Phew

https://desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/29734304

>”Phew, haha Anon, your pee-pee really stinks! You should let me-“
>You watch as Lyra gets drop kicked across the town square. Nopony even bats an eye, yourself included.
>Every single day she does this, goes up to Anon – usually in public – and tells him how bad his dick stinks.
>Then she offers to “clean” it with her mouth.
>Doesn’t she realize it won’t work?
>How many times can one mare do the same fruitless routine?
>Anon has already resumed his conversation with Twilight, who just doesn’t care about the daily assault charge she’s supposed to file any more.
>Even the law thinks Lyra’s advances are pathetic.
>At least YOU-
>Wait.
>At least you what?
>At least you don’t even have the courage to even try to ask him out?
>You, Rainbow Dash, the star of the Wonderbolts!
>The Element of Loyalty!
>Savior of Equestria!
>You!
>You…
>are not going to ever do it.
>You know this. You’ll never work up the courage even to talk to him.
>All your friends think your xenophobic.
>”First the griffon, now this?” Twilight demanded of you one night after you refused to see him.
>But really, you’d like to see him.
>But you don’t want him to see you.
>See you… with your too-big wings, and your too-bright mane, and your weird ass-rainbows that show up whenever you fly.
>The albinos are more appealing than you.
>Seriously, you did a survey.
>You sigh. Just keep resting on your cloud, Rainbow, pretend not to be staring at him.
>Looks like Lyra is trying again.
>”You know, Anon, you can’t just walk around with a stinky-“
>Her head is slammed into the cobblestone road by a purple magic aura.
>Huh, Twilight doesn’t usually get involved. Must be in a bad mood today.
>At least you’re not the only one.
>But then she starts talking to Anon again.
>Goddamn it.