Pepper's Wishes

Nobody really got me. That was what I had always thought leading up until that night. There was nothing that anybody had against me either. That was pretty clear too. Everybody had forgiven me for the incident with my blanket. I had never done anything to warrant overwhelming scorn. I'd never really proven myself valuable either. Nobody saw me as someone they couldn't live without. Even the person I looked up to the most really didn't get me. I wanted to fix that. It didn't matter that I'd probably get in trouble. At least that was what I'd thought. I was pretty stupid to think like that. In hindsight I shouldn't try to force others to see my perspective. Most of all, I learned the lesson that I should be very careful for what I wish for.

Max was laying on the bed in front of me, sleeping. I'd made sure that I'd told him we were just going on a camping trip. He had no idea what I'd do to make sure things were different from that. I'd told him I would bring the food. I told him I'd handle everything. He'd basically handed everything to me. Max was a great guy. Really trusting and super kind. And soft. With cute ears. A nice voice. Heavenly patience. Everything about him couldn't be better. There was nothing that I liked more than him. How could I have waited as long as I had to do this? It wouldn't have been hard no matter what. Max trusted me. Nobody really mistrusted the cute little sleepy panda.

Betsy had let me borrow some of her sleepytime tea after I'd told her it was an attempt to regulate my sleep schedule. That had been the key. Before our picnic, I'd made very sure that one of the old hiking cabins were nearby. A few sips of the warm tea had Max out like a light. There wasn't much he coud really do besides lay down while I feigned innocence and told him to stay calm. He'd looked scared. I felt guilty about it while I was dragging him to the cabin. The hiking trail cabins were meant for campers that got tired along the way around the island. It was a pretty big island after all. You could get lost on all the trails. That was why every mile or so there was a nicely furnished cabin with an emergency smoke signal. I didn't intend to use it for its actual purpose however. I wanted to use it as a prison for the person I liked the most. So I could get him to finally understand me.

It had started to rain outside by the time Max was coming to his senses. Finally! He'd been sleeping for a solid eight hours. I thought normal bats didn't need to sleep that much. Of course I needed almost 14 hours of sleep. but I was a panda. He was a totally normal, non-endangered species of mammal. That was too much. I wanted him now. I wanted him to wake up and I would pour my heart out to him. Tell him how great he was. How much I thought he was the bestt. The coolest person I knew by a million miles. Why he couldn't realize that on his own was a mystery to me. I knew for a fact that I'd make sure he knew by the end of the day.

He stirred and looked at me, then around the cabin. The interior was nothing to really write home about. A simple weartherproofed room. It was cool due to the magic the witches had put on it. The charm kept the room nice and chilly. I'd actually been impressed. None of our personal cabins had any such spells on them. Soft carpet, a big emergency kit on the far wall, a set of two beds, a fireplace, an axe hanging above it, a spigot and basin in the farthest corner. I sat there on the side of his bed, wanting him to turn his eyes back to me. When he didn't I felt dissapointment burning in my heart. He instead stared at the window. His voice seemed concerned about something not related to me. He didn't care that I'd dragged him back to this cabin. He didn't care that I'd kidnapped him. He only was really thinking about getting back to camp. He wanted to go and see his other friends. More interesting people. The words that came out of him made it abundantly clear that's how he felt.

"Hey Pepper... it's almost sundown. Shouldn't we head back to camp?" He asked me.

I looked away, then back at him. I didn't want to hurt him. I wanted him to just know how I felt. But the way he just wasn't focusing on me at all was frustrating. I wanted him to notice me! By the end of this I wanted him to understand me too. I wanted him to know that I just wanted attention. I wanted his bat ears to wiggle towards me when I spoke. I wanted his soft fur in my hands. Why couldn't he see that? I bit back my frustration and decided I'd at least try to talk to him.

"It's sorta late to do that. What if we go out there and it gets dark?" I said.

I genuinely didn't like the idea of going walking in the woods at night. What if we were eaten by a wolf or something? Or worse we could get totally lost. The witches would have to come find us. Which meant Susie would be looking for me. The sight of her was enough to make me hide behind the nearest piece of furniture. To have to sit through a long scolding from her... that'd probably be the last anyone would hear from me. I'd fall over right there of a heart attack. It'd be over. His response actually only made my anxiety worse.

"Yeah Pepper, but the others will be worried. We've gotta go." Max said, moving to stand up.

I couldn't let it happen. I leaned in and pushed him down onto the bed again. I started shaking my head. I knew a side effect of the tea was physical weakness. So I could still do that without him immediately pushing me off. Max was actually pretty strong. Definetely stronger than me. Not as much as Oscar, but I was an entire head and shoulders shorter. No way I'd be able to do this on my own. With the help of the sleepytime tea I could though. I tried to diffuse the situation with a laugh that I felt came off as nervous.

"Max, really. We can't get stuck outside after dark. Bad stuff happens! And I'm scared of the dark. Please? Stay here the night?"

At first it looked like he was going to agree with me. My heart soared. I wanted to hug him. Then he shook his head again. Just like that my heart plummeted back to the ground. His words then stomped on it.

"Pepper I promised Alexa I'd go to her sleepover. I have a flashlight in my bag, we'll be okay to walk."

I moved without really thinking. Tears were in my eyes. I didn't want to go out in the dark. Nothing could make me do that. Especially after what Oscar and Hedgehog had told everyone about the swamp. Besides, today was supposed to be special! My time to tell Max what I felt about him! My day to finally get the attention I needed so bad! I leaned down and put my hands on Max's shoulders, tears welling up in my eyes. I couldn't take it. I started to yell at him.

"Why won't you just spend time with me Max?! Why don't you understand me? I only want time together with you. I wanna tell you how I feel! You can't just keep ignoring me..."

I felt my claws starting to sink into his shirt, then into the soft fur beneath. I heard him gasp. Max couldn't be allowed to just throw away my feelings anymore. He cried out, trying to get me off of him. He was still too weak from the magical sleeping tea. I started yelling even louder, right into his sensitive ears.

"All the time you're just ignoring me Max! I try to talk to you but you don't let me. You always have something to do. You've gotta go play sports or do something I'm not good at! Or you'll walk away the second I fall asleep! I hate it Max! You don't understand how bad it feels! I just want some attention..." I shoved my head right into his chest, starting to cry. "Why can't you just be honest and say you hate me? I can at least get over that quicker!"

For a bit Max was squirming, trying to get me off of him. Once he realized he was too weak to do that, he started to actually reach his arms around me. At first I was confused. Until he started hugging me. Happiness flared in my heart. I looked up at him again. I relaxed my grip whenever I saw that he was looking down at me. His expression looked like he really scared, but trying to be nice. I saw a little bit of red on my claws and felt immediate guilt. How could I have done that to Max? I loved him! With the realization of what I'd done, I desperately wiped my claws on the bed.

"I'm sorry Max! I didn't mean it, I just wanted some attention... I love you! I want you to spend more time with me. Maybe we can go back to camp tomorrow, a-and spend time playing video games at my house? We can pretend I didn't do anything! I'm so sorry!"

His arms tightened around me again. I felt him actually reach down, patting my head. He took off my night-cap and set it aside, before he ruffled my ears. A sense of relaxation washed over me. Nothing could really come close to describing how I felt. The word 'perfect' sprang to mind. All the tension that had been building in my body vanished in an instant. I felt his strength starting to return. His embrace grew a bit tighter. He sat up, but I let him. I ended up in his lap, his soft hands resting against my sides.

"Pepper... that really hurt. I'm sorry that I haven't been giving you the attention you want. I should try and give you time like I do with all of my friends. But your claws dug sort of deep. I'm bleeding."

I couldn't just let this continue. I got off of him, leaving his embrace to go to the first aid kit on the wall. I opened it up and ran back to him, holding it out. He had sat up by them, rubbing his shoulders and the holes in his shirt. He took some bandages from the kit. It rattled around as he set it beside himself. He took off his shirt. My eyes grew wide as I saw his fluffy chest. It looked so nice. Soft and warm. I felt the immediate urge to push my face against it. I let him bandage his shoulders first before I leaned in, hugging him around his waist. I smushed my cheek right against the smooth fur, unable to help myself.

"Hey... Pepper." He said to me. "I can stay the night here. Sorry I haven't been giving you attention. Or letting you say how you feel. I guess I just thought you were okay on your own."

I looked up at him. My eyes felt like they were welling up with tears again. I didn't want to cry while I did this. Taking a step back, I drew my sleeve across my face. I needed to do this right. I sat on the bed beside him to get comfortable. I took his hand. Running his smooth palm over mine was sweeter than caramel apples on halloween. More rewarding than getting merit badges. I knew I was really getting what I wanted.

"Max, you're the best. I mean like, the best. You're great at sports. You're a good friend. I feel like you're the only person who really gets that I need someone beside me. Don't be weirded out! Pretty please! I can't help it. You're so soft and your ears are amazing when they twitch around. I love touching them and watching you react. You're the best whenever I'm about to sleep and I lean against you. I'd do anything to get you to spend more time around me."

I hoped with all my heart that he would realize how much me meant to me. How having his arms wrapped around me was probably the best thing that would ever, ever happen. How amazing his body felt next to mine. Pushing against my own. It was enough to make me want to follow him home at the end of the summer. I needed that in my life. Especially now that I really had a taste. He seemed quiet for a little while. His face looked like he was focused on thinking. Then he reached out and hugged me again. I eagerly reciprocated! This was what I wanted so badly! It took less than a second for me to push my face against his chest.

Then something I didn't really expect happened. He took me in his arms and leaned over onto the bed. Not quickly eneough to really cause me any sort of alarm. But the way he moved had me a bit confused. We were just hugging a second ago. It took until he leaned in towards me for me to get it. His smooth lips pushed against my cheek. I couldn't help but blush. Had he felt like this all along? I didn't know how I felt about that. I didn't really ever think about things like this. At the same time he was bringing me around to it. His silky soft hands reached up under my shirt, along my chest. My body's reaction was to shiver, but I didn't mind this. Until I felt something a bit out of place.

Max laid down against me. I felt something firm push against my thigh. My eyes went wide. I didn't know exact stuff about this sort of thing. But I did know from what little I'd understood from the books at the library that this wasn't exactly something I should be doing. It wasn't a bridge I wanted to really cross yet! I wasn't old enough! Max wasn't even old enough! I moved to get out from beneath him. His strength had returned though, and my small body was easily pushed down against the bed. How could I have let this happen? I'd had total control of the situaton and I'd just let it go. I looked around for anything to help me. Nothing within arm's reach. His words brought my attention back to his face.

"Pepper... y'know I really always thought you were super cute too. And soft. With the nicest fur. Just like you feel about me." He said, looking into my eyes. "Thing is though... I never acted on that. I knew that liking you like that is weird. Especially with how much of a kid you still are. But now... you locked me in a cabin. And pinned me to the bed. You clawed holes in my shoulder, Pepper."

Max's tone slowly went from caring to frustrated and upset. I didn't want to meet his gaze anymore. He was so nice. How could I have done this to him? Before I could linger with my thoughts for too long he jostled me again.

"Plus I bet that me falling asleep wasn't just random either. So you did all of this, just to have me all on my own. To express your feelings. Right?"

I gave a nod, starting to cry. I tried to hold back my whimpering but I couldn't. Even as he sighed, leaning down closer to  me, I couldn't help but tear up.

"Well I think that it's fair that I show you my feelings too then. Since you already worked out yours, Pepper. I think you're the cutest boy in the camp. I've tried spying on you tons of times. When you're asleep I sometimes cup my hand between your legs and rub a bit with my thumb. I push my ears up to your chest to hear your heartbeat during sleepovers. It helps me sleep better. I can't even begin to tell you how good you feel Pepper."

I felt my face growing more red as he continued to talk to me. The idea of him touching me like that made me feel violated. Loved and appreciated, like I had always wanted. But also deeply violated. I didn't know what to say to that. I laid there in stunned silence as I felt his breath grow heavier against me. Eventually my mind caught up with what was going on. I tried to squirm a bit, but he was just too strong. I was too small. I let out a small gasp of alarm as he pushed his hips against me. I felt the firm bump he had between his legs push up against my thigh. He shoved himself over me, positioning his middle between my legs. I was starting to shake. This had been what I'd wanted. The love and attention I'd craved was about to be given to me. Everything about it was wrong though. His words made my stomach tie itself in a knot.

"This is what you want right? R-right? I'm gonna love you. Just like you want it. And you're gonna get to feel my fur. My ears are all yours too. But it's not fair for you to kidnap me and drag me out here just to ignore my feelings."

I couldn't suppress the whimper building in my chest. His fingers gripped my hips as he brought me in, pulling me close to align himself with me. I felt my own special parts rubbing over his. I couldn't help but start to let tears roll down my face. This wasn't what I wanted. Not like this. It felt good but that didn't make it right. He soon slid down my sweatpants and began pushing his own parts against mine through the thin fabric of our underwear. I felt dirty about this. Everything about this was all wrong. I'd just wanted Max to be my best friend. Not this. He reached over to the first aid kit and pulled out some sort of jelly or paste, setting it beside us while he continued to hump against me. I told myself silently I wouldn't moan. I couldn't. This was all wrong.

Soon enough my whole body started to tingle. The special spot between my legs started to get a little less soft. I shakily looked down to see that Max's own private thing was actually much bigger than mine. It felt stiff, firm against my own. It made me feel confused. I didn't know how to feel about that. Soon he pulled my underwear down my legs and left my own thing bare to the world. While he pulled his own off I tried moving away, but he was too quick. He pinned me right back into position to start thrusting again. This time I couldn't help it. The friction felt really good. I was crying now. His bigger parts pushed mine against my furry stomach while I tried to ignore how great this was making my body feel. My breath was starting to come out as panting. I was still sorta soft down there. My confusion turned to more stimulation in my own mind. How was I supposed to feel about all this rolled around in my confused, scared brain.

Sooner than I thought I was starting to get louder. I wanted out from under him. Something was starting to happen down there I didn't like. It felt like it was building. But he gripped my hands in his on and forced his body on top of mine. I couldn't move with his stronger body continuing to thrust against me. I couldn't contain my sobs mixing in with defeated moans. It took a few more seconds of his rough treatment for it to happen. I began to cry louder than ever before he put his hand over my mouth. He gently shushed me and continued. Something wet and slimy was coating our special places now. It was from him. I hit my peak and cried out. My semi-soft part twitched and moved around underneath his, spasming fruitlessly beneath his own bigger bits. He moaned deeply whenever it happened. His eyes looked down at me with love addled with uncontained, wild urges.

I went totally slack as I stopped, sobbing helplessly against his hand. I felt terrible. Ruined on many different levels. Even though he started hushing me as he turned me over, I was inconsolable. I didn't even notice what he was doing until it was somewhat too late. He gently rolled me onto my front, my head against a pillow. I was tempted to go to sleep for a moment after all of this. Before a slick finger pushed itself up against my hindquarters. I yelped, but he shoved his hand on my back as he gently worked his soft finger upwards. Guiding it against my rear end, between my cheeks to a really delicate spot. I shook my head, looking back up at him. I tried mouthing my protests, but he leaned down and gave me a deep kiss on the lips from behind. My heart fluttered lightly before falling down into my stomach again. It'd be so much more special if it weren't for what he was doing right at that moment.

Then I felt something familiar slide between them. Max's special thing. Against that spot that I was sort of familiar with, but also not. Then further. An explosion of pain erupted from there, and I had to shove my head into the pillow to stop from deafening myself with the resulting cry. He whispered gently to me, coaxing me to relax. That it'd be much better if I loosened up. I did, but it was still stinging badly as I felt him smoothly slide inside of me. I felt so violated. A heavy moan filled the air as he continued, then started pushing against me over and over. Soon he reached down and began to gently rub his wet, gel-covered fingers over my own special place. I squirmed from the discomfort, but soon I was fighting not to moan from the overstimulation.

Each time he pushed in I felt a tiny little pulse of stimulation inside. It echoed in my special spot while Max rubbed his hands on it. As he started to breathe even heavier I found myself doing likewise. I didn't want to do this at the same time as him. My soft, limp parts still felt like they were building up to another big thing though. Like I was gonna feel that again. Tears streamed down my face as I felt the bat's most private part pushed up inside of me, and my body reacting in time with him. At long last I screamed into the pillow again, and he let out a satisfied moan. He said my name over and over again as I struggled to even move. My whole body felt weak. My whole loin felt sore after the treatment it had gotten. He pulled himself free and laid down on top of me again.

His heavily lidded eyes said everything. Max had shown me how he felt. Whether I liked it or not. Just like I had dragged him out there, knocked him out and lied about wanting to spend normal time with him. The bat had given me every bit of emotion he felt towards me. He'd soiled the sanctity of my body. I felt wet, scared and sore. He seemed very satisfied, though as he sat there panting, almost like he regretted this. After a second he shook his head. My favorite person leaned in to embrace me. His soft lips pushed over mine. His smooth fur pushed against my chest. I sobbed into the kiss. I felt so loved. This was the attention I had craved. This was everything I had wanted.