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OreImo x Railgun blog post 2

nakulas Jun 16th, 2013 131 Never
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  1. *** Translation of <http://ch.nicovideo.jp/dengeki-bunko/blomaga/ar251425>
  2. *** cf. <http://nakulas.blogspot.com/2013/06/oreimo-x-railgun-blog-post-2.html>
  3.  
  4. On the day of the live talk show, Kirino and I headed to the Dwango building in Nihonbashi.
  5.  
  6.  "It's huge. And awfully fancy. I'm nervous."
  7.  "Scaredy-cat. Y'know, I hear they're moving to an even nicer building soon."
  8.  "Seriously...? They have way too much money on their hands."
  9.  "Rumor has it that they're being funded by Academy City."
  10.  
  11.  Academy City...?
  12.  
  13. "Isn't Academy City the place where that 'A Certain Scientific Railgun' show
  14. takes place? The one you're collaborating with? What does that show have to do with Dwango?"
  15.  "It's just a rumor, but they say that Hiroyuki has connections in Academy City." [note: Hiroyuki is the moot of 2channel, among other things]
  16.  "For real!? Is he one of those 'espers'!?"
  17.  "Nah, apparently he's a magician on par with the level-5 espers on the science side. He's been working behind the scenes in Academy City for a long time or something like that."
  18.  "What does that even mean?"
  19.  "Come to think of it, when you compare them to the secret organizations like ITEM, GROUP, and BLOCK, Dwango and Niwango just don't have the same ring to them, do they?"
  20.  
  21.  All non-Japanese words.
  22.  This all sounds awfully dangerous... magicians, secret organizations, and all.
  23.  I wonder if this would make more sense if I had read 'A Certain Magical Index'.
  24.  
  25.  "I don't really know what Hiroyuki has to do with Dwango, but after he resigned as director of Niwango, he hid in Academy City for a while, and did some stuff in secret. Supposedly, he's planning to take over the world with Niconico Douga. That's just a rumor, though."
  26.  "Oh-hoh. Who'd you hear all this from?"
  27.  "Kuroneko."
  28.  
  29.  Her story just became a lot less credible. That sounds like another one of her chuu2 fantasies.
  30.  Well, whatever. It's not any of my business.
  31.  
  32.  "Oh boy, if those rumors are true, there could be dark secrets in our crossover, too!"
  33.  "Woah, woah, just leave that stuff to the battle manga. Like, uh, Shakugan. She's been around for a while and she's still popular."
  34.  "That's not going to cut it. All the old-timers are busy, and they're all bad with public speaking anyway."
  35.  
  36.  Yeah, I guess that Kirino is good at acting nice. She's probably the best Dengeki Bunko heroine for the job.
  37.  
  38.  "You met Dokkoida at the Machi Asobi event in Tokushima, didn't you? Couldn't you call him?"
  39.  "He wouldn't make it here in time. Just get a hold of yourself, dammit."
  40.  
  41.  Kirino pointed at me.
  42.  
  43.  "If something goes wrong, you'd better protect me."
  44.  "Hey, if it comes down to it, I'll risk my life for you."
  45.  "D-dummy."
  46.  "...why are you mad now?"
  47.  
  48.  We made some idle chatter as we walked. Eventually, we reached the Dwango building.
  49.  
  50.  Right inside the entrance, there was a phone, which we used to call the receptionist.
  51.  And then---
  52.  
  53.  With a blipping noise, a girl with pigtails suddenly appeared in front of us.
  54.  
  55.  "Woah!"
  56.  
  57.  I was so surprised that I stumbled forward.
  58.  Kirino, on the other hand, had this glow in her eyes.
  59.  
  60.  "S-seriously!? Wow!" she shouted.
  61.  "It is a pleasure to meet you, Ms. Kousaka Kirino. And Mr. Kousaka Kyousuke. My name is Shirai Kuroko. In Academy City, I labor as a member of Judgement."
  62.  "It _is_ you! The teleporter! I finally get to meet you! Awesome!"
  63.  
  64.  On our way here, Kirino had told me about them.
  65.  The people we'd meet today were espers... in other words, people who had superpowers.
  66.  Kirino told me to "understand this stuff better." She sounded an awful lot like Kuroneko then. Well, I suppose she's right - I ought to.
  67.  ---And she was serious about them.
  68.  
  69.  "Hey, Kirino. You're being awfully rude."
  70.  
  71.  This Shirai Kuroko was rather small-built and quite charming. Kirino looked like she wanted to ask her to become her little sister. As such, it was a surprise that Kirino responded so well to my reprimand.
  72.  
  73.  "Ah... sorry. I was out of line there."
  74.  "No, no, it's quite all right. To the contrary, I'm happy that you're happy to see me. Sometimes, those of us at level 4 or higher are treated as monsters, after all."
  75.  "I could never call someone as cute as you a monster!"
  76.  
  77.  She emphasized that part.
  78.  Well, that's how you are, Kirino.
  79.  
  80.  "Why, thank you, miss. ...You are just as excellent a person as Uiharu's preliminary investigation suggested."
  81.  
  82.  Woah, back off there.
  83.  
  84.  "Uh, well, let me try again. Nice to meet you, Shirai. I'm Kousaka Kirino. This is my brother, Kyousuke."
  85.  "Pleasure to meet you. I hope today goes well."
  86.  "Yeah, same."
  87.  
  88.  The way she talks is a little weird, but she seemed like a proper girl---
  89.  
  90.  "I shall escort you to the waiting room now."
  91.  
  92.  ---until just then.
  93.  
  94.  
  95.     *
  96.  
  97.  
  98.  We rode an elevator up ten floors.
  99.  
  100.  "Wow, really?!" 
  101.  "Indeed! Oneesama's greatest role is yet to come! Out of all the 2.3 million people in Academy City, she stands atop it as the third-strongest Level 5! My Oneesama, Misaka Mikoto, the Railgun, of Tokiwadai Middle School---"
  102.  "'..is the pride and joy of Dengeki Bunko, its invincible electric princess', right, Kuroko?"
  103.  "Precisely! Miss Kirino... you do seem to know your way about these matters!"
  104.  "But the truth is that she loves stuffed animals and she wears kiddy panties, and all that, right?! Squee!"
  105.  "Preeeecisely! Miss Kirino... you really do seem to know your way about these matters!!!!! Squee!"
  106.  
  107.  Geez, this is a creepy conversation.
  108.  They're already on a first-name basis, too.
  109.  
  110.  "If I may ask, how did you become so knowledgable about Oneesama, Miss Kirino!?"
  111.  "How much do you know about the plan to use Tree Diagram to investigate the Railgun's panties, Kuroko?"
  112.  "Such a wonderful plan exists!? This is the first time I've heard of it!"
  113.  "Well, you can read more about that in the one-shot 'Supplement to Dengeki Bunko MAGAZINE: Toradora!  vs. Index' (*), so setting that aside for now..."
  114. (*) Supplement to the September 2008 issue of "Dengeki Bunko MAGAZINE".  A one-shot add-on to "Railgun", by Fuyukawa Motoi.
  115.  
  116.  "Are you going to stop right there!? But I'm so curious!"
  117.  "Of course I wouldn't. Actually, _this_ is how I found out about Mikoto's panties!"
  118.  
  119.  With a "Tada!", Kirino showed Kuroko her smartphone.
  120.  
  121.  "What!"
  122.  
  123.  And on the screen---
  124.  
  125.  
  126.  
  127.  
  128. <http://i.imgur.com/Arsm0aH.jpg>
  129. Kotobukiya: "A Certain Scientific Railgun - Misaka Mikoto - A Certain Railgun in a Maid Outfit" (1/6-scale PVC, prepainted, no assembly required)
  130.  
  131.  
  132.  "Drool...! A figure of Oneesama!"
  133.  "Th-that's right!"
  134.  
  135.  Kirino wiped Kuroko's drool off her screen with a tissue, and,
  136.  
  137.  "Hehehe... see, Kuroko?"
  138.  "B-but, Miss Kirino! This figure...! Naturally, I, too own this figure, but Oneesama's panties were obscured by her short shorts, and I could only get the vaguest glimpse of them...!"
  139.  "Heh heh heh heh..."
  140.  
  141.  Kirino laughed fearlessly.
  142.  Haughtily, Kuroko pressed her for answers.
  143.  
  144.  "Th-they are not there! Oneesama merchandise with visible panties is forbidden by Dengeki Bunko and Dengeki Daioh! There could not possibly be a publicly-available figure that revealed her panties! There just... couldn't...!" 
  145.  
  146.  Kirino grinned.
  147.  
  148.  "I took them off," she replied.
  149.  "Whaaaat!?"
  150.  
  151.  Kuroko fell backwards. What an overreaction.
  152.  
  153.  "...w-w-w-w-what did you just say? If my ears do not fail me, I believe I just heard a Dengeki Bunko heroine utter a nigh-treasonous statement against our creators, ASCII Media Works..."
  154.  "If you do it really slowly and really carefully, you can take off the figure's panties."
  155.  "!!!!!"
  156.  
  157.  Suddenly, Kuroko's body shook, as though she had been struck by lightning.
  158.  She opened her eyes wide and, 
  159.  
  160.  "Miss Kirino! How could you! H-h-h-how could yooouuu------!!!!!! ......do you have any pictures?"
  161.  
  162.  ...she's hopeless.
  163.  They were so ladylike just a little while back. What happened to that?
  164.  Man, and the way Kuroko looks when she talks about her "Oneesama"....
  165.  It's just how my sister looks when she's talking about her dating sims....
  166.  My pervert sensors were going off when I met her.
  167.  
  168.  "It has been a long time since I last met someone who was this interested in Oneesama."
  169.  "Same here."
  170.  
  171.  Oneesama talk, huh.
  172.  You guys are awfully close already.
  173.  They'd been in high spirits, talking about "Mikoto-Oneesama", for quite a while now.
  174.  
  175.  "Well, we are about to reach the waiting room."
  176.  
  177.  Kuroko pointed ahead of us.
  178.  The hallway continued on in that direction, and on one side of it was a room that looked kind of like a recording studio.
  179.  Maybe this is where the taping was going to happen.
  180.  ...I'm not even going to be on the show, and I'm still nervous.
  181.  
  182.  "U-um..."
  183.  "Yes? What is the matter?"
  184.  "So, I get that your Misaka Mikoto-Oneesama is really strong and cool and loves you in _that_ way, but..."
  185.  "Your powers of discernment are splendid, Mr. Kyousuke. What of it?"
  186.  "...well, now that I know all that, I'm kind of scared of her."
  187.  "...ah-ha, I see. Uiharu expected that of you, as well."
  188.  "Huh?"
  189.  "I imagine that you are concerned about letting your dear, dear little sister meet my fearsome Oneesama, are you not?"
  190.  "What? N-not at all!"
  191.  "Please, do not worry. Oneesama is both strong and kind... you need not be afraid."
  192.  
  193.  That's not what I meant...! She's not good at listening, huh.
  194.  
  195.  "Yeah, he's a siscon. We'll be fine!" said Kirino, with one finger raised.
  196.  
  197.  
  198.  
  199.  "After all, Mikoto is the most sensible of all the level 5s. ---right? Kuroko?"
  200.  "............"
  201.  
  202.  Hey, she's not replying....
  203.  
  204.  "...y-yes, well, given who the other level 5s are, that is certainly true."
  205.  "That just made me more worried!"
  206.  
  207.  Sweat was dripping down Kuroko's forehead.
  208.  
  209.  "P-please do not worry. Even Oneesama would refrain from using her electricity on ordinary---"
  210.  
  211.  Just before Kuroko finished---
  212.  
  213.  Kabooom! 
  214.  
  215.  A rumbling sound echoed about. An angry wind blew our way from further down the hall.
  216.  
  217.  "Wh-what's going on!?"
  218.  "The door exploded!"
  219.  
  220.  I stepped forward immediately, shielding my sister behind me.
  221.  As the wind battered me, I squinted.
  222.  
  223.  Zap zap zap!!
  224.  
  225.  Blue bolts of lightning surged forth in front of me.
  226.  Then---
  227.  
  228.  "Why! The! Hell! Are _you_ here!"
  229.  "Gaaaaaaaaahh!! Such misfortuuuuuuune!!!!"
  230.  
  231.  A guy with a head like a sea urchin shouted as he ran my way.
  232.  
  233.  
  234.  
  235.  
  236.  
  237.  
  238.  
  239.  
  240.  
  241.  
  242.  
  243.  
  244.  ".........uuummm.......... he's okay, right?"
  245.  "Kirino, we're leaving. This is unsafe."
  246.  
  247.  
  248.  
  249.  
  250.  
  251. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
  252. To be continued in part 3: "A Certain Crossover Girl's Talk, Part 1"
  253. The next part will be presented on June 21 at midnight.
  254.  
  255. Note: part 2, "My little sister can't talk about underwear with a telporter!" will cease to be available on July 4 at 11:59pm.
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