/snoot/ - darkest dungeon part 1

from /fang/ Friday - Classic Edition
h ttps://desuarchive.org/trash/thread/62348233/#62349187
h ttps://pastes.psstaudio.com/post/32a2dd017b2a4f0dbe181d4aa3b29da1
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The Wall [1/3]

>"I had collected many rare and elusive volumes of ancient Japanese manga, and was set to enjoy several weeks immersed in comfortable reading."
>"My weebing was interrupted, however, by a singularly autistic stegosaur woman, who insisted on repeated invitations to marathon."

The Wall [2/3]

>"Her knowledge of anime and its role in various areas of Nippon culture impressed me greatly."
>"My contemptuous impulse gave way to a genuine otaku respect, and together, we began to torrent, read, and watch."

The Wall [3/3]

>"As time wore on, her wild policy of binge eating grew intolerable."
>"She gorged all manner of strange imported sodas, snacks, and candy, intent on gaining some insight into the Eastern nation we both knew to be fueling our obsession."
>"The change in her was appalling, and no longer able to stomach it, I sent her to live in the KO_OP GVH, where her obesity would be welcomed."
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from /fang/ Friday - Bad Sleep Edition
h ttps://desuarchive.org/trash/thread/62352759/#62356864
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The Gardener [1/3]

>"Mastery over the school's network was chief among my early pursuits."
>"I began in humility but my backlog was limitless."
>"Who could have divined the subtle evidence left behind by something as unremarkable as a twitch in the bandwidth of the school's wifi."

The Gardener [2/3]

>"I was forced to assist a Mexican aquilops from the gardening club."
>"Eager to use me as free labor, she shared with me certain techniques and gardening tips she had found to yield wondrous and beautiful results."
>"Having forcibly learned all I could from my supervisor, I murdered her flowers once she left."

The Gardener [3/3]

>"She grew her flowers back with most of their former splendor intact."
>"A remarkable triumph for even the most experienced gardener."
>"Fueled by the spite stemming from my humanity, I resumed my sabotage anew."
>"The aquilops replanting her flowers, on and on, down the school year. Forever."
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from /fang/ Friday - DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK! Edition
h ttps://desuarchive.org/trash/thread/62361653/#62361998
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The Long Neck [1/3]

>"Prying eyes had become a nuisance on the library's wifi network, and so I undertook to receive my most curious torrents by way of external supply."
>"A nearby art school was accessible via a railway station not too far from Volcano High, and a well-organized train timetable made delivery of discrete flash drives possible even in the short time span of a lunch break."

The Long Neck [2/3]

>"I employed a brontosaurus with a knack for entrepreneurship, who for a time, browsed torrenting sites at my behest. And retrieved many valuable animations, films, and rare manga."
>"Predictably, she increased her tariffs to counter, my intense stipulations of secrecy."
>"Such finances were obviously not available, of course, and so I prepared an... Alternative payment."

The Long Neck [3/3]

>"While the greedy dino dozed off from her school treasurer fatigue, I compromised her laptop with every twisted piece of malware I could download. Imbuing it with the weight of trojans and dolphin porn found on the basket weaving forum I frequent."
>"Once she tried booting it up, the computer fan whirred with preternatural force, catching fire and burning the device and all the documents on it."
>"She must have cried out, but no sound could be heard from high in the clouds where her head was positioned."
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/snoot/ Saturday - /stella/ Edition
h ttps://desuarchive.org/trash/thread/62371004/#62375128
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The Junkie [1/3]

>"My zeal to imitate Walter White had begun to ebb, as each chemical reaction invariably brought only failure and disappointment."
>"Progress was halting, and the rapidly accumulating surplus of impure drugs had become... Burdensome."

The Junkie [2/3]

>"I could not store such a prodigious amount of stimulants. Nor could I sell them off easily, shoddy and incriminating as they were."
>"When math class within Volcano High revealed a raptor capable of chugging carfentanyl like water, I knew I had found a solution to the problem of disposal."

The Junkie [3/3]

>"The brightly coloured, adulterated, and horrid homemade narcotics were heaped each upon the other until at last I was rid of them."
>"Reed's house had become a landfill of pill and syringe, tablet and bottle - a mountainous, vast mass of chemical compounds. Consumed by the pink raptor in the darkness."
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from /Snoot/ Saturday - Friends Edition
h ttps://desuarchive.org/trash/thread/62381862/#62383571
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The Cabbage Princess [1/3]

>"The ways and mannerisms of triceratopses are difficult to understand."
>"Those from outside require thorough study online if they are forced to make contact with the herbivore dinosaurs."
>"The timing and choice of words is imperative. Without any serious reason, at random intervals the triceratops may enrage spectacularly."

The Cabbage Princess [2/3]

>"My first attempts at reasoning with Trish were short, and the results catastrophic. I soon found, however, that the herbivore's meal times were a critical factor."
>"The best results came after lunch, when the triceratops was least hungry."

The Cabbage Princess [3/3]

>"The purple thing I had managed to placate was brutish and stupid. Moreover, it required prodigious amounts of greenery to sustain itself."
>"But this was only a trifling concern. After all, Rosa had a garden full of it."
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from /Snoot/ Saturday - Battle Against Lavos Edition
h ttps://desuarchive.org/trash/thread/62385582/#62386453
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The Doxxing [1/3]

>"Teenagers are by their nature loquacious, and the students of Volcano High were no exception."
>"It was not long before rumors of my morbid fetishes and unconventional hobbies began to fuel local gossip."
>"In the face of a particularly unsavory school presentation, snickering turned to mockery, and bullying took place in the school's hallways."

The Doxxing [2/3]

>"The wild whispers of autism roused the rabble to violent action."
>"Such was the general air of ostracization that even my polite plea to the Principal did not deter them."
>"To regain my peace, I sought out unscrupulous trolls skilled in the application of slander."
>"Foul-smelling and obese, the presence of these pariahs on popular student social media profiles carried terrible implication."

The Doxxing [3/3]

>"Eager to end the tiresome school distraction, I instructed my newly formed militia of hardened hecklers, third worlders, and automated spambots to go forth and do their work."
>"Peace and quiet were restored, and the noisome student body of Volcano High was diverted to more... Pressing problems."