The Internship (2013)

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An old man...

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...turned ninety-eight

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Won the lottery
and died the next day

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Why is this shit on
the get-psyched mix'?

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If I don't throw you
a curveball, you get

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bored and the mix
loses its intended effect.

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I want to get revved up and
this song isn't doing it.

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I defy you to crush this
chorus and not get psyched.

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Won't happen.

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Don't you think?

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It's like rain...

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...on your wedding day

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A free ride...

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...when you've already paid

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It's good advice...

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Help me out here!

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...that you just didn't take

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And who would have thought?

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It figures

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Mr. Play It Safe...

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Classic Alanis.

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...was afraid to fly

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He was afraid.

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- Bring it home.
- Oh, yeah.

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Go home, Papi. Yes!

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We got ou rjam on now.
Jump to it!

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It was a dry June.

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It needn't be said out loud,
but we need this sale.

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I'm so confident
we'll close this,

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I'm ordering
the Pappy Van Winkle.

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It's pricey, but I want to
spiritually invest in our success.

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If you didn't order the Pappy,
I'd send you back to the car...

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...to listen to
the get-psyched mix again!

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Go over the stat sheet.

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Bob Williams. Married 16 years.
Wife Karen. One daughter.

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That's page one.
Let me hip you to page two.

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Daughter's name
is Skyler. Big into

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gymnastics. Aces
on the pommel horse.

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He don't just tell it,
he shows it with pictures.

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Everyone's searching for
something, right, Bob?

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Love. Success.

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But what's the one thing
no one can get more of?

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Time.

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And you can't fight it.

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Oh, you don't have to tell me.
Look at my little girl.

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How old is Skyler now?
Just turned nine.

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Nine?! Skyler's nine?!

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Good Lord. How old does that make all of us?
Don't answer that, Bob!

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I was about to answer.

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Soon she'll be borrowing
Karen's makeup and

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you'll have two beauties
on your hands!

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Lock the door.
It's coming. Double digits.

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Skyler still giving them
hell on the pommel horse?

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Want to see a photo? If
it's not too much trouble.

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Let me show you Sky.

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Look at her.

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She's really sprouted.

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Yeah, Skyler's
really slimming down.

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I'll tell you what, she's
eating really healthy.

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Mostly fruits and nuts.
Her choice.

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No telling what this girl on a
squirrel diet could end up doing.

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Win us the gold,
make us proud?

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Damn right she could. I think
she's already made you proud.

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Guilty, my friend.

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Oh, guys, it goes so fast.

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Like a freight train on the
track, clickety-clack.

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Now she's got a boyfriend-- a
guy you'll like, hopefully.

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Clickety-clack,
she's married.

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Clickety-clack,
she's putting you in a home!

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She would do it, too.
She would.

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Only when you forget who she is.
I'm kidding!

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it feels good to
laugh about Alzheimer's.

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You can't control time.

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But you can manage it.

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Mmm.
Bob...

77
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...the Chronoshock
Aught Thirteen.

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Carpe diem. These
babies will fly off your shelf.

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I know you have six
stores now, so you'll

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probably want a larger order
than last year's.

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You're kidding, right?

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Your business
has been folded.

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I'm sorry?

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No, there's been some chatter. The
last few years have been rough.

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But who hasn't
felt the pinch?

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They didn't
tell you, did they?

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I thought you guys wanted to
grab dinner for old times' sake.

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Your company is closed. I hate
to be the one telling you that.

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I know that I can't
buy the watches because...

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...your company doesn't exist
anymore, but I wish I could!

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That's how good
you guys are!

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One round of Pappy Van Winkle.
Enjoy, gentlemen.

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Oh.

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Wow. That is
expensive stuff.

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You know, Bob, uh...

96
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...do you mind--

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Say no more. I'm doing this.

98
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Let's slice
the pie three ways.

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That's silly.
I'm doing really, really...

100
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really well right now and
you guys are not... at all.

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Let me do this.

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Let's just split it.
Go Dutch.

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Okay.

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Let's be three Dutchmen. But
this Dutchman's going to pay

105
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when he can
in a couple weeks.

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What the fuck, Sammy?

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What the fuck me?
What the fuck you!

108
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Who told you you could
barge into my office

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without an appointment?

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You closed
the company?!

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Then you send us out on a
sale we really needed and had

112
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Bob Williams
drop that bomb on us?!

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Bob Williams' got
a big fucking mouth.

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Yeah, he does.

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Forget the sale. Nobody
wears a watch anymore--

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they check their phones.

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Disagree.
Cite your source.

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Kids, maybe.
There's a broader market.

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Lorraine,
what time is it?

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10:26.

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One hip pioneering secretary
does not a cultural trend make.

122
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She's 75. Watches are
obsolete, and so are you two.

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Obsolete'?
What does that mean?

124
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It means everything's
computerized now!

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It's cheaper for a machine
to tell companies

126
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what to order than
a manufacturer's rep.

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No, people have a deep
mistrust of machines.

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Have you seen
"Terminator"?

129
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Or "Two"?
Or "Three"? Or "Four"?

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Yep. Mmm-hmm.
All of them.

131
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People want to deal with
people, not Terminators.

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People hate people!
Times have changed.

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That's so negative.

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Luckily I saw this coming, cashed
out, bought a condo in Miami...

135
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...new tits for the wife. Silicone.
It's legal again.

136
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Saline's out?

137
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Me and the old lady
will be tucked away nice.

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Great for you, huh?
Perfect.

139
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So that's it, right?

140
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But what about us, Sammy?

141
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You two were great
salesmen. The best!

142
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But at the end of the day,
you're grinders.

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Foot soldiers.
You'll never be generals.

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I'm going to say
something harsh now.

145
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Now you're going to
say something harsh?

146
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Strap it in, 'cause it
ain't pretty out there.

147
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And you two are dinosaurs.

148
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Face it. Where you're going...

149
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...you've already been.

150
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Thank you for your service.

151
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What are we going to do?

152
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I don't know.

153
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But I have to
worry about the now.

154
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I don't know what I'm going
to say to Megan.

155
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It's like rain...

156
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No. Let it play.

157
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For the love of God,
let it play.

158
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It's a free ride
when you've already paid

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Go.

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Megan,
let's talk about this.

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Is it because I'm too unselfish in bed?
I can change.

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It won't be easy,
but I'll do it.

163
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It's always darkest
before the dawn.

164
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No, Billy. It's actually darkest
in the middle of the night.

165
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Enough's going on without
arguing about proverbs.

166
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I knew things weren't great, but to
come home to a foreclosure sign?

167
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Can we hug? Can I touch it? No!

168
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I could have avoided this if the
Bob Williams deal hadn't gone bad.

169
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You blew that?

170
00:08:15,495 --> 00:08:18,465
Not so much that I blew it
as the company shut down

171
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and took our jobs away.

172
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Sweetheart, I promise
I can pay for all of this.

173
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It's not about the money, Billy.
This is about you.

174
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You talk a big game, but
never do anything about it!

175
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You say we'll go to Spain-- but
have I ever been to Barcelona?

176
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Barthelona! And not
yet, but we're going.

177
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What?

178
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We are not
going to Barthelona.

179
00:08:41,354 --> 00:08:42,981
We discussed going
to Barthelona...

180
00:08:43,064 --> 00:08:46,238
...but we are never
going to go to Barthelona.

181
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Not with that
attitude we're not.

182
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Do you even hear yourself?
Yes.

183
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I'm glad you said some of that--
we're in a relationship and

184
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I'm glad we're
committed to it.

185
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You know how badly
I want to believe that?

186
00:08:57,162 --> 00:09:00,792
Because I've been with you a long
time and nothing ever gets better.

187
00:09:01,416 --> 00:09:02,463
Honey, you're...

188
00:09:02,834 --> 00:09:04,711
You're such a great guy...

189
00:09:04,794 --> 00:09:08,264
...but you always screw things
up and let people down.

190
00:09:09,132 --> 00:09:12,853
Billy, I love you, but I'm
tired of being let down.

191
00:09:19,517 --> 00:09:22,145
That's terrible,
Nicky. Are you okay?

192
00:09:22,228 --> 00:09:26,074
I should have gone on my own
when I had the chance. Stupid!

193
00:09:26,149 --> 00:09:29,403
You did the right thing. Got
a paycheck, played it smart.

194
00:09:29,569 --> 00:09:30,821
Dad would have been proud.

195
00:09:30,987 --> 00:09:34,457
Proud of what? I didn't play it smart.
I played it safe.

196
00:09:34,532 --> 00:09:37,206
Look where I am now.
Proud?

197
00:09:37,660 --> 00:09:40,129
At your nephew's Little League game.
Cheer up!

198
00:09:40,705 --> 00:09:41,797
Come on.

199
00:09:41,873 --> 00:09:43,170
All right, Tate!

200
00:09:43,249 --> 00:09:45,593
Here we go, Tate!
Put some wood on it!

201
00:09:45,794 --> 00:09:46,920
He's a great kid.

202
00:09:47,253 --> 00:09:49,347
I keep telling you
you'd be a terrific father.

203
00:09:49,464 --> 00:09:51,762
Yep, you do keep telling me that.

204
00:09:51,841 --> 00:09:54,594
Unfortunately, it would require
having a relationship lasting longer

205
00:09:54,677 --> 00:09:56,179
than three months.

206
00:09:56,262 --> 00:09:58,264
I'm not sure
it would require that.

207
00:09:58,765 --> 00:10:00,267
Let me call Kevin.

208
00:10:00,350 --> 00:10:02,193
I'm sure your
boyfriend's great,

209
00:10:02,268 --> 00:10:04,111
but I don't want
to work for someone...

210
00:10:04,187 --> 00:10:06,360
...who spent all
last Thanksgiving

211
00:10:06,439 --> 00:10:08,112
explaining the meaning
of his tattoo.

212
00:10:08,525 --> 00:10:11,028
Be reasonable, Nicky.
Take the job.

213
00:10:11,528 --> 00:10:13,201
What else
are you going to do?

214
00:10:13,655 --> 00:10:15,703
That's it. Just
take the walk, Eagle Eye.

215
00:10:15,782 --> 00:10:17,125
Walk's as good
as a hit, come on.

216
00:10:17,283 --> 00:10:19,627
What is this guy saying?
Bullshit.

217
00:10:19,702 --> 00:10:22,330
Nick. Nick! Walk's not
as good as a hit.

218
00:10:22,413 --> 00:10:24,461
It's not as good
as a double or a triple.

219
00:10:24,541 --> 00:10:25,838
It's not as good
as a dinger.

220
00:10:25,917 --> 00:10:28,420
Go on, take a big cut, Tate.
Nick!

221
00:10:28,920 --> 00:10:30,547
Get off the field.
What are you doing?

222
00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:32,974
You're calling him Eagle Eye
to get him not to swing?

223
00:10:33,299 --> 00:10:35,301
Come on,
he's 12 years old.

224
00:10:35,426 --> 00:10:37,349
He's got the rest
of his life to take a walk.

225
00:10:37,428 --> 00:10:39,556
How about you take a walk, pal?
And get off my field!

226
00:10:39,681 --> 00:10:41,433
Just stop calling him
Eagle Eye, okay?

227
00:10:41,516 --> 00:10:42,938
Oh, I'm gonna
call him Eagle Eye.

228
00:10:43,059 --> 00:10:44,652
Oh, no, you're not. Yes, I am.

229
00:10:44,894 --> 00:10:46,817
You're Eagle Eye.
Want a piece of me?

230
00:10:52,485 --> 00:10:54,829
- Go ahead, Tate. Swing!
- Let him go.

231
00:10:54,904 --> 00:10:56,906
I'm okay.
I'm okay.

232
00:10:56,990 --> 00:10:59,960
Play ball. Come on, Tate.
Swing big!

233
00:11:06,958 --> 00:11:10,428
Read "Moneyball," asshole.
Walks are as good as hits.

234
00:11:14,757 --> 00:11:17,510
Just when you think your
day couldn't get any worse,

235
00:11:17,594 --> 00:11:19,096
it got worse.

236
00:11:19,304 --> 00:11:20,647
I feel like my day
bent me over,

237
00:11:20,722 --> 00:11:22,599
put a ball in my mouth
and fucked me bad.

238
00:11:24,434 --> 00:11:27,028
Is it just me, or does life look
a lot like those hillbillies

239
00:11:27,103 --> 00:11:28,696
from "Deliverance" now?

240
00:11:28,771 --> 00:11:30,648
It's got me over
by the tree there,

241
00:11:30,732 --> 00:11:32,405
just told me
I had a pretty mouth.

242
00:11:32,734 --> 00:11:35,487
You over, squealing like
a pig on all fours.

243
00:11:36,696 --> 00:11:39,040
I'm looking, where's Burt
Reynolds with the crossbow?

244
00:11:39,115 --> 00:11:40,241
He's not coming.

245
00:11:40,825 --> 00:11:42,498
We're there.
It's gonna happen.

246
00:11:42,911 --> 00:11:45,164
You're gonna get raped.
You know what it is?

247
00:11:45,538 --> 00:11:47,256
I feel like
life's inside of me.

248
00:11:47,332 --> 00:11:50,552
Just working, just pushing.
Just going all after it.

249
00:11:50,877 --> 00:11:52,754
And all of a sudden,
life pulls out.

250
00:11:52,837 --> 00:11:54,134
But he's gonna
scurry up the pillow.

251
00:11:54,464 --> 00:11:56,637
Boom, just explodes
right in my fucking mouth.

252
00:11:58,384 --> 00:11:59,431
How are you?

253
00:11:59,636 --> 00:12:01,354
Hey.
Hey, cute kid.

254
00:12:01,763 --> 00:12:02,855
How old is she?

255
00:12:03,139 --> 00:12:04,891
She's a boy.
Okay.

256
00:12:05,308 --> 00:12:06,730
Still very attractive.

257
00:12:06,976 --> 00:12:08,569
Without pink or blue,
it's hard to tell,

258
00:12:08,645 --> 00:12:09,646
but the features
are great,

259
00:12:09,729 --> 00:12:10,981
maybe put him
in some modeling.

260
00:12:11,231 --> 00:12:13,325
That's what they're going for,
that right-down -the-middle thing.

261
00:12:14,025 --> 00:12:17,404
How many different ways do
we have to say, "I give up"?

262
00:12:17,528 --> 00:12:21,203
Say "Uncle," Say "Mercy," before
life stops whaling away on us.

263
00:12:21,282 --> 00:12:23,080
I mean,
we are getting pounded.

264
00:12:23,159 --> 00:12:25,537
I feel like our whole
generation of sheep

265
00:12:25,620 --> 00:12:27,748
has been sold
a bad bill of goods.

266
00:12:27,830 --> 00:12:31,130
We were told, "Go to
college, get good grades."

267
00:12:31,209 --> 00:12:33,052
Wait, you didn't
go to college.

268
00:12:33,127 --> 00:12:34,970
I'm saying in theory,
in concept,

269
00:12:35,046 --> 00:12:37,174
our generation was told
that you go to college,

270
00:12:37,257 --> 00:12:39,760
YOU get a job,
YOU get a mortgage,

271
00:12:39,842 --> 00:12:42,595
and here we did everything the way we
were supposed to, and what do we get?

272
00:12:42,679 --> 00:12:44,022
Where's our thanks?
Nothing.

273
00:12:45,890 --> 00:12:47,767
I'm gonna call Kevin
about that job.

274
00:12:48,434 --> 00:12:50,482
Kevin'?
Thanksgiving tattoo?

275
00:12:51,854 --> 00:12:53,276
We're not that low,
are we, Nick?

276
00:13:25,805 --> 00:13:28,228
Show me one
little something here.

277
00:13:32,895 --> 00:13:34,238
What are you
going to do, Billy?

278
00:14:27,992 --> 00:14:30,836
There he is!
Nickrophiliac! Hey.

279
00:14:32,413 --> 00:14:33,756
How you been?
Good.

280
00:14:33,998 --> 00:14:35,124
Just working away.

281
00:14:35,249 --> 00:14:36,341
I see that.

282
00:14:36,667 --> 00:14:40,672
Don't slag off on the corners.
They are so important.

283
00:14:41,005 --> 00:14:43,508
People track shit
in here all the time.

284
00:14:43,841 --> 00:14:46,845
And I mean
literally dog shit.

285
00:14:47,095 --> 00:14:48,267
Jesus!

286
00:14:48,513 --> 00:14:49,856
I should have worn gloves.
Huh?

287
00:14:50,098 --> 00:14:51,270
I said I should
have worn gloves.

288
00:14:51,391 --> 00:14:52,608
They won't help.

289
00:14:52,850 --> 00:14:54,523
You don't want protector duty?

290
00:14:54,769 --> 00:14:58,364
'Cause I can put you out at the
curb, twirling the big arrow.

291
00:14:58,606 --> 00:15:00,449
Hot sun beating
down on you?

292
00:15:00,691 --> 00:15:02,318
I've lost three guys
to skin cancer!

293
00:15:02,485 --> 00:15:04,112
We call that curb
"the widowmaker."

294
00:15:04,362 --> 00:15:06,205
I don't want to go
out to the widowmaker.

295
00:15:06,447 --> 00:15:08,870
How would you fare out there,
with that alabaster skin?

296
00:15:09,117 --> 00:15:10,460
I don't know.

297
00:15:10,576 --> 00:15:11,953
I'll tell you.
You'd be dead in a year.

298
00:15:14,705 --> 00:15:15,706
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Jeggings.

299
00:15:16,040 --> 00:15:17,383
Jeggings,
five o'clock.

300
00:15:18,126 --> 00:15:19,423
Where?
Right there.

301
00:15:20,503 --> 00:15:23,757
I'd like to play around in that
rumpus room, you know what I mean?

302
00:15:24,048 --> 00:15:26,050
Have you done the back door yet?
What?

303
00:15:26,175 --> 00:15:28,269
Back door?
Back door action?

304
00:15:28,845 --> 00:15:32,019
"Knock-knock.
It's me."

305
00:15:32,098 --> 00:15:33,350
"With my penis."

306
00:15:34,517 --> 00:15:37,521
A life changer.
It is a life changer!

307
00:15:37,687 --> 00:15:40,941
You VIP your way
into that back alley,

308
00:15:41,023 --> 00:15:43,276
you'll never think about
the main entrance anymore.

309
00:15:43,359 --> 00:15:45,032
You know what I mean
by the main entrance?

310
00:15:45,111 --> 00:15:48,240
We're talking dick
into the vagina.

311
00:15:48,865 --> 00:15:51,163
This is
an awkward conversation.

312
00:15:51,284 --> 00:15:53,958
Why? Because you're
dating my sister!

313
00:15:54,036 --> 00:15:58,291
Oh! Yeah. Well, don't think we didn't
go through a period of adjustment.

314
00:15:58,458 --> 00:15:59,459
Adjustment?

315
00:15:59,709 --> 00:16:01,052
Can you gentlemen
help me?

316
00:16:01,294 --> 00:16:03,092
Yes.
Nick is one of our best.

317
00:16:03,296 --> 00:16:06,891
In fact, his entire family knows
their way around a mattress.

318
00:16:09,218 --> 00:16:10,219
Get it!

319
00:16:11,012 --> 00:16:14,516
My question is about memory
foam versus standard...

320
00:16:14,765 --> 00:16:17,769
...specifically as it
relates to lumbar support.

321
00:16:17,852 --> 00:16:19,024
What?

322
00:16:19,103 --> 00:16:20,104
Lumbar support.

323
00:16:20,438 --> 00:16:24,113
Great choice of mattress. Why
don't you lie down there?

324
00:16:24,442 --> 00:16:26,410
Let's work our
way through this

325
00:16:26,527 --> 00:16:28,450
conundrum. What I
think you're asking--

326
00:16:29,280 --> 00:16:31,032
Billy, I'm with a customer.

327
00:16:31,282 --> 00:16:33,034
Maybe start off on this.

328
00:16:33,284 --> 00:16:34,410
Yeah, just lie down.

329
00:16:34,535 --> 00:16:35,627
Come here for a second.

330
00:16:36,245 --> 00:16:37,337
What are you doing here?

331
00:16:37,413 --> 00:16:39,711
I've seen the future and
it is beautiful for us!

332
00:16:39,957 --> 00:16:43,382
I don't know what you got, but I got
a job and I don't want to lose it.

333
00:16:43,461 --> 00:16:44,633
Can we discuss this later?

334
00:16:44,712 --> 00:16:47,465
No. The future
doesn't know later.

335
00:16:47,715 --> 00:16:50,218
What? All the future is
is later.

336
00:16:50,468 --> 00:16:53,722
That's literally what the future is.
What are you talking about?

337
00:16:54,138 --> 00:16:55,139
Google.

338
00:16:56,641 --> 00:16:58,985
The place is amazing.
They have nap pods,

339
00:16:59,101 --> 00:17:01,479
massage rooms,
a volleyball court.

340
00:17:01,729 --> 00:17:05,074
It's ranked as the greatest
place to work at in America!

341
00:17:05,316 --> 00:17:08,490
It's a technology company-- a
field we know jack squat about.

342
00:17:08,736 --> 00:17:11,580
Look, Google needs us.
And Google wants us.

343
00:17:11,822 --> 00:17:15,998
They do? You sweet son of a bitch!
You got us jobs at Google?!

344
00:17:16,244 --> 00:17:17,587
Well, it's not
actually a job.

345
00:17:17,828 --> 00:17:18,920
What do you mean?

346
00:17:19,163 --> 00:17:20,756
Oh, it's an interview for
an internship that has

347
00:17:20,831 --> 00:17:23,505
a better-than-not chance of
materializing into a job.

348
00:17:23,751 --> 00:17:26,174
Now you are
making me very angry!

349
00:17:26,420 --> 00:17:28,047
You want me to leave my job...

350
00:17:28,130 --> 00:17:29,882
...to go for an interview,
not for a job, but for

351
00:17:29,966 --> 00:17:32,970
an internship that may or
may not lead to a job?

352
00:17:33,594 --> 00:17:36,268
Aren't you tired of asking
forjust enough to get by?

353
00:17:36,514 --> 00:17:38,187
Yes.
I want to do something...

354
00:17:38,432 --> 00:17:40,685
...that matters.
I want to have a life

355
00:17:40,810 --> 00:17:43,108
I'm excited about
and that's great.

356
00:17:43,354 --> 00:17:45,573
Nick, I want us to
go to California.

357
00:17:45,690 --> 00:17:47,943
And I want us to get
these jobs at Google.

358
00:17:48,359 --> 00:17:50,361
I'm going to
speak to a manager.

359
00:17:50,611 --> 00:17:52,454
Terrific!
He's right over there.

360
00:17:52,697 --> 00:17:54,699
Let's roll over
onto the stomach.

361
00:17:55,032 --> 00:17:56,329
He'll be very helpful.

362
00:17:56,409 --> 00:17:58,628
What we're going to
do is get a little

363
00:17:58,703 --> 00:18:01,957
support for the hips. Imagine
a pillow right there.

364
00:18:02,206 --> 00:18:05,210
Then we separate the feet.
Create a little heat dispersion.

365
00:18:05,459 --> 00:18:06,802
Excuse me!

366
00:18:07,128 --> 00:18:09,631
Is there something
I can help you with?!

367
00:18:09,714 --> 00:18:11,762
What?!

368
00:18:11,966 --> 00:18:13,309
I'm trying to buy a mattress.

369
00:18:13,634 --> 00:18:14,806
Unbelievable!

370
00:18:15,052 --> 00:18:19,228
Our interview's in one hour. This
might be the last chance we got.

371
00:18:19,473 --> 00:18:21,100
How's it going,
Gossip Girls'?

372
00:18:21,183 --> 00:18:22,560
C.W. just called.
You're canceled.

373
00:18:22,643 --> 00:18:23,769
Excuse me?

374
00:18:23,853 --> 00:18:26,447
You're peddling him
a bunch of crap, just like

375
00:18:26,522 --> 00:18:28,524
the crap merchandise
you two used to shill.

376
00:18:28,733 --> 00:18:30,531
So listen up,
Marfan Syndrome.

377
00:18:30,693 --> 00:18:32,036
What?
Marfanism.

378
00:18:32,236 --> 00:18:34,739
Big man's disease.
The giant killer. You.

379
00:18:35,031 --> 00:18:36,374
We're the same height.

380
00:18:36,574 --> 00:18:38,417
We are not the same height.

381
00:18:38,701 --> 00:18:40,453
I'm handsome tall.

382
00:18:40,536 --> 00:18:43,210
You're the type of tall where,
you walk through the airport...

383
00:18:43,414 --> 00:18:45,041
people stop eating
and look at you.

384
00:18:45,249 --> 00:18:48,093
You're a freak. Nick, you
have a customer waiting.

385
00:18:48,419 --> 00:18:50,888
Nick, we have
our future waiting.

386
00:18:51,255 --> 00:18:52,928
Nick, you know
what that says?

387
00:18:53,215 --> 00:18:54,717
No, I don't read Sanskrit.

388
00:18:54,925 --> 00:18:57,098
"Make reasonable choices."

389
00:18:57,386 --> 00:19:00,105
That's an odd thing to get
tattooed on your neck.

390
00:19:00,389 --> 00:19:02,391
Just get back to work!

391
00:19:03,893 --> 00:19:06,487
God! I'm sorry you
had to see that, ma'am.

392
00:19:06,562 --> 00:19:08,906
Now let's get back to you
and pelvic ventilation.

393
00:19:09,106 --> 00:19:10,278
Kevin!

394
00:19:12,234 --> 00:19:14,783
You've been saying insulting
things to me all day.

395
00:19:15,237 --> 00:19:16,363
What are you doing?

396
00:19:16,489 --> 00:19:17,615
Taking the shirt off.

397
00:19:17,907 --> 00:19:19,955
I don't know what happens
to a dream deferred.

398
00:19:20,242 --> 00:19:22,745
Does it dry up,
like a raisin in the sun?

399
00:19:22,953 --> 00:19:26,799
Or does it explode?
I don't want to find out.

400
00:19:28,584 --> 00:19:30,586
You just made the worst
mistake of your life.

401
00:19:30,961 --> 00:19:34,636
Hey, hey! You take the shirt
off, it doesn't go back on.

402
00:19:34,965 --> 00:19:36,638
There's not
a second chance!

403
00:19:38,969 --> 00:19:40,186
I'll see you in hell!

404
00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:43,766
We're meeting
the interviewer in here?

405
00:19:43,891 --> 00:19:44,983
No, not in here.

406
00:19:45,267 --> 00:19:47,269
We're meeting him in here.
It's a Hangout.

407
00:19:47,436 --> 00:19:49,484
People do interviews
on the Internet.

408
00:19:49,814 --> 00:19:52,658
I like it.
Now it says here that the...

409
00:19:52,942 --> 00:19:55,286
...internship is only
for college students.

410
00:19:55,486 --> 00:19:59,332
Way ahead of you. I enrolled us
at the University of Phoenix.

411
00:19:59,657 --> 00:20:02,456
That proud online institution.
Go Fighting Phoenixes!

412
00:20:03,661 --> 00:20:06,164
Wait--you put my
major down as physics?

413
00:20:06,497 --> 00:20:10,218
Why? I don't know shit about physics.
Physics scares me.

414
00:20:10,543 --> 00:20:13,217
These guys paint
the corner of the plate.

415
00:20:13,295 --> 00:20:15,389
They won't go down the middle
and ask about physics.

416
00:20:15,631 --> 00:20:17,474
Too obvious.
I took it off the table.

417
00:20:17,717 --> 00:20:19,515
Good.
Hide in plain sight.

418
00:20:19,593 --> 00:20:23,143
But you put
down sales as your major?

419
00:20:23,305 --> 00:20:25,979
Because I'm a talker.
I figure I should dazzle.

420
00:20:26,225 --> 00:20:29,570
I thought about this--
hide your vacancy and let me dazzle.

421
00:20:30,146 --> 00:20:31,819
Are you done?
There's a 15-minute limit.

422
00:20:32,231 --> 00:20:34,905
Sorry--the big boys need the
computer a little longer.

423
00:20:35,151 --> 00:20:38,496
But we can make this a win-win
for you-- go get a soda.

424
00:20:38,738 --> 00:20:40,331
Put some sugar
in your body.

425
00:20:41,115 --> 00:20:42,116
Enjoy it.

426
00:20:42,491 --> 00:20:43,583
Cute kid.

427
00:20:44,076 --> 00:20:47,421
Here they are. When I hit this,
they'll be able to see us.

428
00:20:47,621 --> 00:20:48,964
Get in close so
they can see us.

429
00:20:49,248 --> 00:20:50,750
The webcam's small.
Come here.

430
00:20:51,083 --> 00:20:52,426
Don't crowd me.

431
00:20:52,668 --> 00:20:54,011
Get cheek to cheek.
I get you.

432
00:20:54,253 --> 00:20:56,426
They can't see us.
I understand that.

433
00:20:56,672 --> 00:20:58,595
Put your fucking cheek next to mine!
I get it!

434
00:20:58,674 --> 00:20:59,891
We can see you guys!

435
00:21:00,134 --> 00:21:02,637
Okay, great!  Hi!
My name is Billy!

436
00:21:02,845 --> 00:21:04,472
We can hear you fine
as well.

437
00:21:04,680 --> 00:21:05,681
Oh, great.
Good.

438
00:21:05,973 --> 00:21:07,520
Billy McMahon.
Nick Campbell.

439
00:21:07,808 --> 00:21:09,151
I'm Benjamin.
Allison.

440
00:21:09,351 --> 00:21:10,352
We're thirsty, too.

441
00:21:10,644 --> 00:21:13,864
Slow down, camper. I'm not an ATM.
I have a job interview here.

442
00:21:14,315 --> 00:21:15,658
We'll be back.

443
00:21:16,025 --> 00:21:17,698
Are you in a library?

444
00:21:17,943 --> 00:21:20,446
We are. Some beautiful
little kids here.

445
00:21:20,696 --> 00:21:23,449
A program we're involved in.
We take suburban kids

446
00:21:23,532 --> 00:21:25,705
and teach them what
it's like to be homeless.

447
00:21:25,951 --> 00:21:26,952
What's it called?

448
00:21:27,286 --> 00:21:28,287
It's called, uh...

449
00:21:28,412 --> 00:21:29,459
Attitude Adjustment.

450
00:21:29,538 --> 00:21:31,085
We're helping the kids.

451
00:21:31,165 --> 00:21:34,385
We did our interview here so
we could help out, and also

452
00:21:34,460 --> 00:21:36,303
we don't have webcams
on our computer.

453
00:21:36,462 --> 00:21:38,464
If you don't have
a webcam on your

454
00:21:38,589 --> 00:21:40,637
computer,
how do you do coding?

455
00:21:40,883 --> 00:21:42,226
Coding?

456
00:21:42,468 --> 00:21:44,812
Under "computer skills",
you put "C++".

457
00:21:45,054 --> 00:21:46,556
That's actually a C+.

458
00:21:46,889 --> 00:21:50,735
The second plus reflects my attitude
of how I felt about the C+.

459
00:21:50,976 --> 00:21:53,274
It was a typing class. Same
principle, just no engine

460
00:21:53,354 --> 00:21:55,607
in the baby.
More like "quick brown fox".

461
00:21:55,815 --> 00:21:58,238
Put your hands
in the basin.

462
00:21:58,317 --> 00:22:00,160
But that helped me when
I started my journey into

463
00:22:00,236 --> 00:22:03,331
computers, because I knew
where to put my hands.

464
00:22:03,405 --> 00:22:05,999
Okay, let's focus on
this--you're currently

465
00:22:06,075 --> 00:22:07,918
enrolled at the University
of Phoenix online?

466
00:22:08,327 --> 00:22:09,579
Yes, we are.

467
00:22:09,745 --> 00:22:10,997
Damn right we are.

468
00:22:11,247 --> 00:22:13,500
It's the oldest
institution of its kind.

469
00:22:13,582 --> 00:22:16,256
Many people refer to it as the
Harvard of Internet colleges.

470
00:22:16,502 --> 00:22:18,095
Oh! I hadn't heard that.

471
00:22:18,254 --> 00:22:19,847
No, that has not
made it out here.

472
00:22:20,172 --> 00:22:21,298
That reputation.

473
00:22:21,423 --> 00:22:22,595
Well, we're Phoenix proud.

474
00:22:22,675 --> 00:22:25,554
That's fine. We're going
to ask you some questions

475
00:22:25,636 --> 00:22:27,183
some of our candidates
find a bit odd.

476
00:22:27,513 --> 00:22:29,356
Let's get weird!
No judgment. Shoot.

477
00:22:29,598 --> 00:22:33,523
You're shrunken down to the size of
nickels and dropped into a blender.

478
00:22:33,602 --> 00:22:34,694
What do you do?

479
00:22:34,770 --> 00:22:37,023
Is anything else
in the blender?

480
00:22:37,356 --> 00:22:38,608
Uh, I don't know.

481
00:22:38,858 --> 00:22:41,702
It makes a difference. Are there ice cubes?
Is this a daiquiri?

482
00:22:41,944 --> 00:22:43,446
Is there rum?
Is it a smoothie?

483
00:22:43,696 --> 00:22:46,620
It's been a long week-- maybe these
little guys want to live a little.

484
00:22:46,866 --> 00:22:48,709
Okay, let's say it's empty.

485
00:22:48,993 --> 00:22:50,336
In that case, it's easy.

486
00:22:50,411 --> 00:22:51,458
Why?

487
00:22:51,537 --> 00:22:55,041
If we're nickel-size and the
blender's empty, we go on our backs.

488
00:22:55,374 --> 00:22:56,375
Flat, like this.

489
00:22:56,458 --> 00:22:57,630
Enjoy that breeze.

490
00:22:57,710 --> 00:22:59,383
Stiff as a board,
light as a feather.

491
00:22:59,628 --> 00:23:01,471
Like it's a fan.
Let the wind whip.

492
00:23:04,300 --> 00:23:05,392
Like getting an MRI.

493
00:23:05,634 --> 00:23:06,635
Once the blender's on,
it's on forever.

494
00:23:06,802 --> 00:23:07,803
Forever.

495
00:23:08,053 --> 00:23:11,057
Respectfully, I have to disagree.
We sold blenders...

496
00:23:11,307 --> 00:23:14,311
...and even the best model
only runs non-stop for, what?

497
00:23:14,560 --> 00:23:15,982
Even the Germans--

498
00:23:16,228 --> 00:23:19,823
Yeah, even a Braun will only run
non-stop for 10 or 11 hours.

499
00:23:20,065 --> 00:23:21,908
So we'll get out and when
we do, we're better off,

500
00:23:21,984 --> 00:23:24,078
because what doesn't kill
you makes you stronger.

501
00:23:24,320 --> 00:23:26,414
I'd like to big-picture
this for a second.

502
00:23:26,655 --> 00:23:29,408
Just like the founders of Google.
Big-picture Googling.

503
00:23:29,742 --> 00:23:32,086
It's not so much
getting out of the blender...

504
00:23:32,328 --> 00:23:35,081
...as what happens next.
That's the question.

505
00:23:35,331 --> 00:23:39,677
Two nickel-sized men free in the world.
Think of the possibilities.

506
00:23:39,919 --> 00:23:41,512
Off the top of my head...

507
00:23:41,754 --> 00:23:43,097
My head's swimming.

508
00:23:43,213 --> 00:23:44,590
Sunglass repair?
Those little screws.

509
00:23:44,840 --> 00:23:46,638
Put us in those
submarines they put

510
00:23:46,759 --> 00:23:48,511
in people's bodies
to fight diseases.

511
00:23:48,761 --> 00:23:50,513
That's cutting edge.

512
00:23:50,679 --> 00:23:52,431
Okay, that's not real,
the submarines.

513
00:23:52,681 --> 00:23:56,185
Wait--we were stuck in a blender,
now we're saving lives. What?!

514
00:23:56,435 --> 00:23:57,527
What?

515
00:23:57,686 --> 00:23:59,108
What?
What?

516
00:23:59,271 --> 00:24:02,115
I'll recap. We started in a
blender, now we're saving lives!

517
00:24:02,232 --> 00:24:03,358
What?!

518
00:24:03,609 --> 00:24:04,610
What?

519
00:24:04,860 --> 00:24:08,535
Wait a minute! We were stuck in a
blender and now we're saving lives?!

520
00:24:08,781 --> 00:24:10,783
You guys led us to this.
Thank you.

521
00:24:11,033 --> 00:24:12,330
I think we've gotten
a little far afield.

522
00:24:12,451 --> 00:24:13,703
A little off-topic.

523
00:24:13,953 --> 00:24:16,126
I'll get inside you
and I'll fight for you.

524
00:24:16,372 --> 00:24:17,669
Thank you.

525
00:24:17,790 --> 00:24:19,042
Which one of you
is physics?

526
00:24:19,291 --> 00:24:23,467
Mr. Campbell? Maybe you could
expound on this from a physics aspect.

527
00:24:23,796 --> 00:24:25,139
Physics.

528
00:24:27,049 --> 00:24:29,973
Listen, I could bend
your ear about physics...

529
00:24:30,219 --> 00:24:34,224
...and physical phenomena, but the
truth is, we were in a blender.

530
00:24:34,473 --> 00:24:37,317
We'd lost our jobs,
and we'd given up.

531
00:24:37,810 --> 00:24:40,734
So we already answered the question
when we took this interview.

532
00:24:40,980 --> 00:24:43,824
We got ourselves out,
and here we are.

533
00:24:44,149 --> 00:24:46,072
If you really want
to know what happens

534
00:24:46,235 --> 00:24:48,158
when you take two
guys out of a blender...

535
00:24:48,404 --> 00:24:50,156
I'm sorry, Allison, is it?

536
00:24:51,323 --> 00:24:55,078
Then give us a shot. I think
you'll be happy you did.

537
00:24:57,246 --> 00:24:58,964
Who is
our next applicant?

538
00:24:59,289 --> 00:25:01,587
Ah, our two daiquiri men.

539
00:25:01,792 --> 00:25:04,295
So what do
we think? Dana?

540
00:25:04,628 --> 00:25:07,131
- You're kidding, right?
- No.

541
00:25:07,631 --> 00:25:08,632
Eleanor?

542
00:25:08,966 --> 00:25:12,140
Hmm. They seem like really nice
guys, but I don't think so.

543
00:25:12,428 --> 00:25:13,395
Okay! Moving on.

544
00:25:13,470 --> 00:25:14,562
Can I say something?

545
00:25:14,638 --> 00:25:16,640
You can. We will
resent you for wasting

546
00:25:16,765 --> 00:25:18,813
our time, but don't
let that stop you.

547
00:25:19,101 --> 00:25:22,275
It's just...diversity
is in our DNA, right?

548
00:25:22,479 --> 00:25:23,822
I thought the goal
was to find people

549
00:25:23,939 --> 00:25:25,316
with a different
way of thinking.

550
00:25:25,607 --> 00:25:28,281
That doesn't mean
we have to hire them.

551
00:25:28,485 --> 00:25:30,283
Very good point, Dana.
Moving on!

552
00:25:30,487 --> 00:25:33,832
You read their resumes,
right? They have more years...

553
00:25:34,116 --> 00:25:35,709
...of sales and
life experience than

554
00:25:35,826 --> 00:25:37,453
the age of most
of our interns.

555
00:25:37,661 --> 00:25:41,131
Plus, our final judgment is
always based on the Layover Test.

556
00:25:41,623 --> 00:25:44,968
Who would you rather sit with at an
airport bar for a 6-hour delay'?

557
00:25:45,085 --> 00:25:46,962
The ten millionth
kid who knows if you

558
00:25:47,046 --> 00:25:50,095
shrink your strength-to-weight
ratio you can jump higher? Duh.

559
00:25:50,507 --> 00:25:52,976
Or the out-of-the-box
thinkers who turned

560
00:25:53,093 --> 00:25:55,516
being stuck in
a blender into an advantage.

561
00:26:00,601 --> 00:26:01,978
Tell me how you feel
What's your fantasy?

562
00:26:02,061 --> 00:26:04,905
I see you on the beach
down in Mexico

563
00:26:05,272 --> 00:26:07,821
You can put your feet up
Be my señorita

564
00:26:07,900 --> 00:26:10,574
We ain't gotta rush
Just take it slow

565
00:26:10,652 --> 00:26:13,451
You'll be in the high life
Soaking up the sunlight

566
00:26:13,530 --> 00:26:15,624
Anything you want is yours

567
00:26:16,325 --> 00:26:19,249
I heard you're living life
like you should

568
00:26:19,328 --> 00:26:22,002
You say you never
had it so good

569
00:26:23,540 --> 00:26:25,383
So it begins.
Here we go.

570
00:26:25,667 --> 00:26:26,668
This place is incredible.

571
00:26:26,794 --> 00:26:27,841
Where do we check in?

572
00:26:28,045 --> 00:26:29,342
Let's ask somebody.

573
00:26:29,880 --> 00:26:32,554
Oh, excuse me!
I'm sorry, excuse me--

574
00:26:36,887 --> 00:26:38,013
Billy?

575
00:26:38,722 --> 00:26:40,895
It's scary because it's new.

576
00:26:41,183 --> 00:26:44,232
Let's check in. Head towards
those big, big letters.

577
00:26:44,520 --> 00:26:46,067
What's up, family?

578
00:26:46,897 --> 00:26:49,741
Tell me how you feel
What's your fantasy?

579
00:26:49,817 --> 00:26:52,570
I see you on the beach
down in Mexico

580
00:26:52,736 --> 00:26:55,455
You can put your feet up
Be my señorita

581
00:26:55,531 --> 00:26:58,205
We ain't gotta rush
Just take it slow

582
00:26:58,534 --> 00:27:01,037
You'll be in the high life
Soaking up the sunlight

583
00:27:01,328 --> 00:27:03,376
Anything you want is yours

584
00:27:05,082 --> 00:27:06,254
Name?

585
00:27:06,625 --> 00:27:09,845
You say you never
had it so good

586
00:27:13,257 --> 00:27:15,555
You never had it so good

587
00:27:18,887 --> 00:27:20,730
You never had it so good

588
00:27:21,598 --> 00:27:25,273
Picture the greatest amusement
park you ever went to as a kid.

589
00:27:25,561 --> 00:27:29,907
Now imagine a place nothing like
it and a million times better.

590
00:27:30,107 --> 00:27:31,950
That's where we are.

591
00:27:32,276 --> 00:27:35,120
I'll grab us a coffee.
You check us in.

592
00:27:42,119 --> 00:27:43,120
Good morning.

593
00:27:43,620 --> 00:27:44,792
What's the damage here?

594
00:27:44,913 --> 00:27:46,130
Nothing.

595
00:27:48,125 --> 00:27:49,798
For these?
Free.

596
00:27:50,085 --> 00:27:51,086
They're complimentary?

597
00:27:51,295 --> 00:27:53,639
Complimentary.
Free. Whatever you want.

598
00:27:54,089 --> 00:27:56,308
You're saying
whatever I walk away with--

599
00:27:56,592 --> 00:27:57,764
It's free.

600
00:27:59,261 --> 00:28:00,262
Have bananas.

601
00:28:00,470 --> 00:28:04,100
I probably should. This is the
most important meal of the day.

602
00:28:04,308 --> 00:28:05,605
Take two, they're free.

603
00:28:05,726 --> 00:28:06,978
For my day, I need it.

604
00:28:07,311 --> 00:28:08,813
What about the bagels
and all that?

605
00:28:08,937 --> 00:28:10,484
Free. Anything you want.

606
00:28:10,772 --> 00:28:12,991
If you're insisting,
I'll have a couple.

607
00:28:13,275 --> 00:28:15,323
Like four.
Just whatever it is.

608
00:28:15,611 --> 00:28:17,284
What about five?
Free, too.

609
00:28:17,487 --> 00:28:18,659
Make it seven, then.

610
00:28:18,947 --> 00:28:20,119
And if you want to whip
up some other drinks.

611
00:28:20,199 --> 00:28:22,577
Do you have a to go cup,
like a Guzzler?

612
00:28:23,827 --> 00:28:25,170
Excuse me.

613
00:28:25,495 --> 00:28:27,497
Do you know what
launch this was from?

614
00:28:27,789 --> 00:28:29,336
Sorry, I have a meeting.

615
00:28:30,000 --> 00:28:32,002
Oh, no, no, no. I don't
want to hold you. I just--

616
00:28:33,337 --> 00:28:36,136
I was just curious. Was this
thing actually in space?

617
00:28:36,840 --> 00:28:39,013
If there were only
a webpage you could go to.

618
00:28:39,343 --> 00:28:42,847
Where we could just type things
in and search for answers.

619
00:28:43,138 --> 00:28:45,186
Ah, yes,
that would be nice.

620
00:28:46,683 --> 00:28:48,856
Nick Campbell. Intern.

621
00:28:49,519 --> 00:28:51,362
Dana Simms. Late.

622
00:28:52,022 --> 00:28:53,865
Me, too.
Have to rush off.

623
00:28:54,149 --> 00:28:57,653
And it's SpaceShipOne. First
private manned spaceflight.

624
00:28:57,861 --> 00:28:59,454
Winner of the X Prize.

625
00:29:07,204 --> 00:29:08,547
Are those your dads?

626
00:29:08,830 --> 00:29:13,552
Same-sex partners make excellent parents.
I so wish my parents were gay.

627
00:29:13,835 --> 00:29:15,087
When did twenty start
to look like twelve?

628
00:29:15,212 --> 00:29:16,509
Oh, man.

629
00:29:16,713 --> 00:29:18,056
Of course
I'll work my hardest.

630
00:29:18,340 --> 00:29:21,184
Mom, how can I work harder than my hardest?
That's impossible.

631
00:29:21,385 --> 00:29:24,059
Okay, okay, I will.
Yes, I love you.

632
00:29:24,554 --> 00:29:25,555
Mom?

633
00:29:26,223 --> 00:29:28,225
Billy McMahon. Billy McMahon.
How are you?

634
00:29:28,892 --> 00:29:30,018
Oh, I'm going to
grab some food.

635
00:29:30,143 --> 00:29:31,235
I'm good.

636
00:29:31,478 --> 00:29:32,570
You all right alone?

637
00:29:35,565 --> 00:29:37,909
This stuff looks good, huh?
Little pick-me-up.

638
00:29:38,318 --> 00:29:39,410
Graham Hawtrey.

639
00:29:39,903 --> 00:29:41,746
I'm so thrilled to be here.
Oh, me, too.

640
00:29:41,989 --> 00:29:43,582
Feels kind of
like the first day of

641
00:29:43,699 --> 00:29:45,326
spring training
for Little League.

642
00:29:47,744 --> 00:29:51,840
I think I have a few more clicks
on the odometer than you kids.

643
00:29:51,957 --> 00:29:54,710
That's why I came over.
I said to myself,

644
00:29:54,793 --> 00:29:57,296
"That man has life experience.
He can teach you a lot."

645
00:29:57,379 --> 00:29:59,473
You have to meet
my friend, Nick. Nicky!

646
00:29:59,715 --> 00:30:01,467
Nickelodeon!
Come here!

647
00:30:02,217 --> 00:30:05,437
Meet Graham. He's in the
internship program with us.

648
00:30:05,679 --> 00:30:07,101
You're interns?

649
00:30:07,347 --> 00:30:08,769
Shut up!
Deal with it.

650
00:30:08,849 --> 00:30:10,476
Shut the fuck up!
Deal with it.

651
00:30:10,642 --> 00:30:11,985
But you're so old.

652
00:30:12,227 --> 00:30:13,570
Oh. Excuse me?

653
00:30:13,812 --> 00:30:15,655
I feel terrible!
I feel so stupid.

654
00:30:15,897 --> 00:30:17,991
I feel terrible.
For what?

655
00:30:18,066 --> 00:30:22,572
I just, you know... I thought
you were important. Oh, shit.

656
00:30:22,821 --> 00:30:25,745
I have to find some people who
actually matter. Good luck!

657
00:30:25,991 --> 00:30:28,744
Why did you bring me
over to meet that guy,

658
00:30:28,827 --> 00:30:30,829
like he was your best friend?
You introduced me to Hitler.

659
00:30:31,079 --> 00:30:33,173
He seemed sweet at first.

660
00:30:33,415 --> 00:30:38,012
My name is Roger Chetty. I am head
of the Google Intern Program.

661
00:30:38,086 --> 00:30:40,054
Welcome to Google.

662
00:30:40,589 --> 00:30:44,264
This will not be your
average internship. Oh, no.

663
00:30:44,593 --> 00:30:46,436
You will do what we do.

664
00:30:46,678 --> 00:30:49,682
And we will watch
how well you do it.

665
00:30:49,931 --> 00:30:52,275
You represent
the finest schools.

666
00:30:52,517 --> 00:30:55,191
Your intelligence and
achievement is well noted...

667
00:30:55,437 --> 00:30:57,155
...but to excel
at this internship,

668
00:30:57,230 --> 00:30:59,858
you're going to need
far more than brain power.

669
00:31:00,108 --> 00:31:01,951
What you're going to need...

670
00:31:05,405 --> 00:31:07,908
Nothing funny. Googliness.

671
00:31:08,241 --> 00:31:12,587
The intangible stuff
that made a search engine...

672
00:31:12,913 --> 00:31:14,756
...into an engine for change.

673
00:31:15,248 --> 00:31:18,252
Now, you will be
divided into teams...

674
00:31:18,543 --> 00:31:21,888
...and by the end of the summer
only one team...

675
00:31:22,089 --> 00:31:25,593
...will be guaranteed a full-time position.
The other...

676
00:31:25,926 --> 00:31:29,100
...95% of you...will not.

677
00:31:29,429 --> 00:31:31,557
You've been split up
into several seminars

678
00:31:31,640 --> 00:31:33,893
to acquaint you with
our campus and culture.

679
00:31:34,434 --> 00:31:36,732
Descriptions have
been emailed to you.

680
00:31:36,937 --> 00:31:40,111
I would wish you luck, but
it's not luck that you need.

681
00:31:40,607 --> 00:31:42,109
Get to work!

682
00:31:42,609 --> 00:31:46,910
This ain't gonna be about getting
coffee and running errands.

683
00:31:47,114 --> 00:31:49,116
It's a mental
Hunger Games against

684
00:31:49,282 --> 00:31:51,284
a bunch of genius kids
for a handful of jobs.

685
00:31:51,576 --> 00:31:53,453
So we nail it. This is
our opening statement.

686
00:31:53,745 --> 00:31:54,962
If it please the court.

687
00:31:55,080 --> 00:31:56,297
Oh, it pleases the court,
counselor.

688
00:31:56,623 --> 00:31:58,751
Workplace Seminar.
A few seats left.

689
00:31:59,918 --> 00:32:00,919
First impression time.

690
00:32:01,044 --> 00:32:02,091
Bingo!

691
00:32:02,254 --> 00:32:03,255
We can do good here.

692
00:32:03,463 --> 00:32:05,966
Shazam! So close
yet so far, boys.

693
00:32:06,299 --> 00:32:08,301
Whoa! Graham,
we were here first.

694
00:32:08,593 --> 00:32:12,143
You're right. You guys could
use the advantage. Go ahead.

695
00:32:12,472 --> 00:32:13,724
What does that mean?

696
00:32:14,015 --> 00:32:16,438
It means that in
a world of excellence,

697
00:32:16,518 --> 00:32:18,896
old and unexceptional
qualifies as diversity.

698
00:32:19,187 --> 00:32:21,360
So go ahead.
What's that saying?

699
00:32:21,565 --> 00:32:23,408
"Age before beauty"?

700
00:32:24,526 --> 00:32:25,527
Thank you.

701
00:32:25,735 --> 00:32:27,112
You're welcome, William!

702
00:32:27,612 --> 00:32:28,613
There's always

703
00:32:28,697 --> 00:32:31,701
some joker who likes
to play fuckaround.

704
00:32:32,117 --> 00:32:35,997
I guess that's you, Graham.
At least we know. Game on.

705
00:32:36,079 --> 00:32:37,080
Good luck, boys.

706
00:32:38,123 --> 00:32:41,002
Google is not
a conventional workplace.

707
00:32:41,084 --> 00:32:43,337
Having said that,
we have rules.

708
00:32:43,753 --> 00:32:45,926
I will ask you
a series of questions.

709
00:32:46,256 --> 00:32:49,260
You will raise the green
paddle to indicate yes...

710
00:32:49,593 --> 00:32:52,938
...and the red paddle
to indicate no.

711
00:32:53,305 --> 00:32:54,932
So, let's begin.

712
00:32:55,265 --> 00:32:58,269
"Having a beer
with your boss."

713
00:32:59,603 --> 00:33:02,447
Some of you are under 21.

714
00:33:02,689 --> 00:33:04,691
Some of us aren't,
so if you want to grab

715
00:33:04,816 --> 00:33:06,864
a cold one with me,
I'd be happy to.

716
00:33:07,110 --> 00:33:09,112
I will not "grab
a cold one" with you.

717
00:33:09,529 --> 00:33:10,576
You get high?

718
00:33:10,697 --> 00:33:11,789
I don't get high.

719
00:33:12,032 --> 00:33:14,535
I'm notjudging.
Just saying. People do it.

720
00:33:14,951 --> 00:33:17,625
If you want something
cold to drink, we'll hook you up.

721
00:33:17,871 --> 00:33:20,215
Okay. Thank you.
Just stop talking to me.

722
00:33:20,457 --> 00:33:22,801
I'm your Bill Holden
in "Stalag 17".

723
00:33:23,126 --> 00:33:24,969
I really don't
get that reference.

724
00:33:25,212 --> 00:33:26,805
Google it.
Got it.

725
00:33:28,131 --> 00:33:29,974
"Dating a fellow intern."

726
00:33:31,635 --> 00:33:34,980
This is Google,
akumenang.com

727
00:33:35,222 --> 00:33:37,224
What about
a full-time employee?

728
00:33:37,474 --> 00:33:40,819
Say, management level
but not a direct supervisor.

729
00:33:41,144 --> 00:33:42,737
Great eyes, and a...

730
00:33:42,979 --> 00:33:47,325
...severity to her look
that is surprisingly sexy.

731
00:33:47,651 --> 00:33:49,324
What's the policy on that?

732
00:33:49,653 --> 00:33:51,155
That's frowned upon also?

733
00:33:51,404 --> 00:33:52,405
So we say no to love?

734
00:33:52,489 --> 00:33:53,581
Say no to love.

735
00:33:53,657 --> 00:33:54,749
That's a no.

736
00:33:55,825 --> 00:33:58,499
"Taking food home
from the office."

737
00:33:58,745 --> 00:34:00,247
Boom. That's a yes.

738
00:34:00,497 --> 00:34:03,000
Are you having difficulty
with this, Mr. McMahon?

739
00:34:03,250 --> 00:34:05,344
Just to drill down on this,
what if it's a

740
00:34:05,502 --> 00:34:07,596
perishable? Like
pudding that was left out?

741
00:34:07,837 --> 00:34:09,339
You'd like to
take home pudding?

742
00:34:09,589 --> 00:34:11,091
I wouldn't mind it.

743
00:34:11,341 --> 00:34:12,342
Oh, yeah.

744
00:34:12,509 --> 00:34:15,012
If it's going to go bad,
is it okay to take it home?

745
00:34:15,262 --> 00:34:16,764
Mmm-hmm. Anything else
you'd like to take home?

746
00:34:17,013 --> 00:34:19,357
Well, salsa or chips.
Something not wrapped.

747
00:34:19,599 --> 00:34:20,691
Salsa, chips and pudding.

748
00:34:20,934 --> 00:34:21,935
Sushi.

749
00:34:22,018 --> 00:34:23,019
Salsa, chips,
pudding and sushi.

750
00:34:23,270 --> 00:34:24,613
Anything else?
Ice cream.

751
00:34:24,854 --> 00:34:26,401
Salsa, chips, pudding,
sushi and ice cream.

752
00:34:26,481 --> 00:34:27,482
Pizza?

753
00:34:27,566 --> 00:34:29,364
Salsa, chips, pudding, sushi,
ice cream and pizza.

754
00:34:30,026 --> 00:34:33,371
Not a frozen pizza. But if
there was a nice pie out...?

755
00:34:33,697 --> 00:34:37,372
I am truly impressed,
Mr. McMahon.

756
00:34:37,659 --> 00:34:38,660
Thank you.

757
00:34:38,785 --> 00:34:39,832
At the both of you.

758
00:34:40,161 --> 00:34:42,835
At how quickly you have
confirmed my doubts about you.

759
00:34:43,707 --> 00:34:47,712
Now, let's try
this one more time.

760
00:34:48,211 --> 00:34:51,715
"Taking food
home...from the office."

761
00:34:54,050 --> 00:34:55,393
Very good.

762
00:34:59,556 --> 00:35:01,729
Ladies and gentlemen,
that is all!

763
00:35:11,067 --> 00:35:13,911
I'm not going to dress it
up-- today didn't go well.

764
00:35:15,739 --> 00:35:19,039
It certainly wasn't the
first impression we wanted.

765
00:35:21,578 --> 00:35:23,080
But here's the deal.

766
00:35:23,705 --> 00:35:26,379
Tomorrow is
the pick teams day, right?

767
00:35:26,750 --> 00:35:30,425
It's important for us to
fall in with a strong team.

768
00:35:30,754 --> 00:35:32,506
If we can surround
ourselves with the right

769
00:35:32,589 --> 00:35:35,433
group of geniuses,
we still got a shot here.

770
00:35:35,925 --> 00:35:37,097
Nicky...

771
00:35:38,261 --> 00:35:39,934
...we can coattail this bitch.

772
00:35:40,221 --> 00:35:42,895
You're right! And there's
no shame in that.

773
00:35:43,141 --> 00:35:46,145
No shame in being the 12th man
at the end of the bench...

774
00:35:46,478 --> 00:35:49,482
...who never gets in the game
but has a lot of enthusiasm.

775
00:35:49,731 --> 00:35:52,985
He waves the towel, doles out
high fives during timeouts.

776
00:35:53,318 --> 00:35:55,491
Because I'll tell
you about that guy--

777
00:35:55,570 --> 00:35:58,323
when the team wins the championship,
he still gets a ring.

778
00:35:58,823 --> 00:35:59,915
Damn right he does.

779
00:36:00,158 --> 00:36:03,332
So we have to be that awkward
seven-footer from Lithuania.

780
00:36:03,662 --> 00:36:06,336
I love your spirit. And I
love you like a brother...

781
00:36:06,581 --> 00:36:09,755
...but I can't have those cold clams
brushing up against me in bed.

782
00:36:10,001 --> 00:36:11,674
Keeping me up.
Suit yourself.

783
00:36:11,920 --> 00:36:13,513
I'll take the bed tomorrow.

784
00:36:13,755 --> 00:36:15,928
Can you hit that light,
Pocahontas?

785
00:36:17,092 --> 00:36:18,685
Tomorrow's a new day.

786
00:36:19,511 --> 00:36:21,855
Welcome to day two!
I am Sid.

787
00:36:22,097 --> 00:36:25,772
Eight-year Googler.
You guys are new Googlers.

788
00:36:26,017 --> 00:36:28,361
Thus, you are Nooglers!

789
00:36:29,771 --> 00:36:32,274
Now, this place is
all about community...

790
00:36:32,524 --> 00:36:35,949
...and collaboration, so you'll
be working in teams from now on.

791
00:36:36,194 --> 00:36:38,447
You have five minutes.
Pick your teams.

792
00:36:38,863 --> 00:36:40,035
You, on me.

793
00:36:40,281 --> 00:36:42,454
Oh! Be picky, okay.
Play hard to get.

794
00:36:42,701 --> 00:36:45,545
Don't be desperate, just be cool.
This is everything!

795
00:36:45,787 --> 00:36:47,130
Are you looking
for someone?

796
00:36:47,372 --> 00:36:48,464
College, major,
SAT score.

797
00:36:48,665 --> 00:36:50,338
Harvard,
computer science, 2390.

798
00:36:50,625 --> 00:36:51,592
Fine. On me, fatface.

799
00:36:51,668 --> 00:36:52,760
My name's Zach.

800
00:36:52,836 --> 00:36:54,179
You.
University of--

801
00:36:54,462 --> 00:36:55,509
No.

802
00:36:56,339 --> 00:36:58,842
Hello, Stanford!
You're coming with me.

803
00:36:59,175 --> 00:37:02,349
University of Phoenix online--
sort of the Harvard of the west.

804
00:37:02,637 --> 00:37:05,356
Why don't we all be a team?
Why don't we all be a team?

805
00:37:05,682 --> 00:37:07,184
Why don't we all be a team?

806
00:37:07,475 --> 00:37:09,523
Please don't touch me.
You're touching me!

807
00:37:09,811 --> 00:37:12,485
Blondie, you're with me on account
of your physical appearance.

808
00:37:12,689 --> 00:37:15,158
Does anyone want to
be on a team with me?

809
00:37:15,358 --> 00:37:18,703
Super fun! Really smart,
but also very fun.

810
00:37:18,987 --> 00:37:22,161
I was voted Most Likely to
Succeed in my chess club.

811
00:37:28,455 --> 00:37:32,335
Um... Mr. Chetty?
I don't have a group.

812
00:37:32,709 --> 00:37:34,552
You'll mentor
the leftovers.

813
00:37:34,878 --> 00:37:38,178
Which it would seem includes
your two charity cases.

814
00:37:39,048 --> 00:37:40,550
Off you go.

815
00:37:45,346 --> 00:37:46,393
Yo, Billy and Nick!

816
00:37:47,056 --> 00:37:48,228
There they are!

817
00:37:48,516 --> 00:37:51,520
I'm Lyle, one of the team managers.
Pound me.

818
00:37:52,395 --> 00:37:55,239
Just putting the fist out without
words is all that's necessary.

819
00:37:55,565 --> 00:37:57,408
Come on, bro, fist me.

820
00:37:57,692 --> 00:37:59,694
That's definitely not right.

821
00:37:59,903 --> 00:38:02,406
You're a manager?
How old are you?

822
00:38:02,697 --> 00:38:06,543
I'm 23. But no worries,
fellas, I'm an old soul.

823
00:38:07,243 --> 00:38:10,087
Well, the thing about that
is, we don't have a team.

824
00:38:10,371 --> 00:38:13,215
We have two--me and Nick. We
don't have the rest of our team.

825
00:38:13,374 --> 00:38:14,466
We didn't...

826
00:38:14,542 --> 00:38:17,716
Correction. You didn't have a
team, but you got one now, son!

827
00:38:17,921 --> 00:38:22,017
'Cause I got a few outliers.
Buh-bam! Kerplash! Zzz-yah!

828
00:38:22,217 --> 00:38:24,891
We about to get it all good
up in this hood, right?

829
00:38:25,261 --> 00:38:28,060
"Outliers". I just dropped
a little G-well on you.

830
00:38:28,264 --> 00:38:30,266
'Cause Malcolm is my dawg.

831
00:38:30,558 --> 00:38:32,526
What you say? Malcolm
is my--

832
00:38:32,769 --> 00:38:34,362
"Outliers",
"10,000 hours".

833
00:38:34,604 --> 00:38:38,609
But let's get a team meeting going, everyone!
Team meet time!

834
00:38:39,275 --> 00:38:40,447
Nick?

835
00:38:40,944 --> 00:38:42,946
What other options
do we have?

836
00:38:47,283 --> 00:38:50,287
Okay! Let's get some meet and
greet going up in this heezy!

837
00:38:50,620 --> 00:38:53,794
I'm Lyle and it's pretty much Wysiwyg--
what you see is what you get.

838
00:38:54,040 --> 00:38:56,042
Been at the Goog
for four years.

839
00:38:56,292 --> 00:38:58,966
Working on seven projies
en este momento.

840
00:38:59,295 --> 00:39:01,297
Wow! Seven projects!

841
00:39:01,548 --> 00:39:04,552
They ask and I do's it. What can I say?
I'm a people pleaser.

842
00:39:04,801 --> 00:39:08,806
'Specially the ladies, my Mercedes!
It's all good in Lyle's hood.

843
00:39:09,305 --> 00:39:12,650
Is Lyle always going to be referring
to himself in the third person?

844
00:39:12,892 --> 00:39:15,236
If he is, I might want to
punch Lyle in the face.

845
00:39:15,478 --> 00:39:16,900
Okay, good note.

846
00:39:17,146 --> 00:39:20,491
- Lyle's still a little nervous.
- Lyle's a first-time manager.

847
00:39:20,733 --> 00:39:22,235
I'll stop that.

848
00:39:22,485 --> 00:39:25,489
Keep it to first and second person.
Who's next?

849
00:39:27,657 --> 00:39:29,330
My name is Yo-Yo Santos.

850
00:39:29,659 --> 00:39:31,502
Yo-Yo, high five.
- Whoa!

851
00:39:32,161 --> 00:39:33,834
Yo-Yo, easy.
I come in peace!

852
00:39:34,080 --> 00:39:36,583
Did you get beat up
a lot in school?

853
00:39:37,166 --> 00:39:38,839
I was homeschooled
by my mom.

854
00:39:39,085 --> 00:39:41,087
Did you get beat up
a lot in homeschool?

855
00:39:41,337 --> 00:39:43,180
Discipline is an important
part of growth.

856
00:39:43,423 --> 00:39:44,766
But my mother was
a very nurturing person.

857
00:39:44,841 --> 00:39:48,436
She provided me selflessly
with the milk of her bosom...

858
00:39:48,678 --> 00:39:50,772
...until I was seven.

859
00:39:50,847 --> 00:39:53,691
So you're tying your shoe,
climbing trees...

860
00:39:53,933 --> 00:39:56,777
blowing up fireworks,
and then you got mouth on Mom.

861
00:39:57,020 --> 00:39:58,613
Breastfeeding
leads to higher I.Q.

862
00:39:59,272 --> 00:40:01,946
Actually, the science
isn't definitive on that.

863
00:40:02,191 --> 00:40:04,614
I was bottle-fed.
It never slowed me down.

864
00:40:04,861 --> 00:40:08,707
Vitamins are vitamins, whether
they come from a teat or a baba.

865
00:40:09,032 --> 00:40:10,033
Wrong.

866
00:40:10,700 --> 00:40:11,701
Sorry, what?

867
00:40:11,951 --> 00:40:14,670
The teat or baba thing,
it's wrong.

868
00:40:14,746 --> 00:40:16,293
I just Googled it.
You're wrong.

869
00:40:18,207 --> 00:40:19,379
Oh, yeah, I'm Stuart.

870
00:40:19,876 --> 00:40:23,221
You know, you can't trust
everything you read on--

871
00:40:23,546 --> 00:40:25,548
The Journal of
the American Medical

872
00:40:25,673 --> 00:40:27,641
Association?
Pretty trustworthy.

873
00:40:27,717 --> 00:40:29,936
It says breast milk
has more nutrients,

874
00:40:30,011 --> 00:40:32,389
which are more easily
digested and absorbed.

875
00:40:32,805 --> 00:40:34,978
Your confusion's understandable--
you were bottlefed.

876
00:40:35,224 --> 00:40:36,225
He's right.

877
00:40:36,476 --> 00:40:39,320
Whoa! Guys, where's all
this hostility coming from?

878
00:40:39,562 --> 00:40:41,405
Where do you think,
you big tree?

879
00:40:41,648 --> 00:40:45,494
Two-fifths of our team are two
old guys who don't know shit.

880
00:40:46,152 --> 00:40:49,998
Okay, I for one am very
happy to have two...

881
00:40:50,657 --> 00:40:53,001
...strapping, mature
gentlemen on the team.

882
00:40:53,076 --> 00:40:54,419
Thank you.

883
00:40:54,494 --> 00:40:56,542
Oh, I'm Neha Patel.
And, oh, my God,

884
00:40:56,621 --> 00:40:59,716
you guys would make
the best Luke and Han.

885
00:40:59,916 --> 00:41:01,759
Oh, "Star Wars" cosplay.
"Cosplay"?

886
00:41:02,001 --> 00:41:03,753
Costume play!
People dress up as

887
00:41:03,920 --> 00:41:05,672
their favorite
movie character.

888
00:41:05,922 --> 00:41:10,348
I'd be slave girl Leia. Yeah. Metal bikini top.
Metal G-string panty.

889
00:41:10,760 --> 00:41:12,433
High-heeled leather boots.

890
00:41:12,679 --> 00:41:15,774
I'm chained at the neck. Not too
constricted, but just enough...

891
00:41:16,099 --> 00:41:17,942
...to make things interesting.

892
00:41:18,184 --> 00:41:19,527
Neck constriction's
interesting.

893
00:41:19,769 --> 00:41:22,693
A few of us get together
and whatever happens happens.

894
00:41:23,940 --> 00:41:27,285
Oh, butworkwise, your skills
aren't really relevant here...

895
00:41:27,527 --> 00:41:29,780
...or in this millennium,
so stay out of

896
00:41:29,946 --> 00:41:32,199
our way-- we'll do
this shit on our own.

897
00:41:32,615 --> 00:41:34,242
Well, I'm loving
this friction.

898
00:41:34,367 --> 00:41:35,960
It's how you get
a fire started.

899
00:41:36,285 --> 00:41:39,289
I'm Nick, this is my pal, Billy,
and despite what you think...

900
00:41:39,580 --> 00:41:41,924
...we'rejust like you,
running down a dream.

901
00:41:42,125 --> 00:41:43,297
All right!

902
00:41:43,626 --> 00:41:45,299
Team Lyle!

903
00:41:45,962 --> 00:41:48,260
Okay, we'll workshop
that. It's in beta.

904
00:41:48,798 --> 00:41:51,677
Okey-doke! Our Translate
lecture is in 15 minutes.

905
00:41:53,428 --> 00:41:57,149
Translate is about giving
everyone access to every word...

906
00:41:57,432 --> 00:42:00,606
...ever written, no matter what
language it was written in.

907
00:42:00,810 --> 00:42:02,938
Because when
the entire world can see,

908
00:42:03,021 --> 00:42:05,820
read and find the rest of
the world's cool stuff...

909
00:42:06,315 --> 00:42:07,487
...good things happen.

910
00:42:07,650 --> 00:42:09,903
Lyle, you laying-in-the-weeds
son of a bitch.

911
00:42:09,986 --> 00:42:12,159
You're hot for teacher,
my man.

912
00:42:13,156 --> 00:42:15,329
I took her dance
class once here,

913
00:42:15,491 --> 00:42:17,664
but she doesn't
even know I exist.

914
00:42:17,994 --> 00:42:20,167
Doesn't know you exist?

915
00:42:20,455 --> 00:42:23,629
You're communicating
with her right here.

916
00:42:23,833 --> 00:42:26,256
Oh, no, this is just
the company intranet.

917
00:42:26,377 --> 00:42:28,800
It has info on
every Google employee.

918
00:42:29,005 --> 00:42:32,009
Birthdays, trivia, meeting
calendars, everything.

919
00:42:33,509 --> 00:42:35,432
Really?
Mmm-hmm.

920
00:42:49,192 --> 00:42:50,819
Ah! Hey. Fancy
seeing you here!

921
00:42:51,027 --> 00:42:54,531
Is it? Or you calendar-stalked
me and knew where I'd be.

922
00:42:54,864 --> 00:42:56,366
Now, am I detecting
a bit of an accent?

923
00:42:56,532 --> 00:42:58,034
You are!

924
00:42:58,326 --> 00:43:00,169
Uh-huh. I have
a very good ear.

925
00:43:00,369 --> 00:43:02,167
English, right?
Hello, guvnor!

926
00:43:02,413 --> 00:43:04,586
Oliver Twist.
"More bread, please."

927
00:43:04,832 --> 00:43:06,175
Australian, actually.

928
00:43:06,584 --> 00:43:08,586
Really? Similar flags,
though.

929
00:43:08,920 --> 00:43:11,264
Kiwi. "Lord
of the Rings" country.

930
00:43:11,506 --> 00:43:14,680
The stain on this one's better,
but the white one's a goner.

931
00:43:15,259 --> 00:43:16,260
I eat very fast.

932
00:43:16,511 --> 00:43:17,558
Bangers and mash.

933
00:43:17,720 --> 00:43:18,767
That's also British.

934
00:43:19,013 --> 00:43:21,015
Vegemite sandwich then,
which you gobble

935
00:43:21,140 --> 00:43:23,188
down so you can get
back to the grind.

936
00:43:23,434 --> 00:43:25,607
It is impressive,
staying at work till

937
00:43:25,728 --> 00:43:27,947
midnight every day.
Also on the calendar.

938
00:43:28,189 --> 00:43:29,361
Look, Nick.

939
00:43:29,774 --> 00:43:32,118
I'm sure you're
very popular with the

940
00:43:32,235 --> 00:43:34,613
19-year-olds at
the University of Phoenix...

941
00:43:34,862 --> 00:43:38,036
...with the southern drawl
and the blond hair and...

942
00:43:38,282 --> 00:43:41,582
...this whole thing you got going
on, but I have to tell you

943
00:43:41,661 --> 00:43:42,958
this is never
going to happen.

944
00:43:43,204 --> 00:43:44,877
"This". What?

945
00:43:46,040 --> 00:43:48,714
Oh, no, no, no! This is me
reaching out as an intern.

946
00:43:48,960 --> 00:43:52,430
They encouraged us to approach experienced
Googlers and pick their brains.

947
00:43:52,505 --> 00:43:56,009
Oh! Oh, I'm sorry!
Of course!

948
00:43:56,134 --> 00:43:59,138
You thought I was-- "Oh, who's
this wanker steaming in?"

949
00:43:59,387 --> 00:44:01,731
You just want to learn!
Well, look.

950
00:44:01,973 --> 00:44:05,648
Sid here is incredible. He's
about to give a talk on HTML5.

951
00:44:05,977 --> 00:44:09,322
Nick is desperate to learn.
He'd love to come along.

952
00:44:09,564 --> 00:44:11,407
Sure. Come on down,
brother!

953
00:44:11,649 --> 00:44:13,322
Sometimes we go
all day, all night.

954
00:44:13,568 --> 00:44:16,321
Oh, I can't start any sooner
than right now. Let's do it.

955
00:44:16,571 --> 00:44:19,165
Come on, everybody!
Where are you going?

956
00:44:19,490 --> 00:44:23,495
Oh, I have a meeting.
But you know that. Cheerio!

957
00:44:24,162 --> 00:44:25,163
Cheerio.

958
00:44:25,496 --> 00:44:28,170
Let's go.
Come on. Don't be shy.

959
00:44:31,836 --> 00:44:34,635
You have a crush
on her, my friend!

960
00:44:35,089 --> 00:44:36,682
Good morning,
interns. Today marks

961
00:44:36,799 --> 00:44:38,426
the first of
several challenges...

962
00:44:38,676 --> 00:44:40,849
...through which your team
shows its merits.

963
00:44:41,095 --> 00:44:43,769
While dogfooding
a new product, Googlers...

964
00:44:44,015 --> 00:44:46,359
...reported a bug that
disabled their audio.

965
00:44:46,601 --> 00:44:50,447
Two million lines of code
are in the source files.

966
00:44:50,688 --> 00:44:52,690
Your job? Find the bug.

967
00:44:52,940 --> 00:44:54,533
Let's check
the user reports.

968
00:44:54,692 --> 00:44:55,693
Check for red flags.

969
00:44:55,818 --> 00:44:56,865
See what
exceptions were thrown.

970
00:44:57,111 --> 00:44:59,785
I start by drawing up
strategies to sift through the code.

971
00:45:00,031 --> 00:45:01,624
Code, right?
Code, right?

972
00:45:01,866 --> 00:45:04,710
So we're looking to kind
of break the password.

973
00:45:04,952 --> 00:45:07,125
Is the answer in
the question? "Bug".

974
00:45:07,205 --> 00:45:08,457
Eureka!

975
00:45:08,539 --> 00:45:10,541
Bug like fly. "The Fly".
ls Chetty a cinephile?

976
00:45:10,791 --> 00:45:12,088
Goldblum!

977
00:45:12,168 --> 00:45:14,011
Mind-boggling no
one's notebook is out.

978
00:45:14,086 --> 00:45:15,087
This gibberish you're
writing may or may not be

979
00:45:15,171 --> 00:45:18,766
helpful. I guarantee what
we're saying is helpful!

980
00:45:19,133 --> 00:45:22,478
We're looking for a bug, not a password.
They're different things.

981
00:45:22,720 --> 00:45:24,438
Keep going with
that human connection.

982
00:45:25,723 --> 00:45:28,067
Go on, stay positive.
Go, go, go.

983
00:45:28,309 --> 00:45:30,482
We'll go on "fly".
'Cause we're "fly"-ing it.

984
00:45:30,728 --> 00:45:32,822
NICKI Fly. Fly. I like that.

985
00:45:33,648 --> 00:45:36,151
Y-L-F. It's a word
scramble, it's "life"!

986
00:45:36,400 --> 00:45:37,868
I can't get
"fly" out of my mind,

987
00:45:37,985 --> 00:45:39,407
and now I'm
going Jennifer Lopez.

988
00:45:39,654 --> 00:45:40,997
Is it a Fly Girl?
Superfly!

989
00:45:41,239 --> 00:45:43,241
Pop fly. Uh, excavation.

990
00:45:43,491 --> 00:45:44,583
Earthquakes! California!

991
00:45:44,825 --> 00:45:46,919
That's it! Write it down!
Do it, do it!

992
00:45:47,161 --> 00:45:48,583
Will you please stop?!

993
00:45:48,829 --> 00:45:51,082
No, we're working!

994
00:45:51,332 --> 00:45:53,676
Yeah, and that's
a Sharpie, genius.

995
00:45:55,169 --> 00:45:56,512
That's my fault.

996
00:45:57,338 --> 00:45:58,840
I'll go ahead and wash that.

997
00:45:59,507 --> 00:46:01,885
Guys, I'm sorry,
but you're not helping.

998
00:46:01,968 --> 00:46:04,517
You're saying a lot of words
really fast that mean nothing.

999
00:46:04,762 --> 00:46:07,686
To find the bug, we need to
review the code and find...

1000
00:46:07,932 --> 00:46:09,934
...the programmer's mistake.
It's the only way.

1001
00:46:10,184 --> 00:46:11,857
But what if it's
not the only way?

1002
00:46:12,520 --> 00:46:14,568
You said
someone programmed it.

1003
00:46:14,689 --> 00:46:16,737
Someone in this building
wrote that code.

1004
00:46:16,816 --> 00:46:18,033
A human being!

1005
00:46:18,109 --> 00:46:19,861
Let's give him
a name--Tony.

1006
00:46:20,444 --> 00:46:22,196
Let's say Tony
likes kayaking.

1007
00:46:22,863 --> 00:46:25,537
Me and Nick become
friends with Tony.

1008
00:46:25,783 --> 00:46:28,457
We throw some beers back,
do some kayaking.

1009
00:46:28,786 --> 00:46:30,459
Tony's bombed on
the open water.

1010
00:46:30,705 --> 00:46:33,379
Next thing you know, we're
gabbing about audio bugs!

1011
00:46:33,708 --> 00:46:35,301
I think it's a great idea.

1012
00:46:35,543 --> 00:46:36,715
Great!
Finally!

1013
00:46:36,961 --> 00:46:38,304
Dark and Stormy feeling us!

1014
00:46:38,546 --> 00:46:39,968
Feeling you big time, buddy.

1015
00:46:40,214 --> 00:46:43,559
In fact, why don't the two of
you go and find the programmer?

1016
00:46:43,884 --> 00:46:45,227
Great. Great idea.

1017
00:46:45,428 --> 00:46:46,554
Yo-Yo, who's our man?

1018
00:46:47,430 --> 00:46:49,558
His name is Charles Xavier.

1019
00:46:50,558 --> 00:46:52,231
Perfect. Nick, write it down.
Steel trap.

1020
00:46:52,560 --> 00:46:55,234
Uh... He's a professor.
At Stanford.

1021
00:46:55,438 --> 00:46:57,236
Just a few
minutes away, really.

1022
00:46:57,315 --> 00:46:58,316
Guys.

1023
00:46:58,399 --> 00:46:59,446
He's in a wheelchair.

1024
00:46:59,734 --> 00:47:01,202
Stanford.
Wheelchair. What else?

1025
00:47:01,277 --> 00:47:02,369
Oh, he's bald!

1026
00:47:02,445 --> 00:47:04,447
May be with his best friend,
who wears a metal helmet.

1027
00:47:04,739 --> 00:47:06,412
He's a genetics professor.

1028
00:47:06,741 --> 00:47:07,913
More, more! Hit us!

1029
00:47:08,117 --> 00:47:09,960
He has a British accent. British!
With my ear, we're done.

1030
00:47:10,202 --> 00:47:13,251
Keep searching.
Think fly, think bug.

1031
00:47:13,331 --> 00:47:14,833
I promise you this somehow
intersects with Goldblum.

1032
00:47:14,915 --> 00:47:16,087
Goldblum. Of course.

1033
00:47:16,208 --> 00:47:17,425
Back to work, guys.

1034
00:47:21,422 --> 00:47:22,924
Hey, Professor, what up?

1035
00:47:27,094 --> 00:47:28,596
Professor
Charles Xavier?

1036
00:47:28,804 --> 00:47:29,976
Very funny.

1037
00:47:30,222 --> 00:47:33,271
British! Professor Xavier,
sorry to bother you. If you--

1038
00:47:33,476 --> 00:47:35,478
Gentlemen, I don't
have time for this.

1039
00:47:35,770 --> 00:47:39,274
Professor Xavier, we know it's you.
We really need your help.

1040
00:47:39,482 --> 00:47:42,326
All right, you found me out.
lam Charles Xavier.

1041
00:47:43,944 --> 00:47:47,619
And that's Cyclops,
and Rogue. We're all here.

1042
00:47:48,282 --> 00:47:52,628
Come closer. I want to share some
of my telekinetic wisdom with you.

1043
00:47:52,953 --> 00:47:55,456
Good, 'cause I want to
know about these bugs.

1044
00:47:58,626 --> 00:47:59,627
Assholes!

1045
00:47:59,835 --> 00:48:01,963
You maniacal monster!

1046
00:48:02,296 --> 00:48:04,640
Professor Xavier
is a total dick!

1047
00:48:06,008 --> 00:48:08,682
Yo to the Yo, have we ensured
it wasn't a networking issue?

1048
00:48:08,844 --> 00:48:10,471
Confirmed there
was no packet loss.

1049
00:48:10,554 --> 00:48:12,682
Almost done checking
the encryption.

1050
00:48:12,973 --> 00:48:16,477
"Almost"? Either you're done or not.
You can't be almost pregnant.

1051
00:48:16,685 --> 00:48:18,187
And she would know, guys.

1052
00:48:18,479 --> 00:48:20,197
Go Google "asshole",
asshole.

1053
00:48:20,481 --> 00:48:23,655
She's right. It's not good enough, Yo-Yo.
Get it together.

1054
00:48:24,193 --> 00:48:25,445
What the fuck
was that?

1055
00:48:25,528 --> 00:48:27,576
I'm punishing myself for
my inferior performance.

1056
00:48:27,655 --> 00:48:30,909
Wow. Good. Great.
That one's crazy.

1057
00:48:30,991 --> 00:48:32,163
And crazy horny over here.

1058
00:48:32,243 --> 00:48:34,962
Let me guess. Big dick,
'cause little dick?

1059
00:48:35,162 --> 00:48:37,836
Does your mind just immediately
go to a penis joke?

1060
00:48:38,124 --> 00:48:40,502
Was that not witty enough?
I'm just busy working.

1061
00:48:40,793 --> 00:48:43,922
That's fine, but I'm
winning the quip-off.

1062
00:48:44,046 --> 00:48:45,423
- That's what you're worried about?
- Yes.

1063
00:48:45,506 --> 00:48:48,350
You're more concerned with
snarky banter than working?

1064
00:48:55,057 --> 00:48:57,776
Hey! Did you guys
find Professor Xavier?

1065
00:48:58,018 --> 00:48:59,019
Yeah, we found him.

1066
00:48:59,270 --> 00:49:02,945
Yeah, thanks so much for that.
Really great team spirit.

1067
00:49:03,190 --> 00:49:04,533
Mind sliding over?

1068
00:49:06,610 --> 00:49:09,614
I'm sorry, it doesn't look like
there's enough room for you.

1069
00:49:12,783 --> 00:49:14,535
Have a great lunch.
Yeah, enjoy it.

1070
00:49:16,245 --> 00:49:17,747
Okay, let's see.

1071
00:49:20,291 --> 00:49:21,634
Let's see.

1072
00:49:21,959 --> 00:49:23,802
- See anything?
- Oh! There's an opening.

1073
00:49:24,044 --> 00:49:25,796
- Is that taken?
- It's taken.

1074
00:49:30,301 --> 00:49:31,974
Let's go over there.

1075
00:49:34,805 --> 00:49:37,228
Hi, Headphones.
Mind if we sit here?

1076
00:49:38,017 --> 00:49:40,145
We can take
that as a yes.

1077
00:49:41,145 --> 00:49:42,818
We have to
at this point.

1078
00:49:43,063 --> 00:49:44,656
How you doing, bud?

1079
00:49:44,899 --> 00:49:48,654
He doesn't even know we exist. He's
like a superhero on this computer.

1080
00:49:48,903 --> 00:49:51,907
Look at him, just crushing
his thing and kicking ass.

1081
00:49:52,323 --> 00:49:55,167
Do you remember what it felt like
to be that good at something?

1082
00:49:56,327 --> 00:49:58,830
Look at this! William.

1083
00:49:59,246 --> 00:50:00,247
Nicholas.

1084
00:50:00,498 --> 00:50:02,500
Person I don't know.

1085
00:50:02,917 --> 00:50:04,590
Thought I'd find you
at the cool kids' table.

1086
00:50:04,835 --> 00:50:07,679
It's like a confederacy
of outcasts out here.

1087
00:50:08,172 --> 00:50:10,846
Heard you had a day
trip to Palo Alto.

1088
00:50:11,175 --> 00:50:14,679
Home of Silicon Valley and
also the X-Men, apparently.

1089
00:50:15,012 --> 00:50:16,434
Where are you
going with this?

1090
00:50:16,680 --> 00:50:20,685
Oh, I just wanted to let you guys
know we won the bug challenge!

1091
00:50:20,935 --> 00:50:22,357
What are you
going to do about it?

1092
00:50:22,603 --> 00:50:25,777
Don't worry about what we'll do or not do.
We'll be just fine.

1093
00:50:26,023 --> 00:50:28,697
You'll be fine?
Keep telling yourself that.

1094
00:50:29,026 --> 00:50:30,448
See you on
the intramural field

1095
00:50:30,611 --> 00:50:32,033
for the next
challenge I'll win.

1096
00:50:32,279 --> 00:50:33,952
Sports! Something
we know about, baby.

1097
00:50:34,073 --> 00:50:35,700
Something we know
a lot about.

1098
00:50:36,033 --> 00:50:37,376
Come on now!
Look at me.

1099
00:50:38,202 --> 00:50:39,249
For real.

1100
00:51:01,934 --> 00:51:04,312
All right, teams, welcome
to the Quidditch pitch.

1101
00:51:04,603 --> 00:51:06,605
Let's have a good clean match, Nooglers.

1102
00:51:13,779 --> 00:51:15,122
Fatty, don't
touch the ball.

1103
00:51:15,322 --> 00:51:17,416
Rules: The Beaters
toss the Bludgers at the

1104
00:51:17,491 --> 00:51:18,993
Chasers then get the
Quaffle through the ring.

1105
00:51:19,285 --> 00:51:20,878
No blagging,
blatching, bumphing,

1106
00:51:20,995 --> 00:51:22,622
haversacking or
Quaffle-pocking.

1107
00:51:22,830 --> 00:51:25,003
No lmperius Curses
or Confundus Charms.

1108
00:51:25,291 --> 00:51:28,636
In the unlikely event of a Dementor
attack, use a Patronus Charm.

1109
00:51:28,836 --> 00:51:30,964
I recommend
the stag personally.

1110
00:51:31,171 --> 00:51:33,139
Lyle, they have
no idea what you're

1111
00:51:33,257 --> 00:51:35,180
talking about.
Use your Muggle words.

1112
00:51:35,467 --> 00:51:38,141
You're making me feel like
I'm back in math class.

1113
00:51:38,345 --> 00:51:41,315
You have a couple savants here
with eye-hand coordination.

1114
00:51:41,390 --> 00:51:43,017
Say "game on"
and let us play!

1115
00:51:43,642 --> 00:51:45,986
Version 2.0: Peg them
with kickballs before

1116
00:51:46,103 --> 00:51:48,481
they throw the volleyball
through the hoop.

1117
00:51:48,689 --> 00:51:50,862
Brooms in, people.
Hufflepuff on three.

1118
00:51:51,150 --> 00:51:52,823
One, two, three--

1119
00:51:52,901 --> 00:51:54,073
Hufflepuff!

1120
00:51:54,194 --> 00:51:56,196
Yeah, son! Let's get it!

1121
00:51:56,488 --> 00:51:57,831
Game time.

1122
00:51:58,157 --> 00:52:00,000
Let's get started in here!

1123
00:52:05,372 --> 00:52:06,715
No mercy!

1124
00:52:06,999 --> 00:52:08,501
No mercy!

1125
00:52:09,543 --> 00:52:11,045
Tips down!

1126
00:52:11,211 --> 00:52:12,383
Blue team ready?

1127
00:52:14,381 --> 00:52:16,054
Red team ready?

1128
00:52:16,342 --> 00:52:17,559
Bangarang!

1129
00:52:17,676 --> 00:52:19,019
Brooms up!

1130
00:52:31,899 --> 00:52:33,196
Ball!

1131
00:52:37,112 --> 00:52:38,238
Yeah!

1132
00:52:38,530 --> 00:52:40,203
Ten points, blue!

1133
00:52:40,449 --> 00:52:42,122
- Billy, talk to me!
- What do I do?

1134
00:52:42,368 --> 00:52:43,620
What are we doing?
It's chaos!

1135
00:52:43,744 --> 00:52:45,087
How do I do it?

1136
00:52:48,540 --> 00:52:49,712
I'm lost!

1137
00:52:49,958 --> 00:52:51,301
Hit up, hit up!

1138
00:52:51,543 --> 00:52:53,671
Whoa, whoa,
what's happening?!

1139
00:52:56,840 --> 00:52:57,841
What the hell was that?

1140
00:52:58,092 --> 00:52:59,844
Try looking up
and giving a shit!

1141
00:52:59,968 --> 00:53:02,016
Come on!

1142
00:53:02,096 --> 00:53:05,441
What am I supposed to-- Come get
some of this! Who do I hit?

1143
00:53:05,766 --> 00:53:08,440
I want somebody to hit!

1144
00:53:08,686 --> 00:53:10,029
Broom between the legs!

1145
00:53:10,270 --> 00:53:11,943
My bad. Lesson learned.

1146
00:53:12,189 --> 00:53:14,612
What the fuck does this
have to do with computers?

1147
00:53:15,567 --> 00:53:17,285
Stop.
Don't move, fatty!

1148
00:53:25,119 --> 00:53:26,211
Blue, ten points!

1149
00:53:26,453 --> 00:53:27,454
Ball!

1150
00:53:28,914 --> 00:53:30,086
Thank you.

1151
00:53:33,168 --> 00:53:34,215
Time out!

1152
00:53:34,294 --> 00:53:35,261
Time.

1153
00:53:38,424 --> 00:53:39,767
Bring it in, guys!

1154
00:53:40,008 --> 00:53:42,352
Good work, everybody.
Except you, Zach.

1155
00:53:42,594 --> 00:53:44,267
It's over.
Our team's a joke.

1156
00:53:44,513 --> 00:53:46,561
Well, lain't laughing.
Are you, Billy?

1157
00:53:46,640 --> 00:53:47,687
Hell, no.

1158
00:53:47,933 --> 00:53:51,278
We need to get our minds
right and start believing.

1159
00:53:51,520 --> 00:53:54,364
This reminds me of a girl
who had to start believing.

1160
00:53:54,440 --> 00:53:55,862
A girl from a steel town
who had the dream...

1161
00:53:56,108 --> 00:53:57,200
...to dance.

1162
00:53:57,443 --> 00:54:00,617
No one believed in the welder girl,
but she believed in herself.

1163
00:54:00,863 --> 00:54:02,957
Are you talking
about "Flashdance"?

1164
00:54:03,198 --> 00:54:05,200
You're damn right I am!

1165
00:54:05,451 --> 00:54:08,625
The deck was stacked against Alex.
You know how she overcame it?

1166
00:54:08,871 --> 00:54:10,999
By believing in
herself and trying.

1167
00:54:11,123 --> 00:54:13,217
She literally had
to become a maniac!

1168
00:54:13,459 --> 00:54:16,963
Have any of you been called a
maniac because you were different?

1169
00:54:17,212 --> 00:54:19,886
My morn calls me a maniac
when I tell her I love her.

1170
00:54:20,132 --> 00:54:23,136
Of course she does! You are a little bit...
in a good way!

1171
00:54:23,552 --> 00:54:26,556
Well, guess what? They called
Bill Gates a maniac, too.

1172
00:54:26,638 --> 00:54:27,890
No question.

1173
00:54:27,973 --> 00:54:30,226
I don't think anyone
called him a maniac.

1174
00:54:30,517 --> 00:54:31,860
I just did!

1175
00:54:31,977 --> 00:54:33,354
You guys are
getting off the point!

1176
00:54:33,562 --> 00:54:35,030
She had to strip
down to nothing!

1177
00:54:35,230 --> 00:54:37,483
She had to sit in a chair,
pull that chain

1178
00:54:37,566 --> 00:54:38,909
to nowhere back and douse
herself with water!

1179
00:54:39,193 --> 00:54:41,036
Where did that water come from?
Who knows?!

1180
00:54:41,236 --> 00:54:43,580
It came from her
belief it was there!

1181
00:54:43,864 --> 00:54:47,539
She believed so hard, she got an
audition at the dance school...

1182
00:54:47,868 --> 00:54:50,872
...and she spun. Oh, she spun.

1183
00:54:51,205 --> 00:54:52,878
And she spun and she spun...

1184
00:54:53,081 --> 00:54:57,052
...and she spun herself into that dance school!
And into our hearts.

1185
00:54:58,212 --> 00:55:02,217
Now, in the second half of whatever
the hell you call this game...

1186
00:55:02,549 --> 00:55:04,222
...can't we all be
that welder girl

1187
00:55:04,343 --> 00:55:06,061
who wants to be
something more?

1188
00:55:06,720 --> 00:55:09,769
I know you're not excited we're on your team.
But we're here.

1189
00:55:10,390 --> 00:55:12,063
We're in this
thing together.

1190
00:55:12,267 --> 00:55:15,237
So I'm asking you, believe in yourselves.
Believe in each other.

1191
00:55:16,438 --> 00:55:18,111
Let's put on
our leg warmers...

1192
00:55:18,398 --> 00:55:19,900
...and dance our asses off.

1193
00:55:20,108 --> 00:55:22,782
Come here, you little lovable maniacs.
Get in here.

1194
00:55:23,070 --> 00:55:26,074
I have an idea that I think
would make Bear Bryant smile.

1195
00:55:26,281 --> 00:55:27,908
I don't know who that
is, but we're listening.

1196
00:55:32,913 --> 00:55:34,085
Let's go!

1197
00:55:36,583 --> 00:55:37,584
Stuart!

1198
00:55:38,585 --> 00:55:39,757
Neha!

1199
00:55:41,088 --> 00:55:43,341
Lyle, hit me! I got it!

1200
00:55:46,176 --> 00:55:47,473
Baby!

1201
00:55:55,102 --> 00:55:57,104
Blind her!
I'm going in!

1202
00:55:59,815 --> 00:56:01,488
Yes!

1203
00:56:09,283 --> 00:56:10,455
Yo-Yo!

1204
00:56:12,953 --> 00:56:14,626
Eat it, Malfoy!

1205
00:56:19,626 --> 00:56:20,627
See you!

1206
00:56:20,711 --> 00:56:22,008
Coming at you, Nick!

1207
00:56:24,548 --> 00:56:26,425
Who's on blondie?

1208
00:56:27,217 --> 00:56:29,060
Let's go, boys!

1209
00:56:33,181 --> 00:56:34,398
Pick and roll!

1210
00:56:35,142 --> 00:56:37,895
Stockton and Malone.
She shoots and scores!

1211
00:56:38,145 --> 00:56:39,818
Billy, what's up!

1212
00:56:41,148 --> 00:56:42,149
Tie game!

1213
00:56:42,482 --> 00:56:43,699
Where were you, huh?!

1214
00:56:43,817 --> 00:56:45,069
I had to use the restroom.

1215
00:56:50,032 --> 00:56:51,375
It's the Golden Snitch!

1216
00:56:51,658 --> 00:56:53,831
Who the fuck is this now?

1217
00:56:54,161 --> 00:56:55,504
Zach, get over here.

1218
00:56:56,330 --> 00:56:58,503
Fatface, it's time
to fake an injury.

1219
00:56:58,707 --> 00:56:59,833
I don't know how.

1220
00:57:01,335 --> 00:57:02,552
Man down!

1221
00:57:04,880 --> 00:57:07,053
Get the tennis ball
and we win!

1222
00:57:14,890 --> 00:57:16,392
Run, you big tree!

1223
00:57:17,017 --> 00:57:18,769
Go!

1224
00:57:18,852 --> 00:57:21,526
Come on, ref!
Are you going to call that?

1225
00:57:34,493 --> 00:57:35,790
Yeah! Yeah!

1226
00:57:46,046 --> 00:57:48,720
That bitch just snaked me!
That must be illegal!

1227
00:57:49,049 --> 00:57:51,097
Sorry. If I didn't
see it, I can't call it.

1228
00:57:51,551 --> 00:57:53,224
You okay, Golden Boy?

1229
00:57:53,387 --> 00:57:54,388
The Snitch is fine.

1230
00:57:54,596 --> 00:57:55,939
G.D. it!

1231
00:57:56,223 --> 00:57:58,442
Don't start that, Yo-Yo.
You did...

1232
00:57:58,725 --> 00:58:00,648
...your best out there.
That's the first time

1233
00:58:00,769 --> 00:58:02,737
we all came together
as a team.

1234
00:58:03,063 --> 00:58:04,736
Billy's right.

1235
00:58:05,107 --> 00:58:07,951
Let's keep it rolling.
Just keep it rolling.

1236
00:58:08,235 --> 00:58:09,908
Come on,
let's get a frosty.

1237
00:58:10,237 --> 00:58:11,409
Nick?

1238
00:58:14,241 --> 00:58:16,084
Would I be wrong to
call you my brother?

1239
00:58:16,284 --> 00:58:19,959
Of course not. I'd do anything for
my little show pony. Anything.

1240
00:58:20,455 --> 00:58:22,082
I need you to ice
my balls for me.

1241
00:58:25,919 --> 00:58:27,136
Brother!

1242
00:58:33,343 --> 00:58:35,516
Oh, boy.

1243
00:58:35,804 --> 00:58:38,307
Time to shut the engines
down for a bit.

1244
00:58:39,099 --> 00:58:43,445
Take a load off, Nicky. What
would I do without these babies?

1245
00:58:43,770 --> 00:58:45,613
This is a "shh" zone.

1246
00:58:45,939 --> 00:58:47,441
Oh, hi! Hey.

1247
00:58:47,774 --> 00:58:49,117
Sorry.

1248
00:58:49,609 --> 00:58:51,282
Sorry, sorry, sorry.

1249
00:58:52,112 --> 00:58:55,616
Thanks for sending me to that seminar.
it was actually interesting.

1250
00:58:56,116 --> 00:58:57,959
- Really?
- Absolutely.

1251
00:58:58,952 --> 00:59:00,295
What
have you been up to?

1252
00:59:00,495 --> 00:59:01,587
I'm going to go.

1253
00:59:01,705 --> 00:59:02,797
No, no, wait!

1254
00:59:03,165 --> 00:59:05,839
You were here first.
I'll leave. Sorry.

1255
00:59:06,126 --> 00:59:07,799
One thing--quick question.

1256
00:59:08,003 --> 00:59:09,971
If I was to invite
someone out to a really

1257
00:59:10,088 --> 00:59:12,011
nice dinner around here,
where would I go?

1258
00:59:12,340 --> 00:59:13,842
Urn...

1259
00:59:14,301 --> 00:59:17,805
I wouldn't know. I spend
most of my time on campus.

1260
00:59:18,013 --> 00:59:20,141
What? That's criminal!

1261
00:59:20,348 --> 00:59:22,521
Has it occurred to you I
work hard for a reason, hmm?

1262
00:59:23,643 --> 00:59:26,647
This may sound silly to you, but
I believe what we do here...

1263
00:59:26,855 --> 00:59:28,357
...makes people's
lives better.

1264
00:59:28,648 --> 00:59:31,492
That doesn't sound silly.
I think it's admirable.

1265
00:59:31,693 --> 00:59:34,822
I'm just saying that sometimes
with all the work you can...

1266
00:59:35,197 --> 00:59:37,495
...forget about the person
who matters most.

1267
00:59:38,158 --> 00:59:42,208
Is this a nap pod or a convo pod?
Oh, that's right, it's a nap pod.

1268
00:59:42,287 --> 00:59:44,164
Shh!
Yikes.

1269
00:59:44,831 --> 00:59:47,209
- I know where you're going with this.
- You think...

1270
00:59:47,501 --> 00:59:50,550
I'm some 30-year-old exec who
devoted her life to her career.

1271
00:59:50,837 --> 00:59:55,217
And one day I'll wake up wanting more.
Stop me if I'm off base here.

1272
00:59:56,843 --> 00:59:59,687
What else? That I can't
go on Facebook anymore...

1273
00:59:59,888 --> 01:00:01,890
because it's only happy
couples gloating over

1274
01:00:01,973 --> 01:00:04,692
perfect babies in socks
that look like sneakers?

1275
01:00:04,893 --> 01:00:06,895
Oh, yeah,
the little Chuck Taylors.

1276
01:00:07,187 --> 01:00:09,189
Only I'm ten years too late.
While I've been

1277
01:00:09,356 --> 01:00:11,404
working, I missed
out on the bad dates...

1278
01:00:11,691 --> 01:00:14,035
...and assholes and now
I'm running out of time.

1279
01:00:15,195 --> 01:00:17,493
No one told me it was a
game of musical chairs.

1280
01:00:17,572 --> 01:00:20,200
By the time I figured
it out, it was too late.

1281
01:00:20,408 --> 01:00:21,830
Yeah.

1282
01:00:23,036 --> 01:00:24,208
Anyway...

1283
01:00:25,705 --> 01:00:29,050
Anyway, is that what
you were going to say to me?

1284
01:00:29,376 --> 01:00:31,424
No. I was going to suggest
you work harder.

1285
01:00:31,711 --> 01:00:34,385
That you buckle down
and get to work.

1286
01:00:34,589 --> 01:00:38,935
You can't change the world while
laying in a nap pod. But honestly...

1287
01:00:39,219 --> 01:00:43,065
...if any of what you just said
applies even slightly to yourself...

1288
01:00:43,265 --> 01:00:45,939
...you might think about
doing something about it.

1289
01:00:46,226 --> 01:00:47,899
That's coming from someone...

1290
01:00:48,103 --> 01:00:51,778
...who wakes up in the morning, and first
thing on their calendar is regret.

1291
01:00:52,065 --> 01:00:53,908
And that's
not a good feeling.

1292
01:00:57,279 --> 01:00:58,781
Anyway, I should go.

1293
01:00:59,072 --> 01:01:00,073
Thank you!

1294
01:01:00,907 --> 01:01:02,580
But before I do--
Oh, jeez!

1295
01:01:02,909 --> 01:01:06,413
Just bear with me. I want to throw
down a challenge for you...

1296
01:01:06,621 --> 01:01:08,623
...to go out to dinner
before I leave town.

1297
01:01:08,915 --> 01:01:10,963
I'll tell you if
a window opens up.

1298
01:01:11,251 --> 01:01:13,253
Great. And if it does,
don't minimize it.

1299
01:01:13,378 --> 01:01:15,426
Don't click
the red X in the corner.

1300
01:01:15,630 --> 01:01:17,303
See? I'm getting it.

1301
01:01:17,757 --> 01:01:19,100
I get it.

1302
01:01:20,927 --> 01:01:22,929
Shh, go back to sleep.

1303
01:01:29,603 --> 01:01:30,775
Hey, Chetty!

1304
01:01:31,771 --> 01:01:34,445
Pretty good effort
on the Quidditch field, huh?

1305
01:01:34,774 --> 01:01:38,119
It was a game throwing
balls. And you lost.

1306
01:01:38,361 --> 01:01:42,116
But we really rallied in the second half.
Kind of a spiritual victory.

1307
01:01:42,282 --> 01:01:44,705
Perhaps you'll
land a spiritual job.

1308
01:01:45,368 --> 01:01:47,541
You know,
the admissions committee

1309
01:01:47,662 --> 01:01:49,881
was split on you.
You made it by one vote.

1310
01:01:50,123 --> 01:01:52,626
The deciding member thought
you showed promise.

1311
01:01:52,959 --> 01:01:56,133
It's clear now
that he was wrong.

1312
01:01:56,463 --> 01:01:59,467
Sometimes the long shots
pay off the biggest.

1313
01:02:01,468 --> 01:02:02,640
Enjoy your pudding.

1314
01:02:02,761 --> 01:02:03,978
I will.

1315
01:02:04,804 --> 01:02:06,147
Oh! And Chetty?

1316
01:02:06,806 --> 01:02:10,060
Not for nothing-- you can't
get me not to like you.

1317
01:02:17,984 --> 01:02:20,032
Let's take this new
team spirit and apply it

1318
01:02:20,153 --> 01:02:22,247
to this next app challenge.
We got this.

1319
01:02:22,489 --> 01:02:24,332
It'd help
if we had an idea for one.

1320
01:02:24,574 --> 01:02:27,418
You bet your sweet
ass it would, Stewie.

1321
01:02:27,744 --> 01:02:28,916
No. Never Stewie.

1322
01:02:29,162 --> 01:02:31,836
Perimeter breach
acknowledged, Stuart.

1323
01:02:32,082 --> 01:02:34,255
It'll feel good
when he warms up to me.

1324
01:02:34,584 --> 01:02:35,927
It's going to happen.

1325
01:02:36,169 --> 01:02:39,173
I'll break you down like a
two-by-four, bronco. Watch me.

1326
01:02:39,422 --> 01:02:41,265
Let's brainstorm this puppy.

1327
01:02:41,591 --> 01:02:43,844
Put the coffee in the pot
and let it percolate!

1328
01:02:44,094 --> 01:02:46,438
Let's explore what apps
have been most popular.

1329
01:02:46,638 --> 01:02:47,639
Go backwards
to go forwards!

1330
01:02:47,847 --> 01:02:51,021
Oh, and we can bin it. Categorize
needle-movers by user.

1331
01:02:51,101 --> 01:02:52,353
Do what?

1332
01:02:52,435 --> 01:02:54,779
Hit it by function
and user. Two-prong.

1333
01:02:55,021 --> 01:02:56,523
Taking out the shield
generator on the forest moon

1334
01:02:56,606 --> 01:02:58,779
of Endor and fighting
with Admiral Ackbar.

1335
01:02:59,025 --> 01:03:00,368
It's not a trap!

1336
01:03:00,610 --> 01:03:03,284
Guys, I don't want to kill
the momentum or the mojo...

1337
01:03:03,613 --> 01:03:06,958
...but needles and categories,
they don't use apps.

1338
01:03:07,284 --> 01:03:08,661
People use apps.

1339
01:03:08,868 --> 01:03:11,371
So I have an idea.
People take pictures, right?

1340
01:03:11,454 --> 01:03:12,626
They have their phones out,
they see something,

1341
01:03:12,706 --> 01:03:16,427
take it, but then the photo's
just sitting there.

1342
01:03:16,501 --> 01:03:18,219
What if they take that
photo and instantaneously

1343
01:03:18,295 --> 01:03:21,390
put it out on the line and
share it with friends?

1344
01:03:21,464 --> 01:03:23,808
That's Instagram.
it already exists.

1345
01:03:23,883 --> 01:03:25,601
It's one of the most popular
apps in the world.

1346
01:03:25,677 --> 01:03:28,556
Facebook bought it
for a billion dollars.

1347
01:03:28,805 --> 01:03:30,148
Oh, no, no,
mine's very different.

1348
01:03:30,390 --> 01:03:32,233
How is yours
"very different"?

1349
01:03:32,475 --> 01:03:34,773
In mine, you put
the photo out on the line.

1350
01:03:34,853 --> 01:03:36,070
"Online".

1351
01:03:36,146 --> 01:03:37,819
A photo exchange
on the line.

1352
01:03:38,064 --> 01:03:39,065
That's Instagram.

1353
01:03:39,316 --> 01:03:41,410
Mine has social sharing on the line.
Online.

1354
01:03:41,651 --> 01:03:44,746
When you keep saying "on the
line", do you mean "online"?

1355
01:03:44,988 --> 01:03:48,913
Stuart, don't do that! He's got
a million dollar idea there!

1356
01:03:49,159 --> 01:03:50,411
Billion dollar idea.

1357
01:03:50,535 --> 01:03:51,752
Even better! Let him flow.

1358
01:03:51,911 --> 01:03:53,254
You can't bring me down,
I'm too positive.

1359
01:03:53,413 --> 01:03:56,166
Let me share something with you.
Nah.

1360
01:03:56,499 --> 01:03:58,752
Come. I'll explain in
a way that's visual.

1361
01:03:59,002 --> 01:04:00,094
He's bigger than you.
Be careful.

1362
01:04:00,337 --> 01:04:01,714
So you're out there,
you take a photo.

1363
01:04:01,796 --> 01:04:03,719
Pretend. Go ahead.

1364
01:04:05,925 --> 01:04:08,019
So you take that photo,
put it on the line...

1365
01:04:08,094 --> 01:04:09,095
Online.

1366
01:04:09,179 --> 01:04:12,023
Put it on Twitter, whatever you want.
That's lnstagram.

1367
01:04:12,265 --> 01:04:13,687
That is lnstagram.
100%.

1368
01:04:13,933 --> 01:04:14,934
I get it.

1369
01:04:15,018 --> 01:04:16,110
We're not dummies!

1370
01:04:16,186 --> 01:04:18,860
Point taken. Now
let's go with my concept.

1371
01:04:19,189 --> 01:04:22,489
You've taken
a photo instantaneously

1372
01:04:22,567 --> 01:04:24,194
or not instantaneously
and then...

1373
01:04:24,527 --> 01:04:27,451
...you take those and send
those out on the line.

1374
01:04:27,697 --> 01:04:28,698
Online.

1375
01:04:28,948 --> 01:04:32,122
You don't have to say shit!
You just say...

1376
01:04:32,369 --> 01:04:35,464
..."l like that photo" and share
that photo on the line...

1377
01:04:35,705 --> 01:04:36,797
Online.

1378
01:04:37,040 --> 01:04:39,884
Now everyone's
exchanging photos!

1379
01:04:40,126 --> 01:04:43,721
And that's why the photos being
shared on the line will be known...

1380
01:04:44,047 --> 01:04:45,720
...as Exchangeagram!

1381
01:04:45,965 --> 01:04:48,468
Holy shitballs, Billy, we
don't have time for this!

1382
01:04:48,718 --> 01:04:51,562
Hello, fellow interns!
Graham Hawtrey here.

1383
01:04:51,805 --> 01:04:54,228
I've attached
a link to our app...

1384
01:04:54,474 --> 01:04:57,148
...which has already been
downloaded 230 times. Booyah!

1385
01:04:59,229 --> 01:05:01,197
We're going to lose
another challenge.

1386
01:05:01,272 --> 01:05:03,570
We won't get these jobs. Our
lives are basically ruined.

1387
01:05:03,817 --> 01:05:05,990
Hold on.
Your life isn't ruined.

1388
01:05:06,319 --> 01:05:09,414
You guys are 21. You have your
whole life in front of you.

1389
01:05:09,656 --> 01:05:11,408
Do you know what
it's like to be 21 now?

1390
01:05:11,825 --> 01:05:14,499
A quarter of the kids coming
out of college can't get jobs.

1391
01:05:14,744 --> 01:05:17,588
That's correct. Mother says
you can work hard and...

1392
01:05:17,831 --> 01:05:18,753
...go to the right school
but nothing is

1393
01:05:18,832 --> 01:05:21,676
guaranteed anymore.
That's life.

1394
01:05:21,918 --> 01:05:23,261
These guys are right.

1395
01:05:23,503 --> 01:05:25,597
The whole American Dream
thing you guys

1396
01:05:25,672 --> 01:05:28,516
grew up on, that's
all it is now--a dream.

1397
01:05:28,758 --> 01:05:30,510
You're too young
to be this cynical!

1398
01:05:30,677 --> 01:05:32,429
You really see
the world this way?

1399
01:05:32,679 --> 01:05:36,354
That's not how we see it. It's
just the way things are now.

1400
01:05:38,351 --> 01:05:39,853
That's it. Everybody up.

1401
01:05:40,186 --> 01:05:41,859
Breath-of-fresh-air time.

1402
01:05:42,105 --> 01:05:43,448
We have work to do.

1403
01:05:43,523 --> 01:05:45,116
No, no, no, no, no. Uh-uh.
Uh-uh.

1404
01:05:45,191 --> 01:05:49,037
We're taking it to the street.
We'll get our heads right...

1405
01:05:49,279 --> 01:05:50,622
...so we can work
as a team.

1406
01:05:50,864 --> 01:05:52,366
What about the app?
This is bigger than an app.

1407
01:05:52,615 --> 01:05:54,959
And we have
something pretty terrific

1408
01:05:55,034 --> 01:05:56,627
in our back pocket
with Exchangeagram.

1409
01:05:56,870 --> 01:05:58,622
Just let it marinate.

1410
01:05:58,913 --> 01:06:00,256
Yeah, that's a winner.

1411
01:06:00,540 --> 01:06:03,293
Time to light it up
forever and never go to sleep.

1412
01:06:04,294 --> 01:06:06,968
Can we talk about this
online/on the line thing?

1413
01:06:07,130 --> 01:06:08,552
We're gonna
follow the morons.

1414
01:06:20,560 --> 01:06:23,404
...and she says "Wait a
minute, that's not a duck!"

1415
01:06:36,576 --> 01:06:39,580
My friend here says there's a
dance club down the street that's great.

1416
01:06:39,871 --> 01:06:42,715
You're shitting me.
Come on, let's hit it!

1417
01:07:18,743 --> 01:07:20,791
Are you sure
he said "dance club"?

1418
01:07:21,371 --> 01:07:23,794
I was rocking Mandarin,
he was rocking Cantonese.

1419
01:07:23,957 --> 01:07:29,214
Something clearly got confused.
But I say, happy accident.

1420
01:07:31,297 --> 01:07:33,015
Show you to your table?

1421
01:07:37,053 --> 01:07:39,397
Great big world
out there, my friend,

1422
01:07:39,472 --> 01:07:41,600
just three inches up,
I beg you.

1423
01:07:43,893 --> 01:07:45,190
Any questions?

1424
01:07:46,646 --> 01:07:48,114
Oh! Ooh!

1425
01:07:48,481 --> 01:07:51,485
Holy shit, that's deep.

1426
01:07:54,487 --> 01:07:56,660
I think that's
our cue. Here we go.

1427
01:07:57,991 --> 01:07:59,664
Come on!

1428
01:07:59,951 --> 01:08:02,545
This is good. It's totally cool.
It's great. Ahem!

1429
01:08:02,870 --> 01:08:04,167
You okay, firecracker?

1430
01:08:04,539 --> 01:08:07,634
What? Yeah! Totally!
This is my jam.

1431
01:08:08,042 --> 01:08:09,715
This here is my shit.

1432
01:08:10,003 --> 01:08:12,256
I know, but if you
don't want to be here,

1433
01:08:12,338 --> 01:08:15,683
we'll grab the guys by their little
boners and go back on the bus.

1434
01:08:16,009 --> 01:08:19,013
No, no, don't do that.
Don't. It's just...

1435
01:08:19,846 --> 01:08:22,190
...I've only read
about this stuff, okay?

1436
01:08:22,932 --> 01:08:26,357
Craigslist casual encounters.
"Twilight" fan fiction. Hentai.

1437
01:08:26,561 --> 01:08:27,562
What's Hentai?

1438
01:08:28,938 --> 01:08:30,940
Japanese comic books where
women get penetrated

1439
01:08:31,024 --> 01:08:32,196
by octopus tentacles.

1440
01:08:32,609 --> 01:08:34,532
Oh!Ah!

1441
01:08:34,944 --> 01:08:36,287
Look, it's just...

1442
01:08:36,613 --> 01:08:39,287
...I have imagined everything.
It's just...

1443
01:08:39,616 --> 01:08:41,539
...I've never done anything.

1444
01:08:41,618 --> 01:08:43,620
Your secret's safe with us.

1445
01:08:43,953 --> 01:08:48,129
And for what it's worth,
your imagination is so wild...

1446
01:08:48,374 --> 01:08:51,218
...reality will be a breeze,
if not a letdown.

1447
01:08:52,503 --> 01:08:55,052
Thanks. Show you to
your table, cutie?

1448
01:09:15,068 --> 01:09:16,069
BILLY AND NICKI Let's go!

1449
01:09:16,361 --> 01:09:18,034
About time
this group had a night.

1450
01:09:18,237 --> 01:09:20,239
Let the good times roll!

1451
01:09:21,741 --> 01:09:24,415
Here you go.
Bottoms up, Yo-Yo.

1452
01:09:24,744 --> 01:09:25,745
Oh, I can't.

1453
01:09:26,037 --> 01:09:27,539
Why? You're 21, right?

1454
01:09:27,747 --> 01:09:30,626
Yeah, but my morn says
alcohol numbs the brain.

1455
01:09:30,958 --> 01:09:33,507
I'm not saying a shot of
tequila is the first step

1456
01:09:33,586 --> 01:09:35,133
on the journey
to self-respect...

1457
01:09:35,380 --> 01:09:39,726
...but maybe it's a step in
the right direction. Maybe?

1458
01:09:40,968 --> 01:09:42,311
Your call.

1459
01:09:42,553 --> 01:09:43,725
One shot.

1460
01:09:44,722 --> 01:09:45,723
Bang it, Yo!

1461
01:09:47,141 --> 01:09:48,939
To the night
you'll never remember!

1462
01:10:00,780 --> 01:10:02,908
Yeah!

1463
01:10:03,491 --> 01:10:04,834
He's getting down!

1464
01:10:18,840 --> 01:10:20,342
Look what
we got cooking here.

1465
01:10:22,969 --> 01:10:25,813
Exchangeagram
moment, bitches!

1466
01:10:28,725 --> 01:10:30,398
Ready for your
first lap dance?

1467
01:10:30,643 --> 01:10:32,737
Are you kidding?
Yo-Yo stays ready

1468
01:10:32,812 --> 01:10:34,155
so he doesn't
have to get ready.

1469
01:10:34,397 --> 01:10:37,571
This is Tapioca. She's studying
to be a dental assistant.

1470
01:10:37,900 --> 01:10:38,992
Enjoy!

1471
01:10:48,327 --> 01:10:50,079
It happens
all the time.

1472
01:10:50,163 --> 01:10:51,790
Some would say
it's the point.

1473
01:10:56,794 --> 01:10:58,842
It's all good.

1474
01:10:58,921 --> 01:11:02,175
Might want to double up
on the underwear next time.

1475
01:11:06,929 --> 01:11:10,650
I got to tell you, the
reboot time is impressive.

1476
01:11:11,225 --> 01:11:12,522
Trifecta.

1477
01:11:13,186 --> 01:11:14,278
Cheers, bud.

1478
01:11:14,353 --> 01:11:15,479
Cheers, cheers.

1479
01:11:44,008 --> 01:11:45,305
No way!

1480
01:11:45,635 --> 01:11:46,807
Hi.

1481
01:11:47,804 --> 01:11:49,477
Is that your dance
teacher from Google?

1482
01:11:50,640 --> 01:11:51,983
Go talk to her.

1483
01:11:52,308 --> 01:11:55,812
Yeah, fo shizzle,
I'll just go up and I'm like...

1484
01:11:56,062 --> 01:11:57,735
..."Want to join
the Lyle High Club?"

1485
01:11:57,980 --> 01:12:01,075
Lyle, sometimes the most radical
move is to just be yourself.

1486
01:12:02,485 --> 01:12:04,487
And I really like
the real Lyle.

1487
01:12:04,821 --> 01:12:06,073
Yeah?

1488
01:12:06,155 --> 01:12:07,202
Yeah.

1489
01:12:08,157 --> 01:12:09,909
Go on,
you're burning daylight!

1490
01:12:12,912 --> 01:12:14,255
Let's do this.

1491
01:12:22,088 --> 01:12:23,180
Hi.

1492
01:12:23,422 --> 01:12:25,299
Hi.
Hi.

1493
01:12:25,925 --> 01:12:27,643
Hi.
Hi.

1494
01:12:27,760 --> 01:12:29,057
Hi.

1495
01:12:29,136 --> 01:12:32,310
You were really good up there.
I mean, that was amazing!

1496
01:12:32,598 --> 01:12:34,271
Not in like a sexual way.

1497
01:12:34,475 --> 01:12:35,476
Kind of in a sexual way.

1498
01:12:35,768 --> 01:12:40,114
You're very talented. Everything you
do is special is what I'm saying.

1499
01:12:40,314 --> 01:12:42,112
I'm just so embarrassed.

1500
01:12:42,316 --> 01:12:44,819
You're emb-- Are you kidding?
Now we're even...

1501
01:12:45,069 --> 01:12:46,912
...because dancing in
your class at Google was

1502
01:12:46,988 --> 01:12:49,491
one of the most embarrassing
moments of my life.

1503
01:12:50,741 --> 01:12:54,086
If it helps, I don't remember
anything specifically awful.

1504
01:12:54,287 --> 01:12:57,131
Oh, poop.
You don't remember.

1505
01:12:57,415 --> 01:12:59,588
That means we're not even.

1506
01:12:59,792 --> 01:13:03,262
There's only one very
unfortunate way to fix that.

1507
01:13:04,046 --> 01:13:05,798
Oh?

1508
01:13:09,260 --> 01:13:11,638
That is burned in my memory.
You can stop.

1509
01:13:12,096 --> 01:13:16,772
How about I stop if and only
if I can buy you a drink?

1510
01:13:17,435 --> 01:13:19,062
I would love that.

1511
01:13:19,979 --> 01:13:22,152
Yeah'? Shots?
Yeah.

1512
01:13:22,523 --> 01:13:24,321
Yes. Shots.
Shots.

1513
01:14:06,484 --> 01:14:09,283
I love teaching at Google,
but it's only part-time

1514
01:14:09,362 --> 01:14:10,864
and doesn't cover my
tuition, so I augment.

1515
01:14:11,155 --> 01:14:13,874
No, don't augment. You're
perfect the way you are!

1516
01:14:14,784 --> 01:14:15,876
Can I get a dance?

1517
01:14:16,369 --> 01:14:17,541
Not now.
Look, bitch...

1518
01:14:17,954 --> 01:14:19,456
...I don't know
who this geek is,

1519
01:14:19,538 --> 01:14:21,586
but I spent a shitload
of dinero here,

1520
01:14:21,666 --> 01:14:22,667
and I expect to nut.

1521
01:14:23,084 --> 01:14:26,258
Yeah, no, I'm totally
a geek, Biff Tannen.

1522
01:14:26,504 --> 01:14:27,596
Who's Biff Tannen?

1523
01:14:27,838 --> 01:14:30,512
You're Biff from "Back
to the Future", right?

1524
01:14:30,675 --> 01:14:31,676
Want to take
this outside?

1525
01:14:32,009 --> 01:14:34,262
No, I'd rather stay here
and talk to the pretty girl.

1526
01:14:34,512 --> 01:14:35,855
Let's rock, not talk.

1527
01:14:36,013 --> 01:14:37,014
Hey, man.

1528
01:14:37,264 --> 01:14:38,436
Is there a problem?

1529
01:14:38,683 --> 01:14:41,106
It looks like somebody needs
their way older brothers

1530
01:14:41,185 --> 01:14:42,402
to fight for him, huh?

1531
01:14:43,270 --> 01:14:45,614
Oh, it's
the United Colors of Nerd!

1532
01:14:45,940 --> 01:14:47,533
Do you all work together?

1533
01:14:47,775 --> 01:14:49,869
I'm going to go out on a limb
and say it's a tech company.

1534
01:14:49,944 --> 01:14:51,446
Free cereal
and ugly people.

1535
01:14:51,529 --> 01:14:52,576
Oh! Whoa! Hey!

1536
01:14:52,780 --> 01:14:56,080
Come on, take it easy! Is
this the Jets and the Sharks?

1537
01:14:56,367 --> 01:14:57,584
Why don't you guys
head that way

1538
01:14:57,660 --> 01:14:59,788
and we'll head that way and
never the twain shall meet.

1539
01:14:59,870 --> 01:15:00,871
Have a great night.

1540
01:15:01,539 --> 01:15:02,916
That's a good idea.

1541
01:15:19,223 --> 01:15:21,646
My mother hits
harder than you!

1542
01:15:23,769 --> 01:15:25,362
Down goes stranger!

1543
01:15:27,481 --> 01:15:29,324
What's up?
Oh, shit.

1544
01:15:29,650 --> 01:15:31,323
If I see you again,
I'll kill you!

1545
01:15:31,402 --> 01:15:32,995
Hide your kids!
Hide your wife!

1546
01:15:34,155 --> 01:15:35,407
That's how you party!

1547
01:15:38,826 --> 01:15:42,171
We're too hot to party! That's
why they got to kick us out!

1548
01:15:42,413 --> 01:15:44,791
'Cause they're gonna
call the fire department!

1549
01:15:44,957 --> 01:15:46,675
Bring it outside to party!

1550
01:15:48,919 --> 01:15:50,421
Look at that view!

1551
01:15:51,005 --> 01:15:54,726
You're not gonna see that on your 4-inch screen.
You got to look up.

1552
01:15:56,260 --> 01:15:59,890
Buddy, you were an animal
out there tonight!

1553
01:16:00,681 --> 01:16:02,854
You were.
Did you have a good time?

1554
01:16:03,059 --> 01:16:04,732
Yeah, it was all right.

1555
01:16:04,894 --> 01:16:06,567
"It was all right."
Why do you do that?

1556
01:16:06,854 --> 01:16:08,197
What do you mean?
Do what?

1557
01:16:08,856 --> 01:16:11,826
Lowball me like that!
I'm not going to take away...

1558
01:16:11,901 --> 01:16:12,993
...your cool guy card if
you admit you give a shit

1559
01:16:13,069 --> 01:16:17,245
about something or, God
forbid, had a great time.

1560
01:16:20,659 --> 01:16:22,411
Um... All right,
it was fun.

1561
01:16:22,661 --> 01:16:24,004
Stewie...

1562
01:16:24,663 --> 01:16:26,256
What?
Come on!

1563
01:16:26,499 --> 01:16:28,922
You want me to say it was
the best night of my life?

1564
01:16:29,168 --> 01:16:30,841
Only if it's true.

1565
01:16:34,173 --> 01:16:36,267
Okay, it was
the best night of my life.

1566
01:16:37,343 --> 01:16:39,516
My Noogler! Come here!

1567
01:16:39,845 --> 01:16:41,188
My Noogler.

1568
01:16:41,597 --> 01:16:44,350
I don't believe there
hasn't been one boyfriend.

1569
01:16:44,683 --> 01:16:47,527
Nope. That's embarrassing.

1570
01:16:48,187 --> 01:16:51,691
It's nothing to be embarrassed of.
You have plenty of time.

1571
01:16:52,358 --> 01:16:53,951
I mean,
you're the whole package.

1572
01:16:54,777 --> 01:16:57,872
You're beautiful. You're smart.
You have great teeth.

1573
01:16:58,197 --> 01:17:02,873
You do. Unbelievable choppers
on the old girl, I mean it!

1574
01:17:03,202 --> 01:17:05,830
And terrific shoes. I'm
always excited to see

1575
01:17:05,913 --> 01:17:08,211
what kind of get-up you're
going to throw together.

1576
01:17:08,290 --> 01:17:09,337
That part's true.

1577
01:17:09,416 --> 01:17:11,134
It is true. A lot of
great things going on.

1578
01:17:11,377 --> 01:17:14,301
Some guy will find himself
very lucky to be next to you.

1579
01:17:15,047 --> 01:17:16,139
I'm not so sure.

1580
01:17:16,298 --> 01:17:17,390
Well, I am.

1581
01:17:17,716 --> 01:17:19,718
And I've been
around a little bit.

1582
01:17:20,719 --> 01:17:22,062
I'm positive.

1583
01:17:28,227 --> 01:17:31,731
Hot thing, hot
thing Hot thing, what up with it?

1584
01:17:33,065 --> 01:17:36,740
Lyle! Looks like you hit it
off with Saffron tonight.

1585
01:17:37,069 --> 01:17:38,491
I'm texting her
that I love her

1586
01:17:38,654 --> 01:17:40,076
and sending
a picture I just took...

1587
01:17:40,322 --> 01:17:43,496
...of little Lyle when he made pee in the bushes.
Look, he's winking.

1588
01:17:44,410 --> 01:17:48,665
Lyle, that's a horrible idea. Don't do that.
You're drunk off your ass.

1589
01:17:48,914 --> 01:17:52,088
I appreciate your concern, but
I'm flying, baby.

1590
01:17:52,585 --> 01:17:55,589
Lyle, you're not flying.
Look, what's 17 squared?

1591
01:17:55,921 --> 01:17:57,423
289, why?

1592
01:17:57,673 --> 01:18:00,017
Give me a harder
question than that.

1593
01:18:00,259 --> 01:18:02,432
Try, uh, maybe
square root of seventeen.

1594
01:18:02,678 --> 01:18:03,850
4.23 maybe?

1595
01:18:04,680 --> 01:18:08,025
That's the app. That's
the app we should do.

1596
01:18:08,684 --> 01:18:11,813
A quiz question you
have to answer before

1597
01:18:11,896 --> 01:18:13,694
you can send a drunk text or
a drunk email or phone call.

1598
01:18:13,939 --> 01:18:15,941
Something to protect
you from yourself.

1599
01:18:16,192 --> 01:18:17,535
That's good.
Can we do that?

1600
01:18:17,776 --> 01:18:18,777
Hells, yeah!

1601
01:18:19,028 --> 01:18:20,951
Are you shitting me?
I could program

1602
01:18:21,030 --> 01:18:24,034
the shit out of that
on the bus ride home.

1603
01:18:24,283 --> 01:18:26,957
I'll take that as an overwhelming yes!
Come on!

1604
01:18:27,286 --> 01:18:28,287
Let's get back to HQ!

1605
01:18:28,370 --> 01:18:29,462
Wait.

1606
01:18:29,538 --> 01:18:32,792
Let's stay five more minutes.
Enjoy the view a little more.

1607
01:18:34,335 --> 01:18:35,678
NICKI All right.

1608
01:18:36,962 --> 01:18:38,464
Wow. Yeah.

1609
01:18:54,897 --> 01:18:58,401
The whole world looks like
a giant pinwheel of death.

1610
01:18:58,692 --> 01:19:00,535
Price of making
memories, Stewie.

1611
01:19:00,903 --> 01:19:02,905
I think my liver hurts.

1612
01:19:03,239 --> 01:19:05,583
Astonishingly,
your app...

1613
01:19:06,033 --> 01:19:08,877
received ten times more downloads
than any other team's.

1614
01:19:10,537 --> 01:19:12,881
It appears you won
your first challenge.

1615
01:19:13,082 --> 01:19:14,083
How about it?!

1616
01:19:14,708 --> 01:19:15,709
Congratulations.

1617
01:19:15,918 --> 01:19:17,261
Come on, baby!

1618
01:19:17,544 --> 01:19:18,921
The lead!

1619
01:19:20,756 --> 01:19:22,258
Oh, easy there, big guy.

1620
01:19:24,385 --> 01:19:25,887
He gets overexcited.

1621
01:19:26,762 --> 01:19:28,105
Lovely.

1622
01:19:28,931 --> 01:19:30,274
Let it out.

1623
01:19:30,724 --> 01:19:32,101
Let it out, little feller.

1624
01:20:19,148 --> 01:20:21,992
Our Professor X was
way meaner than this guy.

1625
01:20:23,527 --> 01:20:25,200
It wasn't funny at the time.

1626
01:20:33,037 --> 01:20:37,133
What I'm doing is supercharging
my CSS and HTML skills...

1627
01:20:37,374 --> 01:20:39,217
...'cause you can do
both simultaneously.

1628
01:20:39,460 --> 01:20:40,803
HTML5, right?

1629
01:20:41,045 --> 01:20:44,470
That's one step beyond
the HTML5 they mentioned

1630
01:20:44,548 --> 01:20:46,050
the other day with
the CSS3, remember?

1631
01:20:46,258 --> 01:20:47,384
No.

1632
01:20:47,468 --> 01:20:49,721
When writing code,
you have your choice

1633
01:20:49,845 --> 01:20:52,143
of a number of editors,
such as...

1634
01:20:52,389 --> 01:20:54,062
Emacs,
nano and vi, of course.

1635
01:20:54,308 --> 01:20:55,651
What does that mean?

1636
01:20:55,893 --> 01:20:58,737
They have syntax highlighting
and autocomplete. Questions?

1637
01:21:01,565 --> 01:21:04,034
It occurred to me,
why not use Emacs

1638
01:21:04,109 --> 01:21:06,578
rather than vi as the
default editor for Ubuntu?

1639
01:21:07,488 --> 01:21:10,412
That's actually
a very good thought, Nick.

1640
01:21:10,657 --> 01:21:11,749
Thank you.

1641
01:21:11,992 --> 01:21:15,496
Vi versus Emacs is a
constant debate. Moving on.

1642
01:21:30,928 --> 01:21:32,100
Sammy!

1643
01:21:32,930 --> 01:21:34,432
Did you forget an insult?

1644
01:21:34,681 --> 01:21:38,185
Billy, you magnificent son of a bitch!
How's unemployment?

1645
01:21:38,435 --> 01:21:39,607
Come work for me.

1646
01:21:39,853 --> 01:21:41,696
Sammy, I thought
you retired.

1647
01:21:41,939 --> 01:21:46,285
I did, Nicky, but I have stumbled
onto King Solomon's Mines.

1648
01:21:46,610 --> 01:21:48,954
Two words:
motorized scooters.

1649
01:21:49,279 --> 01:21:51,532
Go to Modesto,
check out old age homes.

1650
01:21:51,782 --> 01:21:53,455
Ah, Sammy,
we have a gig.

1651
01:21:53,700 --> 01:21:54,792
We have a new gig.

1652
01:21:54,910 --> 01:21:56,036
We're interns at Google.

1653
01:21:56,370 --> 01:21:58,418
Interns at Google?
Who are you kidding?

1654
01:21:58,497 --> 01:22:01,000
You're salesmen!
This is a sales gig.

1655
01:22:01,208 --> 01:22:02,209
It's a job.

1656
01:22:02,376 --> 01:22:04,720
We've had jobs.
We're building a future.

1657
01:22:05,003 --> 01:22:07,847
And I'm trying to get hard on my
own, but the Cialis is a guarantee.

1658
01:22:08,048 --> 01:22:11,222
You finish this "internship",
who knows what will happen?

1659
01:22:11,510 --> 01:22:13,558
Exactly. Who
knows what will happen'?

1660
01:22:13,846 --> 01:22:15,564
That's what I said.
Why are you repeating me?

1661
01:22:15,848 --> 01:22:17,521
Shh! Time for baby
to go night-night.

1662
01:22:17,724 --> 01:22:19,522
Billy, you're cutting out.

1663
01:22:19,893 --> 01:22:21,236
That felt great.

1664
01:22:25,399 --> 01:22:26,821
I'll catch up
with you later, okay?

1665
01:22:26,942 --> 01:22:28,410
Okay. See you in a bit.

1666
01:22:29,820 --> 01:22:33,324
If this is being a workaholic,
maybe I should get a glass.

1667
01:22:33,574 --> 01:22:36,248
I have fifteen minutes
until my next meeting.

1668
01:22:36,493 --> 01:22:39,337
You know how we were
talking about regret, and--

1669
01:22:39,663 --> 01:22:41,336
You were talking
about regret.

1670
01:22:41,540 --> 01:22:44,714
I don't want to add
not asking you out to

1671
01:22:44,793 --> 01:22:46,545
that list, because that
credit card is maxed out.

1672
01:22:47,004 --> 01:22:50,679
So can we establish you are, in
fact, asking me out on a date?

1673
01:22:51,008 --> 01:22:53,761
Yes. And I figure I'm such
a mountain of mistakes

1674
01:22:53,844 --> 01:22:55,846
that going outwith me
just once this evening...

1675
01:22:56,096 --> 01:22:58,224
...will be like
packing ten years of

1676
01:22:58,348 --> 01:23:00,521
bad experiences
into one night.

1677
01:23:00,809 --> 01:23:01,810
Okay. Fine.

1678
01:23:02,352 --> 01:23:04,025
L-m saying yes Yes?

1679
01:23:04,313 --> 01:23:05,986
Great.
I'm in.

1680
01:23:06,857 --> 01:23:08,029
I'll leave you to it.

1681
01:23:08,317 --> 01:23:09,694
Okay. Tonight.

1682
01:23:15,657 --> 01:23:16,829
Hello, William.

1683
01:23:17,201 --> 01:23:18,202
I've been watching you.

1684
01:23:18,494 --> 01:23:20,997
You should choose your words
more carefully in a bathhouse.

1685
01:23:21,205 --> 01:23:22,878
In the words of Nelly:

1686
01:23:23,540 --> 01:23:25,213
"it's gettin' hot in herre."

1687
01:23:25,876 --> 01:23:27,674
It's getting hot
out there, too.

1688
01:23:27,878 --> 01:23:29,551
You definitely
got my attention.

1689
01:23:29,838 --> 01:23:32,182
Okay, I want to go
put my robe on now.

1690
01:23:32,382 --> 01:23:33,850
Enough to do research on you.

1691
01:23:34,718 --> 01:23:36,720
What did we find out?
Let's see.

1692
01:23:37,054 --> 01:23:41,059
Your company was shut down,
your home was foreclosed upon...

1693
01:23:41,391 --> 01:23:43,735
...your credit score
is actually negative.

1694
01:23:44,019 --> 01:23:46,898
That's kind of amazing,
Billy. That's hard to do.

1695
01:23:47,397 --> 01:23:50,742
You try hard, McMahon.
I'll give you that.

1696
01:23:51,568 --> 01:23:54,412
But things never quite
work out for you, do they?

1697
01:23:54,738 --> 01:23:57,708
I could waste my energy
trying to beat you.

1698
01:23:57,908 --> 01:24:02,914
But it seems, given enough time,
you always find a way to fail.

1699
01:24:03,914 --> 01:24:05,587
I just need to
get out of your way.

1700
01:24:06,250 --> 01:24:07,752
So this is me going.

1701
01:24:12,214 --> 01:24:14,057
Only two challenges remain.

1702
01:24:14,258 --> 01:24:16,556
After which,
a mere handful of you

1703
01:24:16,677 --> 01:24:18,930
will be offered
full-time employment.

1704
01:24:19,429 --> 01:24:22,774
The next challenge is manning
the Google helpline.

1705
01:24:23,100 --> 01:24:25,603
This is one of the most
difficult jobs we have...

1706
01:24:25,936 --> 01:24:30,237
...combining both customer
relations and product fluency.

1707
01:24:30,774 --> 01:24:33,448
You will be judged on both.

1708
01:24:33,735 --> 01:24:35,078
This...

1709
01:24:35,445 --> 01:24:38,449
...is a very tight
race right now.

1710
01:24:41,410 --> 01:24:42,957
I suggest
you study up.

1711
01:24:46,790 --> 01:24:48,007
Okay, let's drill it
and kill it.

1712
01:24:48,083 --> 01:24:51,087
Authorization failure
with Google Drive. Neha.

1713
01:24:51,336 --> 01:24:53,509
Permission's probably
changed. Request access.

1714
01:24:53,755 --> 01:24:55,757
Barn!
Chrome connectivity. Nick.

1715
01:24:56,008 --> 01:24:58,010
Unselect proxy
server for your LAN.

1716
01:24:58,260 --> 01:25:00,934
Nice! Billy, I'm locked out
of my Google Wallet account.

1717
01:25:01,179 --> 01:25:02,681
Is that under
Gmail or Wallet Help?

1718
01:25:02,931 --> 01:25:05,855
"I don't know, sir. That's kind
of what I called you for."

1719
01:25:06,184 --> 01:25:10,360
Look, I'm terrific on phones. I can
sell prosciutto to a rabbi, and I have.

1720
01:25:10,606 --> 01:25:12,199
But you're not
selling anything.

1721
01:25:12,441 --> 01:25:14,785
You can't bullshit
your way through this one.

1722
01:25:15,027 --> 01:25:18,372
The only way to nail this
challenge is to study.

1723
01:25:18,614 --> 01:25:20,787
Then study up is
what I'm going to do.

1724
01:25:22,200 --> 01:25:25,704
Let me ask you, is there a
blanket statement I could say...

1725
01:25:25,954 --> 01:25:28,457
...that could apply to
literally anything?

1726
01:25:28,707 --> 01:25:30,425
And then I either
shove product down

1727
01:25:30,500 --> 01:25:33,549
their face or give
them another hotline.

1728
01:25:33,795 --> 01:25:37,140
You're tech support, so if you
refer them to another number...

1729
01:25:37,382 --> 01:25:40,977
...your phone will ring again, 'cause
it's your number you referred to.

1730
01:25:41,219 --> 01:25:44,894
I'm suggesting, give me the blanket
thing, so I'm not wrong or right...

1731
01:25:45,140 --> 01:25:48,815
...then I either hit them with a real
helpline or push some product on them.

1732
01:25:49,061 --> 01:25:50,984
I can shove product
down their throat.

1733
01:25:51,229 --> 01:25:54,824
You're working too hard. All you have
to do is click the button and read.

1734
01:25:56,485 --> 01:25:57,486
I got it.

1735
01:25:57,736 --> 01:25:59,409
Barn! Done. Read it.

1736
01:25:59,738 --> 01:26:01,490
I got it. I'll do it.

1737
01:26:01,740 --> 01:26:03,413
That's my man, Bill.

1738
01:26:03,742 --> 01:26:05,085
You'll get it.

1739
01:26:10,916 --> 01:26:13,169
Is it just me,
or is this food incredible?

1740
01:26:13,752 --> 01:26:14,753
You're a liar.

1741
01:26:15,170 --> 01:26:16,296
What?

1742
01:26:16,421 --> 01:26:17,593
You were supposed
to be an asshole.

1743
01:26:18,590 --> 01:26:19,682
Come on!

1744
01:26:19,925 --> 01:26:22,098
You were supposed
to pack a decade of

1745
01:26:22,177 --> 01:26:24,930
jerks and bad
dates into one night.

1746
01:26:25,263 --> 01:26:26,264
Remember?

1747
01:26:26,348 --> 01:26:27,440
Now I remember, yes.

1748
01:26:27,516 --> 01:26:30,690
But so far you've
been...totally fine.

1749
01:26:30,936 --> 01:26:32,028
Totally fine?

1750
01:26:32,562 --> 01:26:33,688
Wah-wah.

1751
01:26:33,939 --> 01:26:37,944
I have dropped the ball. I
promised that and didn't deliver.

1752
01:26:38,193 --> 01:26:39,945
Can we get
the check, please?

1753
01:26:40,195 --> 01:26:41,538
May we get the check...
Jennifer?

1754
01:26:41,655 --> 01:26:43,032
How'd you know my...?

1755
01:26:43,281 --> 01:26:45,534
It says right here on
this little necklace.

1756
01:26:45,784 --> 01:26:47,957
And now I have the name,
how about the number?

1757
01:26:48,203 --> 01:26:51,207
Oh, I'm just kidding. Or maybe
I'm not kidding.

1758
01:26:51,623 --> 01:26:54,297
You're so cute. Beautiful.

1759
01:26:55,043 --> 01:26:56,636
Did you just hit
on the waitress?

1760
01:26:56,712 --> 01:26:59,807
I did, yes!
The lady asked for a jerk

1761
01:26:59,881 --> 01:27:02,304
and I am trying to
live up to my promise.

1762
01:27:02,801 --> 01:27:06,897
I said ten years of assholes.
You have some ground to cover.

1763
01:27:07,139 --> 01:27:09,141
I think you've
had enough dessert.

1764
01:27:09,474 --> 01:27:11,147
I've been watching
you eat all night.

1765
01:27:11,393 --> 01:27:14,897
I'll take care of this. You
have to watch your figure...

1766
01:27:14,980 --> 01:27:16,152
and you're right
on the borderline.

1767
01:27:16,231 --> 01:27:17,904
You know what they say,

1768
01:27:17,983 --> 01:27:19,735
"A moment on the lips,
forever on the hips."

1769
01:27:19,985 --> 01:27:23,740
Mmm! This is divine! Oh, you do
not know what you are missing.

1770
01:27:23,989 --> 01:27:25,662
That's nice.

1771
01:27:25,907 --> 01:27:29,787
Here's something you aren't missing-- the check.
I paid for the cab.

1772
01:27:36,209 --> 01:27:37,381
Bullshit!
Right?

1773
01:27:37,586 --> 01:27:39,429
Wow, a little heart
and everything.

1774
01:27:41,089 --> 01:27:43,433
Why don't you
take care of that?

1775
01:27:43,508 --> 01:27:45,602
The night is still young. I'm
taking you to see some dogfights.

1776
01:27:45,844 --> 01:27:48,313
Rock and roll! I think
we're up to five years.

1777
01:27:48,430 --> 01:27:50,899
All right.

1778
01:27:51,099 --> 01:27:52,100
I'll get this.

1779
01:27:52,267 --> 01:27:53,610
Oh!

1780
01:27:53,685 --> 01:27:55,028
That's amazing!

1781
01:28:00,275 --> 01:28:04,200
"In Gmail, a 'bad request'
message shows if..."

1782
01:28:04,863 --> 01:28:06,206
"...shows if..."

1783
01:28:06,531 --> 01:28:08,033
"...your Internet is down."

1784
01:28:09,618 --> 01:28:10,915
Son of a bitch!

1785
01:28:10,994 --> 01:28:12,166
It shows--

1786
01:28:12,245 --> 01:28:14,748
Jesus Christ! You scared
the shit out of me!

1787
01:28:15,207 --> 01:28:18,882
--If your browser has
a bad or outdated cookie.

1788
01:28:20,545 --> 01:28:21,888
Wait, you could...
Hmm?

1789
01:28:23,381 --> 01:28:28,228
Yes, I can hear everything. I'm not
actually listening to anything.

1790
01:28:28,470 --> 01:28:30,472
It allows me to
be with myself.

1791
01:28:30,889 --> 01:28:33,563
I'm not very good
with other humans.

1792
01:28:38,021 --> 01:28:39,694
I'm not very good
with Gmail support.

1793
01:28:39,981 --> 01:28:42,075
No, actually,
you're quite horrible.

1794
01:28:43,693 --> 01:28:46,697
You can do this.
This can be learned.

1795
01:28:47,030 --> 01:28:48,703
But those kids...

1796
01:28:49,032 --> 01:28:53,538
...the way they look at you--
you have a way with people.

1797
01:28:57,707 --> 01:28:59,209
That's a lost art.

1798
01:28:59,876 --> 01:29:01,048
Go again.

1799
01:29:01,711 --> 01:29:02,883
Go again.

1800
01:29:03,547 --> 01:29:05,220
"In Chrome..."

1801
01:29:06,716 --> 01:29:10,186
For you, this is like teaching a
little kid the alphabet, right?

1802
01:29:10,387 --> 01:29:15,393
No, actually, it's like teaching
a kid a letter. Just one letter.

1803
01:29:16,184 --> 01:29:19,188
Your strong point would not
be communicating to humans.

1804
01:29:19,688 --> 01:29:21,031
I know.

1805
01:29:27,237 --> 01:29:31,583
All right, that's my guy. Give it to me straight.
I like it. No chaser.

1806
01:29:31,867 --> 01:29:32,868
We're having fun.

1807
01:29:33,034 --> 01:29:34,081
I am. I hope you are.

1808
01:29:58,101 --> 01:30:01,776
Well, thank you.
That was really awful.

1809
01:30:02,439 --> 01:30:04,282
Ah! You're welcome.
I aim to please.

1810
01:30:04,608 --> 01:30:07,077
I told you I'd
deliver on ten years of

1811
01:30:07,193 --> 01:30:09,616
assholes. I think
I did a pretty good job.

1812
01:30:09,946 --> 01:30:12,290
A little bit too
convincing at times.

1813
01:30:12,532 --> 01:30:14,375
Was it?
That doesn't surprise me.

1814
01:30:14,618 --> 01:30:16,461
When you've been
out there as long as

1815
01:30:16,578 --> 01:30:18,455
I have,
you learn to play the game.

1816
01:30:18,705 --> 01:30:21,049
Oh, I'd be out there,
laying my rap. I'd have

1817
01:30:21,166 --> 01:30:23,544
girls literally thinking
I was an astronomer.

1818
01:30:23,793 --> 01:30:28,299
I'd be pointing out
constellations and harvest moons.

1819
01:30:28,548 --> 01:30:30,221
"Oh, there's Pluto!"

1820
01:30:30,467 --> 01:30:33,141
Then they'd start to fact
check you with the Internet.

1821
01:30:33,803 --> 01:30:37,228
Google singlehandedly cut
into my ability to bullshit.

1822
01:30:37,557 --> 01:30:38,809
Cramping your style?

1823
01:30:38,934 --> 01:30:40,231
Big time.

1824
01:30:40,477 --> 01:30:42,320
Making you a better person?

1825
01:30:42,812 --> 01:30:46,988
True. Ninety percent Google,
ten percent you.

1826
01:30:47,984 --> 01:30:49,986
Just ten percent? Really?

1827
01:30:50,320 --> 01:30:52,322
Let's call it
twenty percent.

1828
01:30:57,160 --> 01:30:58,833
You know, um...

1829
01:31:01,748 --> 01:31:04,092
...I really didn't
expect to like you.

1830
01:31:06,628 --> 01:31:08,801
I didn't think
you'd like me, either.

1831
01:31:17,305 --> 01:31:18,648
Thank you.

1832
01:31:24,145 --> 01:31:26,489
That was my ride home.

1833
01:31:28,817 --> 01:31:30,160
I know.

1834
01:31:40,328 --> 01:31:43,332
Good morning.
Welcome to the Google Helpline.

1835
01:31:43,623 --> 01:31:46,627
You will man the phones for one hour.
Before you begin...

1836
01:31:46,835 --> 01:31:50,009
I'm so ready for this thing.
I was up all night studying.

1837
01:31:50,338 --> 01:31:52,340
This is where Team Lyle
takes the lead.

1838
01:31:52,632 --> 01:31:55,055
--The log file icon,
accessing your account,

1839
01:31:55,176 --> 01:31:57,645
so we can review
your work later.

1840
01:31:58,847 --> 01:32:00,349
The Helpline...

1841
01:32:01,141 --> 01:32:02,188
...is open.

1842
01:32:02,684 --> 01:32:05,528
Google Helpline. My name's Billy.
How can I help you?

1843
01:32:05,812 --> 01:32:07,860
So you're locked
out of your Gmail.

1844
01:32:07,981 --> 01:32:10,029
Well, the good news
is Uncle Bill here...

1845
01:32:10,316 --> 01:32:11,818
...has a key under the mat.

1846
01:32:12,027 --> 01:32:15,031
I'm going to play a hunch here.
Delete all your cookies.

1847
01:32:15,363 --> 01:32:17,536
Did that work? Great.

1848
01:32:17,866 --> 01:32:21,086
You probably have too many
Gmails open at the same time.

1849
01:32:21,286 --> 01:32:23,630
Go ahead and
close a couple and--

1850
01:32:23,872 --> 01:32:27,547
Okay, great. Thank you.
Call with anything else.

1851
01:32:28,043 --> 01:32:30,967
Not a problem. You want to
click on the gear icon,

1852
01:32:31,046 --> 01:32:32,548
then Settings,
then Advanced Settings.

1853
01:32:32,797 --> 01:32:35,892
Yeah, you can have the same tabs
open across all your devices.

1854
01:32:36,134 --> 01:32:38,262
So the browser
windows keep opening

1855
01:32:38,386 --> 01:32:40,559
and you're telling me
that's from Amazon?

1856
01:32:40,805 --> 01:32:42,148
You need anti-virus software.

1857
01:32:42,390 --> 01:32:45,564
Let's fix that before the wife
gets home-- am I making sense?

1858
01:32:45,810 --> 01:32:48,484
Sign into Google Wallet
and update your credit card.

1859
01:32:49,147 --> 01:32:50,148
That's the problem.

1860
01:32:50,398 --> 01:32:51,900
Switching time
zones causes a Calendar

1861
01:32:52,067 --> 01:32:53,569
sync issue.
Are you on vacation?

1862
01:32:53,902 --> 01:32:54,903
Miami, nice.

1863
01:32:55,153 --> 01:32:56,826
Let's get your cache
cleared up, then I'll

1864
01:32:56,905 --> 01:32:59,658
talk you through the best
Cuban spots in town.

1865
01:32:59,908 --> 01:33:01,581
Google Helpline,
this is Graham.

1866
01:33:01,826 --> 01:33:03,999
Your device isn't compatible
with Google Play.

1867
01:33:04,245 --> 01:33:06,748
I want you out there
salsa-ing and grinding up...

1868
01:33:07,082 --> 01:33:10,507
...against a complete stranger,
having a good time

1869
01:33:10,585 --> 01:33:12,087
doing the wrong things.
Are we on the same page?

1870
01:33:12,420 --> 01:33:15,765
See the box at the bottom of your window?
Click it twice.

1871
01:33:16,091 --> 01:33:18,890
Come on, baby, let me
hear you do that conga

1872
01:33:18,968 --> 01:33:20,936
You know you can't
control it any longer

1873
01:33:21,262 --> 01:33:22,263
Time's up!

1874
01:33:22,514 --> 01:33:25,188
So soon? I was
just getting warmed up!

1875
01:33:25,433 --> 01:33:26,776
Good going here!

1876
01:33:27,060 --> 01:33:28,778
Whoo! Come on,
Ladybug!

1877
01:33:29,604 --> 01:33:33,234
Please submit your log files so
I may review your work later.

1878
01:33:33,608 --> 01:33:35,952
Happily. Just click
the blue button.

1879
01:33:36,277 --> 01:33:37,369
Where's that?

1880
01:33:37,487 --> 01:33:38,579
Blue button, upper left.

1881
01:33:38,780 --> 01:33:42,125
Mine's not blue, it's grey.
I can't click it.

1882
01:33:42,450 --> 01:33:43,451
The blue one.

1883
01:33:43,535 --> 01:33:44,536
Mine won't click.
It's grey.

1884
01:33:44,786 --> 01:33:45,912
Is anyone else's grey?

1885
01:33:46,121 --> 01:33:48,123
Did you not hear
my opening remarks?

1886
01:33:48,456 --> 01:33:50,129
Most of them.

1887
01:33:50,416 --> 01:33:52,293
I was getting in the zone.

1888
01:33:52,585 --> 01:33:55,304
I was very clear that
you have to log into

1889
01:33:55,380 --> 01:33:57,599
your account so I could
review your work later.

1890
01:33:58,800 --> 01:34:01,144
The good news is
you reviewed my work now.

1891
01:34:01,427 --> 01:34:02,895
You don't need
the instant replay

1892
01:34:03,012 --> 01:34:04,480
because you saw
the touchdown live.

1893
01:34:05,265 --> 01:34:08,314
I don't really understand that
analogy, but I do know...

1894
01:34:08,601 --> 01:34:11,775
...attention to detail is of
paramount importance here...

1895
01:34:11,980 --> 01:34:14,153
...and my instructions
were explicit.

1896
01:34:14,482 --> 01:34:16,155
If there is no recording...

1897
01:34:16,442 --> 01:34:18,991
it's as if you
didn't even show up today.

1898
01:34:21,489 --> 01:34:23,491
Except I did show up.
I'm right here.

1899
01:34:23,783 --> 01:34:27,504
Well, according to
your log, you're not.

1900
01:34:28,163 --> 01:34:30,837
And since every
intern must complete...

1901
01:34:31,124 --> 01:34:34,344
...the challenge in order
for your team to be scored...

1902
01:34:35,003 --> 01:34:36,346
...your team...

1903
01:34:36,838 --> 01:34:40,012
...will unfortunately receive
a score...of zero.

1904
01:34:41,301 --> 01:34:42,473
Zero?

1905
01:34:44,179 --> 01:34:46,181
Well done, Mr. McMahon.

1906
01:34:46,681 --> 01:34:49,355
Perhaps more studying,
less pudding.

1907
01:34:49,642 --> 01:34:51,895
Chetty, come on.
You're not going to trip

1908
01:34:52,020 --> 01:34:54,318
us up with a technicality.
He's right here.

1909
01:34:54,564 --> 01:34:57,067
Oh, Billy, Billy.
What have you done?

1910
01:34:57,317 --> 01:34:59,319
It's you lot I feel bad for.

1911
01:34:59,569 --> 01:35:01,242
It's really hard
to get here.

1912
01:35:01,571 --> 01:35:03,244
You're probably
pretty intelligent.

1913
01:35:03,740 --> 01:35:05,242
You deserve better.

1914
01:35:05,575 --> 01:35:06,747
I'm sorry.

1915
01:35:09,579 --> 01:35:12,253
It's all right,
El Niño, we'll get them.

1916
01:35:16,419 --> 01:35:18,421
I studied for the test.

1917
01:35:23,760 --> 01:35:25,933
Great.
Another win for Team Graham.

1918
01:35:26,179 --> 01:35:27,431
There's only
one challenge left.

1919
01:35:27,555 --> 01:35:28,852
Even if we're perfect,
it won't be enough.

1920
01:35:29,098 --> 01:35:30,099
We had them, too.

1921
01:35:30,350 --> 01:35:33,945
We did, but it's just a little
hiccup, a little adversity.

1922
01:35:34,270 --> 01:35:36,739
Nick, come on.
Billy's a great guy,

1923
01:35:36,856 --> 01:35:39,279
but he kind of
blew it for us today.

1924
01:35:40,026 --> 01:35:41,278
They're right, Nick.

1925
01:35:42,070 --> 01:35:44,744
I just wanted to come
by and let you know...

1926
01:35:44,822 --> 01:35:47,746
I did study last night, I tried my best.
It's just...

1927
01:35:47,825 --> 01:35:50,829
...that today on the phones...
It's my fault.

1928
01:35:50,995 --> 01:35:51,996
And, uh...

1929
01:35:53,164 --> 01:35:55,417
...he was right when he
said you deserved better.

1930
01:35:55,833 --> 01:35:57,801
I'm really sorry
that I cost you.

1931
01:36:07,262 --> 01:36:08,514
Damn.

1932
01:36:13,059 --> 01:36:14,402
Billy, stop!

1933
01:36:14,644 --> 01:36:16,317
I'm not helping
anybody here.

1934
01:36:16,562 --> 01:36:19,156
What do you mean?
You're helping those kids!

1935
01:36:19,649 --> 01:36:21,492
Where are you going?

1936
01:36:21,734 --> 01:36:23,657
You going
radio silence on me?

1937
01:36:23,903 --> 01:36:26,577
I'm not letting you ride away
from the Garden of Eden!

1938
01:36:26,823 --> 01:36:28,166
I let down the team!

1939
01:36:28,408 --> 01:36:32,163
You didn't letdown the team! Who
cares if you made a mistake?

1940
01:36:32,412 --> 01:36:34,255
I'm not taking
everyone down with me.

1941
01:36:34,497 --> 01:36:37,842
Billy, give me a chance to turn
you with a sports metaphor.

1942
01:36:38,167 --> 01:36:40,670
Damn it, Nick, it's the
best thing for everybody!

1943
01:36:41,004 --> 01:36:43,507
Stop dragging me down
with all your horseshit!

1944
01:36:43,840 --> 01:36:47,344
You're doing great here,
okay? I'm not! I got it!

1945
01:36:48,511 --> 01:36:50,013
Just get off my back.

1946
01:36:50,263 --> 01:36:53,358
How dare you!
How dare you!

1947
01:36:53,683 --> 01:36:56,857
Shame on you!
Put this badge back on!

1948
01:36:57,145 --> 01:36:59,273
If you're going to quit,
quit, but don't

1949
01:36:59,397 --> 01:37:01,525
give me this crap that
it's better for them!

1950
01:37:02,150 --> 01:37:04,152
Come on, Billy!

1951
01:37:25,506 --> 01:37:26,507
Randy?

1952
01:37:27,550 --> 01:37:31,726
I'm Billy McMahon. Sammy sent me?
I'm the new salesman.

1953
01:37:33,723 --> 01:37:35,225
No shit!

1954
01:37:35,558 --> 01:37:37,401
My new partner.

1955
01:37:37,977 --> 01:37:39,900
Ladies and
gentlemen, it has been...

1956
01:37:40,146 --> 01:37:41,648
...an impressive summer.

1957
01:37:42,398 --> 01:37:45,072
One final challenge remains.

1958
01:37:45,902 --> 01:37:47,245
Sales.

1959
01:37:47,653 --> 01:37:49,747
Over a million
companies advertise

1960
01:37:49,906 --> 01:37:52,000
with Google.
Find one that doesn't.

1961
01:37:52,241 --> 01:37:53,242
Convince them.

1962
01:37:53,493 --> 01:37:55,416
The bigger the sale,
the more chance

1963
01:37:55,578 --> 01:37:57,501
you have of taking
this competition.

1964
01:37:57,914 --> 01:37:59,336
The winner will
be announced at our

1965
01:37:59,415 --> 01:38:02,259
final meeting this
afternoon. Good luck.

1966
01:38:02,585 --> 01:38:03,757
Happy hunting!

1967
01:38:04,087 --> 01:38:05,088
On me!

1968
01:38:11,427 --> 01:38:15,432
Sales--done! Those other
bitches are going down!

1969
01:38:15,765 --> 01:38:16,937
Where's Billy?

1970
01:38:17,058 --> 01:38:18,275
He left.

1971
01:38:19,268 --> 01:38:22,693
You heard him. He thought
he was holding us back

1972
01:38:22,772 --> 01:38:24,069
and he didn't want
to talk about it.

1973
01:38:24,690 --> 01:38:26,033
We got to get him back.

1974
01:38:26,275 --> 01:38:28,277
We're a team--you
guys taught us that.

1975
01:38:28,528 --> 01:38:31,873
It was buried under a mountain
of obscure 80s references...

1976
01:38:32,115 --> 01:38:33,788
...and just a ton of...

1977
01:38:34,033 --> 01:38:36,627
...other super
inappropriate bullshit

1978
01:38:36,702 --> 01:38:38,454
I guess was
intended as life lessons...

1979
01:38:38,704 --> 01:38:41,878
...but you did teach us
how to come together, Nick.

1980
01:38:42,125 --> 01:38:45,800
The problem is, when he makes
up his mind on something...

1981
01:38:46,045 --> 01:38:48,889
...Billy has a tendency
to really dig in.

1982
01:38:49,465 --> 01:38:51,308
We may have to do
this without him.

1983
01:38:51,551 --> 01:38:52,643
But, Nick...

1984
01:38:53,052 --> 01:38:55,475
...we wouldn't want to.
Right, guys?

1985
01:39:02,061 --> 01:39:03,062
Hey, Tony!

1986
01:39:04,480 --> 01:39:06,824
Slow it down, man.
Just kidding.

1987
01:39:07,817 --> 01:39:09,490
How long you
worked this territory?

1988
01:39:09,819 --> 01:39:11,162
Three years.

1989
01:39:11,487 --> 01:39:14,832
It's great-- you build a
relationship with the customer.

1990
01:39:15,241 --> 01:39:17,369
Then they die.

1991
01:39:17,452 --> 01:39:22,458
You resell scooters with 25, 35 miles
on them, tops. Everybody wins!

1992
01:39:23,332 --> 01:39:25,334
Hey! Look who's back!

1993
01:39:25,668 --> 01:39:27,011
Hey, Randy!

1994
01:39:30,256 --> 01:39:31,428
Hey, old timer.

1995
01:39:31,674 --> 01:39:33,176
Hey, Randy.

1996
01:39:33,509 --> 01:39:34,852
What do you want?

1997
01:39:35,344 --> 01:39:38,518
Treat them like shit--
makes them want you more.

1998
01:39:39,182 --> 01:39:41,025
Everybody, listen up!

1999
01:39:41,350 --> 01:39:43,193
This is my new
tail gunner, Billy!

2000
01:39:43,436 --> 01:39:46,781
Billy, tell them about that
sweet ride you pulled up on.

2001
01:39:47,023 --> 01:39:49,367
Oh, you mean
the brand new X-70.

2002
01:39:49,692 --> 01:39:52,787
It has an eight-hour
motor, and a

2003
01:39:52,862 --> 01:39:54,705
rear-mounted stainless
sleeve for your oxy tank.

2004
01:39:55,072 --> 01:39:57,621
You have no idea how much
boning goes on here.

2005
01:39:57,867 --> 01:40:01,713
It's amazing. Check this one
out-- Ethel, that's her name.

2006
01:40:02,038 --> 01:40:03,756
She calls my junk
the "cocoon".

2007
01:40:03,831 --> 01:40:05,378
Says it makes her
feel younger.

2008
01:40:05,625 --> 01:40:08,128
Lowered her blood pressure.
I'm not fighting it.

2009
01:40:08,377 --> 01:40:11,051
I'm a life-giver and
a lovemaker. Ethel!

2010
01:40:11,380 --> 01:40:12,552
Ethel!

2011
01:40:13,049 --> 01:40:15,723
What's up, girl? Look who's back!

2012
01:40:16,552 --> 01:40:18,225
Come here, boo.
Who's your friend?

2013
01:40:18,804 --> 01:40:20,056
Billy!

2014
01:40:20,556 --> 01:40:22,149
What are you doing here?

2015
01:40:22,391 --> 01:40:23,938
What are you doing here?

2016
01:40:24,227 --> 01:40:25,900
Billy!
Hi.

2017
01:40:26,229 --> 01:40:29,733
Ethel and Doris tell me they're
up for a little group play.

2018
01:40:29,982 --> 01:40:31,325
Can I count you in?

2019
01:40:32,652 --> 01:40:34,404
What the shit?

2020
01:40:35,404 --> 01:40:37,907
Uh... I'm sorry. Randy, this
is my old partner, Nick.

2021
01:40:38,157 --> 01:40:40,831
Nick, this is my
new partner, Randy.

2022
01:40:42,245 --> 01:40:43,747
Welcome to the jungle, ese.

2023
01:40:44,580 --> 01:40:46,082
Billy, can I count you in?

2024
01:40:46,582 --> 01:40:47,754
Give me a second here.

2025
01:40:47,917 --> 01:40:49,089
No problem.

2026
01:40:49,335 --> 01:40:50,336
What are you doing?

2027
01:40:50,503 --> 01:40:51,675
New partner, huh?

2028
01:40:51,796 --> 01:40:53,013
I'm a salesman.
I sell things.

2029
01:40:53,256 --> 01:40:56,931
I remember another guy
who was selling mattresses...

2030
01:40:57,176 --> 01:41:01,181
...when in walks this behemoth! Big guy.
Big mouth. Big dreams.

2031
01:41:01,430 --> 01:41:03,478
He made this old
son of a gun remember

2032
01:41:03,599 --> 01:41:05,693
dreams are still
floating around out there.

2033
01:41:05,935 --> 01:41:07,687
You just got to
reach out and grab them.

2034
01:41:07,937 --> 01:41:11,282
I reached for my dreams.
I messed it up for everybody.

2035
01:41:11,524 --> 01:41:15,700
You forgot to click a button!
You're not a computer wizard!

2036
01:41:15,945 --> 01:41:17,117
You're also not a pussy.

2037
01:41:17,280 --> 01:41:21,626
You're tough. You grew up in the 70s.
There weren't any computers!

2038
01:41:21,867 --> 01:41:25,963
Or bike helmets or sunscreens or seatbelts.
Did you wear a seatbelt?

2039
01:41:26,289 --> 01:41:27,290
No.

2040
01:41:27,456 --> 01:41:28,457
What was your seatbelt?

2041
01:41:29,292 --> 01:41:30,384
My mom went like this.

2042
01:41:30,626 --> 01:41:33,300
Yeah. And how
did that work out?

2043
01:41:33,713 --> 01:41:34,885
You know. I went
through the windshield.

2044
01:41:35,172 --> 01:41:36,389
Eighty-nine stitches.

2045
01:41:36,465 --> 01:41:38,684
You looked like a little
badass in third grade.

2046
01:41:39,010 --> 01:41:41,684
And were you afraid to get
back in that station wagon?

2047
01:41:41,887 --> 01:41:43,730
Nah.
Five years later...

2048
01:41:44,140 --> 01:41:47,644
...you took out that same car,
without permission from nobody.

2049
01:41:47,852 --> 01:41:50,105
Not your parents,
not Old Man Law.

2050
01:41:50,313 --> 01:41:53,567
Just you and Sally Moran,
parked at the point,

2051
01:41:53,649 --> 01:41:55,526
finger-blasting away!

2052
01:41:55,818 --> 01:41:57,866
Didn't even know
if you were doing it right!

2053
01:41:58,237 --> 01:41:59,910
Where are you
going with this?

2054
01:42:00,239 --> 01:42:03,118
I'm saying life is
that station wagon, okay?

2055
01:42:03,367 --> 01:42:06,337
Yeah, sometimes it's going to
throw you through the windshield

2056
01:42:06,412 --> 01:42:08,039
and crack your skull open.

2057
01:42:08,289 --> 01:42:09,632
Maybe even break your heart.

2058
01:42:09,874 --> 01:42:13,629
But every once in a while, it
drops a Sally Moran in your seat.

2059
01:42:13,878 --> 01:42:15,801
We came to Google
for a reason.

2060
01:42:16,047 --> 01:42:19,551
I can't promise we'll win,
but we're going back there...

2061
01:42:19,800 --> 01:42:22,644
...to see those kids and we're
going to see it through.

2062
01:42:22,887 --> 01:42:25,561
Now you get your ass
back in that car and ride.

2063
01:42:25,806 --> 01:42:29,151
You hear me, Billy
Bojangles McMahon? Ride!

2064
01:42:33,481 --> 01:42:36,826
"Contextual
targeting technology can...

2065
01:42:37,151 --> 01:42:40,997
...automatically
match your ads...

2066
01:42:41,656 --> 01:42:43,329
...to webpages...

2067
01:42:43,658 --> 01:42:47,504
...that are most relevant
to your business."

2068
01:42:48,829 --> 01:42:50,001
Yo-Yo?

2069
01:42:51,499 --> 01:42:54,844
"Review ad performance
to see impressions...

2070
01:42:55,169 --> 01:42:58,013
...click, cost and
conversion data."

2071
01:42:59,090 --> 01:43:01,843
You seem like good kids and I
appreciate you stopping by...

2072
01:43:02,093 --> 01:43:05,688
...but we're just a family-run business.
We don't do the Internet.

2073
01:43:06,847 --> 01:43:09,851
Thanks for coming. Frankie will
get you a slice on the way out.

2074
01:43:18,943 --> 01:43:20,115
Oi, oi!

2075
01:43:20,361 --> 01:43:21,362
Oh, great.

2076
01:43:21,612 --> 01:43:23,285
Lovely.
This guy.

2077
01:43:23,698 --> 01:43:26,292
Saw you checked in here on
foursquare, so we stopped by.

2078
01:43:26,784 --> 01:43:28,957
That's really creepy.
Is that all?

2079
01:43:29,203 --> 01:43:31,376
It is all, actually.
We just closed

2080
01:43:31,497 --> 01:43:33,716
a sale at a coffee shop
down the street.

2081
01:43:33,958 --> 01:43:37,462
Your chances of catching up to
us went from zero to piss all.

2082
01:43:37,878 --> 01:43:41,223
Now if you'll excuse us, we have
to get to the final meeting.

2083
01:43:41,549 --> 01:43:44,894
Get those jobs of which we're
so profoundly deserving.

2084
01:43:45,886 --> 01:43:46,887
Zach?

2085
01:43:47,221 --> 01:43:48,564
Eyes off the pizza.

2086
01:43:48,889 --> 01:43:51,733
God made you lactose
intolerant for a reason.

2087
01:43:52,393 --> 01:43:53,895
You're so fat.

2088
01:43:55,646 --> 01:43:56,989
You're so fat.

2089
01:43:57,648 --> 01:43:58,820
Let's go!

2090
01:43:59,066 --> 01:44:00,067
On me!

2091
01:44:06,824 --> 01:44:08,576
What a douche!

2092
01:44:11,746 --> 01:44:12,747
Guys.

2093
01:44:20,588 --> 01:44:22,090
Welcome back, Billy boy.

2094
01:44:22,423 --> 01:44:23,515
Good to be with you.

2095
01:44:23,632 --> 01:44:24,758
What happened there?

2096
01:44:25,009 --> 01:44:27,353
Uh, well, he didn't bite,
so it didn't go well.

2097
01:44:27,595 --> 01:44:29,438
You know who else
it didn't go well for'?

2098
01:44:29,597 --> 01:44:30,598
Lay it on us.

2099
01:44:30,848 --> 01:44:33,021
That's right,
the steel town girl, Alex.

2100
01:44:33,267 --> 01:44:36,771
When she finally got her shot,
she took a tumble and fell.

2101
01:44:37,104 --> 01:44:40,108
But she picked
herself back up...

2102
01:44:40,357 --> 01:44:43,201
...tightened that little ass,
pumped her legs...

2103
01:44:43,444 --> 01:44:47,449
...and danced herself right back
into a slot at that dance school.

2104
01:44:47,948 --> 01:44:49,950
And that's what
we're going to do.

2105
01:44:50,701 --> 01:44:52,795
Tighten your asses,
let's go.

2106
01:44:53,454 --> 01:44:55,206
Let's get
her done, boys.

2107
01:44:56,791 --> 01:44:59,294
Guys, we've always done
things the same way--

2108
01:44:59,376 --> 01:45:01,799
Yellow Pages, flyers,
San Jose Mercury News.

2109
01:45:02,129 --> 01:45:04,473
We're all creatures
of habit, Sal.

2110
01:45:04,590 --> 01:45:06,888
We like what we know,
no question.

2111
01:45:06,967 --> 01:45:09,265
But you know what the
scariest thing in life is'?

2112
01:45:09,345 --> 01:45:11,973
The thing in life that
frightens us the most?

2113
01:45:12,932 --> 01:45:14,058
Change.

2114
01:45:14,141 --> 01:45:16,644
I think most people
are set in their ways.

2115
01:45:16,977 --> 01:45:18,979
I know I need
change to come along

2116
01:45:19,104 --> 01:45:21,152
and kick me in
the ass to get me moving.

2117
01:45:21,398 --> 01:45:23,400
Guys, I know
where you're going.

2118
01:45:24,151 --> 01:45:25,494
But I'm not
changing anything.

2119
01:45:26,153 --> 01:45:29,657
Like I told your friends,
we're getting by okay.

2120
01:45:29,907 --> 01:45:31,875
Sal, if you fight for your
limitations, you get to keep them.

2121
01:45:31,951 --> 01:45:34,170
You're getting by okay.

2122
01:45:34,411 --> 01:45:36,084
Okay isn't good.

2123
01:45:36,330 --> 01:45:38,003
Okay isn't great,
or fantastic.

2124
01:45:38,123 --> 01:45:39,841
I'm starting to
think he's selfish!

2125
01:45:40,084 --> 01:45:42,257
I don't want to get
sideways with you...

2126
01:45:42,503 --> 01:45:47,179
...you're as big as a barn! But you're an artist!
This is great pizza!

2127
01:45:47,258 --> 01:45:49,101
Picasso with pepperoni!

2128
01:45:49,176 --> 01:45:51,975
And don't even get me
started on the sauce.

2129
01:45:52,054 --> 01:45:54,102
Is there nutmeg in there?
I respect the fact...

2130
01:45:54,348 --> 01:45:57,022
...you don't want to divulge, but
if I'm right, don't say anything.

2131
01:45:59,353 --> 01:46:00,445
Exactly!

2132
01:46:00,688 --> 01:46:01,689
There's your answer!

2133
01:46:02,022 --> 01:46:03,194
Come on!

2134
01:46:03,440 --> 01:46:05,784
All I'm saying is,
why should Papa John's...

2135
01:46:06,026 --> 01:46:08,700
make all the dough when Papa
Sal has the better sauce?

2136
01:46:08,946 --> 01:46:12,792
You sound like him. He wants
to open a Sal's in Los Gatos.

2137
01:46:13,033 --> 01:46:15,536
The big chains are killing us.
We barely stay afloat.

2138
01:46:15,786 --> 01:46:17,914
When you franchise,
you lose quality.

2139
01:46:18,038 --> 01:46:20,211
You lose the taste
that people trust.

2140
01:46:20,457 --> 01:46:23,131
You want to know
why my sauce is better?

2141
01:46:23,377 --> 01:46:26,381
I go to the farmers' market every day.
I buy tomatoes...

2142
01:46:26,630 --> 01:46:28,974
...get the basil,
the oregano.

2143
01:46:29,383 --> 01:46:34,230
I know these people. I'm part of
the fabric of this neighborhood.

2144
01:46:35,139 --> 01:46:36,482
That's good enough for me.

2145
01:46:36,724 --> 01:46:39,728
Sal, that's better than good enough.
That's the best.

2146
01:46:39,977 --> 01:46:42,071
We don't want you to
abandon the neighborhood.

2147
01:46:42,897 --> 01:46:46,743
All we're saying is, what if your
neighborhood got a little bit bigger?

2148
01:46:47,067 --> 01:46:51,072
Take a look at this, Sal. These are
all people who love your pizza.

2149
01:46:51,405 --> 01:46:53,078
Talk about
word of mouth, huh?

2150
01:46:53,324 --> 01:46:55,167
Don't you want to
talk back to them?

2151
01:46:55,242 --> 01:46:57,791
There are almost as many
people from Los Gatos

2152
01:46:57,870 --> 01:46:59,747
searching for Sal's as
there are in Palo Alto.

2153
01:46:59,997 --> 01:47:04,753
If there was a location closer
to them, they'd be regulars.

2154
01:47:05,085 --> 01:47:06,883
Boom! Just found
a great commercial spot

2155
01:47:06,962 --> 01:47:09,181
on Los Gatos Boulevard,
just hit the market.

2156
01:47:09,256 --> 01:47:11,634
It's .3 miles away from
the nearest farmers' market.

2157
01:47:11,717 --> 01:47:13,594
You can smell the tomatoes
from your door.

2158
01:47:13,677 --> 01:47:14,678
Farm to table!

2159
01:47:14,929 --> 01:47:16,101
F to T!

2160
01:47:16,430 --> 01:47:19,104
F to T is exactly right,
Gomer Lyle!

2161
01:47:19,350 --> 01:47:23,196
We're not asking you to
abandon the artistry, just...

2162
01:47:23,437 --> 01:47:25,940
...expand the reach a little.
At the end of the

2163
01:47:26,023 --> 01:47:28,242
day, the kids have
their information.

2164
01:47:28,442 --> 01:47:31,116
It's all accurate. I get it,
and I know you do, too.

2165
01:47:31,612 --> 01:47:35,116
Sal, I can't blame you
for being a little afraid.

2166
01:47:35,449 --> 01:47:39,704
Hell, we were scared for a long
time out there, grinding it out.

2167
01:47:39,954 --> 01:47:43,208
And Lord knows I've fallen on
my ass more than a time or two.

2168
01:47:43,457 --> 01:47:45,300
But I promise you something.

2169
01:47:45,626 --> 01:47:47,128
You lift your head up...

2170
01:47:47,252 --> 01:47:49,846
...and take a breath...

2171
01:47:50,547 --> 01:47:52,891
...there are a lot of great
possibilities out there.

2172
01:47:53,634 --> 01:47:56,137
New customers,
new franchise--

2173
01:47:56,470 --> 01:48:00,316
--just the tip of the iceberg. It's
waiting at the click of a button.

2174
01:48:02,768 --> 01:48:04,611
Everybody's
searching for something.

2175
01:48:04,979 --> 01:48:06,652
They're searching for you.

2176
01:48:06,981 --> 01:48:08,824
We just want to
help them find you.

2177
01:48:15,698 --> 01:48:17,871
T.G.I.F., Nooglers!

2178
01:48:18,325 --> 01:48:19,668
All right!

2179
01:48:21,996 --> 01:48:25,000
Easy, easy. It's okay.

2180
01:48:25,332 --> 01:48:27,460
Today marks not only
the end of the week,

2181
01:48:27,584 --> 01:48:29,712
but the end of
the summer's internships.

2182
01:48:30,045 --> 01:48:31,137
I know.

2183
01:48:31,213 --> 01:48:33,011
As you see
through these images

2184
01:48:33,173 --> 01:48:35,016
behind me,
it's been quite a journey.

2185
01:48:35,259 --> 01:48:38,012
A lot of memories,
a lot of bonds were made.

2186
01:48:38,262 --> 01:48:41,106
Kind of reminds me of the
first time I-- All right.

2187
01:48:41,348 --> 01:48:43,851
Today we reveal
the intern team...

2188
01:48:44,184 --> 01:48:46,278
...that will be
awarded jobs here.

2189
01:48:47,354 --> 01:48:50,028
Sadly, one team
has not returned, so...

2190
01:48:50,357 --> 01:48:52,780
...therefore I am
forced to calculate the

2191
01:48:52,901 --> 01:48:55,370
results with their score
as an incomplete.

2192
01:49:01,702 --> 01:49:03,204
We have a victor.

2193
01:49:04,705 --> 01:49:06,378
Congratulations--

2194
01:49:24,558 --> 01:49:25,559
What's going on?

2195
01:49:27,061 --> 01:49:28,404
What a feeling

2196
01:49:30,147 --> 01:49:32,491
Being's believing

2197
01:49:33,067 --> 01:49:34,910
Okay, calm down!

2198
01:49:35,152 --> 01:49:39,157
Pictures come alive You can
dance right through your life

2199
01:49:42,159 --> 01:49:43,832
Take your passion

2200
01:49:45,245 --> 01:49:48,089
And make it happen

2201
01:49:49,416 --> 01:49:54,092
Pictures come alive You can
dance right through your life

2202
01:49:57,424 --> 01:49:59,097
What a feeling

2203
01:49:59,343 --> 01:50:00,686
Nice!

2204
01:50:09,603 --> 01:50:11,276
Come on!

2205
01:50:16,693 --> 01:50:18,787
Extra toppings
on this one, boss.

2206
01:50:19,363 --> 01:50:20,364
I see that.

2207
01:50:27,037 --> 01:50:29,165
Yeah!

2208
01:50:29,289 --> 01:50:30,882
That's enough!

2209
01:50:31,125 --> 01:50:32,968
That's enough! !

2210
01:50:35,879 --> 01:50:38,052
Lovely theatrics,
but the jig is up.

2211
01:50:38,298 --> 01:50:40,721
It's too late. Rules
are rules, right, Chetty?

2212
01:50:40,968 --> 01:50:42,811
Yes. Rules are rules.

2213
01:50:43,470 --> 01:50:46,314
And the rules state that
every team has the right...

2214
01:50:46,640 --> 01:50:49,234
...until the announcement is
made to turn in their sales.

2215
01:50:49,810 --> 01:50:53,986
So, in spite of your lack of
punctuality, which is astounding...

2216
01:50:55,149 --> 01:50:58,995
...I have no choice but to
accept this submission...

2217
01:50:59,403 --> 01:51:00,495
...and to recalculate.

2218
01:51:01,488 --> 01:51:03,490
Go ahead. Recalculate.

2219
01:51:03,824 --> 01:51:07,328
One sale to a small family pizza
joint won't make a difference.

2220
01:51:07,578 --> 01:51:10,957
It does seem that Mr. Hawtrey
is correct once again.

2221
01:51:11,039 --> 01:51:12,165
Boom!

2222
01:51:12,249 --> 01:51:15,844
The sales from one shop
on the last challenge...

2223
01:51:16,044 --> 01:51:18,046
...are not enough to
put you in the lead.

2224
01:51:18,338 --> 01:51:19,339
I'm sorry, bud.

2225
01:51:21,175 --> 01:51:22,176
MR. CHETTYY But...

2226
01:51:23,844 --> 01:51:25,187
...this...

2227
01:51:25,512 --> 01:51:27,185
...is not one shop.

2228
01:51:27,681 --> 01:51:29,354
You see, this...

2229
01:51:30,184 --> 01:51:34,690
is a blossoming franchise with endless
possibilities, thanks to you.

2230
01:51:35,022 --> 01:51:39,027
And what you have done as a
team is connect to people.

2231
01:51:39,359 --> 01:51:41,703
And connect those
people to information.

2232
01:51:42,029 --> 01:51:44,373
Which is what we do.

2233
01:51:44,865 --> 01:51:47,709
And more than that, you
have the courage to dream.

2234
01:51:48,035 --> 01:51:53,041
In spite of your obvious
and astonishing limitations...

2235
01:51:53,874 --> 01:51:55,876
...you never gave up
on that dream.

2236
01:51:56,877 --> 01:51:58,049
So...

2237
01:51:58,545 --> 01:51:59,717
...gentlemen...

2238
01:52:00,547 --> 01:52:01,673
...and lady...

2239
01:52:01,882 --> 01:52:03,384
Whoa, whoa, hold on.

2240
01:52:03,717 --> 01:52:06,721
Chetty, no offense, you're
a glorified babysitter.

2241
01:52:07,054 --> 01:52:09,898
Let's get somebody down here
who means something.

2242
01:52:10,224 --> 01:52:11,521
I'm right here.

2243
01:52:11,642 --> 01:52:12,894
Terrific.

2244
01:52:15,896 --> 01:52:18,900
Graham, please
meet Mr. Anderson.

2245
01:52:19,191 --> 01:52:20,238
You know this guy?

2246
01:52:20,525 --> 01:52:24,200
I should think so. Andrew
here is the head of Search...

2247
01:52:24,404 --> 01:52:27,203
...a rather important
position here at Google.

2248
01:52:27,407 --> 01:52:29,034
Honored-- It's an honor.

2249
01:52:29,243 --> 01:52:31,917
Look at you, Headphones. A
little mystery behind the boy.

2250
01:52:32,204 --> 01:52:33,251
How do you know him?

2251
01:52:33,538 --> 01:52:37,088
We were encouraged to reach
out to experienced Googlers.

2252
01:52:37,376 --> 01:52:41,256
To reach out to other Googlers,
not just kiss their asses.

2253
01:52:41,546 --> 01:52:44,265
You see,
these interns are smart...

2254
01:52:45,092 --> 01:52:46,435
...collaborative...

2255
01:52:46,927 --> 01:52:48,770
pretty...
Thank you.

2256
01:52:49,096 --> 01:52:52,771
...and just weird enough
to make them interesting.

2257
01:52:53,100 --> 01:52:56,775
Also, they came
together as a team...

2258
01:52:57,104 --> 01:52:58,947
...to do something here.

2259
01:52:59,273 --> 01:53:02,277
Their Googliness is
truly off the charts.

2260
01:53:02,609 --> 01:53:06,614
Oh, stop with the "Googliness".
What does that even mean?

2261
01:53:06,947 --> 01:53:09,416
The fact that you
don't know what it means

2262
01:53:09,533 --> 01:53:11,956
is why you will
never work here.

2263
01:53:13,787 --> 01:53:14,959
Also...

2264
01:53:15,414 --> 01:53:19,089
...you just made me use a bunch of
words in front of a ton of people.

2265
01:53:19,334 --> 01:53:21,678
Look at me-- you're a
real dick for doing that.

2266
01:53:21,920 --> 01:53:25,265
Look at me again. And I know
that your accent is bullshit.

2267
01:53:25,841 --> 01:53:27,013
What?

2268
01:53:29,678 --> 01:53:30,850
So...

2269
01:53:35,183 --> 01:53:36,856
...welcome to Google.

2270
01:53:41,648 --> 01:53:42,740
All right!

2271
01:53:44,109 --> 01:53:45,281
Yes!

2272
01:53:53,452 --> 01:53:54,795
I have a job!

2273
01:53:55,037 --> 01:53:56,710
I have a job!

2274
01:53:57,039 --> 01:54:00,885
Why are you getting up?
I should be the winner.

2275
01:54:01,626 --> 01:54:03,128
I hope you're all happy.

2276
01:54:03,211 --> 01:54:06,340
Maybe if I had a team of
equals who contributed

2277
01:54:06,423 --> 01:54:08,425
once in a while, this
wouldn't have happened.

2278
01:54:08,884 --> 01:54:11,137
What do you have
to say for yourself, eh?

2279
01:54:12,220 --> 01:54:14,063
I think it's time
to fake an injury.

2280
01:54:14,306 --> 01:54:16,308
What are you--

2281
01:54:16,391 --> 01:54:17,483
Ohh!

2282
01:54:17,559 --> 01:54:18,560
Man down!

2283
01:54:20,228 --> 01:54:23,402
Chetty, I appreciate
what you said back there.

2284
01:54:23,648 --> 01:54:25,742
You had us figured
wrong from the start.

2285
01:54:25,984 --> 01:54:27,577
He voted for you
from the start.

2286
01:54:27,903 --> 01:54:29,075
What?

2287
01:54:29,321 --> 01:54:31,824
Mr. Chetty was
the deciding vote.

2288
01:54:32,240 --> 01:54:34,618
I didn't have a fancy education
like most of the people here.

2289
01:54:34,701 --> 01:54:37,170
I had to work hard
to get where I am.

2290
01:54:37,579 --> 01:54:41,584
I recognized a similar tenacity in
you two, so I took a chance on you.

2291
01:54:42,751 --> 01:54:45,095
You did test my faith
a few times.

2292
01:54:46,254 --> 01:54:47,927
Basically, the entire time.

2293
01:54:48,256 --> 01:54:50,099
But I'm glad you
proved me right.

2294
01:54:50,592 --> 01:54:53,266
Chetty,
thanks for betting on us.

2295
01:54:58,517 --> 01:55:01,361
It looks like you'll be
seeing a lot more of me here.

2296
01:55:01,686 --> 01:55:03,939
So it does.
Congratulations.

2297
01:55:04,022 --> 01:55:05,023
Thank you.

2298
01:55:05,857 --> 01:55:06,858
The other night--

2299
01:55:07,359 --> 01:55:08,611
It was fun.

2300
01:55:08,860 --> 01:55:09,827
It was fun.

2301
01:55:09,903 --> 01:55:11,826
Right?
Yeah.

2302
01:55:15,200 --> 01:55:16,543
No regrets.

2303
01:55:17,702 --> 01:55:18,874
No.

2304
01:55:31,633 --> 01:55:34,136
Let's get to that warm,
fuzzy part.

2305
01:55:34,344 --> 01:55:35,687
That's not going to happen.

2306
01:55:37,806 --> 01:55:40,559
I love him even more.
He leaves it cold like that.

2307
01:55:40,892 --> 01:55:43,896
You keep playing hard to get,
you'll find yourself alone!

2308
01:55:44,146 --> 01:55:45,693
We're
not having a beer together.

2309
01:55:45,772 --> 01:55:47,900
We're going to have five.
We're equals now.

2310
01:55:47,983 --> 01:55:49,075
No, we're not.

2311
01:55:49,151 --> 01:55:50,494
Yes, we are!
No, we're not.

2312
01:55:50,735 --> 01:55:52,328
Let's go find more interns.

2313
01:55:52,446 --> 01:55:54,073
Please stop
talking to me.

2314
01:55:54,322 --> 01:55:55,414
We'll get drunk!

2315
01:56:03,415 --> 01:56:05,509
Have a great
senior year. We'll keep

2316
01:56:05,625 --> 01:56:07,343
your desk chairs warm.
Team Lyle!

2317
01:56:07,461 --> 01:56:09,008
Team Lyle!

2318
01:56:11,089 --> 01:56:13,091
Yo-Yo! Come! Now!

2319
01:56:13,425 --> 01:56:14,768
Mom, I need a minute.

2320
01:56:15,010 --> 01:56:16,512
We need to--
Mom.

2321
01:56:16,928 --> 01:56:20,774
I'm saying good-bye to my friends.
I'm taking a minute.

2322
01:56:21,266 --> 01:56:22,438
Okay?

2323
01:56:29,274 --> 01:56:31,777
You grew an eyebrow,
Yo-Yo! Come on!

2324
01:56:32,110 --> 01:56:35,455
Okay, you riff-raff, get out of here!
See you down the road.

2325
01:56:35,947 --> 01:56:37,039
Thank you, Captain.

2326
01:56:37,157 --> 01:56:38,283
Thank you, Big B.

2327
01:56:40,785 --> 01:56:42,128
My Khaleesi.

2328
01:56:42,245 --> 01:56:43,622
My sun and stars.

2329
01:56:44,122 --> 01:56:46,124
Want to get weird
in a nap pool'?

2330
01:56:46,374 --> 01:56:49,878
So, don't be a stranger.
Shoot me a text sometime.

2331
01:56:50,128 --> 01:56:52,631
Forget that. I'll come
see you in person.

2332
01:56:53,298 --> 01:56:55,847
I'd like that.

2333
01:56:56,968 --> 01:56:58,060
I grew a pair of balls,
did you see?

2334
01:56:58,178 --> 01:56:59,304
A big pair.

2335
01:56:59,554 --> 01:57:00,726
You were amazing!

2336
01:57:00,972 --> 01:57:02,144
They're touching
my ankles.

2337
01:57:02,265 --> 01:57:03,482
Okay, we don't
need that.

2338
01:57:05,644 --> 01:57:06,987
Congratulations, guys.

2339
01:57:07,312 --> 01:57:08,655
Thank you, boss!

2340
01:57:09,147 --> 01:57:12,947
I did get you a little something.
Not to get too sentimental...

2341
01:57:13,026 --> 01:57:14,994
Whoa! Whoa!

2342
01:57:15,362 --> 01:57:18,536
Look at this high roller!
Busting out the Pappy on me!

2343
01:57:18,865 --> 01:57:20,708
I figured we earned a swig.
Mmm-hmm!

2344
01:57:21,243 --> 01:57:22,369
Hell of a summer, bud.

2345
01:57:22,869 --> 01:57:24,542
Hell of a summer.

2346
01:57:42,931 --> 01:57:44,148
Doo wacko!

2347
01:57:52,941 --> 01:57:57,697
Here is to you, honey
But I'm out of your league

2348
01:57:59,155 --> 01:58:05,504
Never gonna pass me 'Cause I'm out of
your league, your league, your league

2349
01:58:05,579 --> 01:58:10,085
Lookie here, baby
You're coming my way

2350
01:58:11,167 --> 01:58:14,091
But I move
like a landslide

2351
01:58:14,170 --> 01:58:17,549
So get out of my way
and stay away

2352
01:58:17,799 --> 01:58:20,427
Up from the floor
on the count of ten

2353
01:58:20,510 --> 01:58:23,810
Oh, you get up, you get
down and you try it again

2354
01:58:23,888 --> 01:58:26,516
Up and down
and around again

2355
01:58:26,600 --> 01:58:28,102
British! Listen,
Professor--

2356
01:58:32,522 --> 01:58:33,865
All right

2357
01:58:45,452 --> 01:58:50,128
Time to learn a lesson
Like Pavlov's dog

2358
01:58:51,333 --> 01:58:54,007
If same-mg isn't working

2359
01:58:54,085 --> 01:58:57,305
Why don't you different
instead, instead, instead

2360
01:58:57,380 --> 01:59:01,726
Like Samson and Delilah
Attila and the Huns

2361
01:59:03,470 --> 01:59:04,847
I understand that,
but here we go.

2362
01:59:04,929 --> 01:59:06,306
Go cheek to cheek.

2363
01:59:06,640 --> 01:59:08,313
Yes, yes, I get it.

2364
01:59:08,642 --> 01:59:09,985
Hi, my name is Billy!

2365
01:59:10,226 --> 01:59:11,569
Nick Campbell.

2366
01:59:12,854 --> 01:59:15,778
Oh, you get up, you get
down and you try it again

2367
01:59:16,358 --> 01:59:18,656
Up and down
and around again

2368
01:59:18,735 --> 01:59:21,909
Oh, you get up, you get
down and you try it again

2369
01:59:24,908 --> 01:59:28,037
Oh, you get up, you get
down and you try it again

2370
01:59:31,247 --> 01:59:36,247
Oh, you get up, you get
down and you try it again

2371
01:59:46,513 --> 01:59:48,356
Guys, hey.

2372
01:59:48,431 --> 01:59:50,604
Hey.
So, what do you think?

2373
01:59:51,101 --> 01:59:52,694
Cosplay,
what can you say?

2374
01:59:52,769 --> 01:59:55,147
I knew you'd love it. Stuart
totally loves it too, now.

2375
01:59:55,271 --> 01:59:56,614
You guys have fun.
Okay, great.

2376
01:59:56,690 --> 01:59:58,112
Don't worry about us,
we're having a great time.

2377
01:59:58,233 --> 01:59:59,359
Don't worry about us,
we're having fun.

2378
01:59:59,442 --> 02:00:01,035
Here we go.
I get it.

2379
02:00:01,111 --> 02:00:02,988
Classics Luke and Han
with Boba Fett.

2380
02:00:03,071 --> 02:00:04,744
Couple of observers,
we're just here to observe.

2381
02:00:04,823 --> 02:00:06,120
It's me.
Kevin!

2382
02:00:06,199 --> 02:00:08,076
What the shit?
Guys.

2383
02:00:08,159 --> 02:00:09,160
Kevin?
Yeah!

2384
02:00:09,285 --> 02:00:12,084
What the hell are you doing here?
Cosby.

2385
02:00:12,205 --> 02:00:14,207
Is it your first time at Cosby?
Excuse me?

2386
02:00:14,290 --> 02:00:16,668
It's my new journey.
And I have you to thank.

2387
02:00:16,751 --> 02:00:18,253
You really pointed
some things out,

2388
02:00:18,336 --> 02:00:20,009
I was being
a jerk to people.

2389
02:00:20,088 --> 02:00:21,214
'Cause I was
hurting inside.

2390
02:00:21,297 --> 02:00:22,719
Hell, it takes a big man to
admit he's wrong, Kevin.

2391
02:00:22,799 --> 02:00:23,800
Good for you.

2392
02:00:23,967 --> 02:00:26,265
Anyway, I'm gonna dive
back into the fun. Ooh!

2393
02:00:26,344 --> 02:00:27,891
Check out this
hot little number.

2394
02:00:27,971 --> 02:00:31,396
I don't know if it's an
Ewok or a space squirrel.

2395
02:00:31,474 --> 02:00:33,021
I can't wait
to rip into that.

2396
02:00:33,101 --> 02:00:34,648
How do you know who's
underneath the mask?

2397
02:00:34,728 --> 02:00:37,698
Look, I don't know what's underneath
the hood, and I don't give a shit.

2398
02:00:37,772 --> 02:00:39,649
I'm insatiable.
Now if you'll excuse me,

2399
02:00:39,733 --> 02:00:43,658
old Boba Fett's gonna give this
squirrel a couple of nuts to hide.

2400
02:00:44,279 --> 02:00:45,326
You know Boba Fett,

2401
02:00:45,405 --> 02:00:47,658
he always fucked the space
squirrel at the end of the movie.

2402
02:00:48,158 --> 02:00:51,412
Audience knew it was coming,
audience wanted it.

2403
02:00:51,494 --> 02:00:52,916
Audience got it!

2404
02:01:07,177 --> 02:01:10,681
She's coming on to me
because she said

2405
02:01:10,764 --> 02:01:13,517
I'm lonely
Darling, please

2406
02:01:13,600 --> 02:01:17,650
But instead of waiting,
I go flying off to you

2407
02:01:17,729 --> 02:01:21,029
Why? Oh, well,
just because

2408
02:01:41,961 --> 02:01:45,386
I arrive when you're gone,
so I wait at your door

2409
02:01:45,465 --> 02:01:48,890
You pull up in some
guy's car around four

2410
02:01:48,968 --> 02:01:52,563
I punch him, kiss
then carry you inside

2411
02:01:52,639 --> 02:01:55,518
Why? Oh, well,
just because

2412
02:02:23,711 --> 02:02:26,555
Oh, baby, do you
like me that way?

2413
02:02:27,131 --> 02:02:30,556
There's something 'bout you
that makes me want to say

2414
02:02:30,635 --> 02:02:33,263
I don't mind, I don't mind,
I don't mind

2415
02:02:34,097 --> 02:02:37,192
Oh, baby,
I like it that way

2416
02:02:37,684 --> 02:02:41,063
She's coming home to me
because she said

2417
02:02:41,145 --> 02:02:44,069
I'm lonely
Darling, please

2418
02:02:44,148 --> 02:02:50,622
But instead of waiting,
I go flying off to you

2419
02:02:54,117 --> 02:02:57,621
Why? Well, just because