go) to make them move, decide to turn around and charge back. Then repeat, but pull harder the other way because that's the way we want the axe to be going?
<Skeleton> Or would the floor traps not let that happen
<Fishfosh> it's a touch attack against AC 5, don't worry about that
<Moonside> !roll 1 20
<Fishfosh> to hit the floor, that is
<BonBonne> Moonside rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 5
<Moonside> lol str
<Moonside> +4
<Fishfosh> Heh, you failed it too
<~flibbyjibbits> the floor traps are more like "you step on them and get flamed on"
<Skeleton> http://gyazo.com/501b7756144e91011763d372f36d988a
<Skeleton> Err wrong place
<~flibbyjibbits> elsa  i guess got a bad toss. lets say she was in a huryr to hot potato it away so as to not get hit by the golems
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 16
<~flibbyjibbits> it stopped just very very short of hitting her
<Fishfosh> Yeah, I guess the rope idea is a less risky version of what we're already doing...
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 18
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 5
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 5-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 4
<Moonside> so many GM rolls. mysterious
<CommodoreJim> Terribly mysterious.
<~flibbyjibbits> however freddie was standing on one of the traps at the moment
<~flibbyjibbits> reflex
<Moonside> haha
<Fishfosh> And since this is not going very well, maybe we should try it
<Skeleton> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> Skeleton rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 5
<Skeleton> +3
<CommodoreJim> omg fraddi
<Skeleton> Does it spring out of the floor and send me flying with a "SPROIYOIYOING" noise
<CommodoreJim> it's just a pair of kobolds
<CommodoreJim> that gently begin to carress you
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 2 6
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 6-sided die number 1 of 2: Result 4
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 6-sided die number 2 of 2: Result 4
<~flibbyjibbits> little runes on the floor tile spew out some magic fire on him
<Skeleton> "Ahhh! Hothot!"
<Fishfosh> "Maybe this isn't working.  We need something safer."
<CommodoreJim> "Agreed."
<Skeleton> Freddie explains the rope idea
<Skeleton> (also how much damage? 8?)
<~flibbyjibbits> yes
<Fishfosh> Alright, anyone want to volunteer to tie/pull the rope?
<CommodoreJim> Drom volunteers
<Arkay> drom can pull stuff faster than most of us probably
<Skeleton> "Great, yes, I will hide somewhere safe from big rock mans and fire, you do the heavy lifting"
<CommodoreJim> Alright so what do I need to do
<Moonside> does anyone actually have rope
<Skeleton> ...
<CommodoreJim> y'know
<Moonside> I'm just making sure.
<Fishfosh> ...no
<CommodoreJim> I do carry rope yes
<CommodoreJim> Have since day one
<Fishfosh> Yes, good
<Fishfosh> excellent
<Arkay> thank god
<Moonside> I think it's an escape artist check to tie a rope?
<~flibbyjibbits> yes it is
<CommodoreJim> Maybe someone not Drom should tie it
<~flibbyjibbits> to avoid the danger of the axe being moving while tieing the rope
<Moonside> Let's get the Rogue to do it. Oh wait
<~flibbyjibbits> probably do it like noose style or slipnot or whatever
<CommodoreJim> Meanwhile back at Lotte's place
<~flibbyjibbits> like pretie it so a quick tug will tighten it over the haft
<Fishfosh> Can I tie the rope without moving the axe as a charisma-based check instead?
<Moonside> Lotte sneezes randomly. She thinks that it's probably nothing, and goes back to sleep.
<CommodoreJim> Haha
<Skeleton> Heh
<Fishfosh> Well, I guess nobody has escape artist ranks then?
<Moonside> Nope.
<CommodoreJim> I definitely don't
<~flibbyjibbits> a simple knot can be an untrained check
<~flibbyjibbits> i mean really now
<Fishfosh> Then I guess highest dex mod?
<~flibbyjibbits> who cant tie a basic slippy knot
<Fishfosh> Yeah, but we've been failing some supposedly "low dc" checks here
<~flibbyjibbits> yeah
<Fishfosh> Wait, can't we just take 10 for this?
<Fishfosh> that should work for a simple knot
<~flibbyjibbits> yeah its not that complicated
<Moonside> Yay.
<Fishfosh> Alright Drom, get to it!
<CommodoreJim> Okay what do I do
<CommodoreJim> So we're tricking them basically
<CommodoreJim> over and over
<Fishfosh> Yup
<CommodoreJim> Alright specific rolls I should be makin'?
<Fishfosh> I don't think a roll should be necessary to drag an object, right?
<Fishfosh> unless it's heavy enough for another basic str check
<Moonside> This reminds me of that game where people had to make rolls for everything. Like going down the stairs required acrobatics checks
<~flibbyjibbits> it weighs about the same as a normal greataxe, a bit more
<Fishfosh> then no
<Fishfosh> right?
<~flibbyjibbits> but not a problem for drom since he normally uses one
<~flibbyjibbits> lets roll anyways
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 10
<~flibbyjibbits> all fine
<CommodoreJim> Okay. Drom gets to dragging!
<CommodoreJim> Initiate Plan Trollin' Golems
<Fishfosh> Hooray for poor AI!
<Skeleton> The idea would be to pull as lightly as can be done just to get them to move in one direction, then GO GO GO GO the other
<Skeleton> Like the frog climbing out of a well and sliding back down math problem
<CommodoreJim> Drom enacts Freddie's brilliant strategy. Let's see how this turns out
<~flibbyjibbits> it sounds like  a neat enough solution to the problem that it sould work just fine
<Skeleton> So, if it's just a question of how far, don't really need to roll for every other one, you know what I mean.
<Skeleton> Yay I am master of puzzle solving
<~flibbyjibbits> dont need to roll since its a good idea that isnt hard to do in any way
<Moonside> Do we win at Pathfinder?
<Eltrotraw> okay
<Skeleton> We get all the achievements
<~flibbyjibbits> you .... found the path
<Eltrotraw> sorry but can i ask for a synopsis since the last time i participated
<Moonside> ok so
<Eltrotraw> last i remember we were on a delivery to plant the ring of bomb
<Moonside> the king died
<Eltrotraw> are we still doing that
<Fishfosh> Yeah kinda
<Fishfosh> We're at the old castle
<Eltrotraw> oh okay
<CommodoreJim> We just solved a Layton puzzle
<~flibbyjibbits> just gotta pick up these old stone axes and put them in statue hands to open doors
<Fishfosh> Some archaeologists agreed to let us in if we helped this useless halfling find a few artifacts
<Eltrotraw> right, I remember that
<Skeleton> He is quite useless.
<Fishfosh> and then what flib said
<Fishfosh> So we fought a skeletal dragons to get the first axe
<Fishfosh> And the second was guarded by golems that moved whenever the axe did
<CommodoreJim> Maybe we should exile the halfing into the ocean
<Fishfosh> If I were evil, I'd throw him off the cliff outside
<Fishfosh> but I am good
<Fishfosh> so he lives
<Eltrotraw> why are we keeping this halfling alive /evilthought
<Fishfosh> our agreement
<Fishfosh> Anyway, I guess we got the second ax safely now?
<Skeleton> He's like those EarthBound characters who join you and don't do anything useful in fights and can't be targetted by monsters
<~flibbyjibbits> yeah sure why not
<Moonside> Congrats to whoever came up with this idea (Skelly?)
<Skeleton> "Yeh! High fives!"
<Fishfosh> Skeleton, yes
<Moonside> "That was a good idea, Freddie."
<Fishfosh> "Good plan!  Beat the crap outta mine."
<Moonside> 18 INT yes
<Skeleton> Freddie is like :>
<CommodoreJim> "Indeed!" Drom gives Freddie a way-too-hearty pat on the back "You really pulled us through, there."
<CommodoreJim> hardy
<Skeleton> "Ow"
<CommodoreJim> whatever
<Skeleton> I think hearty works
<CommodoreJim> idk what even r words
<Skeleton> if u say it and i no wat u meen then the communication is suxesful so words can be watever u say they are
<Fishfosh> hearty works just fine
<Skeleton> thats how langwaj wuz born
<Fishfosh> hardy means "capable of enduring fatigue, hardship, exposure, etc."
<CommodoreJim> right
<CommodoreJim> jus' one of those issues I have, like horde vs. hoard
<Fishfosh> Anyway, let's get this here ax to that there statue and open yonder door
<Skeleton> horde is the mob, hoard is the loot
<Fishfosh> We only needed the two axes, right?
<~flibbyjibbits> the two gargoyles above the door look down menacingly as you go to put the axe there
<Moonside> You wouldn't like portuguese very much, Jim
<~flibbyjibbits> the horde guards the hoard
<Moonside> I use Detect Evil on the gargoyles.
<~flibbyjibbits> nothing
<Arkay> yay
<CommodoreJim> is there a gazebo around
<~flibbyjibbits> yes
<Moonside> I use my Mystic Eyes of Detect Evil on the dread gazebo.
<~flibbyjibbits> the gazebo is dead after centuries without any gullible prey
<Fishfosh> Well, whatever gargoyles
<Fishfosh> YOU'RE NOT THE BOSS OF US, GARGOYLES
<Fishfosh> YOU'RE NOT MY MOTHER
<CommodoreJim> http://i.imgur.com/AscqW62.gif i do this to the gargoyles
<~flibbyjibbits> did you put the axe in the hands yet
<Fishfosh> Yeah sure
<~flibbyjibbits> ok then yeah they totally animate and swoop down to attack
<Fishfosh> where does drom find a skateboard?
<CommodoreJim> he INVENTS IT
<CommodoreJim> omg shit
<Arkay> omg
<CommodoreJim> "I am quite tired of traps, I'm going to be honest."
<Moonside> "Aren't we all?"
<Moonside> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> Moonside rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 5
<Skeleton> "Aah!"
<Skeleton> !roll 1 20
<Fishfosh> "yup."
<Moonside> +4 init
<BonBonne> Skeleton rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 9
<Fishfosh> !roll 1 20
<Fishfosh> +3 init
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 19
<Skeleton> +1
<Arkay> !roll 1 20
<CommodoreJim> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> Arkay rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 13
<BonBonne> CommodoreJim rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 3
<CommodoreJim> :u
<CommodoreJim> :u
<CommodoreJim> :U
<Arkay> total of 15
<Fishfosh> Oh yeah, there's no anti-magic field out here
<Fishfosh> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 2
<Fishfosh> +8 init for ekans
<CommodoreJim> so i have six
<CommodoreJim> 3 +3
<Fishfosh> so 22 for pikkup 10 for ekans
<Skeleton> Elsa 9, Freddie 10, Raynar 15, Drom 6
<Eltrotraw> !roll 1 20 +7 ?
<Eltrotraw> whoops i broke it
<Eltrotraw> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> Eltrotraw rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 13
<~flibbyjibbits> no mods
<Eltrotraw> okay switching to fone
<~flibbyjibbits> since the king apparently programmed his golems to be honorable and not suprise attack
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 2 20
<~flibbyjibbits> +2 oneach
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 2 20
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 16
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 20
<Fishfosh> dayyyum
<~flibbyjibbits> so the orger is then
<~flibbyjibbits> order
<~flibbyjibbits> gargoyle1 tombs gargoyle 2  rayner freddie elsa drom?
<~flibbyjibbits> oh missed pikup and ekans
* flibbyjibbits changes topic to 'gg1 pikkup tombs gg2 raynar ekans freddie elsa drom'
<~flibbyjibbits> did i do that right
<Fishfosh> think so
<Fishfosh> tombs suddenly awakens from his hangover
<Eltrotraw> sure
<Fishfosh> ggwp
<~flibbyjibbits> i guess drom placed the axe so itll attack him
<~flibbyjibbits> for a minute i forgot i was first >_>
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 20
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 20
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 20
<~flibbyjibbits> .. is it the space after the 20 thats messing it up?
<Skeleton> Bon wake up
<Skeleton> Oh
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 3 20
<Skeleton> Maybe.
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 3: Result 3
<~flibbyjibbits> it was
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 2 of 3: Result 4
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 3 of 3: Result 12
<~flibbyjibbits> god damn fuck gargoyle
<~flibbyjibbits> do any of those hit at +18
<~flibbyjibbits> since it aircharged
<~flibbyjibbits> actually itd seem they all did
<~flibbyjibbits> well then
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 8
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 2 6
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 8-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 5
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 6-sided die number 1 of 2: Result 3
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 6-sided die number 2 of 2: Result 6
<~flibbyjibbits> +6 on all of them is
<~flibbyjibbits> dammit i do calculus not addition
<Fishfosh> do the derivative of the damage instead (0)
<~flibbyjibbits> integrate the damage as 5x+3x+6x+18x+c
<~flibbyjibbits> 32
<Fishfosh> wow
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 5
<~flibbyjibbits> the free grapple attack it gets for hitting both claws misses
<Eltrotraw> nerf pls
<Fishfosh> Well, my spells are all ineffective here.  Pikkup will mage armor himself.
<Fishfosh> tombs go
<Fishfosh> shoot them with your gun
<Skeleton> VAMP! GO!
* Eltrotraw ([email protected]) Quit (Ping timeout)
<Skeleton> He sure went all right!
* Eltriuqs ([email protected]) has joined #adventure
<Eltriuqs> I thought I joined this sorry
<Eltriuqs> was it already my turn
<~flibbyjibbits> yes
<Skeleton> Yup
<Eltriuqs> let's attack gargoyle 1 - double shots
<Eltriuqs> !roll 2 20
<~flibbyjibbits> tombs got brutalized for 32 damage first thing
<BonBonne> Eltriuqs rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 2: Result 15
<BonBonne> Eltriuqs rolled 20-sided die number 2 of 2: Result 4
<Eltriuqs> +13 mod on both shots wasn't it I forget
<Eltriuqs> oh ok
<~flibbyjibbits> tough ac is 11
<~flibbyjibbits> touch*
<Eltriuqs> I'm still alive I think
<~flibbyjibbits> you got 68 hp
<Eltriuqs> so let's roll damages
<Eltriuqs> !roll 2 8
<~flibbyjibbits> so 34 hp
<BonBonne> Eltriuqs rolled 8-sided die number 1 of 2: Result 5
<BonBonne> Eltriuqs rolled 8-sided die number 2 of 2: Result 5
<Eltriuqs> 22 dmg
<~flibbyjibbits> the gargoyle is shot by the guns
<CommodoreJim> pew pew
<Skeleton> 10/10 description
<Moonside> good game 2's turn
<~flibbyjibbits> oh dma right it is
<~flibbyjibbits> well elsa put the first axe in place originally, i believe
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 3 20
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 3: Result 20
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 2 of 3: Result 8
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 3 of 3: Result 3
<Fishfosh> oh my
<Fishfosh> dat natural 20
<Skeleton> I think Bon's a keeper for dice rollin
<BonBonne> babbu
<~flibbyjibbits> gee elsa has a lot less ac than id expect from a heavy class
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 2 8
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 2 6
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 8-sided die number 1 of 2: Result 7
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 8-sided die number 2 of 2: Result 4
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 6-sided die number 1 of 2: Result 2
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 6-sided die number 2 of 2: Result 4
<~flibbyjibbits> 41?
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 8
<~flibbyjibbits> actually no i dont feel like remembering how grapples work and you'll have a hard enough time as is
<Moonside> ok
<Moonside> So 41 then, yeah?
<~flibbyjibbits> yes
<Moonside> 22/63
<Skeleton> Also kicks your armor off leaving you only in your underwear
<~flibbyjibbits> gee these gargoyles are really angry about stuff
<CommodoreJim> o-oh mai
<Arkay> okay gonna channel
<~flibbyjibbits> wonder if fighting them is strictly nessesary
<Arkay> !roll 3 6
<BonBonne> Arkay rolled 6-sided die number 1 of 3: Result 6
<BonBonne> Arkay rolled 6-sided die number 2 of 3: Result 1
<BonBonne> Arkay rolled 6-sided die number 3 of 3: Result 3
<Fishfosh> Is the halfling missing again?
<~flibbyjibbits> yes
<Skeleton> Sacrifice the halfling!
<Skeleton> Dammit.
<Arkay> 10hp to whoever was damaged
<Moonside> That's me.
<Arkay> and I think Drom maybe and I forgot to heal fish after he was hit by a golem
<Moonside> We can just say that you did that retroactively.
<~flibbyjibbits> yes
<Fishfosh> Well, that mostly covers it anyway
<Fishfosh> Ekans will go for ggwp1
<Fishfosh> !roll 4 20
<Fishfosh> smoke weed
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 4: Result 2
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 2 of 4: Result 14
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 3 of 4: Result 19
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 4 of 4: Result 13
<Fishfosh> What's the ac?
<~flibbyjibbits> 22
<Fishfosh> one wing attack hits
<Fishfosh> !roll 1 4
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 4-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 3
<CommodoreJim> k cool
<Fishfosh> 4 damage from that
<Fishfosh> !roll 1 6
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 6-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 2
<Fishfosh> and 2 more from energy attacks if not immune to acid
<~flibbyjibbits> lets say its extra vulnerable to acid
<~flibbyjibbits> takes double
<Fishfosh> obby
<~flibbyjibbits> 6 whole damage
<Fishfosh> a whopping 7
<~flibbyjibbits> o
<Fishfosh> wait, 8
<Fishfosh> 4 from wings, 4 from acid
<Fishfosh> whoa mindblowing amounts of damage
<Fishfosh> freddie goes
<Eltriuqs> doesn't arks heal mean I have 46/68 health now
<Fishfosh> yeah
<Skeleton> Freddie is gonna use Shocking Image
<Fishfosh> I am shocked
<Skeleton> You should be
<Skeleton> !roll 1 4
<BonBonne> Skeleton rolled 4-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 3
<Skeleton> And being level 7, one additional one per three levels, so five clones
<~flibbyjibbits> neat
<Fishfosh> What do they do?
<~flibbyjibbits> way to be storm spirit
<~flibbyjibbits> shocking image is storm spirits q isnt it
<Skeleton> If I'm targetted, it'll hit me or a clone at random and they deal electric damage and be removed if hit
<Fishfosh> yeah, that's storm spirit's q
<Skeleton> Or if missed by 5 or less, they're destroyed.
<~flibbyjibbits> its telmars favorite spell
<Skeleton> "Which one's the real me? Do you idiots know?"
<~flibbyjibbits> oh god i opened the seasoning packet for my macaroni and it was statik charged and went everywhere
<Arkay> "Oh no, more Freddies"
<Moonside> Oh, it's my turn. Sorry. I'll use Lay on Hands on myself.
<Moonside> !roll 3 6
<BonBonne> Moonside rolled 6-sided die number 1 of 3: Result 1
<BonBonne> Moonside rolled 6-sided die number 2 of 3: Result 2
<BonBonne> Moonside rolled 6-sided die number 3 of 3: Result 5
<Moonside> bon pls
<BonBonne> babbu...
<Moonside> Well, how far am I from 1?
<Moonside> (lay on hands is a swift action when used on self)
<~flibbyjibbits> well theyre large size so pretty big i guess you can hit it
<Arkay> is our paly feeling herself up
<Moonside> Alright then. Let's go power attack and all those things etc.
<Moonside> !roll 2 20
<BonBonne> Moonside rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 2: Result 7
<BonBonne> Moonside rolled 20-sided die number 2 of 2: Result 16
<Moonside> +13 to first, +6 to second
<Moonside> Second hits?
<~flibbyjibbits> 22 ac
<~flibbyjibbits> yes
<Moonside> !roll 1 8
<BonBonne> Moonside rolled 8-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 8
<Moonside> +12 damage
<~flibbyjibbits> so then drominus turn
<CommodoreJim> Mmk
<CommodoreJim> Which Goyle has less health
<Skeleton> I think 1's the only one that's been attacked
<CommodoreJim> Okay then
<CommodoreJim> I will attempt to hit
<CommodoreJim> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> CommodoreJim rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 15
<CommodoreJim> +11
<~flibbyjibbits> yeah that work
<CommodoreJim> !roll 1 12
<BonBonne> CommodoreJim rolled 12-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 3
<CommodoreJim> +6
<CommodoreJim> :(
<Eltriuqs> wowie
<Fishfosh> gg
<Skeleton> You need to get some kind of cool magic axe that does awesome shit
<Skeleton> Like fires axe-beams or something
<~flibbyjibbits> wait a minute i messed up earlier, the first gargoyle hit drom not tombs
<~flibbyjibbits> why was i saying it hit tombs
<Moonside> Didn't Drom get a magic axe already?
<~flibbyjibbits> i went "its gonna hit drom" and then afterwards said tombs whyd i do that
<CommodoreJim> It's a defensively magic axe
<CommodoreJim> I can't drop it and it makes me diehard and gives me +2 on one save per day
<Eltriuqs> you should borrow dario chopman's axe
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 5
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 5-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 5
<~flibbyjibbits> oh no freddie
<Fishfosh> For this campaign, we need a +2 ax of dunking
<Skeleton> Axe Cop's axe
<~flibbyjibbits> wait
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 7
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 7-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 3
<~flibbyjibbits> ok actually tombs this time
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 3 20
<Eltriuqs> ignores all damage reduction once a day (refreshes on killing blow) and causes targets hit to bleed
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 3: Result 1
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 2 of 3: Result 15
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 3 of 3: Result 3
<Skeleton> oh no me? Me means you have to roll again to see if it hits me or one of my loki clones
<~flibbyjibbits> it dives for tombs and misses and falls on its ass and doesnt hit anything
<Skeleton> This is how I will never die
<Eltriuqs> is that because of the first 1
<~flibbyjibbits> i rolled the wrong amount when id said it would hit fredie
<~flibbyjibbits> and yes
<~flibbyjibbits> pikkup tern
<Fishfosh> while dario's axe is equipped, you gain whirlwind attack as a free bonus feat regardless of meeting the prerequisites
<Fishfosh> and okay
<Fishfosh> shoot goyle1 with crossbow pewpew
<Fishfosh> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 4
<Fishfosh> +7 lol
<Fishfosh> hide behind ekans end turn
<Fishfosh> crypts
<Fishfosh> mausoleums the shooter
<Eltriuqs> !roll 2 20
<Eltriuqs> bang bang
<Eltriuqs> "I'm gonna kill you dead, assholes"
<~flibbyjibbits> cant have a space after the second number
<CommodoreJim> got to kill fast and bullets...just right actually
<Fishfosh> !roll 2 20
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 2: Result 20
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 2 of 2: Result 4
<Fishfosh> bang bang
<~flibbyjibbits> both hit because guns are way op and brb i gotta go handle something
<Moonside> No reloading?
<Fishfosh> eltro?
<~flibbyjibbits> kback
<~flibbyjibbits> eltro is dead how much damage does he do uh
<Fishfosh> d8 + a fuckton I think?
<~flibbyjibbits> he rolled 2 5s and got 22 so
<~flibbyjibbits> thatd 1d8+6?
<~flibbyjibbits> and 3 hits so
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 3 8
<Fishfosh> guess so
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 8-sided die number 1 of 3: Result 1
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 8-sided die number 2 of 3: Result 3
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 8-sided die number 3 of 3: Result 3
<~flibbyjibbits> nice work
<Fishfosh> wasted crit
<~flibbyjibbits> 7+18 is 25
<~flibbyjibbits> lets round up and say it dies
<Fishfosh> yay
<Moonside> Yay.
<Arkay> whoo
<~flibbyjibbits> gg2 hates gun man but he isnt here so
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 6
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 6-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 4
<~flibbyjibbits> actually itd make sense for it to just hit drom
<~flibbyjibbits> since he put the axe in
<CommodoreJim> Damnt
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 3 20
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 3: Result 6
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 2 of 3: Result 15
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 3 of 3: Result 11
<~flibbyjibbits> all at +16 so
<CommodoreJim> Yeah. All hit.
<~flibbyjibbits> it claw,claw,bites drom
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 8
<Fishfosh> ridiculous bonuses
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 6
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 6
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 8-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 2
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 6-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 3
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 6-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 5
<Fishfosh> How does it even get +16?
<~flibbyjibbits> so 28 damage
<Skeleton> I'd forgotten how long these rounds do take... suddenly I feel less like pmdnd is way too clunky
<~flibbyjibbits> 11 hit dice and 22 strength
<CommodoreJim> Drom is very hurt right now
<CommodoreJim> Like, leaning on his axe and sputtering
<Fishfosh> raynar better do a thing
<Fishfosh> a good thing
<Arkay> oh okay
<Arkay> I make my way over to Drom and caste cure moderate wounds
<Arkay> !roll 2 8
<BonBonne> Arkay rolled 8-sided die number 1 of 2: Result 3
<BonBonne> Arkay rolled 8-sided die number 2 of 2: Result 8
<Arkay> 11+7 (my level)
<Arkay> so 18 points of damage healed
<Arkay> "Here you go, big guy."
<CommodoreJim> "Nngh...Thank you. Much appreciated."
<Fishfosh> How far apart are these gargoyles?
<Fishfosh> or is it just a clusterfuck melee
<Moonside> One of them died.
<Fishfosh> yes
<Fishfosh> but I want to know if ekans can still full attack the other one
<~flibbyjibbits> clusterfuck
<Moonside> I guess so. Elsa was attacked by 2 but she could still hit 1.
<Fishfosh> Going with that, then
<Fishfosh> !roll 4 20
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 4: Result 10
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 2 of 4: Result 6
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 3 of 4: Result 13
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 4 of 4: Result 10
<Fishfosh> ZIP
<Fishfosh> freddie go
<Skeleton> Freddie makes his clones and himself talk amongst each other for the lulz. "What do you think we should do, Freddie?" "I dunno, Freddie. Why not Lightningbolt? That always works!" "Screw that, freddie. It's all about Burning Hands." "Ah! We haven't used Burning Hands in a while." "Burning hands it is! Hoo hah!"
<Skeleton> All: "Gargoyle Ignizzle! Burning Hands!" to gg1
<Fishfosh> gg1 died
<Skeleton> Oh did it
<~flibbyjibbits> i assume you mean gg2
<CommodoreJim> lolnoob
<Moonside> "You're so silly, Freddie. Wait, I'm Freddie!"
<Skeleton> Sure yeah.
<Fishfosh> gg
<Fishfosh> gg
<CommodoreJim> freddie gropes the empty air with his flaming hands
<Skeleton> Oh yeah that does damage doesn't it
<Skeleton> !roll 5 4
<BonBonne> Skeleton rolled 4-sided die number 1 of 5: Result 2
<BonBonne> Skeleton rolled 4-sided die number 2 of 5: Result 4
<BonBonne> Skeleton rolled 4-sided die number 3 of 5: Result 3
<BonBonne> Skeleton rolled 4-sided die number 4 of 5: Result 3
<BonBonne> Skeleton rolled 4-sided die number 5 of 5: Result 1
<Skeleton> 12
<CommodoreJim> nerf magic
<Skeleton> Although it didn't occur to me maybe it's a statue gargoyle who wouldn't even be bothered by fire. I think of monster demon gargoyles first
<~flibbyjibbits> they only have dr vs physical damage, which i wasnt applying this fight to get it over with quicker
<CommodoreJim> even if it is freddie wouldn't think of that
<CommodoreJim> remember the scorpions
<Skeleton> "Nice work Freddie!" "Hey, you're quite welcome Freddie."
<Fishfosh> They're threatening enough without DR, geeze
<Fishfosh> +16 attacks.  ridonkulous.
<~flibbyjibbits> well they are a boss fight
<Fishfosh> true enough
<Fishfosh> They could probably reduce pikkup from full to the negatives without even critting
<~flibbyjibbits> lets find out
<~flibbyjibbits> elsas turn anyw3ays
<Skeleton> That's why I put up five more Freddies mang
<CommodoreJim> i hope they have monsters in heaveeeeeeeeeeeeeeen
<Fishfosh> But pikkup can't do that
<Moonside> I guess I can full attack 2, yeah?
<~flibbyjibbits> sure
<Moonside> !roll 2 20
<Fishfosh> Oh well, with mage armor up and Shield Ally from Ekans I think Pikkup has the highest AC here
<BonBonne> Moonside rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 2: Result 7
<BonBonne> Moonside rolled 20-sided die number 2 of 2: Result 19
<Fishfosh> close, at least
<Moonside> First doesn't hit, second does, so
<Moonside> !roll 1 8
<BonBonne> Moonside rolled 8-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 2
<Moonside> 14 damage.
<Fishfosh> drommmmmmmm
<CommodoreJim> oh right sorry
<CommodoreJim> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> CommodoreJim rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 18
<CommodoreJim> just gonna keep trying to hit these things with my big axe. +11, by the way
<~flibbyjibbits> ac 22
<CommodoreJim> !roll 1 12
<BonBonne> CommodoreJim rolled 12-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 1
<CommodoreJim> +6
<CommodoreJim> GOD. DAMN.
<Moonside> lol
<CommodoreJim> Drom is still feeling woozy from all the BLOOD LOSS
<Moonside> drom hits himself in the face
<Moonside> he doesn't take damage but it's funny and the audience laughs
<CommodoreJim> drom dies of shame
<~flibbyjibbits> aaaaaaa i accidentally inhaled some of the sacycilic acid powder
<CommodoreJim> /quit adventure RIP
<Skeleton> "Hey Drom, remind us later to repair your armor." "Yeah, we'll make it like new again!" "And six times as fast!"
<Fishfosh> oshit, flib
<Fishfosh> How bad is that?
<Moonside> Oh damn flib.
<CommodoreJim> wuhoh
<Skeleton> Aspirin?
<Eltriuqs> oh I'm ded
<~flibbyjibbits> sacyclic acid is used to treat skin diseases so i assume it isnt really bad for me
<~flibbyjibbits> its just
<~flibbyjibbits> not something comfortable to have in your nose
<~flibbyjibbits> its like citrus on cuts
<~flibbyjibbits> but in the form of a powder in the nose
<Fishfosh> ic
<Moonside> That's terrible.
<Fishfosh> ouch
<~flibbyjibbits> i think its pikups turn
<Fishfosh> oh yeah, it is huh
<Fishfosh> my bad
<Fishfosh> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 20
<Fishfosh> pew crossbow
<Fishfosh> oh boy
<~flibbyjibbits> dam
<~flibbyjibbits> roll crit confirm
<Fishfosh> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 2
<Fishfosh> nnnnnnope
<~flibbyjibbits> yeah i didnt think so
<~flibbyjibbits> well it still hit
<Fishfosh> !roll 1 8
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 8-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 8
<Fishfosh> 8!
<Fishfosh> Pikkupstix did more damage than drom!
<Fishfosh> is eltro undead now or what?
<~flibbyjibbits> i guesss so
<~flibbyjibbits> judging by him being on his phone i assume hes got other stuff to do
<~flibbyjibbits> brb moving laundry
<~flibbyjibbits> okback
<~flibbyjibbits> tombs is reloading
<~flibbyjibbits> gg2 will uh
<~flibbyjibbits> i guess itll hit raynar
<~flibbyjibbits> since hes all kinda glowy and stuff and rakor taught it to hate magic
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 3 20
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 3: Result 5
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 2 of 3: Result 4
<~flibbyjibbits> claw claw bite
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 3 of 3: Result 11
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 3 of 3: Result 11
<~flibbyjibbits> ok
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 8
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 6
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 8-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 5
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 6
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 6-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 4
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 6-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 3
<~flibbyjibbits> 30 damage
<~flibbyjibbits> it brutalizes him
<Arkay> omg\
<Arkay> well since he's liekly not gonna move again I'll just crossbow him
<Arkay> do the healing after battle
<Arkay> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> Arkay rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 7
<Arkay> plus 5
<Arkay> um
<Fishfosh> haha
<Fishfosh>  no
<Fishfosh> !roll 4 20
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 4: Result 1
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 2 of 4: Result 11
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 3 of 4: Result 12
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 4 of 4: Result 10
<Fishfosh> Rolling lots of dice isn't great when none of them do anything
<Fishfosh> freddie go
<Skeleton> "Your call, Freddie." "Again? But you chose last time too!" "Ha!" "Ha!" "Cut it out and shoot him with some more fire." "I was thinking the same thing."
<Skeleton> Burning hands again
<Skeleton> !roll 5 4
<BonBonne> Skeleton rolled 4-sided die number 1 of 5: Result 3
<BonBonne> Skeleton rolled 4-sided die number 2 of 5: Result 3
<BonBonne> Skeleton rolled 4-sided die number 3 of 5: Result 1
<BonBonne> Skeleton rolled 4-sided die number 4 of 5: Result 2
<BonBonne> Skeleton rolled 4-sided die number 5 of 5: Result 2
<Skeleton> 11
<Fishfosh> elsa's turn
<Moonside> I'll full attack it again I guess.
<Moonside> !roll 2 20
<BonBonne> Moonside rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 2: Result 18
<BonBonne> Moonside rolled 20-sided die number 2 of 2: Result 18
<Moonside> aw yeah
<Moonside> !roll 2 8
<BonBonne> Moonside rolled 8-sided die number 1 of 2: Result 7
<BonBonne> Moonside rolled 8-sided die number 2 of 2: Result 4
<Moonside> Sooo 19, 16.
<Fishfosh> smote
<CommodoreJim> drom smash????
<Fishfosh> yes please
<CommodoreJim> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> CommodoreJim rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 5
<CommodoreJim> Whiffs because Drom has blood in his eyes
<~flibbyjibbits> how are you getting +12 on hits
<Fishfosh> +4 strength, x1.5 for 2 handed weapon, power attack, and maybe weapon specialization or magic sword bonus?
<~flibbyjibbits> lets keep going otherwise but i still cant figure that out
<Fishfosh> sheet says it's a +1 sword, so I think I'm right
<Moonside> Magic sword bonus yeah
<Fishfosh> Anyway, Pikkupsticks sees all that burning hands action and decides to add in an Acid Splash
<Fishfosh> !roll 1 20
<Fishfosh> ranged touch +7
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 14
<~flibbyjibbits> touch ac 11
<Fishfosh> !roll 1 3
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 3-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 2
<Fishfosh> "Acid Splash!"
<~flibbyjibbits> so 4
<Fishfosh> 4!
<Fishfosh> I figured it was about as much damage as my crossbow would normally do, but more reliable to hit with
<Fishfosh> tombs??? or gg2 or something
<~flibbyjibbits> right sorry i was looking up some stuff
<~flibbyjibbits> tombs is relaoding again since he didnt before
<~flibbyjibbits> gg2 will hit else i gess since she does the most damage
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 3 20
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 3: Result 11
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 2 of 3: Result 20
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 3 of 3: Result 6
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 17
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 8
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 6
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 6
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 8-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 8
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 6-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 4
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 6
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 6-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 6
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 6-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 3
<Fishfosh> who is all this at?
<~flibbyjibbits> that was at elsa since she did the most damage
<~flibbyjibbits> if my math is right thats uh
<~flibbyjibbits> 45ish
<Moonside> That's pretty terrible and puts her at -5.
<Moonside> I guess I should've Layed on Hands again.
<Fishfosh> its k, raynar is up
<Moonside> "Guh...!" was all that Elsa said, and even then it probably wasn't hearable, before passing out. she doesn't speak a lot while fighting.
<Arkay> oh it's still not dead
<Fishfosh> not yet
<Arkay> I can't remember the last time I ever hit anything
<Arkay> so I'll just channel
<Arkay> !roll 3 6
<BonBonne> Arkay rolled 6-sided die number 1 of 3: Result 5
<BonBonne> Arkay rolled 6-sided die number 2 of 3: Result 3
<BonBonne> Arkay rolled 6-sided die number 3 of 3: Result 1
<Arkay> a whopping 9 hp for everyone
<Fishfosh> more like change the channel
<Fishfosh> 'cuz thats boring
<Arkay> omg
<Moonside> She's at 4 HP. "Ah... much appreciated."
<Fishfosh> !roll 4 20
<Fishfosh> smoke weed every day
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 4: Result 9
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 2 of 4: Result 11
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 3 of 4: Result 5
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 20-sided die number 4 of 4: Result 18
<Fishfosh> THAT LAST ONE BARELY HITS
<~flibbyjibbits> nice work
<Fishfosh> !roll 1 4
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 4-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 1
<Fishfosh> !roll 1 6
<BonBonne> Fishfosh rolled 6-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 5
<Fishfosh> 12
<~flibbyjibbits> good enough
<~flibbyjibbits> as the second gargoyle's animating magic fades the door to the throne room slams open
<Fishfosh> Ekans sorta clips it with his wingtip and acid shoots out
<Fishfosh> "We win!"
<Moonside> "It seems that way."
<Arkay> "Well, whoopee."
<CommodoreJim> "Finally..."
<Skeleton> "Yeah!" "Yeah!" "Yeah!" "Yeah!" "Yeah!" "Yeah!"
<Arkay> what're the chances that we'll run into another fight
<~flibbyjibbits> well theres still the mystery box
<Skeleton> Freddie's clones go bzztbzzt and vanish after a minute. "I enjoyed my company, too bad you didn't really get to see what they do..."
<~flibbyjibbits> which is now very hot and almost glowing
<Moonside> mystery box wha
<CommodoreJim> BOMB RING.
<Moonside> I use Detect Evil in the box, just in case.
<Arkay> I'll channel one more time just in case since I have plenty left
<Arkay> !roll 3 6
<BonBonne> Arkay rolled 6-sided die number 1 of 3: Result 4
<BonBonne> Arkay rolled 6-sided die number 2 of 3: Result 1
<BonBonne> Arkay rolled 6-sided die number 3 of 3: Result 5
<~flibbyjibbits> the throne room has the large, steel throne in the center of it, a few abandoned tables, some of which still have skeletons sitting on them, then there is a door behind the throne, as well as a large double door way off to the side to the right, which based on the layout of the castle, leads to the wizard tower
<Arkay> and then 10 more hp
<~flibbyjibbits> to the left there is a wide opening to a balcony that overlooks the former city
<Fishfosh> Human skeletons or more kobolds?
<Skeleton> My Evil Detector is with me all of the time, Evil Detector watch it shine
<~flibbyjibbits> human dwarf elf tengu etc
<~flibbyjibbits> no kobolds though
<Fishfosh> ok
<~flibbyjibbits> he really just hated reptiles
<Fishfosh> "Wonder who those people were."
<Fishfosh> "You know, before they gave up their careers and pursued the path of becoming a skeleton."
<Arkay> the path of becoming a freddie
<Moonside> Is our little cowardly friend around?
<Skeleton> The path of becoming a me
<Moonside> it's-a you, skeleton
<Skeleton> It
<Skeleton> is. A me.
<Skeleton> Thank you so much for to shaking my hand
<~flibbyjibbits> the walls have faded and eroded releif sculptings of various battle scenes
<Fishfosh> Are the skeletons wearing anything?
<~flibbyjibbits> im not sure if clothes would still be there 750 years later in open air
<Fishfosh> they're NAKED
<Fishfosh> elf-made clothes might, I would think
<Skeleton> No armor either?
<Skeleton> Or any other metal
<CommodoreJim> NAKED.
<Fishfosh> unless they just buy new clothes hundreds of times throughout their life
<~flibbyjibbits> yeah i guess
<~flibbyjibbits> some have bits of clothing and decorative armor on but cloth and stuff probably decomposed
<Fishfosh> Pikkupstix will take a closer look at that throne
<~flibbyjibbits> it seems to be a solid steel block with a seat carved in it
<Fishfosh> No artistic carvings or engravings or inlays?
<~flibbyjibbits> on the throne itself, no
<Fishfosh> doesn't sound very kingly
<~flibbyjibbits> i guess he thought having a big metal cube with a corner cut off was symbolic of something
<Fishfosh> Pikkup sits on the throne to think about which way to go from here
<~flibbyjibbits> whos carrying the box
<Fishfosh> I think pikkupstix may have been, in the haversack
<Fishfosh> but I can't remember
<Fishfosh> and it's not on my sheet, so maybe not
<~flibbyjibbits> alright well it crawls out of the haversack on bloody red spiderlegs and runs over to the door to the wizards tower
<Fishfosh> "hey!"
<Moonside> Is it evil?
<~flibbyjibbits> it is unintelligent but out of the big huge mix of spells running probably at least a few of them have the evil descpritor
<Skeleton> "Um. Where does that box think it's going?"
<Fishfosh> "Looks like the old wizard's tower."
<Moonside> Well, that's not very good at all, so I use Lay on Hands on myself again and go after it.
<Moonside> Can I saw that LoH heals max since it's out of battle or roll still
<~flibbyjibbits> the spiderlegs extend and it gets taller, and it latches itself to the wall over the door, pulled taught over the surface
<Fishfosh> wat
<Arkay> "Huh, so does anyone want to try and get it back?"
<Moonside> "Parts of it are Evil."
<Fishfosh> "Nah... I think it's fulfilling its purpose."
<~flibbyjibbits> trying to describe what its doing its like uh
<CommodoreJim> "...I'm going to be blunt, this makes me uncomfortable."
<Arkay> i'd like to make you uncomfortable bby
<~flibbyjibbits> right now its just the legs coming out of the box are dug into the walls and floor and holding the door shut while the box itself is just stuck to the door and some other little tendrils snake out of it and over the stones of that wall
<Fishfosh> Is it just sealing the door shut?
<Fishfosh> or something else
<CommodoreJim> Is it mating with the door
<Fishfosh> Is this how new doors are made?
<Skeleton> Baby doors
<Skeleton> Son you may just be a catflap today
<Skeleton> But if you dream big and work hard you can be a bank vault door
<Fishfosh> Why did Telmar want us to deliver a door-fucking machine?
<~flibbyjibbits> right now its covering over the door but its slowly going to cover the wall
<~flibbyjibbits> not much of the floor, just that section of wall
<Moonside> I attack it with my sword.
<Fishfosh> Does the halfing have anything to say about this?
<Moonside> He's probably hiding in the closet.
<CommodoreJim> 'i am envious of that door'
<CommodoreJim> 'i mean what???'
<~flibbyjibbits> you're attacking the box with your sword?
<Moonside> Yeah?
<~flibbyjibbits> !roll 1 20
<BonBonne> flibbyjibbits rolled 20-sided die number 1 of 1: Result 19
<~flibbyjibbits> elsa is blown across the room like a cartoon character getting electrified
<~flibbyjibbits> but unharmed overall
<Moonside> "..."
<Fishfosh> "Brilliant."
<CommodoreJim> "Intriguing."
<CommodoreJim> we'll have to tell elly about this next time we see her
<~flibbyjibbits> the guide guy apparently had some back into the room and was poking around the scultings on the other walls
<Fishfosh> "I sorta wanted to see the inside of the wizard tower, but this is interesting too."
<Moonside> "Who did you say gave you this package, again?"
<~flibbyjibbits> i mentioed  the other doors too right
<Moonside> Yeah.
<Fishfosh> "Telmar."
<Moonside> "..."
<Skeleton> "That son of a bitch."
<Fishfosh> "Or, well, he ordered it."
<CommodoreJim> Drom frowns. He does not like hearing about that guy.
<Moonside> "Let us check the other doors."
<Fishfosh> "The actual box came from a drug dealer"
<Fishfosh> Yeah, let's go through the other door I guess
<~flibbyjibbits> the door behind the throne opens into a room that should be familiar by now
<Moonside> The fountain?
<~flibbyjibbits> i forget which number it is on the floor here and dont feel like getting out my notes, but theres the engravings all over the walls and ceiling, with the 3 doors, each other side of the room
<~flibbyjibbits> shrine 17 i think
<Moonside> Are the engravings readable?
<~flibbyjibbits> theyre in a more archaic form of the language but technically yes
<Moonside> Let's check the left room.
<~flibbyjibbits> the left room is always the fountain, the far room is the statue, and the room to the right varies
<Moonside> Yeah, the left room.
<~flibbyjibbits> the guide goes into the room to the right, which apparently contains numerous preserved records of the kingdom, while you go to the fountain room
<Skeleton> "Deja vu"
<~flibbyjibbits> the fountain looks as normal, but with a row of goblets along the edge, and a metal plaque on the wall explains the rules of it in several languages
<Fishfosh> "Which fountain was this one?"
<Moonside> What does the plauq sy?
<Moonside> say
<Moonside> plaque
<Moonside> wow I fucked that up
<Fishfosh> the plague
<~flibbyjibbits> the common version is in old common which is pretty much opaque to a modern reader, but the alternate languages of it convery the idea that
<~flibbyjibbits> convey*
<~flibbyjibbits> each drinker can ask one and only one question about the past
<~flibbyjibbits> specifically if they had at some point acted differently, where would they be now
<~flibbyjibbits> as in, you ask the question and it shows you where you'd be at this time
<Moonside> Does it need to be said out loud?
<~flibbyjibbits> no
<~flibbyjibbits> further drinks provide no benefit other than refreshment
<Fishfosh> hmm
<~flibbyjibbits> he apparently used the fountain to entertain visiting dignitatries
<~flibbyjibbits> gonna go get my laundry while you think this over
<Fishfosh> Only one question, but what...
<Moonside> Elsa takes her helmet off, sets it aside, and takes a drink.
<Skeleton> "W-watch out, that water does insane stuff"
<Fishfosh> "This one seems harmless enough"
<Skeleton> "You might turn into a baby or summon another bad version of you from another timeline or"
<~flibbyjibbits> kback
<Moonside> "...sigh." She looks visibly disappointed as she puts her helmet back on.
<Skeleton> "So what happened?"
<Moonside> "..."
<Moonside> "Nothing. Nothing happened. Let's go."
<Moonside> "That is, if none of you wish to ask anything."
<~flibbyjibbits> cant freddie see what it does since theres a sign right there
<Skeleton> tl;dr
<Fishfosh> "I wanna take a turn, I'm just thinking a bit about what to ask.
<Fishfosh> "
<Moonside> "Very well." She walks out back to the first room.
<Fishfosh> "Anyone else want to go while I'm still thinking?"
<Skeleton> Freddie reads the sign "Oh. Hmmm..."
<Fishfosh> I thought drom might want to ask it what would have happened if he had stopped Gil from killing the king
<CommodoreJim> I'm considering that
<Moonside> I'm actually guessing that nothing would've really changed, since it's a thing that could've actually happened and any changes would've otherwise broken the plot.
<Fishfosh> brb one minute
<Moonside> Which is the say, he would've sent us in the adventure anyway.
<Fishfosh> Yes, but in character he may want to ask that
<Moonside> Yeah. Elsa's question was pretty much in character too.
<Moonside> Or just for flavor, I guess.
<CommodoreJim> Drom removes his own helmet and takes a step forward, taking a drink. WHAT IF I HADN'T BEEN A SHITTY GUARD AND THE KING LIVED
<Skeleton> Freddie drinks some. What if he hadn't drunk the water in the first fountain?
<Fishfosh> Pikkup drinks.  What if he had gone looking for Luce instead of delivering that spider-legged-door-raping box for Telmar?
<Arkay> Raynar drinks. What if he didn't join the party?
<Skeleton> He'd still have his eye, hand and leg, would be a much less jaded and grizzled man
<Skeleton> The tragedy of losing his only daughter would have still left him broken without the adventure showing him the hope in the world.
<CommodoreJim> Drom looks quite shocked, staring at the water for a moment before turning and placing his helmet back on.
<Skeleton> His weed business would have taken off, making him a bajillionaire!
<Moonside> Welp.
<Arkay> Raynar isn't too shocked at his alternate future, but deems it as being not that bad
<CommodoreJim> Drom leans on the wall and broods as he waits for everyone to finish
<Fishfosh> brb again
<Skeleton> Freddie looks like he usually does
<Fishfosh> Pikkupstix is shocked, for that is not even close to what he expected or hoped to see.  "What the FUCK was that all about!?"
<Skeleton> "Wh-what"
<CommodoreJim> Drom looks up. "Hm?"
<Arkay> "What's up?"
<Fishfosh> "Oh, um... Nothing.  It's personal."
<Skeleton> "Gotcha"
<Fishfosh> "I, uh... guess we're done here?"
<Skeleton> "Well there's that crazy pill box and... did the average height of our group go way up, or is it just me"
<~flibbyjibbits> theres a very loud cracking/crunching noise
<~flibbyjibbits> and the room shakes
<Skeleton> "Oh boy"
<~flibbyjibbits> like an earthquake level shaking just for a few seconds. nothing seems to break fortunately
<Moonside> The first one as well?
<Moonside> well I guess obviously
<~flibbyjibbits> really the whole structure
<Moonside> Elsa runs back to the throne room.
<~flibbyjibbits> the entire tower is missing
<~flibbyjibbits> its just kinda gone
<Moonside> "..."
<Moonside> She goes back to the fountain room to inform the others of what happened.
<Fishfosh> "Welp"
<Skeleton> "How did we become such weirdness magnets"
<Moonside> "Do any of you know what was in that package?"
<Fishfosh> "Magic and some dwarf-crafted things, nothing more specific than that."
<Moonside> "...well. Regardless, we should probably head back."
<Fishfosh> Before we do, I wanted to at least peek into the statue room
<Fishfosh> just in case there's something interesting in there
<Moonside> And also talk to the little guy.
<~flibbyjibbits> the statue is rakor sitting on the throne
<Fishfosh> ok
<~flibbyjibbits> the guide is traumatized and freaking out over the tower dissapearing, hes speaking in halfling hes so upset
<Fishfosh> I didn't even know halflings HAD their own language!
<Fishfosh> How many words for breakfast does it have?
<~flibbyjibbits> a lot
<~flibbyjibbits> each refering to a specific type of breakfast
<Skeleton> That's weird
<Skeleton> I have "breakfast" which refers to /anything/ as long as I'm eating it right after waking up
<Arkay> same
<Arkay> unless i pull an all-nighter
<Arkay> then it's anything i eat after I guess 5
<~flibbyjibbits> halflings take meals very seriously
<~flibbyjibbits> they have a word for a breakfast eaten at 9 am with eggs and toast, then a different word for one at 9 15 with eggs on toast, not to even mention the different conjugations depending on what you drank and prefixes for how the eggs were cooked
<Fishfosh> Well, guess we'd better escort the little guy back to the entrance and be on our way
<Skeleton> So
<Skeleton> It's like... a Denny's menu
<~flibbyjibbits> denny was the patron saint of hobbits
<~flibbyjibbits> and yes i guess so
<Fishfosh> Denny's had a special menu for a while when The Hobbit was in theaters
<Skeleton> Hahahahahaha
<~flibbyjibbits> hes clutching a busehl of historic documents looted from the room on the right as you leave
<Moonside> "Little friend, are you well?"
<CommodoreJim> Ack, sorry if I missed anything, I fell asleep at my desk
<Moonside> Should we stop, then?
<~flibbyjibbits> yeah probably then
<CommodoreJim> yeah my bed sounds nice
<Fishfosh> Alright
<Skeleton> My bed is silent, I would be alarmed if it made noise
<Fishfosh> Not a bad place to stop anyway
<Arkay> night jimmu
<Skeleton> Good nizzle
<Fishfosh> night-night