One Last Sunset - Ch. 4

>It's more disappointing than you'd imagined.

>The sun had already crested the horizon behind you, but you could hardly tell. The dreary, overcast skies above you kept the warmth of day away from you and the tank top you got with Sunset didn't do much to help the piercing nip of the cold winds as they brushed across the beach. You know the waters would be even colder and more uncomfortable, but if you wait for everything to be perfect it would never happen. You close your eyes and remind yourself of yesterday, about the first hints of your own mindset causing problems and how much more they'd surely cause down the line. It's better this way.

>You roll that familiar orange bottle around your palm as the skies darken even more under a particularly heavy cloud cover. It needs to be today, you tell yourself, things will only get worse from here; better to end it on a high note, right? Your heart sinks as you try to think back to the good times of the past few days with Sunset. You know she'd be hurt, but this is for the best, for both of you. You silently hope she'll understand one day, even if she is upset she couldn't fix everything. With a long, deep breath you pop off the cap of the pill bottle and let it fall into the sand at your feet. Another long gaze out to the endless ocean brought a pang of nervousness to your stomach; this is going to suck a lot more than you'd initially hoped, but it would never be as bad as returning to that endless isolation and added disappointment of your new friend forgetting about you. A little pain now is a small pittance, really.

>You take your first step forward off of the dry sand and feel the ice-cold water brush against your feet with the waves. The dark, grey world disappeared for a moment as you closed your eyes and put that orange bottle to your lips to let the first tablets of release slid against your tongue. It'd finally be over. The thought is almost comforting, in a way.

"Stop!" a harsh scream snapped you out of your trance with the sudden feeling of a harsh smack across your face. The bottle in your hand flew out of your grasp and into the water, its contents quickly dissolving with the building foam of each wave. You turn to see your aggressor as the stinging settles into your cheek and nose.

"Spit it out!" Sunset demands at your side, holding a hand under your chin as she glared daggars at you with a fury you haven't seen since you initially pissed her off all those years ago. "Spit it out! Now!"

>You have to blink a few times at the unfettered rage before you finally comply, letting the pills slip off your tongue and down into her hand. All you can feel is fear at the anger in her face. Even in the overcast sky you can see the disheveled hair and sweat dripping off her body. She's still wearing the clothes you saw her fall asleep in, but now they're damp with sweat as she pants for breath in front of you. Just as she clenches her fist and takes an angry step away from you, you notice the tears running down her cheeks and the wetness of her eyes.

>Sunset lets of an angry growl charges into the water, throwing the contents against her palm out as far as she possibly could into the ocean like an angry mother attacking someone that just hurt her family. The handful of pills fly into the water, never to be seen again, and Sunset trips under her own reckless rage to splash to her knees in the water. You reach a hand out to her, but pull it back as you hear the angry groans slip into tired sobs. The waves splash up her thighs to coat her face and shirt in sea water, but that seems like that last thing she's worried about now.

You take a few steps out to her, unsure of what to do. Your eyes flick to the tablets and the orange bottle in the ocean for a moment, but the medicine is all but gone now. "Sunset..."

Sunset snuffs out her pained sobs to look up at you for a moment, her expression an unfamiliar mixture of anger and sadness as she shakes her head at you. "I know, alright! I know why you're out here," she says between her desperate panting for air. "I knew the day we met what you were going to do. It's over, okay? I'm not going to let you." She haphazardly scrambles to her feet to stomp over at you, tapping a finger against your chest and giving you a glare that could kill a man if focused too long. "I don't care what you have to say or why you're still trying, but it's over. If I have to call the police to get you detained I will. If I have to strap you down to a chair until you come to your senses, I will. Do you understand? You're not dying, okay?! I'm not losing you."

The tears streaming down her cheeks betray the rage in her eyes. Her pupils dance between each of your eyes as she waits for an answer, her angry demeanor quickly fading back to sadness. "Do you understand?!"

You put your hands up for her. "Yes, yes, I understand, Sunset," you blurt out back to her, your heart racing in fear.

>Her angry scowl fades as she clenches her eyes shut and lets another sob through. She rushes forward at you and for a moment you think she might tackle you, but instead wraps her arms around your midsection for a tight, desperate hug. Her loud whimpers and cries are only slightly muffled by your chest as she buries herself in it.

>You timidly place your arms around her back, but it's not a hug like it was before. Shame gripped at your stomach for forcing Sunset to experience that, for trying even when she somehow knew. Your entire mood drifts away from the empty acceptance of your death to intense hatred for yourself for putting Sunset in this distraught state. You want to get away from her, to never have to face her again to see those pained expressions contrasting so hard from the wonderful smiles you remember, but you know she's not going to let you go now. You don't know how long you sat there letting her cry into your shirt—the sun refused to tell you through that overcast sky—but it was long enough to make your legs tired from holding Sunset up.

>Finally her pained sobs slipped into soft whimpers. You run your hand across the back of her head like you're trying to sooth a child and Sunset doesn't bother to stop you. You have absolutely no idea what to say to her and you expect she feels about the same. Your mind struggles to comprehend the reality and the gravity of the situation as you stare over her red and yellow locks out to the crashing, unstable ocean waves whipping about in the wind. This didn't even feel real anymore, but the occasional squeezes from Sunset as she nuzzled herself into your shirt brought you back to the world.

You make a difficult swallow past the growing lump in your throat and finally choke out a few words. "How did you know?"

A hand leaves your back to help Sunset wipe her eyes and nose. "Is that really important right now?" she asks, a twinge of anger returning to her voice.

The fear shoots through your heart again. The last thing you want to deal with is her angry right now. "No, no... I just, I was just wondering."

Sunset let out a ragged breath. "I... I need to sit down," she let out. Your heart sank at her request and you put a hand on her back to lead her over to the chairs on the deck of your little beach house. As you step through the sand with her, you can't help but look over at her puffy eyes and tear-stained cheeks—it's the last nail in the coffin for your doubts about who she is anymore. The intense contrast between the haughty laughs after calling you pathetic and the intense sobbing at you potentially dying shattered the last little pieces of her old self in your mind. Now you just want to help her get out of this... to see that smile again.

>You help her down into the smooth, painted wood of the deck chairs and slip into one yourself. Your hands automatically fidget against each other uncomfortably as you look between her and the floor, still not knowing what to say after the intense experience.

Sunset wipes her eyes again then takes in a long, shaky breath before letting it back out and slouching over. Her teal eyes scan you for a moment as she considers her next words. "Look... I just... I've wanted to make things up to you for a while and you know I can get things done. I found out you were coming out here and got your hands on those," she says, nodding out to the empty pill bottle sitting on the beach. "I knew what was going to happen, okay? I had to do something."

"Why didn't you say anything before?"

Sunset lets off another long sniff. Before looking back over to you. "Would you have stopped if I just came out here and told you all that?"

"I..." your eyes trace down to the floor again. "Probably not."

"I wanted to give you a reason to stay, you know? Maybe a friend you really enjoyed spending time around would change things. I know they made a world of difference for me." Another sniff and Sunset wiped away a few more tears. "I thought things were going fine, but I woke up and remembered what happened last night... I've never run so fast in my life."

"I... I don't know what to say."

Sunset adopts another stern glare. "Maybe something like 'I promise I won't do that again, Sunset'?"

You look away, unable to meet her gaze. Your feel a pit in your stomach grow when you realize you couldn't make that promise to her. A long silence hangs between you before she finally lets out a frustrated grunt. "What can I do? What am I supposed to do to make sure you never think of doing this again?"

You blink a few times as you look back and realize she's suddenly standing in front of you, staring down with that frustrated determination on her face. "Sunset, it's not that easy... this doesn't just go away overnight."

"So when does it go away? What can we do to get you there? What can I do to make sure you're happy again?"

You purse your lips and avoid her gaze. "I don't think there's anything you can do, Sunset."

She leans down and places a hand on your knee to support herself. Now that she's looking up at you it's a lot harder to avoid her gaze. "I know that's not true. Please, we can figure something out. You were happy these past couple days, weren't you?"

"Sunset... it's not going to work out in the long run. I can't stay stable anymore. How many more fights are we going to have before you don't want to be around me? How many more problems am I going to work up in my own head to push myself away from everyone? Things are just going to get worse from here. It would've been better just to..."

Sunset's brows furrow and she grits her teeth again. "No! No, it wouldn't have been better to die. All of my friends have had their problems. We've all had fights and gotten mad and thought we never wanted to talk to each other again but we all got through it. We worked things out and learned from it so now our friendships are stronger and better than ever."

"I don't think I can work these things out anymore. I've been like this for too long," you say. You look down away from her face, your eyes going blurry as they lose focus.

"You can and you will, okay? Please, promise me that you won't kill yourself on this winter break. Please... not forever, but please give me the rest of the break to try to help," she says, leaning forward onto your knee to catch your gaze.

Tears well up at the edge of your eyes as you thought about facing the school again. It's the last thing you ever wanted to do when you came out here. Another day there, feeling that horrible isolation and disappointment, cursed to a life of being a horrible person no one ever wanted to speak to again. "I don't want to go back..."

Sunset's face quickly matches your sadness. "It won't be like it was anymore, I promise. Please give me the chance to make things right. To show you there's still some happiness in your life."

"Why do you care so much? I'm not worth the effort, Sunset. I'll only ever make life worse for you if you make me stay."

Sunset shakes her head hard enough to send her hair brushing against your leg. "That's not true—I know it's not. Yesterday was so much fun. I can't tell you the last time I spent all day with someone like that and didn't get tired of them or want to be alone for a while. I know you've got a lot of bad things you want to talk about and I know there's still animosity between us. I know we'll have problems going forward but that doesn't mean we can't be happy together too," she says, reaching forward to take one of your hands in hers. Her soft, caring fingers send a jolt of pleasure through your body as she lightly squeezes your palm.

"Together?" you ask her, a sudden light of hope beaming in your mind.

"I don't know. I haven't really put any thought into it until just now. I'm really flattered you like me and it makes me happy that that's what you think over who I used to be."

"But?" you say, your tone slipping towards disappointment.

"I don't know if I like like you yet."

You swallow the lump in your throat and nod to her. "I don't expect you to, I just... I just wanted to get it out of the way and ruin the friendship if that's what it was going to do, you know?"

Sunset reaches over with her other hand to rub the top of your palm with a gentle, almost motherly sense of caring. "It won't ruin anything, I promise. I think I want to give it a shot."

"Huh?"

"I know we've only really been friends for a few days, but I've had a really good time with you. This morning when I thought about losing you... I couldn't bear it. I couldn't let you do that to yourself, not just because I don't want you to die, but because I don't want to lose a friend."

"So you want to...?"

Sunset lets out one last sniff before she puts on her best bright smile and looks up to you. "I want to try being your girlfriend for a while, yeah."

A sudden wave of ecstatic happiness fills you up and your lips turn up as well, only to turn back down once the feeling isn't as strong and you can see the intentions. "Sunset... you can't build a relationship on pity. You won't be happy if you're only doing this to try to keep me here."

Sunset nods in agreement. "I know. I'm not trying to do that. At least, I don't think I am. I mean we could count the last couple of days as dates, right? Even without the looming suicidal threat we have had a lot of fun together."

"Yeah, we have..."

"So we can have more. As a couple maybe. Maybe it won't work out and maybe we're not that compatible, but if not we can always be friends. Unless you're just secretly really mean and manipulative, I'll always want to consider you a friend."

You let a tired grin cross your lips for her. "I do my best not to be." You let your free hand over to rest on Sunset's feeling that wonderfully soft skin on your palm to return the sweet gesture. "I would rather you be happy in the end, though. If things don't work out, you should forget about me."

Sunset's frustration slips back onto her face. "I'm not going to do that. Do I need to take you to the hospital?"

"Wait, what?"

Sunset leans back and pushes herself back up to her feet, letting her hands slip away from you and the wonderful feelings with them. "I should take you to the hospital right now, you know. I should tell them you just tried to kill yourself and let your parents know what happened. I don't know if you understand just how [i]serious[/i] that is, but you're still talking to me like it's an inevitability."

A pit in your stomach forms at the thought of all that. "No, I... I'd rather not do that."

Sunset reaches out a hand to you. "I don't want to do that to you either." You look over the smooth, light skin for a moment then up to her teal eyes looking down at you. Her expression is a far cry from the hopeful smile she first gave you when she offered you her hand, but you grasp it anyway and let her guide you up to your feet.

"I might be making a mistake, but I think it could be better for both of us if we just try to have a good time, then when we get back we can sort out what we're going to do with you," she says up to you. Her stern expression fades to those hopeful, questioning eyes as she reads your face.

"Sunset... I'm not worth all this."

And right back to that stern frustration. "Hey, it's my time and I'll spend it helping whoever I want, got it?"

You let out a tired laugh. "Yeah."

"I want to spend my break with you, okay? I want to try being together. I want you to be happy and I think us being together could make me really happy too," she says, her face slowly adopting a hopeful smile again. "We've got a lot we need to talk about, but first..." Sunset flips out her phone and taps on it a few times. You crane your neck over to get a peek at what she's up to, but she's done before you notice. "I'm moving in."

You have to blink a few times in an attempt to register. "What?"

Sunset leans down to grab your hand in hers before looking back up to meet your eyes. "Look, I know this is all really quick, but I've been watching you to make sure you haven't gone through with it when I can. Now that everything is out in the open, I want to be by your side to make sure you have someone to talk to any time you're feeling like that."

"Move into the beach house with me?" you say, still incredolous those words are leaving your lips. Your cheeks burn up for a moment as your mind tries to imagine all the wonderful and not-so-wonderful implications.

"Yup. No arguments either; I already got a ride for us over to my hotel to pick up my stuff. It's either this or the hospital. Which one you want?"

A lump forms in your throat, but this time it's excited apprehension instead of sadness. "I... this... wow... I don't..."

Sunset finally lets out a laugh of her own to wash away the intense emotions of the morning. "I'll take that as a yes. Come on, tiger, you need to help me with my bags," she says as she drags you by the wrist off of the deck to head to the road. This definitely isn't how you imagined this morning to go. Confusion is still churning around in your stomach, but in the bliss of watching her hair bob in front of you and knowing she's now your girlfriend, you can hardly bring yourself to think of anything else anymore.

[hr]

You set Sunset's suitcase down to the floor with a soft clack. A pit of nervousness grows in your stomach as you wait for her to get the rest of her things out of the car. The ride over to the hotel was painfully awkward as you both kept your mouths shut in the presence of someone else, but even moreso as the uncertainty gripped at you. How would this ever work? How is this not just going to get worse like you imagined? The confusion in you exploded in the silence as part of you grew ecstatic at the thought of being around Sunset as much as possible, but the pragmatic part did its best to remind you just how fast this could exacerbate the problems you knew were coming.

You take in a shaky breath in the short while you had alone. Maybe you should tell Sunset to leave, maybe it would be better just to cut her out entirely before you inevitably make things worse. The sound of her flip flops clambering up the steps puts a timer on your silent thoughts. It'd be for her benefit to cut this off now, but you know she'd never just leave after what happened this morning.

"Alright, I think that's everything," she says as she stumbles over to the couch and lets the rest of her things spill out onto them. "Now we're officially roommates." Sunset walks back over to the front door and gives the driver a wave to send them off, then closes the door behind her. The sudden enclosure shot another wave of nervousness through your body at what your unstable emotions might do to her.

"Is this really a good idea, Sunset?" you ask her, trying to keep your gaze on the floor.

Sunset purses her lips as she slides herself onto your couch. "Honestly? I have no idea. This might be a terrible idea, but I'm trying anyway."

"I just... I don't want this to end badly for you, Sunset. Maybe we shouldn't do this."

Sunset raises an eyebrow at you as she looks over the back of the couch. "Are you going to try to hurt me or something?"

You shake your head. "No, no. I don't want to hurt you or anything, but the argument we had yesterday... I'm not... I don't think I can give you a stable relationship."

Sunset gives you a knowing smile then pats the cushion on the couch a few times. "Come sit with me? I think we should talk for a while."

You anxiety flares for a moment and you desperately supress the urge to start freaking out about how badly this might go, but once you see that sweet smile on her face you take in another shaky breath and walk over to the couch to sit beside her. A lump forms in your throat as you spare a few glances over to her smile. "So, uh... what do you want to talk about?"

"Well, I try not to make everything about me all the time, but... I know what's going on. I've been there?" she says, leaning over to place a comforting hand on your forearm.

Your face twists in confusion. "What? How could you possibly understand? You're the popular girl, Sunset. Everyone at school just immediately started liking you. You have no idea what it's like," you say, trying not to get angry at the attempted empathy.

"I guess it would seem like that if you just watched things from the outside, huh? The girls picked me up pretty quickly, but it wasn't immediately. I actually attempted suicide once too."

You have to blink a few times in suprise at her. You glance over her face for some sign of a chuckle at the end of a joke, but that caring smile is all that remains. "Why?"

Sunset takes in a long, deep breath of her own and glances away. "After the Fall Formal I lost everything. My entire life was built around getting ahead for my one goal in Equestria. Everything I'd done, everything I'd ever learned to do, everything about who I was, it was all to go back and show Celestia how wrong she was for not giving me what I wanted. When Twilight took that away from me, I had nothing."

"But you made all those new friends, right? It hardly seemed like you skipped a beat."

"Well, the school was closed for a month for repairs, remember? After that the girls and I didn't really start to get along for another two weeks. Those were... well they were rough times," Sunset says, a sudden forlorn sadness taking over her face as her eyes seem to unfocus entirely. She snaps herself out of it then looks back up to you. "I lost everything, pretty much. My life no longer had a purpose and everything I'd ever worked towards became meaningless. I'm sure you can understand not wanting to be around anymore after that."

You give her a soft nod. "Yeah, I guess I can."

Sunset puts on that sweet smile again and gives your forearm a light squeeze. "I'm just saying that even if I don't know exactly what I put you through, I understand what it's like to feel that way. When I'd finally accepted that what I'd done was wrong, I thought it would be better if I just didn't interact with anyone at all. I mean, all I was ever going to do was end up hurting my friends, right?"

You look over at her again and give her another nod, surprise coming over your expression. "Yeah... that's... yeah."

"It was a struggle at first as we clashed off of each other, but look at where we are now. Just because we had problems and arguments doesn't mean we can't grow to make a bond even stronger on the other side of them."

You let out a soft sigh. "I don't know, Sunset. You didn't have to go through what I went through. It's been a long time since almost anyone has even bothered to talk to me. I had one friend before, but... it doesn't matter now. I don't know how to do anything but make your life worse going forward. I can't give you anything and I think all I'm going to do is need help."

The cushions shift against you as Sunset scoots over. "You've already given me a handful of really fun dates. I think you're doing just fine."

"That was when I didn't think anything would matter going forward."

"What matters now?"

You rub the back of your neck and look away. "That I'm going to mess something up. I'm already stressing about it and I know things are just going to get worse from here."

Sunset gives you an almost amused smile and squeezes your arm again. "As long as you try, I'll try with you, okay? I know things won't be perfect, but if you just give me a chance I know we can both be happier."

You shake your head. "I just—"

Sunset gives a quick shake to your arm and leans in to give you a stern look. "Hey, just try for me, okay? Can you do that?"

You close your eyes to face the torrent of thoughts running through your head. You want to argue and show her how bad you know things could get if she stays. Part of you screams to just make her leave before she gets hurt, before you get hurt... but you feel something else bubbling up inside you around it: hope. Her sweet smile, the feeling of her caring hand on your arm... maybe things could get better if you just let her try. You take in a deep breath then look back over to her, fighting against your gut to get that one important word out.

"Yeah... yeah, I'll try."

A beaming grin comes over her face at your affirmation and she scoots even closer to you. "Awesome!"

You can't help but mirror the sudden positivity as the warm, fuzzy feelings return in her presence. Her intense happiness, you want to make sure she has it as much as possible as you look over her beautiful smile. Your mind casts away its doubts just to focus on the wonderful feelings that erupted just from being so close to her.

She settles into her new spot on the couch with a little fidget of her hips. "So, I'm still a little worn out from this morning, physically and emotionally."

Your smile fades as you think about the pain on her face if she'd shown up a few minutes later. "Sorry..."

"Hey, you're still here and we're ready to move on. I'm just saying I'm not really up for anything else as intense today. Would you want to just hang out and play video games and eat pizza with me again?" she asks, a hopeful grin on her face.

"Yeah... yeah that sounds really good right about now," you say, your body feeling somewhat worn out too after the day you just shared.

"First though." Sunset moves just a little closer until her knee is touching your thigh. Your heart starts beating even faster in your chest at her presence and she leans in even closer until you can feel her hair brushing up against your shoulder. Your cheeks burn hot with a sudden blush and you have a hard time giving her much more than the occasional glance. "I want to try something."

"W-what?" you ask, doing your best to keep a crack out of your shaky voice.

"Well, we have had a few dates now, technically. Maybe we should try a kiss. What do you think?" she asks in a quiet tone as she moves her face even closer to yours. Your heart feels like it's about to jump into your throat once you feel her breath on your cheek.

Your neck takes over for you out of instinctual desire to face her. "I... y-yeah..."

Her hand leaves your arm and travels up to your cheek as you both inch ever-closer to each other. You bring up a shaky, nervous hand to do the same, but it twitches away from her face at the feeling. You have to force your arm up to settle your fingers on the side of her neck, making the pit in your stomach grow even deeper as your heart ran wild. The feeling of her flowing hair against your hand, her soft skin under your touch, and her warm breath brushing past you as you both timidly lean in is driving you crazy.

Then it happens.

The sadness, the confusion, the frustration all melt away in an instant as you feel her lips against yours. Your entire body lights up with fireworks of emotion at the feeling of her cheek in your hand and the face that provided you with those wonderful smiles up agianst you. Your other hand finds the other side of her cheek to cradle her as the excitement overtakes you and pushes out any thoughts other than how much you never want this moment to end. Your senses suddenly heighten and a rush of energy flows through your body as the world seems so much more alive and colorful in her kiss. The smell of her fruity shampoo, the softness of her skin, the warmth of her body, the subtle thump of her heartbeat... it all becomes your whole world and you can't help but lose yourself in it.

You had no idea how long you've sat there just reveling in the euphoric feelings she washed over you, but when she finally pulls away it's like losing an integral part of you. You disappointed sigh leaves your lips once the feeling of hers falls away, but you open your eyes to see a satisfied smile and fondness in those sweet, teal eyes of hers.

Sunset has to blink a few times and look away to gather herself. "That... that was really nice."

Even in the afterglow you can barely bring yourself to think of anything else. All your mind brings up is how to get back to that feeling again, to feel her touch and bask in the embrace of her kiss. An intense heat has spread across your cheeks in the afterglow and it grows even hotter once you realize how much someone between your legs enjoyed it as well.

You clear your throat and look away as well, thankful her eyes aren't studying downward. "Y-yeah. We should definitely do that more often.

Sunset leans forward again and places a hand on your chest. Her lips grace your cheek and send another jolt of ecstasy through your system at the feeling. You can barely stay upright as your mind focuses in on the little wet spot on your face.

"One step at a time, okay? So how about that evening of pizza and video games?"

With all your worries drifting off like dust in the wind, spending another night with her sounds like heaven and you can't imagine anything else you'd rather want. "Let's do it," you say, trying to refocus yourself through the swarm of bliss and hormones.

Sunset grabs her console off the couch and heads over to the TV with a bright smile on her face. A little happiness creeps in as she plugs everything in. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all.

[hr]

The endless sea of cracks in ceiling around the fan don't seem quite so interesting as they once were. Memories of the nights spent trading thoughts between the ceiling and how much you hated yourself and the world flood through your mind, but it's not something that's as relatable as it might've been a week ago. Your stomach felt slightly sore at the sheer amount of pizza and treats that had been stuffed into it, and your mouth felt the familiar soreness of the past few days at the constant stream of smiles and jokes that had filled the night between the sound effects emanating from the television.

There was a lot to be happy about now. A lot of great memories to hold onto going forward, but something still felt wrong. You turn your head towards the light spreading across the carpet from the bathroom door, listening to the rhythmic splatter of the water as it rained down on Sunset from the other side. In any other circumstance your teenage mind might run wild with thoughts of her beautiful form and being even closer to her than with the heavenly kiss of a few hours ago. Right now you can't lose yourself in the happiness though.

Your mind flashes Sunsets concerned eyes from the edge of the bed again, her endlessly trying to make you promise you wouldn't do anything while she took a shower. It was understandable after the events of this morning, but you couldn't manage to hold back the intense waves of guilt as reality crept back in. Through all the laughing and button-tapping, you didn't think to consider how traumatic that would've been for her.

You let out a long sigh as the sound of the shower finally cuts off. Sunset's beautiful smile plays over and over in your head, contrasted by the tears streaming down her cheeks and the fear on her face of this morning. Your eyes glance down to your thumbs tapping each other across your chest as the sullen realization builds back up: she deserves better. The joy of the day had faded from your emotions and confusion crept its way back in. A frustrated groan builds up inside of you once the stress of it all returns. Now you know you have to make a choice: be the kind of person Sunset would be deserving of, or accept that you're hopeless and will only ever make things worse.

The dark side of your mind started again, filling the world of emotion you once enjoyed with that uncomfortable emptiness as it throws a constant barrage of evidence at you to prove you need to give up. You roll over in the bed and grip the sheets, doing your best to push the the arguments out of your mind. Inside your gut you felt a sudden spark, something stronger than before. You look up to the ceiling again, trying to force your mind to find ways to make this work, to be better for her. If this didn't end horribly... it could be the one thing that finally makes you want to stay. The dominating presence of your own negativity battles as hard as it can against the new stream of thoughts, but neither would give way to the other any longer.

Before you could stew in the battlefield of your mind any longer, the door clicks open and you see Sunset walk out of it, a new set of clothes on and a towel furiously rubbing against her wet hair. "Forgot my blow-dryer," she says with one eye closed.

"Didn't remember mine either," you say, a little more confusion building inside you once you feel the smile cross your face.

Sunset let out a little laugh as she rubbed the last bit of water she was willing to work on. Your heart eases at the sound of her amusement and you do your best to push away the negativity eating at you so you can enjoy a few more moments with her before bed.

"It's going to be a little wet for a while, but you'll get used to it," Sunset says before grabbing a fluffy, purple blanket you remember seeing from her hotel room. She brings it up to her chest and lets it drape over her bare legs as she sits down on the opposite side of the bed.

You sit up straight at the feeling of her weight on the other side of the bed, a pang of surprise and anxiety overtaking your expression. "Woah, wait. You're going to sleep—"

"Yeah... you okay with that?" Sunset gave you a pointed expression; doesn't look like she's going to let you say no anyway.

"I... that's kind of quick, don't you think?" you say as you look away. A nervous lump quickly fills your throat and an uncomfortable warmth spreads across your cheeks at the thought of her sleeping next to you.

"It is, yeah," Sunset says, a solemn expression on her face. "But after what happened this morning, I don't want to take any risks, okay? I don't want to have to wake up to you being gone forever until I'm sure things are okay. So we're going to fall asleep next to each other and if you get up I can know about it."

The blush on your face grows even darker at the thought of being that close to her all night. Your mind races with all the embarrassing ways that could end up, but a comforting hand finds your shoulder to make you look back over to those sweet teal eyes. "Please. It would really help to keep me from worrying all night."

You blink a few times and try to swallow the lump in your throat. "O-okay. We can do that."

A gentle, caring smile spreads across Sunset's lips and she slides over on the bed next to you. Her form cuddles up to your side and you can feel the still-wet strands brush against your arm. The nervousness inside you explodes and your heartbeat starts racing as she fumbles around with her blanket to drape it over the both of you. The incredibly soft fabric doesn't do much to ease the stiffness overtaking your body as Sunset nudges you back onto the mattress.

You have to keep yourself from hyperventilating as Sunset's cheek rests on your chest and she drapes an arm over you. The feeling of the soft skin of her thighs rubs against yours as she wraps that around you as well, keeping your eyes wide at red alert as your member grows just as stiff at the feeling. Thankfully you flip it up in your waistband before Sunset notices.

"Hey, I'm not going to bite, you know," she says as she leans over to look into your eyes with an amused smile.

"I... I know. This is... this..." you stumble through, having to clear your throat. "I've just never done this before.

Sunset gives you an amused chuckle. "Well, it's easy. Just put your arm around my shoulders and lie back. Should be asleep in no time," she says as she settles her cheek back into your chest.

You take a long, shaky deep breath and let your arm fall across her shoulders. The feeling of her presence is... comforting after the nervousness starts to fade. After a long series of deep breaths, your heart rate finally goes back to normal as well and the fatigue of the day starts to catch up with you. Your heart goes back to fluttering though as Sunset nuzzles her cheek against you and lets off a tired yawn. You give her a loving squeeze in return and do your best to relax against the pillow, trying to focus only on the wonderful, relaxing feelings of being wrapped up in her arms.

You stare up at the cracks in the ceiling, but your eyes don't want to stay open any longer. In her arms you finally felt... at peace. The battle in your mind tried to rage on, but you couldn't give anymore attention to it. All you want to think about now is the rhythmic breathing of your girlfriend against you, the soft brushing of her smooth thighs, and the feeling of drifting away in her embrace. The negative thoughts can wait for tomorrow, though; tonight you know you're going to sleep better than you had in years.