Adventure Description: A bit of wildness only seen every one hundred years, the biggest event brought to life by all of Pentawa, the Drastic Triathalon is on! It's time to forget days of bloody battle and run with all you've got! Incidentally, apparently a party of

Thief, Midwife, Beggar and I thiiiiiink Mortician) will have an advantage...

Team (~0:50)

Fujiwara Norika Sorimachi Takashi
(No Magic) (No Magic)
Crystal Staff GTO Punch!
Sexy Pose GTO Kick!!
(Something) GTO GRAB!!!

Morning Star Michael's Sword
DYNAMITE BODY!! Silver Sword

HONEZAI SANBO
(No Magic) (No Magic)
Small Axe Wooden Staff
Leather Armor Cloth Robe
Small Shield Crystal Ring


0:55: "Oh, will you be participating as well? Y N"

1:03: "That makes a total of four teams participating, then.
1:11: "Your team- the Hero Team, Ogre Team,"
1:16: "Busty Gals Team, and the Old Folks Team."
1:22: "I'm looking forward to seeing how many of these people can actually complete the race."
1:30: "After all, this race isn't just a normal race."
1:37: "This race is comprised of a 3.9 kilometers doggy-paddle swimming section, 1800 meters of rock climbing,"
1:43: and a 42.195 kilometer marathon and treasure hunt section."
1:50: "Oh, and there's a dance contest as well."
1:56: "Whoa, whoa, we're not a sports team!"
2:05: "Hehehe. Well, good luck."

2:15: "Hii! It's Ria. We're competing in the race too."
2:25: "Hey there! I'm still Kiara. It's been a while."
2:32: "Goodness, it has been too long. I'm Seena. Thank you very much for your aid in the Bandit Tower."
2:43: "Oh my, it's been forever. Remember? I'm Karen, the Medusa hunter."
2:52: "I moved to Pentawa recently."
2:55: "I'm living in a red brick house."
3:01: "Incidentally, my idiot teacher ran off somewhere again."

3:11: "Really, youths are always in such a hurry. Victory will be ours, after all."
3:22: "Ho ho ho ho!"

3:34: "Ahhh, you guys!
3:39: "We were just hired with that damn old man's money, but"
3:46: "You really did a number on us, damnit."
3:54: "We're gonna pay you back for every pain you gave us in the race."
4:01: "Ho ho ho!"
4:03: "It's been a while, hasn't it? Well, this year's race my servants, the Ogres will"
4:12: "claim the prize money, and as they say, it's all profit for me."
4:18: "Wah ha ha ha ha!"
4:21: "Damnit, this old man's got something nasty up his sleeve."

4:31: "Welcome heroes!"
4:36: "What, who am I?"
4:40: "How rude!"
4:43: "I am the most respected and greatest of the mages, Orther."
4:47: "Well then, with this Anywhere Door*, I shall send you to the race grounds."
* - as a side note, which you don't have to publish in the video, this is a bad Doraemon reference.
4:54: "Bippity boppity boo!"


5:04: "Now then, first let's see how you do with an easy one. Time for you to do 3.9km of long-distance swimming, doggy paddle!"
5:10: "Wa ha ha. No problem, I'm confident in my doggy paddle and my standing-swimming.*"
* - ...technically it means 'treading water,' but given how Sorcerian characters swim I'm pretty sure this is a joke.
5:15: "That's all I CAN do, but..."
5:19: "Move! MOVE!! The OGRES are coming through!"
5:26: "Aiee! W, we messed up!! We can't swimmmmm!"
5:34: "Glub, glub, glub, glub..."
5:38: "It's because you leapt into the water without doing warm-up exercises first."

5:52: "Hello there, good little boys and girls. This here's the middle of the race."
5:58: "Hm? Who am I, you ask?"
6:01: "I'm the Umpire Kraken, Hachirou!"
6:08: "You can call me Hacchan if you'd like."
6:13: " Hacchan?"
6:16: "Ehe, a, aww, you're embarrasing me..."

6:31: "Hellllllo! And well done."
6:33: "Keep it up, and good luck on the next stage!"


6:40: "This is the rock climing section. Aim for the top and keep on going up, up, up!"
6:47: "H, how do you want us to get up this cliff..."
6:51: "Alternate pressing the 8 and 2 keys."
6:54: "But keep in mind it's not just about pressing as fast as you can."
6:58: "Timing's what really matters."
7:02: "Now, off you go!"

8:12: "Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!! Time for a Sorcerian Quiz!"
8:17: "If you can't get these all right, you're not going any further."
8:21: "If you think the answer is right, then press Y. If you think it's wrong, press N."
8:26: "Well then, here we go."
8:31: "The first herb found in the Riddle of the Red Jewel is Lavender."
8:38: "In the Tower of Thieves, the guard of the Elevator is Todd."
8:44: "You can use HEAL with the Silver Sword."
8:50: "In Lucifer's Floodgate, there's a total of 7 types of weapons and armor to be found."
8:57: "Karen is 18 years old."
9:02: "The Galatine* is equippable."
* - Technically the "Garateen" in Sierra's translation, but it's a reference to an actual piece of Arthurian mythology.
9:08: "The name of the god of the Sun is Duon."
9:28: "Ohhh, you've gotten them all correct."
9:29: "You must be quite the nerd, hmmm?"
9:30: "Very well. You may proceed to the next stage."

9:39: "This isn't the time to be taking side-trips."

10:02: A strange woman is crouched over on the ground, in pain.
10:07: "Hmm? I feel like we've met somewhere before."
10:14: "Owwwww... my chronic cramps..."
10:18: "I'm sorry, travellers, would you go to my house and get my medicine for me Y N"
10:26: "Ahh, what kind people you are."
10:31: "My house is the biggest, most stand-out of any in the area."
10:37: "Please go get the medicine from there.

10:54: "You got the Mountain Medicine."
11:00: "Whaaa! The door's suddenly locked!!"
11:06: "Ohohohohohohoho!"
11:08: "You fools, you fell right for it!"
11:13: "You, you're the Evil Shaman!"
11:18: "That's right! And you're the ones who, just as I finished stealing offerings from all those dumb peasants,
11:25: "and was enjoying my ultra super gorgeous delicious* noble life,
* - I swear that's what she says. It's in katakana, you can look it up.
11:33: "stole back the Bracelet of the Gods and ruined it all!"
11:39: "I won't let you win this race, no matter whaaaaaat!!"
11:43: "Ohhohohohohohohohohoho!
11:50: "Heh heh heh. No worries, leave these simple locks to me, and it's one, two, three."
11:55: "Tadaaa!"

12:20: "Now then, the marathon beginning here is also a treasure hunt, and quite the challenge."
12:22: "At each check point, you have to bring the designated item, or you can't pass."
12:26: "Find the items written in the envelope, and bing them to the other side, okay?"
12:30: "First, checkpoint #1. Now then, pick any envelope you'd like."
12:33: "Ummm... Which envelope, hmm. All right, this one!"
12:38: "Let's see..."
12:41: "Money."
12:44: ". . . . . ."
12:46: "Well then, good luck."

12:52: "Um, I'm sorry. Could you lend us some money?"
12:54: "Why would I ever lend money to some total stranger? F-O-O-L!!"
13:02: "Kind persons to the right and left, I am but a shameful beggar. Please, bless me with your kindness."
13:04: "My, how pitiable!! Here, have this and get something to warm yourself."
13:08: "You recieved Money."
13:11: "Thanks ya much."

13:26: "Oh my, did you get it, then?"
13:30: "You handed over Money."
13:32: "OK!! You've cleared Checkpoint #1!"

13:41: "Now then, checkpoint #2 is up. Pick whichever envelope you'd like."
13:49: "Hmmmm, which one should I go for this time. All right, this one!!"
13:57: "Let's see......."
13:59: "Girl's Panties"
14:02: "W, what the hell are you thinking!! How am I supposed to borrow THAT!?"
14:07: "Now, now, grin and bear it. But, just to say, I'm sure as heck not lending you mine."
14:11: "Well, good luck."

14:25: "This isn't the time to be taking side trips."

14:30: "Um, excuse me. Could you give me your, uh, p-panties..."
14:32: "Aieeeee! T, there's a molestor hereeeeeeee!"
14:38: "Ah, wait, no!! That's not riiight!!"
14:42: "Ahhh, they ran..."

14:52: "This isn't the time to be taking side trips."
14:54: "There's a sign out in front of the door."
14:57: "Medusa Hunter Karen"
15:02: "It seems this house is Karen's."
15:05: "However, the door is locked from inside."
15:08: "Odd, is there someone inside?"
15:13: "Heh heh heh. No worries, leave these simple locks to me, and it's one, two, three."
15:18: "Tadaaa!"

15:22: "Further back in the house, there's an odd old man muttering to himself."
15:30: "Ohhh, sweeet!! Dear Karen's panties!!"
15:37: ". . . . . . . ."
15:39: "Wh!! W, wh, what is it!? Who are you all!?"
15:44: "How about you? who are you?"
15:49: "I, I'm Karen's teacher!!"
15:54: "So, that teacher is running through his apprentice's underwear?"
15:58: "Uhh... It seems you've caught me at quite the humiliating moment."
16:01: "I'll give this to you, so please keep it a secret from Karen!"
16:06: "You got Girl's Panties!"

16:19: "Oh my, did you get it, then?"
16:22: "You handed over Girl's Panties."
16:24: "OK!! You've cleared Checkpoint #2!"

16:32: "All right, this is the end of the treasure hunt marathon. Pick any envelope you'd like."
16:39: "Man oh man, finally over... Well then, which envelope to choose. All right, this one!"
16:45: "Let's see........"
16:47: "Vadis Jerky"
16:50: "Duwha!? T, there's no way I could possibly come up with this!"
15:56: "Now, now, grin and bear it."

17:05: "Oh hey, what are you all here for?"
17:10: "Ahhh, I'm done. I am spent. Sooo tired..."
17:13: "Incidentally, any idea where we could get some Vadis Jerky?"
17:17: "Vadis? Oh, for the treasure hunt."
17:22: "Man, that's still not as crazy as us."
17:25: "We ended up pulling 'the stylishness of the King Dragon' as ours.'
17:30: "Talk about crazy... We've already decided to call it quits."
17:34: "But hey, we're cheering for you. Do what we couldn't, all right?"

17:45: "Hey, welcome! We sell dry good! What can I getcha?"
17:52: "Um, do you have something called Vadis Jerky?"
17:56: "Vadis Jerky? You messin with me!? I'm a Tokyo boy!*"
* - ...he's being very... regional. this joke is mostly inexplicable.
18:03: "I ain't got anything that strange in MY store!!"

18:09: "Heh heh heh heh heh..."
18:13: "Old man! Gimme all the jerky ya got."
18:16: "Oh! Now that's a man of good character! Comin' right up!"
18:20: "Damn straight! I ain't been a dwarf all these years for nothin'!"
18:26: "Now hold onto your butts and watch THIS."
18:30: "Tink tonk kank Tink tonk kank"
18:33: "How about THAT!! Now, anyone looking at it'll think it's Vadis Jerky!"
18:37: "Ain't nothing for a mortician like me!"
18:41: "I, incredible! I have underestimated you."
18:44: "Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!"
18:46: "You got Vadis Jerky."

18:58: "Oh my, did you get it, then?"
19:01: "You handed over Vadis Jerky."
19:03: "H, how about that!!"
19:06: "Oh my, I'm amazed you got something like this."
19:10: "Ha ha ha! Well, we're just such good people the universe is getting us back."
19:14: "Sniff sniff sniff."
19:16: "Is this really the real thing?"
19:21: "Ghkt! W, what are you saying, little bunny. Of course this is Vadis Jerky."
19:25: "Well, whatever. You've cleared Checkpoint #3."

19:41: "Welcome! This is the last checkpoint!"
19:48: "That building there is the hall. Now, hurry on inside."

19:59: "Welcome to the Samba Contest hall!
20:05: "Samba contest?"
20:07: "That's right. We're going to have you dance a samba on the stage in front of you."
20:12: "If you can't dance it well, you fail the race."
20:14: "Whaaaaaieee!!"

20:18: "Waaah! N, no, I can't dance the samba!!"

20:25: "Waaah! N, no, I can't dance the samba!!"

20:29: "Eee hee hee. If it's a samba you're looking for, leave it to this midwife!"
* - Midwife is "samba" in Japanese. No, seriously.


21:03: "T, thank you very much. Now then, let's hear from the judges!!"
21:10: "Judge Kiya N, no. I was a fool for hoping for anything..."
21:17: "Judge Tommy I can't stand it. I don't even care anymore."
21:25: "Judge Lil' Igor Um, I'm not really sure what to think of that, but let's call it a pass."
21:33: "Well then, you pass. Congratulations!"

21:48: "You've done well to come all this way."
21:54: "The only ones who have come this far are you and the Old Folks Team."
21:58: "Now, the goal is but moments away!!"

22:22: "FUNKY!!"
22:27: "Ha ha ha ha ha ha!!"
22:30: "!!"
22:31: "Heyyyy, it's been a while, huh? It's me- me!!"
22:38: "I got summoned by that damn old mage again, this time I'm here to mess with you."
22:47: "Seriously, talk about a messed up guy, huh?"

22:53: "Nooope nope nopeeeee! You guys ain't getting a step past here! Yay!"

23:10: "Welcome. We're a hardware store. Anything you're looking for?"
23:16: "Here, how about this shovel? I'll make it cheap."
23:20: "No, we're fine."
23:22: "I see..."
23:25: "All right then, here, how about a pickaxe?"
23:28: "No, we're fine."
23:31: "So, a hammer..."
23:34: "No! Really! We don't need any of that!"
23:37: "Look, customer. Buy SOMETHING. Please."
23:42: "No, look, here, today you get it for free."
23:45: "I'm just gonna go and GIVE this bucket to you!!"
23:50: "Aren't you the lucky one, eh? Eh!?"
23:52: "You got a Bucket."

24:05: "You filled the Bucket with River Water."

24:17: "Hey!! You nasty old sunglasses man! If you don't move, you're getting the bucket!"
24:24: "You blew the bucket's load of River Water."
24:28: "OH!! NO!!"
24:31: "You won the battle. You gained 1 exp."

24:37: "Oh? The Old Folks Team is exhausted right before the goal."
24:44: "Yes. Yes."
24:46: "My chronic rheumatism and neuralgia... I'm sorry, but could you go get us medicine?"
24:54: "Give them Mountain Medicine? Y N"
25:03: "Ohhh! The pains in my body are fading."
25:07: "All right then, everyone! This is the last run!"
25:13: "The Old Folks Team won."

25:24: "Aw, that's too bad."
25:28: "Waaah..."
25:30: "Now, don't be so disappointed... There's good things to being alive too."
25:35: "Now, here. Here's your ball pen for participating."
25:39: "You got the Ball Pen."

25:43: "Wa ha ha! You were a bit too naive there at the end."
25:47: "Now, don't let this get you too disappointed, try again sometime!"
25:52: "Here, this is thanks for saving us back there. No, go ahead."
25:59: "You got the Old Folks Robe."

26:16: "Give them Mountain Medicine? Y N"
26:24: "Nnnhhh!! If you don't respect the elderly, you can expect punishment, and very soon!!"

26:32: "Sorcerian Team's victory!!"

26:47: "Congratulations on your victory!!"
26:55: "Now then, the king awaits you over this way."

27:08: "Well, bravo, bravo indeed."
27:12: "This year's was once again quite the fun show for me."
27:17: "Well then, your reward of 10000 gold and 10000 exp."
27:21: "You recieved 10000 gold."
27:23: "You recieved 10000 exp."
27:31: "Hmmm. Still, watching you reminds me of my own youth."
27:37: "I can feel my old muscles itching, and I'd really love to paint the town red suddenly."
27:47: "Your highness."
27:49: "Perhaps even the king might be allowed to go out and paint the town red sometimes."
27:57: "Oh? You think the same, do you?"
28:01: "Yes!!"
28:03: "Well then, let's go wild!!"
28:12: "Y, your highness. W, we get the point!! P, please, stop."
28:20: "Wahahahahahaha!!"
28:22: "Most fun, yes, indeed!"
28:25: "Now here's one that'd surprise King Ghidora."
28:33: "Wahahahahahaha!!"
28:35: "That's all for today!"
28:40: "Dwhahahahahaha!!"

28:45: "Wahahahahaha!!
28:47: "Most fun! Yes, indeed!"