Level V ballistic armor

Ever seen Predator? Remember the scene where Jesse the Body mows down an entire forrest? Well, I was the forrest. The General Dynamics GAU-19/B six-barrel gatling gun fires .50 calibre NATO rounds at a rate of 1500 per minute. That’s twenty-five bullets, each the length of your hand, every second.

I remember the first couple.

The swarm of death hit me high in the chest, spinning me around and lifting me off my feet. Then I was flying through the air, propelled by gun fire, floating on bullets like a kite in a hurricane. I hit the ground hard and there came a moment of respite and then the storm hit again, tumbling me violently across the stone floor like a twig in a leaf blower. I remember ramming something hard, most likely the far wall, and tumbling and turning and slamming against it for a while. Then the onslaught ceased.

Somehow I was still conscious.

I couldn’t see. I couldn’t tell which way was up. Something wet was in my eyes. Blood. Cascading from beneath my balaclava. Filling my eyes, coursing down the bridge of my nose, onto my cheeks. I could feel it freezing in its tracks on my neck. Booming footsteps approached through darkness. Then The Dzhaggernaut’s enormous boots shook the ground next to my head. His headlamp blazed down on me. The world went red through my blood-drowned eyes.

“You’re still not dead?” he boomed. It took me a time to find my mouth.

“Fuck,” I said. “You.” He chuckled.

“Always the conversationalist.” I heard the sound of the Desert Eagle .50 cocking. “Would you look at that,” he said, shaking his metal head.

“I finally got you.” Then he shot me in the forehead.

...

“Son of a bitch,” I breathed. “It worked.”

“What worked motherfucker?” snapped Ariana. “What this shit made outta?”

“Diamene,” I said. Ariana recoiled. I was reminded of a viper readying to strike.

“The fuck you talkin’ ‘bout?” she hissed, barring her fangs. The crowd laughed uneasily.

“A two-dimensional covalent network of double-bonded carbon atoms that transitions to a three-dimensional diamond structure on impact,” I said. “On a molecular level, the strongest substance on earth. It’s just never been made in a large quantity before, and no one thought to overlap the layers asymmetrically atop an energy-absorbing non-Newtonian polymer gel, then attach it to ultra-high molecular weight polythylene fabric.” Ariana’s face darkened. “Except me,” I added.

...

“In English motherfucker,” she snarled,

..

“The world’s first Level V ballistic armor,” I gasped. “A thousand times stronger than steel, at a hundredth the weight. I had a full body suit fitted beneath my clothes.” Ariana slitted her serpentine eyes.

“You telling me this shit blocked all them bullets?” she said, staring at the stiff, lightweight balaclava in her hands.
“Looks that way,” I said.
-Sledge vs. The Labyrinth, pg. 299-304