[1] Tea and a Story

>Day skulls in Equestria
>You're Celestia, and you're having a charming cup of tea with Anon
>He had shown up six months ago, and you were afraid you would have needed to melt him into a puddle of metal and goo when you first met him
>So much anger, and rage
>But when you dove into his mind as you had to so many strange creatures before, you discovered that, underneath all that rage and hate, was more rage
>And hate
>And rage
>But finally, underneath all that, was a once honest creature, with love in his heart, however shriveled it was
>And so, for the past months, you have been attempting to change him, as an experiment
>At least, that's what you tell everyone
>To tell the truth, you actually though he was rather rugged and handsome, underneath all those scars
>God, those scars~
>And those spikes on his armor. You hadn't seen such armor since you were a filly
>You are Celestia, and big angry men with sexy, pointy armor is your fetish
>"More tea, Warmaster?"
>You turn to him, that warm, radiant smile you always wear plastered to your face
"Yes please, Anon. And call me Celestia, that title is far too formal for afternoon tea"
>It had been going rather well, to tell the truth
>He hadn't attempted to rip OR tear any of your ponies for the past three months
>And anything  else for the last one
>And right now, he was telling you of an old friend he had, someone who went by the name of Kharn
>A pretty swell guy, if he is to be believed.
>He pours you another cup, takes a tip from his own, which in reality was a mug made from a large reptilian skull
>He used to use your own teacups, but after going through the eighth set of them he decided his own mug would be better
>"See, we were both on this jungle planet right in the middle of our campaign, and we had the goal to hunt down some local tribe of lizardfolk. It's actually where I got this beauty"
>He holds up his mug and jiggles it a bit, before taking another sip
>"So, he came up with this idea to scare the hell out of the tribe, right? Their leader was this massive fat frog thing, and he wanted to jump out of him like a birthday cake"
>Your mouth can't help but water at the thought of cake, and the popping frog
>The former due to how delicious cake was
>fluffy, stacked chocolate cake, filled with fudge and caramel, drizzled with other chocolate...
>But you're getting off topic
>The later was most likely due to Anon himself
>After diving into his mind, as well as the many days you two spent together, he was starting to rub off on you
>All the gifts that he started to give you around two months ago probably helped as well
>The sound of him continuing with his story snapped you out of your internal dialogue
>"What we did was, heh, 'convince' that sorcerous fuck that was with us for some godawful reason to teleport him into the exact same spot at their leader during the next day's worship of whatever gods they believed in"
>"By Khorne, it was amazing. That frog thing got even fatter for a second before he popped like a balloon! His entrails were absolutely everywhere. And what do you know, his skull comes flying right at me, and I catch it, only for him to shoot me a thumbs up and tell me it would make a great mug over the vox"
>"What a guy, that Kharn. He also plays a mean poker hand, let me tell you"
>You couldn't help but chuckle at the end of his story, and grinned at him from across the table
"Oh, so you have poker where you're from? Perhaps we should have a game. I have quite a bit of experience with the game"
>While that was true, you didn't mention to him that, despite having a smile of stone for your little ponies, you had the worst poker face in all of Equestria
>Even worse than Applejack
>That thought sends a slight shudder through you, and your grin turns slightly sheepish
Mmm, perhaps that wouldn't be such a good idea after all...
>He then grows a grin of his own
>"The Warmaster isn't afraid of having a game of poker with her champion and battle brothers, is she?"
>Oh, did he just?
>Yes, yes he did
>You feel like you're going to regret this, as the last time you played poker you lost the west wing of the old castle to the then-captain of the night guard
>It didn't help that there was drinking involved, and you didn't handle your alcohol very well.
>Princess Celestia, lightweight and worst poker player ever
"...Oh, you're on. Next week, here at the castle. And bring some of your friends"
>His grin gets even wider. "Oh, battle brother Twilight will just love this!" he cheers, and then tips back his skull mug and finishes off whatever tea he had left
>You are SO going to regret this one...