Thread 109: Stories 31-45

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>AJ
"Sunset"
'Chitania'
~~~~

>ALL THAT WORK! ALL! THAT! WORK!

"You're scaring me..."

>Ah' can't believe it! Ah' just... Ah' got so far! Ah' did so much! Everythin' was just goin' plain perfect, wasn't it?

"It was going strangely well, which I guess I should have taken as a sign of danger in hindsight."

>Canterlot was doin' so well! They weren't a hundred percent, but at least they got past that whole 'they're gonna take us over' thing!

"Mostly thought they were party animals, yeah."

>And then Ah' get down ta' Ponyville, and a certain SOMEONE aside, everythin' goes dang spectacular! We had a dang party and not a one of them screamed! We didn't just take a small step forwards, we dang near hopped ta' the moon!

"One step forwards... all of the steps back."

>Cause then all o' that just plain died, didn't it!? It died just like mah' dang hopes and dreams! Ah' try ta' do that right thing, try ta' make up fer' a whole year o' bein' a dang neglectful and stubborn ninny, and what happens!? WHAT HAPPENS!? It all just gets flushed away! That's what happens! All mah' dang hard work just gets itself bucked right outta the tree by the dang hooves o' fate, destined ta' always make me suffer fer' waitin' this long ta' fix it! The timin' could not have been worse! It just couldn't have! Now it looks like everythin' Ah' was doin' was preppin' for a dang invasion! It's all gone up in smoke! Fire everywhere! IT WAS ALL FOR NOTHIN'!

'Heh.'

The rate at which she changed would have put any changeling to shame. The shift of despair and panic flickering away into a cold, dark gaze was faster than even those looking directly at her could follow. In the blink of an eye, she had become something else, someone else entirely, just from the look on her face alone.

She turned to the Titan, bearing with her all that look entailed, undeterred by the smirk on the changelings face.

>And what. The heck. Do ya' FIND SO FUCKIN' FUNNY ABOUT THIS!?

'I get to say I told you so.'

There was a pause, a time when nothing happened but Sunset's jaw dropping open in shock, and not a thing else.

It changed again, the whole world seemed to change, when out of nowhere Applejack's hoof cocked back, and then struck Chitania right across her smirking face. Magic uncontrolled went out in every direction as the blow landed square on her cheek, shaking the ground below like a bomb going off and snapping the Titan's head to the side.

Another, far longer pause followed this one. A stillness of death as both parties remained frozen. The former earth pony locked in place for what she had done. The Queen, unmoved save her head pointed in another direction.

Slowly, like a coffin being lowered into the ground, the changelings head turned back.

She was still smriking.

'...I could probably sue you for that. You ponies make this too easy sometimes-'

>SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS!

She closed the gap, bringing her face to the changelings in no time at all, not a hint of hesitation or caution to the fact she was mere inches from someone far stronger than her she had just struck.

>Ya' take yer' stupid mindgames and yer' stupid nudgin' this way and that and yer' stupid need ta' get one over on me and ya' SHOVE IT RIGHT UP YER' DAMN ASS! Ah'm tryin' to figure out how to keep your whole freaking species from gettin' kicked out or way worse right now, Ah' don't got time for this load of rotten apples, unlike you! Cause unlike you, Ah' gotta keep them safe!

Their noses touched as she pressed forwards ever more, still undeterred by the glare bearing down on her.

>So why don't you just march your giant ass back ta' Canterlot and sit that ass right back down on the bench ya' practically live in and leave this ta' me! Cause iffin' there was ever a time you gave a single damn about them anymore, ya' clearly left that behind in that giant pile of ice ya' never should'a escaped! Ah' get it, you were right, bad stuff happened like ya' said, but iffin' ya' don't mind Ah' gotta figure out a way ta' stop this before it gets any worse, thank you! Ya' ain't helping! Ya' wanna sue me!? Ya' wanna get more blood outta this while you can still exploit a terrible situation!? FINE! Go get a lawyer, Ah'll pay whatever it is ya' want so Ah'll never see you again! Everythin's goin' wrong right now. So go grab yer' daughter, the only dang thing on this whole fuckin' planet ya' can bring yer' black heart ta' give a damn about anymore, go protect her, go home, and then shove all yer' "I told you so" RIGHT UP YER GIANT TITAN ASS!

The retaliation was as swift as it was powerful. A black hoof, as massive as could be, striking the princess in the head and shoving her down into the ground with such force it cracked it.

Pointedly, the hoof rose back up, and scratched the tip of the nose that had been poked.

'I've decided against litigation.'

Smoothly, the changeling turned around, marching away in perfect lock step as she left behind the stunned princess.

'Fair warning, last time this happened it went bad for the changelings, yes... but it went worse for the ponies. At least with the changelings, there was still one standing at the end.'

She looked back, just out of the corner of her eye.

'Maybe if I act quicker this time, I can tip those scales even further.'

A glare followed her, never letting go even as she walked away. Never letting go, when the Titan paused.

'But if you really do want to protect them... good luck. Lets hope you did a better job than I did.'

She watched, every second, until the changeling was gone.

"...Applejack? Are you okay?"

She wasn't sure how 'okay' she was supposed to be, given the circumstances, but whatever the criteria, she likely didn't meet it.

>...Go get the changelings, all of them, and tell them to meet me. We're gonna figure this out.

"Applejack..."

>She ain't right, damn it!

She had snapped, so loudly even undead ears hurt. That was all that need be said, before the stone-powered-pony ran off. She had no time to argue, no time to fight. This was going badly, and there was only one chance to salvage the situation.

>It ain't over yet, not yet...

Otherwise, history was going to repeat itself all over again.

>...She's wrong.

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 >Spike
"Guard"
~~~~~~

"Are you okay?"

>... I don't know why I even brought Charity, to be honest.

"Er..."

>I feel like, at some point, this should have occurred to me that mayyyybe shooting anything at all, even non-lethal stuff, proooobably wasn't going to help.

"Not my first choice."

>Still, this response? This is literally the opposite of what I expected. The exact opposite.

"Really?"

>Yes, nameless guard. Really.

"My names-"

>For you see, nameless guard. When a dragon shoots at you, normally, one would expect them to run away from the point of fire.

"...They uh-"

>They didn't, no.

"They actually-"

>Ran towards me, yes.

"..."

>...Just tell me if you see hoofprints.

"You look like you rolled in a barrel of shoes."

>...

"Shoes for horses, not dragons, I should clarify."

>Didn't need to, but I thank you for the effort.

"...Well, I mean, you were a lot shorter than-"

>I know how short I am, thank you.

"Soooo-"

>So yes, that is why I tried to turn Charity to my head and pull the trigger before being run over.

"...You didn't."

>Didn't manage, no.

"...So, uh-"

>Get the shovel, and scrape me off the ground.

"Yes sir! Be right back sir!"

>Thank you nameless guard. And I await your return.

~~~~~~Two hours later~~~~~~~~

>...I think that asshole left me. When I get up, I am so reporting private... FUCK!

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 >Blueblood
"PJ"
~~~~

>...what are you doing?

"Packing socks."

>Why...

"Because socks!"

>I thought you were all about survival?

"What kind of surviving would I be doing if I didn't have socks?"

>...I... I don't know what to say to that.

"That I am right, you are silly, and you understand."

>I am right, you are silly, and you understand.

"Correct!'

>...But seriously, PJ?

"Hm?"

>You don't have to run this time.

"...Heh, c'mon Bluey, weren't you listening before?"

>...

"I'm not leaving you behind again."

>...Thanks.

"Well, yeah, of course I'm not. Can't leave you alone, those crazies down there would tear you a new one. You're all infected with our Invadeness, obviously!"

>Obviously.

"Yep. Probably all my fault too, and I've got to take responsibility."

>That's dedication.

"You know it!'

>PJ?

"..."

>I'm not leaving you either.

"...P-ppffft, like you could if you wanted to."

>You ready to go?

"Yep. Got all my socks. You ready?"

>As I'll ever be.

"Then lets go survive!"

CLICK!

WHRRRHRHRHRR!

>WHEEEEEEE!

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>29
"MM"
'Zecora'
[Trixie]
~Ponyville~
~~~~~

>This isn't going so well.

"Really? REALLY? Did the mob clue you in?"

>Well, they had dispersed not a moment ago!

"That was, like, ten ponies! Ten ponies who have seen some shit!'

'Please my friend, do not rage to the poor thing. You know how easily favor can swing.'

"I know, I'm just a little... worried."

[Because you'll have to do all the work yourself if they kick him out?]

"NO!... okay, well, yes, that too, but I'm more worried about the fact I might lose Niney! That... that would be the worst. I don't want to go back to working without him, or worrying if I get seen with him it'll send the wrong message, or the same for any of you guys... I don't wanna go back to how I was."

>...

'Aww...'

"I'm just... worried, is all."

>... me too.

[Hrm...AHEM! PONYVILLE!]

~WE HAVE A LOT OF QUESTIONS!~

~YOU KNOW, ABOUT THE CHANGELING!~

[The GREAT and POWERFUL Trixie could let you do that, ooorrrr... she could give you a show!]

~...Er, we're good.~

[BEHOLD!]

BOOOM!

~Wow, it's fireworks, that's nice.~

~Real impressive.~

[B-but... but they took the shape of a dragon! I tried really hard on that one!]

~That makes this sadder.~

[... AH HAH! PREPARE TO BE AMAZED!]

SHOOM!
POP!

[BEHOLD THE SPLENDOR OF MAGICAL RINGS!]

~...Yay?~

[O-or... what about-]

CRACKLESHOP!

~Wow, it's fucking nothing.~

[BUT I CAN DO THIS!]

*Down by the riivveerrrr!*

[Singing fireballs, have you ever seen anything so amazing!?]

~Yes.~

[WILL ONE OF YOU GET IMPRESSED-OW!]

~Hee.~

[Don't laugh! I stepped on fire! FIRE! That hurts!]

~It was the most entertaining you've been so far.~

[...]

>Don't let them get you down, Trixie. You did a good job.

"They're just not in the mood for a show, is all. You did fine."

'The effort was appreciated, to be sure. But it seems something else we need for their attention to lure.'

[...OW!]

~Did you just step on something again?~

[HRMPH! No! I was just getting ready for-]

BOOM!

[OWOWWOW OH FUCK IT BACKFIRED!]

~Ha ha!~

~Now THAT'S funny!~

[B-but the great and powerful Trixie can do-]

BZZZTBZBZBZB!

[THIS IS GOING SO WRONG!]

~Ahahahaha! Holy shit this is amazing!~

~What's she going to do next!?~

[Trixie will show you, she'll-]

SHOOP!

[...Oh no, oh no, OH NONONNONONONONO!]

~Oh, OHHHH! I think it's going to land on her!~

~Will, it, will it?!~

BOOM!

[AHHHHHTRIXIESHEADISONFIRESAHHHHHH!]

~OHHHHHH!~

~RIGHT IN THE SKULL!~

~AHAHAHAHAHHAHA! THIS IS THE GREATEST!~

~AHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAH!~

>...Huh.

"Is... is it just me or..."

[T-Trixie can still-OH NO THE CATAPULT!]

WHOOP!

WHACK!

~BULLSEYE!~

'...hrm... wisdom comes in many forms, it seems. Sometimes in the shape of set aside dreams.'

[THIS ISN'T OVER, TRIXIE SHALL-... why are there pies-]

SPLAT!

~AHAHAHAHAHAHHA!~

~I am so glad I came over here!~

>...You know what? She can have the good wine when she gets home. All of it.

[NOT IN THE FACE-]

SPLAT!

>...She's earned it.

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>Dash
“???”
____

She checked left.

Nothing.

She check right.

Nope. Still oodles of nothing.

Good. Great, even.

Now she faced front, staring down at the magnificently crafted sky-blue, triple-decker cake topped with rainbow icing and a Sonic Rainboom nuke topper.

Just the smell had Dash drooling, and she’d put in the extra effort of distancing herself away from any other soul, namely by heading deep into the forgotten halls of Canterlot castle, diving into a room filled with dusty schoolroom desks and locking the door.

This… this right here… it was hers. Alllll hers!

She couldn’t help but grin at her utter victory. Three weeks of planning had gone into acquiring this cake that was almost as cool as herself. Three weeks of planning, backtracking, documents, calls, favors—all the headaches endured just so this beast could be delivered with the utmost secrecy.

And, normally, such Jetset or 007 levels of secrecy wouldn’t be needed, especially for the ‘Bolt Captain… but with her previous mentor skulking about, zipping in and out like some deranged roadrunner, moments of peace, of serenity and calm, were rare.

Her wing lifted a sterling silver fork, emblazoned with the name ‘Rainbow Dash’ along the body.

Yeah, she spared no expense for this moment.

She only paused for a moment, ears tensing, yet heard the soothing sound of nothing.

>Annnnnd, here… we… go.

One bite.

The flavor blast was instantaneous.

Two bites.

Her cheeks flared, her back arched itself in tune with the shiver that ran down her spine.

>S-shoooo goooood….

Three bi-

>…

In the middle of her tertiary bite was when she felt it. That strange, almost elastic-y feeling mixed into the cake’s feathery soft goodness.

So deep in the motion of devouring, she kept chewing, noticing how that stretchy whatever seemed to be more than one bites worth. Indeed, it seemed to be part of something bigger.

>…nuh…

Using her special fork, Dash fished the rest of what was currently in her mouth from the cake’s middle section.

>…nuh.

And lifted it up, still numbly with the other end between her lips.

>Nuh.

“Yuh. And hey, least mine came gift-wrapped in cake.”

>NUH.

“Yuh. Payback’s a bitch, ain’t it, Dashie? Enjoy your cake, though, it’s got a little bit of your idol in it! MEEP MEEP!”

As Spitfire soared off, the urge to scream was almost painful it was so overpowering.

But Dash still had a cake to finish and she would be Fasut-damned if over three weeks worth of planning would go to waste because her ex-captain somehow managed to sneak her underwear into it.

>Yeah, no, fuck that, I’ll sort out her flamin’ ass after this beast is nestled in my gut. …Nice choice in thongs, though.

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>JJ
"Acty"
'88'
~~~

"So that's why they're out there? Well, uh... that's kinda cool! Good on her for helping out with the Empire and never getting any thanks. I sympathize..."

>Yeah, but now Canterlot's thinking we're invading everyone again.

"I disagree, but I see their points."

'I'm sorry, are we just ignoring how he got in here?'

>Can't you convince them of something?

"I... don't think they'll listen to an ex-guard, JJ."

'So we are then.'

>Come on! You talked all us changelings into helping out during Cordyceps, can't you at least try?

"That was kind of spur of the moment."

'Because this really seems like the sort of thing you just don't ignore for a lot of reasons.'

>Come on... please? Just so we don't have to leave forever?

"...I guess... I wouldn't know what to do if you guys had to go away permanently this time. Heh, be out of a job again, that's for sure!"

>Yeah...

"...And I don't want to miss you again."

>Me either.

'...Is something happening? Should I close my eyes?... Wow, nothing? This is serious.'

>You can do it, Acty, just talk to them!

"Well... it can't hurt!"

>No worse than anything else we do!

'Starting to see why you never respond to me.'

"Yeah! I'm going to give it a shot! What's the worst that can happen?"

>If it comes down to it, I'll take those shots right with you! We can handle them, no matter how many there are!

"Yeah!"

'...go oooonnn...'

"I'm going to go to the roof, look down to that crowd, and-"

~~~~

"Well, that went badly."

>WHO IS HANDING OUT ROTTEN FRUIT!?

'Better question, why did they have them? Were they like... storing them for just this occasion? The fuck was up with that?'

"Hide until the supers fix this?"

>I'm liking this plan... wow, you're rank.

'Meh, I'd still let you crawl all over me. Anyone who can keep trying to talk when the bricks comes out is worth a try, and I've been in worse.'

"What? I'd never crawl all over you, I'd help you out if you fell down!"

'...This is gonna be a long day.'

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"Granny"
>Applejack

"APPLEJAAAAACK!"

>Aww heck, Granny! listen ah've got some real shi-GMPH!

"Y'ALL NOT BEEN THINKIN' Y'ALL COULD DIRTY YER MOUTH LIKE THAT ALL THE TIME WITHOUT ME KNOWIN'? Y'ALL SHOULDA LEARNED NOT T' SWEAR IN COMPANY YA IDJIT!"

>MPP!-Ptoo! Granny! Now is REALLY not the time, Ah've got damn well every little thing come crashin' down on top of me, not t' mention that big fat ball of dumb hickery laffin' at me while it all goes to pot!

"Mhmm an' Ah' guess yer just gonna butt yerself head first into another mess without thinkin' about it, hmm?"

>...No... Nooooo, it suuuuure ain't gonna be like that, Ah'm gonna.... Ah'm gonna deal with...this.... "Responsibly"

"... Mhmm, those eyes sure tell it, AN' QUIT NASHING YOUR TEETH, THAT'S BAD FER YE!"

>Juuuuuust fiiiiiiiiine, Gonna build it aaaaaaaaaaall from the bottom up again...

"Oh now yer walkin' in circles, you kids these days."

>I KNOW! I'm gonna practise some FLYING! THAT'S what a Princess does right?

"..."

>AHAHAHAHA! LET'S FLY T' THE CASTLE! WEEEE-

CRUNCH

"...Iii hope yer gonna pay fer those roof tiles, sugarcube."

>....Mmmf.... nah. NAH! Y'know what? This is now my landin' pad! S'MINE! AH' MADE IT!

"Yer what now?"

>AH'LL JUST LAND HERE WHEN IT'S TIME FER ME TO LEAVE CANTERLOT EVERY NOW AN' THEN! COS' I'M SURE GONNA HAFTA THE TIME TO LEAVE THAT HELLHOLE AND HAVE SOME QUALITY TIME DOWN HERE HUH?! S'NOT LIKE EVERY GOOD LEFT INNA WORLD IS TAKEN FROM ME AIN'T IT?!

"Will ye quit that?! Ain't Zap Apple Jam season yet! An' bein' a coock s'mah job!"

>Y'ALL NEVER LET ME HAVE ANY FUN HUH?! AH'M TALKIN' TO YOU FAUST! WHY Y'ALL GOTTA DO THIS TO ME?!

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>Luna
"Canterlot"
~~~~~

>OUR SUBJECTS! WE COMMAND THEE TO CEASE!

"No!"

>...THOU DARES SAY NO TO US!? WE ARE THE PRINCESS OF EQUESTRIA! WE COMMAND THEE TO STOP!

"Or what, you'll turn into a superbeing and shoot us with lightning again!?"

>...

"...She's not actually going to do that, right?"

>..

"I'm legit worried, I think I might've went to far with this one."

>...

"Help."

>...Excuse us for a moment.

"....Ha ha! Still alive!"

WHAP!

"OW!"

"Dick!"

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>Lucky Strikes
"Gambling"
~~~~

"...."

>You okay?

"...I um... I'm probably not getting that job at the casino, am I?"

>You want the honest answer, the kind answer, or the dodgy answer.

"Can... can I get the kind answer?"

>Anybody would be lucky to have you in their casino. Really! You've managed to out gamble... a lot.

"...Feeling like I want to go up to the dodgy answer."

>Well, you never know what's gonna happen tomorrow.

"...Bump me up to honest?"

>Almost certainly hell no, and the odds of going to yes are so remote you might get killed by a shark on land before it happens.

"...b-bump me back down to kind."

>You've got skills, ling, someone will recognize it.

"...I-I'll still with that one thanks..."

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 >Gwendolyn
~~~~~~

>............................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................I BEG YOUR FUCKING PARDON!?

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>Cadence
~~~~

So, this was why she didn't really try with this before.

>...What the heck does that even mean!?

This stuff was hard.

So many confusing terms and words, so many backwards and sometimes arbitrary seeming additions to everything, so very many things that needed checked, double checked and done. Some parts weren't even difficult at all, yet they were the ones she feared the most. For what they lacked in difficulty, they more than made up in sheer, unending tedium that would put a pendulum to sleep.

>Come on... come on...

It was a struggle to stay focused, to keep going, to write down on paper after paper after paper. To double check everything even when she had to sign for it three times over. It bore into her skull like a drill, but a least a drill would be so kind as to promise her the feeling of something other than tedium and the headache. At least with the drill, she knew it would end fairly shortly.

Not at all with this. It seemed to never end. Considering how often that Eighteen was working, it maybe never did. It never stopped.

Nor could she.

>You can do this.

Determination, grit teeth and moxie, that was all she had left at this point. That was all she could hang to, as talent and years of work were clearly not in her corner right now. This was all she had.

>...You have to do this.

It would have to be enough.

The silence of the empty room was broken once more by scribbling on paper. It was a start, and even if this never had an end...

>You have to.

She was going to reach it anyway.

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 >Pommel
"Haymaker"
~~~~~~

>Alright! Everyone, please stop with the mob. That's a reasonable request, right? Less mob? That's all I'm asking for, less mob. You can keep some mob if you really want, but just... less mob. We'll settle for less mob. We're making concessions here.

"Captain? They-"

>Are staying at a consistent level of mob, I see that. If anything, they're expanding.

"Yeah, we've got a real mob problem here."

>Way too much mob.

"...Captain?"

>Yes, soldier?

"Look, not saying I'm going to join in or anything, and I'm not even that suspicious considering that one of my best friends is a changeling, but..."

>Yeah, not going to lie, something about this rubs me the wrong way.

"But, it should, shouldn't it? I mean, if you're going to be fucking royalty, get the whole castle and servants and power and all that, shouldn't you at least do your job?"

>Doesn't really help me having to calm these ponies down, yeah.

"I mean, maybe I would just kinda brush it off if it hadn't been for... you know, the whole guard captain situation."

>Worries me too, thinking about it. But still, it's not like Applejack or Celestia was having this changeling work for them. It might just be that only two royals couldn't handle it, and that's why Celestia stuck wings on everything with a pretty necklace for a bit there.

"Yeah, I guess so... still-"

>Yeah, I know. I'm not really happy with it either... but we're not politicians, we're guards. We're here to keep the peace.

"I know... just want a peace worth keeping is all."

>We all do, Haymaker... we all do.

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Non-Canon
>Pinkie
"Cadence"
'DT'
[DEater]
{???}
=???=
~~~~
>Welcome to Night /pa/ with your host Pinkie Pie! It's during this time that content doesn't matter, and we get into vore!

DT and Cadence try to pry open the Dream Eater's huge mouth.
"Let her go!"

'She's an annoying bitch, but she's our annoying bitch!'

With his mouth still closed.
[...Taste like diabetes.]

"YOU...YOU..."
Her bow changes. It appears to be two curved blades connected by the handles.
"HIYAYA!"
She spins it making it grind sparks against his teeth. He brings up his claw and makes a swipe against Cadence.
"AHHH!"
The swipe doesn't come. She opens her eyes and sees DT with TBDRILATU morphed around her left arm like a power hoof, stopping the claw from crushing them.

'Cut him a new *CENSORED*hole!'

[As if you actually can!]
He stands up and tries to bite them, but Cadence grabs DT and flies them up, avoiding it.

"I think we can!"
She flings DT down and she smashes down on his head with the power hoof.

'And we will!'

"Roll him over!"
DT pushes him onto his back. Cadence dives down and hits him in the gut.

[Hnng bleeeh]
The Dream Eater spits out a ball of curly pink.

>Guess what? I found Gummy!
Raises Gummy in the air.

{So you must be the pinks that Pinkie talks about. She speaks highly of you two.}

"You're okay!"
Hugs pinkie, but finds herself covered in slime.
"Ew ew ew!"

>You didn't think being eaten was going to stop me from coming back right?

'...shoot we could have been freed.'

=WHAT IS THIS?=
Luna suddenly appears with a sword out pointing at the Dream Eater and speaking in the royal Canterlot voice.
=A DREAM EATER? YOU DARE TO EAT THE DREAMS OF MY LITTLE PONIES! YOUR KIND IS NOT WELCOME HERE!

The 4 surround him.
[Heh...I guess I bit off more than I could chew...]
He sucks up his legs eating himself until he disappears from existence.

>...wow he ate himself out...what a way to go.
Luna facehoofs

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NON-CANON
>SA
"Sombra'
~~~~~~~

>...

"...Well you can't say you're surprised."

>WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK!?

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 NC
"Chrysalis"
>Fluttershy

"...Huh, I could've had it all, but nooooooo, NOOOOOO, certain SOMEPONIES had to get rid of that for me"

>I think it was implied that you uh.... "got rid" of Applejack.

"....I REALLY COULDA HAD IT ALL!"

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