apple

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Subtitles by explosiveskull

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Trick or treat.

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Hi.

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Oh, you guys look so cute here.

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Alright, for you as well.

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Alright.

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Happy Halloween.

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00:01:01,516 --> 00:01:03,140
Okay kids,
Happy Halloween.

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No right.

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You had no right to...

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Baby Mark.

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Fuck!

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Honey, I'm home.

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00:06:24,911 --> 00:06:28,079
Happy
Halloween, students.

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00:06:28,081 --> 00:06:31,792
Masks will not be
permitted on campus today.

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So, if you have a mask...

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Tommy, mask, off!

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Please place
it inside your locker

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00:06:39,422 --> 00:06:43,634
and leave it there until
the end of the school day.

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00:06:43,636 --> 00:06:48,345
Thank you for your understanding
and cooperation, students.

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00:06:48,347 --> 00:06:50,765
And, have a blessed holiday.

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00:06:52,267 --> 00:06:54,769
Hey, Mama, what's your name?

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My name is Mrs. Block

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and I start teaching
here next week.

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00:07:01,609 --> 00:07:02,981
Why?

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00:07:02,983 --> 00:07:06,363
Because I'm a teacher
and it's my job.

27
00:07:07,488 --> 00:07:09,446
No, I mean, why here?

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00:07:09,448 --> 00:07:12,324
Mrs. Block, Principal
Dale will see you now.

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00:07:12,326 --> 00:07:13,369
Thank you.

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00:07:14,618 --> 00:07:17,371
It was nice
meeting you, Tommy.

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Call me.

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God damn
it, Tommy, stop hitting

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on every woman who walks
in here or I will end you.

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00:07:38,222 --> 00:07:42,975
So, how is small town life
treating you, Mrs. Block?

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Well, I mean, there's
some adjustments for sure,

36
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but, uh, it's nice.

37
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Where
are you from originally,

38
00:07:53,485 --> 00:07:55,485
Los Angeles, if
my memory serves?

39
00:07:55,487 --> 00:07:57,987
Yes, my husband and I are
both native to Los Angeles.

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00:07:57,989 --> 00:08:00,321
And, you taught
middle school out there.

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Yes, for about eight years.

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00:08:02,492 --> 00:08:05,659
Oh, that
must've been hell.

43
00:08:05,661 --> 00:08:10,038
It's not as bad as you might
imagine or may have heard.

44
00:08:10,040 --> 00:08:13,168
I'm sure, but I
have heard stories.

45
00:08:14,502 --> 00:08:17,003
What kinda stories?

46
00:08:17,005 --> 00:08:21,089
Oh, you know, troubled
youth stories, hooligans,

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Los Angeles ne'er-do-wells.

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I mean, there are
certainly some bad apples,

49
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but I can assure you that is
not a California relegation.

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Sure, sure.

51
00:08:43,526 --> 00:08:47,235
But truthfully, this whole
world has gone to hell

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00:08:47,237 --> 00:08:50,783
in a hand basket and
not just Los Angeles.

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00:08:53,534 --> 00:08:58,245
We have to watch these kids
closer than ever before,

54
00:08:58,247 --> 00:08:59,623
keep an eye out.

55
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These kids, they're dangerous.

56
00:09:04,210 --> 00:09:06,045
They're dangerous now.

57
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I'm sure I'll do just fine.

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00:09:11,592 --> 00:09:14,134
Are you a God-fearing woman?

59
00:09:19,390 --> 00:09:21,890
Are you asking me
if I'm religious?

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00:09:21,892 --> 00:09:26,060
I'm asking you if you
fear the good Lord on high.

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00:09:26,062 --> 00:09:27,937
I'm sorry, Principal
Dale, I'm struggling

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00:09:27,939 --> 00:09:31,899
to understand how that
question is relevant.

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It's not.

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Consider it a personal
inquiry on my behalf.

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00:09:39,948 --> 00:09:44,159
Okay, then I would say that
I am agnostic, if anything.

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00:09:45,912 --> 00:09:48,579
I don't subscribe to a
particular core belief system.

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00:09:48,581 --> 00:09:49,581
Oh, I see.

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You're one of those
science people.

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00:09:55,671 --> 00:09:57,088
Well, never mind.

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00:09:57,964 --> 00:09:59,422
Look, Mrs. Block...

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Call me Ella.

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00:10:01,342 --> 00:10:02,426
Mrs. Block.

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00:10:03,635 --> 00:10:07,095
Now, you may be used to
certain teaching methods

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00:10:07,097 --> 00:10:11,514
back where you're from
and I, and by I, I mean,

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00:10:11,516 --> 00:10:13,601
the board, respect that.

76
00:10:14,769 --> 00:10:17,480
But, what you have to respect is

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this is a very particular town

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00:10:21,816 --> 00:10:24,775
with a very particular
way of life,

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way of belief, way of education.

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If you can adapt to
that with an open mind,

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you'll fit in just fine.

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You come highly
recommended and frankly,

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00:10:39,622 --> 00:10:41,873
I thank the good
Lord that you're here

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00:10:41,875 --> 00:10:46,129
because we could certainly use
someone with your background.

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I just don't wanna
have any issues.

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There won't be any.

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Great, then I'm excited

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to see you here come Monday.

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00:11:02,141 --> 00:11:04,060
Okay, see you Monday.

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00:11:05,227 --> 00:11:08,146
Oh, Mrs. Block,
Happy Halloween.

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00:11:38,505 --> 00:11:40,216
You set the alarm?

92
00:11:42,009 --> 00:11:44,552
I don't wanna sleep all day.

93
00:11:46,012 --> 00:11:48,011
I thought you
had a meeting this morning.

94
00:11:48,013 --> 00:11:49,097
I did.

95
00:11:49,099 --> 00:11:50,179
I came back home and got in bed

96
00:11:50,181 --> 00:11:52,767
just to sleep for half an hour.

97
00:11:54,268 --> 00:11:55,186
Get up.

98
00:11:56,396 --> 00:11:59,607
Honey, even God
took a day off work.

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00:12:01,566 --> 00:12:04,441
This moving is kicking my
ass six ways from Sunday

100
00:12:04,443 --> 00:12:06,195
and I don't like it.

101
00:12:07,238 --> 00:12:09,363
There's a veritable
boatload of boxes

102
00:12:09,365 --> 00:12:11,198
crying to be unpacked.

103
00:12:11,200 --> 00:12:15,200
We can't let their cries
go unheard for very long.

104
00:12:15,202 --> 00:12:17,536
We don't wanna look like bums.

105
00:12:17,538 --> 00:12:20,204
But, everyone think
we're bums, who?

106
00:12:20,206 --> 00:12:21,289
Who's gonna think we're bums?

107
00:12:21,291 --> 00:12:22,749
We don't know
anybody in this town.

108
00:12:22,751 --> 00:12:24,918
Not for long, shiny
personalities such as ours

109
00:12:24,920 --> 00:12:27,880
need other similar
auras to thrive.

110
00:12:31,050 --> 00:12:33,552
Honey, I start work tonight,

111
00:12:34,885 --> 00:12:38,387
Halloween Night,
at the hospital.

112
00:12:38,389 --> 00:12:40,222
Brother needs to sleep.

113
00:12:40,224 --> 00:12:43,057
Do you know how many candy
apple-related child injuries

114
00:12:43,059 --> 00:12:44,474
I'm gonna have to deal with?

115
00:12:44,476 --> 00:12:46,644
Makes me sad just
thinking about it.

116
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Fine, be a bum.

117
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Okay, I will.

118
00:12:51,650 --> 00:12:54,445
I'm going to do
some unpacking.

119
00:13:00,574 --> 00:13:01,742
Coffee, stat.

120
00:13:03,409 --> 00:13:05,120
Yeah, yeah.

121
00:13:07,079 --> 00:13:09,454
Why do we even
have this still?

122
00:13:09,456 --> 00:13:11,582
It's a giant R.

123
00:13:11,584 --> 00:13:13,834
Coffee stat, my ass.

124
00:13:13,836 --> 00:13:15,461
Coffee, coffee, no.

125
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♪ Da da da da da

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00:13:36,313 --> 00:13:39,354
♪ Da da da da da

127
00:13:39,356 --> 00:13:40,772
Honey, is that you?

128
00:13:40,774 --> 00:13:42,190
No, it's not.

129
00:13:42,192 --> 00:13:43,940
Hey,
you wanna join me?

130
00:13:43,942 --> 00:13:46,276
Sorry, too busy
for copulation.

131
00:13:46,278 --> 00:13:48,279
Come on, we gotta
break in the new place.

132
00:13:48,281 --> 00:13:50,279
There's a cup of
coffee for you on the tub.

133
00:13:53,117 --> 00:13:57,369
Hey, hey, if I use,
if I use curly shampoo

134
00:13:57,371 --> 00:14:00,625
on my head, will it
make my hair curly?

135
00:14:05,795 --> 00:14:06,963
God save me.

136
00:14:08,297 --> 00:14:09,505
You're stressing yourself out.

137
00:14:09,507 --> 00:14:10,881
I'm not
stressing myself out.

138
00:14:10,883 --> 00:14:11,881
You're worrying.

139
00:14:11,883 --> 00:14:13,342
I'm not worrying.

140
00:14:13,344 --> 00:14:15,050
We should hire day laborers.

141
00:14:15,052 --> 00:14:17,135
You trust day
laborers with our stuff?

142
00:14:17,137 --> 00:14:18,304
Racist.

143
00:14:18,306 --> 00:14:20,179
No, it has nothing
to do with race.

144
00:14:20,181 --> 00:14:21,514
You know
what this house needs?

145
00:14:21,516 --> 00:14:22,474
Organization?

146
00:14:22,476 --> 00:14:23,725
A pumpkin.

147
00:14:23,727 --> 00:14:25,810
Why the hell do
we need a pumpkin?

148
00:14:25,812 --> 00:14:27,313
It's Halloween.

149
00:14:31,192 --> 00:14:32,317
Wow, is it?

150
00:14:34,027 --> 00:14:36,527
Lady, you're oblivious.

151
00:14:36,529 --> 00:14:38,362
Are you not aware of
your surroundings?

152
00:14:38,364 --> 00:14:40,197
Forgive me.

153
00:14:40,199 --> 00:14:41,824
Are you gonna rinse that?

154
00:14:41,826 --> 00:14:43,074
Eventually.

155
00:14:43,076 --> 00:14:44,033
I'm gonna head to the
supermarket we saw

156
00:14:44,035 --> 00:14:45,492
on the way into town.

157
00:14:45,494 --> 00:14:47,828
There's a supermarket
on the way into town?

158
00:14:47,830 --> 00:14:49,831
Oblivious.

159
00:14:50,248 --> 00:14:53,332
Robert, we just have so
much to do around here.

160
00:14:53,334 --> 00:14:55,001
We don't need to waste
our time decorating.

161
00:14:55,003 --> 00:14:56,502
I'm gonna cut you off there.

162
00:14:56,504 --> 00:14:59,004
We totally can waste
time decorating.

163
00:14:59,006 --> 00:15:00,505
It's the best part
of being an adult.

164
00:15:00,507 --> 00:15:03,007
You get to pick and choose
when to be responsible.

165
00:15:03,009 --> 00:15:05,719
And, plus, I'm not even
saying we whole hog it.

166
00:15:05,721 --> 00:15:08,886
I'm simply suggesting
that we carve a silly face

167
00:15:08,888 --> 00:15:11,347
into a pumpkin to
help center us.

168
00:15:11,349 --> 00:15:13,099
I'm centered.

169
00:15:13,101 --> 00:15:15,851
You're also a liar, not
a very convincing one,

170
00:15:15,853 --> 00:15:17,855
but a liar nonetheless.

171
00:15:19,398 --> 00:15:22,691
Fine, get your stupid pumpkin.

172
00:15:22,693 --> 00:15:24,192
But, no candy.

173
00:15:24,194 --> 00:15:26,694
I prefer not to have to
field a myriad of knocks

174
00:15:26,696 --> 00:15:29,029
from expectant hungry
kids all night.

175
00:15:29,031 --> 00:15:31,032
God, you're lame.

176
00:15:31,034 --> 00:15:33,701
I have shit to do, understand?

177
00:15:34,786 --> 00:15:36,536
I need keys.

178
00:15:36,538 --> 00:15:40,583
Pivot your head
a little to your right.

179
00:15:41,875 --> 00:15:43,083
Really?

180
00:15:43,085 --> 00:15:44,875
That's the first
thing you unpack.

181
00:15:44,877 --> 00:15:48,714
Organization, that's
what this place needs.

182
00:15:49,590 --> 00:15:52,300
Well, it also needs a pumpkin.

183
00:15:53,593 --> 00:15:55,217
Have fun unpacking.

184
00:15:55,219 --> 00:15:56,053
Thanks.

185
00:16:12,567 --> 00:16:13,401
Rinsing.

186
00:16:18,073 --> 00:16:19,406
Accomplishment.

187
00:16:29,915 --> 00:16:31,958
It's gonna be a long day.

188
00:17:18,373 --> 00:17:19,290
Who is it?

189
00:17:20,790 --> 00:17:22,999
Woo hoo.

190
00:17:23,001 --> 00:17:25,168
Hi, it's Mrs. Dekker.

191
00:17:25,170 --> 00:17:27,128
I'm your neighbor next door.

192
00:17:27,130 --> 00:17:30,800
I wanted to welcome you
to the neighborhood.

193
00:17:34,344 --> 00:17:35,220
Weirdo.

194
00:17:39,347 --> 00:17:43,476
Well, that's a bad idea,
if ever I've seen one.

195
00:17:45,728 --> 00:17:46,977
What is?

196
00:17:46,979 --> 00:17:49,812
Well, I didn't hear
you unlock the door,

197
00:17:49,814 --> 00:17:52,690
which leads me to believe
that you didn't lock it.

198
00:17:52,692 --> 00:17:54,819
Which is a very bad idea.

199
00:17:56,571 --> 00:17:57,485
Sorry.

200
00:17:57,487 --> 00:17:59,155
Oh no, don't be sorry to me.

201
00:17:59,157 --> 00:18:01,990
Be sorry to your
future terrorized self.

202
00:18:05,411 --> 00:18:06,996
I baked you a pie.

203
00:18:09,040 --> 00:18:11,915
Oh, that's very kind of you.

204
00:18:11,917 --> 00:18:14,168
It's got Halloween theme

205
00:18:15,170 --> 00:18:18,671
and little bite-sized
goodies in it.

206
00:18:19,839 --> 00:18:20,840
Thank you.

207
00:18:21,674 --> 00:18:23,426
You are so welcome.

208
00:18:27,012 --> 00:18:29,389
Uh, did you wanna come in?

209
00:18:31,224 --> 00:18:32,849
Oh no, no, I've been
in that whole house

210
00:18:32,851 --> 00:18:35,017
many, many times.

211
00:18:35,019 --> 00:18:38,687
No snooping notions for
this old hag.

212
00:18:38,689 --> 00:18:42,024
No, I just, I really just
wanted to welcome you

213
00:18:42,026 --> 00:18:44,235
to the neighborhood and to

214
00:18:46,196 --> 00:18:49,071
give you a little
word of warning.

215
00:18:49,073 --> 00:18:50,571
Oh, if it's about
locking the door,

216
00:18:50,573 --> 00:18:52,073
just consider that noted.

217
00:18:52,075 --> 00:18:53,532
My husband just left.

218
00:18:53,534 --> 00:18:57,371
No, it's a word of warning
about the neighborhood.

219
00:18:59,540 --> 00:19:03,540
You see, you being new and
it's such a nice street.

220
00:19:03,542 --> 00:19:06,543
It looks like it was ripped
out of a Rockwell painting,

221
00:19:06,545 --> 00:19:08,755
but there is one bad apple.

222
00:19:15,261 --> 00:19:18,973
His name is Samuel and
he is a sex offender.

223
00:19:21,724 --> 00:19:24,392
I figured since you're
new that you didn't get

224
00:19:24,394 --> 00:19:29,063
that whole door-to-door
admission of guilt thing.

225
00:19:29,065 --> 00:19:30,230
Yeah.

226
00:19:30,232 --> 00:19:31,773
Yeah, no, thank
you for telling me.

227
00:19:31,775 --> 00:19:36,236
Yeah, he worked over at the
elementary school on Madison.

228
00:19:36,238 --> 00:19:38,654
And, you know where Madison is?

229
00:19:38,656 --> 00:19:40,322
No, I can't say that I do.

230
00:19:40,324 --> 00:19:42,910
It's right by here and well,

231
00:19:43,909 --> 00:19:47,744
he was caught cavorting
with his students.

232
00:19:47,746 --> 00:19:48,622
Yeah.

233
00:19:49,747 --> 00:19:55,086
Kids, just children, really.

234
00:19:57,839 --> 00:19:59,838
Well, thank you for the pie.

235
00:19:59,840 --> 00:20:03,258
Oh yeah, yeah,
you're so welcome.

236
00:20:03,260 --> 00:20:05,804
Um.

237
00:20:07,762 --> 00:20:10,098
Welcome to the neighborhood.

238
00:20:28,280 --> 00:20:29,781
Oh, God damn it.

239
00:20:43,294 --> 00:20:44,628
Hey, I'm back.

240
00:20:53,135 --> 00:20:54,720
Hard at work I see.

241
00:21:02,684 --> 00:21:05,644
Honey, I'm home.

242
00:21:05,646 --> 00:21:07,480
Shit!

243
00:21:13,235 --> 00:21:16,987
I'm beginning to
question your work ethic.

244
00:21:19,823 --> 00:21:22,493
Can't hold your breath forever.

245
00:21:23,701 --> 00:21:26,912
Fine, if that's how
you wanna play it.

246
00:21:28,831 --> 00:21:30,500
Ass, turn it off.

247
00:21:31,999 --> 00:21:33,707
You ruined my perfectly
relaxing bath.

248
00:21:33,709 --> 00:21:35,043
That
was my intention.

249
00:21:35,045 --> 00:21:36,253
Ass.

250
00:21:36,255 --> 00:21:38,337
You said that already.

251
00:21:38,339 --> 00:21:40,004
I was taking a break.

252
00:21:40,006 --> 00:21:41,924
From working oh so hard.

253
00:21:41,926 --> 00:21:44,509
Yeah, I got a lot
of unpacking done.

254
00:21:44,511 --> 00:21:47,512
Not, I saw one box in the
living room that was empty.

255
00:21:47,514 --> 00:21:49,846
Did you check the kitchen?

256
00:21:49,848 --> 00:21:51,431
No, should I have?

257
00:21:51,433 --> 00:21:54,684
If you had checked the
kitchen, you presumptuous fool,

258
00:21:54,686 --> 00:21:57,853
you would've seen the results
of the bulk of my labor.

259
00:21:57,855 --> 00:22:00,272
And, I guess I'm just
supposed to take a report.

260
00:22:00,274 --> 00:22:01,855
You're my husband.

261
00:22:01,857 --> 00:22:03,232
You're supposed to take my
word on everything always.

262
00:22:03,234 --> 00:22:05,277
Oh Christ, is that
what I signed up for,

263
00:22:05,279 --> 00:22:08,237
blind suppositions
and constant nagging?

264
00:22:08,239 --> 00:22:09,613
Constant nagging, my ass.

265
00:22:09,615 --> 00:22:10,530
Get out!

266
00:22:10,532 --> 00:22:12,031
No.

267
00:22:12,033 --> 00:22:13,700
But, I totally
the temperature buzz

268
00:22:13,702 --> 00:22:15,242
with that water stunt.

269
00:22:15,244 --> 00:22:16,911
Actually, it's
quite comfortable.

270
00:22:16,913 --> 00:22:18,371
I think you should get in.

271
00:22:18,373 --> 00:22:21,289
I should most definitely
not do as you are suggesting.

272
00:22:21,291 --> 00:22:25,709
Because I got a trunk full of
pumpkins that need retrieving

273
00:22:25,711 --> 00:22:28,713
then carving before I gotta
haul ass to the hospital.

274
00:22:28,715 --> 00:22:32,050
Pumpkins not pumpkin,
meaning plural?

275
00:22:33,051 --> 00:22:34,216
Plethora.

276
00:22:34,218 --> 00:22:35,718
Oh God.

277
00:22:35,720 --> 00:22:37,552
I can't be trusted
when seasonally shopping.

278
00:22:37,554 --> 00:22:40,222
What can I say, I
festive by nature.

279
00:22:40,224 --> 00:22:43,099
Well, I've made a decision.

280
00:22:43,101 --> 00:22:44,725
About what?

281
00:22:44,727 --> 00:22:48,229
I think that you
must take a dip.

282
00:22:48,231 --> 00:22:49,062
What?

283
00:22:49,064 --> 00:22:49,896
No, no, no.

284
00:22:51,817 --> 00:22:52,734
Yes.

285
00:22:56,404 --> 00:23:00,239
General etiquette lesson,
just putting this out there.

286
00:23:00,241 --> 00:23:02,740
If you're going to dunk
someone in a tub of water

287
00:23:02,742 --> 00:23:05,451
against their will, it is
just polite to have a towel

288
00:23:05,453 --> 00:23:06,827
waiting for them.

289
00:23:06,829 --> 00:23:09,747
A real towel, not a hand towel

290
00:23:09,749 --> 00:23:12,123
the size of a
Muppet's loincloth.

291
00:23:12,125 --> 00:23:13,624
You drew first blood.

292
00:23:13,626 --> 00:23:16,753
My actions were
purely reactionary.

293
00:23:16,755 --> 00:23:20,087
What the hell are these doing
in the dining room, anyway?

294
00:23:20,089 --> 00:23:22,341
You gonna help me with
these pumpkins now?

295
00:23:22,343 --> 00:23:23,926
Must I?

296
00:23:23,928 --> 00:23:25,592
For better or worse.

297
00:23:25,594 --> 00:23:28,137
This truly falls into
the latter category.

298
00:23:28,139 --> 00:23:30,600
Depends how you look at it.

299
00:23:32,516 --> 00:23:34,602
Where's the blow dryer

300
00:23:35,603 --> 00:23:36,977
and my cardigan?

301
00:23:38,480 --> 00:23:42,441
You know these chairs
should have your names on 'em.

302
00:23:42,443 --> 00:23:45,984
You're up here sitting
in 'em so much.

303
00:23:45,986 --> 00:23:50,198
Your teacher asked you politely
to please remove the masks.

304
00:23:52,451 --> 00:23:53,327
Politely.

305
00:23:55,119 --> 00:23:56,704
Like a human being.

306
00:23:58,289 --> 00:24:01,789
Principal Dale, I'm
gonna take my lunch now.

307
00:24:01,791 --> 00:24:02,958
That's fine.

308
00:24:02,960 --> 00:24:05,125
Just let me know
when you get back.

309
00:24:05,127 --> 00:24:05,962
Okay.

310
00:24:08,129 --> 00:24:10,715
Did you see what I did there?

311
00:24:11,634 --> 00:24:13,468
That was being human.

312
00:24:24,143 --> 00:24:27,646
All right, you need
to remove your masks.

313
00:24:31,984 --> 00:24:33,318
Give 'em to me.

314
00:24:35,486 --> 00:24:36,986
I'll get 'em back to you
at the end of the day.

315
00:24:36,988 --> 00:24:37,986
No!

316
00:25:32,074 --> 00:25:34,202
Principal Dale.

317
00:25:54,887 --> 00:25:56,051
How much did all this cost?

318
00:25:56,053 --> 00:25:57,220
Not much.

319
00:25:57,222 --> 00:25:59,555
How much is not much?

320
00:25:59,557 --> 00:26:00,556
Not much is not much.

321
00:26:00,558 --> 00:26:03,225
Stop being a.

322
00:26:03,227 --> 00:26:04,892
I know not the
meaning of the word.

323
00:26:04,894 --> 00:26:07,561
Come now, let's get
busy before I have to

324
00:26:07,563 --> 00:26:11,314
rush off the hospital for a
night of charcoal feeding,

325
00:26:11,316 --> 00:26:15,069
alcohol abusing college cretins.

326
00:26:16,947 --> 00:26:17,903
Yeah.

327
00:26:17,905 --> 00:26:20,156
Jesus.

328
00:26:20,908 --> 00:26:22,908
What's wrong?

329
00:26:27,913 --> 00:26:29,748
Wow.

330
00:26:31,249 --> 00:26:32,959
Who the hell is that?

331
00:26:37,964 --> 00:26:41,008
The resident pederast.

332
00:26:42,301 --> 00:26:44,591
Are you kidding me?

333
00:26:44,593 --> 00:26:45,469
No.

334
00:26:46,637 --> 00:26:49,596
Our lovely neighbor, who I
assume is the resident busybody

335
00:26:49,598 --> 00:26:51,973
informed me of his
presence while you were out

336
00:26:51,975 --> 00:26:54,770
participating in
pumpkin palooza.

337
00:26:58,021 --> 00:27:01,105
Why is he just
standing there like that?

338
00:27:01,107 --> 00:27:03,941
I know not the minds
of sexual deviants.

339
00:27:03,943 --> 00:27:05,194
Hey, be kind.

340
00:27:06,113 --> 00:27:07,654
He may be reformed.

341
00:27:09,448 --> 00:27:11,159
I'll go talk to him.

342
00:27:17,788 --> 00:27:18,955
Hey there, buddy.

343
00:27:18,957 --> 00:27:21,290
Uh, my name is Robert.

344
00:27:21,292 --> 00:27:23,500
My wife, Ella, and I just
moved to the neighborhood.

345
00:27:26,629 --> 00:27:27,463
Okay.

346
00:27:28,840 --> 00:27:32,842
Hey, look I was just curious
why you were, you know,

347
00:27:34,177 --> 00:27:37,386
standing here in
front of my house.

348
00:27:37,388 --> 00:27:38,636
It's a free country.

349
00:27:38,638 --> 00:27:40,891
I can stand here if I want.

350
00:27:43,475 --> 00:27:44,685
Fair enough.

351
00:27:45,811 --> 00:27:49,229
Anyway, hey could you
do me a neighborly solid

352
00:27:49,231 --> 00:27:52,651
and you know, not
lecherously stand here?

353
00:27:54,486 --> 00:27:57,236
It's creeping my wife out.

354
00:27:57,238 --> 00:27:58,364
No problem.

355
00:27:59,699 --> 00:28:02,657
I don't wanna creep anybody
out, not on Halloween.

356
00:28:02,659 --> 00:28:04,200
There's enough
creepiness in the air.

357
00:28:04,202 --> 00:28:05,160
Yeah.

358
00:28:05,162 --> 00:28:06,497
Name's Samuel.

359
00:28:07,662 --> 00:28:10,997
You can just call me
the resident pederast.

360
00:28:10,999 --> 00:28:13,000
Everyone else seems to.

361
00:28:25,261 --> 00:28:28,678
Well, that sure as shit took
the piss out of my Halloween.

362
00:28:28,680 --> 00:28:30,180
What the hell happened?

363
00:28:30,182 --> 00:28:32,014
You need to keep your
voice down from now on, okay?

364
00:28:32,016 --> 00:28:34,017
What do you mean?

365
00:28:34,019 --> 00:28:35,769
I need to Clorox the
first layer of skin

366
00:28:35,771 --> 00:28:37,853
off my palm, forgive me.

367
00:28:37,855 --> 00:28:39,565
Are you mad at me?

368
00:28:41,359 --> 00:28:43,775
He heard what you
called him, Ella.

369
00:28:43,777 --> 00:28:45,192
What did I call him?

370
00:28:45,194 --> 00:28:46,528
The resident pederast.

371
00:28:46,530 --> 00:28:47,779
That's what he is.

372
00:28:47,781 --> 00:28:50,404
Be that as it
may, he's creepy,

373
00:28:50,406 --> 00:28:51,698
he lives across the street,

374
00:28:51,700 --> 00:28:53,700
and he's got an
alleged rap sheet.

375
00:28:53,702 --> 00:28:56,369
How the hell did he hear me?

376
00:28:56,371 --> 00:28:59,704
I didn't scream it and I
think there's enough space

377
00:28:59,706 --> 00:29:02,207
between our house and
where he's standing.

378
00:29:02,209 --> 00:29:04,042
I don't know and I don't care.

379
00:29:04,044 --> 00:29:07,710
All I'm saying is that
was super awkward,

380
00:29:07,712 --> 00:29:10,965
in a super awkward, throat cut
in the middle of the night,

381
00:29:10,967 --> 00:29:12,051
sort of way.

382
00:29:14,302 --> 00:29:15,802
I beseech you.

383
00:29:15,804 --> 00:29:18,053
Put on the guise of forward
thinking whenever that man

384
00:29:18,055 --> 00:29:19,888
is within earshot.

385
00:29:20,890 --> 00:29:22,640
Now, my palm burns.

386
00:29:22,642 --> 00:29:24,392
I'm sorry.

387
00:29:24,394 --> 00:29:26,394
I didn't think he could hear me.

388
00:29:26,396 --> 00:29:28,604
But, forgive me offending
someone with that kind

389
00:29:28,606 --> 00:29:30,481
of transgressive past
isn't gonna cause me

390
00:29:30,483 --> 00:29:33,232
to lose any sleep at night.

391
00:29:33,234 --> 00:29:35,402
And, that's not
what I care about.

392
00:29:35,404 --> 00:29:37,110
Call him whatever you
want on a piece of paper

393
00:29:37,112 --> 00:29:40,071
that'll end up in your
angry letter drawer,

394
00:29:40,073 --> 00:29:43,407
but when a human being may
be able to audibly pick up

395
00:29:43,409 --> 00:29:47,953
on your negative feelings,
I'm just saying be careful.

396
00:29:47,955 --> 00:29:51,331
I don't want him
hating us, hating you,

397
00:29:51,333 --> 00:29:54,668
and then acting on some
sort of nefarious impulses

398
00:29:54,670 --> 00:29:56,421
he may be harboring.

399
00:29:57,588 --> 00:30:01,174
Now, may I please carve
a God damn pumpkin?

400
00:30:03,927 --> 00:30:04,761
Please.

401
00:30:23,986 --> 00:30:25,110
Whoa.

402
00:32:21,958 --> 00:32:23,541
He's alive

403
00:32:23,543 --> 00:32:24,461
He's alive!

404
00:32:26,545 --> 00:32:28,212
All right, be
careful, psychopath.

405
00:32:28,214 --> 00:32:31,964
I have created the
perfect jack-o'-lantern.

406
00:32:31,966 --> 00:32:33,215
I'm so proud of you.

407
00:32:33,217 --> 00:32:34,718
Hey, I worked hard for this.

408
00:32:34,720 --> 00:32:38,389
Get off your ass and
come bask in the glory.

409
00:32:43,894 --> 00:32:47,729
What the hell is
that abomination?

410
00:32:47,731 --> 00:32:50,104
What, it's a
portrait of my grandpa.

411
00:32:50,106 --> 00:32:52,065
Okay, there are so many
things wrong with this.

412
00:32:52,067 --> 00:32:54,651
A, was your grandfather Hitler?

413
00:32:54,653 --> 00:32:56,569
And, B, why would
you carve a portrait,

414
00:32:56,571 --> 00:32:58,737
and I use the term
portrait very loosely,

415
00:32:58,739 --> 00:33:00,238
into a pumpkin?

416
00:33:00,240 --> 00:33:01,907
I have no idea how you
get Hitler from this.

417
00:33:01,909 --> 00:33:04,909
Just look at his mustache,
and his Jew-hating eyes.

418
00:33:04,911 --> 00:33:07,077
Those aren't Jew-hating eyes.

419
00:33:07,079 --> 00:33:09,245
Those are kindly old man eyes.

420
00:33:09,247 --> 00:33:11,081
Used to carve pumpkins
with my grandfather

421
00:33:11,083 --> 00:33:12,582
when I was a kid.

422
00:33:12,584 --> 00:33:14,583
That is adorable and the
perfect way to announce

423
00:33:14,585 --> 00:33:16,503
our anti-Semitism
to the neighborhood.

424
00:33:16,505 --> 00:33:19,463
All this work for nothing.

425
00:33:19,465 --> 00:33:21,423
All right, I gotta go
ready for my shift.

426
00:33:21,425 --> 00:33:23,759
Okay, but be cool about
what lights you turn on.

427
00:33:23,761 --> 00:33:25,801
I don't want anyone stopping
by expecting any treats

428
00:33:25,803 --> 00:33:27,177
of any sort.

429
00:33:27,179 --> 00:33:29,765
Yeah, yeah, lame-o.

430
00:34:05,461 --> 00:34:06,460
Shit.

431
00:34:07,713 --> 00:34:09,129
What the fuck?

432
00:34:09,131 --> 00:34:09,965
Jimmy.

433
00:34:13,969 --> 00:34:15,178
What the fuck?

434
00:34:40,657 --> 00:34:42,825
You can have it.

435
00:34:54,170 --> 00:34:55,500
Stop.

436
00:34:55,502 --> 00:34:57,335
Get away from me.

437
00:34:57,337 --> 00:34:58,214
No!

438
00:35:16,437 --> 00:35:17,271
Oh no!

439
00:35:26,278 --> 00:35:29,698
No, don't.

440
00:36:14,902 --> 00:36:15,736
Lights.

441
00:36:19,407 --> 00:36:22,075
Way to listen, husband of mine.

442
00:36:26,121 --> 00:36:26,996
Who is it?

443
00:36:28,998 --> 00:36:30,830
Trick or treat.

444
00:36:30,832 --> 00:36:33,290
Sorry, we
don't have any candy.

445
00:36:33,292 --> 00:36:35,084
Maybe next year.

446
00:37:02,608 --> 00:37:04,526
Jesus!

447
00:37:04,528 --> 00:37:05,776
Sorry.

448
00:37:05,778 --> 00:37:07,444
What the hell are
you doing out here?

449
00:37:07,446 --> 00:37:09,447
Disappointing children,
that's what I'm doing.

450
00:37:09,449 --> 00:37:10,656
Huh?

451
00:37:10,658 --> 00:37:12,490
Somebody knocked on the door.

452
00:37:12,492 --> 00:37:14,158
You left the light
on the stairs on.

453
00:37:14,160 --> 00:37:17,953
It doubles as a homing beacon
for candy-seeking munchkins.

454
00:37:17,955 --> 00:37:19,371
Well, what did
you expect me to do,

455
00:37:19,373 --> 00:37:22,708
stumble blindly up the stairs,
trip and fall to my death.

456
00:37:22,710 --> 00:37:25,292
Go back inside, scrubs,
it's cold out here.

457
00:37:25,294 --> 00:37:26,209
Why don't you wear a cardigan?

458
00:37:26,211 --> 00:37:27,838
Yeah, a cardigan.

459
00:37:52,734 --> 00:37:54,319
Oh, my Life Alert.

460
00:37:56,320 --> 00:37:58,405
Please don't fail me now.

461
00:38:14,668 --> 00:38:15,670
Look at you.

462
00:38:18,005 --> 00:38:18,838
Hello.

463
00:38:38,188 --> 00:38:41,691
The perfect mate.

464
00:38:43,359 --> 00:38:46,529
Smiley face, smiley
face, smiley face.

465
00:38:56,870 --> 00:38:59,205
You missed me, didn't you?

466
00:38:59,207 --> 00:39:00,205
Didn't you?

467
00:39:58,756 --> 00:40:00,757
Trick or treat.

468
00:40:01,924 --> 00:40:04,259
Don't you know,
I'm not allowed

469
00:40:04,261 --> 00:40:07,010
to celebrate Halloween anymore?

470
00:40:07,012 --> 00:40:08,096
Not legally.

471
00:40:09,599 --> 00:40:12,601
Ultra totalitarianism
at its finest.

472
00:40:16,270 --> 00:40:17,103
Yeah.

473
00:40:17,105 --> 00:40:18,270
Who the hell is it?

474
00:40:18,272 --> 00:40:19,604
Fucking
cunt, open the door.

475
00:40:19,606 --> 00:40:20,939
What the fuck.

476
00:40:20,941 --> 00:40:22,149
Open the door,
open the door let us in,

477
00:40:22,151 --> 00:40:24,360
let us in, trick or treat.

478
00:40:52,968 --> 00:40:54,302
Trick or treat.

479
00:41:03,977 --> 00:41:07,353
I don't know who
the fuck you are,

480
00:41:07,355 --> 00:41:11,065
but when I find you, I'm
gonna rip your fucking heart

481
00:41:11,067 --> 00:41:13,318
out of your fucking chest.

482
00:41:28,665 --> 00:41:29,499
Come on.

483
00:41:32,333 --> 00:41:33,501
What the fuck?

484
00:41:37,504 --> 00:41:38,506
Very funny.

485
00:41:39,841 --> 00:41:42,381
I used to pull that fucking
shit when I was a kid.

486
00:41:42,383 --> 00:41:45,679
But, the best trick
is when you take...

487
00:41:50,850 --> 00:41:52,518
What, what the fuck?

488
00:41:54,519 --> 00:41:57,352
How 'bout a
little fire, Scarecrow?

489
00:41:57,354 --> 00:41:58,354
You're a fucking psycho.

490
00:42:05,029 --> 00:42:06,694
You're fucking hilarious.

491
00:42:06,696 --> 00:42:09,531
Now, get the fuck
out of my house.

492
00:42:12,534 --> 00:42:15,954
Or, on second thought,
maybe stick around

493
00:42:17,121 --> 00:42:18,872
and maybe we can see

494
00:42:19,707 --> 00:42:21,372
what's under this mask.

495
00:42:24,710 --> 00:42:26,378
Bend, bend.

496
00:42:31,924 --> 00:42:33,799
Silly rabbit.

497
00:42:33,801 --> 00:42:35,553
Tricks are for kids.

498
00:42:36,720 --> 00:42:39,930
All right, lock all
the doors and windows

499
00:42:39,932 --> 00:42:41,890
and all that jazz.

500
00:42:41,892 --> 00:42:44,308
See, you in the morning.

501
00:42:44,310 --> 00:42:45,893
You look pensive.

502
00:42:45,895 --> 00:42:47,103
I am pensive.

503
00:42:47,105 --> 00:42:49,229
Why are you pensive?

504
00:42:49,231 --> 00:42:52,483
I'm just a little
freaked out, Robert.

505
00:42:52,485 --> 00:42:53,401
Why?

506
00:42:54,569 --> 00:42:56,152
I don't know.

507
00:42:56,154 --> 00:42:59,447
I'm going to be home
alone, in a new house,

508
00:42:59,449 --> 00:43:03,575
in a new town, on Halloween
and you're going to work.

509
00:43:03,577 --> 00:43:06,159
That's why I told you to
lock all the doors and windows.

510
00:43:06,161 --> 00:43:07,827
We live next
door to a pedophile.

511
00:43:07,829 --> 00:43:10,998
Well, you're no
his type, obviously.

512
00:43:11,000 --> 00:43:12,082
Is that funny?

513
00:43:12,084 --> 00:43:13,165
It's a little funny.

514
00:43:13,167 --> 00:43:15,834
It's not funny at all.

515
00:43:15,836 --> 00:43:19,921
Look, nothing is
going to happen, okay?

516
00:43:19,923 --> 00:43:22,423
Today you were so mad at
me because I opened my mouth

517
00:43:22,425 --> 00:43:25,009
and that nasty guy heard
me and now you're saying

518
00:43:25,011 --> 00:43:26,761
everything is gonna be okay.

519
00:43:26,763 --> 00:43:29,263
The hospital's a
couple miles away.

520
00:43:29,265 --> 00:43:31,097
I have my phone on me and
if there's an emergency,

521
00:43:31,099 --> 00:43:33,974
I can be home in
10 seconds flat.

522
00:43:33,976 --> 00:43:37,104
Fine, but it's
not 10 seconds flat.

523
00:43:39,272 --> 00:43:42,358
Fine, it's totally
10 seconds flat.

524
00:43:44,945 --> 00:43:46,443
Fine.

525
00:43:46,445 --> 00:43:47,947
Happy Halloween.

526
00:43:52,618 --> 00:43:53,786
I hate you.

527
00:43:54,660 --> 00:43:56,204
I love you, too.

528
00:44:22,977 --> 00:44:25,519
It's too late, shop's closed.

529
00:44:31,149 --> 00:44:33,817
There is no more candy.

530
00:44:33,819 --> 00:44:35,902
Come back next year.

531
00:44:35,904 --> 00:44:37,155
Little cretins.

532
00:45:07,764 --> 00:45:11,222
What the fuck are you
doing in my house?

533
00:45:11,224 --> 00:45:13,602
Get the fuck outta my house.

534
00:45:33,242 --> 00:45:35,619
You poor bastard.

535
00:45:35,621 --> 00:45:37,619
Great night to have your first.

536
00:45:37,621 --> 00:45:39,371
You're telling me.

537
00:45:39,373 --> 00:45:40,580
If I have to pump
anymore charcoal tonight,

538
00:45:40,582 --> 00:45:42,247
I swear to God,
I'm gonna lose it.

539
00:45:51,092 --> 00:45:52,382
Is there any coffee
in this place?

540
00:45:52,384 --> 00:45:54,968
Um, you know, I would
check in the break room

541
00:45:54,970 --> 00:45:56,551
where coffee usually lives.

542
00:45:56,553 --> 00:45:57,386
All right.

543
00:45:57,388 --> 00:45:58,303
Yeah, yeah.

544
00:45:58,305 --> 00:45:59,887
What's your name by the way.

545
00:45:59,889 --> 00:46:00,889
Robert.

546
00:46:00,891 --> 00:46:01,764
Macy.

547
00:46:01,766 --> 00:46:02,891
Good luck.

548
00:46:02,893 --> 00:46:03,769
Thanks.

549
00:46:43,676 --> 00:46:45,259
Hey Mom.

550
00:46:45,261 --> 00:46:47,011
Happy Halloween, honey.

551
00:46:47,013 --> 00:46:49,097
Yeah, Happy Halloween.

552
00:46:51,599 --> 00:46:52,765
Where are you?

553
00:46:52,767 --> 00:46:55,018
Your father
and I are at a party.

554
00:46:55,020 --> 00:46:56,101
So, you're smashed.

555
00:46:56,103 --> 00:46:57,603
I'm not smashed.

556
00:46:57,605 --> 00:46:58,771
I am your mother.

557
00:46:58,773 --> 00:47:00,272
I most assuredly do not...

558
00:47:00,274 --> 00:47:03,607
You're my mother, so you
most assuredly are smashed.

559
00:47:03,609 --> 00:47:05,109
I resent that.

560
00:47:05,111 --> 00:47:07,945
To what do I owe the honor
of this telephonic reach out?

561
00:47:07,947 --> 00:47:10,114
Just saying hi
and Happy Halloween.

562
00:47:10,116 --> 00:47:12,656
Well, hi and Happy Halloween.

563
00:47:12,658 --> 00:47:14,283
Am I annoying you?

564
00:47:14,285 --> 00:47:16,620
No, no you're not.

565
00:47:16,622 --> 00:47:18,287
You sound distant.

566
00:47:18,289 --> 00:47:21,624
I'm just watching a
movie and unpacking.

567
00:47:21,626 --> 00:47:22,458
Oh, yeah?

568
00:47:22,460 --> 00:47:24,125
How is that going?

569
00:47:24,127 --> 00:47:25,460
Fantastic.

570
00:47:28,547 --> 00:47:30,881
Can I call you later?

571
00:47:30,883 --> 00:47:32,298
There's somebody at the door.

572
00:47:32,300 --> 00:47:33,466
Of course there is.

573
00:47:33,468 --> 00:47:34,843
It's Halloween.

574
00:47:34,845 --> 00:47:38,721
I know, but I'm not really
celebrating this year.

575
00:47:38,723 --> 00:47:39,971
Can I call you back?

576
00:47:39,973 --> 00:47:41,473
Are you actually
gonna call me back?

577
00:47:41,475 --> 00:47:42,475
Yes, bye.

578
00:48:00,199 --> 00:48:01,075
Wow, God.

579
00:48:01,991 --> 00:48:04,909
When I was a kid, I took a hint.

580
00:48:06,578 --> 00:48:07,497
Fuck this.

581
00:48:09,040 --> 00:48:09,916
Who is it?

582
00:48:13,501 --> 00:48:14,668
Trick or treat.

583
00:48:20,674 --> 00:48:23,676
Look, I don't have any candy.

584
00:48:23,678 --> 00:48:25,175
I don't have treats of any kind.

585
00:48:25,177 --> 00:48:29,680
No pennies, no rotten apples,
no razor blades, nothing.

586
00:48:29,682 --> 00:48:32,683
Like, come back next year.

587
00:48:32,685 --> 00:48:33,518
Sorry.

588
00:48:42,192 --> 00:48:43,860
Did you not hear me?

589
00:48:48,030 --> 00:48:48,906
Go away.

590
00:49:59,591 --> 00:50:02,423
Hello, you've
reached Robert's cell.

591
00:50:02,425 --> 00:50:07,093
Leave a message at the tone
or at the beep or whatever.

592
00:50:07,095 --> 00:50:08,931
I'm, this is terrible.

593
00:50:09,765 --> 00:50:11,098
Please leave a message.

594
00:50:11,100 --> 00:50:11,972
Thanks for the effort.

595
00:50:12,809 --> 00:50:14,019
Hi, it's me.

596
00:50:17,606 --> 00:50:19,187
I know it's your
first day of work.

597
00:50:19,189 --> 00:50:20,774
I understand that.

598
00:50:23,444 --> 00:50:24,778
But, I'm scared.

599
00:50:26,528 --> 00:50:30,447
If you could just do me a
favor and give me a call back

600
00:50:30,449 --> 00:50:32,616
when you get a chance.

601
00:50:32,618 --> 00:50:37,452
One of those calming, there's
nothing to be afraid of,

602
00:50:37,454 --> 00:50:38,872
reassuring calls.

603
00:50:40,832 --> 00:50:42,708
I could really use it.

604
00:50:44,670 --> 00:50:45,628
I love you.

605
00:51:00,807 --> 00:51:02,850
You're going crazy, Ella.

606
00:51:04,979 --> 00:51:06,521
You're going crazy.

607
00:51:24,160 --> 00:51:26,413
You're going fucking crazy.

608
00:51:54,852 --> 00:51:55,729
Is that it?

609
00:51:57,187 --> 00:51:58,562
Is that all you got?

610
00:52:07,779 --> 00:52:08,698
Hello.

611
00:52:12,700 --> 00:52:13,911
Who's in here?

612
00:54:16,304 --> 00:54:17,138
Fuck!

613
00:54:25,352 --> 00:54:26,229
Stop it!

614
00:55:23,193 --> 00:55:24,026
Oh fuck!

615
00:55:25,237 --> 00:55:26,694
Fuck!

616
00:55:42,042 --> 00:55:43,207
Who the fuck are you?

617
00:55:43,209 --> 00:55:46,379
Why the fuck are you
doing this to me?

618
00:55:48,880 --> 00:55:53,094
Trick or
treat.

619
00:56:17,904 --> 00:56:20,240
I can hear you breathing.

620
00:56:32,125 --> 00:56:36,336
Trick or
treat.

621
00:56:45,177 --> 00:56:47,636
Your emergency
call is now being dialed.

622
00:56:47,638 --> 00:56:50,638
Please stand by.

623
00:56:53,102 --> 00:56:54,267
Clear the area.

624
00:56:54,269 --> 00:56:55,851
Clear the room.

625
00:56:55,853 --> 00:56:58,604
Multiple stab wounds.

626
00:56:59,439 --> 00:57:00,272
Hold on.

627
00:57:00,274 --> 00:57:02,107
Get an IV started.

628
00:57:17,287 --> 00:57:19,120
I gotta call my wife.

629
00:57:19,122 --> 00:57:21,499
Where are you going?

630
00:57:44,352 --> 00:57:46,479
Come on, Ella, pick up.

631
00:57:47,813 --> 00:57:48,689
Come on.

632
00:57:50,733 --> 00:57:52,485
Clear your voicemail.

633
00:58:02,659 --> 00:58:05,201
Hey, what happened?

634
00:58:05,203 --> 00:58:06,034
I'm sorry.

635
00:58:06,036 --> 00:58:07,494
I know that guy.

636
00:58:07,496 --> 00:58:10,163
Yeah, we all know that guy.

637
00:58:10,165 --> 00:58:12,832
He lives across
the street from us.

638
00:58:12,834 --> 00:58:15,334
He scared my wife and I
just got a message from her

639
00:58:15,336 --> 00:58:17,335
saying she was scared.

640
00:58:17,337 --> 00:58:20,089
Oh, she's scared
on Halloween night.

641
00:58:20,091 --> 00:58:21,342
How surprising.

642
00:58:22,717 --> 00:58:24,216
Look, I thought your
sarcasm was funny before,

643
00:58:24,218 --> 00:58:26,176
and believe me, I'm the
reigning king of sarcasm,

644
00:58:26,178 --> 00:58:29,179
but right now, it's not helping.

645
00:58:29,181 --> 00:58:31,597
Look, did you see the
thing around his throat?

646
00:58:31,599 --> 00:58:33,058
What?

647
00:58:33,060 --> 00:58:35,183
The thing that looks
like a garage door opener.

648
00:58:35,185 --> 00:58:36,185
Yeah.

649
00:58:36,187 --> 00:58:37,060
It's called Life Alert.

650
00:58:37,062 --> 00:58:38,937
Geriatrics usually wear it.

651
00:58:38,939 --> 00:58:41,022
If they fall and break a
hip, they can press a button

652
00:58:41,024 --> 00:58:44,358
that alerts us to
come help them.

653
00:58:44,360 --> 00:58:46,862
Sometimes people who get
themselves in a lot of trouble

654
00:58:46,864 --> 00:58:48,571
wear them as well.

655
00:58:48,573 --> 00:58:49,737
Like Samuel.

656
00:58:49,739 --> 00:58:51,239
Trying to calm me down?

657
00:58:51,241 --> 00:58:56,035
I'm trying to
get you to think rationally.

658
00:58:56,037 --> 00:58:59,705
The law of probability says
that, yes, your wife's scared.

659
00:58:59,707 --> 00:59:02,373
She's home alone,
but she's not cut up

660
00:59:02,375 --> 00:59:04,083
into a million pieces.

661
00:59:13,719 --> 00:59:17,886
At home, shit like this
would happen all the time.

662
00:59:17,888 --> 00:59:19,972
Thought moving here,
getting out of L.A.

663
00:59:19,974 --> 00:59:22,392
would make it easier, but...

664
00:59:24,811 --> 00:59:26,229
We lost a child.

665
00:59:30,064 --> 00:59:31,482
We were so happy.

666
00:59:33,736 --> 00:59:36,570
Freshly married,
freshly parents.

667
00:59:39,239 --> 00:59:43,117
The most beautiful baby
girl you've ever seen.

668
00:59:43,952 --> 00:59:45,578
She wasn't healthy.

669
00:59:48,164 --> 00:59:52,418
We didn't know until one
morning she wasn't breathing.

670
00:59:55,337 --> 00:59:57,756
She had passed in the night.

671
00:59:59,088 --> 01:00:00,421
What was her name?

672
01:00:00,423 --> 01:00:01,300
Melissa.

673
01:00:22,275 --> 01:00:23,151
Fuck it.

674
01:00:40,457 --> 01:00:43,125
Can you talk to me for a second?

675
01:00:47,296 --> 01:00:48,464
Are you there?

676
01:00:51,843 --> 01:00:53,131
Oh God damn it.

677
01:00:53,133 --> 01:00:56,054
If you're there
can you just knock?

678
01:01:14,069 --> 01:01:17,155
Okay, all right,
thank you for that.

679
01:01:22,868 --> 01:01:24,661
What did I do to you?

680
01:01:26,036 --> 01:01:27,997
Why are you doing this?

681
01:01:33,002 --> 01:01:37,046
Can you just answer those
two questions, please?

682
01:01:39,382 --> 01:01:41,424
Don't I deserve to know?

683
01:01:48,014 --> 01:01:48,847
Okay.

684
01:01:52,559 --> 01:01:55,187
Well, if I'm going to die here,

685
01:01:57,105 --> 01:01:59,857
which it seems
like I'm going to.

686
01:02:01,901 --> 01:02:04,778
You're gonna kill
me, both of you.

687
01:02:11,033 --> 01:02:15,204
If that's the case, can you
just answer me one question?

688
01:02:17,246 --> 01:02:20,958
Not why you're here or
what did I do to you?

689
01:02:23,459 --> 01:02:25,753
But, just another question?

690
01:02:34,552 --> 01:02:35,761
Okay.

691
01:02:38,890 --> 01:02:40,433
How old are you?

692
01:02:43,393 --> 01:02:45,101
How old are both of you?

693
01:02:45,103 --> 01:02:46,394
Five.

694
01:02:46,396 --> 01:02:47,228
Seven.

695
01:02:47,230 --> 01:02:48,228
32.

696
01:02:48,230 --> 01:02:49,395
56.

697
01:02:49,397 --> 01:02:50,397
13.

698
01:02:50,399 --> 01:02:52,065
46.

699
01:02:52,067 --> 01:02:53,106
34.

700
01:02:53,108 --> 01:02:54,566
600.

701
01:02:54,568 --> 01:02:55,401
16.

702
01:02:55,403 --> 01:02:57,111
40.

703
01:02:57,113 --> 01:02:58,320
142.

704
01:02:58,322 --> 01:02:59,904
147.

705
01:02:59,906 --> 01:03:00,949
67.

706
01:03:02,076 --> 01:03:03,616
Two.

707
01:03:03,618 --> 01:03:05,325
101.

708
01:03:05,327 --> 01:03:06,160
Four.

709
01:03:06,162 --> 01:03:08,079
100.

710
01:03:08,081 --> 01:03:09,164
100.

711
01:03:11,415 --> 01:03:12,833
14.

712
01:03:12,835 --> 01:03:13,918
14.

713
01:03:29,013 --> 01:03:33,100
She was our world
for that short time.

714
01:03:33,102 --> 01:03:35,769
My wife, Ella, it hit her hard.

715
01:03:38,438 --> 01:03:40,106
I mean, it hit me hard,

716
01:03:40,108 --> 01:03:42,860
but I didn't wanna
lose her, too.

717
01:03:45,611 --> 01:03:47,278
You know that happens so often.

718
01:03:47,280 --> 01:03:52,157
You lose a child and then
your marriage falls apart.

719
01:03:52,159 --> 01:03:56,370
Better worse, in all honesty,
but I couldn't lose her,

720
01:03:58,498 --> 01:03:59,790
I just couldn't.

721
01:04:01,624 --> 01:04:03,624
Losing my daughter destroyed me,

722
01:04:03,626 --> 01:04:05,544
but I had to be strong.

723
01:04:07,630 --> 01:04:09,340
I have to be strong.

724
01:04:11,633 --> 01:04:14,133
My wife, she's a teacher.

725
01:04:14,135 --> 01:04:15,470
She loves kids.

726
01:04:16,555 --> 01:04:20,306
She was so happy when
Melissa was born.

727
01:04:20,308 --> 01:04:23,308
And, I mean, it was a
hellish labor process too.

728
01:04:23,310 --> 01:04:27,479
But, she seemed to
revel in it, you know.

729
01:04:27,481 --> 01:04:31,233
As if she could see
with, as if she could see

730
01:04:32,400 --> 01:04:36,152
in her heart what was at
the end of the rainbow.

731
01:04:36,154 --> 01:04:39,237
This perfect amalgamation
of her and I.

732
01:04:39,239 --> 01:04:40,158
Our child.

733
01:04:44,202 --> 01:04:46,662
I don't know how she does it.

734
01:04:47,830 --> 01:04:50,080
She's got a job at the
local middle school.

735
01:04:50,082 --> 01:04:52,876
She's jumping back
on the saddle.

736
01:04:55,586 --> 01:04:58,340
I can't imagine
what that's like.

737
01:04:59,839 --> 01:05:03,426
Being a mother for so
short a time and then

738
01:05:04,552 --> 01:05:07,847
having to be around
kids five days a week.

739
01:05:08,680 --> 01:05:10,224
I just don't know.

740
01:05:13,351 --> 01:05:15,018
I like you, Robert.

741
01:05:15,020 --> 01:05:17,185
I'm glad you're here.

742
01:05:17,187 --> 01:05:18,604
And, I hate everyone.

743
01:05:19,856 --> 01:05:23,358
I hate the doctors,
the nursing staff.

744
01:05:23,360 --> 01:05:26,195
Actually, I hate
the entire town.

745
01:05:27,905 --> 01:05:30,115
Everyone's just so boring.

746
01:05:31,575 --> 01:05:34,869
Yeah, can
tell that already.

747
01:05:35,954 --> 01:05:38,287
Go be with your wife.

748
01:05:38,289 --> 01:05:42,373
No, you're right,
it's probably nothing.

749
01:05:42,375 --> 01:05:44,083
Go home to your wife.

750
01:05:44,085 --> 01:05:46,460
I'll cover for you.

751
01:05:46,462 --> 01:05:48,753
It's still Halloween.

752
01:05:48,755 --> 01:05:51,048
It's far past
Halloween at this point.

753
01:05:51,050 --> 01:05:52,552
Technicalities.

754
01:05:58,805 --> 01:06:00,265
Happy Halloween.

755
01:06:01,724 --> 01:06:02,559
Thank you.

756
01:08:42,400 --> 01:08:43,943
Honey, I'm home.

757
01:08:47,447 --> 01:08:48,364
Ella.

758
01:08:54,536 --> 01:08:56,037
Oh, Jesus Christ.

759
01:08:58,748 --> 01:08:59,540
Oh my God.

760
01:09:01,124 --> 01:09:02,041
Ella!

761
01:09:14,636 --> 01:09:16,054
Where's my wife?

762
01:09:19,557 --> 01:09:20,892
Where's my wife?

763
01:10:48,130 --> 01:10:49,464
Just kill me.

764
01:10:55,220 --> 01:10:57,638
That's what you want, right?

765
01:11:00,808 --> 01:11:03,474
That's why you're doing this,

766
01:11:03,476 --> 01:11:06,312
because I didn't
answer the door.

767
01:11:07,897 --> 01:11:11,483
Because I didn't give
you a fucking treat.

768
01:11:15,821 --> 01:11:18,156
And, so you kill my husband.

769
01:11:24,661 --> 01:11:25,828
Just kill me.

770
01:11:33,669 --> 01:11:34,501
Wait.

771
01:13:56,620 --> 01:13:59,662
Uh, I fucking hate Halloween.

772
01:13:59,664 --> 01:14:03,625
I told you being a sexy
was a stupid idea.

773
01:14:03,627 --> 01:14:05,295
I look ugly and fat.

774
01:14:06,962 --> 01:14:09,714
Nothing good ever happens
on Halloween ever.

775
01:14:09,716 --> 01:14:13,299
In fact, mostly bad things
happen on Halloween.

776
01:14:13,301 --> 01:14:16,342
I'm so fat, I just
wanna eat chocolate.

777
01:14:16,344 --> 01:14:17,302
But, I can't have any chocolate

778
01:14:17,304 --> 01:14:18,804
because then I'll get fatter.

779
01:14:18,806 --> 01:14:22,808
Wait, you don't
know what happened here?

780
01:14:27,356 --> 01:14:28,312
Here?

781
01:14:28,314 --> 01:14:29,648
Like here, here?

782
01:14:30,483 --> 01:14:32,150
She doesn't know.

783
01:14:33,069 --> 01:14:35,817
Wait, something happened here.

784
01:14:35,819 --> 01:14:38,071
And I assume whatever
the something is,

785
01:14:38,073 --> 01:14:39,532
is something bad.

786
01:14:40,741 --> 01:14:42,574
Something happened
here and neither of you

787
01:14:42,576 --> 01:14:45,159
until this moment have
felt the need to tell me?

788
01:14:45,161 --> 01:14:47,578
Well, count us as
shitty friends then.

789
01:14:47,580 --> 01:14:51,164
But, is Halloween night, so I
guess we should tell you now.

790
01:14:51,166 --> 01:14:53,332
That's great, tell her now.

791
01:14:53,334 --> 01:14:54,751
I hate you guys.

792
01:14:54,753 --> 01:14:56,169
I would say stop if
you've heard this before,

793
01:14:56,171 --> 01:14:57,754
but we've already
established that you haven't,

794
01:14:57,756 --> 01:14:59,504
so I'm just gonna run my mouth.

795
01:14:59,506 --> 01:15:02,342
Run it, run it,
run it, run it.

796
01:15:03,677 --> 01:15:06,218
Okay, I get to
tell a ghost story.

797
01:15:06,220 --> 01:15:07,429
I am so amped.

798
01:15:15,187 --> 01:15:16,351
It was Halloween night.

799
01:15:18,064 --> 01:15:19,020
What?

800
01:15:19,022 --> 01:15:21,357
Shut up, I'm having fun.

801
01:15:21,359 --> 01:15:23,023
You guys are
literally the worst.

802
01:15:23,025 --> 01:15:25,192
Go on, I'll be a good girl.

803
01:15:25,194 --> 01:15:26,570
Thank you cuz.

804
01:15:28,698 --> 01:15:30,364
It was Halloween night.

805
01:15:30,366 --> 01:15:31,906
15 years ago.

806
01:15:31,908 --> 01:15:32,907
Was it?

807
01:15:32,909 --> 01:15:34,283
Doesn't seem like that long ago.

808
01:15:34,285 --> 01:15:35,534
It was forever ago.

809
01:15:35,536 --> 01:15:37,203
Well, the first part was.

810
01:15:37,205 --> 01:15:38,245
The second
part was last year.

811
01:15:38,247 --> 01:15:39,247
Guys.

812
01:15:39,249 --> 01:15:40,374
Okay, okay.

813
01:15:41,749 --> 01:15:44,126
It was Halloween night
and there was this woman.

814
01:15:44,128 --> 01:15:46,710
She was knocked up
to hell and back.

815
01:15:46,712 --> 01:15:48,920
Oh my God, like you!

816
01:15:48,922 --> 01:15:52,049
There are no words for
how annoyed I'm getting.

817
01:15:52,051 --> 01:15:53,883
Well, this pregnant bitch...

818
01:15:53,885 --> 01:15:55,259
Why do you have to be so ugly?

819
01:15:55,261 --> 01:15:57,137
Fine, pregnant broad.

820
01:15:57,139 --> 01:15:58,221
Thank you.

821
01:16:00,558 --> 01:16:02,432
This pregnant
broad, she was dating

822
01:16:02,434 --> 01:16:04,559
this total piece of shit.

823
01:16:04,561 --> 01:16:06,144
You guys remember
my cousin Trish?

824
01:16:06,146 --> 01:16:07,561
Who doesn't know Trish?

825
01:16:07,563 --> 01:16:09,939
Every throbbing cock
in town knows Trish.

826
01:16:09,941 --> 01:16:11,064
Yeah, yeah.

827
01:16:11,066 --> 01:16:11,900
Go on.

828
01:16:13,235 --> 01:16:17,071
This Katy dude, my cousin
Trish, she knows him.

829
01:16:19,073 --> 01:16:21,743
Well, knew him, for that matter.

830
01:16:23,076 --> 01:16:24,993
He used to frequent
Barney's, that piece of shit

831
01:16:24,995 --> 01:16:28,453
along the wall, pseudo
dive bar at the.

832
01:16:28,455 --> 01:16:31,164
And, this happened
when she sees the dude,

833
01:16:31,166 --> 01:16:33,084
well he knocked her up.

834
01:16:34,585 --> 01:16:38,255
But, this chick, well, he was
abusive, total piece of shit.

835
01:16:40,008 --> 01:16:44,593
Verbal meets physical and
this grand perfect storm

836
01:16:44,595 --> 01:16:46,429
of fuck you machismo.

837
01:16:48,805 --> 01:16:52,433
Well she gets wise and
she leaves the dude.

838
01:16:53,809 --> 01:16:57,686
But, she's already attached
to this burgeoning vermin

839
01:16:57,688 --> 01:16:58,520
inside of her.

840
01:16:58,522 --> 01:16:59,771
Like she's so excited.

841
01:16:59,773 --> 01:17:02,440
She always wanted
to be a mother.

842
01:17:02,442 --> 01:17:06,109
Forget the sperm sprayer who
put the two kids inside of her.

843
01:17:06,111 --> 01:17:08,112
Wait, twins?

844
01:17:12,033 --> 01:17:14,867
You are the worst
storyteller ever.

845
01:17:14,869 --> 01:17:16,619
Fuck and you.

846
01:17:16,621 --> 01:17:17,619
What do you mean?

847
01:17:17,621 --> 01:17:19,120
I am a great storyteller.

848
01:17:19,122 --> 01:17:20,455
No you're not.

849
01:17:20,457 --> 01:17:23,624
Spoiler alert, that
the kids are twins.

850
01:17:23,626 --> 01:17:25,543
You might as well just
tell the audience...

851
01:17:25,545 --> 01:17:29,296
Okay, guys, I'm kinda freaked
out by this whole thing.

852
01:17:29,298 --> 01:17:32,341
Apparently something horrible
happened in the house

853
01:17:32,343 --> 01:17:36,219
in which I dwell and
my two best friends

854
01:17:36,221 --> 01:17:39,805
decided not to tell me
until I moved my ass in.

855
01:17:39,807 --> 01:17:43,057
So, if you could finish the
rest of the story, please.

856
01:17:43,059 --> 01:17:44,809
They were twins.

857
01:17:44,811 --> 01:17:45,645
Are.

858
01:17:46,813 --> 01:17:49,396
Who's ruining the
story now, bitch?

859
01:17:49,398 --> 01:17:52,023
Sorry, go on.

860
01:17:52,025 --> 01:17:54,818
This skeezy dude, he's
spurned because she dropped

861
01:17:54,820 --> 01:17:57,153
the mother fucker
like a bad habit.

862
01:17:57,155 --> 01:17:58,487
Girl power.

863
01:17:58,489 --> 01:18:00,154
Well, she started
dating another buck.

864
01:18:00,156 --> 01:18:01,033
Nice guy.

865
01:18:02,325 --> 01:18:06,494
But, still on the low proverbial
end of the higher class.

866
01:18:06,496 --> 01:18:08,373
But, still a nice guy.

867
01:18:09,832 --> 01:18:12,999
Well, this guy, man,
he can't take it,

868
01:18:13,001 --> 01:18:15,209
her running around
with this new beau

869
01:18:15,211 --> 01:18:17,336
while carrying his kids.

870
01:18:17,338 --> 01:18:18,921
No!

871
01:18:18,923 --> 01:18:19,840
No, sir.

872
01:18:22,843 --> 01:18:24,591
And, one Halloween night.

873
01:18:24,593 --> 01:18:26,552
15 years ago.

874
01:18:26,554 --> 01:18:27,513
He snaps.

875
01:18:30,391 --> 01:18:34,602
And, he stabs her in the belly
right here in this kitchen.

876
01:18:38,689 --> 01:18:40,689
Are you fucking kidding me?

877
01:18:40,691 --> 01:18:41,690
He stabbed her seven times.

878
01:18:41,692 --> 01:18:42,524
Six.

879
01:18:42,526 --> 01:18:43,400
It was seven.

880
01:18:43,402 --> 01:18:44,359
I promise you it was six.

881
01:18:44,361 --> 01:18:46,027
I swear to you it was seven.

882
01:18:46,029 --> 01:18:46,944
Google.

883
01:18:46,946 --> 01:18:48,863
Okay, guys, please.

884
01:18:48,865 --> 01:18:52,573
I'm kinda freaked out by
this whole thing right now.

885
01:18:52,575 --> 01:18:56,788
I don't care if it was six
or seven or 12 or 30 times.

886
01:18:58,204 --> 01:19:02,540
A pregnant woman, pregnant,
got stabbed in my kitchen?

887
01:19:02,542 --> 01:19:03,875
Yeah.

888
01:19:03,877 --> 01:19:06,627
Okay, never mind you
worthless slags not telling me,

889
01:19:06,629 --> 01:19:08,463
but shouldn't my landlord?

890
01:19:08,465 --> 01:19:10,380
I mean, God, this is something
they're supposed to reveal

891
01:19:10,382 --> 01:19:11,715
at some point, right?

892
01:19:11,717 --> 01:19:14,635
Well, yes and
no, but it just depends.

893
01:19:14,637 --> 01:19:16,635
That's the end of the story.

894
01:19:16,637 --> 01:19:17,554
She dies.

895
01:19:18,597 --> 01:19:19,930
I bet.

896
01:19:19,932 --> 01:19:21,892
But, the kids didn't.

897
01:19:23,894 --> 01:19:26,562
14 years later, those two girls,

898
01:19:28,939 --> 01:19:30,650
those twins of evil,

899
01:19:32,275 --> 01:19:35,487
those bad apples
born out of violence,

900
01:19:36,403 --> 01:19:38,988
they took to the streets,

901
01:19:38,990 --> 01:19:42,239
one Halloween night years ago.

902
01:19:42,241 --> 01:19:44,408
Lord knows why they
chose that year.

903
01:19:44,410 --> 01:19:46,077
You're talking about now.

904
01:19:46,079 --> 01:19:48,078
It was the same year
as you moved to town, no.

905
01:19:48,080 --> 01:19:51,247
How did I not know about this?

906
01:19:51,249 --> 01:19:55,585
They start going door to
door knocking arbitrarily.

907
01:19:55,587 --> 01:19:58,419
No rhyme, no fucking reason.

908
01:19:58,421 --> 01:20:00,129
But, if you weren't celebrating,

909
01:20:00,131 --> 01:20:03,925
if you didn't have
your lights on, oh man,

910
01:20:03,927 --> 01:20:05,592
did they have a treat for you.

911
01:20:05,594 --> 01:20:07,595
Technically tricks really.

912
01:20:07,597 --> 01:20:09,764
They killed a pedophile.

913
01:20:09,766 --> 01:20:11,264
You know the one that
did the little draws kids

914
01:20:11,266 --> 01:20:12,265
waiting to the area.

915
01:20:12,267 --> 01:20:13,934
Oh, those poor little angels.

916
01:20:13,936 --> 01:20:16,352
Good riddance to the
bad rubbish on that guy.

917
01:20:16,354 --> 01:20:18,437
They kill a
trailer trash broad.

918
01:20:18,439 --> 01:20:19,691
Some old chick.

919
01:20:21,109 --> 01:20:24,820
But, the really sad one, was
this teacher gal's husband.

920
01:20:26,446 --> 01:20:28,654
They kept her alive to deal with

921
01:20:28,656 --> 01:20:31,033
all the pain and the misery.

922
01:20:32,283 --> 01:20:34,951
Yeah, I see, I figured
you were aware of this.

923
01:20:34,953 --> 01:20:37,287
This is some really
fucked up shit.

924
01:20:37,289 --> 01:20:38,787
Those two brats,
they totally cut...

925
01:20:38,789 --> 01:20:39,623
No!

926
01:20:40,708 --> 01:20:41,625
No.

927
01:20:42,501 --> 01:20:44,667
That's the best part.

928
01:20:44,669 --> 01:20:46,045
This is my time.

929
01:20:47,171 --> 01:20:49,296
Fine, go ahead then.

930
01:20:49,298 --> 01:20:51,466
Those two little brats,

931
01:20:52,800 --> 01:20:54,467
they carved into his chest

932
01:20:54,469 --> 01:20:56,638
a fucking jack-o'-lantern.

933
01:20:57,972 --> 01:20:59,305
I have to fucking
show you the pictures.

934
01:20:59,307 --> 01:21:00,639
akumenang.com

935
01:21:00,641 --> 01:21:01,472
Really?

936
01:21:01,474 --> 01:21:02,307
I'll look it up.

937
01:21:02,309 --> 01:21:03,475
Google it, bitch.

938
01:21:03,477 --> 01:21:04,975
Guys, I don't wanna
hear this anymore.

939
01:21:04,977 --> 01:21:09,147
I know that I said the
male entry was the best part.

940
01:21:09,149 --> 01:21:10,149
But, really,

941
01:21:11,566 --> 01:21:13,985
this, this is the best part.

942
01:21:18,573 --> 01:21:22,324
Those two bad bitches,
they're still alive.

943
01:21:22,326 --> 01:21:23,824
What?

944
01:21:23,826 --> 01:21:26,244
See, that's
the part I don't believe.

945
01:21:26,246 --> 01:21:28,328
What, it's true.

946
01:21:28,330 --> 01:21:30,497
They never found
the bodies, I swear.

947
01:21:30,499 --> 01:21:32,543
Okay, ladies, I'm done.

948
01:21:33,502 --> 01:21:34,834
It's time for bed.

949
01:21:34,836 --> 01:21:37,085
We have had a blast.

950
01:21:37,087 --> 01:21:38,839
I need to go to bed.

951
01:21:43,010 --> 01:21:44,675
Have a carrot.

952
01:21:44,677 --> 01:21:45,926
Ow.

953
01:22:52,566 --> 01:22:54,733
Okay,.

954
01:22:54,735 --> 01:22:56,068
It just wasn't.

955
01:22:56,070 --> 01:22:57,069
I'm fine.

956
01:23:45,612 --> 01:23:47,946
And, it was fucking nothing.

957
01:24:06,366 --> 01:24:09,297
Subtitles by explosiveskull