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- >Day Morbid in Equestria
- >You are Anon
- >Madman
- >Wake up
- >Shit, shower, shave
- >Stroll over to the window and throw back the curtains
- >A small town can be seen from it
- >Ponyville, to be exact
- >You hated going there, since you preferred your little cosy cottage
- >Being a hermit was awesome
- >Especially since the peace and quiet gave you ample time to work on your creations
- >What creations, I hear you ask, dear reader?
- >You walk into your kitchen and over to the large wooden door in the corner
- >Several giant metal locks keep it nice and shut
- >Wouldn't want the unfathomable horror that lies within to escape and wreak havoc upon the unsuspecting masses
- >...Yet
- >Grab a small burlap sack full of food off the table next to the door
- >Gulp
- >And undo all the locks
- >The door creaks open
- >The stench of death instantly fills your nostrils
- >You're used to it though
- >Walk down the steps and turn on the lights
- >A hideous creature of insurmountable revulsion stumbles into the light
- >It inspires fear into your heart
- >Truly, you are a monster for creating such a vile and sinful creati-
- >"Oh, hi, Anon. Is it morning already?"
- >...
- >You wish she would act more like a monster sometimes
- "Mornin', Grubs."
- 1/?
- >Grubs stretches
- >Her front leg's stitches come undone and it falls to the floor
- >You both stare at it
- >"Uhh, you can fix that, right?"
- >Huff and stroll past her
- "Of course I can, you foolish minion!"
- >"That was uncalled for, Anonymous."
- "...Sorry. But I'd like it if you at least TRIED to act like a brainless drone"
- >Grubs sniffs, a worm pokes it's head out of her grey/green cheek before ducking back inside
- >She takes no notice of it
- >"Well I might act brainless if I wasn't completely aware of my surroundings. Which reminds me, can I go outside now?"
- "NO! You aren't ready."
- >"For what?"
- "I'm going to turn you into a brutal killing machine, then unleash you on Ponyville and watch in glee as you butcher the innocents!"
- >"Why?"
- "Because when I first got here, they had a party and didn't invite me"
- >She blinks a few times
- >Her eye falls out
- >You pick it up and pop it back in, then watch as it slowly rolls around back into it's original position
- >"That's kinda foalish, Anon"
- "S-shut up."
- >"For an insane hermit necrolord, you're a bit... Beta"
- "SHUT UP. HAVE SOME BREAKFAST"
- >Throw the sack at her
- >It's bloodied contents spill to the floor
- >The intestines of a freshly killed animal pour onto the ston-
- >It's cabbage, alright?
- >You were too scared to kill an innocent animal, so you just stole a cabbage from some hick with a farm hat
- >She was mad as hell
- 2/?
- >Grubs chews on the cabbage in delight
- >You walk over to your table and sit down to work on your newest creation
- >Something more... Compliant with orders
- >Grubs was the first attempt, she's only 3 days old.
- >You dug her up from a nearby cemetery and worked your magic on her
- >When she came around, she didn't know who she was, but was still capable of coherent thought.
- >She finishes her breakfast and trots on over to you, looking over your shoulder while you sit on your tiny wooden stool and scribble some formulas on some paper
- >She slowly swallows her last bit of breakfast and nudges you
- >"Whatcha workin' on?"
- "A new monster. Something that will blindly follow my orders and not answer me back like YOU"
- >Prod her with your quill
- >She smirks
- >"So you want a slave? Wow, I didn't think you were into that kind of stuff"
- "Shush. Or I won't reattach your leg."
- >"When exactly are you going to do that?"
- "When I deem you worthy enough."
- >"..."
- "I-I don't have any more string..."
- >"You going to head into town and steal some again?"
- "Yes."
- >"When?"
- "Right now"
- >"Do it then"
- "I will!"
- >"Go!"
- "I AM DOING!"
- >You stand up and storm out of the basement
- >"AND BRING BACK SOME MORE CABBAGE!"
- >Slam the door shut and lock it
- >Stupid fucking zombie servant not listening to orders
- 3/?
- >Walk through the tall grass towards the town, the sun shining on your neck as you look at your feet while you walk
- >Soon. They'll all perish soon.
- >...That party looked like so much fun
- >You reach the outskirts of town and start sneaking
- >Make a break for the large clothes shop, which is luckily out of the way in terms of other buildings
- >Dive into a bush and look around
- >No one noticed you
- >Reminds you of your romantic life
- >Ha! Good one, brain!
- >Aaaand now you're sad
- >With a glum look upon your mug you peek through a window
- >Observe the shop owner mill about, stitching this and that while seemingly singing to herself
- >Watch her needlework intently
- >You need to learn how to do that. Grubs' leg has fallen off 4 times in the short time she's been alive
- >The damn thing just won't stay on.
- >You're tempted to melt the skin together. Not like she can feel pain
- >She might not approve of you attacking her with fire though
- >Grubs may be a servant, but she's got a mean slapping hoof
- >The shop pony exits the room, leaving a large spool of pink string on the floor
- >You were told her name once, when you got here, but you've already forgotten it
- >It's been like, a year since you got here
- >You've spent most of that time fixing up the hut you found outside town and researching the wonders of necromancy
- >But now is not the time for memories. It's the time for theft
- >You sprint around the side of the shop to the front and burst through the door
- >Grab the string
- >Run your ass out of there before the pony can reappear
- >"Hello? Is any pony there?"
- >Too slow, shop-horse. You're like a phantom
- >Chuckle and scurry towards the tall grass as you have done a hundred times before
- >Turn and look back at the shop window
- >The pony is looking confused
- >Another successful heist
- 4/?
- >You plod through the grass on the way back to your hut, clutching the thread spool in one hand
- >The sounds of birds chirping accompanies you
- >You lazily trudge homewards and pay no mind to the pony that steps out in front of you
- >Wonder why the world is moving so fast
- >Slam down on your front
- >It knocks the wind out of you and your thread goes flying
- >Rub your head and stand up
- >Look at what you tripped over
- >A small yellow pegasus is nursing her leg and looking sorry for herself
- >She sees you and freezes
- >You gulp, not sure what to do
- >Not so stealthy after all, genius
- >The pony slowly takes a step forwards, a nervous look on her face
- >"Umm... H-hello?"
- >Your eyes dart around for the thread
- >Can't find it
- >"I-is this yours?"
- >The pony offers up the spool on her hoof, giving a small smile along with it
- >Snatch it and nod
- "Thankyougoodbye"
- >Take off running back to your hut
- >Grubs will be thrilled to hear about your conversation with the pony
- "So I says to her "Fuck you, you filthy pegasus. Why don't you go back to pegasusdale or whatever the shit that place is called". Fucking Pegasi, right?"
- >Grubs' face is completely deadpan
- >Ironic, given that she's technically dead
- >"That never happened, did it, Anon?"
- "N-no."
- >She sighs and nudges her dismembered limb towards you with her muzzle
- >"Could you please reattach my leg?"
- "Fine, fine... Don't know why I bother talking to you anyway"
- >"Because I'm the only pony you CAN talk to?"
- "Shush."
- 5/?
- >You sit down on your stool and lay Grubs over your lap
- >She goes still and patiently waits for you to stitch her leg back on
- >The worm from before makes a reappearance
- "You gonna get rid of that worm?"
- >"No. I like him"
- "He's gross"
- >"You're a terrible necrolord, you know that?"
- "I'm better than you"
- >"That's not... Whatever."
- >You finish stitching the leg and turn to your undead minion
- "Alright, Grubs. Here's the plan."
- >Jab a finger at the papers on your desk
- "If we're going to level this pathetic town and reforge it in undeath, we'll need these ingredients"
- >She looks over the papers
- >"I have no idea what any of these things mean."
- >You look at the papers
- >It's upside down
- >God dammit
- >Turn it the right way up
- >"Ooooh, that seems easy enough. But uhh, I think this might be a problem."
- >She points at your most critical material
- >Peer at it
- >Scrunch up your nose and look back at her
- "And what -exactly- is so hard about getting hold of twenty five cadavers?"
- >She gives you an "Are you actually serious" look
- "You'll just have to go to the cemetery where I got you!"
- >"...What do you mean 'me'?"
- "You don't seriously think that I'm going to get my hands filthy digging up bodies, do you?""
- >She scowls at you
- >Pat her on the head
- >Her eye falls out
- >Push it back in her skull
- "Good girl. Chop chop! Or I'll kill you and reanimate you."
- >"You won't do that because you don't know how, you bloody ape"
- >Ouch.
- >"And what are you going to be doing anyway?"
- "Getting the other ingredients of course! I'll have to 'neutralise' several targets in order to get them safely, though."
- >"You're going to run into town and steal them again, aren't you?"
- "Yes."
- >"You're not going to hurt a fly, and are instead going to run around screaming if you get caught, aren't you?"
- "Y-yes."
- >"Alright then. When are we doin-"
- >Knock knock knock
- 6/?
- >You stare at your minion
- "...Did you just say 'knock knock knock'?"
- >"No."
- >She turns her head slightly and raises an eyebrow
- >"I... I think you might have a visitor"
- >Your brain struggles to process this
- "What should I do?"
- >Knock knock knock
- >"Probably answer the door."
- "But I've never had a visitor! What should I say?"
- >"I don't know! I've never left this damn basement!"
- "Oh yeah. C-can you come up with me?"
- >"What, so that if things go wrong I can take care of them and tick one cadaver off your list?"
- "Well more as a sort of 'security blanket', but sure, that as well"
- >She shakes her head and trots towards the stairs
- >"The shit I put up with..."
- >Push past her, laughing nervously
- "Uhh, I think I'll take the lead, thank you very much, minion."
- >She rolls her eyes
- >Luckily none of them fall out again
- >You walk upstairs and towards the door
- >Your palms are sweaty
- >Knees weak
- >Arms are heavy
- >Reach it and look back at your minion, who is looking at you from the top of the basement stairs
- >She points a hoof at the door and jerks her head to the side
- >Gulp
- >Open the door
- >Look down
- >The pegasus is there
- >Uh oh
- 7/?
- >You both stare at each other for a good while
- >A gentle breeze drifts on by
- >Shuffle nervously
- "Can I help you?"
- >"Umm... My name is Fluttershy."
- >She takes a step forwards
- >"What's yours?"
- >Look to the left
- >Grubs draws a hoof across her neck then gives you a quizzical look
- >Shake your head
- >Turn back to Fluttershy
- "Anonymous. And I don't want to buy anything. Good bye."
- >Slam the door
- >Lean against it
- >Listen closely
- >Hear a defeated sigh and the flap of wings
- >Grubs tentatively steps out into the kitchen
- >"Is she gone?"
- "I think so"
- >She looks around
- >"So this is where you live... I thought it would have been dirtier"
- "I'll have you know that I'm a very clean person!"
- >"And since when did a necrolord concern himself with keeping things neat and tidy?"
- >She looks towards your expensive dishes that you stole
- >They looked nice and no one else seemed to want them
- >Grubs snickers
- >"Nice plates, oh lord-of-darkness"
- "SHUT UP AND GET BACK IN THE BASEMENT, WHELP"
- >"Nah, I think I'll stay up here. It's been ages since I saw the sun"
- "Fine. Well you can at least help me create my monster while you're up here."
- >"Sounds good. Wait, you wanted me to dig up bodies, so I would have come up here anyway. Why are you so concerned about me-"
- "STOP POKING HOLES IN MY LOGIC. YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO BE FULLY SELF AWARE WHEN I MADE YOU."
- >"Why didn't you just kill me and try again then?"
- "imscaredofblud"
- >"What?"
- "Nothing."
- 8/?
- >You both head down into the basement and plan until nightfall
- >Grubs' stomach growls
- "How do you even get hungry?"
- >"It's plant matter or you, milord. Choose which one or else I will"
- "Okay! Fine! We'll steal some apples on the way to the graveyard"
- >"So you're coming with me then?"
- "I need to make sure you don't get the wrong kind of bodies"
- >She squints at you
- >"That's a terrible excuse. What's the real reason?"
- >...
- "No reason at all. Don't question my authority."
- >She mustn't know that you're also scared of the dark.
- >You both fetch some spades and head out of the front door, a full moon hangs overhead, occasionally being shrouded by clouds
- >A cold wind chills you to the bone
- >Grubs just seems thrilled to be outside
- >"I forgot how nice it is out here!"
- "Zombies can't appreciate beauty. Stop trying to."
- >She sticks her tongue out at you
- >It's all rotten and covered in scabs
- >Eww
- >The darkness is giving you the heeby-jeebies, so you pick up the pace towards the cemetery
- >Grubs trots along behind you obediently
- >"Isn't this nice? No one's giving each other orders. Just you, me, the moon and a plan."
- "Ugh. Be quiet, or I'll give you an order."
- >"You just did, then"
- >God dammit.
- >Reach the graveyard. Tombstones and statues cover the small hill
- >Walk up to the peak and survey your surroundings
- >Look down at a marked grave
- >"Here lies Yellow Belly. Father, Husband, Beloved Coward"
- "And now he's gonna be a monster."
- >Drive your spade into the soft earth and begin the unholy harvest
- 9/?
- >5 hours and a lot of panting later, you and Grubs lie with your backs against a tombstone
- >Look at the 25 bodies you managed to uncover
- "Well, we did that in record time."
- >"There was a record for digging up dead bodies?"
- "Shut up"
- >Grubs clicks her tongue
- >"So how are we gonna get them back to the shack without anyone seeing? It's nearly dawn."
- >Look around
- >It does look like it's getting lighter
- >Peer at your shack, located at the other side of town
- >Critical mission error.
- >Look around in a sudden panic
- >Squint at something lying in the road
- >Scramble to your feet and run down to inspect it, Grubs following you with a nonchalant expression
- >"I don't think I've ever seen you run that fast bef-"
- "SHUT UP."
- >You run a hand over the wooden cart lying on it's side
- >With some effort, you push it back on it's wheels
- >Seems sturdy enough
- >Turn to your undead abomination
- "Alright, I have a plan. But it -might- be a bit risky"
- 10/?
- >"Anon. This is insane."
- "Shush! No one has stopped us yet!"
- >You walk through Ponyville, pulling the cart behind you
- >A large sheet hastily stitched together with pink thread and burial wraps covers the mountain of corpses in your cart
- >2 fillies run around in front of you, laughing
- >You feel your brow getting sweaty
- >Glance at Grubs
- >She's wearing something that looks like an Islamic burqa
- >Only it's white, covered in dirt and smells like death
- >You're half-way through the town, and the sun has just come up
- >Ponies are early birds, so there are already a great number of them walking around minding their own business
- >Your arms feel like lead from pulling this thing
- >But it will all be worth it!
- >God help you if you get caught
- >"Hello there, Anonymous!"
- >Freeze
- >Look at the yellow pegasus, hovering next to you
- >She smiles sheepishly
- >"I don't think I've ever seen you around town before... W-would you like me to show you around?"
- "Uhh, no, thank you. I know my way around quite well"
- >Hoist the cart's handles to get a better grip and carry on pulling, your feet carrying you faster due to nerves
- >Fluttershy doesn't let up, and flies after you
- >"Would you like some help? I mean, if you want, that is."
- "Quite fine."
- >"I l-like your clothes..."
- "Thank you."
- >"But why are they covered in mud?"
- >Look down
- >You forgot that you're covered it mud, sweat and grime from your most recent cadaver heist
- "Uhhh-"
- >"We're mud farmers!"
- >Based Grubs.
- 11/?
- >Grubs hops down from her perch just behind you
- >She walks up to Fluttershy and grabs her hoof, shaking it vigorously
- >Fluttershy is clearly shaken
- >"Oh-uhm. I-I, I'm Fluttershy..."
- >Grubs laughs
- >"Pleasure to meet you, Fluttershy! I'm sure you've met Anon before, I'm his... Uhh, wife. Rote Ing."
- >Fluttershy cocks her name
- >"That's a um... Odd name..."
- >Grubs nods solemnly
- >"Yes, that it is. My parents were..."
- >She trails off
- >Then looks at you
- "They were... Crack addicts!"
- >Both ponies stare at you
- >Fluttershy is the first to speak
- >"Umm. Crack?"
- >Shit. They don't have crack in Equestria
- "Oh yes, dangerous and horrible drug from far away. Made you crazy. They were addicting to the stuff and gave their daughter a rubbish name, haha!"
- >Grubs catches on, and places a hoof on your leg
- >"Yes! That's right! But Anon looked past that and saw me for who I am and so now we are husband and wife!"
- >You both give Fluttershy the fakest smiles imaginable
- >She's rather unnerved
- >"Oh... Umm... Okay. Married? Oh..."
- >She gets a glum look and flies away
- >Grubs smiles up at you
- >Well, you THINK she's smiling. Can't see because of the burqa
- >"Nice thinking, Anon. We're on the home stretch. Now get us home."
- "Yes, Ma'am"
- >Pick up the cart
- >Realise what you just said
- "I mean, minion. SHUT UP!"
- >Grumble as Grubs laughs at you
- >Drag the cart all the way to the outskirts of the town, surprisingly, no one else bothered you
- >Grubs looks back at the town as you leave it
- >"Well I'll be. That wasn't so bad at all!"
- >She takes off her headscarf. He rotting face on show to no one but the sun and the birds
- >You can almost hear her smiling
- >"H-hello again"
- >You can almost hear her yelping and cramming her head back inside the cloth
- >Chuckle
- >Silly Grubs.
- 11/?
- >Turn your head as you pull the cart up the path and look at Fluttershy
- >"Um. I know you said that you're uhh, married. But do you think it would maybe be possible if you could be so kind as to consider maybe umm..."
- >She starts getting flustered and flies off
- >Look over at Grubs
- >She shrugs and cautiously moves a hoof to pull off her headscarf again
- >"Okay, I'll t-try again"
- >Grubs lets out a groan
- >Fluttershy, once more, hovers alongside you
- >"Umm. I've been thinking about you ever since we met that day!"
- "Okay."
- >"I-it's like fate planted us on the same path!"
- "Ya-huh"
- >"B-but I know that your wife won't be too pleased. So umm"
- >She moves in uncomfortably close, seemingly unphased by the smell of death surrounding you
- >...Oh hey, that might explain why no one else came near you. And why people were shutting their doors and windows when you walked on by
- >Awesome
- >Fluttershy whispers in your ear
- >"W-we could keep it a secret. D-does that sound like fun?"
- >Remove a hand from a handle and push her away
- "Sounds lovely. But I errr."
- >Look over at the hideous zombie wearing a burqa, who is also probably laughing silently at you
- "I... Love my... Wife?"
- >As expected, Grubs snickers
- >"I love you too, darling. Maybe we can have some fun tonight"
- >OH GOD WHY
- >You feel your stomach do a back flip at the thought
- >Fluttershy's eyes widen
- >"F-fun? Do you mean like..."
- >She looks left and right then whispers again
- >"Sex?"
- >Grubs doesn't even hide her guffaw
- >You sigh
- "Yes. Sex. With my wife."
- >Shudder
- >Fluttershy blushes heavily
- >"Ohmygoodness. I-I've never talked about sex before!"
- >She moves in close
- >"Umm. What's it like?"
- >Hell if you know. You were hardly a womaniser back home
- >Grubs is in hysterics
- >"He-... Jusgimmieasec... He's a real monster in bed!"
- >Fluttershy 'ooos'
- >You feel your rage building
- 12/?
- >Grubs continues
- >"This one time, he was boning me so hard, I thought I would..."
- >She squeaks and tries to compose herself for the incredibly predictable and unfunny punchline
- >"I-I thought I would. DIE!"
- >She thrashes around on the pile, screaming with laughter
- "You know, DARLING. You're quite FUNNY."
- >Grubs chokes on her own laughter
- >"I-I know I am, dear! That's why I do it! After all, comedy is your fetish!"
- >More laughter
- >Sigh and look at Fluttershy
- >She's giving you a bizarre look
- >"It's... Your fetish?"
- "Uhhh-"
- >"I-is that what turns you on? Comedy?"
- "I-"
- >"Oh my... Umm. W-will you be at home later today?"
- >Grubs descends into more laughter
- >"Of course he will! He's a real basement dweller!"
- >You spend a few seconds listening to her laugh
- >Just then you hear a loud rip
- >Grubs goes silent
- >Smirk
- "You alright back there, honey?"
- >"F-fine."
- "Good."
- >Turn to Fluttershy
- "Don't mind my wife. She's 'armless."
- >Snicker
- >"YOU'RE HILARIOUS, ANON."
- >Fluttershy is just staring at you
- >"S-so will you like me if I make you laugh?"
- "I really don't think-"
- >"G-gotta go. See you later!"
- >And she's gone
- >The shack is drawing nearer, though. So that's lucky
- >Open the door and help Grubs down
- "I told you to be careful with that thing. You nearly blew our cover!"
- >"Sorry..."
- >Wow. She sounds genuinely apologetic for once
- >She smiles up at you
- >"Hehe, blow our -cover-"
- >She tugs on her burqa
- >"Get it?"
- >Shake your head
- "Shut up and help me unload these things"
- >You can't help but smile though.
- 13/?
- >Finish unloading the bodies and storing them in the basement
- >Dust your hands off and stare at the pile of bodies now resting in your basement
- >Grubs is also looking
- >"Shouldn't we like, store them in ice?"
- "Ehh, they'll be fine. What's the worst that could happen?"
- >"A bad smell?"
- "Right! And it's not like anyone ever comes here-"
- >Knock knock knock
- >...
- "Just in case, that wasn't you?"
- >"Go answer the door, you big goof."
- "Ugh."
- >Plod upstairs and throw open the front door
- >Fluttershy smiles up at you
- >In a clown costume
- >"A-ahem"
- >She begins dancing around madly, singing a song and honking her big red nose
- >Then she strikes a pose and a flower on her chest sprays water at you
- >"Ta daa! A-are you laughing?"
- >Glare down at her
- >You'd think she would have noticed half way through your act
- >"Anon? Who is it?"
- "Just a clown, Gr- uh, Rotey!"
- >"Should we ki- invite her in?"
- "That's a horrible id-"
- >Fluttershy's face has lighten up
- >"Oh my! I'd love to come inside you!"
- >What
- >"Y-your house, I mean."
- >She lets herself in
- >Oh shit
- >Run ahead of her and into your kitchen
- >Just in time to see Grubs lock herself in the basement, giving you a pained look and mouthing "good luck"
- >At least she's protecting the corpses
- >Fluttershy takes a seat at your kitchen table and smiles at you
- >Her nose wrinkles up
- >"Oh! There's umm... Quite a smell in here!"
- "Uhh yeah. It's the plumbing."
- 14/?
- >Neither of you say anything to each other for a few moments
- >Fluttershy breaks the silence
- >"S-so! Umm, w-what do you do?"
- "I'm a mud farmer, remember?"
- >"Oh yes! Sorry!"
- >She smiles
- >Then loses the smile
- >"What's a mud farmer?"
- "It's like... A... Rock farmer. But with... Mud?"
- >God, you're stupid.
- >"Oh! My friend Pinkie was a rock farmer!"
- >YOU GOT LUCKY, ANON.
- "Riiiight! And that's what I do! I farm. Mud."
- >Fake smiles all round
- >Fluttershy gets off her chair and walks up to you
- >"S-so a mud farmer must make a lot of money!"
- "Well, I-"
- >"So you have a big house!"
- >It's a tiny shack.
- >"And some spare room for... 'Extra' company?"
- >She winks
- "Don't you know I have a wife? I thought I made that clear"
- >"But she's not here right now!"
- "Actually she's in the-"
- >NO NO NO
- "Sheee's... In town!"
- >Fluttershy grins
- >"Then we're all alone!"
- >She takes a step forwards
- >"Out here..."
- >Another
- >"All."
- >And another
- >"Alone."
- >ROMANTIC COMEDIES DIDN'T PREPARE YOU FOR THIS KIND OF SCENARIO
- >Or did they?
- >You think back to some romantic comedies you watched in the past
- >"What's the deal with airline food?"
- >NOW ISN'T THE TIME, SEINFELD. YOU AREN'T EVEN ROMANTIC.
- >This kiss is romantic, though. Fluttershy's lips are awfully soft
- >...
- 15/?
- >Pull back, breaking the kiss
- >"Ohh~. Our first kiss! Wasn't that passionate, Anonymous? I KNEw that we were meant to be!"
- "Uhhhhh"
- >"W-we can start a family! You just ditch that smelly pony and move in with me!"
- "Uhhhhhhhh"
- >She drops her voice to a whisper
- >"We can even have... Sex"
- >She squeaks upon saying the word
- "M-me. Wife. Hav-"
- >"Yes! I WILL wife you, Anon! This day is a dream come true!"
- >Your front door opens
- >Grubs steps in, her burqa now on again
- >"Why hello there, living- Uh, I mean, loving husband! And Fluttershy too! How are you?"
- >Fluttershy blushes and steps back
- >"O-oh, I was just. Umm. Leaving."
- >She winks at you and whispers in your ear
- >"We can keep it a secret! Just you and me!"
- >She wink again and skedaddles out the front door
- >Grubs kicks it shut with a rear leg and tears off her headscarf
- >"What the hell, Anon? You're letting random ponies kiss you now?"
- "I don't know what happened! I swear!"
- >"You're so... BETA!"
- "YOU'RE NOT THE BOSS OF ME. YOU'RE JUST A MINION!"
- >"I'm more pony than you can handle, mister. You almost disrupted our operations. If I hadn't had come in, who knows what might have happened!"
- "Yeah, how DID you get in?"
- >"There's a trap door leading from the basement to the surface, behind the shack"
- >Oh yeah
- >That would have been easier to use for dumping the bodies in
- "Look, I don't like how this pony is getting close to discovering our plot. So let's just get it done, okay?"
- >Grubs smiles
- >"'Our' plot, Anon?"
- "My plot! MINE!"
- >Storm past her and into the basement
- >Grubs calls after you
- >"Anon, I'm hungry!"
- "THERE'S STUFF IN THE FRIDGE, YOU MONGOLOID."
- >...
- >"Oh my god there's stuff in the fridge! Why didn't you tell me this before!"
- "I JUST TOLD YOU!"
- >"Where are the apples?"
- "THEY'RE IN THE FUCKING FRIDGE!"
- >"You said there would be apples!"
- "JUST CHECK THE FRIDGE YOU... YOU... DOUBLE ZOMBIE."
- 16/?
- >You really suck at insults sometimes.
- >Grubs manages to find some apples and trots down into the basement, look pleased with herself
- >"So. Shall we get to work?"
- "Well no, we still need the other ingredients"
- >"You mean these?"
- >She walks over to a small box and brings it back, placing it on your desk
- >It's full of small vials and dead plants
- "How did you..."
- >"When you showed me the list of things we needed, I knew that I'd seem them somewhere"
- "But how?"
- >"I LIVE down here, you idiot."
- "Oh yeah."
- >Stare the ingredients
- "We can make it, now. The monster, I mean"
- >You're quiet for a while
- >"You okay, Anon?"
- "I dunno. You ever have second thoughts?"
- >"Nope. I'm 4 days old. I haven't had to time to have second thoughts yet."
- "You're a great therapist"
- >"Thanks, 'husband'"
- >Shudder
- "Don't ever call me that again"
- >"Aww, can't handle the thought of loving me?"
- "You're hideous"
- >"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder"
- "That's an excuse ugly people use to make themselves feel less ugly"
- >"You're not much of a looker yourself, mister hairless ape."
- >You bicker like this for 2 hours.
- 17/?
- "Weren't we supposed to be making a monster?"
- >"I'll get the plans, you get the bodies"
- "Why do I have to get the bodies?"
- >"Don't be a foal, Anon."
- >Sulk and drag the first body over here
- >Raise your bone saw and pink thread
- >Grubs returns and places the plans in front of you
- "Ready?"
- >"Ready."
- "Let's make us a monster.
- >You work all through the day and all through the night
- >Hacking through bones, flesh and gristle, you steadily piece together a creature of horrific proportions
- >Unlike Grubs, this thing shouldn't be too self aware
- >You stitch on the final limb
- "Is... Is that it?"
- >"That was the last body part we had. I think it's ready."
- >You stare at the amalgamation of flesh and bone
- >It's basically a pony
- >Made of other ponies
- >It touches the ceiling, and looks like something out a Tim Burton movie
- >Pink thread holds it all together, making it look kinda funny in a way
- >But still terrifying
- >Grubs prods you
- >"We still need to add the mixture"
- >Reach for the hollow needle and jam it into where you put the creature's 25 hearts
- >Begin pumping the vile liquid into the monster
- >Watch it in silence
- >Grubs scratches her leg
- >You sniff
- >"You'd think it would be a bit more, exciting"
- "Gotta wait for it to move first"
- >"Alright"
- >Several minutes pass
- >Eventually, the liquid runs dry
- >"What now?"
- >Flick through your 'Necromancy for Foals' book
- "According to this, we need a massive jolt of electricity-
- >The creature moves slightly
- >Stare at it
- >Throw the book over your shoulder
- "Welp. Books have been wrong before"
- >Clear your throat
- "IT'S ALIIIIIIIIIVE!"
- 18/?
- >The monster shifts and groans as it comes to life
- >You look on with a huge smile on your face
- >It picks itself up off the floor and groans again, louder this time
- >"MEE... HUNGRY..."
- >Grubs laughs
- >"Awww. He's like a big baby!"
- >Nod
- "A big baby with a lot of killing potential!"
- >You clap your hands excitedly
- >"You look like a filly on hearts warming eve."
- "I don't care! This is so exciting!"
- >The beast shakes it's head
- >"ME HUNGRY. MASTER HELP?"
- >It even thinks that you're it's master
- >FUCKING. GOLDMINE.
- "Ahem, Yes! I AM ANONYMOUS, BEAST! I CREATED YOU FOR ONE PURPOSE."
- >The monster cocks it's head
- "WE ARE GOING TO DESTROY PONYVILLE!"
- >The basement door is obliterated
- >A creature the size of the shack you're living in crawls out of it, you and Grubs riding on it's back
- >"MUST. CRUSH."
- "Ahahahah!"
- >Grubs has her hooves wrapped around your waist
- >The monster, you have now named "Jonathan" carries you into town like a noble steed
- >That has a limited vocabulary
- "YES, JONATHAN! ANNIHILATE THE LESSER BEINGS!"
- >Jonathan roars and crushes a house, the ponies inside, outside, and all around Ponyville are now screaming
- >A siren blares as your creature howls in excitement
- >It thinks that everything is a big game.
- >"LITTLE PONY GO SMASH SMASH!"
- 19/?
- >Bricks and other stones from the more courageous ponies bounce harmlessly off his hide, and only serve to send him into a more frenzied state
- >Due to his size, unicorns can't effect him with magic
- >Until, that is, a large purple bolt slams into his shoulder
- >Bits of bile and flesh splatter all over you and Grubs as a large hole is created in Jonathan
- >He roars, his rage enhanced to levels you cannot even imagine
- >A small purple Alicorn stands in the middle of the street just below you
- >A confident smirk on her face, and her horn at the ready
- >"My name is Twilight Sparkle! And I am here to-"
- >SPLAT.
- >Jonathan's leg pummels her into the dirt
- >He stamps on her body over and over again until she's a mass of bloodied meat sponge
- >You shrug
- >Not like anyone will miss her
- >Fucking Alicorns
- >He continues his rampage around Ponyville, shrugging off any other punishment and generally being a nuisance
- >You think about what you're going to have for dinner tonight while he tears down the town hall in a fit of bloodrage
- >His screams piece the smoke filled air
- >Grubs taps you on the shoulder
- "Yeah?"
- >"Guess who."
- >Feel another tap
- >Fluttershy is hovering next to you
- >Rub your eyes and blink
- "Uhh."
- >"H-hello again! It's me, Fluttershy! In case you forgot... Umm, listen, I know you're a teeny tiny bit busy at the moment, but I was wondering if you wanted to go out on d-date sometime? Maybe in my house? Right now?"
- >She blushes
- >Look back at Grubs
- "Is this pony serious?"
- >She shrugs
- >"Looks like it."
- >Fluttershy patiently awaits an answer, she ducks to narrowly avoid a flying piece of building
- >"S-so is that a yes?"
- "No. No it's not."
- >"Aww... Well that's okay. Maybe tomorrow then?"
- >She flies away, oblivious to the carnage around her
- >Jonathan cocks his leg over the ruins of the town hall
- "Hey, HEY! NO! BAD! DOWN, JONATHAN"
- >"ME SORRY, MASTER."
- >Grubs tightens her grip around your waist
- >"So what are we eating tonight?
- "I dunno. Apples?"
- >She rests her head on your back
- >"Sounds good..."
- 20/20
- The End.
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