A lass left to wonder

It's a very rough spot, I realize
Too many of us are trying to find answers
Sometimes, we just won't get them
Even five years later...

I took off my mask, and threw it away
I fought so hard and long under that disguise
But it looks like freezing myself up
Just wasn't going to work with these people

So then, I'm back to fighting another struggle
As I keep writing guy on guy action, then girl on girl action
I begin to ponder what's up ahead past the river
The river known as change itself.