The Pickman report

Abstract: A Biochemical analysis of a blood sample from a private client. Par their request; a full biochemical analysis was preformed including a Basic metabolic panel, a Polymerase chain reaction (PCR) for the specified genes, a Northern blot and a Blood culture. The results of the analysis have brought to light, 4 previously unidentified viruses, 7 unidentified organic compounds, and elevated levels of excitatory neurotransmitters, in addition to 4 new chromosomes whose sole purpose seems to be activating approximately 200 genes located in the “junk” DNA. We strongly encourage this client to bring in the body for a more thorough analysis, as we believe much more can be learned by analyzing the body’s anatomy and cellular structure.

Introduction:
	This analysis was commissioned by the same anonymous client in Seoul who brought us the other strange blood sample last month. We were paid up front in cash and given minimal background on where and how the sample was acquired [translators note: there is a written note at the top of the page that says "best not to ask"]. The sample was brought to us on 6-17-13 via the usual channels in Moscow; we were told that this blood sample came from a deceased 16 year old male, who had been living somewhere on the east coast of the United States. We were given a total of 260ml of blood and a thumb drive containing a list of genes to look for. The blood itself was rather unremarkable at first glance, though it should be noted that at the time the sample had yet to coagulate which is unusual considering that the sample had been collected post mortem.
	A examining the cells under a microscope revealed that despite death having occurred in rest of the body, most of the blood cells (especially the white blood cells) where still actively undergoing Mitosis [translators note: there is a drawing of a “zombie” cell eating a neuron at the bottom of the page.] When we attempted to dissolve the cells for a chemical analysis we discovered that the solvents that we usually use were ineffective. We then attempted to manually extract a nucleus from a cell and found that we could not penetrate the cell wall and when we introduced other carcinogens into the sample in order to halt cellular Mitosis we discovered that the rate of division actually increased.
	The client ordered a full Biochemical analysis of the sample and asked us to be especially careful with the sample as they suspect that the subject encountered a particularly potent carcinogen prior to his death. We preformed a Basic metabolic panel via Thin-Layer Chromatography, a Polymerase chain reaction (PCR) for the specified genes, a Northern blot to check for evidence of gene modification and a Blood culture (both viral and bacterial.) The results have proven to be quite exciting as numerous new cellular structures and behaviors were observed. [Translators note: there was a post it on the report saying “enjoy and send more samples"] the specifics of these new structures are outlined in the results section and the discussion section of this report.