Cipher's Harrowing Holiday

Clickity clack clickity clack... tap tap tap... click... click...
>And with that the deed was done.
>You hoped it was enough.
>Just a moment a while ago your friend got off for the night.
>Or at least she though she did.
>She had apparently left her computer on.
>It wasn't too uncommon for her to do that.
>It is thanks to that habit that you know where to send the gift.
>You had heard her mention her address when she was either ordering something or needed something fixed.
>But this today you heard her crying.
>You have no idea why but she sounded absolutely devastated.
>A while before she mentioned she really wanted to buy a venus fly trap but couldn't afford it.
>Hopefully it get's there tomorrow.
>What to do now though?
>No particularly interesting threads on any part of ponechan today.
>A bit too tired to play anything at the moment.
>Don't really feel like working on any of your projects either.
>Maybe you'll just go to sleep.
>You crawl onto your fold up couch.
>You should really fold it out into a bed but it was always such a pain in the ass.
>You'll probably get around to it when your back starts to hurt like it usually ends up doing.
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
>Who could that be?
>You didn't order any food today...
>You look out the peep hole.
>It's a stallion, and he doesn't seem to have food.
>You unlock all the locks and open the door a bit and stick your head out.
>"H-hello?"
>"Hey, Cipher right?"
>WHO THE FUCK IS HE?!
>HOW DOES HE NOW YOUR NAME?!
>OH CELESTIA!
>HE'S ONE OF THOSE GLOW IN THE DARK MOTHER FUCKERS!
>THIS IS HOW IT ENDS!
>I got some of your mail today in my mailbox today.
>Oh...
>He's just a neighbor.
>He gives you some junk mail addressed to you.
>Not sure why he thought you would care about that.
>"Th-thanks"
>Just a "Thanks" and not a "Thank you"? now he's gonna think you hate him.
>Damnit why do you have to over think this shit?
>Wait why is he still standing there?
>"That's not the only reason I came here..."
>What other reason could he possibly have for coming here?
>Hopefully you didn't fuck something up.
>"Some of the other tenants and I are having a Hearths Warming party tomorrow night."
>Oh, he just came to warn you about the noise, that's perfectly-
>"And I came here to invite you!"
>Invite... me? to a party?!
>"I'm not sure if you have anything already planned for tomorrow, but if you can make it we'd be glad to have you!"
>This would have been much easier if he had just come to kill you.
>"I'll uh... see what I can do..." you say, shrinking back behind the door a bit.
>"Well we hope you can make it! if you are able it's down in apartment 36, and it should be starting around 7 or so."
>"G-great" This conversation has gone on longer then you're comfortable with.
>"Hope to see you there!" he says before going down the hall.
>You swiftly shut the door, press you back against it and slide down onto the floor.
>A party?
>You?
>Well... you don't have to go.
>But you were invited to...
>It's not like you're doing anything special that night.
>But that means socializing, and you're terrible at that.
>What are you going to even talk about? Compilers? switch statements? calls to sub routines?
>You are one boring pony.
>Well you have until tomorrow night to figure out what to talk about, or decide whether to not to actually go.
>You do something nice for somepony else and this is how the universe thanks you.
>No good deed goes unpunished you guess.
>Maybe you should go to sleep and gather your thoughts when you wake up.
>You return to your fold up couch and lay down.
>You awake probably 10 hours later, but still lay on that couch.
>Gazing at the ceiling thinking about your options.
>Maybe you shouldn't go...
>It's probably better they don't get to know you and realize what a weirdo you are.
>On the other hand, there is probably free food, and it's probably better then what you've been eating most of the time...
>The prospect of fancy food is pretty enticing.
>Fuck it.
>It will be probably be better then spending your night blowing your baby batter into tissues like usual.
>Damnit, that means taking a shower...
>Just some time to think about what to talk about you guess... and maybe some other things...
>You go to the bathroom and get in the shower.
>That grey-green spot has gotten bigger...
>Whatever, you have more pressing matters at hoof.
>You soap yourself up and start scrubbing.
>While doing so you remember that mare who was in front of you at the convenience store with the piercings...
>Well why not?
>Maybe it'll keep you from popping a boner at the party, at least for a while anyway.
>Afterwards you turn off the water and shake yourself off before stepping out.
>You stepo out of the bathroom and look at the clock.
>5:53 PM
>Shit, seems your shower thoughts took longer then you thought.
>You still have about an hour...
>You still don't have idea what to talk about...
>Guess you'll just have to wing it.
>Just gotta remember not to drop any Z bombs.
>As long as you don't do that, you should hopefully be fine.
>With much better things to do you instead decide to browse ponechan a bit instead of using your time wisely to think up things to talk about.
>You look at the time.
>6:48
>Better get going...
>With a deep breath you step out into the hallway and head towards the stairs.
>The elevator works perfectly fine but you're trying to buy some time.
>Well, here you are... apartment 36.
>You can hear lots talking from inside.
>This is going to be rough.
>Another heavy sigh.
>You knock on the door.
>The pony who invited answers the door.
>"Cipher! you made it!"
>"Hey..."
>Uhh...
>YOU FORGOT HIS NAME?!
>Wait... did he even tell you his name?
>You freeze up
>Off to great start already
>"Sunny! Where are the extra cups?"
>He looks back at a pink mare with blue hair.
>"Oh, hello there." She approaches you you.
>"Hey, Candy! this is Cipher, he lives on your floor."
>She shakes your hoof.
>Oh shit, a mare touched you.
>"It's nice to meet you!" She says.
>"It-it's n-nice to meet you t-too"
>Probably a good thing you took a long shower.
>Popping a boner over a hoofshake would make for a terrible first impression.
>"Come on in, come on in!" Sunny says as he ushers you in.
>"There is food over on that table there" Candy point over to a large table covered in various snacks and drinks.
>"Now if you'll excuse me, Sunny and I need to find the cups." She turns around and heads to what you guess is the kitchen with Sunny.
>Now it's just you and a bunch of ponies in a stranger's living room.
>You carefully make your way to the food.
>Lots to choose from.
>As you decide what to snack on something bumps into you.
>A very pink mare has backed into you.
>Oh sweet Celestia, another mare touched you.
>This time with her butt.
>You touched a mares butt!
>Uh oh.
>A twitch.
>"Ohmygosh! I'm sorry!"
>That voice sounds familiar...
>As she turned to face you catch a glimpse of her cutie mark.
>Balloons.
>It couldn't be...
>You look at the mares face.
>It looks like her...
>But her mane is different...
>It's flattened out, not wild and curly.
>The resemblance and cutie mark are pretty uncanny though.
>"Hi! I'm Pi- Party Favor!" She says.
>"H-hey, I'm C-Cipher"
>"It's so nice to meet you Cipher! Are you having a good time?"
>"Um, y-yeah! A great time!" You did get to touch a mares butt, so it is going pretty well.
>"Ooooh! what do we have here?!" she looks at the table of goodies and get distracted picking out things to eat.
>You can't believe you thought Pinkie Pie would be here.
>Could you imagine?
>Touching Pinkie Pie's butt?
>How soft and warm it would be as you...
>WAIT
>NO
>STAHP
>You quickly grab a plate and start focusing on the food on the table.
>There was quite a bit to choose from.
>Baked goods, fancy crackers and cheeses and veggie platters.
>A lot of choices to distract you from boner thoughts.
>"Hello there!"
>You turn to see a burly blue stallion holding out his hoof.
>"H-hi" You say as you reach out to meet his hoof.
>Upon contact he starts violently shaking it as he introduces himself.
>"Rusty Wrench! Plumber by trade"
>"Oh... n-neat." he's going to tear your arm off at this rate.
>"How about you?"
>How about I wha- OH
>"Cipher, I'm a uhhh... programmer"
>"Really?" he finally lets go of your hoof.
>"What do you program?" He seems genuinely interested.
>"Uhh... well, a lot of scripts automate various tasks to allow ponies to focus on more important tasks that can't or shouldn't be automated."
>"Huh, that sounds pretty fancy"
>Those kinda of things were pretty basic, but you suppose that would sound pretty fancy if you had no knowledge of programming.
>"Oh hey, is that hummus?"
>He moves past you and starts plopping some dollops of Hummus on a plate while striking up a conversation with Party Favor.
>Whew...
>All this excitement has got your bladder worked up.
>You go in search of the bathroom.
>Fortunately you don't need to ask anyone where it is.
>You go in and lock the door and turn the handle to be absolutely sure it's locked.
>As you start relieving yourself you notice Sunny's choice of bathroom reading.
>Neighshonal Geographic.
>Huh... Wonder if he's got any with Zeeb titties?
>After you finish you take a look.
>Oh yeah he does...
>OH CELESTIA DAMNIT!
>It's fine, a little chub, but nothing that won't go down in a bit.
>You put the magazine back and flush the toilet.
>Huh...
>Isn't the water supposed to go down?
>You flush it again.
>Uhhh...
>Uh oh...
>It's rising really fast.
>SHIT
>PANIC TIME
>You find the plunger and start pumping.
>Nothing.
>How did this happen?!
>All did was take a piss!
>Wait... Rusty!
>You step out of the bathroom and bump into Sunny.
>"Hey Cipher! having a good time?"
>Not at this moment.
>"Umm, the uhh... the bathroom... umm... I uhh..." It's kinda hard to admit to your host you may have flooded his bathroom.
>He look's confused.
>He looks into the bathroom.
>"OH DAMNIT!"
>That's it, he hates you now.
>You fucked up his nice bathroom.
>And now everypony is going to know you as the guy who ruined the Hearths Warming party.
>Your face is burning up.
>Rusty comes over and looks inside.
>"I told him that pipe was still fucked up from last year! Shoulda just taken care of it myself."
>What?
>It wasn't your fault?
>Oh thank Celestia!
>"Crap, we're gonna have to end the party early..."
>It just keeps getting better!
>"Everpony! could I get your attention!?"
>Everypony turns to Sunny as he explains the situation.
>"If some of you could stick around and help clean up that would be great!"
>Your first instinct is to say "Fuck that" and sneak out.
>But
>They did invite you and you did have a nice time...
>You could help out, if just for a little bit
>You help by piling towels in front of the bathroom door to help soak up the flood from the toilet.
>Rusty apparently went to the root of the problem in the basement, swearing the whole way out.
>Afterwards Candy gives you a wrapped plate
>"A little something for you to snack on when you get home" she says.
>"Th-thank you." That was really nice, especially since you didn't actually get to eat anything.
>"Oh and here." Sunny gives you a brightly colored bag.
>"Just a little Hearths Warming present."
>You grab it by the handle with your mouth.
>"Shank yoush"
>"See ya later! Don't be stranger now!" Sunny says as you head out.
>You wave to him as you leave.
>That was awfully nice of him.
>Upon returning home you set the plate down on the counter and drop the bag gently on the floor and look inside.
>A fancy cheese, cracker and mustard box alongside a a festive coffee mug.
>This whole thing went a lot better then it probably should have.
>You didn't make a huge ass of yourself and kinda made some... acquaintances.
>Probably a bit too early to call them friends just yet.
>And now that you're in the privacy of your own home...
>You can resume that thought about Pinkie Pie's soft round ass.

END