No, because idiots like that start thinking the world is the same as whatever small little bubble, they operate out of so they start using stupid terminology like trading people and sending you things when they can’t control anything remember the person I had intended and would have been with if not for the actions of particular individuals is the reason I’m here and you can bet for sure that seem reasonable get me out of here It’s promised because it’s already happened and you solidified it by thinking I wouldn’t know when all I had to do is wait for the energy to change in the air and once it happened there wouldn’t be any way for you to go back because you would’ve already been to so far gone I’m sorry for what again I forgot remind me so that I can at least be excepted as an authentic apology, or else, you’re mad and sad and sorry, things are starting to come to light, but it doesn’t mean anything for me since I can see in the dark.

Of course it’s all theoretical. I just focus on the extremely dark reality because why wouldn’t you want to prepare for the worst if you don’t wear a vest hoping you get shot, you wear one in case you do and you hope things go right do everything to stop things bad from happening while being hopeful something good can happen, I got a learn how to draw a rabbit in a bunch of different ways or continue do the Lisa thing but I’d prefer to do that on digital. It’s a digital project. It doesn’t work and transfer over very well so that means I can pause and add that to the list of projects cause I can do the emoji project 15 to 20 minutes a day when I get really scheduled and organized I was on my way to becoming organized and then I got messed up in regards to my house in trauma and I’m still dealing with that it’s only been three months so we still got like three months to go April June, Jul

It’s going to be so bad when they see me in a few years it won’t even be revenge because I won’t want to be seen that’s what’s going to make it so much better. I didn’t want to show you this because of the decision you had already made, and lived with, would have been harder to live with after the fact , how are you supposed to be happy with what you have if you see what you could’ve had that’s better that’s the worst when it gradually gets better and better and better and the more time that goes on the more things you can compare I hope money was the only reason because when it’s not a reason It’s like the odds were one till 100 so my 100 reasons were outweighed by the one fact of money but if I get money that 100 reasons becomes stupid I wouldn’t want to see me becoming something either because the contest I enter in for user experience after this experience has concluded, is going to be funny I just need to find a contest, and then I can enter. It doesn’t even matter because, it’s just a passion project and you know how much I like to make passion and Projects I have so many it’s only a matter of time before one of them becomes lucrative and sustains me financially and then I can start selling projects because right now you can just steal them at a discount and feel good about them Hoping you know how to make them successful when you take the idea but use your mentor skills to help someone but even then it doesn’t work as well as it should have with the vision because it’s diluted.

Disgusting stipulations not met requirements not achieved not trying you’re just being a dick because you have nothing better to do with your time other than play logistics because that’s how you pass the time so so bad that’s your job and that’s it. I figured you out and you’re just as big of a waste of time, it’s after the fact I’ve already alleviated myself and useless. I can just stay alone and maintain the time spent alone outside of a relationship continued on for 2016, because everyone I interacted with platonic was never that deep and it won’t ever be able to be that deep again I mean I won’t be able to do that because I just don’t want to have to do that sh*t anymore I’m tired plus I don’t think I know how to do it properly. No one’s gonna show me how to do it properly. I don’t care to learn how to do it properly on my own unless I’m being forced since no one cares enough to force me to do or learn anything in regards to that I don’t have to give a fu*k or care You missed out on teaching me how to love and now you have to deal with this thing that they didn’t get to learn before you could manipulate it into something beneficial for yourself and now it’s only negative and you couldn’t even teach me the lesson I needed to learn

it’s one of those counterproductive ones are counterintuitive and you won’t and refused to and that’s what makes it so much better I can just keep thinking everything is a tease until court and then I won’t have to even think about it since I’ll pay for it to confirm it’s legitimacy documented and have paperwork associated just to make myself feel better become exactly what they thought. I didn’t want to become because they thought it’s some thing I felt it negatively towards having strong feelings doesn’t mean they are negative or positive it’s just feelings because of my mood disorder, you have to assume they’re negative feelings because you have to assume I came from a normal place but I was brave, put through a genocide and raised on the other side of the spectrum so all of that difficult to talk about bullsh*t is too easy for me to speak on and that’s my problem because I was an adult as a child I never understood why certain things couldn’t be said around kids and then I had to become a student teacher guidance worker, and do all of these things with kids to learn the topic of discussion for children, Michelle and always will be anything other than the reality or financial issues that’s why adults only talk about money and that’s why I can only really focus on court

Yeah, I’ll just sign up for like a program or some research experiment that they do for couples and relationships and get a girlfriend that way fu*k whatever you keep trying to include yourself in because I can see that’s why you have to be the one to keep sending me an offering me something so you can keep relative connection as opposed to me building a relationship and Doing something with someone who keeps you out of my circle that’s why the people you send have a connection to you so that you made and can maintain your filament strand of connection with me the same as always they have to hide me in the public, but in the public at attached until I can get my chopper chopper Heller copter that’s fine you’re gonna copy something and end up in the desert and won’t have anything to copy to get yourself out or anywhere else other than where you got yourself you use copied material to put yourself somewhere and then you get stuck because you can’t copy from where you are. How are you gonna pivot go ahead take it I dare you.

I’ll actually take a break go on vacation so I can come back and see you where you got yourself stuck so I know what to avoid

You can reach here but you can’t reach if I go to the museum and that’s where I know I’m going to get picked up that’s why I don’t care about anything in between, and you can’t tease me with the possibility of being with somebody who does not like me I’m not stupid yeah, I don’t doubt the fact they probably love me, but not in the same way that I would want to be loved in the type of way where it’s like we just wanna make sure you’re OK and out of our hair

The problem is, I’m way too far on that end of the spectrum and I wouldn’t get comfortable way too fast and cause other people to get uncomfortable because how comfortable I am it’s like what happened at the Barrett Centre house and like in the umbrella Academy with that dude who has to die, and it takes him a shorter amount of time to come back after he’s died a specific amount of times some people are still on there like first or fifth, and it takes way too long I can get over it but I still have that stupid OCD thing it’s just bad luck. They were my favourite person, and then you have the trauma bond authoritative position in the financial incentive with associatioN

The fact everybody disliked her made me like her even more really weird. I like this person is awesome you’re super mean and straightforward but that’s why you don’t like them that’s weird they’re my favourite person and it made everybody even feel more weird because everybody liked me because I’m overly friendly, and they couldn’t understand why I like this person everybody but I got along with them the best acetaminophen

This guy is gross because he’s trying to do what he thinks I was doing to make somebody like me or to get close to somebody when you do it in the bullsh*t way by annoying them. I did it in the way where they just end up liking you from you being cool just naturally doing things that makes people like you not like I asked literally went about my day and making sure that I made myself laugh. I need to laugh more than whoever thinks they have a better life than me. You didn’t laugh as much as me and you’re supposed to be living better than me and let’s talk about that let’s unpack that and break it down.