Kamare's dilemma

"Come on Kamare, make us proud!!! Make the village proud!!!"
"Yes mother, I will definetly become a chunnin"
So said Kamare but his eyes were those of a dead man
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Kamare Hozuki was a boy who was always told how lucky he was and how lucky he should feel. Heir to a noble clan, he and his family had escaped a purge led by the mist on their clan due to rumors of a potential revolt.

"We could've died Kamare. But the village took us in! They saved us!"

They saved us so that we could go kill more people, that was what Kamare thought. Maybe it would've been better if we died with the rest of the Hozuki. The only time Kamare voiced this opinion to his father, he received a severe beating. After that the young boy never again tried to express himself to his parents.

"The Hozuki kid? He's uh....well he's average."
And so Kamare's plan became simple. He would simply fail as a shinobi until his parents gave up on him. Then he'd be free. Of course if his grades plumetted out of nowhere, his scheme would be obvious. So he decided he would slowly lower his level until he appeared unfit to become a ninja. At least that was the plan
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"Nice to meet you, the final member of our destined trio. Fate has brought us together to do great things!"
"Fujiwara...you're gonna scare him if you talk like that."
And yet through his contact with his teammates, that plan had been put on hold. At least for a while. Kamare deliberately made the team fail their very first mission. That way the both of them would come to hate him and it would make his task easier.

"Ah don't worry Kamare, even the dry sand cannot absorb the first water drop!"
"Fujiwara...what the hell is that saying..."

Neither of his teammates blamed him for his failure. In fact they both laughed about it. Surely next time, Kamare thought. But little by little he stopped failing as much. Little by little he got to know his teammates. He felt some happiness when he taught Fujiwara the proper etiquette for eating with a noble. He felt some sadness when Daiki told him about his disease. For a time Kamare completely forgot about his plan.
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"Alright our talents have finally been recognised!"
That's why Kamare felt so conflicted when his team got the opportunity to take part in the chunnin exams. He would've of course opted out of it if he was on his own but it was an exam that required all 3 members to participate. And seeing Daiki and Fujiwara looking so happy at the news, Kamare didn't have the heart to tell them no.
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"Should I....give it a real try?" Those were the thoughts rushing through Kamare's head as he entered the room when the first part of the chunnin exams would take place.