Hammer Time

Jayce surveyed himself in his full length mirror. Meticulously groomed, he stood tall and confident while leaning against the handle of his Mercury Hammer, detached to serve as a cane. "Good, good.." he said to himself as he straightened his collar. Sniffing his shoulders lightly he smiled and nodded again, his mind settling on his latest experiment. A pheromone based deodorant designed to attract and excite women, he had eagerly applied it to himself before dressing. Tonight he had a reservation at one of the most popular Demacian restaurants, and there he would see just how potent this invention of his would be.
Walking in, a brief gust breezed through the restaurant, and every woman took notice. Most of them were sniffing at the air, looking around for the source of that irresistible smell. He could hear their excited whispers as he passed them in the aisle, the hungry stares and their labored breathing. As his waitress came back to take his order, it all fell apart. In a moment she was on him, and in the next every other woman in the restaurant had followed her lead. They were falling over each other, pushing and shoving to have their fill of Jayce. Heaven turned to hell when a familiar blue blur shoved a pile of women out of her way, Poppy's small figure standing proud as she reached toward Jayce, sniffing hungrily. Before her hands set onto him however, an armored hand found her head and tossed her out of the way, the crazed and imposing stature of Shyvana coming into view, brief spurts of fire popping out of her mouth as she took slow steps towards him, the other women instinctively backing away from the pair as she closed the distance. "This must be what it feels like to be Ezreal." Jayce thought as he resigned himself to his fate.

Hours later, Jayce beat up and exhausted found his way home. All manner of scratches and bruises coating his body.
Hammer_Gun:The deodorant really works though, it's great!
Spider_Man:Man that sounds fun as hell, maybe I'll give it a try tomorrow night.
Doctor_Purple:I think so as well, perhaps we all need to give this experiment a good try.