Driving home from work, I was excited. Today would be the best workout of my life. I could just feel it. I looked into the backseat of my car, a white GNC bag sitting on it with a small red container inside of it. I could see "NO-XPLODE" still inside my head. I knew it was the right choice for me, because the guy at GNC told me so. I pulled into my driveway and stopped, looking around my neighbourhood first. No one could know what I was taking. What I was using. I grabbed the bag and stuffed it inside of my shirt, threw the car door open so hard it slammed shut right after I jumped out. I sprinted toward the front door, making sure not to drop the bag from my shirt. I fumbled with my keys, once, twice, and then dropped them. My heart was pounding. I stared around, no one had seen me. As I opened the door, I heard my neighbor call me from the side of the house. I ran inside and slammed the door shut, locking it anyways. Seconds later I heard a knock at the door. It was him, my neighbour. He knew. He must know. Maybe he saw the GNC logo through my shirt. Maybe he could smell the damn stuff. I took the bag out from my shirt, and held it in one hand behind the door, as I opened it. It cracked open slowly. "Hey Frank," I said, "what's up?" Surely he knows. "Nothing Alex, you looked like you were in trouble everything OK?" I'll be honest, I was beginning to sweat heavily. "I'm fine - just fine. I can't talk, I'm in a rush. I closed the door before he said another word. I took it out of the bag. I gazed at the translucent red plastic, the opaque silver lid. The light glimmered on its curves. I stared at it for a moment longer, before retreating to the kitchen. I grabbed a tall glass, adding about 20 ounces of water to it. I popped off the lid. The smell of fruit punch stung my nostrils, my pupils dilated. The bin had said 1 scoop for beginners, but I didn't want a "beginner" pump. I wasn't some stupid bicep-curling bro. I wanted the FULL effect. I drew six scoops from the container, and added them to the water. The water began foaming instantly - it knew the dangers of what I was about to do. I went to my stereo, and put on the Rocky theme song, "Gonna Fly Now." I'll admit, I did it out of fear. I was afraid of the power that was contained within that red drink. The unlimited power. I held the glass up to my nose, the smell was more intoxicating than before. I took a sip, and stared at the wall for a good minute. I thought it was moving. I chugged the rest, I couldn't wait any longer to get to the gym. I grabbed my gym backed, pre-packed, and changed quickly. I went outside and began to stretch before my jog to the gym. Hamstrings, groin. Man, I was sweating already. I could feel it all down my neck. I took off on a dead sprint, the gym was 2 miles away, but I could do anything right now. I looked down, my quads were stretching my shorts, my lats were stretching my shirt, something wasn't right. No, something was wrong - all wrong. It began to grow dark, very dark, and I sprinted faster than before. The sky began to tint purple. I heard a scream from behind me, it was one of my neighbours. "BLOOD!" she screamed, "BLOOD!!" as she fainted. I stopped for a second, panting, panting, as I looked at her. Then it was me who screamed, as she raised up off of the ground and began to transform. Her hands extended into talons, her eyes grew larger and became red, her teeth were shining by the light of the dual moons in the sky. Her wings spread behind her, and this is when **** went nuts. "BLOOOOOODDD!!!!" she screamed at me, "BLOOOOOOOOD!!!" She took flight, coming straight at me. "What the ****!" I broke into a dead sprint, I had to make it to the gym. I clutched my planet fitness keycard in my hand so hard it hurt. Tears streamed down my face. "BLOOD!!" I didn't turn to look. Suddenly, a man's voice echoed her own. It was Frank. My legs tore through my shorts, leaving them to nothing more than a bodybuilder's posing suit with some dangling fabric. My shirt was almost completely ripped off, as my body had become gargantuan. I looked down at myself, I was a behemoth. I stopped and faced them my chest rising and falling with each deep breath. I screamed at them "COME AT ME!" as the divebombed toward my monstrous physique. Frank got to me first. I grabbed him with both hands, and in one swift overhead tricep extension motion, I pulled his head clean off. I threw the dismembered head at my neighbour but it was no good, she swooped to one side and then the other. She was still coming at me. I put Frank on my back, and squatted down. My monstrous calfs were pulsating up against my hamstrings. With one explosive movement, I shot upward, launching Frank's carcass at her with a deadly velocity. She came down like dead weight. I approached her body, "blood," I whispered. "Blood," I said. "Blood!" I cried to the moons! I consumed what muscles she had, and then Frank's. "Gains," I thought to myself, "gains." I wiped the blood off of my face and continued to sprint to the gym. I felt no soreness, my muscles were fully replenished. I could see the bright purple and yellow sign above a small bungalow. I had no time for obstacles, nothing would hold me back from my goals. I ran up to the door, bench pressing it open with excellent form. A child was in the front hall, licking a lollipop. He stared up at me, frightened. "Fast carbs?" I asked him, "FAST CARBS? ARE YOU BULKING?" He began to cry. He was obviously breaking his cutting diet. I picked him up and, with perfect form, overhead pressed him into the ceiling. He did not come down. The lollipop was sitting on the ground. I picked it up and crushed it in my hand. "What the **** is going on up here?" Screamed a man, coming up the stairs. It was his father. "Who the **** are - oh - oh my god - what - what the **** are yo- what happened to my-" I ate him. I emerged through the back door, his blood on my face. His daughter was tanning on a chair, listening to music on her headphones. She didn't even see me coming. My shadow must have covered her, because she lowered her sunglasses and made strong eye contact. I looked to the ground. "No," I said to myself , "not with creatine. Not today." I began to talk to her "hello how are y-" Her scream pierced the air, and she fainted back onto her chair. She began to rise, like my neighbour had, so I knocked her down and laid her beautiful body across my 20 inch hands. I stared at her for a second - a mere second - before curling her up to my frothing jaw. "Mirin" I said, between bites, "ing mirin" I hopped the back fence, her blood all down my chest. Planet fitness stood tall in the darkened sky, silhouetted by the dual-moonlight. I ran up to it, sliding my keycard down the crack of its reader. Red light. I slid it again. Red light. One last time. Green light. The door slid open, "welcome to planet fitness," the automated voice said, "today is pancake tuesday! Make your way to the yoga gymnasium if you would like a healthy snack with some fat free syrup during your workout!" I was seething with anger. "Excuse me sir but you can't come in here dressed like that I mean this is planet fitness this is not some lunkhead gold's gym where everyone-" I ripped the personal trainer in half. Today was squat day, I had no time for this bull. I ran to the squat rack. I dusted off the cobwebs and loaded 5 plates on each side of the bar. "Sir, if you squat that weight I'm going to have to ask you to leave." I squatted it. Ass to grass. For 5 reps. "Sir, you're squatting too deeply, that is going to hurt your-" I tore her legs off, attaching one to each end of the barbell. The Lunk Alarm had been screaming the moment I had stepped foot in the gym. I let out a scream of my own, defeating the alarm. I looked around the gym. It was empty, except for one man standing in the doorway. The sky had tinted to a dark red. I could only make out the shape of the man. His biceps bulbous, his lats long, his pecs perfect. His comeover was glimmering in the dual-moonlight. I stood there, intimidated by this man. "So, you enjoying the creatine?" It wasn't the guy from GNC, that's for sure; the GNC guy was an overweight dude with long hair. No, this man was ripped. Although, his physique was strange. His midsection was thick, tight, but his legs trailed off onto nothing... like he had no calfs or feet at all. Who was this man? "I am the ghost of Arnold Schwarzenegger past," he said, "and I am here to offer you the next step in your training, you have true potential." I walked up to him slowly, this man was a Mr Olympia champion. As he came out of the shadows, I saw that he was no Arnold. He was no champion It was a manlet. The Sardinian Strongman. It was Franko Columbu. "What... you're not Arnold..." I lunged forward with excellent form, trying to grab him, to consume his muscles. Suddenly, he grabbed me back, and looked me right in the eyes, his muscles pulsating. "Say goodbye to your gains." He panted twice, and then bit my hand. I couldn't move, the strength of his gargantuan lats held me in place. He headbutted me, and began to consume me. I screamed in agony as I passed out. Columbu finished eating young Alex, holding his spine in his hand, which he used to pick the piece of lumbar erectus out of the gap between his front teeth. He reached into his pocket and pulled out his sunglasses, setting them gently on his nose. He stepped outside, and ripped off his shirt. He spread his lats out wide, perhaps wider than ever before. He looked up at the northern moon, and took flight toward the cosmos. Creatine, not even once.