>Be 9
>In primary school
>Doing cooking project
>Teacher tells us that for homework we need to make a sandwhich with our parents
>Go home
>Don't tell parents beecasue I can't be bothered cooking
>Sleep
>Next day
>Worried that I'll be yelled at for not doing anything
>Can't think of what to do
>Need to shit
>An idea comes to me
>Take a couple slices of bread
>Spread butter on them
>Take a shit in them
>Mix jam in the shit
>Put some lettuce on top
>Close the slices of bread against eachother
>Made my sandwhich
>In class
>Teacher tells us to take out our sandwhiches
>We take them out, techer asks me what mine is
>I say it's nutella with jam and lettuce
>We're told to share our sandwhiches with the person next to us and rate them
>Give my sandwhich to kid next to me and vice versa
>We're now told to eat them
>Eat his sandwhich. Not bad, not good but not bad.
>Kid complains that mine stinks
>Teahcer tells him to stop being mean and that I put a lot of effort to make that sandwhich
>I laugh on the inside
>He reluctantly takes a bite
>He chews slowly then stops. He spasses out and spits the food everywhere
>Starts to vomit on the table
>Teacher comes over and checks my sandwhich
>Smells it
>She recoils in horror, now realizing what I have done
>Her face when
>See kid crying his eyes out
>Get expelled for two days