Get Big (2017)

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INDOXXI
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Subtitles by explosiveskull

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[rock music]

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[soft music playing
in the distance]

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[both panting]

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Sorry.

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- It's okay.
- Yeah.

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[both panting]

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[man in the distance]
Hey, Nate, we're leaving.

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Okay.
[clears his throat]

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Can I just put it in?

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No, put a condom on.

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- Michelle, I don't think it's...
- Nate, put a condom on.

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You know what? It's fine.
I'll just go down on you.

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No, it's fine,
just stop shaking.

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I'm not shaking.

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Okay, right.

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- Uh-huh.
- Okay.

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[sighs]

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- [banging on door]
- [man] Wake up. We are going.

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Fucking...

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I think as I fingered you,

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my hands are, like,
super slippery.

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- Just give it to me.
- Okay.

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[sighs]

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Only these stupid free ones they
give you at the health center

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are impossible to open.

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Oh, okay, thanks.

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Okay.

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All right.

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Okay.

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[clears his throat]

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[banging on door]

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[Alec] Yo, Nate, you awake?

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What?

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[Alec] We're going to breakfast.
You wanna come?

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No. Well...

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- You wanna have breakfast?
- No.

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- No, we're good.
- [man] All right.

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[Nate] Yeah.

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I'm just...

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[Machelle] Nate,
do you have it?

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Yeah, almost, yeah.

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[sighs]

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Come on, fuck it.

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[banging on door]

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[Alec] Hey, did I leave
my bong in there?

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No, there's no fucking bongs
in here, man.

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[Alec] All right, dude.
Fuck.

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[sighs]

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[sighs]

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[sighs]

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What?

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[sighs]

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[sighs]

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[sighs]

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What do you think
the problem is?

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[sighs]

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I don't know. It's...
It's not like physical or...

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I don't know, it's so stupid.
It's like fucking stupid.

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- [sighs]
- Okay, are...

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Are you nervous or...?

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No, I'm not nervous.
I just... I don't...

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[sighs]

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[clicks his tongue]

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Maybe it's just...

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I don't know,
maybe you're just not

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the right girl for me.

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What?

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Yeah, I don't know, maybe...

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Maybe that's all it is, just...

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I don't know.

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[sighs]

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Are you serious?

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Uh...

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Wait, um, I don't know. Uh...

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You don't know?

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Okay. Oh, shit.

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What?

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I cannot believe that you are
blaming me for your problems.

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I'm not the right girl for you?

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No, I'm not blaming anyone,
I'm just...

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- I'm just... I don't know...
- What?

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A lot of people
aren't right for each other.

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It's not a big deal.

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Okay, so what? You wanna
stop seeing me? Is that it?

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No, of course not.

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Wow, you are an asshole, Nate.

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Just because you are
skinny and awkward

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that doesn't make you
a nice guy, okay?

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You're a fucking asshole.

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Well, you were kind
of pressuring me.

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I am so sorry that I wanted you
to do something

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other than go down on me
for once.

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I thought girls like that.

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Not when you're bad at it.

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[cell phone ringing]

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So, can I call you later or...

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[cell phone continues ringing]

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[sighs]

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Hello?

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Yo, Nate, it's Kahji.

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Hey, Kahji, what's up, dude?

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I just wanted to make sure you
and Alec were all set for today.

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[Nate] Today?
What do you mean?

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Today is my wedding, dawg.
Did you forget?

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Shit.

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[sighs]

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No, of course not, man, I...

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[Nate] We'll be there.
It's been on my calendar.

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Sweet.

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I'll text you the address
and information again

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to make sure you have it.

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[Kahji] Stoked to see you, boys.

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Stoked to see you, too, buddy.

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Keep it chinchilla.

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[sighs]

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Kahji is getting married today.

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[sighs]

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Fuck me.

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[electronic music playing]

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[music stops]

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[dog barking]

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Hello.

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[Nate] Hey, puppies.

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- Hi.
- Hi!

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Oh, my gosh, you made
such good time.

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There's no traffic.
It was the craziest thing.

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- Hey, how's it going?
- Oh, look at you!

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Hey.

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[dog barks]

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- Hey.
- You are taller.

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- Really?
- I think you're...

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I feel taller, yeah.

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Hey, did you like the sign
I put on the front door?

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I did, yeah.
Did you make that today?

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I texted you like two hours ago
that I was coming home.

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Yeah, and I ran to the store
and got all your favorites.

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Orange juice, Goldfish,
Gatorade, everything.

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- Sweet.
- Yes.

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So what do you wanna do?
Do you wanna watch a movie?

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Do you wanna go to a movie?

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We could hike with the dogs.

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We could also
go play putt-putt or...

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You're making a face.

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Yeah, I'm actually busy today,
I'm going to a wedding.

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I meant to tell you,
but I forgot.

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- Oh, you are?
- [Nate] Yes.

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Uh...

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It was a super
last-minute thing,

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but, yeah, I got to go,
I'm going to be busy all day.

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[dog whimpering]

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Oh, that's... well, that's kind
of neat going to a wedding.

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That's fun.

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- Yeah.
- Great.

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Well, good.

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- Yeah.
- It's good to see you, though.

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- So great you're home.
- I'm so excited.

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Do you have...
Is the breakfast ready?

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I'm starving.

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[bacon sizzling]

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I don't understand why are you
going to this guy's wedding

162
00:08:06,304 --> 00:08:08,203
if you aren't really
friends with him.

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Thank you, gracias.

164
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I mean,
we were friends with him.

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He was just like...

166
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He was just, like,
this really weird friend

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that we hung out with in
the high school, I don't know.

168
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Alec and I are kind of going
as a joke more than anything.

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Alec is going?

170
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Uh-huh.
Yeah, it's me and him.

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Oh.

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What?

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I don't know, I just thought
maybe you and Alec grew apart.

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Why do you still think
Alec is such a bad kid?

175
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Remember Susan Miller's son
who had to transfer schools

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because Alec
used to call him a faggot?

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00:08:38,636 --> 00:08:40,872
Mom, that was
like eight years ago.

178
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And that kid used to tuck
his pants into his socks.

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That is no reason
to call someone a faggot.

180
00:08:47,345 --> 00:08:48,944
It's just a hate speech, Nate.

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Might I remind you,
you have a gay uncle.

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I know.

183
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- Hey, Nate.
- Hey, Dad.

184
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- Jesus.
- Allegedly gay.

185
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Dad, he's gay.

186
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- He's gay.
- Yeah.

187
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Whatever.

188
00:09:03,360 --> 00:09:05,929
Jim, Nate was just telling me

189
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that he has a girlfriend
he's seeing at school.

190
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Yeah, I mean, she's not, like,
my girlfriend.

191
00:09:12,037 --> 00:09:13,435
We're just sort of seeing
each other.

192
00:09:13,437 --> 00:09:15,338
Well, I looked her up
on Facebook,

193
00:09:15,340 --> 00:09:18,174
and she is cute as a button.

194
00:09:18,176 --> 00:09:19,943
Mom, don't look her up
on Facebook.

195
00:09:19,945 --> 00:09:21,678
That makes me
super uncomfortable.

196
00:09:21,680 --> 00:09:24,012
I just picked her out
in a couple group shots

197
00:09:24,014 --> 00:09:25,714
and read a little bit
about her "About Me,"

198
00:09:25,716 --> 00:09:27,317
and then I liked
one group photo.

199
00:09:27,319 --> 00:09:28,418
- That was it.
- You liked a photo?

200
00:09:28,420 --> 00:09:30,152
It was a group shot.

201
00:09:30,154 --> 00:09:31,487
Oh, shit.

202
00:09:31,489 --> 00:09:32,288
Do you follow her?

203
00:09:32,290 --> 00:09:33,588
She'll think
I'm somebody's aunt.

204
00:09:33,590 --> 00:09:37,260
No, We have the same last name.
She's going to know it's you.

205
00:09:37,262 --> 00:09:40,329
Don't like any photos.
No social media.

206
00:09:40,331 --> 00:09:41,698
Delete your accounts.

207
00:09:41,700 --> 00:09:43,232
You don't need Facebook.

208
00:09:43,234 --> 00:09:44,032
I don't do the Facebook.

209
00:09:44,034 --> 00:09:44,934
I don't have time
for the Facebook.

210
00:09:44,936 --> 00:09:46,703
[Karen] Okay, I will go in
and unlike it.

211
00:09:46,705 --> 00:09:48,271
She will never...
I did it like eight minutes ago.

212
00:09:48,273 --> 00:09:49,338
Don't unlike it.

213
00:09:49,340 --> 00:09:50,073
She'll notice that you liked it
and unliked it.

214
00:09:50,075 --> 00:09:52,040
Just don't...
I don't know how...

215
00:09:52,042 --> 00:09:55,047
Just please delete
your accounts, please.

216
00:09:56,447 --> 00:09:58,982
And what the hell is going on
with your car, anyway?

217
00:09:58,984 --> 00:10:00,449
I looked inside,
there's fast-food bags,

218
00:10:00,451 --> 00:10:01,251
there's cups everywhere,

219
00:10:01,253 --> 00:10:03,185
you can't even see
the damn floor.

220
00:10:03,187 --> 00:10:04,721
I mean, it's kind
of disrespectful to us,

221
00:10:04,723 --> 00:10:05,822
Nate, seriously.

222
00:10:05,824 --> 00:10:08,024
Dad, how many times I told you
to get me a beater.

223
00:10:08,026 --> 00:10:09,358
I didn't want
a car that nice.

224
00:10:09,360 --> 00:10:10,528
You knew I was going
to trash it.

225
00:10:11,729 --> 00:10:12,996
What did we do wrong?

226
00:10:12,998 --> 00:10:15,100
I mean, what teenager complains
about driving a Range Rover?

227
00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:17,367
When I was a kid, my parents
didn't have the money

228
00:10:17,369 --> 00:10:18,767
to buy me a goddamn thing.

229
00:10:18,769 --> 00:10:20,402
You know where I slept
when I was a baby?

230
00:10:20,404 --> 00:10:22,204
I do, please tell me again.

231
00:10:22,206 --> 00:10:25,141
In a drawer, in their dresser

232
00:10:25,143 --> 00:10:26,309
that they stuffed blankets in

233
00:10:26,311 --> 00:10:27,979
'cause they couldn't afford
a crib.

234
00:10:29,147 --> 00:10:31,079
Dad, what difference does that
make to you if you're a baby?

235
00:10:31,081 --> 00:10:32,314
You have no memories
when you're a baby.

236
00:10:32,316 --> 00:10:33,318
That makes no sense.

237
00:10:34,319 --> 00:10:35,421
I got memories, kid.

238
00:10:37,455 --> 00:10:38,958
[Isabelle] It's ready.

239
00:10:43,027 --> 00:10:44,261
[Nate] Thank you.

240
00:10:44,263 --> 00:10:46,094
The drawer thing is getting
a little stale, honey, just...

241
00:10:46,096 --> 00:10:47,362
I'm just trying
to make a point, babe.

242
00:10:47,364 --> 00:10:48,798
[Nate] All right, guys.

243
00:10:48,800 --> 00:10:50,032
It's good to see you.

244
00:10:50,034 --> 00:10:51,267
- You're leaving already?
- Yeah.

245
00:10:51,269 --> 00:10:54,503
I told Alec I'd meet up with him
before 12:00, so I gotta go.

246
00:10:54,505 --> 00:10:56,104
- It's good seeing you, Dad.
- [Jim] All right, kid.

247
00:10:56,106 --> 00:10:58,540
- [Nate] Bye.
- Honey, you just got here.

248
00:10:58,542 --> 00:11:00,311
I know, I'll come home more,
I promise.

249
00:11:01,513 --> 00:11:02,478
Thank you so much for breakfast,

250
00:11:02,480 --> 00:11:04,546
Isabelle, thank you so much
for breakfast.

251
00:11:04,548 --> 00:11:05,550
[Nate] Love you guys, bye.

252
00:11:06,417 --> 00:11:07,450
[Jim] Bye.

253
00:11:07,452 --> 00:11:10,121
You are gonna be sober
at this wedding, right?

254
00:11:11,822 --> 00:11:12,921
What?

255
00:11:12,923 --> 00:11:14,457
I just know how crazy
Alec can get when he drinks.

256
00:11:14,459 --> 00:11:15,994
I don't want you
to get in trouble.

257
00:11:17,829 --> 00:11:19,098
We won't, I promise.

258
00:11:21,432 --> 00:11:22,433
Okay.

259
00:11:24,134 --> 00:11:25,801
All right.
Love you, guys. Bye.

260
00:11:25,803 --> 00:11:27,305
- Bye.
- [Jim] Bye.

261
00:11:29,840 --> 00:11:31,540
He's not gonna be sober.

262
00:11:31,542 --> 00:11:35,013
[rock music playing]

263
00:11:46,490 --> 00:11:49,427
[TV softly playing
on background]

264
00:11:52,596 --> 00:11:54,032
- Hmm...
- [Nate] Hey, Val.

265
00:11:55,166 --> 00:11:56,064
[Val chuckles]

266
00:11:56,066 --> 00:11:59,434
Well, look who's here,
the college boy.

267
00:11:59,436 --> 00:12:01,139
Yeah. Oh, sorry.

268
00:12:03,475 --> 00:12:06,608
So how are you liking school?

269
00:12:06,610 --> 00:12:08,644
It's good, I like it a lot.
It's a lot of fun.

270
00:12:08,646 --> 00:12:10,246
Oh, I bet.

271
00:12:10,248 --> 00:12:12,615
I'm sure the girls got
their hands all over you.

272
00:12:12,617 --> 00:12:13,516
[chuckles]

273
00:12:13,518 --> 00:12:14,485
Uh, I don't know.

274
00:12:15,486 --> 00:12:17,188
Well, I can't say I blame them.

275
00:12:21,191 --> 00:12:22,190
What?

276
00:12:22,192 --> 00:12:23,092
Yo.

277
00:12:23,094 --> 00:12:24,493
- Hey, what's up buddy?
- What's up, dude?

278
00:12:24,495 --> 00:12:25,529
Good to see you, man.

279
00:12:25,531 --> 00:12:28,264
Good to see you too, man.
What the fuck is this?

280
00:12:28,266 --> 00:12:29,565
You a vest guy now?

281
00:12:29,567 --> 00:12:31,467
Is this all the frat guys are
wearing at rich kid university?

282
00:12:31,469 --> 00:12:33,169
Stop touching me.
It's a nice vest.

283
00:12:33,171 --> 00:12:34,569
No, it's beautiful.
I'm just fucking with you, man.

284
00:12:34,571 --> 00:12:37,341
Hey, Mom, could you make us
some snacks?

285
00:12:38,442 --> 00:12:40,211
What do you expect me to make?

286
00:12:40,878 --> 00:12:43,382
You know, just some snacks.

287
00:12:44,382 --> 00:12:45,615
Like what kind of snacks?

288
00:12:45,617 --> 00:12:47,415
We have the... the...
the pizza,

289
00:12:47,417 --> 00:12:49,519
the bagels with the pizza on it
in the freezer.

290
00:12:49,521 --> 00:12:52,487
I don't know how to make fucking
pizza bagels, just...

291
00:12:52,489 --> 00:12:54,357
God, go to the Quick Mart.

292
00:12:54,359 --> 00:12:55,527
All right, Mom, forget it.

293
00:12:56,561 --> 00:12:57,628
[Alec] Fuck.

294
00:12:59,229 --> 00:13:01,499
[TV playing on background]

295
00:13:05,335 --> 00:13:07,536
[Alec] Oh, bam, dude.
Fuck, yes.

296
00:13:07,538 --> 00:13:08,603
[Nate] How do you shoot it
like that?

297
00:13:08,605 --> 00:13:10,640
You just gotta push
your joystick.

298
00:13:10,642 --> 00:13:11,907
[Alec] This one,
you're flicking left.

299
00:13:11,909 --> 00:13:13,242
[Nate] Why are there two...
This one?

300
00:13:13,244 --> 00:13:14,709
[Alec] It's the right joystick,
tard.

301
00:13:14,711 --> 00:13:15,646
[Nate] Oh.

302
00:13:16,648 --> 00:13:18,514
Dude, you know,
I was thinking about tonight

303
00:13:18,516 --> 00:13:20,382
and I really don't wanna go
to Kahji's wedding.

304
00:13:20,384 --> 00:13:21,617
I say we don't go.

305
00:13:21,619 --> 00:13:23,452
- Don't go to Kahji's wedding?
- I say we blow it off, dude.

306
00:13:23,454 --> 00:13:24,719
Just go get fucked up
or something.

307
00:13:24,721 --> 00:13:26,289
No, no, no, dude, we have to go.

308
00:13:26,291 --> 00:13:27,723
That'll break his heart
if we don't go.

309
00:13:27,725 --> 00:13:28,991
No, it won't.

310
00:13:28,993 --> 00:13:30,726
We weren't even really friends
with him in high school, dude.

311
00:13:30,728 --> 00:13:32,531
I haven't seen him
since graduation.

312
00:13:33,364 --> 00:13:35,298
We could do something fun,
like go to a bar.

313
00:13:35,300 --> 00:13:36,665
What bar is going to let us in?

314
00:13:36,667 --> 00:13:38,700
Dude, don't worry about it,
I got plenty of spots.

315
00:13:38,702 --> 00:13:40,937
Dude, stop. You don't have
any fucking spots.

316
00:13:40,939 --> 00:13:43,939
Every time you say,
"Oh, I know some bouncer.

317
00:13:43,941 --> 00:13:45,741
I know some guy
who's going to let us in,"

318
00:13:45,743 --> 00:13:47,376
You fucking don't,

319
00:13:47,378 --> 00:13:49,511
and we always end up
getting fucked up for no reason.

320
00:13:49,513 --> 00:13:51,213
Let's just go to the wedding.

321
00:13:51,215 --> 00:13:52,615
Dude, I really
don't wanna see Kahji,

322
00:13:52,617 --> 00:13:54,416
and his weird fucking family,

323
00:13:54,418 --> 00:13:57,285
and his mom
who's strangely hot.

324
00:13:57,287 --> 00:13:58,753
I mean, I think
it's going to be fucking lame.

325
00:13:58,755 --> 00:14:00,756
Plus, you know, what if his mom
is looking really good,

326
00:14:00,758 --> 00:14:02,525
and I drink
a little too much and...

327
00:14:02,527 --> 00:14:03,525
I end up wanting to fuck her?

328
00:14:03,527 --> 00:14:04,461
I won't be able
to control myself at that point.

329
00:14:04,463 --> 00:14:06,429
Yeah, you're right.
No, she'll be down.

330
00:14:06,431 --> 00:14:07,997
No, I see the face,
I see the face,

331
00:14:07,999 --> 00:14:09,064
you're super fucking pretty,
dude.

332
00:14:09,066 --> 00:14:10,632
She'll be down for sure.
We really shouldn't go.

333
00:14:10,634 --> 00:14:11,534
- You know what?
- You're right.

334
00:14:11,536 --> 00:14:13,236
Make fun of me now, dude,
but you won't

335
00:14:13,238 --> 00:14:15,338
when you walk in on me
fucking her doggy style

336
00:14:15,340 --> 00:14:16,374
like it's my job.

337
00:14:20,545 --> 00:14:22,777
Do you know this is going to be
his first kiss?

338
00:14:22,779 --> 00:14:24,679
The fuck are you talking about,
dude?

339
00:14:24,681 --> 00:14:26,716
Today at the wedding,
it's going to be the first time

340
00:14:26,718 --> 00:14:27,717
Kahji has ever kissed a girl.

341
00:14:27,719 --> 00:14:28,650
I swear to God.

342
00:14:28,652 --> 00:14:29,986
That's bullshit.

343
00:14:29,988 --> 00:14:31,154
Swear to God,
that's what he told me.

344
00:14:31,156 --> 00:14:33,455
Him and this girl he's dating
are both super religious,

345
00:14:33,457 --> 00:14:34,591
so they wanted to wait
until the priest says,

346
00:14:34,593 --> 00:14:36,726
"You may now kiss the bride"
to have their first kiss.

347
00:14:36,728 --> 00:14:38,560
It's what he told me.
Swear to God.

348
00:14:38,562 --> 00:14:39,996
That's the stupidest
fucking thing

349
00:14:39,998 --> 00:14:41,197
I've ever heard in my life.

350
00:14:41,199 --> 00:14:42,998
Yeah, but think about how funny
it's going to be to watch.

351
00:14:43,000 --> 00:14:44,133
Let's just go, man.

352
00:14:44,135 --> 00:14:45,603
There's nothing else to do
around here, anyway, please.

353
00:14:46,503 --> 00:14:47,569
Please.

354
00:14:47,571 --> 00:14:49,405
Please, please, please,
it'll mean so much to him.

355
00:14:49,407 --> 00:14:50,606
All right, fine.
Fuck.

356
00:14:50,608 --> 00:14:52,507
We'll go the wedding, man.

357
00:14:52,509 --> 00:14:53,575
Thank you.

358
00:14:53,577 --> 00:14:56,514
[videogame shooting sound]

359
00:14:58,715 --> 00:15:00,686
I actually might fuck
his mom, though.

360
00:15:05,422 --> 00:15:06,756
Dude, you want me to drive?

361
00:15:06,758 --> 00:15:08,657
Oh, yeah, sure.

362
00:15:08,659 --> 00:15:09,758
Knock yourself out.

363
00:15:09,760 --> 00:15:11,294
Oh shit, hold on.

364
00:15:11,296 --> 00:15:12,328
[Nate] What?
What? What? What?

365
00:15:12,330 --> 00:15:13,128
[Alec] Nothing, my neighbor's
just outside, man.

366
00:15:13,130 --> 00:15:15,399
I don't... I don't want him
to see me.

367
00:15:16,633 --> 00:15:18,300
Why not?

368
00:15:18,302 --> 00:15:20,670
[Alec] I don't know dude,
he's just an asshole.

369
00:15:20,672 --> 00:15:21,538
[Alec] Fuck, all right, come on.

370
00:15:21,540 --> 00:15:23,606
Just be quick.
Maybe he won't see us.

371
00:15:23,608 --> 00:15:24,575
Okay.

372
00:15:29,747 --> 00:15:31,414
[Alec] Dude, what the fuck,
where's the hole?

373
00:15:31,416 --> 00:15:32,448
[Nate] It's a button, dude.
It's a button.

374
00:15:32,450 --> 00:15:33,716
All right. Shh.

375
00:15:33,718 --> 00:15:34,650
[Alec] Shit.

376
00:15:34,652 --> 00:15:36,618
Hey, Alec.

377
00:15:36,620 --> 00:15:37,788
Fuck.

378
00:15:39,657 --> 00:15:41,259
Hey, Tommy.

379
00:15:43,661 --> 00:15:45,497
Goddamnit.

380
00:15:51,802 --> 00:15:53,468
You know, we're
in a pretty serious drought.

381
00:15:53,470 --> 00:15:55,771
I think your grass might be
green enough there, Tommy.

382
00:15:55,773 --> 00:15:57,772
What are you, a landscaper now?

383
00:15:57,774 --> 00:15:59,708
No, I'm an environmentalist.

384
00:15:59,710 --> 00:16:00,678
Do me a favor, okay?

385
00:16:01,546 --> 00:16:03,545
Can you stop openly trying
to avoid me?

386
00:16:03,547 --> 00:16:04,512
It's insulting.

387
00:16:04,514 --> 00:16:05,381
I'm not trying to avoid you.

388
00:16:05,383 --> 00:16:06,582
I just think you're
the kind of guy

389
00:16:06,584 --> 00:16:08,619
that maybe appreciate your space
more than most, you know?

390
00:16:10,488 --> 00:16:13,389
When am I going to get the money
for my car, Alec?

391
00:16:13,391 --> 00:16:14,623
It's been two weeks already.

392
00:16:14,625 --> 00:16:16,692
Tommy, I'm going to get you
your money for your car, okay?

393
00:16:16,694 --> 00:16:17,660
I promise.

394
00:16:17,662 --> 00:16:19,428
You know how annoying it is
not to be able

395
00:16:19,430 --> 00:16:20,496
to open my front door?

396
00:16:20,498 --> 00:16:21,764
Every time I wanna get in,

397
00:16:21,766 --> 00:16:22,765
I got to climb in
through the window

398
00:16:22,767 --> 00:16:23,734
like I'm in the fucking
"Dukes of Hazzard."

399
00:16:26,436 --> 00:16:27,670
Dude, what the fuck are
The Dukes of Hazzard?

400
00:16:27,672 --> 00:16:29,572
Don't be a smartass, Alec.

401
00:16:29,574 --> 00:16:31,439
I know you think you can weasel
your way out of this somehow,

402
00:16:31,441 --> 00:16:32,842
but you can't.

403
00:16:32,844 --> 00:16:36,112
If I don't get that money
by noon tomorrow,

404
00:16:36,114 --> 00:16:37,545
I'm gonna walk over
to your house

405
00:16:37,547 --> 00:16:39,548
and tell your mother
that you backed into it

406
00:16:39,550 --> 00:16:40,882
while you were drunk.

407
00:16:40,884 --> 00:16:44,322
Don't, man, I'm going to get you
your money, okay?

408
00:16:45,489 --> 00:16:47,490
You better hope so, Alec.

409
00:16:47,492 --> 00:16:48,760
You better fucking hope so.

410
00:16:51,729 --> 00:16:54,599
[water splashes]

411
00:16:56,868 --> 00:16:57,666
[car doors close]

412
00:16:57,668 --> 00:16:59,901
Goddamnit, dude.
What is this shit?

413
00:16:59,903 --> 00:17:01,937
Why do you trash this car, man?

414
00:17:01,939 --> 00:17:03,572
- I don't know.
- Why do you do it?

415
00:17:03,574 --> 00:17:04,609
I'm sorry.

416
00:17:05,475 --> 00:17:06,842
What happened
with your neighbor?

417
00:17:06,844 --> 00:17:08,479
Oh...

418
00:17:09,846 --> 00:17:12,714
I fucking backed up
into his car the other night

419
00:17:12,716 --> 00:17:14,416
when I was super fucked up.

420
00:17:14,418 --> 00:17:16,684
Dude, you need to stop drinking
and driving, man.

421
00:17:16,686 --> 00:17:17,589
[Alec] I know.

422
00:17:18,523 --> 00:17:20,155
I owe that dude three grand
for his car.

423
00:17:20,157 --> 00:17:21,623
It's fucking ridiculous.

424
00:17:21,625 --> 00:17:22,660
Fuck.

425
00:17:25,662 --> 00:17:27,798
Yo, is there any way you can,
like, loan me the money?

426
00:17:28,766 --> 00:17:30,936
I mean, I'll pay you back
as soon as I can.

427
00:17:32,537 --> 00:17:33,803
No, I mean, I would,

428
00:17:33,805 --> 00:17:36,972
but, like, my parents they check
my credit card accounts, so...

429
00:17:36,974 --> 00:17:38,640
I can call them
and explain the situation-

430
00:17:38,642 --> 00:17:39,709
I mean, they might...

431
00:17:39,711 --> 00:17:40,510
[Nate] Maybe they'll
help you out, I don't know.

432
00:17:40,512 --> 00:17:42,677
No, I don't want
your mom hating me

433
00:17:42,679 --> 00:17:44,515
any more than she already does.

434
00:17:45,683 --> 00:17:46,682
Whatever, let's just go.

435
00:17:46,684 --> 00:17:47,782
[engine starts]

436
00:17:47,784 --> 00:17:51,756
[fun, adventurous music]

437
00:18:03,935 --> 00:18:07,502
Dude, I mean, the fucking idiot
was parked on the curb.

438
00:18:07,504 --> 00:18:08,636
That's fucking illegal, okay?

439
00:18:08,638 --> 00:18:09,738
[Alec] There's...
No wonder I would've...

440
00:18:09,740 --> 00:18:12,674
[Alec] I would have fucking
hit it if I was sober.

441
00:18:12,676 --> 00:18:14,876
Dumbass drug dealer.
He's a fucking drug dealer.

442
00:18:14,878 --> 00:18:17,546
I didn't tell you that,
he's a fucking drug dealer.

443
00:18:17,548 --> 00:18:19,781
And he makes me feel
like I'm the bad guy.

444
00:18:19,783 --> 00:18:20,951
[Alec] It's ridiculous.

445
00:18:21,785 --> 00:18:23,485
Dude, every...

446
00:18:23,487 --> 00:18:24,653
what are you fucking doing?

447
00:18:24,655 --> 00:18:25,753
- [Alec] Hey.
- Huh?

448
00:18:25,755 --> 00:18:26,891
[Alec] What are you doing?

449
00:18:27,824 --> 00:18:30,225
I'm posting a video
on my Snap story.

450
00:18:30,227 --> 00:18:31,226
Dude, don't do that, man.

451
00:18:31,228 --> 00:18:32,994
That's just a fucking tool
the government uses

452
00:18:32,996 --> 00:18:34,696
to constantly survey us.

453
00:18:34,698 --> 00:18:37,700
Little camera on the front?
It's not just for selfies.

454
00:18:37,702 --> 00:18:39,768
Delete the app, okay?

455
00:18:39,770 --> 00:18:41,703
I can't dude,
I'm already addicted.

456
00:18:41,705 --> 00:18:43,505
Plus, my pledge bros and I
are trying to streak a hundred.

457
00:18:43,507 --> 00:18:44,839
We're super-close.

458
00:18:44,841 --> 00:18:45,910
Pledge bros?

459
00:18:47,078 --> 00:18:49,578
Yeah, pledge bros, they're
the guys that you pledge with

460
00:18:49,580 --> 00:18:50,782
before you get initiated.

461
00:18:51,581 --> 00:18:53,551
It's a fraternity thing,
it's hard to explain.

462
00:18:54,284 --> 00:18:57,685
Yeah, dude, sounds
super bro-ey and awesome.

463
00:18:57,687 --> 00:18:58,953
[chuckles]

464
00:18:58,955 --> 00:19:00,055
When are you going
to invite me up, man?

465
00:19:00,057 --> 00:19:02,524
- I wanna meet these pledge bros.
- [Nate] I will, man.

466
00:19:02,526 --> 00:19:03,893
Uh...

467
00:19:03,895 --> 00:19:04,996
When?

468
00:19:06,664 --> 00:19:08,297
Soon, man, I'm...

469
00:19:08,299 --> 00:19:09,868
I just been
like crazy busy, you know?

470
00:19:11,601 --> 00:19:12,835
How are the girls?

471
00:19:12,837 --> 00:19:14,669
- Super hot.
- [Alec] Fuck.

472
00:19:14,671 --> 00:19:16,739
Do you remember Machelle Lone
from high school?

473
00:19:16,741 --> 00:19:17,705
-[Alec] Yeah.

474
00:19:17,707 --> 00:19:18,776
Me and her are kind of dating.

475
00:19:20,677 --> 00:19:21,876
What? Really?

476
00:19:21,878 --> 00:19:22,746
Yeah.

477
00:19:24,849 --> 00:19:25,982
That's...

478
00:19:25,984 --> 00:19:27,816
I didn't even know you guys
went to the same school.

479
00:19:27,818 --> 00:19:28,951
She's your girlfriend?

480
00:19:28,953 --> 00:19:32,691
I don't know if you'd say
boyfriend-girlfriend, but...

481
00:19:33,623 --> 00:19:35,290
Yeah, I mean, no,
she's my girlfriend.

482
00:19:35,292 --> 00:19:36,992
Yeah, she's my girlfriend
for sure.

483
00:19:36,994 --> 00:19:38,594
Why?

484
00:19:38,596 --> 00:19:39,529
What do you mean why?

485
00:19:39,531 --> 00:19:41,030
Why would you have
a girlfriend in college?

486
00:19:41,032 --> 00:19:42,798
That's like...

487
00:19:42,800 --> 00:19:44,069
It's a rookie mistake,
my friend.

488
00:19:44,901 --> 00:19:46,335
Well, fuck, dude,
I thought you'd be stoked.

489
00:19:46,337 --> 00:19:48,037
Machelle was really cool
in high school.

490
00:19:48,039 --> 00:19:50,039
Dude, hookah bars were cool
in the high school, man.

491
00:19:50,041 --> 00:19:52,010
But you don't see us
doing that shit anymore.

492
00:19:53,811 --> 00:19:55,677
Come on, you're never thinking
about all the girls

493
00:19:55,679 --> 00:19:57,916
you could be getting down with
at these frat parties?

494
00:19:58,782 --> 00:19:59,848
I mean, not really,
to be honest, dude.

495
00:19:59,850 --> 00:20:02,521
Like, she's
pretty fucking cute.

496
00:20:03,353 --> 00:20:04,486
Let me ask you something.

497
00:20:04,488 --> 00:20:07,021
Do you have any specific
memories of brushing your teeth?

498
00:20:07,023 --> 00:20:07,889
Of brushing my teeth?

499
00:20:07,891 --> 00:20:09,157
[Alec] Brushing
your fucking teeth.

500
00:20:09,159 --> 00:20:12,094
Yeah, I have plenty of memories
of brushing my teeth, Alec.

501
00:20:12,096 --> 00:20:14,629
No, I'm talking
about one specific memory

502
00:20:14,631 --> 00:20:16,100
of brushing your teeth.
Can you think of one?

503
00:20:17,033 --> 00:20:18,770
- I don't know, I guess not.
- [Alec] Exactly.

504
00:20:19,637 --> 00:20:21,669
Because it's something
you do every day.

505
00:20:21,671 --> 00:20:22,771
Your brain gets so used to it

506
00:20:22,773 --> 00:20:25,674
that it doesn't make
any new memories from it, right?

507
00:20:25,676 --> 00:20:26,809
- Right.
- [Alec] Okay.

508
00:20:26,811 --> 00:20:30,011
So, therefore, having sex
with the same girl every day

509
00:20:30,013 --> 00:20:31,680
over and over and over again

510
00:20:31,682 --> 00:20:33,318
isn't gonna make
any new memories either,

511
00:20:34,349 --> 00:20:34,817
and you're gonna regret it
when you're old

512
00:20:34,819 --> 00:20:36,087
that you didn't
take advantage of being young.

513
00:20:37,053 --> 00:20:39,687
- [puffs]
- Change is a good thing, my man.

514
00:20:39,689 --> 00:20:41,790
You can't make every day
become the same cycle,

515
00:20:41,792 --> 00:20:42,994
or it's all
gonna be forgotten.

516
00:20:43,793 --> 00:20:46,060
Unless you save it all
on your Snap story.

517
00:20:46,062 --> 00:20:47,829
Right, just like every other
fucking retard

518
00:20:47,831 --> 00:20:49,732
in our generation.

519
00:20:49,734 --> 00:20:51,133
[Nate hisses]

520
00:20:51,135 --> 00:20:53,101
So where are we going?
What are we doing right now?

521
00:20:53,103 --> 00:20:54,403
[Alec puffs]

522
00:20:54,405 --> 00:20:55,874
We're going to smoke.

523
00:20:57,875 --> 00:20:58,907
You can if you want, man.

524
00:20:58,909 --> 00:21:00,776
I haven't really been smoking
that much lately.

525
00:21:00,778 --> 00:21:02,845
Well, that's too bad
'cause I just bought an eighth

526
00:21:02,847 --> 00:21:05,013
of the dankest weed
I've ever smoked in my life.

527
00:21:05,015 --> 00:21:06,848
[sniffs]

528
00:21:06,850 --> 00:21:07,649
Dude, what are you doing
buying weed

529
00:21:07,651 --> 00:21:08,651
when you owe
your neighbor money?

530
00:21:08,653 --> 00:21:10,418
Oh don't worry, man.
I'm gonna pay him back.

531
00:21:10,420 --> 00:21:11,753
I just thought that,
you know,

532
00:21:11,755 --> 00:21:12,954
we can fucking
get high together.

533
00:21:12,956 --> 00:21:13,989
I haven't seen you
in months, dude.

534
00:21:13,991 --> 00:21:15,193
This is going to be fun.

535
00:21:16,793 --> 00:21:17,859
[sighs]

536
00:21:17,861 --> 00:21:19,127
What kind of weed is it?

537
00:21:19,129 --> 00:21:20,665
Oh, I don't know.
Let me check, man.

538
00:21:21,398 --> 00:21:24,133
Purple Mountain Donkey Cock.

539
00:21:24,135 --> 00:21:25,434
[Nate laughs]

540
00:21:25,436 --> 00:21:26,868
What, dude?

541
00:21:26,870 --> 00:21:28,436
No, I don't fucking know
what it's called.

542
00:21:28,438 --> 00:21:30,105
It's just smokey, come on.

543
00:21:30,107 --> 00:21:31,040
Come on, dude.

544
00:21:31,042 --> 00:21:33,078
All right, all right, fine,
fine, fuck.

545
00:21:34,911 --> 00:21:36,779
[sighs]
We're going to the spot?

546
00:21:36,781 --> 00:21:38,180
[Alec] Oh, yeah.

547
00:21:38,182 --> 00:21:39,918
we're going to the spot.

548
00:21:45,022 --> 00:21:47,188
[Nate] Dude, I forgot
how sketchy this spot is, man.

549
00:21:47,190 --> 00:21:48,757
[Alec] What are you talking
about, man?

550
00:21:48,759 --> 00:21:49,457
This is great.

551
00:21:49,459 --> 00:21:50,559
There's joggers everywhere.

552
00:21:50,561 --> 00:21:52,961
Look at this fucking view, dude.
This is ridiculous.

553
00:21:52,963 --> 00:21:54,730
[Alec] Where are you gonna find
a view like this?

554
00:21:54,732 --> 00:21:56,898
You know, I used
to fuck Kelly here,

555
00:21:56,900 --> 00:21:59,233
like, all the time
in high school.

556
00:21:59,235 --> 00:22:01,739
No, no, no, Bridget.
That was Bridget.

557
00:22:02,907 --> 00:22:03,975
No...

558
00:22:05,208 --> 00:22:06,841
Yeah, that was Kelly.

559
00:22:06,843 --> 00:22:07,745
Right here.

560
00:22:11,448 --> 00:22:13,014
[Alec] Dude, what the fuck?
You're barely lighting it.

561
00:22:13,016 --> 00:22:14,753
Come on, get big
and snap the bowl.

562
00:22:16,454 --> 00:22:18,052
There you go.

563
00:22:18,054 --> 00:22:19,855
Wow.

564
00:22:19,857 --> 00:22:20,889
That's a big boy.

565
00:22:20,891 --> 00:22:22,491
- [police car siren wails]
- That's big boy move.

566
00:22:22,493 --> 00:22:23,559
Oh fuck, dude, fuck.

567
00:22:23,561 --> 00:22:25,927
[Alec] Put that shit down.
Put it down, put it down.

568
00:22:25,929 --> 00:22:27,995
[Alec] Oh, no.
Okay, swallow it.

569
00:22:27,997 --> 00:22:30,965
Dude, look at me right now.
Fucking swallow the smoke, dude.

570
00:22:30,967 --> 00:22:32,670
I can't have smoke in this car.

571
00:22:34,071 --> 00:22:36,105
- [coughs]
- [Alec] Oh no.

572
00:22:36,107 --> 00:22:38,072
Are you okay?
Are you okay?

573
00:22:38,074 --> 00:22:40,075
Listen, man, you really
shouldn't have smoked in here.

574
00:22:40,077 --> 00:22:41,109
What?

575
00:22:41,111 --> 00:22:42,211
Give me the fucking bowl.
Give it to me give me.

576
00:22:42,213 --> 00:22:43,848
Shit.

577
00:22:44,514 --> 00:22:46,280
[Alec] Give me the lighter, too.
Give me the lighter, hurry.

578
00:22:46,282 --> 00:22:47,915
- [pants]
- [Alec] All right.

579
00:22:47,917 --> 00:22:49,184
[Nate] Oh, God, no.

580
00:22:49,186 --> 00:22:50,955
Shh.

581
00:22:57,261 --> 00:22:59,228
All right, we should be good.
We should be good.

582
00:22:59,230 --> 00:23:01,129
Oh, fuck. Oh, shit.

583
00:23:01,131 --> 00:23:01,963
All right, just let me do
all the talking.

584
00:23:01,965 --> 00:23:02,732
[Alec] Just let me do
all talking.

585
00:23:02,734 --> 00:23:04,066
- Oh, shit.
- [Alec] We'll be fine.

586
00:23:04,068 --> 00:23:05,501
Oh, shit.

587
00:23:05,503 --> 00:23:06,801
Oh, shit.

588
00:23:06,803 --> 00:23:07,837
He is coming, man.

589
00:23:07,839 --> 00:23:08,971
Fucking get your head
in the game, all right?

590
00:23:08,973 --> 00:23:10,172
Let me do the talking.

591
00:23:10,174 --> 00:23:11,242
Let me do the talking.

592
00:23:14,078 --> 00:23:16,145
Hey there, officer,
how's it going?

593
00:23:16,147 --> 00:23:18,012
It's illegal to park a car here.

594
00:23:18,014 --> 00:23:19,248
You guys are going
to have to move.

595
00:23:19,250 --> 00:23:21,082
Okay, I'm sorry,
I didn't know that.

596
00:23:21,084 --> 00:23:22,986
We'll get out of your hair.

597
00:23:24,988 --> 00:23:26,725
Why are his eyes so red?

598
00:23:28,826 --> 00:23:29,791
Oh...

599
00:23:29,793 --> 00:23:31,159
Uh...

600
00:23:31,161 --> 00:23:32,961
He's in a frat.

601
00:23:32,963 --> 00:23:35,129
So they, like,
farted on his pillow

602
00:23:35,131 --> 00:23:36,898
'cause he's, like, pledging,
and so he got...

603
00:23:36,900 --> 00:23:39,070
[Alec] He got pinkeye
in both of his eyes.

604
00:23:41,138 --> 00:23:43,172
I smell marijuana in here.

605
00:23:43,174 --> 00:23:45,276
Will you boys mind stepping out
so I can search your vehicle?

606
00:23:46,176 --> 00:23:48,012
No, no, not at all.

607
00:23:48,846 --> 00:23:53,752
[suspenseful music]

608
00:24:06,597 --> 00:24:07,766
Fuck.

609
00:24:11,267 --> 00:24:12,336
You know what I should do?

610
00:24:14,170 --> 00:24:15,337
What?

611
00:24:15,339 --> 00:24:18,307
What I should do is write you
both up for misdemeanor

612
00:24:18,309 --> 00:24:20,244
for smoking cannabis
in a public area.

613
00:24:23,046 --> 00:24:24,114
But you know what?

614
00:24:25,148 --> 00:24:27,049
I was your age once, huh?

615
00:24:27,051 --> 00:24:28,184
I know how it is.

616
00:24:28,186 --> 00:24:31,089
Smoking a little weed
with your buddies, it's a blast.

617
00:24:32,188 --> 00:24:34,923
But sooner or later,
that weed you're smoking,

618
00:24:34,925 --> 00:24:36,992
it's gonna turn
into other things.

619
00:24:36,994 --> 00:24:40,130
Acid, powder, pills,
crystal, meth, crack.

620
00:24:42,198 --> 00:24:42,964
And before you know it,

621
00:24:42,966 --> 00:24:44,867
you're going down
on another man

622
00:24:44,869 --> 00:24:45,734
in a mall parking lot

623
00:24:45,736 --> 00:24:47,971
just to pay
for a dime bag of smack.

624
00:24:51,308 --> 00:24:53,011
[sighs]

625
00:24:56,213 --> 00:24:59,080
Look, all I'm saying is,

626
00:24:59,082 --> 00:25:01,617
is be careful out there, huh?

627
00:25:01,619 --> 00:25:04,418
And don't do stupid stuff
in public areas.

628
00:25:04,420 --> 00:25:05,823
Yes, sir.

629
00:25:07,657 --> 00:25:09,327
Consider this your warning.

630
00:25:12,629 --> 00:25:14,098
Thank you.

631
00:25:21,038 --> 00:25:22,937
What the fuck just happened?

632
00:25:22,939 --> 00:25:26,076
Dude, I'm like 85% sure
that guy blew someone for drugs.

633
00:25:27,343 --> 00:25:28,976
[Nate] Definitely.

634
00:25:28,978 --> 00:25:31,048
- What the fuck?
- It's fucked up, man.

635
00:25:35,349 --> 00:25:36,385
[Alec] Shit.

636
00:25:36,387 --> 00:25:38,923
I'll definitely die
if I go and get it, huh?

637
00:25:39,657 --> 00:25:41,960
- Yeah, you'll for sure die.
- Yeah.

638
00:25:42,693 --> 00:25:44,061
- [sighs]
- Fuck, man.

639
00:25:45,128 --> 00:25:46,430
I'm not going to Kahji's wedding
without any weed.

640
00:25:47,697 --> 00:25:49,431
We'll just pick up some more.
I'll pay for it, I don't care.

641
00:25:49,433 --> 00:25:51,332
Dude, the guy I get it from
is in Seattle,

642
00:25:51,334 --> 00:25:53,071
so that can't happen.

643
00:25:54,071 --> 00:25:55,974
Dude, there has to be someone
we know who can get us weed.

644
00:25:58,375 --> 00:26:01,676
Oh, shit, dude, there is.
Ernie Wolf.

645
00:26:01,678 --> 00:26:03,915
[Alec] He lives around here.
He's got a marijuana card.

646
00:26:05,482 --> 00:26:07,415
Dude, I fucking hate Ernie Wolf.

647
00:26:07,417 --> 00:26:10,051
Yeah, he's a tool,
but we kind of don't have

648
00:26:10,053 --> 00:26:11,488
any other options, do we?

649
00:26:12,956 --> 00:26:14,024
Should I call him?

650
00:26:14,692 --> 00:26:16,327
- Yeah, go ahead.
- [Alec] All right.

651
00:26:18,494 --> 00:26:23,234
[rock music]

652
00:26:33,176 --> 00:26:35,042
[I don't know how to say it.

653
00:26:35,044 --> 00:26:37,412
♪ I've been big motherfucker
since '92 ♪

654
00:26:37,414 --> 00:26:38,713
♪ Big bitches, big money ♪

655
00:26:38,715 --> 00:26:40,214
♪ What you gonna do? ♪

656
00:26:40,216 --> 00:26:41,249
♪ I'm into... ♪

657
00:26:41,251 --> 00:26:42,984
Holy shit,
look at that thing, man.

658
00:26:42,986 --> 00:26:44,219
You think
he'd let us drive it?

659
00:26:44,221 --> 00:26:45,988
There's no way
he'll let us drive it.

660
00:26:45,990 --> 00:26:49,457
[muffled rap music]

661
00:26:49,459 --> 00:26:50,626
All right.

662
00:26:50,628 --> 00:26:53,361
Hey, you know what? Let's just
buy weed from him and go.

663
00:26:53,363 --> 00:26:55,163
We don't have to be here
for too long if we do that.

664
00:26:55,165 --> 00:26:56,732
What are you talking about, man?
This was the plan.

665
00:26:56,734 --> 00:26:58,466
We were gonna come here,
smoke with him and leave.

666
00:26:58,468 --> 00:26:59,167
I don't want to be here
for too long.

667
00:26:59,169 --> 00:27:00,469
He doesn't need fucking money.

668
00:27:00,471 --> 00:27:01,736
We don't have
to buy weed from him.

669
00:27:01,738 --> 00:27:03,206
The guy's loaded.

670
00:27:03,741 --> 00:27:04,740
Come on, let's just do it.

671
00:27:04,742 --> 00:27:07,209
Maybe he's matured
since high school, you know?

672
00:27:07,211 --> 00:27:08,413
Stop judging people.

673
00:27:09,379 --> 00:27:11,213
- [Ernie] Who the fuck is it?
- [Alec] Dude.

674
00:27:11,215 --> 00:27:12,417
[Ernie laughs]

675
00:27:15,084 --> 00:27:17,051
Guys, it's me, man.

676
00:27:17,053 --> 00:27:17,786
Relax.

677
00:27:17,788 --> 00:27:19,754
Hey, it' not even loaded.

678
00:27:19,756 --> 00:27:21,490
Relax.

679
00:27:21,492 --> 00:27:23,759
[Ernie] You should've seen
your fucking face.

680
00:27:23,761 --> 00:27:25,159
What's up, bro?

681
00:27:25,161 --> 00:27:26,560
How you doing, huh?

682
00:27:26,562 --> 00:27:28,496
Good.

683
00:27:28,498 --> 00:27:30,132
Oh, come in.

684
00:27:30,134 --> 00:27:31,165
Come in, come in, come in.

685
00:27:31,167 --> 00:27:33,100
Nate, hurry up, come on.

686
00:27:33,102 --> 00:27:34,202
[laughs]

687
00:27:34,204 --> 00:27:36,504
That was fucking funny.

688
00:27:36,506 --> 00:27:37,639
Are you fucking kidding me?

689
00:27:37,641 --> 00:27:40,207
No, we're good, we're good.
He... He gave me a hug.

690
00:27:40,209 --> 00:27:41,143
It's not loaded.

691
00:27:41,145 --> 00:27:42,379
[puffs]

692
00:27:44,580 --> 00:27:46,248
In and out.

693
00:27:46,250 --> 00:27:47,049
It's not fucking funny, dude.

694
00:27:47,051 --> 00:27:48,282
- No, no...
- [Ernie] Come on, guys.

695
00:27:48,284 --> 00:27:49,353
I really hurt myself.

696
00:27:50,219 --> 00:27:52,122
Ooh!

697
00:27:54,558 --> 00:27:57,125
So what've you guys
been up to?

698
00:27:57,127 --> 00:27:59,360
You know, man, just the same
old shit, just chilling.

699
00:27:59,362 --> 00:28:00,595
Cool man.

700
00:28:00,597 --> 00:28:02,063
Cool.

701
00:28:02,065 --> 00:28:04,398
How's the pussy at school, Nate?

702
00:28:04,400 --> 00:28:05,399
[chuckles]

703
00:28:05,401 --> 00:28:07,101
Uh, yeah.

704
00:28:07,103 --> 00:28:09,136
Pussy is good, man, it's good.

705
00:28:09,138 --> 00:28:12,406
I bet those the sorority chicks
are so fucking hot down there.

706
00:28:12,408 --> 00:28:14,509
Is it just totally insane,
or what?

707
00:28:14,511 --> 00:28:16,544
Yeah, it's pretty insane,
yeah.

708
00:28:16,546 --> 00:28:19,114
Fuck, fuck.

709
00:28:19,116 --> 00:28:20,816
You lucky motherfucker.

710
00:28:20,818 --> 00:28:22,520
I wanna live vicariously
through your dick.

711
00:28:23,320 --> 00:28:25,220
[Ernie laughs]

712
00:28:25,222 --> 00:28:26,257
I do.

713
00:28:27,256 --> 00:28:29,290
[sighs]

714
00:28:29,292 --> 00:28:30,561
So what are you guys
doing today, huh?

715
00:28:31,762 --> 00:28:36,164
Well, Kahji from high school
is getting fucking married,

716
00:28:36,166 --> 00:28:37,264
so we're gonna go
to his wedding.

717
00:28:37,266 --> 00:28:38,399
- [Ernie] What?
- Yeah.

718
00:28:38,401 --> 00:28:40,367
- No way.
- [Nate] Yeah.

719
00:28:40,369 --> 00:28:43,238
Kahji, that motherfucker
is getting married?

720
00:28:43,240 --> 00:28:44,373
Jesus.

721
00:28:44,375 --> 00:28:46,640
Shit, I fucking thought
that he would die a virgin.

722
00:28:46,642 --> 00:28:49,543
[Alec] Yeah me too, man.
He probably still will.

723
00:28:49,545 --> 00:28:51,312
Such a fucking loser.

724
00:28:51,314 --> 00:28:52,547
No!

725
00:28:52,549 --> 00:28:54,215
He was such a fucking bitch!

726
00:28:54,217 --> 00:28:56,184
[Ernie laughs]

727
00:28:56,186 --> 00:28:57,284
Such a bitch.

728
00:28:57,286 --> 00:28:58,252
Right?

729
00:28:58,254 --> 00:28:59,421
Yeah, I mean,
the only reason we're going

730
00:28:59,423 --> 00:29:00,588
is just because apparently
it's gonna be his first kiss,

731
00:29:00,590 --> 00:29:04,859
and we just thought it'd be
funny to see high as fuck.

732
00:29:04,861 --> 00:29:06,360
Fucking smart.

733
00:29:06,362 --> 00:29:07,631
It's fucking genius.

734
00:29:08,498 --> 00:29:10,866
And I can help you out
with that, all right?

735
00:29:10,868 --> 00:29:12,367
Be right back.

736
00:29:12,369 --> 00:29:15,106
[Ernie hums]

737
00:29:19,243 --> 00:29:21,579
Dude, is this fucking cocaine?

738
00:29:23,179 --> 00:29:24,646
Look.

739
00:29:24,648 --> 00:29:26,149
Hmm.

740
00:29:31,522 --> 00:29:33,224
Yeah, that's definitely cocaine.

741
00:29:36,225 --> 00:29:38,361
[Ernie] Check this shit out,
boys.

742
00:29:39,362 --> 00:29:40,529
Holy fucking shit, dude.

743
00:29:40,531 --> 00:29:41,463
[Ernie laughs]

744
00:29:41,465 --> 00:29:43,565
I call her Dank Sinatra.

745
00:29:43,567 --> 00:29:45,399
All right, well,
you got me all excited, man.

746
00:29:45,401 --> 00:29:47,501
Let's fucking do it
and smoke it, right?

747
00:29:47,503 --> 00:29:48,403
All right.

748
00:29:48,405 --> 00:29:50,241
I'll call it in right now.

749
00:29:53,577 --> 00:29:55,242
You don't have any?

750
00:29:55,244 --> 00:29:57,546
No, no, no I use a...
I use a weed delivery service.

751
00:29:57,548 --> 00:29:59,446
You can have it delivered
when you have a card.

752
00:29:59,448 --> 00:30:00,549
Shh-shh, shh-shh.

753
00:30:00,551 --> 00:30:01,817
Hi there.

754
00:30:01,819 --> 00:30:04,688
[Ernie] Uh, yes, I would like
to place for delivery, please.

755
00:30:05,656 --> 00:30:07,521
Ernie Wolf.

756
00:30:07,523 --> 00:30:10,527
Give me a half ounce
of Dark Knight Kush.

757
00:30:11,395 --> 00:30:14,261
Yeah, just put it
on the card on file.

758
00:30:14,263 --> 00:30:16,133
[whispering] Regular member.

759
00:30:17,533 --> 00:30:19,967
Okay, 50 minutes.

760
00:30:19,969 --> 00:30:21,569
Perfect.

761
00:30:21,571 --> 00:30:23,204
[Ernie] Perfect.

762
00:30:23,206 --> 00:30:25,507
[Ernie] Okay, bye.

763
00:30:25,509 --> 00:30:28,276
Drugs are on the way, boys.

764
00:30:28,278 --> 00:30:29,610
There you go.

765
00:30:29,612 --> 00:30:31,413
You hungry?

766
00:30:31,415 --> 00:30:32,681
Want some food?

767
00:30:32,683 --> 00:30:34,449
I got pretzels and shit.

768
00:30:34,451 --> 00:30:36,550
Snacks?
I have Gushers. Huh?

769
00:30:36,552 --> 00:30:38,686
I think we're good, man.

770
00:30:38,688 --> 00:30:41,623
[Ernie hums]

771
00:30:41,625 --> 00:30:43,558
- Fifty minutes?
- Come on, they'll fly by.

772
00:30:43,560 --> 00:30:45,696
- Fifty minutes?
- Just relax, just relax.

773
00:30:47,965 --> 00:30:50,365
So...

774
00:30:50,367 --> 00:30:52,436
Boys...

775
00:30:55,371 --> 00:30:57,475
Before you got here...

776
00:30:58,975 --> 00:31:01,309
I took the liberty
of inviting over some company,

777
00:31:01,311 --> 00:31:02,610
which...

778
00:31:02,612 --> 00:31:04,613
I think you both
will enjoy very much.

779
00:31:04,615 --> 00:31:06,580
Uh-oh, some ladies?

780
00:31:06,582 --> 00:31:10,318
- Oh, yeah.
- Yes, dude, yes. Right?

781
00:31:10,320 --> 00:31:12,419
What's the scoop on them?
Do we know them, or they...

782
00:31:12,421 --> 00:31:13,687
Did they go to high school
with us or?

783
00:31:13,689 --> 00:31:15,456
No.

784
00:31:15,458 --> 00:31:19,563
You guys ever been
on Cityscape Top Biz?

785
00:31:22,331 --> 00:31:23,598
- Uh...
- No.

786
00:31:23,600 --> 00:31:24,799
- [Nate] No.
- Dude, check this shit out.

787
00:31:24,801 --> 00:31:26,637
Check this shit out.

788
00:31:27,404 --> 00:31:29,404
[Ernie] Look, this is
some high-end shit, all right?

789
00:31:29,406 --> 00:31:31,209
These chicks are totally shaved.

790
00:31:32,009 --> 00:31:33,742
She sat on my face last week.

791
00:31:33,744 --> 00:31:36,478
I swear to God, 4 p.m. Tuesday,

792
00:31:36,480 --> 00:31:39,383
this couch right there
where you're sitting.

793
00:31:42,051 --> 00:31:44,254
Anyway, I ordered two
about an hour ago.

794
00:31:45,421 --> 00:31:46,323
[Nate] Uh...

795
00:31:47,623 --> 00:31:49,357
- Ordered?
- Yeah.

796
00:31:49,359 --> 00:31:51,725
Sandy and Heather.

797
00:31:51,727 --> 00:31:53,528
I mean, that's probably
not even their real name,

798
00:31:53,530 --> 00:31:55,499
but who gives a fuck, you know?

799
00:31:56,433 --> 00:31:57,768
[Alec] Dude, you ordered
prostitutes?

800
00:31:58,769 --> 00:32:00,702
No.

801
00:32:00,704 --> 00:32:01,435
No, well...

802
00:32:01,437 --> 00:32:05,373
No, technically,
they're escorts.

803
00:32:05,375 --> 00:32:07,645
You pay them to hang out,
they don't have to fuck you.

804
00:32:09,545 --> 00:32:11,378
But they do!

805
00:32:11,380 --> 00:32:12,446
You can do
anything you want to them.

806
00:32:12,448 --> 00:32:13,717
It's fucking awesome.

807
00:32:14,850 --> 00:32:15,849
[sighs]

808
00:32:15,851 --> 00:32:17,685
Oh, shit, what time is it?

809
00:32:17,687 --> 00:32:19,087
Oh, they're gonna be here
soon.

810
00:32:19,089 --> 00:32:21,423
All right, yo, I'm gonna shave
my pubes, all right?

811
00:32:21,425 --> 00:32:23,357
There's beer in the fridge.
Help yourself.

812
00:32:23,359 --> 00:32:24,725
Help yourself, all right?

813
00:32:24,727 --> 00:32:27,428
Get ready to party,
they're gonna be here soon.

814
00:32:27,430 --> 00:32:28,532
Hmm.

815
00:32:30,067 --> 00:32:31,335
Oh, shit!

816
00:32:32,535 --> 00:32:34,772
Dude, that guy is fucking crazy.

817
00:32:45,415 --> 00:32:46,780
Yo...

818
00:32:46,782 --> 00:32:48,082
Let's get the fuck out here.

819
00:32:48,084 --> 00:32:48,983
What dude, why?

820
00:32:48,985 --> 00:32:50,019
We haven't even
smoked this thing yet.

821
00:32:50,021 --> 00:32:51,020
I don't wanna be here
for the prostitutes, dude.

822
00:32:51,022 --> 00:32:52,820
This is gonna be...
This is gonna be too weird.

823
00:32:52,822 --> 00:32:54,388
You don't have to fuck them.

824
00:32:54,390 --> 00:32:55,523
It'll be fine.
He even said so.

825
00:32:55,525 --> 00:32:58,092
I don't wanna sit here
while you and Ernie do, okay?

826
00:32:58,094 --> 00:32:59,761
I'm not gonna fuck
any prostitutes.

827
00:32:59,763 --> 00:33:02,696
Alec, this guy's coked out
in the middle of the day.

828
00:33:02,698 --> 00:33:04,465
He's fucking nuts.

829
00:33:04,467 --> 00:33:05,569
- So?
- [doorbell rings]

830
00:33:06,469 --> 00:33:07,370
Oh, shit.

831
00:33:08,437 --> 00:33:11,839
You guys stay seated, I got it.

832
00:33:11,841 --> 00:33:13,841
Oh, shit. Dude, let's go.
Let's just go.

833
00:33:13,843 --> 00:33:15,542
It's too late, man.
We are in this.

834
00:33:15,544 --> 00:33:16,778
- Let's just go.
- We are in this man.

835
00:33:16,780 --> 00:33:18,746
[Alec] Hang on tight.

836
00:33:18,748 --> 00:33:20,482
All right, great.

837
00:33:20,484 --> 00:33:21,886
Cool, this is happening, okay.

838
00:33:24,821 --> 00:33:28,589
Guys, this is Sandy,
and this is Heather.

839
00:33:28,591 --> 00:33:31,658
Ladies,
this is Nate and Alec.

840
00:33:31,660 --> 00:33:32,796
Hi, guys.

841
00:33:34,865 --> 00:33:36,830
[both clear their throat]

842
00:33:36,832 --> 00:33:38,665
Sit down.

843
00:33:38,667 --> 00:33:41,603
Oh, my god,
it is so hot outside.

844
00:33:41,605 --> 00:33:43,738
I know.
And it's not even summer yet.

845
00:33:43,740 --> 00:33:46,508
Wait, wait.
You know why that is, right?

846
00:33:46,510 --> 00:33:47,778
Global warming.

847
00:33:49,146 --> 00:33:50,412
Definitely.

848
00:33:50,414 --> 00:33:51,415
[Ernie] Scary shit.

849
00:33:52,682 --> 00:33:53,748
I mean, I don't know
the science of it all,

850
00:33:53,750 --> 00:33:56,617
but apparently
we are all fucked.

851
00:33:56,619 --> 00:33:57,754
Hmm.

852
00:33:58,522 --> 00:33:59,623
Yeah.

853
00:34:05,161 --> 00:34:06,761
Well, I'm gonna use
the restroom.

854
00:34:06,763 --> 00:34:08,896
Ernie, do you mind?

855
00:34:08,898 --> 00:34:12,599
Yeah, use mine.
Down at the end of the hall.

856
00:34:12,601 --> 00:34:13,701
[Alec] Thanks, man.

857
00:34:13,703 --> 00:34:15,740
[whispering] What are you doing?
What are you doing?

858
00:34:16,505 --> 00:34:19,706
Oh, my God, I love your vest.

859
00:34:19,708 --> 00:34:20,945
[Nate] Oh, no, it's...

860
00:34:22,545 --> 00:34:24,514
It's a...
It's a stupid vest.

861
00:34:25,215 --> 00:34:27,917
Oh, man, I feel
really lonely over here.

862
00:34:28,651 --> 00:34:30,388
I wanna come join you, guys.

863
00:34:40,529 --> 00:34:42,399
[sighs]

864
00:34:56,980 --> 00:34:58,980
It's hard

865
00:34:58,982 --> 00:35:00,681
to get to know somebody
when you're sitting

866
00:35:00,683 --> 00:35:02,683
from a distance like that,
you know?

867
00:35:02,685 --> 00:35:04,552
[Sandy] Hmm, yeah.

868
00:35:04,554 --> 00:35:06,624
Now we can get to know
each other even...

869
00:35:07,223 --> 00:35:08,255
...better.

870
00:35:08,257 --> 00:35:09,224
Yeah?

871
00:35:09,226 --> 00:35:10,824
[laughs]

872
00:35:10,826 --> 00:35:11,728
What do you think, Nate?

873
00:35:12,628 --> 00:35:15,433
Should we get to know
each other better?

874
00:35:17,734 --> 00:35:19,502
Uh...

875
00:35:20,770 --> 00:35:22,005
I don't know.

876
00:35:27,978 --> 00:35:29,980
This fucking guy.

877
00:35:30,947 --> 00:35:33,715
[Ernie] You know,
I think connections are

878
00:35:33,717 --> 00:35:37,018
the most important thing
in life.

879
00:35:37,020 --> 00:35:38,520
- Hmm.
- You know?

880
00:35:38,522 --> 00:35:39,454
It's the reason
we're all here.

881
00:35:39,456 --> 00:35:40,991
It's the reason
we all do what we do...

882
00:35:43,259 --> 00:35:45,527
...even if it's just physical.

883
00:35:45,529 --> 00:35:46,063
Do you agree?

884
00:35:47,531 --> 00:35:49,699
- [Sandy] Yeah.
- [Ernie] Yeah?

885
00:35:51,601 --> 00:35:52,503
[Sandy and Ernie moan]

886
00:35:54,571 --> 00:35:55,637
Okay.

887
00:35:55,639 --> 00:35:56,540
[pants]

888
00:35:59,743 --> 00:36:01,612
[both moan]

889
00:36:02,978 --> 00:36:04,679
You know, Nate,
my mom just called.

890
00:36:04,681 --> 00:36:07,315
The dog got out again, so we
gotta go help her find it.

891
00:36:07,317 --> 00:36:08,683
Oh, shit. Uh...

892
00:36:08,685 --> 00:36:09,786
Yeah.

893
00:36:11,020 --> 00:36:12,719
[Nate] We should definitely
go help her right now, right?

894
00:36:12,721 --> 00:36:13,587
What the fuck?

895
00:36:13,589 --> 00:36:15,956
Heather, it was so nice
to meet you.

896
00:36:15,958 --> 00:36:17,759
And it was...

897
00:36:17,761 --> 00:36:18,960
- [Nate] Sassy?
- Sandy.

898
00:36:18,962 --> 00:36:20,962
Sandy, it was so nice
to meet you, too.

899
00:36:20,964 --> 00:36:23,598
Ernie, good to see you again,
buddy.

900
00:36:23,600 --> 00:36:24,766
Thanks for having us
over, man.

901
00:36:24,768 --> 00:36:25,900
What, you're leaving?

902
00:36:25,902 --> 00:36:27,034
Yeah.

903
00:36:27,036 --> 00:36:28,036
Well, we gotta go find the dog

904
00:36:28,038 --> 00:36:29,971
before the kill shelter
does the fucking...

905
00:36:29,973 --> 00:36:30,840
you know, shoot the thing.

906
00:36:31,907 --> 00:36:34,608
[Nate] So great to see you guys.
Thank you.

907
00:36:34,610 --> 00:36:36,880
- Dude, is that an actual boner?
- Shut the fuck up. Let's go.

908
00:36:40,116 --> 00:36:41,018
[door closes]

909
00:36:44,955 --> 00:36:46,790
Do you still want to fuck?

910
00:36:49,058 --> 00:36:50,994
I mean, I guess.

911
00:36:54,730 --> 00:36:57,331
Holy fucking shit, dude,
that was fucking crazy man.

912
00:36:57,333 --> 00:36:58,366
Yeah.

913
00:36:58,368 --> 00:36:59,900
[Nate] Oh, my God.
Thank you for saving me, dude.

914
00:36:59,902 --> 00:37:00,969
Dude, no problem.

915
00:37:00,971 --> 00:37:03,804
Dude, those girls were actually,
like, kind of hot.

916
00:37:03,806 --> 00:37:05,609
Yeah, man, they're okay.

917
00:37:06,810 --> 00:37:08,545
Dude, the one sitting next to me
was like...

918
00:37:09,645 --> 00:37:12,346
She was ready to go, dude,
like, her hand was like...

919
00:37:12,348 --> 00:37:13,815
It wasn't touching my dick,
but, dude,

920
00:37:13,817 --> 00:37:15,953
it was, like, really fucking
close to my dick.

921
00:37:17,853 --> 00:37:18,953
Dude, you're
pretty fucking giddy

922
00:37:18,955 --> 00:37:20,688
for how terrified you were
back there.

923
00:37:20,690 --> 00:37:21,855
Can we go back?

924
00:37:21,857 --> 00:37:22,857
Can you just drop me off?

925
00:37:22,859 --> 00:37:24,692
Still got a boner?

926
00:37:24,694 --> 00:37:26,694
[Alec chuckles]
You do.

927
00:37:26,696 --> 00:37:28,096
Let me see it.

928
00:37:28,098 --> 00:37:30,063
Dude, can you drop me...

929
00:37:30,065 --> 00:37:31,366
Dude, drop me off, man.

930
00:37:31,368 --> 00:37:32,835
[both laugh]

931
00:37:34,136 --> 00:37:36,670
All the Mexican food
in my school sucks, dude.

932
00:37:36,672 --> 00:37:37,838
I'm not defensive about anything

933
00:37:37,840 --> 00:37:40,375
about our hometown at all,
like, fuck our football teams,

934
00:37:40,377 --> 00:37:41,875
fuck our baseball teams,
I don't give a shit,

935
00:37:41,877 --> 00:37:43,844
but we have
the best Mexican food.

936
00:37:43,846 --> 00:37:44,779
- [Nate] For sure.
- Hello.

937
00:37:44,781 --> 00:37:46,648
My name is Linda,
I'll be your server today.

938
00:37:46,650 --> 00:37:48,382
Can I get you guys started
with something to drink?

939
00:37:48,384 --> 00:37:49,817
[sighs]
Splendid.

940
00:37:49,819 --> 00:37:51,085
Uh...

941
00:37:51,087 --> 00:37:54,721
Let's go with the Casanova IPA.
Let's get a little weird, right?

942
00:37:54,723 --> 00:37:55,857
Okay.

943
00:37:55,859 --> 00:37:57,692
Can I see some ID?

944
00:37:57,694 --> 00:37:58,728
Yeah.

945
00:38:02,031 --> 00:38:03,130
All right, Linda,
here's the deal.

946
00:38:03,132 --> 00:38:04,732
I'm not actually 21,

947
00:38:04,734 --> 00:38:06,933
I'm 19, but I just
ordered the Casanova

948
00:38:06,935 --> 00:38:09,070
because I know that it would
really complement

949
00:38:09,072 --> 00:38:10,871
the meal I'm about to order.

950
00:38:10,873 --> 00:38:12,873
And if allowed
such a privilege,

951
00:38:12,875 --> 00:38:13,741
I will make sure that you see

952
00:38:13,743 --> 00:38:15,976
a very generous tip
coming your way.

953
00:38:15,978 --> 00:38:17,811
If you're not 21,
you have to get something else.

954
00:38:17,813 --> 00:38:19,746
I understand that,
I understand that.

955
00:38:19,748 --> 00:38:20,614
And you know what?

956
00:38:20,616 --> 00:38:21,416
I don't wanna make you
uncomfortable

957
00:38:21,418 --> 00:38:22,219
in your place of work.

958
00:38:25,755 --> 00:38:28,021
But if we can both look
at this situation realistically,

959
00:38:28,023 --> 00:38:29,056
all right?

960
00:38:29,058 --> 00:38:30,157
College students
such as me and my friend here

961
00:38:30,159 --> 00:38:31,692
drink on average

962
00:38:31,694 --> 00:38:34,764
twice as much as an actual adult
on a weekly basis.

963
00:38:35,764 --> 00:38:38,099
I only have a few years
until I turn 21,

964
00:38:38,101 --> 00:38:39,433
and by then, I guarantee

965
00:38:39,435 --> 00:38:41,101
I'll be no more mature
than I am right now.

966
00:38:41,103 --> 00:38:42,904
I also understand
it's a liability for you

967
00:38:42,906 --> 00:38:44,905
allowing us to drink, right?

968
00:38:44,907 --> 00:38:48,241
But the fact is our tolerance
is so ridiculously high

969
00:38:48,243 --> 00:38:51,712
from the gargantuan amounts
of alcohol we consume weekly,

970
00:38:51,714 --> 00:38:54,047
I don't think it would affect
our blood alcohol content

971
00:38:54,049 --> 00:38:55,183
even a little bit.

972
00:38:55,185 --> 00:38:56,951
[Alec] So it's really
a win-win here.

973
00:38:56,953 --> 00:38:58,085
It's kind of a no-brainer,
right?

974
00:38:58,087 --> 00:38:59,987
The business you work for
is going to make more money,

975
00:38:59,989 --> 00:39:02,190
I will enjoy my dining
experience that much more,

976
00:39:02,192 --> 00:39:05,759
and you personally will receive
a fatty tip coming your way.

977
00:39:05,761 --> 00:39:07,196
What do you say, Linda?
Let's get it going.

978
00:39:12,268 --> 00:39:13,768
ID, please.

979
00:39:13,770 --> 00:39:15,203
All right.

980
00:39:15,205 --> 00:39:17,107
I like where this is going.

981
00:39:19,808 --> 00:39:21,911
Okay, one IPA.

982
00:39:23,078 --> 00:39:24,180
You?

983
00:39:28,217 --> 00:39:30,751
Uh...
[clears his throat]

984
00:39:30,753 --> 00:39:32,786
I also think that a beer
would really complement...

985
00:39:32,788 --> 00:39:34,757
- Just give me your ID.
- Okay.

986
00:39:36,292 --> 00:39:37,994
Cool.

987
00:39:41,230 --> 00:39:43,029
- Your beers.
- Thank you very much.

988
00:39:43,031 --> 00:39:44,297
You ready to order?

989
00:39:44,299 --> 00:39:46,867
[Nate] Yes, we're gonna get two
California burritos, please.

990
00:39:46,869 --> 00:39:48,503
[Linda] Okay. That it?

991
00:39:48,505 --> 00:39:49,337
- Yes.
- Okay.

992
00:39:49,339 --> 00:39:51,172
- Thank you.
- Yep. I'll grab those.

993
00:39:51,174 --> 00:39:52,909
[Nate] Yeah, sure.

994
00:40:03,520 --> 00:40:06,322
[indistinct chatter]

995
00:40:08,190 --> 00:40:09,123
Shh.

996
00:40:09,125 --> 00:40:11,328
- Okay, okay.
- I think I'm going to get...

997
00:40:16,065 --> 00:40:17,864
Dude, please don't take
a picture of your fucking beer.

998
00:40:17,866 --> 00:40:18,833
No, I wasn't.

999
00:40:18,835 --> 00:40:19,833
Yeah, sure you weren't.

1000
00:40:19,835 --> 00:40:20,967
Fuck yeah, dude.

1001
00:40:20,969 --> 00:40:22,270
All right, cheers, motherfucker.

1002
00:40:22,272 --> 00:40:23,170
Cheers, buddy.

1003
00:40:23,172 --> 00:40:24,774
To your mom.

1004
00:40:28,210 --> 00:40:30,080
[Alec gulping]

1005
00:40:32,214 --> 00:40:34,315
Oh, you won't finish that.

1006
00:40:34,317 --> 00:40:36,786
You won't do it.
You're too much of a bitch.

1007
00:40:37,853 --> 00:40:38,820
Wow.

1008
00:40:38,822 --> 00:40:40,121
That's weird, dude, it's gone.

1009
00:40:40,123 --> 00:40:41,288
[burps]

1010
00:40:41,290 --> 00:40:42,255
Are you okay?

1011
00:40:42,257 --> 00:40:43,590
I'm great, dude.

1012
00:40:43,592 --> 00:40:45,358
- You don't look okay.
- That was much-needed.

1013
00:40:45,360 --> 00:40:47,360
[burps]

1014
00:40:47,362 --> 00:40:48,561
Oh, shit. Ooh.

1015
00:40:48,563 --> 00:40:51,998
See that dark haired girl?
Just, like, keeps staring at me.

1016
00:40:52,000 --> 00:40:53,967
[Alec] No shit.
Damn, they're all hot.

1017
00:40:53,969 --> 00:40:54,936
[Nate] Yeah, they are all hot.

1018
00:40:54,938 --> 00:40:56,270
[Alec] They're some solid beans.

1019
00:40:56,272 --> 00:40:58,605
She's one of the cutest girls
I've ever seen.

1020
00:40:58,607 --> 00:41:00,174
Interesting, man.

1021
00:41:00,176 --> 00:41:02,175
Solid.
Good work, my friend.

1022
00:41:02,177 --> 00:41:04,045
Listen, I was peeing,
I was getting some deep thoughts

1023
00:41:04,047 --> 00:41:05,579
and I think

1024
00:41:05,581 --> 00:41:07,882
Kahji's wedding
is a bad idea, man.

1025
00:41:07,884 --> 00:41:09,317
We should just fucking bail.
We don't have any weed.

1026
00:41:09,319 --> 00:41:10,585
I don't know
where we're gonna get

1027
00:41:10,587 --> 00:41:11,853
any weed at this point.

1028
00:41:11,855 --> 00:41:12,853
Pointless, right?

1029
00:41:12,855 --> 00:41:14,322
We can just go sober.
Who cares?

1030
00:41:14,324 --> 00:41:15,223
Yeah, fucking right, dude.

1031
00:41:15,225 --> 00:41:16,991
I'm not going
to Kahji's wedding sober.

1032
00:41:16,993 --> 00:41:18,391
That's the whole point
of going to Kahji's wedding,

1033
00:41:18,393 --> 00:41:19,626
it's to go not sober.

1034
00:41:19,628 --> 00:41:20,661
Plus, I need to figure out

1035
00:41:20,663 --> 00:41:22,262
how the fuck I'm going
to pay my neighbor back.

1036
00:41:22,264 --> 00:41:24,065
It's a real issue at hand.

1037
00:41:24,067 --> 00:41:25,199
Oh, hey, Linda.

1038
00:41:25,201 --> 00:41:26,000
Yeah?

1039
00:41:26,002 --> 00:41:27,634
Uh, I don't know
what came over me,

1040
00:41:27,636 --> 00:41:30,938
but I would like another beer.

1041
00:41:30,940 --> 00:41:32,340
No, you said you're only going
to order one.

1042
00:41:32,342 --> 00:41:34,909
Linda, honey, I understand
your frustration, okay?

1043
00:41:34,911 --> 00:41:37,177
I really do,
I've been there before.

1044
00:41:37,179 --> 00:41:38,945
But I can go ask
your manager right now

1045
00:41:38,947 --> 00:41:40,280
why I'm being denied service.

1046
00:41:40,282 --> 00:41:42,148
I can do that.

1047
00:41:42,150 --> 00:41:43,351
If he asked you,
you're gonna have to tell him

1048
00:41:43,353 --> 00:41:45,353
we're under 21, and that's why,

1049
00:41:45,355 --> 00:41:46,520
which would be awkward
because that would make you

1050
00:41:46,522 --> 00:41:49,956
the waitress who illegally
and knowingly served minors

1051
00:41:49,958 --> 00:41:52,061
alcohol after checking
both of their IDs.

1052
00:41:52,895 --> 00:41:54,628
[Alec] Doesn't look too good
on your part.

1053
00:41:54,630 --> 00:41:55,965
Actually, I hear
it's quite frowned upon.

1054
00:41:57,232 --> 00:42:01,138
So if we could just do the right
thing for both of us, you know.

1055
00:42:02,371 --> 00:42:04,304
You're a little extortionist.

1056
00:42:04,306 --> 00:42:05,408
And you're punk.

1057
00:42:08,110 --> 00:42:09,279
I'm a punk?

1058
00:42:21,023 --> 00:42:22,359
Fuck, dude.

1059
00:42:23,692 --> 00:42:25,326
Fucking bullshit.

1060
00:42:25,328 --> 00:42:27,962
Hey, those girls are coming.
Put the cigarette out.

1061
00:42:27,964 --> 00:42:29,396
- Quickly.
- All right, all right.

1062
00:42:29,398 --> 00:42:34,668
[clears his throat]

1063
00:42:34,670 --> 00:42:36,237
- Hi.
- [Nate] Hi.

1064
00:42:36,239 --> 00:42:37,404
Hi. Sorry, I'm...
I'm Amy.

1065
00:42:37,406 --> 00:42:38,306
I'm Nate. Nice to meet you.

1066
00:42:38,308 --> 00:42:39,574
- I'm Alec.
- Amy. Nice to meet you, guys.

1067
00:42:39,576 --> 00:42:44,045
Uh, sorry, this is kind of weird
coming on to you guys like this.

1068
00:42:44,047 --> 00:42:45,315
No, no, it's fine.

1069
00:42:46,114 --> 00:42:47,181
Well, we were just wondering

1070
00:42:47,183 --> 00:42:50,250
if you guys wouldn't mind
doing us a favor maybe.

1071
00:42:50,252 --> 00:42:52,453
If you don't want to,
we totally get it, just...

1072
00:42:52,455 --> 00:42:55,056
Uh, yeah, sure, what is it?

1073
00:42:55,058 --> 00:42:57,991
Uh, okay, well, we're going
to this party tonight and...

1074
00:42:57,993 --> 00:42:59,427
Oh, oh, I like
this favor already.

1075
00:42:59,429 --> 00:43:01,027
[Amy chuckles]

1076
00:43:01,029 --> 00:43:02,195
All right.

1077
00:43:02,197 --> 00:43:03,264
Well, we're going to this party
and we were wondering

1078
00:43:03,266 --> 00:43:05,502
if you guys wouldn't mind
buying us some alcohol.

1079
00:43:06,435 --> 00:43:08,034
Uh, uh...

1080
00:43:08,036 --> 00:43:09,737
If you don't want to,
we totally understand.

1081
00:43:09,739 --> 00:43:11,975
It's just I don't...

1082
00:43:13,743 --> 00:43:16,177
- I mean, we would, but...
- Yeah, no, we totally would.

1083
00:43:16,179 --> 00:43:17,744
- Let's do it.
- Really?

1084
00:43:17,746 --> 00:43:19,313
Yeah, absolutely, absolutely.

1085
00:43:19,315 --> 00:43:20,348
What are you guys
doing over there?

1086
00:43:20,350 --> 00:43:22,516
Stop hiding, come on.
Come on, get over here.

1087
00:43:22,518 --> 00:43:23,750
- Just get over here.
- Awesome. Thank you, guys.

1088
00:43:23,752 --> 00:43:25,987
[Alec] Come on.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1089
00:43:25,989 --> 00:43:27,020
- There you are.
- [Amy] Thank you.

1090
00:43:27,022 --> 00:43:27,990
Absolutely.

1091
00:43:29,092 --> 00:43:31,324
Get comfy. Look out,
it's a little messy in there.

1092
00:43:31,326 --> 00:43:32,492
[Alec] This guy.

1093
00:43:32,494 --> 00:43:34,462
You good? All right.

1094
00:43:34,464 --> 00:43:35,230
Let's go.

1095
00:43:35,232 --> 00:43:37,465
What?
What are you doing dude?

1096
00:43:37,467 --> 00:43:38,766
We can't buy alcohol.

1097
00:43:38,768 --> 00:43:40,500
Don't give me that, dude.
Don't give me that.

1098
00:43:40,502 --> 00:43:43,137
Come on, we'll figure it out.
We'll figure it out.

1099
00:43:43,139 --> 00:43:44,105
Get in.

1100
00:43:44,107 --> 00:43:45,271
All right, all right.

1101
00:43:45,273 --> 00:43:47,041
All right, so, Amy,
I got your name.

1102
00:43:47,043 --> 00:43:48,009
What are you guys' names?

1103
00:43:48,011 --> 00:43:49,409
- I'm Tracy.
- Hannah.

1104
00:43:49,411 --> 00:43:51,012
[Alec] Nice to meet you guys.

1105
00:43:51,014 --> 00:43:52,413
You're gonna have
to forgive me if I forget.

1106
00:43:52,415 --> 00:43:53,748
I'm awful with names.

1107
00:43:53,750 --> 00:43:55,081
- [girls chuckle]
- [Alec] I'm one of those guys.

1108
00:43:55,083 --> 00:43:56,349
It's okay.

1109
00:43:56,351 --> 00:43:57,955
All right, cool.

1110
00:44:05,027 --> 00:44:06,460
All right, all right, all right.

1111
00:44:06,462 --> 00:44:08,094
I don't wanna lie to you guys.

1112
00:44:08,096 --> 00:44:09,365
We're only 19.

1113
00:44:10,232 --> 00:44:12,500
And we don't have fakes.

1114
00:44:12,502 --> 00:44:14,434
We just kind of sweet-talked
the waitress

1115
00:44:14,436 --> 00:44:17,570
in the restaurant
into giving us alcohol, so...

1116
00:44:17,572 --> 00:44:19,407
Honestly,
it might be kind of tough

1117
00:44:19,409 --> 00:44:20,544
to get you guys booze.

1118
00:44:21,576 --> 00:44:23,376
Oh, uh...

1119
00:44:23,378 --> 00:44:24,378
But I do have something

1120
00:44:24,380 --> 00:44:27,150
I think might make your night
even more fun.

1121
00:44:27,784 --> 00:44:29,353
Okay, what is it?

1122
00:44:31,520 --> 00:44:33,554
So I'm thinking,
like, 60 bucks a gram,

1123
00:44:33,556 --> 00:44:35,188
five-hundred
for the whole thing,

1124
00:44:35,190 --> 00:44:36,456
which is actually
a pretty good deal.

1125
00:44:36,458 --> 00:44:38,058
It'll save you a lot of money
in the long haul.

1126
00:44:38,060 --> 00:44:39,360
Alec, dude, what the fuck?

1127
00:44:39,362 --> 00:44:40,594
Is that cocaine?

1128
00:44:40,596 --> 00:44:42,228
No, it's baking soda.
Yeah, it's cocaine.

1129
00:44:42,230 --> 00:44:43,530
Alec, what are you doing, dude?
What?

1130
00:44:43,532 --> 00:44:44,532
So what do you guys think?

1131
00:44:44,534 --> 00:44:47,101
Uh, we don't really do that.

1132
00:44:47,103 --> 00:44:48,101
- Yeah, no.
- Sorry.

1133
00:44:48,103 --> 00:44:49,837
Oh, okay. Well, we can...
we can bump it down

1134
00:44:49,839 --> 00:44:50,404
to 50 if you guys want.

1135
00:44:50,406 --> 00:44:52,139
No, you know, it's okay.

1136
00:44:52,141 --> 00:44:53,306
It was nice
meeting you guys, though.

1137
00:44:53,308 --> 00:44:55,076
- Bye.
- Thanks.

1138
00:44:55,078 --> 00:44:56,277
Oh, okay. Uh...

1139
00:44:56,279 --> 00:44:57,844
Uh, hey, uh...

1140
00:44:57,846 --> 00:44:58,579
Nice to meet you.

1141
00:44:58,581 --> 00:44:59,549
[car door closes]

1142
00:45:03,585 --> 00:45:05,421
That went downhill fast.

1143
00:45:08,223 --> 00:45:11,224
Gosh, dude,
they were so fucking down.

1144
00:45:11,226 --> 00:45:12,529
[sighs]

1145
00:45:16,098 --> 00:45:17,500
Fuck it.

1146
00:45:22,337 --> 00:45:24,206
Did you steal that from Ernie?

1147
00:45:25,273 --> 00:45:27,875
Uh, no, I borrowed it from him.

1148
00:45:27,877 --> 00:45:30,311
What the fuck
is the matter with you, man?

1149
00:45:30,313 --> 00:45:31,445
Are you out
of your fucking mind?

1150
00:45:31,447 --> 00:45:34,315
Are you fucking retarded?
Did you see his fucking gun?

1151
00:45:34,317 --> 00:45:36,483
He's gonna fucking kill us,
you idiot.

1152
00:45:36,485 --> 00:45:38,152
Calm down, all right?

1153
00:45:38,154 --> 00:45:39,286
He's not gonna fucking notice.

1154
00:45:39,288 --> 00:45:40,654
Don't push me like that.

1155
00:45:40,656 --> 00:45:41,822
What the fuck were you thinking

1156
00:45:41,824 --> 00:45:43,858
selling cocaine to girls
in high school like that, man?

1157
00:45:43,860 --> 00:45:44,925
I was thinking

1158
00:45:44,927 --> 00:45:46,527
that I owe my neighbor
3000 dollars by tomorrow,

1159
00:45:46,529 --> 00:45:47,862
so I'm just trying
to make some money.

1160
00:45:47,864 --> 00:45:49,163
Forgive me
for being desperate, all right?

1161
00:45:49,165 --> 00:45:50,067
[Nate] Uh...

1162
00:45:51,333 --> 00:45:52,465
I'm too old
to still be putting up

1163
00:45:52,467 --> 00:45:53,534
with this shit, man, seriously.

1164
00:45:53,536 --> 00:45:56,203
This is fucking bullshit.

1165
00:45:56,205 --> 00:45:57,340
[sighs]

1166
00:45:59,342 --> 00:46:01,175
All right, dude,
I get you're upset

1167
00:46:01,177 --> 00:46:02,175
and I apologize
for what happened,

1168
00:46:02,177 --> 00:46:03,878
but can you get off
your fucking high horse

1169
00:46:03,880 --> 00:46:05,549
for a second?
It's getting annoying.

1170
00:46:07,250 --> 00:46:08,449
What are you talking about?

1171
00:46:08,451 --> 00:46:10,617
I mean, dude, just 'cause you go
to some fancy ass college

1172
00:46:10,619 --> 00:46:12,353
with all
your rich fucking friends

1173
00:46:12,355 --> 00:46:14,355
doesn't mean you're super mature
all of a sudden.

1174
00:46:14,357 --> 00:46:16,190
Well, I'm sorry to say it, Alec,

1175
00:46:16,192 --> 00:46:18,893
but my friends in college would
never do shit like this ever.

1176
00:46:18,895 --> 00:46:20,061
Your friends in college, dude?

1177
00:46:20,063 --> 00:46:21,929
Your friends in college
are a bunch of fucking pussies

1178
00:46:21,931 --> 00:46:23,364
that just swipe
daddy's credit card

1179
00:46:23,366 --> 00:46:24,565
whenever something goes wrong.

1180
00:46:24,567 --> 00:46:25,933
That fixes everything.

1181
00:46:25,935 --> 00:46:27,701
Dude, you don't even know them.
Shut the fuck up.

1182
00:46:27,703 --> 00:46:29,235
Yeah, you're right,
I don't know them,

1183
00:46:29,237 --> 00:46:31,572
because you
haven't invited me up once.

1184
00:46:31,574 --> 00:46:33,907
Is that honestly
a fucking surprise?

1185
00:46:33,909 --> 00:46:35,241
If I invited you up,

1186
00:46:35,243 --> 00:46:36,576
you would just blackout
at every party

1187
00:46:36,578 --> 00:46:38,378
and make a fucking idiot
out of yourself

1188
00:46:38,380 --> 00:46:39,512
'cause you're fucking drunk,
dude.

1189
00:46:39,514 --> 00:46:41,250
You'd be a fucking
embarrassment.

1190
00:46:42,552 --> 00:46:43,653
[Nate sighs]

1191
00:46:49,592 --> 00:46:51,592
Wow.

1192
00:46:51,594 --> 00:46:53,230
Okay.

1193
00:46:55,598 --> 00:46:57,300
[sighs]

1194
00:47:00,703 --> 00:47:03,139
All right, I didn't mean that.
I just...

1195
00:47:05,674 --> 00:47:07,308
I don't know, man, it's...

1196
00:47:07,310 --> 00:47:09,279
I just have a lot
of adrenaline in me.

1197
00:47:11,279 --> 00:47:12,448
It's cool, then.

1198
00:47:14,549 --> 00:47:16,282
Look man, let's just...

1199
00:47:16,284 --> 00:47:17,217
Fuck it, dude,

1200
00:47:17,219 --> 00:47:19,219
let's just go get
some weed for the wedding

1201
00:47:19,221 --> 00:47:20,456
and go like we planned,
all right?

1202
00:47:21,424 --> 00:47:22,523
I promise we can get so high

1203
00:47:22,525 --> 00:47:25,291
that we will forget
we even had this conversation.

1204
00:47:25,293 --> 00:47:26,395
Okay?

1205
00:47:28,563 --> 00:47:31,398
- Okay?
- Okay, dude.

1206
00:47:31,400 --> 00:47:32,368
Fuck.

1207
00:47:33,703 --> 00:47:36,540
Uh, where are we gonna get weed
at this point?

1208
00:47:38,741 --> 00:47:41,275
I don't know, uh...

1209
00:47:41,277 --> 00:47:43,580
As of right, now I can
only think of one person, but...

1210
00:47:44,679 --> 00:47:46,582
I don't think
you're gonna like it.

1211
00:47:59,594 --> 00:48:01,330
What the fuck do you want?

1212
00:48:06,402 --> 00:48:08,402
Don't touch my cat,
he's diseased.

1213
00:48:08,404 --> 00:48:09,469
Oh, what?

1214
00:48:09,471 --> 00:48:10,371
[cat meows]

1215
00:48:10,373 --> 00:48:12,373
Okay, look.

1216
00:48:12,375 --> 00:48:14,677
I'm all out
of my normal weed, but...

1217
00:48:15,578 --> 00:48:17,645
I have these edibles.

1218
00:48:17,647 --> 00:48:19,480
Thirty-five bucks a pop.

1219
00:48:19,482 --> 00:48:20,748
[chuckles]

1220
00:48:20,750 --> 00:48:22,516
Tommy, 35 bucks a pop,

1221
00:48:22,518 --> 00:48:24,384
man, that seems
like kind of a rip-off.

1222
00:48:24,386 --> 00:48:25,552
Yeah?

1223
00:48:25,554 --> 00:48:27,490
How about you pay me or get out?

1224
00:48:30,025 --> 00:48:32,261
Yeah, we'll just pay.
You got... You got this?

1225
00:48:33,496 --> 00:48:35,795
Yeah, do you take Venmo?

1226
00:48:35,797 --> 00:48:37,331
What the fuck is a Venmo?

1227
00:48:37,333 --> 00:48:38,465
Venmo is an app

1228
00:48:38,467 --> 00:48:39,833
where you can send payments
to people on your phone.

1229
00:48:39,835 --> 00:48:41,467
No.

1230
00:48:41,469 --> 00:48:44,471
No, no phones, no apps.

1231
00:48:44,473 --> 00:48:45,808
I need cash.

1232
00:48:46,842 --> 00:48:48,509
I don't... I don't have any cash.

1233
00:48:48,511 --> 00:48:49,809
Do you have cash?

1234
00:48:49,811 --> 00:48:51,512
- Yeah, I got cash.
- Okay.

1235
00:48:51,514 --> 00:48:52,846
[Nate] I'll just Venmo you
my half.

1236
00:48:52,848 --> 00:48:53,846
[Alec] Cool.

1237
00:48:53,848 --> 00:48:55,782
Uh, you should really consider
getting Venmo.

1238
00:48:55,784 --> 00:48:57,384
It's, like, super convenient.

1239
00:48:57,386 --> 00:48:59,386
Forget about the fucking Venmo.

1240
00:48:59,388 --> 00:49:00,389
Jesus.

1241
00:49:01,089 --> 00:49:02,391
Seventy dollars.

1242
00:49:10,799 --> 00:49:14,335
Oh, and don't eat
the whole thing at once.

1243
00:49:14,337 --> 00:49:16,637
I don't care how high
you think your tolerance is,

1244
00:49:16,639 --> 00:49:18,404
eat half, see how you feel.

1245
00:49:18,406 --> 00:49:19,706
Definitely.
Thank you so much. Let's go.

1246
00:49:19,708 --> 00:49:20,641
No, no, hold on.

1247
00:49:20,643 --> 00:49:23,811
While we're here,
I think I have something

1248
00:49:23,813 --> 00:49:26,079
that you could be
interested in.

1249
00:49:26,081 --> 00:49:27,449
What?

1250
00:49:31,386 --> 00:49:32,721
What the fuck is that?

1251
00:49:33,621 --> 00:49:34,688
It's cocaine.

1252
00:49:34,690 --> 00:49:37,123
What the hell are you doing
with a bag of coke?

1253
00:49:37,125 --> 00:49:38,692
I just figured I owe you
some money

1254
00:49:38,694 --> 00:49:41,795
and I can use this to pay off
some of that money.

1255
00:49:41,797 --> 00:49:44,098
I don't know
how much it's worth,

1256
00:49:44,100 --> 00:49:46,433
but I'm sure you have a scale
or something that you could...

1257
00:49:46,435 --> 00:49:47,500
What are you, nuts?

1258
00:49:47,502 --> 00:49:49,838
What do you think I am,
some kind of drug dealer?

1259
00:49:54,377 --> 00:49:55,612
Yeah.

1260
00:49:56,545 --> 00:49:59,445
No, I work
at a stationery store,

1261
00:49:59,447 --> 00:50:02,483
I sell weed to my friends
because I have a med card,

1262
00:50:02,485 --> 00:50:04,421
but I'm not a drug dealer.

1263
00:50:05,821 --> 00:50:07,721
Oh, shit.

1264
00:50:07,723 --> 00:50:08,989
I hate to break it to you, pal,

1265
00:50:08,991 --> 00:50:11,592
but you're gonna have to pay me
back the old-fashioned way.

1266
00:50:11,594 --> 00:50:13,763
[Alec] Tommy, look at me,
man, come on.

1267
00:50:15,130 --> 00:50:16,764
We've been neighbors
for a long time now,

1268
00:50:16,766 --> 00:50:18,165
and I know you're upset
about the car thing,

1269
00:50:18,167 --> 00:50:19,532
I'm upset
about the car thing.

1270
00:50:19,534 --> 00:50:20,867
It was a total accident.

1271
00:50:20,869 --> 00:50:22,770
But despite
all our differences, man,

1272
00:50:22,772 --> 00:50:24,837
I've always considered us
to be really good friends.

1273
00:50:24,839 --> 00:50:26,940
- I mean, we...
- Shut the fuck up, Alec.

1274
00:50:26,942 --> 00:50:30,511
You're gonna pay me back
in cash tomorrow,

1275
00:50:30,513 --> 00:50:32,145
not in fucking Venmo

1276
00:50:32,147 --> 00:50:34,181
and not in fucking cocaine.

1277
00:50:34,183 --> 00:50:37,418
In cash, or I'm gonna walk over
to your mother's house

1278
00:50:37,420 --> 00:50:39,485
and I'm going to tell her
exactly what happened.

1279
00:50:39,487 --> 00:50:41,457
That's it, end of story.
You understand?

1280
00:50:43,426 --> 00:50:44,757
- Yeah.
- [Tommy] Good.

1281
00:50:44,759 --> 00:50:46,927
Now get the fuck out.

1282
00:50:46,929 --> 00:50:48,598
Fuck.

1283
00:50:50,900 --> 00:50:53,800
See you bright and early
tomorrow, Alec.

1284
00:50:53,802 --> 00:50:55,505
Bright and early, baby.

1285
00:50:56,438 --> 00:50:58,572
Fucking stoners.

1286
00:50:58,574 --> 00:51:01,978
[rock music]

1287
00:51:17,625 --> 00:51:19,561
[snores]

1288
00:51:51,560 --> 00:51:53,226
[Nate] It's like...
How do they make these?

1289
00:51:53,228 --> 00:51:56,563
Do they grind up, like, bud
and, like, put it in the dough?

1290
00:51:56,565 --> 00:51:58,935
Or is there, like, pre-made,
like, cookie dough, like...

1291
00:52:00,869 --> 00:52:02,235
Did you just
eat the whole thing?

1292
00:52:02,237 --> 00:52:03,270
Yeah.

1293
00:52:03,272 --> 00:52:05,605
Dude, you're an idiot.
He said to only need half.

1294
00:52:05,607 --> 00:52:06,541
Tommy is a fucking retard, dude.

1295
00:52:06,543 --> 00:52:08,241
He doesn't know
what he's talking about.

1296
00:52:08,243 --> 00:52:10,944
Just eat the fucking cookie.
Stop being a pussy.

1297
00:52:10,946 --> 00:52:11,945
[sighs]

1298
00:52:11,947 --> 00:52:12,880
Eat it.

1299
00:52:12,882 --> 00:52:14,280
I mean, I end up
in a fucking ambulance,

1300
00:52:14,282 --> 00:52:15,648
you're gonna be
taking care of me all day.

1301
00:52:15,650 --> 00:52:17,784
- I can't wait.
- All right, fine.

1302
00:52:17,786 --> 00:52:18,951
Fine.

1303
00:52:18,953 --> 00:52:20,087
This will be
really fucking fun for you.

1304
00:52:20,089 --> 00:52:21,755
Are you going to do it
or just keep talking about it?

1305
00:52:21,757 --> 00:52:23,525
I'll do it. Fuck.

1306
00:52:24,527 --> 00:52:25,826
[Alec laughs]

1307
00:52:25,828 --> 00:52:27,927
[mumbling] We're so stupid, bro.

1308
00:52:27,929 --> 00:52:28,862
[mumbling] We're stupid people.

1309
00:52:28,864 --> 00:52:31,467
[laughs]

1310
00:52:32,034 --> 00:52:34,768
- That's great.
- This cookie tastes like shit.

1311
00:52:34,770 --> 00:52:36,538
I kind of like it.

1312
00:52:37,973 --> 00:52:39,005
All right, you good?

1313
00:52:39,007 --> 00:52:41,741
[exhales]

1314
00:52:41,743 --> 00:52:42,875
Yeah.

1315
00:52:42,877 --> 00:52:44,580
All right.

1316
00:52:46,714 --> 00:52:47,713
[sighs]

1317
00:52:47,715 --> 00:52:48,882
Let's do this shit.

1318
00:52:48,884 --> 00:52:50,616
Yeah.

1319
00:52:50,618 --> 00:52:54,556
[funky music playing]

1320
00:53:10,639 --> 00:53:12,038
We are here today to celebrate

1321
00:53:12,040 --> 00:53:14,775
something as special
as life itself.

1322
00:53:14,777 --> 00:53:18,311
The love between two people
can conquer any boundary

1323
00:53:18,313 --> 00:53:21,081
and overcome
every obstacle known to man,

1324
00:53:21,083 --> 00:53:22,616
including death.

1325
00:53:22,618 --> 00:53:24,750
[door creaking]

1326
00:53:24,752 --> 00:53:25,552
[Pastor] We've come together

1327
00:53:25,554 --> 00:53:28,621
at the invitation
of Kahji and Maria

1328
00:53:28,623 --> 00:53:31,627
to celebrate their uniting
in Christian love.

1329
00:53:33,127 --> 00:53:34,761
Look at that motherfucker.

1330
00:53:34,763 --> 00:53:35,661
It's Kahji, man.

1331
00:53:35,663 --> 00:53:36,762
[Alec] He looks good.

1332
00:53:36,764 --> 00:53:37,931
[Nate] Look at his wife.

1333
00:53:37,933 --> 00:53:39,699
[Alec] That's
what I was gonna say.

1334
00:53:39,701 --> 00:53:41,634
- [Nate] She's not bad.
- [Alec] She's a hottie.

1335
00:53:41,636 --> 00:53:43,670
Jesus said I come to them...

1336
00:53:43,672 --> 00:53:45,108
Dude, are you feeling it?

1337
00:53:45,975 --> 00:53:47,710
Yeah, a little, like...

1338
00:53:48,610 --> 00:53:49,543
Like I'm high, you know,

1339
00:53:49,545 --> 00:53:51,110
but, like, at a really,
like, chill level,

1340
00:53:51,112 --> 00:53:52,346
you know what I mean?

1341
00:53:52,348 --> 00:53:53,813
Yeah, dude, me too.

1342
00:53:53,815 --> 00:53:56,049
Oh, yeah.

1343
00:53:56,051 --> 00:53:58,117
[sighs]

1344
00:53:58,119 --> 00:53:59,822
[Pastor] ...that we might have
this life.

1345
00:54:03,859 --> 00:54:05,828
[sighing]

1346
00:54:23,078 --> 00:54:24,411
Fuck.

1347
00:54:24,413 --> 00:54:26,380
- [groans]
- What dude, what happened?

1348
00:54:26,382 --> 00:54:27,748
[sighs]

1349
00:54:27,750 --> 00:54:28,985
What happened?

1350
00:54:30,985 --> 00:54:33,686
Why the fuck did we eat
the whole thing?

1351
00:54:33,688 --> 00:54:35,822
That was fucking stupid.

1352
00:54:35,824 --> 00:54:36,956
[Alec] Dude,
you need to calm down.

1353
00:54:36,958 --> 00:54:39,094
You look like you're about
to turn into a fucking Hulk.

1354
00:54:39,862 --> 00:54:41,994
Fuck.

1355
00:54:41,996 --> 00:54:43,396
Are you freaking out?

1356
00:54:43,398 --> 00:54:44,697
Your eyes are red as fuck.

1357
00:54:44,699 --> 00:54:46,099
No, they are not, dude.

1358
00:54:46,101 --> 00:54:47,166
Yes they are.

1359
00:54:47,168 --> 00:54:48,735
- Really?
- Yeah.

1360
00:54:48,737 --> 00:54:50,936
Oh, shit, dude so are yours.

1361
00:54:50,938 --> 00:54:51,904
Yeah, no shit.

1362
00:54:51,906 --> 00:54:53,005
These people will only take
one look at us

1363
00:54:53,007 --> 00:54:55,976
to know we are both
high off our fucking asses, man.

1364
00:54:55,978 --> 00:54:56,911
Shh!

1365
00:54:56,913 --> 00:54:57,844
[Pastor] Kahji and Maria
are here publicly

1366
00:54:57,846 --> 00:55:00,413
to declare
that because of Jesus Christ...

1367
00:55:00,415 --> 00:55:02,215
Did that really just happen?

1368
00:55:02,217 --> 00:55:04,750
Dude, that old lady is fierce.

1369
00:55:04,752 --> 00:55:05,786
[exhales]

1370
00:55:05,788 --> 00:55:08,721
[Pastor speaking indistinctly
in the background]

1371
00:55:08,723 --> 00:55:09,891
[exhales]

1372
00:55:12,728 --> 00:55:15,231
We should not be this fucked up
in a church, man.

1373
00:55:16,098 --> 00:55:17,864
Since when have you given a fuck
about religion, dude?

1374
00:55:17,866 --> 00:55:19,766
God gave us an apple, man,

1375
00:55:19,768 --> 00:55:20,933
and it represented temptation

1376
00:55:20,935 --> 00:55:22,835
and He said, "Don't touch it."

1377
00:55:22,837 --> 00:55:23,936
He said, "Don't touch it."

1378
00:55:23,938 --> 00:55:25,038
What apple?

1379
00:55:25,040 --> 00:55:26,440
It's like the apple of Eden,
man.

1380
00:55:26,442 --> 00:55:27,974
You're not supposed to...

1381
00:55:27,976 --> 00:55:29,041
touch the cookie.

1382
00:55:29,043 --> 00:55:29,976
Okay?

1383
00:55:29,978 --> 00:55:30,978
Well, now you are talking
about the cookie.

1384
00:55:30,980 --> 00:55:33,913
The cookie and the apple,
it's the same shit.

1385
00:55:33,915 --> 00:55:34,816
[whispering] Excuse me.

1386
00:55:35,851 --> 00:55:38,985
This is the most
important day in their lives.

1387
00:55:38,987 --> 00:55:40,920
Would you please try
to keep it down?

1388
00:55:40,922 --> 00:55:42,989
Sorry, it's over.

1389
00:55:42,991 --> 00:55:45,058
[Nate] It's over.

1390
00:55:45,060 --> 00:55:46,262
[Pastor] ...and one
for each other.

1391
00:55:47,462 --> 00:55:48,462
Okay.

1392
00:55:48,464 --> 00:55:50,063
[sighs]

1393
00:55:50,065 --> 00:55:51,764
I'm okay.

1394
00:55:51,766 --> 00:55:53,500
I'm okay.
I'm not that high.

1395
00:55:53,502 --> 00:55:54,768
I'm okay.

1396
00:55:54,770 --> 00:55:56,168
I'm just gonna be okay
from now on.

1397
00:55:56,170 --> 00:55:58,105
[Nate] I'm just gonna be cool.

1398
00:55:58,107 --> 00:55:59,676
Oh, shit, dude.

1399
00:56:01,009 --> 00:56:04,177
[Alec] He's looking
right fucking at you, dude.

1400
00:56:04,179 --> 00:56:07,146
It's like He's piercing
your soul with His gaze

1401
00:56:07,148 --> 00:56:08,215
and He's, like, opening
His hands

1402
00:56:08,217 --> 00:56:10,016
like He's, like,

1403
00:56:10,018 --> 00:56:12,085
"I know what you did.

1404
00:56:12,087 --> 00:56:13,820
I know that you're high."

1405
00:56:13,822 --> 00:56:14,688
This is so weird.

1406
00:56:14,690 --> 00:56:16,523
- He fucking knows.
- Stop, dude, okay?

1407
00:56:16,525 --> 00:56:18,125
Don't touch me,
don't touch me, don't touch me.

1408
00:56:18,127 --> 00:56:19,259
Okay?

1409
00:56:19,261 --> 00:56:22,862
...your wife, your partner
in life and one true love...

1410
00:56:22,864 --> 00:56:25,868
But He knows.
Just know that He knows.

1411
00:56:26,969 --> 00:56:29,268
[whispering] I think those boys
are both stoned.

1412
00:56:29,270 --> 00:56:31,237
[Pastor] Good times and the bad,

1413
00:56:31,239 --> 00:56:32,942
through sickness and in health,

1414
00:56:33,509 --> 00:56:35,712
for as long
as you both shall live?

1415
00:56:37,946 --> 00:56:38,844
I do.

1416
00:56:38,846 --> 00:56:39,982
[both chuckle]

1417
00:56:41,049 --> 00:56:42,014
- [Pastor] Maria?
- [whispering] Put them in, bro.

1418
00:56:42,016 --> 00:56:43,116
Put them in.

1419
00:56:43,118 --> 00:56:44,851
Can you do it for me?
I'm really bad at eye drops.

1420
00:56:44,853 --> 00:56:46,219
What are you, a fucking child?

1421
00:56:46,221 --> 00:56:48,123
Just give me this fuck
and let me do it.

1422
00:56:49,123 --> 00:56:51,525
...respect and honor him,

1423
00:56:51,527 --> 00:56:54,027
laugh with him,
cry with him.

1424
00:56:54,029 --> 00:56:55,561
All right, just do it.
Just do it.

1425
00:56:55,563 --> 00:56:56,663
I'm, like, fucking...
Oh, okay.

1426
00:56:56,665 --> 00:56:58,230
Listen, dude, you gotta keep
your fucking eye open.

1427
00:56:58,232 --> 00:56:59,132
They are open.
Just fucking do it.

1428
00:56:59,134 --> 00:56:59,833
All right.

1429
00:56:59,835 --> 00:57:02,034
Through sickness and in health

1430
00:57:02,036 --> 00:57:04,170
for as long
as you both shall live?

1431
00:57:04,172 --> 00:57:05,337
I do.

1432
00:57:05,339 --> 00:57:07,940
[Pastor] Please
present the rings.

1433
00:57:07,942 --> 00:57:09,342
- [sighs]
- [groans]

1434
00:57:09,344 --> 00:57:10,944
Okay.

1435
00:57:10,946 --> 00:57:13,145
And now by the power vested
in me, I pronounce you...

1436
00:57:13,147 --> 00:57:14,181
[Nate whispering]
Here's the kiss.

1437
00:57:14,183 --> 00:57:16,550
- [Pastor] ...husband and wife.
- Oh, shit, dude.

1438
00:57:16,552 --> 00:57:18,018
[Alec] Oh, shit.

1439
00:57:18,020 --> 00:57:20,353
[applause]

1440
00:57:20,355 --> 00:57:22,255
Oh, fucking finally, dude.

1441
00:57:22,257 --> 00:57:23,259
[cheering]

1442
00:57:24,826 --> 00:57:26,893
[applause]

1443
00:57:26,895 --> 00:57:27,996
Yeah!

1444
00:57:28,596 --> 00:57:29,329
- Whoo!
- Kahji.

1445
00:57:29,331 --> 00:57:30,230
Get it.

1446
00:57:30,232 --> 00:57:32,168
- [Nate cheering]
- Yeah!

1447
00:57:34,837 --> 00:57:35,835
[chuckles]

1448
00:57:35,837 --> 00:57:36,969
Yes.

1449
00:57:36,971 --> 00:57:38,904
Congratulations.

1450
00:57:38,906 --> 00:57:42,344
[jazz music]

1451
00:57:45,848 --> 00:57:47,382
[indistinct chatter]

1452
00:57:50,252 --> 00:57:52,054
Oh.

1453
00:57:52,855 --> 00:57:54,186
Look at those...

1454
00:57:54,188 --> 00:57:55,190
Dude, there he is.

1455
00:57:56,125 --> 00:57:58,257
[Alec] He is such a geek,
dude, I love it.

1456
00:57:58,259 --> 00:57:59,625
Let's just go say hi
and then we'll bounce.

1457
00:57:59,627 --> 00:58:01,027
Oh, time out, dude.

1458
00:58:01,029 --> 00:58:03,063
It's a bar.

1459
00:58:03,065 --> 00:58:03,963
All right,
but you do the talking,

1460
00:58:03,965 --> 00:58:05,331
'cause I'm still,
like, tripping balls.

1461
00:58:05,333 --> 00:58:06,201
Fair enough.

1462
00:58:07,069 --> 00:58:08,067
No one's dancing.

1463
00:58:08,069 --> 00:58:09,936
You know what I'm saying?

1464
00:58:09,938 --> 00:58:11,938
You know, one of these.

1465
00:58:11,940 --> 00:58:12,873
I got moves.

1466
00:58:12,875 --> 00:58:14,107
You don't even know it,
dude, but I do.

1467
00:58:14,109 --> 00:58:15,942
- I can dance better than you.
- You've never seen me dance.

1468
00:58:15,944 --> 00:58:17,344
I've seen you dance.
You suck at dancing.

1469
00:58:17,346 --> 00:58:19,279
- [Nate] Hey, what's up, man?
- Hey, guys.

1470
00:58:19,281 --> 00:58:20,380
Can we get two Jack and cokes?

1471
00:58:20,382 --> 00:58:21,284
[Andy] Sure.

1472
00:58:22,217 --> 00:58:22,983
Hey, could you actually...

1473
00:58:22,985 --> 00:58:24,217
Can you make them
doubles, please?

1474
00:58:24,219 --> 00:58:25,384
Sure, coming right up.

1475
00:58:25,386 --> 00:58:26,920
Appreciate it.

1476
00:58:26,922 --> 00:58:27,887
Wow, big man.

1477
00:58:27,889 --> 00:58:28,788
[sighs]

1478
00:58:28,790 --> 00:58:29,556
If I drink more,
I'll get less stoned.

1479
00:58:29,558 --> 00:58:31,159
Yeah, I know.
I like your style.

1480
00:58:32,627 --> 00:58:35,094
Thanks, man.
How much are they?

1481
00:58:35,096 --> 00:58:37,399
Oh, no, it's an open bar.
All the drinks are free.

1482
00:58:38,199 --> 00:58:39,465
Hold on, time out.

1483
00:58:39,467 --> 00:58:41,000
So you're telling me that we can
have as many of these as we like

1484
00:58:41,002 --> 00:58:41,902
and they're free?

1485
00:58:41,904 --> 00:58:43,406
Yeah, that's correct.

1486
00:58:44,339 --> 00:58:46,005
Wow.
What's your name?

1487
00:58:46,007 --> 00:58:47,007
- Andy.
- [Alec] Andy, fuck yes, dude.

1488
00:58:47,009 --> 00:58:47,907
[Alec] Cheers to you.

1489
00:58:47,909 --> 00:58:48,641
Cheers, man.

1490
00:58:48,643 --> 00:58:49,846
- [Andy] Yeah.
- Thanks.

1491
00:58:50,978 --> 00:58:52,679
Hmm.

1492
00:58:52,681 --> 00:58:54,116
No, you're not.

1493
00:58:58,386 --> 00:59:00,889
[Nate] Wow. Let's go again.

1494
00:59:04,058 --> 00:59:05,125
- Whoa!
- [burps]

1495
00:59:05,127 --> 00:59:06,192
I feel way less stoned.

1496
00:59:06,194 --> 00:59:07,259
- Uh-huh.
- Feel way less stoned.

1497
00:59:07,261 --> 00:59:08,360
You didn't even look
stoned before.

1498
00:59:08,362 --> 00:59:09,331
Sir, does he look high to you?

1499
00:59:13,368 --> 00:59:14,467
Andy, fucking Andy.

1500
00:59:14,469 --> 00:59:15,404
[Nate] Thanks, Andy.

1501
00:59:17,172 --> 00:59:18,270
- Kahji.
- Okay, cool.

1502
00:59:18,272 --> 00:59:19,405
Let's go fuck with him.

1503
00:59:19,407 --> 00:59:21,440
- There he is.
- Oh.

1504
00:59:21,442 --> 00:59:22,976
[Alec] Hey there.

1505
00:59:22,978 --> 00:59:24,476
Hey there. How...

1506
00:59:24,478 --> 00:59:25,645
Oh, good to see you.

1507
00:59:25,647 --> 00:59:29,014
Remember me from high school?
I was buddies with Kahji.

1508
00:59:29,016 --> 00:59:30,349
You look great. You look great.

1509
00:59:30,351 --> 00:59:32,152
You did something new
with your hair.

1510
00:59:32,154 --> 00:59:34,154
I gotta say, I really like it.
I dig the flowers.

1511
00:59:34,156 --> 00:59:35,322
[Nate] Hey, Alec, we should go...

1512
00:59:35,324 --> 00:59:36,290
Let's go say hi to Kahji, man.

1513
00:59:36,292 --> 00:59:37,523
You know what?
I'll be there in a sec, man.

1514
00:59:37,525 --> 00:59:39,960
- You go on ahead, you know.
- Let's go say hi to Kahji, dude.

1515
00:59:39,962 --> 00:59:40,828
[Nate] He's the man of the hour.

1516
00:59:40,830 --> 00:59:41,695
[Alec] Okay,
you're pulling me away.

1517
00:59:41,697 --> 00:59:44,096
But we're grabbing a drink
later, okay?

1518
00:59:44,098 --> 00:59:45,465
All right,
I'm holding you to it.

1519
00:59:45,467 --> 00:59:47,199
Thank you for her flower.

1520
00:59:47,201 --> 00:59:48,701
I will take care of it.

1521
00:59:48,703 --> 00:59:51,270
I'll do anything you want me to.

1522
00:59:51,272 --> 00:59:54,040
Oh, someone call
the fire department.

1523
00:59:54,042 --> 00:59:54,708
[laughing]

1524
00:59:54,710 --> 00:59:57,177
Oh, you guys made it!

1525
00:59:57,179 --> 00:59:59,311
- Why not?
- Good to see you, man.

1526
00:59:59,313 --> 01:00:00,413
[Nate] Congratulations, man.

1527
01:00:00,415 --> 01:00:02,047
Thanks, dude.

1528
01:00:02,049 --> 01:00:04,351
I'm so stoked you guys are here.

1529
01:00:04,353 --> 01:00:06,418
Let me introduce you to my wife.

1530
01:00:06,420 --> 01:00:07,989
- Okay.
- [Nate] Let's do it.

1531
01:00:09,190 --> 01:00:11,056
- [laughing]
- Jesus.

1532
01:00:11,058 --> 01:00:15,094
Maria, these are the guys that
I've been telling you about.

1533
01:00:15,096 --> 01:00:16,730
Maria, it's so nice to meet you.
I'm Nate.

1534
01:00:16,732 --> 01:00:18,197
You know what?
We hug in this family.

1535
01:00:18,199 --> 01:00:20,000
I'm Alec. Pleasure.

1536
01:00:20,002 --> 01:00:21,067
[Alec] It's a pleasure.

1537
01:00:21,069 --> 01:00:22,369
I've heard so much about you.

1538
01:00:22,371 --> 01:00:25,105
- Yeah.
- [chuckles]

1539
01:00:25,107 --> 01:00:26,005
- Whoa.
- Wow, there you go...

1540
01:00:26,007 --> 01:00:26,940
Okay.

1541
01:00:26,942 --> 01:00:28,041
Right in middle
of a conversation, huh?

1542
01:00:28,043 --> 01:00:30,076
It's been nineteen long years,
I gotta capitalize.

1543
01:00:30,078 --> 01:00:31,344
Can't blame you there.

1544
01:00:31,346 --> 01:00:33,212
- He's very serious about it.
- Yeah, no kidding.

1545
01:00:33,214 --> 01:00:35,014
Well, I'm going to interrupt
the capitalization.

1546
01:00:35,016 --> 01:00:36,349
[Alec] You don't mind
if we borrow him for a second?

1547
01:00:36,351 --> 01:00:38,050
We got some catching up
to do, you know?

1548
01:00:38,052 --> 01:00:39,418
- Yeah, of course.
- [Alec] Yeah?

1549
01:00:39,420 --> 01:00:41,286
- Yeah, we'll be back soon.
- Okay.

1550
01:00:41,288 --> 01:00:42,755
- Oh!
- Holly shit.

1551
01:00:42,757 --> 01:00:44,324
- Damn.
- Am I hard? I think so.

1552
01:00:44,326 --> 01:00:45,125
[both chuckle]

1553
01:00:45,127 --> 01:00:46,259
Let's separate you two,
you know?

1554
01:00:46,261 --> 01:00:48,228
Yeah, till more starts
to happen, you know what I mean?

1555
01:00:48,230 --> 01:00:49,429
- It's heating up in here.
- Uh-huh.

1556
01:00:49,431 --> 01:00:51,530
Look at you, man, you're
doing pretty well for yourself.

1557
01:00:51,532 --> 01:00:52,766
Married man, huh?

1558
01:00:52,768 --> 01:00:54,768
Call me daddy.

1559
01:00:54,770 --> 01:00:55,567
What?

1560
01:00:55,569 --> 01:00:57,172
Big Daddy.

1561
01:00:58,072 --> 01:00:59,371
Andy, what's up man?

1562
01:00:59,373 --> 01:01:01,141
Gentlemen.

1563
01:01:01,143 --> 01:01:03,076
Can we get three shots
of tequila, please?

1564
01:01:03,078 --> 01:01:03,976
Absolutely.

1565
01:01:03,978 --> 01:01:06,478
That's right, baby.
Hey, listen, uh...

1566
01:01:06,480 --> 01:01:08,348
So I know that you were, like,
putting on a show

1567
01:01:08,350 --> 01:01:09,782
for your family and everything,

1568
01:01:09,784 --> 01:01:10,918
but you can level with us.

1569
01:01:10,920 --> 01:01:13,122
That really... that wasn't really
your first kiss, was it?

1570
01:01:14,089 --> 01:01:15,554
Yeah.

1571
01:01:15,556 --> 01:01:16,790
What?

1572
01:01:16,792 --> 01:01:18,525
Told you man, this guy's legit.

1573
01:01:18,527 --> 01:01:20,793
[Alec] Yeah, what a legend.
Let's do this.

1574
01:01:20,795 --> 01:01:22,529
Thanks, dawgs, I'm chilling.

1575
01:01:22,531 --> 01:01:24,130
- No.
- Come on, man.

1576
01:01:24,132 --> 01:01:25,532
You... It's
your fucking wedding, dude.

1577
01:01:25,534 --> 01:01:27,567
- Take a shot with us.
- It won't kill you.

1578
01:01:27,569 --> 01:01:28,603
- Cheers.
- Cheers.

1579
01:01:30,337 --> 01:01:32,538
Whoa! Ooh!

1580
01:01:32,540 --> 01:01:33,373
[groans]

1581
01:01:33,375 --> 01:01:34,174
Yeah, that'll loosen you up,
right?

1582
01:01:34,176 --> 01:01:36,576
You're gonna need it
for tonight.

1583
01:01:36,578 --> 01:01:38,078
Are you nervous?

1584
01:01:38,080 --> 01:01:39,281
About what?

1585
01:01:40,281 --> 01:01:41,346
Can we get just three more,
Andy?

1586
01:01:41,348 --> 01:01:43,148
- [Andy] Sure.
- Thank you.

1587
01:01:43,150 --> 01:01:45,217
You know, like, it's gonna be
your first time,

1588
01:01:45,219 --> 01:01:47,253
it's going to be her first time.

1589
01:01:47,255 --> 01:01:48,822
[Nate] Seems like a lot
of pressure, right?

1590
01:01:48,824 --> 01:01:51,260
Well, technically
it's not her first time, so...

1591
01:01:52,393 --> 01:01:54,159
Wait, what do you mean?

1592
01:01:54,161 --> 01:01:56,329
Oh, boys, shake this, all right?
Here we go.

1593
01:01:56,331 --> 01:01:57,364
Hold on, time out.

1594
01:01:57,366 --> 01:01:59,235
What do you mean it's not
gonna be her first time?

1595
01:02:00,268 --> 01:02:03,302
Well, she had a boyfriend
before me when she was younger,

1596
01:02:03,304 --> 01:02:04,871
but, you know,
she joined the church

1597
01:02:04,873 --> 01:02:07,139
and she reclaimed
her virginity, so...

1598
01:02:07,141 --> 01:02:08,277
Yeah, so it's all good now.

1599
01:02:09,444 --> 01:02:11,177
Reclaimed her virginity?

1600
01:02:11,179 --> 01:02:13,145
Alec, Alec,
let's take these, okay?

1601
01:02:13,147 --> 01:02:14,246
Round two, here we go.

1602
01:02:14,248 --> 01:02:16,549
Here we go.
Round two, baby.

1603
01:02:16,551 --> 01:02:18,186
- Let's do it.
- [Nate] To Kahji.

1604
01:02:20,855 --> 01:02:22,323
[Nate groans]

1605
01:02:23,458 --> 01:02:26,893
Dude, so she's had sex before
and you haven't?

1606
01:02:26,895 --> 01:02:58,218
Alec, dude, forget about it.

1607
01:02:58,220 --> 01:02:59,921
She reclaimed her virginity,
it's fine, okay?

1608
01:02:59,923 --> 01:03:01,522
No, no, no,
it's fine, it's fine.

1609
01:03:01,524 --> 01:03:02,323
I'm just saying, dude,

1610
01:03:02,325 --> 01:03:03,223
like, I don't mean
to freak you out,

1611
01:03:03,225 --> 01:03:03,957
but it's gonna be weird
when she knows

1612
01:03:03,959 --> 01:03:06,894
what she's doing and you don't.

1613
01:03:06,896 --> 01:03:07,696
You know what I'm saying?

1614
01:03:08,664 --> 01:03:12,533
Look, we really love each other,
okay?

1615
01:03:12,535 --> 01:03:14,504
So it's gonna be all right.

1616
01:03:16,238 --> 01:03:18,506
Look, my... my family
is calling me for photos.

1617
01:03:18,508 --> 01:03:20,006
- [Kahji] I gotta go.
- Go for it, man.

1618
01:03:20,008 --> 01:03:21,174
Go kill them out there, okay?

1619
01:03:21,176 --> 01:03:22,245
[Nate] You put on a good show
out there, right, buddy?

1620
01:03:25,682 --> 01:03:27,247
What are you being a fucking
asshole to him for, man?

1621
01:03:27,249 --> 01:03:28,116
Whoa.

1622
01:03:28,118 --> 01:03:29,049
You're fucking freaking him out,
dude.

1623
01:03:29,051 --> 01:03:29,716
No, I'm not being
a fucking asshole, dude.

1624
01:03:29,718 --> 01:03:31,953
I just think it's bullshit.

1625
01:03:31,955 --> 01:03:33,888
[Alec] He got fucking swindled,
dude, all right?

1626
01:03:33,890 --> 01:03:35,223
Think about when they go
to bed later.

1627
01:03:35,225 --> 01:03:36,290
He gets in her pants

1628
01:03:36,292 --> 01:03:37,292
and finds out something
he doesn't like, you know?

1629
01:03:37,294 --> 01:03:40,694
Maybe she has like an abnormally
wide vagina or...

1630
01:03:40,696 --> 01:03:42,497
- What?
- I don't know, man.

1631
01:03:42,499 --> 01:03:44,232
Crazy shit happens
like that sometimes.

1632
01:03:44,234 --> 01:03:45,267
What are you talking about?

1633
01:03:45,269 --> 01:03:47,801
I mean, it's one thing
if they're both virgins,

1634
01:03:47,803 --> 01:03:49,604
but it's an entirely other thing

1635
01:03:49,606 --> 01:03:50,604
if she isn't and he is.

1636
01:03:50,606 --> 01:03:53,274
I mean, she's never
gonna fucking respect him.

1637
01:03:53,276 --> 01:03:55,008
She's never gonna respect him.

1638
01:03:55,010 --> 01:03:56,776
She's always gonna
look down on him, dude.

1639
01:03:56,778 --> 01:03:59,046
Girls fucking hate it
when, you know,

1640
01:03:59,048 --> 01:04:01,048
a guy doesn't know
what they're doing.

1641
01:04:01,050 --> 01:04:02,718
Poor little guy.

1642
01:04:04,988 --> 01:04:06,857
For you.

1643
01:04:07,624 --> 01:04:08,589
All right.

1644
01:04:08,591 --> 01:04:09,589
But after this, we're taking
a break, okay?

1645
01:04:09,591 --> 01:04:10,491
You know it.

1646
01:04:10,493 --> 01:04:11,292
I'm just trying
to get fucking wasted.

1647
01:04:11,294 --> 01:04:12,660
[Alec] Me too, dude.
Can't wait.

1648
01:04:12,662 --> 01:04:13,830
[Nate] All right, cheers.

1649
01:04:15,731 --> 01:04:16,999
Oh, fuck.

1650
01:04:19,568 --> 01:04:20,700
- Oh, shit.
- Whoa.

1651
01:04:20,702 --> 01:04:21,569
- Hide.
- [Alec] What, man?

1652
01:04:21,571 --> 01:04:22,636
[Nate] Fucking Ernie
just walked in.

1653
01:04:22,638 --> 01:04:23,437
Are you kidding me?

1654
01:04:23,439 --> 01:04:24,573
How the fuck
did he find us, man?

1655
01:04:24,575 --> 01:04:25,707
Dude, I don't know, maybe
because you've been posting

1656
01:04:25,709 --> 01:04:28,808
fucking a bunch of shit
on your gay little apps all day.

1657
01:04:28,810 --> 01:04:30,011
You left them
a social-media trail

1658
01:04:30,013 --> 01:04:32,683
of breadcrumbs, motherfucker.

1659
01:04:34,050 --> 01:04:36,017
Ernie, dude.
What's up, man?

1660
01:04:36,019 --> 01:04:37,951
Where the fuck is it, Alec?

1661
01:04:37,953 --> 01:04:38,819
Where's what, dude?

1662
01:04:38,821 --> 01:04:40,555
Look, don't fucking
jerk me around.

1663
01:04:40,557 --> 01:04:41,555
Where the fuck is it?

1664
01:04:41,557 --> 01:04:42,790
I'm not jerking anybody, dude.

1665
01:04:42,792 --> 01:04:44,091
I don't know
what you're talking about.

1666
01:04:44,093 --> 01:04:45,859
- Don't fuck with me, Alec.
- [glass shatters]

1667
01:04:45,861 --> 01:04:47,294
Where's my cocaine?
I know you stole it.

1668
01:04:47,296 --> 01:04:48,462
Fucking relax, dude.

1669
01:04:48,464 --> 01:04:51,332
[Ernie] Shut the fuck up, Nate,
you two-faced faggot.

1670
01:04:51,334 --> 01:04:53,700
Hey, man, relax,
we're at a fucking wedding.

1671
01:04:53,702 --> 01:04:55,002
Ernie.

1672
01:04:55,004 --> 01:04:57,638
Dude, what are you doing here?

1673
01:04:57,640 --> 01:05:00,040
These fucking guys
stole something from me,

1674
01:05:00,042 --> 01:05:01,107
and I'm here to take it back.

1675
01:05:01,109 --> 01:05:03,109
No, no, we didn't steal
anything.

1676
01:05:03,111 --> 01:05:05,812
Alec, I'm gonna give you
to the count of three

1677
01:05:05,814 --> 01:05:07,647
to give me my shit back.

1678
01:05:07,649 --> 01:05:09,316
And then I'm going
to beat the shit out of you

1679
01:05:09,318 --> 01:05:10,920
in front of all these people.

1680
01:05:13,122 --> 01:05:14,691
One...

1681
01:05:17,093 --> 01:05:17,991
Two...

1682
01:05:17,993 --> 01:05:19,062
Fine.

1683
01:05:27,336 --> 01:05:29,904
Dude, what's your problem?

1684
01:05:29,906 --> 01:05:31,372
[Ernie] What's my problem?

1685
01:05:31,374 --> 01:05:33,808
You're defending these guys.

1686
01:05:33,810 --> 01:05:35,712
They don't even
fucking like you.

1687
01:05:36,678 --> 01:05:38,111
The only reason they wanted
to come to your wedding,

1688
01:05:38,113 --> 01:05:40,013
because they thought
it would be funny

1689
01:05:40,015 --> 01:05:41,147
to watch you
have your first kiss

1690
01:05:41,149 --> 01:05:42,984
while they were on drugs.

1691
01:05:42,986 --> 01:05:44,688
That's what they told me.

1692
01:05:45,754 --> 01:05:47,156
They don't give a shit
about you.

1693
01:05:48,357 --> 01:05:49,089
They just wanted
to make fun of you

1694
01:05:49,091 --> 01:05:50,091
while they were fucking stoned.

1695
01:05:50,093 --> 01:05:52,729
Look at them,
they're fucking high as fuck.

1696
01:05:53,696 --> 01:05:55,766
If you guys wanted cocaine,
I would have given it to you.

1697
01:05:56,798 --> 01:05:58,366
I tried to get you laid,
for Christ's sake,

1698
01:05:58,368 --> 01:05:59,933
and this is how you repay me?

1699
01:05:59,935 --> 01:06:00,937
[Alec] Ernie.

1700
01:06:01,703 --> 01:06:04,705
Listen, man, I'm sorry, okay?

1701
01:06:04,707 --> 01:06:06,109
I was in a really bad place,
dude.

1702
01:06:07,977 --> 01:06:11,848
I know you guys think that I'm
some rich parentless douchebag.

1703
01:06:12,981 --> 01:06:16,850
Yeah, I might do a lot
of fucked-up shit to myself,

1704
01:06:16,852 --> 01:06:19,055
but at least I don't do
fucked up shit to other people.

1705
01:06:20,823 --> 01:06:23,189
You guys really hurt
my feelings today.

1706
01:06:23,191 --> 01:06:24,691
[weeps]

1707
01:06:24,693 --> 01:06:26,062
[Ernie] Congratulations, Kahji.

1708
01:06:27,664 --> 01:06:29,600
Fuck you, guys.

1709
01:06:31,434 --> 01:06:32,868
[exhales]

1710
01:06:38,707 --> 01:06:41,711
[pants]

1711
01:06:43,713 --> 01:06:46,015
Damn, that's fucked up.

1712
01:06:47,182 --> 01:06:48,783
Dude, everything that Ernie said

1713
01:06:48,785 --> 01:06:50,183
was total bullshit, man,
I swear to God.

1714
01:06:50,185 --> 01:06:52,886
Yo, the guy's a fucking
psychopath, all right?

1715
01:06:52,888 --> 01:06:54,055
He lies all the time.

1716
01:06:54,057 --> 01:06:55,055
We've been excited to come
for this for months, honestly.

1717
01:06:55,057 --> 01:06:56,890
Absolutely, man.
We've been talking about it.

1718
01:06:56,892 --> 01:06:57,793
- Yeah.
- Look.

1719
01:06:58,794 --> 01:07:01,764
Honestly, guys,
I don't really care anymore.

1720
01:07:02,932 --> 01:07:04,432
I'm not stupid.

1721
01:07:04,434 --> 01:07:06,000
I know you guys
never really liked

1722
01:07:06,002 --> 01:07:08,038
hanging out with me
in high school.

1723
01:07:09,205 --> 01:07:10,870
You only liked
hanging out with me

1724
01:07:10,872 --> 01:07:14,110
because I did your homework,
and you got As in algebra.

1725
01:07:15,877 --> 01:07:18,180
But I don't need you guys
anymore.

1726
01:07:18,981 --> 01:07:21,848
You know, I'm married now.

1727
01:07:21,850 --> 01:07:23,017
I only invited you here

1728
01:07:23,019 --> 01:07:24,951
because I wanted
to prove to you both

1729
01:07:24,953 --> 01:07:26,789
that I was worth something.

1730
01:07:27,923 --> 01:07:29,790
And I wanted to see
how much you guys have grown

1731
01:07:29,792 --> 01:07:31,728
since the last time
I saw you, but...

1732
01:07:32,461 --> 01:07:33,461
It looks
like nothing's changed,

1733
01:07:33,463 --> 01:07:35,495
you guys are still doing
the same stupid shit

1734
01:07:35,497 --> 01:07:36,763
you did in high school,

1735
01:07:36,765 --> 01:07:39,133
and that's great and all, but...

1736
01:07:39,135 --> 01:07:42,136
It's not something
I wanna be part of anymore.

1737
01:07:42,138 --> 01:07:44,741
Fuck, dude, we're really sorry
for ruining your wedding, man.

1738
01:07:46,274 --> 01:07:48,274
[Nate] She's a really
beautiful girl.

1739
01:07:48,276 --> 01:07:49,843
We're really happy for you,
honestly.

1740
01:07:49,845 --> 01:07:52,812
- Yeah, she is a fox, bro.
- A fox, buddy.

1741
01:07:52,814 --> 01:07:54,482
Yeah.

1742
01:07:54,484 --> 01:07:56,252
I'm gonna fuck her
really hard.

1743
01:07:58,854 --> 01:08:00,289
Wow.

1744
01:08:01,890 --> 01:08:04,959
Hey, I'd invite you both
back in, but...

1745
01:08:04,961 --> 01:08:07,026
I'm pretty sure
my entire family hates you.

1746
01:08:07,028 --> 01:08:08,895
- Oh, no, totally.
- Yeah, they...

1747
01:08:08,897 --> 01:08:09,964
- Makes sense.
- Totally.

1748
01:08:09,966 --> 01:08:12,803
- Yeah.
- It's good seeing you, guys.

1749
01:08:14,836 --> 01:08:17,037
[Alec] Yo, Kahji.

1750
01:08:17,039 --> 01:08:19,506
Good luck
on the other side, man.

1751
01:08:19,508 --> 01:08:21,241
Get big, baby.

1752
01:08:21,243 --> 01:08:22,776
[clicks his tongue]

1753
01:08:22,778 --> 01:08:24,046
[chuckles]

1754
01:08:28,850 --> 01:08:30,186
Okay.

1755
01:08:40,863 --> 01:08:42,165
[sighs]

1756
01:08:43,265 --> 01:08:45,966
Jesus fucking Christ, dude.

1757
01:08:45,968 --> 01:08:47,567
What a mess.

1758
01:08:47,569 --> 01:08:49,236
- Yeah.
- [sighs]

1759
01:08:49,238 --> 01:08:52,173
Hey, can you drive?
Are you good?

1760
01:08:52,175 --> 01:08:54,008
[Nate] No, dude,
I'm still pretty fucked up.

1761
01:08:54,010 --> 01:08:55,975
All right, here, give me
your keys and switch spots.

1762
01:08:55,977 --> 01:08:57,544
Let's just sit in here.

1763
01:08:57,546 --> 01:08:58,879
We'll listen to the radio,

1764
01:08:58,881 --> 01:09:00,848
we'll chill
and then we'll sober up.

1765
01:09:00,850 --> 01:09:02,018
[Nate] We'll leave
in a little bit.

1766
01:09:03,019 --> 01:09:03,984
[sighs]

1767
01:09:03,986 --> 01:09:05,019
All right.

1768
01:09:05,021 --> 01:09:05,986
[Nate] Okay.

1769
01:09:05,988 --> 01:09:06,890
Okay.

1770
01:09:11,827 --> 01:09:15,562
[music playing on the radio]

1771
01:09:15,564 --> 01:09:17,163
Hey, I don't mean
to sound like...

1772
01:09:17,165 --> 01:09:18,599
Like gay or dramatic
or anything,

1773
01:09:18,601 --> 01:09:20,835
but I'm sorry I was
a dick to you earlier, man.

1774
01:09:20,837 --> 01:09:22,169
[Nate] That wasn't chill at all.

1775
01:09:22,171 --> 01:09:24,371
Dude, don't worry about it, man.
I'm over it.

1776
01:09:24,373 --> 01:09:27,006
Honestly, I miss you a lot
when I'm at school.

1777
01:09:27,008 --> 01:09:28,975
[chuckles]
Aww.

1778
01:09:28,977 --> 01:09:32,212
No, I... Honest, I really do.
I just...

1779
01:09:32,214 --> 01:09:34,982
I think I didn't invite
you up because I was just...

1780
01:09:34,984 --> 01:09:35,983
I don't know,
I was just embarrassed

1781
01:09:35,985 --> 01:09:38,219
about the way things
were going for me there.

1782
01:09:38,221 --> 01:09:39,222
Why?

1783
01:09:40,355 --> 01:09:42,355
I don't know, The only
fraternity that gave me a bit

1784
01:09:42,357 --> 01:09:44,127
was, like, the lamest one
on campus.

1785
01:09:45,194 --> 01:09:46,260
Honestly, everyone
I hang out with

1786
01:09:46,262 --> 01:09:48,165
annoys the living shit
out of me.

1787
01:09:49,598 --> 01:09:51,064
Shit.

1788
01:09:51,066 --> 01:09:51,933
What about Machelle, man?

1789
01:09:51,935 --> 01:09:54,204
I thought that that
was going well.

1790
01:09:55,937 --> 01:09:57,203
[sighs]

1791
01:09:57,205 --> 01:09:59,340
No, it's...

1792
01:09:59,342 --> 01:10:00,974
It's not.

1793
01:10:00,976 --> 01:10:02,311
[chuckles]

1794
01:10:03,980 --> 01:10:05,182
Why not?

1795
01:10:06,615 --> 01:10:09,649
I don't know, It's just
she's not really my girlfriend.

1796
01:10:09,651 --> 01:10:12,221
We just... we're just kind of
like seeing each other, but...

1797
01:10:13,189 --> 01:10:15,292
I thought by now,
like, she would be, but...

1798
01:10:16,292 --> 01:10:18,024
I don't know, we just haven't
been able to, like, cross

1799
01:10:18,026 --> 01:10:22,161
a certain, like, barrier
or whatever you wanna call it.

1800
01:10:22,163 --> 01:10:24,133
Like you guys
just don't click or...?

1801
01:10:26,435 --> 01:10:27,934
[sighs]

1802
01:10:27,936 --> 01:10:28,635
I don't know, man.

1803
01:10:28,637 --> 01:10:31,404
For some reason whenever...

1804
01:10:31,406 --> 01:10:32,639
We...

1805
01:10:32,641 --> 01:10:36,109
Whenever we're gonna have sex,
it just...

1806
01:10:36,111 --> 01:10:38,946
doesn't happen, I just...

1807
01:10:38,948 --> 01:10:41,081
I don't know, I just...

1808
01:10:41,083 --> 01:10:43,420
I get really nervous and...

1809
01:10:45,954 --> 01:10:47,955
I mean, it's... it's not...
it doesn't matter, dude,

1810
01:10:47,957 --> 01:10:49,255
it's not worth talking about.

1811
01:10:49,257 --> 01:10:50,292
It's not a big deal.

1812
01:10:52,994 --> 01:10:55,865
So, are you saying you haven't...
you haven't lost it yet?

1813
01:10:58,133 --> 01:11:00,067
I don't know
if it's her or if it's me

1814
01:11:00,069 --> 01:11:02,105
or what the fuck it is, but...

1815
01:11:03,306 --> 01:11:05,238
It's like you said, dude.

1816
01:11:05,240 --> 01:11:08,011
Girls don't like guys who don't
know what they're doing.

1817
01:11:09,011 --> 01:11:10,210
[Nate chuckles]

1818
01:11:10,212 --> 01:11:13,216
I mean, fuck, fucking Kahji
is getting laid before I am.

1819
01:11:15,217 --> 01:11:16,483
That's fucking sad.

1820
01:11:16,485 --> 01:11:19,185
No, dude, I'm a fucking idiot,
all right?

1821
01:11:19,187 --> 01:11:20,957
I don't know
why I said that earlier.

1822
01:11:21,690 --> 01:11:22,823
The reason
you can't fuck Machelle

1823
01:11:22,825 --> 01:11:26,059
is probably because you just
don't like her that much,

1824
01:11:26,061 --> 01:11:27,193
and that's fucking normal.

1825
01:11:27,195 --> 01:11:28,429
That's the way it should be.

1826
01:11:28,431 --> 01:11:29,964
Plus, I'm sorry to say it,

1827
01:11:29,966 --> 01:11:31,935
but Machelle
is a psychotic bitch.

1828
01:11:32,702 --> 01:11:34,734
[laughs]

1829
01:11:34,736 --> 01:11:37,103
[Alec] You know?

1830
01:11:37,105 --> 01:11:39,238
But that little Kahji
was right, man.

1831
01:11:39,240 --> 01:11:42,977
I mean, he totally
changed my perspective.

1832
01:11:42,979 --> 01:11:44,377
In life, there's men,
and there's women

1833
01:11:44,379 --> 01:11:47,180
and we are the complete opposite
of one another.

1834
01:11:47,182 --> 01:11:48,282
But at the end of the day,
it's all about finding

1835
01:11:48,284 --> 01:11:49,216
that one that you have,

1836
01:11:49,218 --> 01:11:51,186
like, just a genuine connection
with, man.

1837
01:11:52,454 --> 01:11:55,322
I mean, and I'll admit it,
I haven't had sex in a while.

1838
01:11:55,324 --> 01:11:57,090
And I fucking mean it.

1839
01:11:57,092 --> 01:11:59,059
'Cause all the chicks I work
with that are beat as fuck

1840
01:11:59,061 --> 01:12:00,497
and they are the only ones
I have access to.

1841
01:12:01,529 --> 01:12:03,165
But it doesn't matter, dude.

1842
01:12:04,199 --> 01:12:05,264
You're fine, all right?

1843
01:12:05,266 --> 01:12:06,936
We'll find a Maria.
Just trust me.

1844
01:12:10,338 --> 01:12:12,141
Yeah, no, you're right.

1845
01:12:14,010 --> 01:12:15,442
And you know what, dude?
It's probably for the best.

1846
01:12:15,444 --> 01:12:17,379
I mean, Machelle gave me
chlamydia in high school.

1847
01:12:19,515 --> 01:12:21,247
Wait, what?

1848
01:12:21,249 --> 01:12:22,750
Yeah, dude, fucked up.

1849
01:12:22,752 --> 01:12:25,184
Wait a minute, you and Machelle
had sex in high school?

1850
01:12:25,186 --> 01:12:26,085
Yeah, man.

1851
01:12:26,087 --> 01:12:29,158
Oh, my God, dude, oh, fuck.

1852
01:12:30,392 --> 01:12:32,760
It still stings when I pee.

1853
01:12:32,762 --> 01:12:35,328
Oh, God.

1854
01:12:35,330 --> 01:12:37,197
Yeah, I don't know
what to do about it.

1855
01:12:37,199 --> 01:12:38,499
- I just kind of...
- See a doctor, dude.

1856
01:12:38,501 --> 01:12:40,267
Well, I just kind of pretend
it's gonna go away,

1857
01:12:40,269 --> 01:12:41,135
and it never does.

1858
01:12:41,137 --> 01:12:43,136
- It doesn't go away.
- It sucks, man.

1859
01:12:43,138 --> 01:12:45,104
It's scary. I'm scared.

1860
01:12:45,106 --> 01:12:46,508
[both laugh]

1861
01:12:50,111 --> 01:12:53,046
Dude, do you know
what you're gonna do

1862
01:12:53,048 --> 01:12:54,148
when you grow up?

1863
01:12:54,150 --> 01:12:56,250
Like, you know, when you get out
of college and shit,

1864
01:12:56,252 --> 01:12:57,384
you know what you're
gonna do with your life?

1865
01:12:57,386 --> 01:13:00,286
I don't fucking know.
I have no idea.

1866
01:13:00,288 --> 01:13:02,423
[Alec] Thank God.

1867
01:13:02,425 --> 01:13:04,825
I'm so sick of people telling me

1868
01:13:04,827 --> 01:13:06,393
they know exactly
what they're gonna do

1869
01:13:06,395 --> 01:13:08,429
and how they're going to do it.

1870
01:13:08,431 --> 01:13:11,230
You know? It scares me,
It scares the shit out of me.

1871
01:13:11,232 --> 01:13:14,367
I'm just a waiter who barely
graduated high school.

1872
01:13:14,369 --> 01:13:17,071
What can you do?
Where can you go from there?

1873
01:13:17,073 --> 01:13:18,505
Yeah, but if you want
to be successful,

1874
01:13:18,507 --> 01:13:20,276
it's good to start
at a humble place.

1875
01:13:21,409 --> 01:13:24,277
I mean, where the fuck
am I supposed to go, dude?

1876
01:13:24,279 --> 01:13:27,147
My dad grew up sleeping
in a fucking drawer

1877
01:13:27,149 --> 01:13:28,618
and I'm driving a Range Rover.

1878
01:13:30,186 --> 01:13:32,152
I mean, that's why my car
is trashed all the time,

1879
01:13:32,154 --> 01:13:34,388
it's because I hate it.

1880
01:13:34,390 --> 01:13:37,558
I fucking hate
how easy it was to get this.

1881
01:13:37,560 --> 01:13:40,327
I don't want a car this nice.
It's not good for my brain.

1882
01:13:40,329 --> 01:13:42,032
Jesus Christ.

1883
01:13:42,832 --> 01:13:45,299
Only in fucking America
do people complain

1884
01:13:45,301 --> 01:13:46,366
about being rich.

1885
01:13:46,368 --> 01:13:47,568
Well...

1886
01:13:47,570 --> 01:13:48,368
I mean, I'm not rich.

1887
01:13:48,370 --> 01:13:50,370
Dude, you're rich as fuck,
all right?

1888
01:13:50,372 --> 01:13:52,042
You're rich, just accept it.

1889
01:13:55,244 --> 01:13:57,243
All I'm saying is,

1890
01:13:57,245 --> 01:13:58,312
it's good
to earn things yourself

1891
01:13:58,314 --> 01:14:00,650
and not have everything
handed to you, you know?

1892
01:14:02,584 --> 01:14:05,452
The only way to get big

1893
01:14:05,454 --> 01:14:07,290
is to start small.

1894
01:14:09,124 --> 01:14:12,158
Dude, it doesn't matter
if you're rich or poor.

1895
01:14:12,160 --> 01:14:14,329
Everybody starts small.

1896
01:14:15,564 --> 01:14:17,197
[sighs]

1897
01:14:17,199 --> 01:14:18,468
Yeah.

1898
01:14:21,403 --> 01:14:23,338
[music stops]

1899
01:14:25,574 --> 01:14:26,639
[Nate] What the fuck
just happened?

1900
01:14:26,641 --> 01:14:28,207
[Alec] What is this?

1901
01:14:28,209 --> 01:14:29,876
What is this, dude?
Fix it.

1902
01:14:29,878 --> 01:14:30,611
Dude, fix it.

1903
01:14:30,613 --> 01:14:32,211
[motor chokes]

1904
01:14:32,213 --> 01:14:34,516
It's this shit fucking car,
dude.

1905
01:14:35,885 --> 01:14:37,050
Oh, I probably shouldn't
have played the radio

1906
01:14:37,052 --> 01:14:39,455
with the car turned off.
I think I drained the battery.

1907
01:14:40,355 --> 01:14:42,188
I gotta call
roadside service, I guess.

1908
01:14:42,190 --> 01:14:44,291
No, dude, that's not happening.

1909
01:14:44,293 --> 01:14:45,925
That's way too fucking long.

1910
01:14:45,927 --> 01:14:47,693
I'll be passed out
at that point.

1911
01:14:47,695 --> 01:14:49,595
I say we zonk out.

1912
01:14:49,597 --> 01:14:51,165
I'll set an alarm
for the morning.

1913
01:14:51,167 --> 01:14:52,435
We'll wake up
and take care of it.

1914
01:14:54,235 --> 01:14:55,902
[Nate sighs]

1915
01:14:55,904 --> 01:14:58,404
Goddammit, all right, fine.

1916
01:14:58,406 --> 01:15:00,506
All right.
Good night, man.

1917
01:15:00,508 --> 01:15:02,377
[Nate] Good night.

1918
01:15:04,613 --> 01:15:07,180
Despite all the bullshit, man,
today was

1919
01:15:07,182 --> 01:15:09,118
pretty fucking awesome.

1920
01:15:10,619 --> 01:15:12,555
Yeah, I'd say it was fun.

1921
01:15:15,557 --> 01:15:17,657
Good night.

1922
01:15:17,659 --> 01:15:19,328
Good night.

1923
01:15:31,272 --> 01:15:35,444
[alarm sets off]

1924
01:15:37,445 --> 01:15:39,548
[groans]

1925
01:15:42,418 --> 01:15:45,588
[alarm sound continues]

1926
01:15:49,425 --> 01:15:51,724
[sighs]

1927
01:15:51,726 --> 01:15:53,327
Alec.

1928
01:15:53,329 --> 01:15:54,460
[snores]

1929
01:15:54,462 --> 01:15:57,331
[Nate] Alec, wake up.

1930
01:15:57,333 --> 01:15:59,269
Turn the alarm off.

1931
01:16:02,738 --> 01:16:04,707
[alarm stops]

1932
01:16:07,243 --> 01:16:08,578
Holy shit.

1933
01:16:10,412 --> 01:16:12,315
What the fuck
are these people doing, man?

1934
01:16:12,981 --> 01:16:15,251
It's Sunday, dude.
They're going to church.

1935
01:16:16,985 --> 01:16:18,654
That makes sense.

1936
01:16:34,770 --> 01:16:36,303
[sighs]

1937
01:16:36,305 --> 01:16:37,507
All righty.

1938
01:16:43,745 --> 01:16:44,814
What?

1939
01:16:46,547 --> 01:16:49,452
Dude, how the fuck am I gonna
get three grand by today?

1940
01:16:53,422 --> 01:16:55,421
I don't know, is there anyone
at work that can help you out?

1941
01:16:55,423 --> 01:16:56,492
No.

1942
01:16:59,595 --> 01:17:02,765
No, man, my dad's gonna have
to pay for it.

1943
01:17:03,632 --> 01:17:05,568
He's gonna fucking kill me.

1944
01:17:06,568 --> 01:17:08,370
Shit.

1945
01:17:09,605 --> 01:17:11,470
I'm sorry, man.

1946
01:17:11,472 --> 01:17:12,774
[Alec] It's okay.

1947
01:17:15,410 --> 01:17:17,512
I guess there's a lot of things
I need to change.

1948
01:17:20,783 --> 01:17:22,515
Shit, if this isn't
a wake-up call,

1949
01:17:22,517 --> 01:17:24,253
I don't wanna to see
what will be.

1950
01:17:28,723 --> 01:17:30,090
Dude, if there's anyone I know

1951
01:17:30,092 --> 01:17:32,326
who can get out
of this situation, it's you.

1952
01:17:32,328 --> 01:17:34,664
You'll figure something out.
Don't worry about it, man.

1953
01:17:36,498 --> 01:17:38,064
You know what?
You're right, I will, man.

1954
01:17:38,066 --> 01:17:39,532
I will figure something out.
Thank you.

1955
01:17:39,534 --> 01:17:41,434
Yeah, sure thing, man, yeah.

1956
01:17:41,436 --> 01:17:42,868
- Good hanging with you today.
- Yeah, you too, brother.

1957
01:17:42,870 --> 01:17:45,371
Yeah.

1958
01:17:45,373 --> 01:17:46,773
- Later.
- See you.

1959
01:17:46,775 --> 01:17:48,108
[clears his throat]

1960
01:17:48,110 --> 01:17:50,577
And hey, you should come up
to school some time

1961
01:17:50,579 --> 01:17:51,777
and visit me
and meet my friends.

1962
01:17:51,779 --> 01:17:53,546
I think you'd like them.

1963
01:17:53,548 --> 01:17:54,648
Yes, dude.

1964
01:17:54,650 --> 01:17:56,082
That sounds awesome.
Just let me know.

1965
01:17:56,084 --> 01:17:58,421
- [Nate] I will.
- Cool.

1966
01:17:59,421 --> 01:18:01,388
Uh...

1967
01:18:01,390 --> 01:18:03,657
Hey, man, good luck
with the whole Machelle thing.

1968
01:18:03,659 --> 01:18:05,826
Yeah, thanks.

1969
01:18:05,828 --> 01:18:07,397
Cool.

1970
01:18:15,537 --> 01:18:17,440
[sighs]

1971
01:18:27,850 --> 01:18:29,718
[sighs]

1972
01:18:32,721 --> 01:18:36,325
[turn signal ticking]

1973
01:18:42,163 --> 01:18:44,434
[sighs]

1974
01:19:24,640 --> 01:19:26,609
[sighs]

1975
01:19:29,845 --> 01:19:30,747
[Amy] Hey.

1976
01:19:33,614 --> 01:19:34,716
[Nate] Hey.

1977
01:19:36,552 --> 01:19:37,951
Do you remember me?

1978
01:19:37,953 --> 01:19:40,754
Yeah, I do.
It's uh... it's...

1979
01:19:40,756 --> 01:19:41,921
- [Amy] Amy.
- Amy. It's Amy, right.

1980
01:19:41,923 --> 01:19:44,724
Oh, my gosh.
It's so nice to see you.

1981
01:19:44,726 --> 01:19:45,759
Yeah, it's good to see you, too.

1982
01:19:45,761 --> 01:19:46,662
I didn't think I'd...

1983
01:19:47,895 --> 01:19:49,496
- I know. This is weird, right?
- Wow, this is really weird.

1984
01:19:49,498 --> 01:19:50,732
- Yeah.
- Uh...

1985
01:19:53,468 --> 01:19:55,469
Oh, my God.
I'm so sorry about yesterday.

1986
01:19:55,471 --> 01:19:56,403
I'm so, so sorry.

1987
01:19:56,405 --> 01:19:57,571
I'm not, like, a drug dealer
or anything.

1988
01:19:57,573 --> 01:19:58,772
It's fine.

1989
01:19:58,774 --> 01:19:59,673
My friend, he's just like...
My friend from high school,

1990
01:19:59,675 --> 01:20:01,474
he's just, like,
out-of-his-mind crazy.

1991
01:20:01,476 --> 01:20:02,975
I, uh...

1992
01:20:02,977 --> 01:20:04,478
I'm sorry, that must have scared
the shit out of you.

1993
01:20:04,480 --> 01:20:05,379
It's okay.

1994
01:20:05,381 --> 01:20:07,680
Seriously, no.
I have crazy friends too.

1995
01:20:07,682 --> 01:20:09,014
- You do?
- Yeah.

1996
01:20:09,016 --> 01:20:10,082
So, okay, get this,

1997
01:20:10,084 --> 01:20:13,786
yesterday my friend
sold ecstasy to my brother.

1998
01:20:13,788 --> 01:20:15,221
- Was he a little brother or?
- Yeah, yeah, little brother.

1999
01:20:15,223 --> 01:20:16,022
Little brother, okay.

2000
01:20:16,024 --> 01:20:18,591
Yeah, he's 15, so, yeah.

2001
01:20:18,593 --> 01:20:19,559
- Okay.
- Yeah, little.

2002
01:20:19,561 --> 01:20:21,961
It's young to be doing ecstasy.

2003
01:20:21,963 --> 01:20:23,563
[both laugh]

2004
01:20:23,565 --> 01:20:24,831
- Fuck, you must've been...
- Yeah, I know.

2005
01:20:24,833 --> 01:20:25,898
You must've been furious.
That's...

2006
01:20:25,900 --> 01:20:27,834
Oh, I was pissed.

2007
01:20:27,836 --> 01:20:29,605
So pissed but...

2008
01:20:30,638 --> 01:20:31,638
I think I was more just pissed

2009
01:20:31,640 --> 01:20:32,975
at being friends with her
in the first place.

2010
01:20:33,775 --> 01:20:35,445
You know? But...

2011
01:20:36,011 --> 01:20:37,710
What are you gonna do?

2012
01:20:37,712 --> 01:20:38,879
We all need crazy friends,
right?

2013
01:20:38,881 --> 01:20:41,581
I mean, they're the ones
we make all our memories with.

2014
01:20:41,583 --> 01:20:43,617
That's why we keep them around.

2015
01:20:43,619 --> 01:20:45,852
Yeah, that's true. There's...

2016
01:20:45,854 --> 01:20:50,023
There's no way I'll ever forget
these last two days, so...

2017
01:20:50,025 --> 01:20:51,461
I agree with you there.

2018
01:20:53,695 --> 01:20:55,565
[Nate] That's for sure.

2019
01:21:01,970 --> 01:21:03,539
Uh...

2020
01:21:06,675 --> 01:21:07,577
It's...

2021
01:21:08,610 --> 01:21:10,480
It is really nice
to see you again.

2022
01:21:11,980 --> 01:21:13,915
It's really nice
seeing you, too.

2023
01:21:17,619 --> 01:21:19,489
[sighs]

2024
01:21:20,655 --> 01:21:21,688
[both chuckle]

2025
01:21:21,690 --> 01:21:26,028
[rock music playing]

2026
01:21:29,698 --> 01:21:31,066
Oh, wait.

2027
01:21:32,767 --> 01:21:34,733
Holy shit.
Wait, we're getting married?

2028
01:21:34,735 --> 01:21:36,870
Uh...

2029
01:21:36,872 --> 01:21:38,071
What?

2030
01:21:38,073 --> 01:21:40,307
No, I mean, like you seem
really nice and pretty and all,

2031
01:21:40,309 --> 01:21:42,675
but, uh,

2032
01:21:42,677 --> 01:21:44,109
I don't know, that's...
that's kind of crazy.

2033
01:21:44,111 --> 01:21:45,911
What are you talking about?

2034
01:21:45,913 --> 01:21:48,982
Fuck, it said in two years.
I don't...

2035
01:21:48,984 --> 01:21:50,716
I don't see myself
getting married

2036
01:21:50,718 --> 01:21:52,652
until I'm at least, like...

2037
01:21:52,654 --> 01:21:53,920
I don't know, like, 30.

2038
01:21:53,922 --> 01:21:55,688
Do you think you're
hot shit or something?

2039
01:21:55,690 --> 01:21:56,723
No, really, do you think

2040
01:21:56,725 --> 01:21:58,058
that I'm not
good enough for you?

2041
01:21:58,060 --> 01:21:59,359
[Nate] Oh, no.

2042
01:21:59,361 --> 01:22:01,894
No, no, I wasn't saying that.
I was just saying, like, it's...

2043
01:22:01,896 --> 01:22:03,330
Well, I mean, you know,
it's a really big commitment...

2044
01:22:03,332 --> 01:22:04,798
It's a commitment?

2045
01:22:04,800 --> 01:22:05,832
You know, have fun

2046
01:22:05,834 --> 01:22:07,334
committing to jerking
yourself off every night.

2047
01:22:07,336 --> 01:22:08,803
You're a fucking virgin.

2048
01:22:09,337 --> 01:22:10,670
Wait, no, I'm not.

2049
01:22:10,672 --> 01:22:11,904
Yeah, yeah, you are.

2050
01:22:11,906 --> 01:22:14,040
I can smell it on you,
you fucking weirdo.

2051
01:22:14,042 --> 01:22:15,108
Oh, my God, I was just saying...

2052
01:22:15,110 --> 01:22:16,910
"Oh my God, I was just... I..."

2053
01:22:16,912 --> 01:22:18,812
You know what? Save it, okay.

2054
01:22:18,814 --> 01:22:20,850
I'm leaving.
Go fuck yourself.

2055
01:22:22,351 --> 01:22:23,886
[Nate] Oh.

2056
01:22:25,354 --> 01:22:26,819
Oh...

2057
01:22:26,821 --> 01:22:28,955
We could get married, I...

2058
01:22:28,957 --> 01:22:30,991
Shit.

2059
01:22:30,993 --> 01:22:33,093
Shit. Okay.

2060
01:22:33,095 --> 01:22:34,693
Okay.

2061
01:22:34,695 --> 01:22:36,630
Fuck.

2062
01:22:36,632 --> 01:22:37,967
Fuck!

2063
01:22:43,971 --> 01:22:45,640
[sighs]

2064
01:22:51,846 --> 01:22:52,747
Fuck it.

2065
01:22:58,919 --> 01:23:01,720
[sighs]

2066
01:23:01,722 --> 01:23:04,760
["Mystic Rabbit" playing]

2067
01:23:04,935 --> 01:23:09,935
Subtitles by explosiveskull

2068
01:23:15,870 --> 01:23:17,770
♪ The days go on ♪

2069
01:23:17,772 --> 01:23:19,406
♪ The days go on ♪

2070
01:23:19,408 --> 01:23:21,041
♪ I traveled in my mind ♪

2071
01:23:21,043 --> 01:23:23,410
♪ Through illusions I find ♪

2072
01:23:23,412 --> 01:23:24,810
♪ Mystic Rabbit knows ♪

2073
01:23:24,812 --> 01:23:27,046
♪ Where the carrot grows ♪

2074
01:23:27,048 --> 01:23:28,180
♪ Never trust a man ♪

2075
01:23:28,182 --> 01:23:30,416
♪ Who says he always knows ♪

2076
01:23:30,418 --> 01:23:33,687
♪ So goodbye ♪

2077
01:23:33,689 --> 01:23:37,424
♪ Little ones ♪

2078
01:23:37,426 --> 01:23:40,859
♪ So goodbye ♪

2079
01:23:40,861 --> 01:23:45,098
♪ Little ones ♪

2080
01:23:45,100 --> 01:23:46,866
♪ Forever in the sun ♪

2081
01:23:46,868 --> 01:23:48,934
♪ Is a time to be spent ♪

2082
01:23:48,936 --> 01:23:50,437
♪ Forever in the sun ♪

2083
01:23:50,439 --> 01:23:52,805
♪ You'll know
everywhere I went ♪

2084
01:23:52,807 --> 01:23:54,139
♪ Life is like a train ♪

2085
01:23:54,141 --> 01:23:56,443
♪ And I'm living on the tracks ♪

2086
01:23:56,445 --> 01:23:57,876
♪ Some people go strange ♪

2087
01:23:57,878 --> 01:23:59,879
♪ They don't ever come back ♪

2088
01:23:59,881 --> 01:24:02,948
♪ So goodbye ♪

2089
01:24:02,950 --> 01:24:06,952
♪ Little ones ♪

2090
01:24:06,954 --> 01:24:10,255
♪ So goodbye ♪

2091
01:24:10,257 --> 01:24:12,193
♪ Little ones ♪

2092
01:24:14,796 --> 01:24:21,102
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

2093
01:24:22,204 --> 01:24:28,778
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

2094
01:24:29,845 --> 01:24:33,949
♪ Oh, oh ♪

2095
01:24:37,084 --> 01:24:41,289
♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪

2096
01:26:02,369 --> 01:26:04,269
♪ The days go on ♪

2097
01:26:04,271 --> 01:26:06,171
♪ The days go on ♪

2098
01:26:06,173 --> 01:26:07,907
♪ I traveled in my mind ♪

2099
01:26:07,909 --> 01:26:10,108
♪ Through illusions I find ♪

2100
01:26:10,110 --> 01:26:11,310
♪ Mystic Rabbit knows ♪

2101
01:26:11,312 --> 01:26:13,880
♪ Where the carrot grows ♪

2102
01:26:13,882 --> 01:26:15,081
♪ Never trust a man ♪

2103
01:26:15,083 --> 01:26:17,015
♪ Who says he always knows ♪

2104
01:26:17,017 --> 01:26:20,185
♪ So goodbye ♪

2105
01:26:20,187 --> 01:26:24,157
♪ Little ones ♪

2106
01:26:24,159 --> 01:26:27,292
♪ So goodbye ♪

2107
01:26:27,294 --> 01:26:29,899
♪ Little ones ♪

2108
01:26:32,167 --> 01:26:36,135
♪ Oh, oh ♪

2109
01:26:36,137 --> 01:26:39,942
♪ Oh ♪