Oh, Ramona! (2019)

1
00:01:12,796 --> 00:01:14,005
Ramona...

2
00:01:16,130 --> 00:01:18,713
You're a really good dancer!

3
00:01:20,755 --> 00:01:23,296
It's probably the drink talking,

4
00:01:24,005 --> 00:01:27,838
but I've had a crush on you
since, like... forever.

5
00:01:29,130 --> 00:01:30,296
Huh?

6
00:01:31,505 --> 00:01:33,879
Yeah, sure, I'd love to go out with you.

7
00:01:33,880 --> 00:01:36,629
Yeah, sure, I'd love to go out with you!

8
00:01:36,630 --> 00:01:38,671
Yeah, sure, I'd love to go out with you!

9
00:01:39,088 --> 00:01:41,713
Ha ha, you're very funny.

10
00:01:45,255 --> 00:01:46,337
Ramona...

11
00:01:46,338 --> 00:01:47,796
Check it out, dumb ass!

12
00:01:48,380 --> 00:01:51,670
Take a couple of puffs of this,
and you're set.

13
00:01:51,671 --> 00:01:54,130
It'll totally calm your nerves.
You'll feel...

14
00:01:56,255 --> 00:01:57,713
...splendider!

15
00:02:01,296 --> 00:02:03,296
- I don't... I don't know about that.
- Dude!

16
00:02:05,713 --> 00:02:07,296
Have a little faith in your brother.

17
00:02:08,380 --> 00:02:10,295
Wait a minute!

18
00:02:10,296 --> 00:02:14,837
There could be cops in the audience
or even worse, children.

19
00:02:14,838 --> 00:02:17,880
So we totally were not doing drugs!
We were...

20
00:02:18,546 --> 00:02:21,088
you know... eating bananas.

21
00:02:28,755 --> 00:02:31,546
This is some good banana right here.

22
00:02:40,296 --> 00:02:41,545
Alright, dude.

23
00:02:41,546 --> 00:02:43,171
You're ready.

24
00:02:44,046 --> 00:02:48,713
This is the night you hook up with her.

25
00:03:00,713 --> 00:03:05,005
So, there I go, walking over to her,
full of confidence

26
00:03:06,921 --> 00:03:09,088
and a hefty amount of booze.

27
00:03:14,630 --> 00:03:15,713
Hey!

28
00:03:17,380 --> 00:03:18,380
Hey!

29
00:03:19,213 --> 00:03:20,671
Wanna... wanna dance?

30
00:03:28,171 --> 00:03:29,879
With you?

31
00:03:29,880 --> 00:03:32,754
My dance moves
really attracted her attention.

32
00:03:32,755 --> 00:03:33,879
Whatever...

33
00:03:33,880 --> 00:03:35,255
Unfortunately!

34
00:03:44,005 --> 00:03:47,754
Things were going well,
but fate reared its ugly head.

35
00:03:47,755 --> 00:03:51,462
All that getting my groove on,
combined with being nervous and drunk,

36
00:03:51,463 --> 00:03:53,046
had one extra effect...

37
00:03:54,130 --> 00:03:58,380
In that exact moment
I really had to go take a leak!

38
00:04:02,171 --> 00:04:04,879
- Anything wrong?
- No, I don't have to go.

39
00:04:04,880 --> 00:04:06,712
You don't have to go where?

40
00:04:06,713 --> 00:04:08,796
Nowhere, just...

41
00:04:11,046 --> 00:04:13,046
Just sit tight, okay. Just... there.

42
00:04:22,088 --> 00:04:24,380
Holy shit!

43
00:04:52,546 --> 00:04:55,754
Hey! Hey! How is it all going?

44
00:04:55,755 --> 00:04:57,754
I just need to step in
and brush up a bit.

45
00:04:57,755 --> 00:05:01,338
Well... Probably not...

46
00:05:02,421 --> 00:05:03,629
Why?

47
00:05:03,630 --> 00:05:05,629
Well, cause... you know.

48
00:05:05,630 --> 00:05:07,338
Out of my way, I'm gonna be sick!

49
00:05:10,630 --> 00:05:12,380
Holy shit!

50
00:05:14,296 --> 00:05:18,088
Yo! Check this shit out!

51
00:05:19,005 --> 00:05:22,254
No, literally, come check
this literal shit

52
00:05:22,255 --> 00:05:24,837
which Andrei just literally took!

53
00:05:24,838 --> 00:05:25,880
John!

54
00:05:27,963 --> 00:05:29,420
Oh, my God!

55
00:05:29,421 --> 00:05:31,546
Nope, that was not God's work.

56
00:05:36,963 --> 00:05:40,046
And that, my friends,
was a truly shitty first date.

57
00:06:11,505 --> 00:06:15,629
They say a real man knows
how to deal with his problems.

58
00:06:15,630 --> 00:06:18,295
So I turned to Mommy.

59
00:06:18,296 --> 00:06:19,380
Mom?

60
00:06:22,505 --> 00:06:26,713
Was Dad successful with the girls?

61
00:06:28,671 --> 00:06:29,921
Oh, yes!

62
00:06:30,963 --> 00:06:32,712
Too successful for his own good.

63
00:06:32,713 --> 00:06:35,087
Stop honking, you fucker!

64
00:06:35,088 --> 00:06:39,338
I'll come and shove
that fucking horn up your ass! Fuck!

65
00:06:40,588 --> 00:06:43,921
Fucking stop honking that fucking horn!

66
00:06:44,880 --> 00:06:47,295
Fuck you too! Fuck you!

67
00:06:47,296 --> 00:06:50,046
I hope you never fucking get
an erection, you asshole!

68
00:07:07,380 --> 00:07:09,295
Hello there, Mrs. Alfred!

69
00:07:09,296 --> 00:07:11,546
Take it easy on the cigarettes, Alin!

70
00:07:12,505 --> 00:07:15,255
I don't want you being a bad influence
on my Andrei.

71
00:07:19,713 --> 00:07:20,755
So?

72
00:07:22,296 --> 00:07:24,880
Is your mom gonna let you come
to the party tonight?

73
00:07:26,130 --> 00:07:30,295
Actually, she agreed
that I can come by your place

74
00:07:30,296 --> 00:07:33,337
and... study.

75
00:07:33,338 --> 00:07:35,046
Say... Clever!

76
00:07:35,921 --> 00:07:38,087
You're not such a dumb cow after all.

77
00:07:38,088 --> 00:07:41,295
- Do you wanna suck on my titty?
- Yeah. Yeah, just like a little...

78
00:07:41,296 --> 00:07:45,505
Believe me, this wasn't even
the weirdest thing I did in this costume.

79
00:08:10,546 --> 00:08:11,713
So...

80
00:08:13,755 --> 00:08:15,962
You gonna hook up with her?

81
00:08:15,963 --> 00:08:18,130
I'm way past that.

82
00:08:19,213 --> 00:08:23,588
Besides, everybody is looking at me like
I'm the guy who took the dump last time.

83
00:08:24,755 --> 00:08:25,880
Nobody remembers that.

84
00:08:27,171 --> 00:08:29,921
Yeah. Do you remember?
Oh, my God!

85
00:08:30,963 --> 00:08:35,171
You walk up to her, you grab her hand.

86
00:08:36,171 --> 00:08:38,546
You ask her to dance.

87
00:08:39,546 --> 00:08:44,546
You pretend to be interested in whatever
bullshit she spews, and you fuck her!

88
00:08:47,421 --> 00:08:49,295
Have you ever fucked a virgin?

89
00:08:49,296 --> 00:08:51,629
- No!
- No! Have you?

90
00:08:51,630 --> 00:08:53,295
Not yet, but...

91
00:08:53,296 --> 00:08:54,712
What is he doing?

92
00:08:54,713 --> 00:08:57,796
Wow, I looked like
I was jacking off angels.

93
00:09:00,963 --> 00:09:01,963
Hey...

94
00:09:03,005 --> 00:09:05,588
- Hey...
- What you pointing at?

95
00:09:07,630 --> 00:09:10,171
The... sky, it seems.

96
00:09:11,588 --> 00:09:13,087
Your hands okay?

97
00:09:13,088 --> 00:09:15,380
Ah, yeah, yeah, no... they're okay.

98
00:09:16,588 --> 00:09:19,630
They're very fine... fine hands. Just...

99
00:09:25,380 --> 00:09:26,838
Relax.

100
00:09:27,921 --> 00:09:29,505
Oh, shit!

101
00:09:34,713 --> 00:09:36,046
You're cute.

102
00:09:46,838 --> 00:09:48,421
How you doing?

103
00:09:49,213 --> 00:09:51,712
- You're doing great.
- Oh, thanks.

104
00:09:51,713 --> 00:09:55,880
So... Listen, there's something
I want to tell you.

105
00:09:57,046 --> 00:09:58,338
Follow me.

106
00:10:03,630 --> 00:10:05,046
Go!

107
00:10:09,005 --> 00:10:10,588
I know you're in love with me.

108
00:10:12,046 --> 00:10:13,255
Me? No way.

109
00:10:13,880 --> 00:10:16,545
Shh! I think it's cute.

110
00:10:16,546 --> 00:10:19,170
A lot of guys have been crazy for me,

111
00:10:19,171 --> 00:10:21,546
but you've literally been mad for years.

112
00:10:22,755 --> 00:10:23,921
Well, yeah.

113
00:10:24,880 --> 00:10:26,046
I know what you want!

114
00:10:32,213 --> 00:10:33,838
Yeah, I love you.

115
00:10:35,255 --> 00:10:36,255
But I'm... I...

116
00:10:37,546 --> 00:10:40,588
I... Look, I'm...

117
00:10:41,463 --> 00:10:45,920
I'm... not like the other guys.

118
00:10:45,921 --> 00:10:47,795
No, don't blow it, man.

119
00:10:47,796 --> 00:10:51,629
But I'm not that shallow
to just want to have sex with you.

120
00:10:51,630 --> 00:10:55,004
It's not called being shallow,
it's called not being stupid.

121
00:10:55,005 --> 00:10:56,545
I want a relationship.

122
00:10:56,546 --> 00:10:58,420
Say what?

123
00:10:58,421 --> 00:10:59,379
What?

124
00:10:59,380 --> 00:11:04,087
Something that...
that lasts into all of eternity.

125
00:11:04,088 --> 00:11:05,671
- And...
- Shh! What the fuck?

126
00:11:06,546 --> 00:11:07,462
Are you serious?

127
00:11:07,463 --> 00:11:08,920
Ah, yeah... what the fuck?

128
00:11:08,921 --> 00:11:11,588
In what relationship? Look...

129
00:11:15,213 --> 00:11:21,921
I'm the hottest girl at school
and you're... you.

130
00:11:24,171 --> 00:11:25,588
Stop being silly.

131
00:11:30,671 --> 00:11:33,005
Sorry, guy in the fourth row.
No boobies for you.

132
00:11:33,796 --> 00:11:37,670
Rather than have you for one night

133
00:11:37,671 --> 00:11:42,380
and then lose any chance
of having you forever...

134
00:11:43,713 --> 00:11:45,213
I'd rather not have you at all.

135
00:11:47,921 --> 00:11:50,255
I just nutted
when your boobs touched my chest.

136
00:11:51,838 --> 00:11:53,338
God, you're a fucking moron!

137
00:11:54,213 --> 00:11:55,837
Wow, twice!

138
00:11:55,838 --> 00:11:59,088
I'm giving you what any guy would kill
to have and you say "No thanks"?

139
00:12:03,171 --> 00:12:04,463
Fuck you!

140
00:12:28,463 --> 00:12:30,879
I think I just made
the biggest mistake of my life.

141
00:12:30,880 --> 00:12:33,004
Isn't that what your mom said
when you were born?

142
00:12:33,005 --> 00:12:34,380
Cut it out, dumb ass!

143
00:12:36,671 --> 00:12:38,004
I meant Ramona.

144
00:12:38,005 --> 00:12:41,588
Ah, yeah.
I'd move out of town if I were you.

145
00:12:43,588 --> 00:12:44,796
Maybe even the city.

146
00:12:45,671 --> 00:12:48,296
The town is the city, you fuckwit.

147
00:12:50,755 --> 00:12:53,588
I just can't have sex with a girl
if we're not in a relationship.

148
00:12:57,255 --> 00:13:00,505
- You wanna do it or should I?
- Oh, you've known him longer.

149
00:13:04,838 --> 00:13:05,963
Alright.

150
00:13:07,880 --> 00:13:09,838
Listen, motherfucker!

151
00:13:10,713 --> 00:13:14,379
I would take a science test every day
for the rest of my life

152
00:13:14,380 --> 00:13:16,213
just to smell that pussy!

153
00:13:19,046 --> 00:13:21,588
Yeah, well, maybe I'm dumber.

154
00:13:24,588 --> 00:13:26,963
Forget about it.
You made the right call.

155
00:13:28,588 --> 00:13:31,296
Ramona means more to you
than just a one-night stand.

156
00:13:32,838 --> 00:13:34,587
I was good.

157
00:13:34,588 --> 00:13:36,920
Ramona was now Silviu's girlfriend,

158
00:13:36,921 --> 00:13:40,505
giving me the perfect excuse
to forget about her.

159
00:13:44,713 --> 00:13:46,254
Day after day

160
00:13:46,255 --> 00:13:50,045
and I couldn't believe Silviu
hadn't been hit by a truck

161
00:13:50,046 --> 00:13:51,630
or struck by lightning or something.

162
00:13:58,130 --> 00:14:00,670
Shut up, dude!
In life it's always better to be honest.

163
00:14:00,671 --> 00:14:03,088
Yes, if you're retarded.

164
00:14:04,213 --> 00:14:07,796
Because retarded people don't understand
the concept of getting away with lies.

165
00:14:11,171 --> 00:14:13,170
Come on, finish my homework.

166
00:14:13,171 --> 00:14:15,421
- Please, I...
- No, no. Finish it now.

167
00:14:16,213 --> 00:14:18,462
- Faster!
- Okay.

168
00:14:18,463 --> 00:14:21,004
Silviu, we need to talk.

169
00:14:21,005 --> 00:14:24,545
Make it fast,
I'm busy with my math homework.

170
00:14:24,546 --> 00:14:26,420
Here's the thing...

171
00:14:26,421 --> 00:14:29,170
I know Ramona only hooked up
with you to get back at me...

172
00:14:29,171 --> 00:14:31,462
- My God...
- I think you can tell that as well.

173
00:14:31,463 --> 00:14:33,004
It's like he's breaking up with him.

174
00:14:33,005 --> 00:14:36,087
...for the sake
of our long-lasting friendship,

175
00:14:36,088 --> 00:14:38,630
I think you'd agree
that you should break up with her.

176
00:14:42,171 --> 00:14:43,545
What did you say?

177
00:14:43,546 --> 00:14:47,337
Yeah, it's only fair for you to not be
caught between me and Ramona

178
00:14:47,338 --> 00:14:49,588
just so that she can make me jealous.

179
00:14:52,921 --> 00:14:54,588
So I'm just a loser

180
00:14:55,713 --> 00:14:58,713
and there's no way
she can actually be into me, right?

181
00:14:59,588 --> 00:15:02,295
No, what I meant to say...

182
00:15:02,296 --> 00:15:04,463
What? That you're better than me?

183
00:15:06,296 --> 00:15:08,671
No, I just don't want you to get hurt.

184
00:15:09,296 --> 00:15:12,005
Hey, babe, check this little shit out.

185
00:15:16,838 --> 00:15:20,005
He says you only got with me
to get back at him.

186
00:15:20,588 --> 00:15:23,046
- What?
- Is that true?

187
00:15:24,713 --> 00:15:26,338
I don't know what he's talking about.

188
00:15:26,880 --> 00:15:29,254
I've had a crush on you
ever since I saw you.

189
00:15:29,255 --> 00:15:32,213
Ramona, let's be honest.

190
00:15:33,546 --> 00:15:36,505
The best thing in life
is to be honest, right?

191
00:15:37,463 --> 00:15:42,255
It's better that you confess to Silviu now
that you got mad at me because...

192
00:15:42,755 --> 00:15:44,879
I didn't want to have sex with you
that night

193
00:15:44,880 --> 00:15:47,629
and that is why you're doing all of this.

194
00:15:47,630 --> 00:15:49,463
You must be out of your mind.

195
00:15:50,338 --> 00:15:53,671
Silviu is the only man
I would ever want to...

196
00:15:57,671 --> 00:15:59,213
make love to.

197
00:15:59,838 --> 00:16:01,130
Bitch!

198
00:16:01,713 --> 00:16:05,545
And by the way...
I didn't want Silviu to know,

199
00:16:05,546 --> 00:16:08,587
but could you please stop texting me
in the middle of the night?

200
00:16:08,588 --> 00:16:10,712
- What?
- I'm really not interested.

201
00:16:10,713 --> 00:16:12,754
You're texting my girl
in the middle of the night?

202
00:16:12,755 --> 00:16:15,962
- No, she's lying!
- So you're calling my girlfriend a liar!

203
00:16:15,963 --> 00:16:19,921
If I didn't say no to her, she wouldn't
even be your fucking girlfriend!

204
00:16:20,755 --> 00:16:22,046
Shit!

205
00:16:30,046 --> 00:16:31,380
Told you so.

206
00:16:38,713 --> 00:16:39,962
If you've got a girl pregnant,

207
00:16:39,963 --> 00:16:44,004
I swear I will break your neck, her legs

208
00:16:44,005 --> 00:16:45,796
and raise the child as my own!

209
00:16:51,088 --> 00:16:53,087
It's not that big a deal.

210
00:16:53,088 --> 00:16:56,921
Why didn't you say so?
Scaring me like that.

211
00:16:58,338 --> 00:16:59,838
Then what's the matter?

212
00:17:02,380 --> 00:17:05,170
You know that girl Ramona that I like?

213
00:17:05,171 --> 00:17:06,587
Well, the thing is...

214
00:17:06,588 --> 00:17:08,462
She's pregnant, I knew it!

215
00:17:08,463 --> 00:17:11,087
I swear I will break your neck!

216
00:17:11,088 --> 00:17:13,588
Mom! No one is pregnant.

217
00:17:15,380 --> 00:17:16,671
It's just that...

218
00:17:17,713 --> 00:17:19,046
I like her.

219
00:17:20,005 --> 00:17:21,255
A lot.

220
00:17:22,213 --> 00:17:23,755
But she's hooked up with Silviu.

221
00:17:24,713 --> 00:17:27,254
And she did it just to make me mad!

222
00:17:27,255 --> 00:17:29,130
- Why would you get mad?
- Well...

223
00:17:32,130 --> 00:17:36,004
...because I refused to have sex
with her.

224
00:17:36,005 --> 00:17:41,046
- What... with Silviu?
- No, Mom! With Ramona!

225
00:17:41,921 --> 00:17:45,296
Well, good then.
That was very wise of you to do that.

226
00:17:47,255 --> 00:17:49,546
You know what sex is, right?

227
00:17:51,296 --> 00:17:53,795
- The fastest way to get a girl pregnant!
- Yeah...

228
00:17:53,796 --> 00:17:56,296
...but now I feel like I let her down.

229
00:18:01,338 --> 00:18:03,505
Honey, you're still young.

230
00:18:04,380 --> 00:18:09,171
You have absolutely no idea what it
takes to actually disappoint a woman.

231
00:18:09,921 --> 00:18:13,380
But believe me,
between now and your fifties,

232
00:18:14,213 --> 00:18:19,088
you're gonna have so many women
to disappoint. It's fantastic.

233
00:18:23,213 --> 00:18:25,296
Thanks for the confidence boost.

234
00:18:27,088 --> 00:18:28,880
You know what you actually need?

235
00:18:30,505 --> 00:18:32,046
A break.

236
00:18:40,255 --> 00:18:42,420
I was embarrassed and tired,

237
00:18:42,421 --> 00:18:45,713
but worst of all I was on vacation
with my mom.

238
00:18:46,963 --> 00:18:52,588
But that all changed the moment
I laid my eyes upon... her!

239
00:19:05,838 --> 00:19:07,588
What the hell's wrong with you?

240
00:19:08,130 --> 00:19:10,254
Never seen a lobby before?

241
00:19:10,255 --> 00:19:11,671
Our room is upstairs!

242
00:19:13,005 --> 00:19:15,088
Yeah, right.

243
00:19:16,421 --> 00:19:20,213
You go. I wanna check out the place.

244
00:19:24,963 --> 00:19:27,283
- Thank you so much.
- Thank you, guys, have a safe travel.

245
00:19:29,171 --> 00:19:30,338
Hey!

246
00:19:31,255 --> 00:19:36,129
Listen. Do you know the girl
at the front desk?

247
00:19:36,130 --> 00:19:37,838
I'm... I'm asking for a friend.

248
00:19:38,671 --> 00:19:39,671
Forget about her.

249
00:19:40,255 --> 00:19:41,380
That girl is shady, man.

250
00:19:44,130 --> 00:19:45,630
I heard she is into...

251
00:19:48,171 --> 00:19:49,463
Video chat!

252
00:19:50,338 --> 00:19:51,380
God!

253
00:19:53,380 --> 00:19:55,463
That is... that is preposterous.

254
00:19:59,421 --> 00:20:01,713
- So can you introduce me to her?
- Sure.

255
00:20:03,380 --> 00:20:06,420
Yo, Blondie, this guy likes you!

256
00:20:06,421 --> 00:20:08,296
It's all arranged, sir.

257
00:20:10,755 --> 00:20:12,587
Now that I had my intro,

258
00:20:12,588 --> 00:20:15,796
it was time to use
my gold medal pick-up line on her.

259
00:20:16,505 --> 00:20:18,963
Hey, pretty!

260
00:20:20,046 --> 00:20:24,380
Do you believe in love at first sight?

261
00:20:25,421 --> 00:20:28,088
In case you were wondering
how I was still a virgin...

262
00:20:29,380 --> 00:20:30,837
That's how.

263
00:20:30,838 --> 00:20:37,420
What I meant to say is that you are the
most beautiful woman in the whole hotel,

264
00:20:37,421 --> 00:20:41,546
a title which you share with my mother,
whom I love,

265
00:20:42,838 --> 00:20:44,755
even when she dresses just like me.

266
00:20:53,505 --> 00:20:56,755
Congrats! You've earned the chance
to ask me my name.

267
00:20:59,380 --> 00:21:02,254
So... What is your name?

268
00:21:02,255 --> 00:21:03,963
Anemona. Pleased to meet you.

269
00:21:04,796 --> 00:21:05,838
Andrei.

270
00:21:07,171 --> 00:21:10,463
And I would very much like
to take you out.

271
00:21:15,088 --> 00:21:16,546
Sorry for wasting your time.

272
00:21:18,921 --> 00:21:21,296
You can take me for a walk
on the beach.

273
00:21:36,088 --> 00:21:37,088
So...

274
00:21:38,213 --> 00:21:40,130
What do you do
when you're not working here?

275
00:21:40,880 --> 00:21:42,338
I go to college.

276
00:21:45,213 --> 00:21:47,463
Right, because...

277
00:21:48,796 --> 00:21:52,587
the guy at the bar actually told me

278
00:21:52,588 --> 00:21:55,671
you do video chat?

279
00:21:57,630 --> 00:22:00,338
The guy at the bar
has been hitting on me all summer.

280
00:22:01,088 --> 00:22:02,504
You know what guys are like.

281
00:22:02,505 --> 00:22:05,338
If a girl says no, she's suddenly a slut.

282
00:22:06,755 --> 00:22:07,795
That's not true.

283
00:22:07,796 --> 00:22:10,296
Except for Ramona, that slut!

284
00:22:11,921 --> 00:22:13,130
Anyway...

285
00:22:14,213 --> 00:22:18,421
I think my mom would rather me be doing
video chat than working in a hotel.

286
00:22:19,380 --> 00:22:20,463
Weird.

287
00:22:30,130 --> 00:22:32,880
Listen, you should know that...

288
00:22:35,338 --> 00:22:36,505
I have a boyfriend.

289
00:22:38,671 --> 00:22:40,921
I don't want you to get the wrong idea,
just...

290
00:22:43,130 --> 00:22:45,212
Let's just enjoy the night and that's all.

291
00:22:45,213 --> 00:22:46,213
Yeah.

292
00:22:52,630 --> 00:22:55,380
I'd still like to know more about you.

293
00:22:58,296 --> 00:23:01,380
So... what does your dad do?

294
00:23:02,338 --> 00:23:04,088
Everything but mind us.

295
00:23:05,755 --> 00:23:07,255
Sounds like he could be my dad.

296
00:23:10,088 --> 00:23:11,713
Maybe we're brother and sister.

297
00:23:12,213 --> 00:23:13,338
Like Cersei and Jaime?

298
00:23:14,796 --> 00:23:16,880
Then this would be a really weird date.

299
00:23:17,713 --> 00:23:19,171
So it is a date!

300
00:23:21,005 --> 00:23:25,880
Well, you know...
Dates usually end with a kiss.

301
00:23:31,713 --> 00:23:33,505
Only if you impress the girl.

302
00:23:37,880 --> 00:23:39,921
We're already in the moonlight.

303
00:23:41,255 --> 00:23:43,088
You've got the sea over here.

304
00:23:44,713 --> 00:23:45,963
What else would you want?

305
00:23:47,338 --> 00:23:48,671
A serenade?

306
00:23:51,505 --> 00:23:52,546
Really?

307
00:24:11,213 --> 00:24:16,713
Wise men say

308
00:24:18,755 --> 00:24:24,338
Only fools rush in

309
00:24:26,921 --> 00:24:32,338
Shall I stay

310
00:24:33,713 --> 00:24:38,838
Would it be a sin?

311
00:24:40,963 --> 00:24:46,254
If I can't help

312
00:24:46,255 --> 00:24:52,671
Falling in love with you

313
00:24:55,713 --> 00:24:58,588
Like a river flows

314
00:24:59,463 --> 00:25:01,713
Surely to the sea

315
00:25:02,338 --> 00:25:05,379
Darling, so it goes

316
00:25:05,380 --> 00:25:11,505
Some things are meant to be

317
00:25:12,380 --> 00:25:16,880
Take my hand

318
00:25:25,296 --> 00:25:28,879
That one kiss from her gave me
a pocket rocket so strong

319
00:25:28,880 --> 00:25:32,588
I could've karate chopped
a board in half with it!

320
00:25:46,338 --> 00:25:48,337
I regret nothing.

321
00:25:48,338 --> 00:25:50,213
Who the fuck is Rien?

322
00:26:08,838 --> 00:26:10,380
Warm up the machine.

323
00:26:11,255 --> 00:26:13,796
Failure to properly warm up the engine

324
00:26:14,380 --> 00:26:16,630
and various other
machine components

325
00:26:17,338 --> 00:26:21,712
can result in a decrease in service life
of the machine.

326
00:26:21,713 --> 00:26:23,171
Or in malfunctions.

327
00:26:23,796 --> 00:26:27,962
In winter, run the engine
for at least five minutes

328
00:26:27,963 --> 00:26:29,546
for proper warm up.

329
00:26:30,380 --> 00:26:33,379
Then, run the engine at a low speed

330
00:26:33,380 --> 00:26:36,254
without a load to warm up
the hydraulic oil

331
00:26:36,255 --> 00:26:38,546
and other machine components.

332
00:26:39,255 --> 00:26:40,838
Keep the engine clean!

333
00:26:41,671 --> 00:26:45,004
Dead leaves, paper dust
and oil stains

334
00:26:45,005 --> 00:26:47,837
on and around the engine

335
00:26:47,838 --> 00:26:49,255
can catch fire.

336
00:26:49,755 --> 00:26:54,088
Remove all such debris
before commencing operation.

337
00:27:18,963 --> 00:27:21,462
Wait a minute,
I can't show you this part.

338
00:27:21,463 --> 00:27:23,713
There are children in the audience,
for crying out loud!

339
00:27:24,963 --> 00:27:29,963
But I swear it was as sweet
and delicious as a heavenly dessert.

340
00:27:31,880 --> 00:27:33,629
You know that moment

341
00:27:33,630 --> 00:27:37,255
when you dip
your finger into the honey jar,

342
00:27:38,338 --> 00:27:41,421
and it's so warm and sticky.

343
00:27:42,296 --> 00:27:43,755
You can't get enough.

344
00:27:46,588 --> 00:27:52,130
Or when you're enjoying
a fluffy juicy cake

345
00:27:52,796 --> 00:27:55,796
and it just melts into your mouth.

346
00:27:58,171 --> 00:28:02,171
Then, you feel like going
for the cupcakes.

347
00:28:03,171 --> 00:28:06,213
And you play
with those perfect cherries.

348
00:28:06,921 --> 00:28:12,380
Not too big, not too small...
just right.

349
00:28:20,380 --> 00:28:22,212
Something serious must've happened

350
00:28:22,213 --> 00:28:24,754
if she was calling me
that late at night.

351
00:28:24,755 --> 00:28:26,920
But then I decided to look
on the bright side:

352
00:28:26,921 --> 00:28:28,213
Maybe she was dying.

353
00:28:28,880 --> 00:28:30,755
Now, where were we?

354
00:28:35,088 --> 00:28:37,837
Oh, yeah!
The grand finale,

355
00:28:37,838 --> 00:28:40,005
when you top it off with champagne.

356
00:28:40,713 --> 00:28:42,005
Lots of champagne.

357
00:28:43,255 --> 00:28:46,421
Especially if
the bottle's not been shaken in awhile.

358
00:28:50,838 --> 00:28:51,838
Lower...

359
00:28:53,838 --> 00:28:54,921
Lower...

360
00:28:59,921 --> 00:29:00,963
Do it!

361
00:29:02,005 --> 00:29:03,380
Do what?

362
00:29:05,505 --> 00:29:07,213
Holy... Mom!

363
00:29:08,255 --> 00:29:11,046
- What time is it?
- 10 a.m.

364
00:29:11,671 --> 00:29:15,880
Come on, get dressed,
we're missing out on tan-time.

365
00:29:18,796 --> 00:29:20,505
Just let me freshen up a bit.

366
00:29:23,296 --> 00:29:26,920
I really wanted Anemona to like me
in daytime as well.

367
00:29:26,921 --> 00:29:30,463
So I needed
a little bit of maintenance.

368
00:29:32,463 --> 00:29:33,838
I styled my hair.

369
00:29:34,963 --> 00:29:36,171
Brushed my teeth.

370
00:29:39,588 --> 00:29:41,213
Heck, I even showered!

371
00:29:47,880 --> 00:29:50,879
It was pretty obvious
that I was in a great mood,

372
00:29:50,880 --> 00:29:52,213
but what's up with my mom?

373
00:29:52,838 --> 00:29:54,880
Why is she so upbeat and cheerful?

374
00:30:02,630 --> 00:30:04,671
Hey, dude, guess what?

375
00:30:05,213 --> 00:30:07,545
I just had a date with Anemona
last night.

376
00:30:07,546 --> 00:30:10,713
And I fucked your mother last night.

377
00:30:17,088 --> 00:30:18,088
Mom?

378
00:30:21,755 --> 00:30:22,880
I don't wanna know.

379
00:30:24,880 --> 00:30:26,712
You met someone last night,
didn't you?

380
00:30:26,713 --> 00:30:28,170
Actually, I did.

381
00:30:28,171 --> 00:30:29,463
Someone I like...

382
00:30:32,755 --> 00:30:33,755
I knew it.

383
00:30:37,755 --> 00:30:39,380
But it's okay.

384
00:30:40,088 --> 00:30:43,255
- As long as you're happy.
- No, Mom. Not him.

385
00:30:44,005 --> 00:30:45,546
It's alright, Andrei.

386
00:30:46,963 --> 00:30:48,671
At least you can't get him pregnant.

387
00:30:51,880 --> 00:30:53,088
Anemona!

388
00:30:59,630 --> 00:31:00,921
What's wrong?

389
00:31:01,463 --> 00:31:03,796
- They fired me.
- What?

390
00:31:04,838 --> 00:31:08,046
My supervisor came to me this morning
and said I was fired.

391
00:31:12,713 --> 00:31:14,171
She saw you leaving my room.

392
00:31:22,130 --> 00:31:23,588
It's all my fault.

393
00:31:25,546 --> 00:31:27,088
It could have been anyone.

394
00:31:27,838 --> 00:31:30,463
Okay, there's a reality check!

395
00:31:34,005 --> 00:31:37,629
So what now?
Why are you all packed?

396
00:31:37,630 --> 00:31:39,963
Because it's over for me here.

397
00:31:41,130 --> 00:31:43,338
My boyfriend is coming
to pick me up soon.

398
00:31:46,421 --> 00:31:48,546
He can't see us together, you know?

399
00:31:49,838 --> 00:31:52,255
And the hits just keep on coming.

400
00:31:56,505 --> 00:31:58,421
I just wish we had
a little more time together.

401
00:32:00,338 --> 00:32:03,129
Alright, man up, show some grit!

402
00:32:03,130 --> 00:32:04,713
I don't want you to go.

403
00:32:07,671 --> 00:32:09,296
Please don't go.

404
00:32:10,463 --> 00:32:14,963
Apparently, my flair for the dramatic
outweighs my toughness.

405
00:32:15,671 --> 00:32:17,171
It came out like a flood!

406
00:32:17,755 --> 00:32:20,629
You know what?
Fuck that, it's my story!

407
00:32:20,630 --> 00:32:22,337
It was raining hardcore!

408
00:32:22,338 --> 00:32:25,005
It was raining
like the great flood was coming!

409
00:32:29,796 --> 00:32:31,129
We'll keep in touch.

410
00:32:31,130 --> 00:32:32,963
- I'll come visit.
- No!

411
00:32:34,296 --> 00:32:35,546
You can't, Andrei.

412
00:32:36,338 --> 00:32:38,338
You live at the other end of the country.

413
00:32:39,130 --> 00:32:40,130
This...

414
00:32:40,505 --> 00:32:41,755
Us...

415
00:32:43,296 --> 00:32:44,963
it would never work.

416
00:32:45,380 --> 00:32:46,838
Why fool ourselves?

417
00:32:54,213 --> 00:32:56,296
It's... It's from the rain.

418
00:32:59,588 --> 00:33:01,005
Hey...

419
00:33:02,671 --> 00:33:05,379
If what happened between us
was meant to be,

420
00:33:05,380 --> 00:33:07,296
I'm sure we'll meet again.

421
00:33:08,380 --> 00:33:10,630
I have faith in these kind of things.

422
00:33:12,005 --> 00:33:14,879
Just because a story
doesn't have a happy ending,

423
00:33:14,880 --> 00:33:16,338
doesn't mean that it's over.

424
00:33:41,421 --> 00:33:44,671
I take you to the beach to cheer you up
and you leave here even more depressed?

425
00:33:45,338 --> 00:33:49,295
You're being silly, Andrei! Besides,
I don't even think he's that great a guy!

426
00:33:49,296 --> 00:33:52,046
Mom! She's a girl!

427
00:33:53,213 --> 00:33:54,505
Her name is Anemona

428
00:33:55,421 --> 00:33:58,295
and she is the most beautiful girl
I've ever seen.

429
00:33:58,296 --> 00:34:00,420
Oh, yeah? That's funny.

430
00:34:00,421 --> 00:34:01,920
I was under the impression

431
00:34:01,921 --> 00:34:04,241
that your mother was
the most beautiful woman in the world.

432
00:34:04,755 --> 00:34:07,130
- What about Ramona?
- What do I care?

433
00:34:08,463 --> 00:34:11,170
All I want right now is to be
with Anemona and no one else.

434
00:34:11,171 --> 00:34:15,213
Well, good for you! That's my boy!

435
00:34:16,171 --> 00:34:20,379
I'm glad I raised me a boy who knows
exactly what he wants in life.

436
00:34:20,380 --> 00:34:21,921
That's good!

437
00:34:26,005 --> 00:34:28,546
Yeah, great...

438
00:34:30,546 --> 00:34:32,795
On second thought, I need you
to drop me off at Ramona's

439
00:34:32,796 --> 00:34:34,921
- as soon as we get there!
- What the fuck?!

440
00:34:39,213 --> 00:34:42,380
Hi there, I'm Andrei,
Ramona's classmate.

441
00:34:42,880 --> 00:34:44,046
Is your daughter home?

442
00:34:45,838 --> 00:34:47,213
Ramona is my sister.

443
00:34:48,130 --> 00:34:50,421
I may be older, but I'm not her mother!

444
00:34:51,171 --> 00:34:53,005
God! Come in.

445
00:35:07,713 --> 00:35:09,713
Are you... alright?

446
00:35:10,713 --> 00:35:12,296
Do I fucking look alright?

447
00:35:13,713 --> 00:35:15,004
Look at me!

448
00:35:15,005 --> 00:35:16,920
And is it alright for me
to call you like crazy

449
00:35:16,921 --> 00:35:19,879
and for you to ignore me like I'm nothing?

450
00:35:19,880 --> 00:35:23,546
So I didn't feel like answering
my phone. Big deal.

451
00:35:25,338 --> 00:35:27,671
What, are we together all of a sudden?

452
00:35:29,171 --> 00:35:31,213
Or maybe you're just jealous.

453
00:35:33,838 --> 00:35:35,046
Jealous of what?

454
00:35:38,088 --> 00:35:39,213
I have a girlfriend now.

455
00:35:40,338 --> 00:35:43,255
Really? What's her full name?

456
00:35:44,338 --> 00:35:46,296
I don't know it.

457
00:35:46,796 --> 00:35:48,463
What's her phone number?

458
00:35:50,838 --> 00:35:52,171
I don't have it.

459
00:35:53,380 --> 00:35:54,962
Is your girlfriend your left hand?

460
00:35:54,963 --> 00:35:56,671
Fuck you! She's real!

461
00:35:58,296 --> 00:35:59,588
I just can't prove it.

462
00:36:01,421 --> 00:36:05,213
You know, that's what they say
about aliens, and God too.

463
00:36:07,171 --> 00:36:08,545
You're just jealous.

464
00:36:08,546 --> 00:36:11,088
Jealous? Me?

465
00:36:12,005 --> 00:36:14,004
Get fucking real, Andrei!

466
00:36:14,005 --> 00:36:17,630
You're crazy about me! You always
come running like a puppy!

467
00:36:20,171 --> 00:36:21,712
I just have to lift my finger.

468
00:36:21,713 --> 00:36:23,171
- Yeah?
- Yeah!

469
00:36:25,005 --> 00:36:28,295
Well, you know what?
Suck it, Ramona!

470
00:36:28,296 --> 00:36:30,088
I don't need you in my life!

471
00:36:31,796 --> 00:36:35,255
There are... There are thousands of girls
out there way hotter than you!

472
00:36:36,421 --> 00:36:38,213
Which I haven't met yet, it's true.

473
00:36:38,963 --> 00:36:42,380
But I'm pretty fucking sure none of them
would treat me the way you do!

474
00:36:47,130 --> 00:36:49,255
I'm just your puppy. Puppy...

475
00:36:53,213 --> 00:36:54,255
Your puppy...

476
00:36:59,796 --> 00:37:02,588
I'm not that sorry Silviu beat you.

477
00:37:04,796 --> 00:37:06,255
I'll go to the police

478
00:37:08,380 --> 00:37:09,755
and tell them you did it.

479
00:37:10,296 --> 00:37:13,963
I'll tell them you left these marks
on my face.

480
00:37:16,421 --> 00:37:18,380
And see how smart
you think you are then.

481
00:37:19,796 --> 00:37:20,796
Idiot.

482
00:37:25,005 --> 00:37:25,962
And fuck off!

483
00:37:25,963 --> 00:37:27,130
What happened?

484
00:37:27,838 --> 00:37:30,046
Andrei, stop being like this!
She needs you.

485
00:37:30,963 --> 00:37:33,130
You know what?
You can suck it too!

486
00:37:34,296 --> 00:37:35,671
Okay. When?

487
00:37:39,838 --> 00:37:42,796
How could I have possibly hit Ramona?
I was at the seaside.

488
00:37:44,296 --> 00:37:45,629
Then who did?

489
00:37:45,630 --> 00:37:47,713
Scooby-Doo!
Who do you think it was?

490
00:37:49,005 --> 00:37:50,045
Silviu.

491
00:37:50,046 --> 00:37:53,420
Or maybe she did it to herself?

492
00:37:53,421 --> 00:37:56,337
Well, if it was Silviu,
why would she say it was you?

493
00:37:56,338 --> 00:37:58,755
Because Ramona
is the offspring of Satan, that's why!

494
00:38:02,046 --> 00:38:03,880
What I meant to say...

495
00:38:08,546 --> 00:38:09,962
Really, Carla? Tampons?

496
00:38:09,963 --> 00:38:11,421
It's all I had to throw.

497
00:38:25,713 --> 00:38:26,921
Cut the bullshit!

498
00:38:27,505 --> 00:38:29,712
You think that just because
you're not saying anything,

499
00:38:29,713 --> 00:38:31,005
I can't see that you're upset?

500
00:38:33,630 --> 00:38:37,171
Ramona told the school
some pretty bad lies about me,

501
00:38:38,005 --> 00:38:40,296
because I've been ignoring her.

502
00:38:41,005 --> 00:38:43,445
Well, that's what any girl would do
if she felt hurt by a guy.

503
00:38:44,255 --> 00:38:46,379
It means that she cares for you.

504
00:38:46,380 --> 00:38:47,630
Really?

505
00:38:49,671 --> 00:38:52,671
Dude, I don't get women at all!

506
00:38:54,463 --> 00:38:57,379
How come every time
I try something with a girl,

507
00:38:57,380 --> 00:38:59,545
I end up looking like a loser?

508
00:38:59,546 --> 00:39:02,463
What do you really want?
You want Ramona?

509
00:39:04,005 --> 00:39:07,921
I thought you were in love with that girl
from the beach, what's her name?

510
00:39:10,755 --> 00:39:11,838
Anemona?

511
00:39:14,296 --> 00:39:17,505
I don't have her number,
I don't have her Facebook.

512
00:39:18,588 --> 00:39:19,920
She's not to be found.

513
00:39:19,921 --> 00:39:23,295
Just because someone's not on
Facebook doesn't mean they don't exist.

514
00:39:23,296 --> 00:39:24,962
But they have Instagram.

515
00:39:24,963 --> 00:39:27,255
You can't give up just because
you're afraid of failure.

516
00:39:33,421 --> 00:39:36,795
Hey, don't judge me!
I was 17 and single!

517
00:39:36,796 --> 00:39:40,171
What did you want me to use
the Internet for? Learning history?

518
00:39:44,838 --> 00:39:47,712
She forgot her wallet in my taxi
a few days back

519
00:39:47,713 --> 00:39:49,463
so I'm trying to give it to her in person.

520
00:39:52,463 --> 00:39:53,463
Hello?

521
00:39:54,755 --> 00:39:55,755
Hi, Anemona!

522
00:39:56,755 --> 00:39:57,755
It's Andrei.

523
00:39:58,963 --> 00:40:00,755
I sang to you on the beach.

524
00:40:02,130 --> 00:40:04,255
You'll have to be more specific
than that.

525
00:40:04,921 --> 00:40:07,504
I've had lots of boys singing to me
on the beach.

526
00:40:07,505 --> 00:40:10,296
I'm kidding, Andrei! How are things?
What's up?

527
00:40:11,463 --> 00:40:14,338
It's all good, I'm good.

528
00:40:15,255 --> 00:40:18,212
Listen, I'll be at the seaside
for a couple of days...

529
00:40:18,213 --> 00:40:23,462
and I was thinking that maybe
we can grab a coffee sometime?

530
00:40:23,463 --> 00:40:27,170
Sure, that sounds nice.
Where are you gonna stay?

531
00:40:27,171 --> 00:40:28,712
I'll find a decent hotel.

532
00:40:28,713 --> 00:40:31,046
Nonsense! You can crash with me.

533
00:40:32,338 --> 00:40:34,420
Play hard to get.

534
00:40:34,421 --> 00:40:35,421
Sure.

535
00:40:35,838 --> 00:40:38,213
Sure, I... If you insist.

536
00:41:33,588 --> 00:41:35,130
Let me show you something.

537
00:41:51,880 --> 00:41:52,880
Hey?

538
00:41:57,463 --> 00:41:58,921
Are you constipated?

539
00:42:02,588 --> 00:42:04,380
This is so good.

540
00:42:06,171 --> 00:42:07,171
I'm coming!

541
00:42:08,088 --> 00:42:10,921
- I'm coming!
- Just hurry the hell up and get out!

542
00:42:34,880 --> 00:42:35,921
Open the door!

543
00:42:41,088 --> 00:42:43,712
Open the door or I will break it in!

544
00:42:43,713 --> 00:42:45,545
- No, I'm gonna go.
- No, I'm going.

545
00:42:45,546 --> 00:42:47,462
- You're in the girls' bathroom.
- So what?

546
00:42:47,463 --> 00:42:49,838
- Let me go!
- I'll go. You stay here, okay?

547
00:42:50,546 --> 00:42:52,170
- You trust me?
- Yes.

548
00:42:52,171 --> 00:42:53,630
Okay, I'll go then.

549
00:42:55,338 --> 00:42:56,380
Okay.

550
00:43:02,796 --> 00:43:06,630
- Out! I wanna talk to this guy.
- I'm not leaving without him.

551
00:43:09,046 --> 00:43:10,338
Out now!

552
00:43:10,963 --> 00:43:13,755
It's okay. I'll be fine.

553
00:43:14,338 --> 00:43:16,837
I'm only just about to be murdered,
that's all.

554
00:43:16,838 --> 00:43:20,588
Okay, little man,
I'm gonna ask you one question.

555
00:43:21,921 --> 00:43:24,713
And you better god damn well think hard
about the answer!

556
00:43:26,380 --> 00:43:28,505
Were you fucking in here?

557
00:43:32,130 --> 00:43:36,046
Regretfully, yes, kind sir.

558
00:43:36,838 --> 00:43:40,088
And I honestly didn't even enjoy it
all that much.

559
00:43:40,880 --> 00:43:44,338
Man to man, I congratulate you!

560
00:43:46,046 --> 00:43:48,255
As a bouncer...
wrong motherfucking answer!

561
00:43:49,088 --> 00:43:52,755
It was at this moment that he knew.
He fucked up!

562
00:43:57,546 --> 00:44:01,630
- Ow!
- Oh, God, this is totally my fault.

563
00:44:03,546 --> 00:44:05,796
Don't worry about it. It was worth it.

564
00:44:08,380 --> 00:44:12,462
I think I might have an idea

565
00:44:12,463 --> 00:44:15,296
that will make you feel even better.

566
00:44:23,338 --> 00:44:25,880
And that's when I understood
the meaning of life.

567
00:44:26,380 --> 00:44:28,046
You...

568
00:44:30,630 --> 00:44:32,546
Blowjobs.

569
00:44:33,921 --> 00:44:39,004
That night I helped her
with an IT problem.

570
00:44:39,005 --> 00:44:45,213
She had a beautiful pink laptop
with a very nice USB port.

571
00:44:46,755 --> 00:44:50,588
My USB stick was... average and...

572
00:44:52,005 --> 00:44:55,546
Wait a minute, it's my damn story!

573
00:44:56,546 --> 00:44:58,838
That USB stick was huge!

574
00:45:03,171 --> 00:45:08,045
I was ready to fit that huge USB
into her rear-mounted VGA,

575
00:45:08,046 --> 00:45:12,380
but yeah, she said she wasn't ready
for that quite yet.

576
00:45:15,421 --> 00:45:16,505
So...

577
00:45:19,088 --> 00:45:21,213
Did you think about
what you're gonna tell him?

578
00:45:22,755 --> 00:45:25,005
I mean... your boyfriend.

579
00:45:26,671 --> 00:45:27,796
About us.

580
00:45:33,463 --> 00:45:35,046
There is no "us," Andrei.

581
00:45:36,963 --> 00:45:38,171
Say what?

582
00:45:41,005 --> 00:45:46,880
I'm with Tudor and I really don't wanna
have this conversation right now.

583
00:46:03,213 --> 00:46:05,880
Can we just rewind there a little bit?

584
00:46:07,963 --> 00:46:10,838
I fell in love with you
from the first moment I saw you!

585
00:46:13,255 --> 00:46:15,005
You're a really good person, Andrei.

586
00:46:15,755 --> 00:46:17,754
I never thought I'd meet
someone like you.

587
00:46:17,755 --> 00:46:20,838
- But apparently not good enough.
- It's not that! It's just...

588
00:46:22,171 --> 00:46:27,588
I'm fucked up, okay?
You're better off, believe me.

589
00:46:30,546 --> 00:46:34,046
- Can't I be the one to decide that?
- There is nothing to decide!

590
00:46:44,630 --> 00:46:47,796
Tudor and I have been together
for a really long time.

591
00:46:50,588 --> 00:46:55,588
He is older, he is rich, he has plans.

592
00:46:58,046 --> 00:46:59,463
- He's been good to me.
- Okay!

593
00:47:01,088 --> 00:47:02,380
You can stop right there.

594
00:47:07,130 --> 00:47:08,963
I can't walk away from him.

595
00:47:17,255 --> 00:47:19,130
But you can walk away from me.

596
00:47:21,171 --> 00:47:22,796
You can walk away from me.

597
00:47:26,046 --> 00:47:27,088
This is...

598
00:47:28,796 --> 00:47:29,796
I...

599
00:47:32,505 --> 00:47:33,546
Fuck it.

600
00:47:38,213 --> 00:47:40,630
It's how it is. Life sucks.

601
00:47:44,463 --> 00:47:46,046
Maybe you shouldn't have come here.

602
00:47:50,046 --> 00:47:52,338
Don't say that. Don't.

603
00:47:58,130 --> 00:47:59,296
This was all wrong.

604
00:48:06,588 --> 00:48:07,755
But I love you.

605
00:48:08,421 --> 00:48:09,671
You have to go.

606
00:48:44,588 --> 00:48:46,504
The only thing that she didn't realize

607
00:48:46,505 --> 00:48:51,505
was that I didn't fall in love with her
because I thought she was perfect.

608
00:48:52,421 --> 00:48:56,337
I fell in love with her
because I knew she wasn't.

609
00:48:56,338 --> 00:48:59,920
When you're young
and get kicked in the balls,

610
00:48:59,921 --> 00:49:01,087
everybody tells you,

611
00:49:01,088 --> 00:49:04,088
"Ah, you'll be fine!
You'll find a non-ball-kicker soon."

612
00:49:05,046 --> 00:49:07,337
They all tell you how it will pass,

613
00:49:07,338 --> 00:49:11,171
how it doesn't really matter
what happens right now.

614
00:49:21,088 --> 00:49:23,171
Fuck it, I always choose the wrong girls!

615
00:49:23,963 --> 00:49:26,504
One of them is fucking my best friend,

616
00:49:26,505 --> 00:49:29,130
and the other one
has a fucking boyfriend!

617
00:49:34,088 --> 00:49:35,880
What the fuck are you looking at?

618
00:49:39,463 --> 00:49:41,963
It's nothing. It's just...

619
00:49:43,255 --> 00:49:47,087
We wanted to tell you that we found out
the truth about you

620
00:49:47,088 --> 00:49:49,921
and we totally think you're very brave.

621
00:49:50,963 --> 00:49:52,629
What the fuck are you talking about?

622
00:49:52,630 --> 00:49:56,962
Ramona told us that Andrei didn't want
to have sex with her that night

623
00:49:56,963 --> 00:50:00,462
because he confessed
that he likes men.

624
00:50:00,463 --> 00:50:04,045
- What?
- Hey, it's okay.

625
00:50:04,046 --> 00:50:07,963
If that's what you all think,
then you can all suck my dick!

626
00:50:09,880 --> 00:50:12,587
Maybe not the wisest choice of words
in this context.

627
00:50:12,588 --> 00:50:14,087
Yeah? Fuck you too!

628
00:50:14,088 --> 00:50:16,670
Again... So gay!

629
00:50:16,671 --> 00:50:19,795
If I'm gay, then you can all kiss my ass!

630
00:50:19,796 --> 00:50:20,963
Andrei, relax!

631
00:50:21,963 --> 00:50:25,546
Everything makes sense now,
and we're all okay with this.

632
00:50:26,296 --> 00:50:27,296
Even the teachers.

633
00:50:30,005 --> 00:50:31,338
The teachers know?

634
00:50:38,213 --> 00:50:42,921
If you ever decide to break up
with this loser, give me a call.

635
00:50:44,338 --> 00:50:45,380
Fuck off.

636
00:50:46,505 --> 00:50:48,046
You stupid jackass!

637
00:50:50,213 --> 00:50:53,338
And you...
Stop sucking on this fucking ice cream.

638
00:50:59,380 --> 00:51:00,463
Remember this...

639
00:51:01,296 --> 00:51:04,421
If a woman gives herself to you,

640
00:51:05,421 --> 00:51:08,421
she tells you that she wants to fuck you

641
00:51:09,088 --> 00:51:12,087
and... you don't fuck her

642
00:51:12,088 --> 00:51:14,046
'cause you're...

643
00:51:14,588 --> 00:51:17,630
you're retarded or something...

644
00:51:19,171 --> 00:51:20,338
she will make you suffer.

645
00:51:20,880 --> 00:51:23,504
Sure. Just let me press
the "go back in time" button

646
00:51:23,505 --> 00:51:24,963
and I'll totally fuck Ramona.

647
00:51:25,588 --> 00:51:27,712
What the fuck
do you want me to do now?

648
00:51:27,713 --> 00:51:30,963
Well, for starters...
Deal with that shit.

649
00:51:31,963 --> 00:51:36,005
Make everybody stop thinking that
you're an insecure gay nerd and a loser.

650
00:51:36,505 --> 00:51:38,505
Hey, I am not a loser!

651
00:51:44,963 --> 00:51:47,254
So now everybody thinks that I'm gay,

652
00:51:47,255 --> 00:51:49,213
the girl I used to like
wants to make me suffer,

653
00:51:50,005 --> 00:51:51,920
the girl I love has a boyfriend...

654
00:51:51,921 --> 00:51:54,712
It's like somebody is strangling my soul

655
00:51:54,713 --> 00:51:58,379
while making me listen
to Britney Spears.

656
00:51:58,380 --> 00:52:00,962
Yes, horrible.

657
00:52:00,963 --> 00:52:05,963
Does life condemn us to be alone
forever if we don't want to be hurt?

658
00:52:06,713 --> 00:52:12,587
Or should we love even though we may cry
and suffer and be unhappy?

659
00:52:12,588 --> 00:52:15,755
Man, you want ketchup or mayonnaise?

660
00:52:17,796 --> 00:52:18,796
Jesus...

661
00:52:21,755 --> 00:52:24,630
How could she say I am gay?

662
00:52:26,588 --> 00:52:30,921
Apparently, the only person
who would still listen to me was Carla.

663
00:52:32,463 --> 00:52:33,588
I like women.

664
00:52:34,255 --> 00:52:38,380
I live to eat pussy.

665
00:52:42,755 --> 00:52:44,880
So you wanna...

666
00:52:48,671 --> 00:52:50,005
No, I...

667
00:52:52,255 --> 00:52:57,380
I just want to forget
about women and love.

668
00:53:05,171 --> 00:53:06,796
Well, this is interesting,

669
00:53:11,880 --> 00:53:14,421
I have 11 fingers.

670
00:53:18,755 --> 00:53:20,130
I'm not kidding.

671
00:53:21,296 --> 00:53:26,129
Look, it's...
one, two, three, four, five...

672
00:53:26,130 --> 00:53:30,046
ten, nine, eight, seven, six...

673
00:53:33,005 --> 00:53:36,296
Five plus six equals 11.

674
00:53:36,921 --> 00:53:38,880
My math teacher
must've been very proud.

675
00:53:51,130 --> 00:53:52,171
Too much banana.

676
00:53:52,963 --> 00:53:55,005
Stop tripping.

677
00:53:58,005 --> 00:53:59,046
I know.

678
00:54:00,130 --> 00:54:04,171
Maybe if you take off your shirt,
you'll feel better.

679
00:54:16,755 --> 00:54:18,505
Yeah, you're right.

680
00:54:20,421 --> 00:54:23,755
- I do feel better.
- Good boy.

681
00:54:24,755 --> 00:54:27,505
Now let's get rid of those trousers too.

682
00:54:29,463 --> 00:54:31,380
What's wrong with my trousers?

683
00:54:32,171 --> 00:54:35,879
I don't know,
you wanted to take off your trousers.

684
00:54:35,880 --> 00:54:39,671
- Man, you're really high.
- No, I'm not.

685
00:54:41,213 --> 00:54:43,255
You think I don't know my own idea?

686
00:54:46,296 --> 00:54:50,254
Maybe if you lie down,
you'll feel even better.

687
00:54:50,255 --> 00:54:52,838
I don't honestly think it's such a good...

688
00:55:12,588 --> 00:55:16,837
And in that moment I finally
understood how Leo DiCaprio felt

689
00:55:16,838 --> 00:55:19,338
when he fucked... fought...

690
00:55:20,255 --> 00:55:21,630
...fought the bear!

691
00:55:28,796 --> 00:55:30,630
That was awesome!

692
00:55:32,755 --> 00:55:34,505
I'm gonna go take a shit now.

693
00:55:39,921 --> 00:55:43,546
Don't worry, lover! I'll be back!

694
00:55:54,880 --> 00:55:56,088
Lover!

695
00:55:58,671 --> 00:55:59,921
I'm coming!

696
00:56:02,588 --> 00:56:06,171
You know, maybe running away
from your problems is wrong.

697
00:56:11,630 --> 00:56:16,295
But when your problem's
a 400-pound sex-crazed hyena

698
00:56:16,296 --> 00:56:17,505
who only wants more...

699
00:56:18,171 --> 00:56:20,380
Yeah, you might wanna
keep on running!

700
00:56:28,630 --> 00:56:31,546
Good morning, sir!
I'm Captain Donger.

701
00:56:36,588 --> 00:56:38,880
Baby, are you sleeping?

702
00:56:43,713 --> 00:56:46,130
Come on, sweetie, wake up, please.

703
00:56:50,838 --> 00:56:52,045
Get up, you lazy fart!

704
00:56:52,046 --> 00:56:54,088
It's 12 o'clock, wake up already!

705
00:56:55,338 --> 00:56:56,546
That's my boy.

706
00:56:57,046 --> 00:56:58,380
Alin's come to visit.

707
00:56:59,088 --> 00:57:02,630
And he came with the Russians?
Why the hell are you yelling?

708
00:57:09,796 --> 00:57:10,796
Andrei...

709
00:57:11,796 --> 00:57:15,255
I'm very sorry, but...
I have to break up with you.

710
00:57:16,796 --> 00:57:20,255
- Are you high?
- Yeah, a bit, yeah...

711
00:57:21,338 --> 00:57:22,618
...but that's besides the point.

712
00:57:25,130 --> 00:57:26,920
What the hell are you talking about?

713
00:57:26,921 --> 00:57:28,963
Dude, we got to do something.

714
00:57:30,380 --> 00:57:34,588
Last night, I was out

715
00:57:36,005 --> 00:57:39,630
talking to some chick and...

716
00:57:40,921 --> 00:57:47,463
every girl in this city thinks that I'm...

717
00:57:52,505 --> 00:57:54,505
Well, at least you didn't bone
Jabba the Hutt!

718
00:57:55,255 --> 00:57:58,296
You know what's ten times
fucking worse?

719
00:57:59,588 --> 00:58:01,255
They think I'm your boyfriend.

720
00:58:02,713 --> 00:58:03,880
I feel you, bro.

721
00:58:05,963 --> 00:58:09,255
And you're right.
I hate Ramona for the whole thing,

722
00:58:10,213 --> 00:58:13,213
but last night I made up my mind.

723
00:58:13,921 --> 00:58:16,629
I am going to show her and Silviu

724
00:58:16,630 --> 00:58:19,087
that I am not the loser they think I am!

725
00:58:19,088 --> 00:58:20,212
Okay, you're overreacting.

726
00:58:20,213 --> 00:58:22,337
So many years,

727
00:58:22,338 --> 00:58:25,463
but today is the day I say "No more!"

728
00:58:26,046 --> 00:58:30,045
- Dude...
- I refuse to be Ramona's lapdog!

729
00:58:30,046 --> 00:58:33,295
- Hey, asshole!
- And the most important thing of all...

730
00:58:33,296 --> 00:58:37,088
I refuse to have sex
with another fat girl!

731
00:58:37,671 --> 00:58:38,962
Wait, what?

732
00:58:38,963 --> 00:58:41,545
Andrei!

733
00:58:41,546 --> 00:58:45,004
Andrei!

734
00:58:45,005 --> 00:58:49,130
Dude! Chill the fuck out, you shitheel!

735
00:58:51,421 --> 00:58:54,296
- I overreacted a bit.
- You think?

736
00:59:00,255 --> 00:59:04,338
But seriously, though,
I will have my revenge!

737
00:59:05,380 --> 00:59:09,213
If I wanted to impress Ramona,
I needed a "look."

738
00:59:13,005 --> 00:59:14,380
I began hittin' the gym.

739
00:59:15,255 --> 00:59:17,254
Not for working out or anything,

740
00:59:17,255 --> 00:59:18,921
exercise is way overrated!

741
00:59:19,796 --> 00:59:22,796
I needed some badass pics
so that Ramona could see them.

742
00:59:24,213 --> 00:59:27,421
Everyone found out
that Alin and I weren't gay.

743
00:59:27,963 --> 00:59:32,046
Alin should've been tickled pink that
people thought I was his boyfriend.

744
00:59:33,088 --> 00:59:35,046
I was finally ready.

745
00:59:35,713 --> 00:59:38,962
Execute Operation Ramona!

746
00:59:38,963 --> 00:59:41,838
Hey, look who just saw my instastory.

747
01:00:29,171 --> 01:00:33,380
Ramona didn't just see me,
that "biatch" felt me!

748
01:00:52,505 --> 01:00:54,630
Hey, Andrei, how have you been?

749
01:01:01,088 --> 01:01:02,963
Don't say a word.

750
01:01:15,755 --> 01:01:17,380
Just let me look at you for a second.

751
01:01:23,130 --> 01:01:25,921
You're still the most beautiful girl
I've ever seen.

752
01:01:36,963 --> 01:01:38,171
God, I missed you.

753
01:01:40,005 --> 01:01:42,088
At that moment, I was sure

754
01:01:42,838 --> 01:01:45,463
even her soul wanted to fuck me.

755
01:01:46,380 --> 01:01:47,671
You look different.

756
01:01:51,963 --> 01:01:53,005
I like it.

757
01:01:53,963 --> 01:01:55,504
Of course you do.

758
01:01:55,505 --> 01:01:57,296
A little bit arrogant, don't you think?

759
01:01:58,546 --> 01:02:00,421
It's only arrogance if it's not true.

760
01:02:02,255 --> 01:02:04,296
And we both know it is true.

761
01:02:11,296 --> 01:02:12,421
Listen.

762
01:02:13,880 --> 01:02:15,213
I got to bounce,

763
01:02:17,546 --> 01:02:19,588
but maybe come over to my house
one night,

764
01:02:20,463 --> 01:02:21,921
watch a movie...

765
01:02:22,546 --> 01:02:25,963
You know, Netflix and chill.

766
01:02:26,796 --> 01:02:30,171
Yeah, smooth
as a bull in a china shop.

767
01:02:31,130 --> 01:02:35,005
I don't know,
we're not that close anymore.

768
01:02:36,338 --> 01:02:37,796
And whose fault is it?

769
01:02:55,088 --> 01:02:57,755
50 Shades of Andrei!

770
01:03:00,630 --> 01:03:02,421
See you later, little goose.

771
01:03:04,338 --> 01:03:08,463
Now that I'd planted the seed
in her head, all I had to do was wait.

772
01:03:08,963 --> 01:03:14,171
If everything went as planned, maybe
I could also plant my seed in her.

773
01:03:18,046 --> 01:03:21,379
Ramona started acting differently
towards me all of a sudden.

774
01:03:21,380 --> 01:03:22,420
You know...

775
01:03:22,421 --> 01:03:24,837
Hey! What's up?

776
01:03:24,838 --> 01:03:26,630
...like I was an actual human being!

777
01:03:32,880 --> 01:03:37,380
Apparently, we were now on kissing
terms whenever we saw each other.

778
01:03:42,505 --> 01:03:45,005
The plan was working like a charm.

779
01:03:45,671 --> 01:03:49,045
But there was something else
I had to do first.

780
01:03:49,046 --> 01:03:50,130
You fucking pussy!

781
01:03:51,755 --> 01:03:52,838
Jesus Christ!

782
01:03:53,671 --> 01:03:56,129
What's wrong with you? Hey!

783
01:03:56,130 --> 01:03:57,295
- What?
- What?

784
01:03:57,296 --> 01:03:58,630
- What?
- Hey!

785
01:04:01,630 --> 01:04:02,713
Carla!

786
01:04:06,796 --> 01:04:08,630
I need to tell you something.

787
01:04:12,838 --> 01:04:14,338
Please don't eat me!

788
01:04:17,171 --> 01:04:21,338
Look, I know we haven't talked
all that much since...

789
01:04:23,046 --> 01:04:24,337
You know...

790
01:04:24,338 --> 01:04:28,379
Since you ran like a little girl
leaving me unsatisfied?

791
01:04:28,380 --> 01:04:30,880
Yeah, I think I remember.

792
01:04:32,255 --> 01:04:33,337
Well, that's the thing!

793
01:04:33,338 --> 01:04:39,296
You are the most wonderful girl
I've ever seen.

794
01:04:40,380 --> 01:04:43,420
- Andrei, I can't believe this!
- No, no, no, just...

795
01:04:43,421 --> 01:04:45,421
Don't get me wrong!

796
01:04:45,921 --> 01:04:49,713
I enjoyed our night together,
but that's it.

797
01:04:50,588 --> 01:04:53,545
I like you more like just a friend.

798
01:04:53,546 --> 01:04:55,837
What? Come again?

799
01:04:55,838 --> 01:04:57,963
Did I just get friend zoned
by Jabba the Hutt?

800
01:05:02,296 --> 01:05:05,046
You know, it won't be easy...

801
01:05:06,671 --> 01:05:13,796
but I will try to get over
this disappointment somehow.

802
01:05:18,255 --> 01:05:19,838
But know this...

803
01:05:20,755 --> 01:05:26,588
I will never ever forget about you.

804
01:05:27,671 --> 01:05:31,587
Kind of like the same way the Titanic
will never ever forget

805
01:05:31,588 --> 01:05:33,130
hitting that iceberg.

806
01:05:33,713 --> 01:05:37,255
You are so sweet, Andrei!

807
01:05:45,921 --> 01:05:46,921
Pussy!

808
01:05:50,796 --> 01:05:51,796
Bye!

809
01:05:58,588 --> 01:06:00,505
Guys, I know what I'm doing, okay?

810
01:06:17,755 --> 01:06:20,170
Hey, Silviu,
did you do your math homework?

811
01:06:20,171 --> 01:06:21,754
Let me check.

812
01:06:21,755 --> 01:06:25,546
Yo, peasant!
Did we do my math homework?

813
01:06:26,171 --> 01:06:27,546
Of course, boss.

814
01:06:31,130 --> 01:06:32,171
Four pages.

815
01:06:34,671 --> 01:06:36,088
- Thanks.
- You're welcome.

816
01:06:52,046 --> 01:06:53,088
Silviu!

817
01:07:00,463 --> 01:07:01,463
Yes!

818
01:07:03,130 --> 01:07:04,255
Yes what?

819
01:07:07,630 --> 01:07:10,005
Yes, I would love to be your girlfriend!

820
01:07:12,713 --> 01:07:14,837
What the fuck are you talking about?

821
01:07:14,838 --> 01:07:18,129
I got your flowers
and I read your note too.

822
01:07:18,130 --> 01:07:20,505
You know,
from the ninth grade I hoped...

823
01:07:21,338 --> 01:07:23,880
No, I knew that we would be together
one day.

824
01:07:28,963 --> 01:07:30,462
Are you high?

825
01:07:30,463 --> 01:07:35,421
How the fuck do you think
you could ever be my girlfriend?

826
01:07:36,171 --> 01:07:39,130
Don't you realize that you are
as fat as a hippo?

827
01:07:40,463 --> 01:07:43,796
Get lost, bitch!
You're making me look bad.

828
01:07:44,921 --> 01:07:46,255
Really?

829
01:07:47,046 --> 01:07:50,837
But last year I was good enough
for you to lose your virginity to, right?

830
01:07:50,838 --> 01:07:51,754
What?

831
01:07:51,755 --> 01:07:53,754
I thought we agreed
not to talk about that.

832
01:07:53,755 --> 01:07:55,295
Motherfucker!

833
01:07:55,296 --> 01:08:00,962
I let you defile my sweet cherry,
and this is how you repay me?

834
01:08:00,963 --> 01:08:02,546
Fight!

835
01:08:07,338 --> 01:08:08,880
Fight!

836
01:08:16,255 --> 01:08:18,713
Shot! Headshot!

837
01:08:33,963 --> 01:08:36,505
Look at him crying like a little baby!

838
01:08:37,296 --> 01:08:38,545
The same way he did

839
01:08:38,546 --> 01:08:42,005
after we had sex
and you asked me to cuddle you!

840
01:08:46,088 --> 01:08:47,921
So, we meet tonight as planned?

841
01:08:49,671 --> 01:08:51,046
Wear something comfortable.

842
01:09:09,921 --> 01:09:11,045
Wow!

843
01:09:11,046 --> 01:09:12,796
Oh, cut it out!

844
01:09:13,296 --> 01:09:16,213
- I'm blushing.
- No, really, I'm amazed.

845
01:09:17,338 --> 01:09:19,338
This is what you understand
by "comfortable"?

846
01:09:20,088 --> 01:09:22,796
What? My outfit isn't appropriate?

847
01:09:23,213 --> 01:09:25,796
Yes, it is. For a party...

848
01:09:35,963 --> 01:09:37,296
The fuck?

849
01:09:37,838 --> 01:09:39,421
- Are you okay?
- Yeah.

850
01:09:41,546 --> 01:09:44,838
Nothing will happen to you!
Totally got your back!

851
01:09:49,296 --> 01:09:52,963
All we have to do is climb a few stairs
and we'll arrive at our destination.

852
01:09:59,046 --> 01:10:00,755
"Climb a few stairs..."

853
01:10:01,963 --> 01:10:03,504
Are you fucking kidding me?

854
01:10:03,505 --> 01:10:06,880
What is this,
a date or the fucking Olympics?

855
01:10:14,713 --> 01:10:16,630
See? It's not that bad.

856
01:10:18,171 --> 01:10:19,713
I can barely see where I'm stepping.

857
01:10:21,921 --> 01:10:23,755
And you're staring at my ass.

858
01:10:27,255 --> 01:10:28,255
Fuck!

859
01:10:53,505 --> 01:10:55,671
I wanted to bring you
somewhere very special for me.

860
01:10:56,880 --> 01:10:59,130
Here is where I come and read
from time to time.

861
01:11:00,005 --> 01:11:02,587
I did want to have dinner
with you tonight,

862
01:11:02,588 --> 01:11:07,087
but I figured a restaurant wouldn't be
good enough for me to tell you

863
01:11:07,088 --> 01:11:11,088
that you are the most beautiful girl
in the world

864
01:11:12,796 --> 01:11:16,838
and being here, you can see yourself
the way I see you...

865
01:11:23,421 --> 01:11:25,088
above everybody else.

866
01:11:36,755 --> 01:11:41,255
Here's to... second chances.

867
01:11:43,130 --> 01:11:44,130
Cheers!

868
01:11:50,755 --> 01:11:52,921
Everything is starting
to make sense now.

869
01:11:55,796 --> 01:11:59,587
I'm beginning to understand
what really matters in life and...

870
01:11:59,588 --> 01:12:00,671
Me too!

871
01:12:02,546 --> 01:12:05,880
Like beer, FIFA, chocolate.

872
01:12:08,755 --> 01:12:14,630
I meant like...
protection, support, loyalty.

873
01:12:19,755 --> 01:12:21,338
I feel amazing right now.

874
01:12:22,755 --> 01:12:24,088
I feel amazing with you.

875
01:12:34,796 --> 01:12:37,046
I feel amazing with you too.

876
01:12:41,130 --> 01:12:43,505
And I also got to stare at your ass.

877
01:13:01,130 --> 01:13:02,130
You know,

878
01:13:03,213 --> 01:13:05,129
it's getting chilly outside and...

879
01:13:05,130 --> 01:13:09,005
your place is very close to here.

880
01:13:10,588 --> 01:13:12,963
You wouldn't want to catch a cold,
right?

881
01:13:15,046 --> 01:13:16,255
Of course.

882
01:13:17,963 --> 01:13:21,338
Maybe watch a movie, right?

883
01:13:24,338 --> 01:13:26,255
You're all the same after all,
aren't you?

884
01:13:28,296 --> 01:13:30,796
I'm not like the other guys
and you know it.

885
01:13:31,380 --> 01:13:32,588
Yeah, right.

886
01:13:40,588 --> 01:13:44,838
Guy in the fourth row,
now's the time, buddy. Enjoy!

887
01:15:27,296 --> 01:15:28,921
Nice fur!

888
01:15:37,130 --> 01:15:39,462
I told you I'm not like the other guys.

889
01:15:39,463 --> 01:15:42,213
Nothing will happen tonight.
Goodnight!

890
01:15:48,671 --> 01:15:50,088
Don't try this at home.

891
01:16:16,838 --> 01:16:17,963
Morning!

892
01:16:27,880 --> 01:16:31,088
I realized that nobody cares for me
the way you do...

893
01:16:32,963 --> 01:16:37,213
and I'm sorry for all the bad things
I've done to you.

894
01:16:39,088 --> 01:16:42,213
And that was the exact moment
when Hell began to freeze over.

895
01:16:51,130 --> 01:16:53,130
All I want is another chance.

896
01:16:54,046 --> 01:16:55,755
Give us this chance.

897
01:16:56,963 --> 01:16:59,962
I know it's weird,
but I was kind of enjoying the moment.

898
01:16:59,963 --> 01:17:03,587
After all, I was in love with the girl
for practically forever,

899
01:17:03,588 --> 01:17:06,462
and now she was asking
me to be with her.

900
01:17:06,463 --> 01:17:09,171
Wow, impossible is nothing, I guess!

901
01:17:30,338 --> 01:17:32,587
I really want this to work between us.

902
01:17:32,588 --> 01:17:35,921
Me too!
Me too, and I know it will all work out.

903
01:17:48,463 --> 01:17:49,546
What's wrong?

904
01:17:58,463 --> 01:17:59,713
I have to go.

905
01:18:00,588 --> 01:18:03,088
What, now? Where?

906
01:18:03,630 --> 01:18:06,337
Please, brain,
give me a good excuse!

907
01:18:06,338 --> 01:18:07,421
Well...

908
01:18:08,671 --> 01:18:10,130
The thing is...

909
01:18:11,463 --> 01:18:14,754
I... have another girlfriend.

910
01:18:14,755 --> 01:18:15,920
Wow...

911
01:18:15,921 --> 01:18:17,546
- What?
- Fuck you, brain!

912
01:18:18,421 --> 01:18:19,541
You have another girlfriend?

913
01:18:23,130 --> 01:18:27,545
Yes. She's at the bus station
and I have to pick her up.

914
01:18:27,546 --> 01:18:30,630
Sometimes it's just better
to tell the truth...

915
01:18:34,630 --> 01:18:36,005
That's a good one!

916
01:18:37,255 --> 01:18:40,796
...because nobody will ever believe
that it can be that stupid.

917
01:18:41,880 --> 01:18:43,546
Holy shit!

918
01:18:45,963 --> 01:18:49,171
Sure! I understand.

919
01:18:51,630 --> 01:18:54,380
Gotta go pick up your "girlfriend."

920
01:18:55,671 --> 01:18:58,004
- You sure about that?
- Sure, baby.

921
01:18:58,005 --> 01:18:59,588
You got to do what you got to do.

922
01:19:00,296 --> 01:19:02,171
Go pick her up...

923
01:19:03,255 --> 01:19:05,421
okay. I will.

924
01:19:11,005 --> 01:19:12,588
You can be honest with me.

925
01:19:17,171 --> 01:19:19,796
Even princesses need to shit,
you know.

926
01:19:22,463 --> 01:19:24,879
You got me, you really got me!

927
01:19:24,880 --> 01:19:27,920
But I really need to go. Like now.

928
01:19:27,921 --> 01:19:29,130
Yeah, go!

929
01:20:38,755 --> 01:20:40,921
What is wrong with all the people
in your town?

930
01:20:41,630 --> 01:20:43,213
Why are they all dancing?

931
01:20:45,255 --> 01:20:46,713
We get high a lot.

932
01:20:47,588 --> 01:20:49,545
He's so sweet, I like a lot...

933
01:20:49,546 --> 01:20:53,213
Mom always knew how to make me
look like a stud in front of the girls.

934
01:20:55,171 --> 01:20:57,754
I know. Do you know,
when he was about that age,

935
01:20:57,755 --> 01:20:59,004
he was about one years old,

936
01:20:59,005 --> 01:21:02,004
he... every time we put him in the bath,
he pooped.

937
01:21:02,005 --> 01:21:03,920
- What? No!
- Yeah!

938
01:21:03,921 --> 01:21:06,379
Yeah, just put him in the bath
and out came a poo.

939
01:21:06,380 --> 01:21:07,920
I don't know what it was.

940
01:21:07,921 --> 01:21:11,504
It was something about the warm water,
just kinda got his bowels going,

941
01:21:11,505 --> 01:21:13,795
- so he just took a shit.
- That's horrible.

942
01:21:13,796 --> 01:21:15,545
A little turd in the pool.

943
01:21:15,546 --> 01:21:18,755
Every day for about six months,
he pooed in the bath.

944
01:21:19,296 --> 01:21:21,045
Oh, my god! That's so gross!

945
01:21:21,046 --> 01:21:23,212
It was just when he was starting
to walk as well,

946
01:21:23,213 --> 01:21:26,213
so he'd just stand up in the bath
and just like "bluuup."

947
01:21:29,213 --> 01:21:31,545
- I know.
- Oh, God. Poor mother...

948
01:21:31,546 --> 01:21:32,837
I know!

949
01:21:32,838 --> 01:21:37,295
- What did you do with that?
- Well, at the beginning... winky, winky.

950
01:21:37,296 --> 01:21:39,421
Your poor guests.

951
01:21:40,380 --> 01:21:42,421
Hey! What happened?

952
01:21:43,088 --> 01:21:44,754
Fuck you, that's what happened!

953
01:21:44,755 --> 01:21:48,004
You leave me in the middle of the road
and then you don't say anything?

954
01:21:48,005 --> 01:21:49,379
Really?

955
01:21:49,380 --> 01:21:50,837
I'm sorry,

956
01:21:50,838 --> 01:21:52,462
but I was kind of busy.

957
01:21:52,463 --> 01:21:55,879
For six hours?
I thought you'd died on that toilet seat.

958
01:21:55,880 --> 01:21:58,420
I'll make up for this, I promise.

959
01:21:58,421 --> 01:22:03,755
Tonight, when you go out with me,
you'll bring me lilies.

960
01:22:04,380 --> 01:22:08,170
Oh, tonight...
I don't think I can make it tonight.

961
01:22:08,171 --> 01:22:12,505
- I... I have a thing.
- Okay, tomorrow night then.

962
01:22:13,088 --> 01:22:14,255
Tomorrow night...

963
01:22:15,213 --> 01:22:18,213
It doesn't really work for me,
I have to see a guy.

964
01:22:18,755 --> 01:22:20,129
What guy?

965
01:22:20,130 --> 01:22:21,713
My aunt's nephew.

966
01:22:22,921 --> 01:22:24,130
You have to meet yourself?

967
01:22:25,213 --> 01:22:26,963
Damn, brain, what the fuck?

968
01:22:30,671 --> 01:22:32,755
Andrei, is there something wrong?

969
01:22:33,421 --> 01:22:34,505
Andrei?

970
01:22:35,380 --> 01:22:36,670
Andrei!

971
01:22:36,671 --> 01:22:37,671
Andrei!

972
01:22:39,671 --> 01:22:42,296
The thing is we've only been together
for two weeks

973
01:22:43,130 --> 01:22:45,838
and you cannot have me this whipped, okay?

974
01:22:48,296 --> 01:22:51,379
All good? Can I have a shower now?

975
01:22:51,380 --> 01:22:53,671
Only if you have the balls
to enter the bathroom.

976
01:22:57,588 --> 01:22:59,212
Maybe I'll join you in the shower.

977
01:22:59,213 --> 01:23:03,005
Or maybe you'll join me
in kicking your ass!

978
01:23:10,921 --> 01:23:12,255
We have a problem.

979
01:23:14,171 --> 01:23:16,254
- You forgot the onions?
- Even if I don't say anything,

980
01:23:16,255 --> 01:23:18,505
it doesn't mean that I don't know
something is wrong.

981
01:23:19,380 --> 01:23:21,796
You're a Cancer,
you don't know how to lie.

982
01:23:23,171 --> 01:23:25,796
So, what's the problem?

983
01:23:27,171 --> 01:23:32,754
Well... You know I love pancakes, right?

984
01:23:32,755 --> 01:23:34,379
Do you want me to make you
some pancakes?

985
01:23:34,380 --> 01:23:35,630
But I also...

986
01:23:38,213 --> 01:23:39,921
But I also love ice cream.

987
01:23:42,546 --> 01:23:45,046
So what if I had to choose
between the two?

988
01:23:47,046 --> 01:23:51,671
What if I had to choose which desert
I want to eat for the rest of my life?

989
01:23:53,921 --> 01:23:55,505
All I can say is that...

990
01:23:56,921 --> 01:23:59,088
That's not right to play both sides.

991
01:24:00,713 --> 01:24:02,921
You have to decide what you want.

992
01:24:15,671 --> 01:24:17,130
I want pancakes.

993
01:24:18,421 --> 01:24:20,921
No, I want ice cream.

994
01:24:22,630 --> 01:24:24,088
Or pancakes.

995
01:24:25,005 --> 01:24:26,880
Or ice cream. I don't know.

996
01:24:32,171 --> 01:24:35,212
The truth is, no matter
how much you fight it,

997
01:24:35,213 --> 01:24:37,546
in the end you're still gonna
end up crying.

998
01:24:40,046 --> 01:24:42,879
- For love?
- What?

999
01:24:42,880 --> 01:24:46,296
No! From the onions.

1000
01:24:49,630 --> 01:24:52,338
But the most important thing of all
is having the right recipe.

1001
01:24:52,838 --> 01:24:55,546
- For the meatballs?
- No.

1002
01:24:56,755 --> 01:24:57,755
For love.

1003
01:24:58,838 --> 01:25:02,505
Sometimes you just have to look at it
as a test you have to pass.

1004
01:25:03,505 --> 01:25:04,879
Love?

1005
01:25:04,880 --> 01:25:07,713
No, the meatball, pay attention!

1006
01:25:09,088 --> 01:25:12,420
The secret is in knowing
how to reinvent yourself.

1007
01:25:12,421 --> 01:25:16,630
And if that doesn't work,
then you need to spice things up.

1008
01:25:18,963 --> 01:25:20,171
The meatball?

1009
01:25:22,255 --> 01:25:23,796
The relationship.

1010
01:25:24,421 --> 01:25:27,088
Jesus! You're making no sense.

1011
01:25:38,255 --> 01:25:41,380
Baby, it's very easy.

1012
01:25:42,088 --> 01:25:45,170
If you would have liked
the pancake that much,

1013
01:25:45,171 --> 01:25:47,463
you wouldn't have noticed
the ice cream.

1014
01:25:49,213 --> 01:25:53,838
But if you want to taste it, it's obvious
that you like the ice cream more.

1015
01:25:58,880 --> 01:26:02,505
- I love you.
- I love you too, son.

1016
01:26:03,630 --> 01:26:05,755
But if you get the ice cream pregnant,

1017
01:26:06,713 --> 01:26:08,588
I'll shove your dick in the grinder!

1018
01:26:19,671 --> 01:26:21,796
You do realize we have a wardrobe,
right?

1019
01:26:22,880 --> 01:26:26,254
In the spring, nature wakes up.

1020
01:26:26,255 --> 01:26:28,420
The trees become greener,

1021
01:26:28,421 --> 01:26:31,712
the birds enchant our ears
with their lovely songs

1022
01:26:31,713 --> 01:26:34,005
and the squirrel gets busy.

1023
01:26:34,921 --> 01:26:38,296
You can't even imagine
how much I've missed you!

1024
01:26:48,046 --> 01:26:50,380
This little squirrel... Sorry!

1025
01:26:51,046 --> 01:26:56,630
This medium-sized squirrel wants
really badly to enter the hollow.

1026
01:26:57,505 --> 01:26:59,380
Yay! He made it!

1027
01:27:00,588 --> 01:27:03,670
Oh, yeah, the squirrel loves
the hollow!

1028
01:27:03,671 --> 01:27:07,170
It's warm, it's cozy and it's dark.

1029
01:27:07,171 --> 01:27:09,921
It would like to stay in the hollow
its whole life.

1030
01:27:10,463 --> 01:27:12,962
But it can't.

1031
01:27:12,963 --> 01:27:16,505
Usually, the squirrel can last
for about ten minutes.

1032
01:27:17,505 --> 01:27:20,463
Fifteen minutes if it had a beer first.

1033
01:27:21,046 --> 01:27:24,130
After that, of course,
he goes to sleep.

1034
01:27:38,921 --> 01:27:42,630
I've never had
to come so quietly before.

1035
01:27:43,630 --> 01:27:46,755
Be happy you came,
it doesn't happen too often.

1036
01:27:49,005 --> 01:27:50,963
I feel exhausted.

1037
01:27:52,088 --> 01:27:55,005
Sweet dreams, my artichoke!

1038
01:28:03,921 --> 01:28:08,338
Damn! Remember when my problem
was not getting the girl?

1039
01:28:21,255 --> 01:28:22,796
- Hi.
- Hey, hey...

1040
01:28:27,255 --> 01:28:28,463
What are you doing here?

1041
01:28:29,088 --> 01:28:30,796
- Let's go for a walk.
- No!

1042
01:28:32,505 --> 01:28:34,629
I just... I couldn't sleep
because we fought,

1043
01:28:34,630 --> 01:28:36,545
so I decided to come and see you.

1044
01:28:36,546 --> 01:28:38,588
It's 1 am, let's talk in the morning.

1045
01:28:39,171 --> 01:28:42,713
No! I don't want to sleep
knowing that we had a fight.

1046
01:28:44,630 --> 01:28:45,630
And...

1047
01:28:47,963 --> 01:28:51,130
I'm really horny. I want you.

1048
01:28:54,546 --> 01:28:56,212
- Here and now...
- Are you insane?

1049
01:28:56,213 --> 01:28:58,421
- What?
- The neighbors will see us.

1050
01:29:03,171 --> 01:29:04,379
So what?

1051
01:29:04,380 --> 01:29:05,838
Yeah, so what?

1052
01:29:27,630 --> 01:29:28,713
Fuck off!

1053
01:29:34,546 --> 01:29:35,838
I liked you

1054
01:29:37,421 --> 01:29:39,338
for so many years

1055
01:29:40,505 --> 01:29:45,629
and I've really thought you are the one
who will make me happy, but...

1056
01:29:45,630 --> 01:29:48,920
No, no, no, we don't need a "but."
It's okay.

1057
01:29:48,921 --> 01:29:51,380
Sadly, we do.

1058
01:29:53,421 --> 01:29:58,838
Because I realized my happiness
lies somewhere else.

1059
01:30:00,005 --> 01:30:01,421
Don't say that.

1060
01:30:03,421 --> 01:30:04,880
We can work this out.

1061
01:30:06,255 --> 01:30:07,630
I'm sure!

1062
01:30:08,505 --> 01:30:09,921
I'm afraid we can't.

1063
01:30:11,880 --> 01:30:19,338
Ramona, this sick, toxic thing
between us has to end.

1064
01:30:20,296 --> 01:30:22,213
Don't you have any feelings for me?

1065
01:30:24,421 --> 01:30:26,462
- I do.
- Yeah?

1066
01:30:26,463 --> 01:30:27,838
I really do.

1067
01:30:29,046 --> 01:30:30,837
But it's not love.

1068
01:30:30,838 --> 01:30:36,630
It's not that love I always wanted and
dreamt about since I was a little boy.

1069
01:30:37,838 --> 01:30:39,630
You cannot do this to me.

1070
01:30:40,880 --> 01:30:42,046
I'm sorry!

1071
01:30:44,046 --> 01:30:45,171
Wait!

1072
01:30:52,255 --> 01:30:53,546
You bastard...

1073
01:30:56,171 --> 01:30:57,713
How dare you?

1074
01:31:08,463 --> 01:31:09,755
It's getting late.

1075
01:31:11,046 --> 01:31:14,963
- I have to go.
- Why? Hey!

1076
01:31:26,130 --> 01:31:27,880
I chose the ice cream.

1077
01:31:31,130 --> 01:31:32,130
Ow!

1078
01:31:33,546 --> 01:31:34,796
What ice cream?

1079
01:31:35,630 --> 01:31:39,171
Andrei!

1080
01:31:40,963 --> 01:31:42,296
Hey, I'm talking to you!

1081
01:32:17,171 --> 01:32:19,712
So, this is me now.

1082
01:32:19,713 --> 01:32:23,504
I live in Bucharest,
I wrote a bestselling book,

1083
01:32:23,505 --> 01:32:25,463
and everything seems perfect.

1084
01:32:26,130 --> 01:32:28,795
Of course, I missed out
on being Ramona's boyfriend

1085
01:32:28,796 --> 01:32:32,170
and, even though I was
madly in love with her for years,

1086
01:32:32,171 --> 01:32:34,963
it was the best decision I ever made.

1087
01:32:36,255 --> 01:32:40,838
Are you sure you need to go?

1088
01:32:45,505 --> 01:32:46,671
Yeah.

1089
01:32:49,796 --> 01:32:52,920
If I ditch him,
he'll break up with me... again.

1090
01:32:52,921 --> 01:32:54,255
Party pooper!

1091
01:32:54,921 --> 01:32:58,879
But don't worry,
I'll be back in... two or three hours.

1092
01:32:58,880 --> 01:33:00,920
Okay, so be it.

1093
01:33:00,921 --> 01:33:02,880
I'll let you cheat on me with Al.

1094
01:33:10,338 --> 01:33:12,796
- Bye! I love you!
- I love you too!

1095
01:33:34,671 --> 01:33:35,921
What's up, star boy?

1096
01:33:39,088 --> 01:33:41,045
Since you've been writing
successful novels

1097
01:33:41,046 --> 01:33:43,796
you forgot about us,
the regular people.

1098
01:33:54,005 --> 01:33:55,296
I can't believe this!

1099
01:33:57,005 --> 01:33:59,170
How are you?
What are you doing here?

1100
01:33:59,171 --> 01:34:03,295
Well, I was in the area and I saw
your Facebook check-in

1101
01:34:03,296 --> 01:34:04,545
and I said "why not?"

1102
01:34:04,546 --> 01:34:06,630
Bring us two shots, please!

1103
01:34:08,713 --> 01:34:10,130
So, long time no see...

1104
01:34:10,755 --> 01:34:14,671
No phone calls, no texts,
no nothing...

1105
01:34:18,130 --> 01:34:21,004
Yeah, sorry to disturb you, guys.
I am your biggest fan.

1106
01:34:21,005 --> 01:34:23,545
- Can I have your autograph, please?
- Sure.

1107
01:34:23,546 --> 01:34:24,880
My girlfriend loves you.

1108
01:34:27,005 --> 01:34:28,463
- What...
- Alex.

1109
01:34:31,546 --> 01:34:32,796
Thanks, thanks a lot!

1110
01:34:36,755 --> 01:34:38,213
That just proves my point.

1111
01:34:40,255 --> 01:34:41,880
Yeah, I suppose.

1112
01:34:43,088 --> 01:34:47,420
But the last time we saw each other
you were... pretty pissed.

1113
01:34:47,421 --> 01:34:50,046
Who, me? Can't remember why.

1114
01:34:55,213 --> 01:34:56,880
I've been thinking of you, you know.

1115
01:35:01,130 --> 01:35:03,505
It even happened when I was fucking
someone else.

1116
01:35:05,546 --> 01:35:07,505
How fucked up is that, right?

1117
01:35:10,005 --> 01:35:11,046
Let's not...

1118
01:35:12,505 --> 01:35:13,838
Why not?

1119
01:35:22,005 --> 01:35:23,005
Ramona, look...

1120
01:35:25,338 --> 01:35:27,963
I have a girlfriend now
and I'm finally happy.

1121
01:35:29,463 --> 01:35:30,879
So...

1122
01:35:30,880 --> 01:35:34,880
Yes, it was nice,
really nice seeing you...

1123
01:35:37,005 --> 01:35:38,380
but I need to get home.

1124
01:35:38,880 --> 01:35:42,755
Oh, my God,
you're such a party pooper!

1125
01:35:45,713 --> 01:35:48,088
Stay a little longer
and I'll drive you home after.

1126
01:35:49,380 --> 01:35:51,671
No, I'm... I'm okay, I'll get a cab.

1127
01:35:52,630 --> 01:35:53,630
Wait!

1128
01:35:54,713 --> 01:35:56,171
Did you think I was hitting on you?

1129
01:35:59,713 --> 01:36:02,088
Andrei... I'm engaged.

1130
01:36:03,255 --> 01:36:06,379
- Oh, really?
- Yeah. To a very nice man.

1131
01:36:06,380 --> 01:36:08,588
His dad owns a football team,
so relax.

1132
01:36:09,171 --> 01:36:10,671
You have nothing to worry about.

1133
01:36:11,755 --> 01:36:15,546
Come on, I'll drive you home
and I'll go see my fiancé.

1134
01:36:16,463 --> 01:36:17,963
So? Shall we?

1135
01:36:18,880 --> 01:36:21,337
Ramona, you've been drinking.

1136
01:36:21,338 --> 01:36:23,963
I don't think it's such a good idea
for you to drive.

1137
01:36:24,463 --> 01:36:28,630
I only had two shots!
Come on, don't be such a pussy!

1138
01:36:29,880 --> 01:36:31,130
You'll put on your seat belt.

1139
01:36:31,880 --> 01:36:32,963
Come on!

1140
01:36:46,046 --> 01:36:49,505
This guy I'm seeing,
he's really something.

1141
01:36:50,713 --> 01:36:53,255
We've just been to Barcelona
for a few days.

1142
01:36:54,171 --> 01:36:57,338
And I think I'll go skiing to Austria.

1143
01:36:58,421 --> 01:36:59,546
Great!

1144
01:37:00,546 --> 01:37:03,963
It's how we roll,
from one vacation to another.

1145
01:37:07,963 --> 01:37:12,296
And he always buys me presents.
Anything I want.

1146
01:37:16,255 --> 01:37:18,921
You should see his mansion, it's huge!

1147
01:37:36,796 --> 01:37:38,379
What the fuck are you doing?

1148
01:37:38,380 --> 01:37:42,296
I think I'm a little drunk!
But it's okay, I got this!

1149
01:37:43,755 --> 01:37:45,713
- Ramona, pull over!
- No!

1150
01:37:46,588 --> 01:37:47,963
Ramona, pull over!

1151
01:37:55,963 --> 01:37:57,504
I'm gonna take you home.

1152
01:37:57,505 --> 01:37:59,963
We wouldn't want
your girlfriend to panic, huh?

1153
01:38:01,463 --> 01:38:02,671
I'm not worried.

1154
01:38:03,963 --> 01:38:08,421
Just pull over so we can talk quietly.
Okay?

1155
01:38:24,296 --> 01:38:28,255
What is wrong with you?
Why are you behaving like this?

1156
01:38:29,671 --> 01:38:30,713
You know...

1157
01:38:32,671 --> 01:38:36,170
- My fiancé...
- Is very rich, I got that.

1158
01:38:36,171 --> 01:38:38,130
No... not that.

1159
01:38:38,838 --> 01:38:40,796
I mean he is very rich, but...

1160
01:38:41,880 --> 01:38:44,796
Our life together isn't as perfect
as it seems.

1161
01:38:46,755 --> 01:38:51,963
You know, the trips and the presents
could never replace feelings.

1162
01:38:53,421 --> 01:38:54,920
What?

1163
01:38:54,921 --> 01:38:57,588
You just told me how happy you are.

1164
01:38:58,755 --> 01:39:00,046
You know...

1165
01:39:00,963 --> 01:39:04,295
Sometimes I just can't help wondering

1166
01:39:04,296 --> 01:39:06,630
how my life would have been
if we were together.

1167
01:39:07,255 --> 01:39:09,130
You would have made me very happy.

1168
01:39:12,755 --> 01:39:14,171
You don't know that.

1169
01:39:16,171 --> 01:39:17,505
Oh, my God...

1170
01:39:20,088 --> 01:39:21,380
I was so stupid.

1171
01:39:25,338 --> 01:39:26,713
It's all my fault.

1172
01:39:29,838 --> 01:39:32,046
If only I could take back time...

1173
01:39:42,463 --> 01:39:44,505
Ramona, stop! What are you doing?

1174
01:39:46,796 --> 01:39:50,796
Ramona, stop! Don't...

1175
01:40:01,130 --> 01:40:04,213
It was impossible for me to resist.

1176
01:40:04,838 --> 01:40:07,088
The meaning of life, you remember?

1177
01:40:08,171 --> 01:40:11,879
If Anemona showed me heaven
while holding my hand,

1178
01:40:11,880 --> 01:40:16,505
then Ramona just grabbed me by
the dick and dragged me through Hell.

1179
01:40:38,921 --> 01:40:40,005
I did a terrible thing.

1180
01:40:44,796 --> 01:40:49,588
Ramona wanted to drive me home

1181
01:40:50,171 --> 01:40:52,338
and... well...

1182
01:40:55,546 --> 01:40:57,005
That bitch stole your wallet?

1183
01:40:58,255 --> 01:41:00,880
She sucked my cock, you cock sucker!

1184
01:41:01,463 --> 01:41:02,838
Alin!

1185
01:41:05,171 --> 01:41:07,005
I found this under your pillow.

1186
01:41:09,421 --> 01:41:12,005
Yes, I have that
so I can spank you later.

1187
01:41:20,588 --> 01:41:23,670
I can't believe I cheated on Anemona.

1188
01:41:23,671 --> 01:41:24,796
So what?

1189
01:41:26,046 --> 01:41:27,213
Shit happens.

1190
01:41:27,838 --> 01:41:31,380
Just text her you're sleeping at my place
and tomorrow you'll go home

1191
01:41:32,838 --> 01:41:34,338
and we'll never speak of this again.

1192
01:41:35,755 --> 01:41:37,713
Why do you have this in your room?

1193
01:41:38,963 --> 01:41:42,046
I have that so you can spank me later.

1194
01:41:45,630 --> 01:41:48,546
But I have to tell her. It's only fair.

1195
01:41:49,796 --> 01:41:50,796
Yo!

1196
01:41:55,796 --> 01:42:00,171
I was in your shoes a long time ago
and I chose honesty.

1197
01:42:01,671 --> 01:42:03,171
Do you wanna know what happened?

1198
01:42:03,963 --> 01:42:05,421
She killed my hamster.

1199
01:42:06,880 --> 01:42:08,713
She cooked it and fed it to me.

1200
01:42:10,880 --> 01:42:11,920
Jesus!

1201
01:42:11,921 --> 01:42:12,921
Alin!

1202
01:42:25,463 --> 01:42:26,671
Anemona!

1203
01:42:31,838 --> 01:42:33,213
Anemona?

1204
01:43:18,671 --> 01:43:20,754
Well, boo-fucking-hoo!

1205
01:43:20,755 --> 01:43:23,505
What kind of a comedy
doesn't have a happy ending?

1206
01:43:26,880 --> 01:43:31,129
Anemona? Is that you?

1207
01:43:31,130 --> 01:43:34,504
No, it's not Anemona, you dumb-ass!

1208
01:43:34,505 --> 01:43:36,921
Look at you, crying like a little girl.

1209
01:43:37,588 --> 01:43:41,504
"Oh, Anemona, where are you?
Please don't leave me!"

1210
01:43:41,505 --> 01:43:44,754
I don't know who you are,
I don't know what you want...

1211
01:43:44,755 --> 01:43:47,337
But if you don't tell me,
I will look for you,

1212
01:43:47,338 --> 01:43:50,671
I will find you and I will kill you!

1213
01:43:55,963 --> 01:43:59,420
The speech from "Taken"? Seriously?

1214
01:43:59,421 --> 01:44:01,130
How ridiculously stupid!

1215
01:44:02,046 --> 01:44:03,170
Holy shit!

1216
01:44:03,171 --> 01:44:07,588
Hey, watch your mouth
in the presence of... the Almighty!

1217
01:44:08,630 --> 01:44:10,504
You disgusting sinner!

1218
01:44:10,505 --> 01:44:12,213
Let's try this!

1219
01:44:14,005 --> 01:44:15,712
How did you do that?

1220
01:44:15,713 --> 01:44:18,962
If I'm God,
I guess you must be Jesus.

1221
01:44:18,963 --> 01:44:21,921
You know, you can walk on water.
Come on, try it!

1222
01:44:25,088 --> 01:44:28,130
- What a dumb motherfucker!
- Who the hell are you?

1223
01:44:28,880 --> 01:44:32,755
You haven't figured it out by now?
I'm future you, buddy.

1224
01:44:33,796 --> 01:44:35,380
If you are me, then fuck you!

1225
01:44:36,213 --> 01:44:38,755
I mean... fuck me! Whatever!

1226
01:44:40,380 --> 01:44:41,505
Wait!

1227
01:44:42,963 --> 01:44:46,005
- You can take me wherever I want?
- Where do you wanna go?

1228
01:44:52,671 --> 01:44:56,421
So... You gonna hook up with her?

1229
01:44:57,463 --> 01:44:58,463
You know what?

1230
01:45:01,713 --> 01:45:02,713
Fuck you, dude!

1231
01:45:08,588 --> 01:45:11,629
You do know you could've
just gone back to last night

1232
01:45:11,630 --> 01:45:15,005
and not got blown by Ramona, right?