Anon In Equestria - Chapter 5 'The Big Date'

>The rest of the afternoon continues uneventfully.
>You blame that to the lack of Pinkie Pie.
>Before long, Applejack takes her leave but not before having a word with Rainbow Dash and Rarity.
>And shooting a suggestive wink your way.
>You are not looking forward to tonight.
>You call it quits early, Pinkie Pie would have come by now.
>You tell Twilight you’d rather spend your time actually looking for her.
>But instead you go home and collapse on the couch. Best fucking friend.
>It’s times like this you prefer to reflect upon the more subtle, forgotten things humans deal with every day.
>The importance of family and.
>You may never see them again. Friends, too.
>The fragility of a human.
>Body and mind, so easily broken.
>…
>Fuck, you are never going to get any pussy in Technicolor Horse Land.
>Welp, you’d better get used to giving yourself the low-five.
>Aaaaand now’s a good a time as ever to get star-
>Something starts rapidly knocking at your door.
>Okay. Just… Okay.
>You get to your feet, the knocking stops as you do.
>Open the door.
>Nop0ny. Just a pink cupcake.
>Wait, cupcake?!
Pinkie Pie!
>No answer.
>You call her name again.
>Same result.
>You pick up the cupcake, close the door, and retake you spot on the couch.
>You can’t help but fiddle with the cupcake. You don’t want to eat it, not yet.
>Oh fuck it’s already halfway in your mouth.
>You can’t stop yourself, you take it all down in one bite.
>It looked a little sloppy but it tasted so good. Sooooooooooooo good.
>Confetti cake style, slightly stale but still super-sweet frosting, and a plethora of rainbow sprinkles.
>It’s like she knows your cupcake fetish.
>If you do ever end up running into her, you’ll offer her a room if she just makes more of those.
>You spend the next hour mostly motionless, worry over Pinkie Pie refused to leave your mind.
>The orange tint of the outside sky is what finally gets you out the rut.
>You really, really regret agreeing to this dinner thing.
>But you’re not going to bail out on The Element of… Loyalty? Was it Loyalty or Honesty? Man, Equestria Lore is weird.
>You leave the house and make your way towards Sweet Apple Acres.
>Bathing in the warm glow of the sunset relieves some of the tension. Back on Earth, you took the beauty of nature for granted.
>If your time in Equestria has taught you something, it was you need to get out more.
>You arrive at Sweet Apple Acres, it strikes you as a quaint little farm.
>Directly in front of you is a large maroon barn. A soft light can be seen flicking around inside.
>You approach the large, even for you, barn door and give it a soft knock. You feel a drop of water hit your neck. You see clouds forming above.
>You remember hearing something about Pegasi controlling weather and how they normally alert citizens of storms. You don’t think on it for more than a second, however.
>”Gah dangit.” You hear Applejack whisper. The sound of moving plates is also apparent. “C-Come in!”
>You open the door and what hits you first is the smell. It doesn’t smell like farm animal, like Applejack promised. It just smells like Apple… Everything!
>Applejack sits at a table in the middle of the room. The table held every Apple dish you can imagine and a single, white, candle in the very middle.
>Apple Cobbler, Apple Pie, Apple Fritter, Apple Salad(Really?), and other various dishes.
>Applejack, herself, wore the green and brown dress you saw this morning at Carousel Boutique. Once more, Rarity turns a talking horse into something you can only define as beautiful. The green and brown earthy tones contrasted her bright orange coat phenomenally. Her emerald eyes, accented by the green leather and red apple emblems, were absolutely hypnotic. The front of her mane was swept out over her forehead and slightly curled on the right side of her face. Her tail and back of her mane were tightly braided.
>Applejack was nothing short of stunning.
>You… You wore your T-Shirt, pants, and shoes. You already feel like a scumbag.
>Applejack beckons you over with a hoof, her body language oozing confidence. Except her face, her wide smile hardly masked her apprehensiveness and she was visibly sweating. Again.
>You take the seat across from her. It’s a large, freshly cut tree round. It’s large enough for you but it makes your knees rise all the way to the table.
>Uncomfortable but better than what you’ve had to deal with so far.
>”Thanks fer comin’, Anon. It… means a lot ta’ me, givin’ me this chance after yesterday.”
I’d rather not bring up what happened yesterday.
>Ouch, she felt that one. You did a little, too. Maybe you shouldn’t be so hard on her, she is trying to make it up to you.
… Because I… Don’t want to ruin this lovely evening! So what’s on the menu for tonight?
>She’s able to regain a little bit of her smile back as she begins to name off the different dishes. What you named off to yourself hardly scratched the surface. This mare had a PH.D in Apples or some shit.
>”…Apple Cake, Apple Cinnamon Bread, an’ lastly, a little Applejack for desser-“
>She bites down on her hoof, wide-eyed, as she slams the other hoof on the table. She’s already having issues keeping her urges under control.
>You let it slide. Only because it was funny to see her react like that.
>Your feigned ignorance brings her back from the edge. “Uhm… D-Dig in, ah guess.”
>Oh my goodness, where do you begin? It all looks like dessert to you.
>Applejack is staring at you, waiting for approval.
>You sample the bread first.
>Woah
>Woooooaaaahhh
>That was really good. Like, really really good.
>Applejack giggles at your smile but, who cares about that, time to take another bite into this bread.
>You continue with the meal, each dish somehow better than the last.
>You two get into some small talk. Business, family, happenings around Ponyville.
>She tells you everything. You paid extra attention to her adventures as the Element of Honesty because they were wicked cool.
>After what felt like hours, and it just might have been, later, the food was gone. The candle is nearly burnt out. And your eyelids are heavy.
>You tell Applejack that it’s getting late and you’d better head home.
>”Ah, uhm. Yes ah’m feelin’ quite beat, myself.”
>This is it, the moment you’ve been dreading all night.
>You get up to walk to the barn door. Applejack walks at your side with her head held high.
>She’s proud of herself tonight and she ought to be. She made an excellent meal, she dressed up beautifully, and she kept her urges mostly in check.
>You both stop at the door, instantly you are reminded of the horrors of your first date and how badly you fucked up at you date’s door step.
>If you could somehow repeat that, Applejack might leave you alone. It’s the perfect plan.
Thanks again for the meal, Applejack. It was really… something.
>You are such a fucking pussy, just break her adorable little heart.
>”Aw shucks, darlin’” Please don’t call me that. “It’s the least Ah could do aft-... uh, few ya.”
>You bid her good night and place a hand on the door, she audibly clears her throat before you make your escape.
Yes?
>”Um, could this lil’ ol’ mare ask fer jus’ a good night kiss?”
>You knew it, you knew it, you fucking knew it. The moment you bend down she’s going to knock your ass out and have her way with you.
>But you had a trick up your sleeve.
>You let out a small groan and get on one knee.
>Now eye level with Applejack, you give her…
>The biggest, ‘let’s be friends!’ hug you’ve ever given to anyone.
>Her heart is breaking, you know it is. You can finally use the malevolent grin you’ve been working on over the past few years.
>Yes, this grin feels good.
>You push back from this soon-to-be infamous hug to see Applejack giving you a quizzical look.
>It wasn’t the reaction you dreamed of.
>Then she snorts out laughter, “Shoot, Anon. Ya really know how ta’ tease a girl, don’ ‘cha?”
>That was a huge disappointment.
>She can see that you’re upset and believes it is due to her comment.
>”Aw Ah’m sorry, Anon. Ah was only foolin’. But Ah still feel like Ah need ta’ repay ya for what Ah did.”
Applejack…
>”Ah know, Ah know. We’ll talk about some other time, that okay?”
>You can’t hold in a sigh, you’re tired and you don’t want to deal with this.
That’s fine, Applejack. I’ll see you some other time.
>You finally push open the barn door. It’s dark.
>And it’s raining. A lot.
>You are mystified about how you did not hear it before. It’s not quiet, not at all.
>”What in tarnation? We didn’ get any weather warnin’ today. Lemme see if Ah can find somethin’ to cover ya up.”
>KRACCK! FUCK!
>”Lightnin’? Oh my,” Applejack is looking directly up, “Tha’ musta hit the barn itself.”
>You’re not stupid. You know where this is going.
>”Anon I can’t let cha’ g-“
No.
>”Anon, gad dangit, it’s dangerous out there!”
>You’re about to disagree but another loud crack of thunder cuts you off.
>”I know ya don’ want ta’ be around… me but, I won’ let ya leave this barn ‘til that storm clears!”
>Before you can protest, you’re interrupted once more but by Applejack, this time.
>She pins you against the wall. There was no hunger in her eyes, only worry and frustration.
>She talks in a hushed tone, “Ah know ya don’ trust me right now, Anon. But, Ah’m not lettin’ ya walk outta here. It’s too dangerous an’ Ah don’ wanna see ya get hurt.”
But-
>”But nothin’, end of discussion.” She walks back to the table. “Now, pick a corner n’ get comfy.”
>You promptly sit on your ass where you were standing. It’s not a corner, fuck the police.
>She can hardly stifle a giggle, “G’night, Anon.” She gives you a wink before she blows out the candle.
>Hahaha you’re in a horror movie.
>You lay your head down on the hay but you wouldn’t dare to fall asleep, yet.
>You soon hear the rustling of leather on the other side of the room. She’s just… taking off her dress. You’ve seen her naked before so it isn’t as weird as it sounds.
>She mutters a series of, “Gad Dangits” and, “Ah, shoots” over the next half-hour as she undresses.
>Thump, thump, thump… Thump. You think she was just finding a spot to sleep.
>This all sounds like a children’s book, from the way you’re describing it.
>With a more-than-usual fear of Horse on Human rape.
>Her snores echoing from the other side of the barn do, indeed, confirm that she is asleep.
>But… What if she’s faking?
>What if she did know about the storm?
>What if… What if she expected the friend hug?
>This is insane, you can’t fall asleep.
>You just need to keep you mind active.
>…
>…
>…
>… Fuck, you’re in trouble.