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- The Farmer at the Movies
- An old farmer went to town to see a movie. The ticket agent asked, “Sir, what's that on your shoulder?"
- The old farmer said, "That's my pet rooster, Chuck. Wherever I go, Chuck goes."
- “I'm sorry sir," said the ticket agent. “We can't allow animals in the theater."
- The old farmer went around the corner and stuffed Chuck down his overalls and then returned to the theater, bought a ticket, and sat next to two old widows named Marge and Mildred.
- The movie started and the rooster began to squirm. The old farmer unbuttoned his fly so Chuck could stick his head out and watch the movie.
- "Marge," whispered Mildred.
- "What?" said Marge.
- "I think the guy next to me is a pervert."
- "What makes you think so?" asked Marge?
- "He undid his pants and he has his thing out", whispered Mildred.
- "Well, don't worry about it", said Marge. “At our age we've seen 'em all."
- "I thought so too", said Mildred, "but this one's eatin' my popcorn!"
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