Jump 468: Star Wars Legacy

Jump 468: Star Wars Legacy
>The Empress: Initiative and practical actions that promote prosperity, comfort and luxury.
>Location: Bastion
I'll admit I'm not terribly enthused with this.
>Identity: Drop-In
>Drawbacks: (0) At Last We Have Become Star Wars Legacy
Oh god no, it's Star Wars again. I was Anakin Skywalker last time, and I thought I'd derailed this future, but instead... most of what I did collapsed because of the Sith. It's time to take stronger measures.
>Roguish Charm (Free, Drop-In)
Well, I WAS Anakin Skywalker. Quite charming before that whole fall to the dark side thing.
>Sagely Air (900)
Just pretend you're snooty like Kenobi. It works.
>Dark Presence (800)
That, too, is part and parcel.
>Pure Cortosis Gauntlet (600)
This will save me the trouble of going out and finding the right sort of cortisis to make things out of.
>Jedi Holocron (400)
Ooh, spiffy. I'll have to figure this one.
>Force Sensitive (300)
Anakin Skywalker, with a quarter of usual Jedi's limbs, but four times the power! (No, seriously: The supplemental notes indicate that it seems to be additive. So four Ahsoka's worth. Ahsoka is a unit of measurement? Amusing.)
>Force Perception (200)
>Force Healing (0)
Nifty stuff. I'll take it.

So, among the amusing things I've found out: clapchemy is waaay more efficient and speedy when you need to transmute raw materials. When it comes to gaming physics without using magic, you want nanomachines, son, but honestly I still find myself using alchemy these days when I want bulk material. Or battlefield control. Also, irritatingly, it seems that my armor fused with the nanosuit, which fused with me, so now I literally AM my armor at all times. Nice, but kind of redundant. But still nice. And fortunately thanks to everything else upgraded in my armor and my swapping of forms, shifting between presets in my armor is done in the blink of an eye. And shifting the armor to something rather a bit more... fitting for this universe. Even if I left out the mask and blinkenlights in favor of just using a hood.

And so: using that base sample, thirty seconds into the jump I have transmuted enough cortosis to use for weaponry and have configured my armor to have a proper coating of pure cortosis and some scuffed black paint over it, while putting a cloak overtop to conceal it. And so I found myself on Bastion, in public, with several curious onlookers as my clothes shifted and a cube of wood changed itself into a baseball bat made of cortosis. The people gave me a wide berth - a nice thing, considering I got the attention of what was likely to be every Force-sensitive on the planet. And beyond, if my luck held.

I got offworld as quickly as I could, cheating with Path to Victory to find the fastest smuggler that could get me away. Which, because of how the bloody Force works, ended up being a freighter named the Mynock, but at least we jumped out of the system before the Emperor's people jumped in to investigate me. About ten seconds before, in fact. I paid up front, which made them happy, and I'd expected a nice quiet trip to the nearest place that I could hijack a Star Destroyer. This, of course, was sidetracked when I overheard an argument from another cabin, while trying to relax in my passenger berth. I couldn't help but head over and get my two cents in.

"I don't suppose you two could keep it down to a dull roar, I'm trying to figure this holocron out."
>"Oh, go kriff yourself!" "Really, Cade, must you... wait a moment."
"I think not. So, Cade, is it? Perhaps you should introduce me to your friend."
>"Wait, holocr- you can SEE him? Are you a Jedi?" "You're supposed to be dead and buried, no one lives that long."
"Well, of course I can see him, I know him quite well. Even if he is confused, something of a resemblance there, between the two of you."
>"I'm NOTHING like him. What are you? Jedi? Sith?" "Oh for the love of- you're doing it again, aren't you."
"Well, I have been known to dabble in the force."
>"Who are you?" "Please no. Stop this."
"Why, I thought people would recognize me more easily. That handsome devil over there stole his good looks from his father."
>"What." "Why. Why do you do this. I thought this was over."
"As the Force is my witness, I will take every possible opportunity to embarrass you, Luke! Look at him, he's blushing, it's adorable."
>"That would make you... no. There's no way." "Sorry, but... he's telling the truth."
"From a certain point of view, anyway. Say, how's old Ben doing these days?"
>"Old Ben?" "Obi-Wan Kenobi, Cade. He and his old padawan were watching and laughing their behinds off at your antics- wait. Wait, no."
"Oh, they have no idea how much fun I'm going to have here, tell them to have the troll get some popcorn. Anyways! Cade, right?"
>"Er, yeah?" "Don't. Don't you DARE."
"You're a wizard, Cade."
>"I'm a what?" "Why would you do this."
"You're a wizard. And a thumpin' good one."
>"Anakin. No."
"ANAKIN YES."

And so the universe's destiny shifted on its axis as what should have been one of the most promising Jedi instead became a wand-waving wizard (with the usual precognition, reflexes, resilience, and other such Force buffs anyway). Which gave him power that wasn't subject to the usual nonsense that comes with the Force, like falling to the Dark Side and all of that. Even if I am literally walking around in Darth Vader's armor, playing the part up again to the hilt. After all, it turns out that the various Force-sensitive animals and plants and whatnot work in interesting ways with magic.

So... basically, I hijacked an old Super Star Destroyer that was derelict and somewhat uh, damaged. Of course, putting together LMDs to repair it in the space of a couple of weeks was kind of trivial, considering the designs at this point suffice for a hypercompetent crew that can do their jobs at a tenth of their number. And I dragged Cade around with me across the galaxy stirring the pot for fun and profit, and also his fellow crewmates, while because of smuggling obligations. Because nobody's going to believe that you're smuggling anything in an Executor. Or that you're being trained to be a proper wizard on top of it, because undetectable expansion charms are a smuggler's best friend.

"And no, I'm not going to split you guys up. Besides, we've GOT to have... MONEY."
>"Am I supposed to get that reference?"
"No, but it's fun for the kids at home."

After the Executor III was renamed and appropriately upgraded, I paid Emperor Fel a visit. It turns out he's a giant power-hungry douchebag so I severed his connection to the Force and left, and his paranoia after that point was a whole thing that basically brought his government down; the remainder of the Alliance rejoined his government, in a structure rather reminiscent of what I set up the LAST time around, about a hundred years and change in the past. Should be a bit more stable this time without the Sith poking it.

Speaking of the Sith, I had a three step solution to their issues. Step one: I visited Coruscant in a stolen Imperial class Star Destroyer.
>"My Lord, we've got a notice from orbital traffic. There's... an old ship, hundred years old-"
>"What do I care?"
>"It's deorbiting and appears to be heading for here."
>"Landing on the planet? Ridiculous. Tell the defenses to wipe that thing from the face of the galaxy!"
>"I, it's too late for that, all that can reach our are fighters! And the captain of the vessel, it's impossible but he's claiming to be-"
"HEY, A'SHARAD. I MEAN, DARTH KRAYT."
>"What the- where is that coming from?"
>"It's coming across all frequencies! Even the intercom!"
"I'M ANAKIN SKYWALKER. WELCOME TO JACKASS." [spoiler]https://youtu.be/YIvpdLDt39c[/spoiler]
>"What in the world... what is that infernal racket? Is that some sort of music?"
>"My Lord, we've got to go, he's not intending to LAND... no, it's too late--!"
By "I visited Coruscant" I mean "I crashed a Star Destroyer into Darth Krayt's throne room and killed half of the One Sith in a single blow, televised galaxy-wide on the holonet".

Step two: I visited Korriban. And by "I visited Korriban" I mean "I crashed the empty Executor III into the planet at 99% of the speed of light and there isn't a Korriban any more".

Step three: I hunted down the remaining Sith and removed their Force powers from them. Without the corruption of the Dark Side, most of them were pretty level-headed, actually. I only had to obliviate a couple of them before they were made into wizards. And then I tracked down the Jedi and turned THEM into wizards. And then I made a retrovirus that would spread and make a small percentage of offspring wizards, across the galaxy, and seeded a handful of trade worlds with it for maximum dispersal. Because I've had quite enough of the nonsense of the Force of this setting, and this seems like a better idea.

Also, while Darth Talon initially attached herself to me once I started converting everyone into witches and wizards (as a yandere every bit as wonderful as a zebra mussel and twice as clingy)... eventually? She and Cade became an item. I don't get it either. Nor do I understand how the devil genetics works in this universe because apparently you can have twi'lek-human hybrids as children.

On the plus side, Yoda shared his popcorn with the rest of the force ghosts while they watched everything get thrown so far off the rails that this galaxy will NEVER recover and go back to the same pattern. By the time I left, 95% of the Force users were witches and wizards instead, with just a bit extra in terms of wandless magic. (And a fetish for lightsabers, in many cases.)

And nothing of value was lost.