Seth and the troll

  Seth heard a couple of nearby footfalls, and the porcine press began to lessen. A moment later, Seth had been uncovered. This was his chance. He had to act friendly. Show no uncertainty. He rose to his knees.

  The troll towered over him, yellow eyes glaring down. His flesh was thick and folded like the hide of a rhinoceros. The cruel spikes protruding from his shoulders, forearms, thighs, and shins ranged from the length of a knife to the length of a sword. The brute smelled like a monkey house.

  "Hi," Seth said brightly, waving and smiling. "I'm Navarog. How are you?"

  The troll snorted and grunted at the same time. The exhalation intensified the funky odor.

  Seth stood up shakily. "I'm a shadow charmer. An ally of the night. Trolls are my favorite. You sure are big. Look at those spikes! You must be the strongest troll ever!"

  The troll smiled. Four of his bottom teeth jutted up almost to his nose.

  "I figured we'd become friends," Seth continued, stepping away from the dead swine. "How do you like it here?"

  The troll shrugged. "Why you in food?" The words came out like a controlled belch.

  "I'm working on a trick. I'm going to play a joke on the centaurs."

  The troll sat down, picked up a hog, and stuffed the entire animal in his mouth. Bones crunched sickeningly as he chewed. "Me like jokes."

  "I have a really funny one planned. I missed your name."

  The troll swallowed noisily and wiped his lips. "Udnar. " He picked up another hog by the rear legs, dangled it above his upturned mouth, then dropped it in. "Pigs good."

  "I like pigs too. "

  Udnar grabbed a third pig and held it out to Seth. "Take."

  "I can't," Seth apologized. "I ate one on the way in, so now I'm full. I'm not big like you."

  "You take no ask?" the troll accused, voice rising.

  "No, um, not one of yours. I brought one from home. A little one. My size."

  Udnar appeared satisfied. He leaned over to a different pile, snagged a pumpkin the size of a beach ball, and popped it into his mouth. "What joke?"

  Seth fished out the banana from his emergency kit. "Know what this is?"

  "Banana."

  Seth took a steadying breath. He prayed that Nero was right about mountain trolls and pranks. "I'm going to give the centaurs a hilarious surprise. I'm going to switch this banana for the Soul of Grunhold."

  The mountain troll stared at him, eyes widening. He placed one huge hand over his mouth. Then the other. The enormous creature started to shake. He closed his eyes, and tears trickled down his cheeks. Dropping his hands, the troll released a blast of sound like a stuttering foghorn.

  Seth joined in the laughter. The sight of the troll cracking up was really funny, and the rest was fueled by relief.

  Eventually the laughter subsided, leaving the troll panting. "Where put Soul?" Udnar asked.

  "I'm going to hide it, just for a little while. A few days. It will be a good prank."

  "You bring back," the troll checked, his merriment gone.

  "I'll bring it back in a few days," Seth promised. "I just need to sneak it away long enough for the prank to work."

  "Centaurs mad," Udnar said seriously.

  "Probably. But can you picture their faces when they look for the horn and find a banana?"

  Udnar erupted in laughter again, clapping his hands. As his laughter abated, the troll gobbled down another pig. "You funny guy. Talk good Duggish. Udnar miss Duggish."

  "I love Duggish. Best language in the world. So where do you keep the Soul?" Seth was keenly aware that time was slipping away.

  The troll jerked a thumb at the stone in the middle of the room. "Soul in heart."

  "The rock is the heart?"

  "Heart of Grunhold. "

Chapter 14