Thousand Son in Equestria, part 4 (PARTY HARD)

>Another glorious morning in colorful, daemon-free Equestria! Nothing could put a damper on this da-
>Right, Pinkie's party
>You're honestly not sure what to expect
>The letter gives you a time and tells you it's going to be held in the barn, and that all the ponies will be there
>Honestly, your knowledge of parties is dreadfully limited
>But the party's a concern for later, now it's time to help Applejack with the apple buckin'.
>You wander over to her apple trees, where she sits waiting
>"Mornin', Anonymous! Say, ya seen Applebloom around anywhar? She's been actin' a might strange lately."
>Right. That's the other thing you've got to do. Catch the Cutie Mark Crusaders and straighten them out.
>That can wait. How much trouble can three Chaos-worshipping baby horses get into anyway?
"I have no idea where she could be, Applejack. I'll search for her after we finish with the apples."
>She waves her hoof at you, dismissively.
>"Naw, don't sweat it Anonymous. With how much you an' her sold yesterday, I figure you can get a day off fer your party this afternoon. Go have some fun in town. Big Mac can cover for ya."
>Fun. Right.


"Sure thing, Applejack. Maybe I'll search for the Crusaders while I'm gone."
>Her hat's already down over her eyes, and you think she's about to take a nap.
>"Mmm-hmm. You do that."
>That's strange. Applejack doesn't seem the type to fall asleep on the job.
>Welp, it's none of your business.
>You shrug and warp-teleport yourself to Ponyville.
>A few of the citizens scream and run when you pop up, but you're used to it by now.
>Time to find the Crusaders
>Do horses go to school? Time to find out.
>You look around, spotting a pair of ponies. It's the mint-green unicorn from earlier, and the cream one with the purple-pink hair.
>They're looking over some cherries in a stall.
>You walk over to stand behind them.
"Pardon me, pony-xenos. Do your kind send their spawn to be schooled, and if yes, can you point me in the direction of the nearest teaching facility?"
>Green one turns around and gasps, cream one turns around and sighs.
>"Omigoshomigoshomigoshomigosh!"
>You think the green one might be going into shock.
>"Calm down, Lyra. Yes, mister giant alien thi-"
"Anonymous."
>"Omigoshomigoshomigoshomigosh!"
>"Anonymous. Yeah, the school's thataway. Cheerilee asked you to come for show and tell or something?"
>"Omigoshomigoshomigoshomigosh!"
>You don't know what show and tell is.
"Yes, of course she did. Thank you, xenos. Your aid is appreciated!"
>You can't really shake their hooves, so you reach out and give them a friendly pat on the head.
>The green one faints.
"Is she going to live?"
>The cream one is glaring at you from the head pat.
>"Just go."
>You think that is a wise idea.


>You turn and walk in the direction the cream pony indicated.
>Better just walk rather than teleport everywhere, that seems to freak some of the ponies right the fuck out
>Some of the ponies who recognize you from the apple sale yesterday see you and wave.
>Some brown pony-xenos with an hourglass mark on his hindquarters drops his jaw as you walk past.
>Catch sight of a modest building with a large playing yard out back
>Smaller child-pony xenos running around and laughing in the yard
>You spot a hassled looking purple pony eating a sandwhich at a table in the yard.
>Lunchtime, then, it must be lunchtim-
>"WE CAPTURED IT, FOR CHAAAAOOOOS!"
>Purple pony flinches, puts down sandwhich
>You feel a rustling in your non-corporeal jimmies.


>Oh Tzeentch
>The purple pony gets up and starts shouting
>"Girls, what did I TELL you about defacing school property!"
>You start moving, hopping the fence (literally hopping, that fence is tiny) and moving into the playground
>Instantly the child ponies are staring at you
>Purple pony glances at you and gapes
>You don't give a fuck
>You have to see what horror you have wrought
>In the courtyard, you see Scootaloo, Sweetie Belle, and Applebloom sitting on a Chaos Shrine
>An honest-to-Dark Gods Chaos Shrine, made on top of what you think was a slide
>The chaos star is all over it, along with what you think is a child's interpretation of the marks of Tzeentch, Khorne, and Slaanesh
>The CMC gasp when they see you, slipping down their Chaos Slide to get to you
>"Anonymous, do ya like it? We been tryin' to honor tha Gods all day! When do ya think we'll get our Chaos Heretic cutie marks?"
>Bombarded with questions
>You really want to reprimand them for this, but you honestly can't help but think it's the most adorable thing you've ever seen.
>But you still made a promise to Celestia.
"It's....wondrous, really girls, it is, but-"
>"So YOU must be this 'Anonymous' they've been talking about, eh?"
>Purple teacher pony has walked over
>There is a smile on her face, but in her eyes there is only maximum jimmy-rustled rage
>She puts a hoof on your leg
>"I think we need to talk."
>You glance at the CMC
>They're gone
>The purple pony starts pushing you towards the schoolhouse
>You sigh and follow her.


>Teacher pony gets you both inside the schoolhouse, then turn and closes the door
>"There. Anonymous, have a seat."
"Mamzel, if you will allow me to explain-"
>"Have a seat."
>She's not even being aggressive, like Applejack was
>Face is perfectly calm, but those eyes
>There is a promise of damnation in those huge magenta eyes
>You sit down. You are sure you can reason with this pony.
>She smiles and sits at her desk
>Now. Just what in Celestia's name have you been telling my students!?"
"Mamzel, I-"
>"Applebloom's been ranting and raving ALL DAY, picking fights with Diamond Tiara, and bullying the other students."
"Really, she's not usu-"
>"Sweetie Belle's been playing pranks on the entire class, and she keeps getting the other two into some sort of crazy plan every hour!"
"Really, I can explain everyth-"
>"And Scootaloo! That filly's gone crazy! She keeps SHOUTING all the time, and she's jumping and jittering in her desk! Why, I think she's been sniffing salt! Have you been giving my students salt?"
>What.
"Salt, Mamzel?"
>"Cheerilee is fine. And yes, salt."
"I havn't been giving anyone salt, but what's the problem with it? It's just salt."
>She stares at you like you just sprouted another head.
>She then holds a hoof to her head as if stifling a headache.
>"Right, alien. Okay. Salt is...addictive to ponies. And it's....uh...well...a narcotic."
>Oh shit.
>Scootaloo's been sniffing pony cocaine.
>You think you know where this is going.


"Cheerilee, I think I know what caused this. I was talking to all three of them about some....customs of my people, and they yelled something about Cutie Mark Crusaders and ran off."
>She visibly relaxes.
>"Oooooh. That makes sense. I'm terribly sorry about the misunderstanding then, Mr. Anonymous. They're probably trying to copy a few of your people's, uh, customs in order to get a cutie mark."
>You think it's a lot worse than that.
>Suddenly a shout from the playground
>"HEY DIAMOND TIARA! DO YA HEAR THA VOICES TO!?"
>Yeah it's a lot worse than that.
>Another shout, Scootaloo's voice this time
>" I DO SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALT!"
>You fucked up royal
>Suddenly, bell ringing in the school house.
>Cheerilee sighs.
>"Well that'd be the bell, Anonymous. I don't want to worry you too much, but it might be good if you talk with them."
"I agree with you, Mamzel Cheerilee. I'll have a chat with them."
>She smiles and lets you out of the schoolhouse
>You walk out, trying to not look like you're hurrying. You see pony kids running out everywhere, no sign of the CMC.
>A chilling thought strikes you.
>You never told them anything about the signs of Khorne, Tzeentch, and Slaanesh. Nevermind how to draw them.


>Fuck
>Fuck fuck fuck
>This is the kind of world you serve Chaos to CREATE.
>You don't want to introduce Chaos into it
>At least, not the kind of Chaos the CMC are starting to practice
>How the hell are they even getting anything?
>The only source of Chaos on this world is....
>Oh Tzeentch
>You need to talk to Twilight. Maybe she'll know what to do. Some spell to track them down.


>You march to Twilight's tree-library, double time
>You knock, then barge in, shouting as loud as your voice can go.
"TWILIGHT. I HAVE A PROBLEM AND I REQUIRE THE ASSISTANCE OF A FELLOW PSY-"
>"SSSSHHHHHHHH!"
>Two voices yell at you for silence, stopping you in mid demand.
>Rainbow Dash and Spike are both hushing you desperately.
>Spike runs over, pushing your ceramite shin.
>"Now is not a good time, big guy. At all. You might want to come back la-"
>"WHO WAS THAT!?"
>Spike pales. Rainbow facehoofs.
>"Too late."
>Twilight comes trotting down the stairs, a frankly manic look on her face, and her hair in disarray.
>"On, Anonymous! Come to pick up a BOOK to read maybe? Something on ponies, perhaps? Say, do you feel like helping me with some research!?"
"Uh....no. I just need you to fi-"
>"Oh, no? Fine then."
>She turns and trots back upstairs, humming to herself and ignoring you.
>You turn to look at Rainbow Dash.
"What the Warp is that about?"
>Rainbow gives you an unreadable look.
>"It happens every once in a while. Twilight's gone and read every book in the library, and she doesn't have anything new to study. She's going a little bit crazy waiting on the next shipment of books to arrive from Canterlot, so she'll have something new to study."


>Hmmm.
>Commendable. Her commitment to knowledge would have made Magnus proud.
>But you do not have time for this right now.
>You have pony souls to save
"Is there anything we can do to get her to snap out of it?"
>Spike looks up at you, glaring.
>"You showing up was the first time she's left her room since she ran out. If she doesn't have something new to learn, she starts freaking out and starts re-reading everything."
>Damnit, so Twilight's not an option
>Rainbow Dash spotted the way you're holding your head.
>"Don't worry, Anonymous, she'll be at your party! I'll drag her there myself if I have to. Speaking of which, isn't your party starting soon? I hear Applejack's bringing cider!"
>The party
>Oh no.
>You glance at the clock as you remember the party's start time.
>You hear the sound of hooves.


>BAM! PINKIE PIE OUTTA FUCKING NO-WARP!
>"ANONYMOUS! IT'S TIME FOR YOUR PARTY!"
"NO PINKIE NO! I GOTTA-"
>Too late, you're going to the party
>How the hell is she even moving you?
>You aren't sure you even want to know
>Rainbow laughs as you are slowly dragged to your party by Pinkie Pie
>"Don't worry Anonymous, me and Twilight'll be there. I just gotta drag her out of her room first."
>She shuts the door
>In less time than it should take barring teleportation, Pinkie's dragged you to Applejack's barn.
>"You ready to PAR-TAY, Anonymous?"
"Uh, suuuuuure Pinkie."
>She opens the door
>Ponies, ponies everywhere wearing hats and shouting
>"WELCOME TO PONYVILLE, ANONYMOUS!"
>Cider mugs and a dance floor
>Pinkie even hired a DJ, a white pony with blue hair
>Absolutely none of this is familiar to you
>The only parties familiar to you are the quiet affairs the remembrancers used to put together, and the insane raves of Slaanesh.
>This is somewhere in between
>Ponies start dancing and having fun, and you feel completely out of place.
>You glance at Pinkie. She's all over the party, dancing, drinking, laughing.
>An idea strikes you.



>Pinkie's having a great time, and she put a lot of work into this party.
>You feel, you'd feel....bad if you let them down.
>Even now, some of the ponies are
looking at you and frowning. They're worried you're not having fun.
>Pinkie keeps glancing at you out of the corner of her eye, and a frown flashes on her face. Fluttershy's eyeing you with worry all over her face. Applejack, when she's not downing cider, keeps staring at you. Rarity's not even playing attention, which you're fine with.
>You're not gonna fuck this up for them. You hope to see them smile, to see them happy, like Applebloom was that one day.
>You reach out with your powers and latch on to Pinkie's psyche.
>You know how to steal thoughts and memories. This shouldn't be much different.
>You're going to borrow some of Pinkie's....Pinkie-ness.
>She doesn't seem to notice. You feel thoughts and feelings flowin into y-
>YOU CAN FEEL THE PINKIE OVERTAKING YOU.
>OH GODS WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?


>You have never felt like this before
>It's like you have a sixth sense, for pony's happiness.
>There are ponies at the party who aren't enjoying themselves to the fullest.
>BY TZEENTCH, THAT CANNOT BE ALLOWED
>You know who is unhappy, and you know how to fix it.
>You spot Rainbow Dash dragging a bored-looking Twilight into the party
>You sprint over to them, grab Rainbow Dash, and slide over to the makeshift bar where Applejack is serving cider.
>"Anon-WHOOAAAAA, WHAT THE HAY ANONYMOUS?"
"Rainbow Dash. Drinking contest. You, me. Now. WHAT XENOS HAS THE GUTS TO OUT-DRINK CHAOS' CHOSEN!?"
>You grab a cider-mug, Dash does the same, as do a few ponies at the bar.
>You bring the mug up and pretend to drink, disintigrating the the cider as you do.
>The ponies start drinking
>You match them, drink for drink, until a few of them pass out and Dash starts to get wobbly.
>You suddenly stagger
"BY THE GODS, RAINBOW DASH. I cannot keep up with you! Truly, your liver must be made of solid ceramite!"
>She belches
>"Buck yeah it's made out of cera-,cerma-, WHATEVER YOU JUST SAID!"
>She holds out a hoof. You reflexively bump it
>Dash happiness: achieved
>Next target: Applejack.


>You suddenly turn and look at Applejack, who's been staring with her mouth open the whole time
"APPLEJACK."
>"Oh buck."
>She already knows you can read minds
>She starts drunkenly trying to trot away
>You lunge across the bar and pick her up like a pony-shaped football
>You get in position to throw
"APPLEJACK"
>"Anonymous, Anonymous don't do this. You don-"
"JUST."
>"''t do this. It aint' gonna wor-"
"GO."
>"I'm too sc-"
"TALK TO HER!"
>You hurl Applejack at Rarity, sending her tumbling into the unicorn's table. Rarity gasps a bit, but then her face lights up when she sees it's Applejack. Applejack gives a nervous smile, and then they start talking.
>Applejack and Rarity happiness: achieved
>Next target: Fluttershy
"FLUTTERSHY."
>The yellow pegasus eeps when you bellow her name.
>This one is simple.
>You should have done it already
>You charge at her, leaping several alchohol covered tables and drunken, passed out ponies, until you grab Fluttershy and...
>Give her a very gentle hug.
"I am sorry for hurting Angel and scaring you the day we met. ENJOY THE PARTY!"
>Now, it's Pinkie time.


>You drop Fluttershy, she eeps, but smiles at you.
>You turn and look at Pinkie Pie.
>She's on the dance floor, gaping at you
>She knows something's up
>You know what you must do
>You must party harder than any Astartes has ever partied before
>You turn and shout
"DJ! THE MUSIC IS FAR TOO QUIET! DROP THE BASS!"
>The DJ pony grins
>"Now this alien's speakin' my language!"
>The ponystep begins http://www.youtube.com/watch?
v=sIc_5kQ0fqs
>You start to cut across the dance floor, moves knocking ponies out of the way
"LOUDER! LOUDER!"
>Your dancing draws a crowd of dancing ponies
>You get right next to Pinkie and your dancing hits Mach-2.
>Ponies are gaping at you
>She gasps and starts dancing in return
>You are having a dance-off with a pink horse while hyped up on Pinkiecaine.
>Slaanesh approves.


>The music changes as you dancehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OUqjpGwhaTQ
>LET THE SHUFFLE BEGIN
>With each beat your boot slams into the dance floor
>Pinkie's hooves are keeping up with you
>CHAOS SHUFFLES AT IT'S OWN PACE
>Helmet releases it's seals from your armor
>You shuffle backwards. Your helmet remains floating in place
>There is nothing under the helmet but flickering warp-light
>Your body shuffles backwards while your helmet remains in place, nodding to the beat
>Ponies gasp
>"Sweet Celestia I'm wasted."
>Pinkie's jaw drops, then she starts giggling
>You shuffle back to your helmet, put it on, and strike a pose.
>AND THE CROWD
>GOES
>WILD
>PINKIE HAPPINESS: ACHIEVED.


>There is only one happiness target left, and it's currently sitting in the corner and drinking punch
>You lift your arm and point at it, ignoring the mint-green unicorn that's busy grinding away on your leg
"TWILIGHT SPARKLE!"
>She looks up at you, confused
>You know what'll make her happy. She wants something new to study, something to understand and learn about
>You slowly make your way off the dance floor, idly shuffling and brushing the unicorn off
>As you make your way off, you lean down and rip up a huge section of the floorboards
>In the back of your mind, you're screaming this is a bad fucking idea because AJ is going to be furious, but you're too hyped on Pinkie-essence to care.
>Besides, she's too busy talking to Rarity to notice.
>You toss the huge section of floorboard to the ground, and reinforce it with warp power so that it will hold the right amount of weight
>You then walk over to Twilight, who's still eyeing you warily
>"I'm not going to dance, Anonymous. I don't even want to be at this stupid party."
>You shake your head
"I'm not asking you to dance, Mamzel Sparkle."
>You concetrate, chanting as you tear open portal to the warp next to Twilight's table.
>You toss down the floorboard and hop on. It holds your weight.
>You hold out an arm to Twilight
"I AM ASKING YOU TO RIDE."


>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lEqXzPBvhQ8
>Twilight hops on the jury-rigged warp platform
>You will it forward, into the dazzling blue wonder of Equestria's Warp.
>The pair of you surf crests of joy, manifested as waves in the Warp
>She gasps in shock as you give her a tour of the Great Ocean of emotion that permeates reality
>THE PINKIENESS OVERTAKES YOU
>You begin to sing.
"I CAN SHOW YOU THE WARP. SHINING, SHIMMERING, SPLEEEENDID."
>She looks up at you in shock.
"TELL ME TWILIGHT, WHEN DID YOU LAST LET YOUR HORN DECIDE?"
>The pair of you surf past a pair of giggles, manifested as winged bubbles in the warp.
"I CAN OPEN YOUR EYES. TAKE YOU WONDER BY WOOOOOONDER! OVER, SIDEWAYS, AND UNDER, ON A MAGIC FLOORBOARD RIDE! A WHOLE NEW WORLD, A NEW FANTASTIC POINT OF VIEW!
>She drunkenly picks up the song.
>"A WHOLE NEW WOOOORLD! A DAZZLING PLACE I NEVER KNEW! BUT WHEN I'M WAY OUT HERE, IT'S CRYSTAL CLEAR, I'M IN A WHOLE NEW WORLD WITH YOU! UNBELIEVABLE SIGHTS! INDESC-"
>Suddenly Warp Storm
>Awwww fuck.


>Twilight screams as the wave of warp power barrels toward the both of you
>You hastily turn your board back towards the party's location in real space. A warp storm shouldn't even be possible, Celestia and Luna are the only warp entities her-
>Whatever, worry later, PARTY NOW
>PINKIE COMMANDS IT
>You and Twilight jet out of the Warp as the portal closes behind you, sending the both of you rolling
>Instant Twilight's on you, jumping for joy
>"OH MY CELESTIA! Anon, that was amazing! I didn't even know a place like that existed! I-I've got to study it! I've got so many notes to take! You have to teach me about that pla-"
"Twilight."
>"Hmmm?"
"You're standing on my helmet."
>"Oh. Oops."
>She gets off you, still giddy
>TWILIGHT HAPPINESS: ACHIEVED
>The Pinkie-essence is wearing off, but you still feel great.
>You feel happy. Happy that Pinkie's friends, no, YOUR friends, are happy.
>It is a fulfilling feeling, like slaying minions of the False Emperor used to feel. Or, like carousing with your brothers used to feel.
>You get to your feet, and reach out your mind, searching for Pinkie's. Just for kicks, you grab onto some of the inebriated ponies as well. You never had the chance to be drunk before, what's the worst that could happen?
>The party ain't over yet.


MEANWHILE IN CANTERLOT

>Applebloom feels great. Absolutely amazing.
>All her anger, all the times she's just wanted to buck Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon right in face, she can act on it now!
>And it's all thanks to Khorne!
>She's been showing those bullies up ever since the Voice started speaking to her, and now she's going to be rewarded for her GLORIOUS service!
>Sweetie Belle came up with the plan. They were going to sneak into Canterlot, and let the voice out, just like they did the first time!
>It even taught Sweetie Belle a fancy new spell to get them all there quickly!
>"And don't forget, we need to get more candy and music and salt and cider and food AND ANYTHING ELSE I FORGOT!"
>That was Scoots, being Scoots again
>Ever since they'd given their allegiance to the Dark Gods, Scootaloo had been so happy. She could finally go fast enough to make Rainbow Dash as proud of her as she deserved to be
>Applebloom returned her thoughts to the present. Their were two guards in the statue garden, and it was her job to take care of them.
>Khorne demanded it.


>"BLOOD FOR THA BLOOD GOD!"
>Applebloom didn't know where the words came from, but they sounded good coming out as she jumped the nearest guard
>He gaped as a yellow filly with a giant red bow jumped him from a bush, but the gape turned to a gasp when she brought down a rock on his head
>The guard dropped, and she ran for his partner, who was just as shocked as the first guard
>The rock hit him in his legs, knocking him to the ground
>She brought it down once on his head, then lifted it up for another swing
>BLOOD, BLOOD, BLOOD.
>She wanted to keep hitting him until there was nothing left to smash, but they had a more important job to do.
>The Statue. Discord.
>She dropped the rock and skipped over to Sweetie, who was helping Scoots get the ritual ready.



>There was a lot of chanting and other boring stuff, but Applebloom wasn't paying much attention
>She kept thinking about her rewards, the Gifts the Gods would give her
>She was thinking about how glad she was that Anonymous had opened her eyes to the glory of Chaos
>She couldn't wait for her reward. She'd show Applejack and Big Mac, too. She'd buck more apples than any of em ever could, with Khorne's strength flowing through her. Then she'd go find Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon, and give em' what for.
>Applebloom was jolted out of her thinking by Scootaloo shouting again for no apparent reason.
>"What the hay'd you do that for!?"
>"It was too quiet!"
>"Girls, hush, we're done!"
>The statue started cracking as Sweetie finished her ritual, the warp energy she channeled flowing into it
>Laughter filled the air around the three fillies, and Discord's voice entered their heads.
>"Ha-ha! Oh, it's good to be back! And it's you three again, letting me out? I think something like that deserves a reward!"
>Warp energy filled the air, along with the joyous shouts of the Cutie Mark Crusaders.
>"CUTIE MARK CRUSADER DAEMON PRINCES, YAAAAAAAAAY!"