A Case for Normal Cock

<kissing and moaning sounds>

Mmmmm so glad you made a move tonight! I don't think I could have put up with another date of waiting!

<more kissing> The way you just grabbed my ass and kissed me outside the restaurant... God I loved it...

<giggling> No... no no no not my neck I'm so <moaning> sensitive there! Ohhhh God... you're so confident... it's driving me CRAZY... <kissing>

Mmmmmm I was gonna make my way down there eventually, but if you insist! <kissing> Fuck, look at that bulge, you must be pretty big. Definitely bigger than my ex! <unzipping> And he was one of the biggest I'd ever ha-<gasp> Holy shit. I'm afraid to take off the boxers! That looks... almost too big... <pulling boxers down> Fuck! <laughing incredulously> That's huge! Like... pornstars would be jealous of this fucking thing.

<nervously>I don't think I CAN suck you off! I can try, sure... <licking and sucking sounds, straining to stretch one's mouth out>

<gasping for breath> Nope, nope nope nope! That's just too fucking much. I can ... give you a hand job... but my arm would probably get tired pretty quickly <giggling> Fuck me? With that? I don't fucking think so! Well what do you want me to with it? I enjoy a nice thick cock, sure. And yes, size is important, but I don't want this fucking thing beating the shit out of my cervix all night! Too small can sometimes be a deal breaker, but this is the first time I've ever had to say no cause it's too big!

<exasperated> Yes, yes it's very impressive to look at! <sarcastic golf clapping> Congratulations, you have a very big, very thick, very handsome penis! But I am a normal woman with a normal mouth and a normal vagina, and that's just downright unwieldy! <laughing> I mean, maybe if you go down to the bar and helicopter that monster around you'll get some size queen to hop on it, but not me!

Oh, don't get all pissy! Here, lay back, I'll at least jerk you off since you paid for dinner. <stroking> But I wanna get off too, so put that fucking mouth to work! What? What do you mean you don't eat pussy? It's 20-fucking-14, they still make guys that don't eat pussy? What do you expect, just to whip out that cartoonishly large schlong and just expect girls to be all over it? When was the last time you were balls deep in a girl? Never? That's what I thought! Like, don't get me wrong, it's very impressive and imposing and when I first saw it I got turned on... but just trying to understand the logistics of it all makes me feel... kinda sad for you.

I mean, a normal dick I can take all the way in my mouth, touch every last bit of it with my mouth and tongue. A normal dick I can bend over and take as hard as I want it as deep as I want it. This thing? This thing any girl would have to be PRETTY fucking careful to not impale herself on! <chuckling> There are parts of your cock that will probably NEVER feel a warm mouth or a wet pussy.

No, no, no, don't be sad. There's someone out there for you I'm sure. You gonna cum? Fine, fine, fine, you can cum in my mouth! <sucking and licking sounds, mouth filled with cum> Mmmmmmm <swallowing> But it's not me! I'm sorry. I'm gonna go give my ex a call, see if he's still up.