bolon1

Eng Austin Powers In Goldmember

Oct 19th, 2018
378
0
Never
Not a member of Pastebin yet? Sign Up, it unlocks many cool features!
text 101.83 KB | None | 0 0
  1. 1
  2. 00:00:45,690 --> 00:01:08,380
  3. [BEEPING]
  4.  
  5. 2
  6. 00:01:24,730 --> 00:01:26,020
  7. [GUNFIRE]
  8.  
  9. 3
  10. 00:02:10,980 --> 00:02:12,320
  11. Yeah, baby.
  12.  
  13. 4
  14. 00:02:30,630 --> 00:02:33,670
  15. Hi, I'm Dixie. Dixie Normous.
  16.  
  17. 5
  18. 00:02:36,510 --> 00:02:40,430
  19. l may just be a small-town
  20. FBI agent-slash-single mother...
  21.  
  22. 6
  23. 00:02:40,680 --> 00:02:43,510
  24. ...but I'm still tough and sexy.
  25.  
  26. 7
  27. 00:02:44,140 --> 00:02:48,690
  28. Well, Miss Normous, shall we shag now...
  29.  
  30. 8
  31. 00:02:48,850 --> 00:02:50,100
  32. ...or shag later?
  33.  
  34. 9
  35. 00:02:50,270 --> 00:02:53,360
  36. Oh, Austin, behave.
  37.  
  38. 10
  39. 00:02:57,490 --> 00:02:59,160
  40. Hey, Powers.
  41.  
  42. 11
  43. 00:03:00,530 --> 00:03:02,160
  44. You better watch your frigging self...
  45.  
  46. 12
  47. 00:03:02,330 --> 00:03:06,750
  48. ...because this is one doctor
  49. who does make house calls.
  50.  
  51. 13
  52. 00:03:09,960 --> 00:03:11,960
  53. Right, Mini Me?
  54.  
  55. 14
  56. 00:03:12,340 --> 00:03:14,380
  57. Hey, assholes.
  58.  
  59. 15
  60. 00:03:16,670 --> 00:03:20,890
  61. I'm right over here. I'm Mini Me.
  62. Come and get me.
  63.  
  64. 16
  65. 00:03:24,390 --> 00:03:26,390
  66. [BOTH LAUGHING MANIACALLY]
  67.  
  68. 17
  69. 00:03:28,640 --> 00:03:30,060
  70. MAN 1:
  71. And cut.
  72.  
  73. 18
  74. 00:03:30,310 --> 00:03:32,060
  75. That's a cut, everybody.
  76.  
  77. 19
  78. 00:03:32,230 --> 00:03:34,270
  79. MAN 2:
  80. Moving on. Check the gate, please.
  81.  
  82. 20
  83. 00:03:37,900 --> 00:03:40,070
  84. So, Austin, what'd you think
  85. of the opening credits?
  86.  
  87. 21
  88. 00:03:40,240 --> 00:03:42,410
  89. Well, l can't believe
  90. Sir Steven Spielberg...
  91.  
  92. 22
  93. 00:03:42,570 --> 00:03:44,910
  94. ...the grooviest filmmaker
  95. in the history of cinema...
  96.  
  97. 23
  98. 00:03:45,080 --> 00:03:48,080
  99. ...is making a movie about my life.
  100.  
  101. 24
  102. 00:03:48,250 --> 00:03:50,620
  103. Very shagadelic, baby. Yeah.
  104.  
  105. 25
  106. 00:03:50,790 --> 00:03:52,460
  107. [LAUGHS]
  108.  
  109. 26
  110. 00:03:52,630 --> 00:03:55,920
  111. Having said that,
  112. l do have some thoughts.
  113.  
  114. 27
  115. 00:03:56,090 --> 00:03:57,590
  116. SPIELBERG:
  117. Really?
  118.  
  119. 28
  120. 00:03:57,760 --> 00:04:01,510
  121. Uh, my friend here
  122. thinks it's fine the way it is.
  123.  
  124. 29
  125. 00:04:01,680 --> 00:04:03,680
  126. Well, no offense, Sir Stevie...
  127.  
  128. 30
  129. 00:04:03,850 --> 00:04:07,680
  130. ...but you've got to have mojo, baby.
  131. Yeah.
  132.  
  133. 31
  134. 00:04:07,930 --> 00:04:09,430
  135. Hit it.
  136.  
  137. 32
  138. 00:04:09,600 --> 00:04:11,600
  139. ["'SOUL BOSSA NOVA"' PLAYING]
  140.  
  141. 33
  142. 00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:57,940
  143. [PANTS]
  144.  
  145. 34
  146. 00:05:19,300 --> 00:05:21,510
  147. Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Quincy Jones.
  148.  
  149. 35
  150. 00:05:24,840 --> 00:05:26,680
  151. Yeah.
  152.  
  153. 36
  154. 00:05:29,770 --> 00:05:33,390
  155. This is where the movie
  156. gets its mojo, baby.
  157.  
  158. 37
  159. 00:05:33,560 --> 00:05:35,770
  160. Groovy, yes.
  161.  
  162. 38
  163. 00:05:49,120 --> 00:05:51,330
  164. MAN:
  165. Quiet, everybody. Music video, take two.
  166.  
  167. 39
  168. 00:05:51,500 --> 00:05:53,160
  169. It's Britney Spears.
  170.  
  171. 40
  172. 00:05:54,000 --> 00:05:56,000
  173. [SPEARS Slinging "BOYS"]
  174.  
  175. 41
  176. 00:06:41,420 --> 00:06:42,590
  177. [GROWLS]
  178.  
  179. 42
  180. 00:06:45,090 --> 00:06:49,890
  181. Oops, l did it again, baby. Yeah.
  182.  
  183. 43
  184. 00:06:58,150 --> 00:07:00,150
  185. [CHEERING]
  186.  
  187. 44
  188. 00:07:00,610 --> 00:07:02,270
  189. WOMAN:
  190. l love you!
  191.  
  192. 45
  193. 00:07:15,120 --> 00:07:16,790
  194. Yeah.
  195.  
  196. 46
  197. 00:07:35,220 --> 00:07:37,770
  198. Welcome back, Herr Doctor.
  199. How was space?
  200.  
  201. 47
  202. 00:07:37,930 --> 00:07:40,770
  203. Space was cool. Wasn't it, Mini Me?
  204.  
  205. 48
  206. 00:07:40,940 --> 00:07:42,560
  207. -Mm-hm.
  208. -Yeah.
  209.  
  210. 49
  211. 00:07:42,730 --> 00:07:44,730
  212. Dr. Evil, while you were in space...
  213.  
  214. 50
  215. 00:07:44,900 --> 00:07:48,490
  216. ...I created a way for us to make
  217. huge sums of legitimate money...
  218.  
  219. 51
  220. 00:07:48,650 --> 00:07:52,240
  221. ...and still maintain the ethics
  222. and the business practices...
  223.  
  224. 52
  225. 00:07:52,410 --> 00:07:54,240
  226. ...of an evil organization.
  227.  
  228. 53
  229. 00:07:54,410 --> 00:07:58,830
  230. l have turned us into a talent agency:
  231. The Hollywood Talent Agency.
  232.  
  233. 54
  234. 00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:02,000
  235. -Really?
  236. -By charging A-list clients 9 percent...
  237.  
  238. 55
  239. 00:08:02,170 --> 00:08:05,590
  240. ...rather than the traditional 10 percent,
  241. we've been able to sign such stars...
  242.  
  243. 56
  244. 00:08:05,750 --> 00:08:07,300
  245. -...as George Clooney...
  246. -Ooh.
  247.  
  248. 57
  249. 00:08:07,460 --> 00:08:09,170
  250. TWO: ...Julia Roberts...
  251. -Hey.
  252.  
  253. 58
  254. 00:08:09,340 --> 00:08:10,930
  255. ...and Leo DiCaprio.
  256.  
  257. 59
  258. 00:08:11,090 --> 00:08:12,430
  259. [WHISPERS]
  260. Leo.
  261.  
  262. 60
  263. 00:08:12,590 --> 00:08:17,350
  264. And the best part of the whole scheme
  265. is we all get our own assistants.
  266.  
  267. 61
  268. 00:08:17,520 --> 00:08:19,350
  269. Hi, I'm Number Three.
  270.  
  271. 62
  272. 00:08:19,520 --> 00:08:21,310
  273. [YELLS]
  274. Whoa!
  275.  
  276. 63
  277. 00:08:21,730 --> 00:08:24,610
  278. I’m really excited to be part of the team
  279. here at HTA.
  280.  
  281. 64
  282. 00:08:24,770 --> 00:08:26,440
  283. Very impressive, Number Two...
  284.  
  285. 65
  286. 00:08:27,440 --> 00:08:30,530
  287. ...but I finally have the perfect plan.
  288.  
  289. 66
  290. 00:08:31,860 --> 00:08:34,320
  291. In the '70s, there lived
  292. a Dutch metallurgical hedonist...
  293.  
  294. 67
  295. 00:08:34,490 --> 00:08:35,990
  296. ...by the name of Johann van der Smut.
  297.  
  298. 68
  299. 00:08:36,160 --> 00:08:37,200
  300. [YAWNS]
  301.  
  302. 69
  303. 00:08:37,370 --> 00:08:38,540
  304. He loved gold so much...
  305.  
  306. 70
  307. 00:08:38,700 --> 00:08:42,000
  308. ...he even lost his genitalia
  309. in an unfortunate smelting accident.
  310.  
  311. 71
  312. 00:08:42,170 --> 00:08:44,080
  313. Hence the name...
  314.  
  315. 72
  316. 00:08:44,380 --> 00:08:45,630
  317. ...Goldmember.
  318.  
  319. 73
  320. 00:08:45,790 --> 00:08:46,840
  321. [SNORING]
  322.  
  323. 74
  324. 00:08:47,000 --> 00:08:48,960
  325. He invented a cold-fusion power unit...
  326.  
  327. 75
  328. 00:08:49,130 --> 00:08:52,050
  329. ...for a "tractor beam"--
  330.  
  331. 76
  332. 00:08:53,220 --> 00:08:54,800
  333. "Tractor beam"...
  334.  
  335. 77
  336. 00:08:55,010 --> 00:08:57,350
  337. ...powerful enough
  338. to pull a meteor to Earth.
  339.  
  340. 78
  341. 00:08:57,510 --> 00:08:58,970
  342. The meteor was called...
  343.  
  344. 79
  345. 00:08:59,600 --> 00:09:01,890
  346. ..."Midas 22."
  347.  
  348. 80
  349. 00:09:02,560 --> 00:09:04,060
  350. It’s made of solid gold.
  351.  
  352. 81
  353. 00:09:04,230 --> 00:09:05,690
  354. [WHISPERS]
  355. Is he sleeping?
  356.  
  357. 82
  358. 00:09:06,230 --> 00:09:07,570
  359. Well, that's okay.
  360.  
  361. 83
  362. 00:09:07,730 --> 00:09:09,280
  363. l guess Mini Me won't get any...
  364.  
  365. 84
  366. 00:09:09,440 --> 00:09:11,110
  367. [YELLS]
  368. ...chocolate!
  369.  
  370. 85
  371. 00:09:11,280 --> 00:09:12,860
  372. [LAUGHS]
  373.  
  374. 86
  375. 00:09:13,030 --> 00:09:16,240
  376. You want down, Mini Me?
  377. Use your words like a big boy clone.
  378.  
  379. 87
  380. 00:09:16,990 --> 00:09:18,330
  381. [MINI ME GRUNTS]
  382.  
  383. 88
  384. 00:09:20,000 --> 00:09:21,660
  385. He's okay.
  386.  
  387. 89
  388. 00:09:23,710 --> 00:09:24,920
  389. Here's the chocolate.
  390.  
  391. 90
  392. 00:09:25,080 --> 00:09:28,250
  393. It’s from Bruges. That's in Belgium.
  394.  
  395. 91
  396. 00:09:28,460 --> 00:09:30,630
  397. That's where Daddy's from. Yeah.
  398.  
  399. 92
  400. 00:09:32,260 --> 00:09:33,920
  401. [BOTH LAUGH]
  402.  
  403. 93
  404. 00:09:35,300 --> 00:09:36,760
  405. Check out Mini Me.
  406.  
  407. 94
  408. 00:09:36,930 --> 00:09:40,600
  409. Yeah. He's gone mental
  410. on account of the chocolate.
  411.  
  412. 95
  413. 00:09:40,770 --> 00:09:43,430
  414. It’s like fricking catnip for clones.
  415.  
  416. 96
  417. 00:09:45,440 --> 00:09:46,810
  418. -Your chair, Dr. Evil.
  419. -Thank you.
  420.  
  421. 97
  422. 00:09:46,980 --> 00:09:48,610
  423. Whoa!
  424.  
  425. 98
  426. 00:09:51,690 --> 00:09:53,610
  427. [SPEAKS GIBBERISH]
  428.  
  429. 99
  430. 00:09:58,700 --> 00:10:00,950
  431. Thanks. Skedaddle. Right.
  432.  
  433. 100
  434. 00:10:01,120 --> 00:10:02,700
  435. You know, when you have kids...
  436.  
  437. 101
  438. 00:10:02,870 --> 00:10:05,660
  439. ...I think you're gonna find
  440. that all kids are different, eh?
  441.  
  442. 102
  443. 00:10:05,830 --> 00:10:07,920
  444. [FARBISSINA AND EVIL
  445. SPEAKING IN GERMAN]
  446.  
  447. 103
  448. 00:10:11,460 --> 00:10:14,470
  449. For example, Mini Me loves chocolate.
  450.  
  451. 104
  452. 00:10:14,630 --> 00:10:15,970
  453. Scotty don't.
  454.  
  455. 105
  456. 00:10:16,130 --> 00:10:18,300
  457. -What, l like chocolate fine, l just--
  458. -Scotty don't.
  459.  
  460. 106
  461. 00:10:18,470 --> 00:10:21,640
  462. Well, this is very familiar. Hang on,
  463. let me do what l do. "Uh, would you stop?"
  464.  
  465. 107
  466. 00:10:21,810 --> 00:10:22,970
  467. [EVIL MUTTERING INDISTINCTLY]
  468.  
  469. 108
  470. 00:10:23,140 --> 00:10:24,480
  471. How about I what?
  472.  
  473. 109
  474. 00:10:24,850 --> 00:10:26,390
  475. SCOTT:
  476. What are you...?
  477.  
  478. 110
  479. 00:10:26,560 --> 00:10:29,310
  480. l don't even-- Honestly, isn't this--?
  481.  
  482. 111
  483. 00:10:29,480 --> 00:10:32,020
  484. How about you don't?
  485. Ladies and gentlemen, Scotty Don't.
  486.  
  487. 112
  488. 00:10:32,190 --> 00:10:36,740
  489. Ahem. Dr. Evil, perhaps it's time
  490. that you finished unveiling your plan.
  491.  
  492. 113
  493. 00:10:36,910 --> 00:10:40,320
  494. Yes, thank you, Number Two.
  495. Ladies and gentlemen, my plan is--
  496.  
  497. 114
  498. 00:10:40,490 --> 00:10:43,240
  499. -Scotty don't.
  500. -Come on. You're such a lame-ass.
  501.  
  502. 115
  503. 00:10:43,410 --> 00:10:45,410
  504. [SPEAKING IN FRENCH]
  505.  
  506. 116
  507. 00:10:48,500 --> 00:10:49,670
  508. -Oh.
  509. EVIL: Oh.
  510.  
  511. 117
  512. 00:10:49,830 --> 00:10:52,380
  513. -Oh.
  514. -Oh.
  515.  
  516. 118
  517. 00:10:52,550 --> 00:10:53,630
  518. -Yeah.
  519. SCOTT: Oh, this is--
  520.  
  521. 119
  522. 00:10:53,800 --> 00:10:56,090
  523. -Yeah, yeah.
  524. SCOTT: Oh, so we're--
  525.  
  526. 120
  527. 00:10:56,260 --> 00:10:59,430
  528. You know, this is causing me
  529. serious psychological harm.
  530.  
  531. 121
  532. 00:10:59,590 --> 00:11:01,350
  533. [IMITATING SCOTT]
  534. l don't know. Who am l?
  535.  
  536. 122
  537. 00:11:01,510 --> 00:11:03,640
  538. Fine. You know what?
  539. l would love some chocolate.
  540.  
  541. 123
  542. 00:11:03,810 --> 00:11:04,970
  543. Here you go.
  544.  
  545. 124
  546. 00:11:05,140 --> 00:11:06,810
  547. Thank you. Perfect.
  548.  
  549. 125
  550. 00:11:07,770 --> 00:11:10,150
  551. [GROWLING]
  552.  
  553. 126
  554. 00:11:12,730 --> 00:11:14,610
  555. Heel, Mini Me.
  556.  
  557. 127
  558. 00:11:14,780 --> 00:11:16,360
  559. Heel.
  560.  
  561. 128
  562. 00:11:16,530 --> 00:11:19,280
  563. Come on. Got me a marlin. Yeah.
  564.  
  565. 129
  566. 00:11:22,160 --> 00:11:23,370
  567. -You okay, Mini Me?
  568. -Mm-hm.
  569.  
  570. 130
  571. 00:11:23,540 --> 00:11:26,120
  572. Yeah? Did l pull too hard?
  573. l don't want to hurt you.
  574.  
  575. 131
  576. 00:11:26,290 --> 00:11:28,120
  577. -Dr. Evil.
  578. -Yeah?
  579.  
  580. 132
  581. 00:11:28,290 --> 00:11:31,040
  582. What does Goldmember's plan
  583. have to do with us?
  584.  
  585. 133
  586. 00:11:31,210 --> 00:11:34,800
  587. Our early attempts at a tractor beam
  588. went through several preparations.
  589.  
  590. 134
  591. 00:11:34,960 --> 00:11:39,050
  592. Preparations A through G were a failure.
  593. But now, ladies and gentlemen...
  594.  
  595. 135
  596. 00:11:39,220 --> 00:11:43,760
  597. ...we finally have a working tractor beam
  598. which we shall call:
  599.  
  600. 136
  601. 00:11:43,970 --> 00:11:46,560
  602. "Preparation H."
  603.  
  604. 137
  605. 00:11:46,730 --> 00:11:48,100
  606. [CHUCKLES]
  607.  
  608. 138
  609. 00:11:48,270 --> 00:11:49,520
  610. What?
  611.  
  612. 139
  613. 00:11:49,690 --> 00:11:52,730
  614. Why don't you just call it
  615. "Operation Ass Cream," you ass.
  616.  
  617. 140
  618. 00:11:53,570 --> 00:11:55,520
  619. I’m sorry, did you want some ice cream?
  620.  
  621. 141
  622. 00:11:55,690 --> 00:11:58,900
  623. Yes. I'd love some chocolate ass cream.
  624.  
  625. 142
  626. 00:12:00,200 --> 00:12:01,360
  627. Perhaps later.
  628.  
  629. 143
  630. 00:12:01,530 --> 00:12:05,030
  631. -Dr. Evil, l love your plan.
  632. -Yeah, eh?
  633.  
  634. 144
  635. 00:12:05,200 --> 00:12:08,040
  636. Ja, Herr Doctor, it's a really good plan.
  637.  
  638. 145
  639. 00:12:08,200 --> 00:12:11,500
  640. Yes, Frau, on the whole,
  641. l think Preparation H feels good.
  642.  
  643. 146
  644. 00:12:11,670 --> 00:12:13,500
  645. [SCOTT LAUGHS]
  646.  
  647. 147
  648. 00:12:13,670 --> 00:12:16,630
  649. -What is it now?
  650. -No, nothing. You know what, I agree.
  651.  
  652. 148
  653. 00:12:16,800 --> 00:12:21,010
  654. Preparation H does feel good on the hole.
  655.  
  656. 149
  657. 00:12:21,180 --> 00:12:24,800
  658. Well, I’m glad we're sprechen Sie
  659. the same lingitty, ja.
  660.  
  661. 150
  662. 00:12:24,970 --> 00:12:26,220
  663. Ladies and gentlemen...
  664.  
  665. 151
  666. 00:12:27,390 --> 00:12:30,770
  667. ...using my time machine,
  668. l shall travel back to 1975...
  669.  
  670. 152
  671. 00:12:30,940 --> 00:12:33,850
  672. ...pick up Goldmember
  673. and bring him back to the future.
  674.  
  675. 153
  676. 00:12:34,020 --> 00:12:37,110
  677. And the best part of this plan is...
  678.  
  679. 154
  680. 00:12:37,320 --> 00:12:39,440
  681. ...no one can stop me.
  682.  
  683. 155
  684. 00:12:39,610 --> 00:12:41,450
  685. Not even...
  686.  
  687. 156
  688. 00:12:41,610 --> 00:12:43,990
  689. ...Austin Powers.
  690.  
  691. 157
  692. 00:12:44,780 --> 00:12:46,780
  693. [LAUGHS MANIACALLY]
  694.  
  695. 158
  696. 00:12:47,870 --> 00:12:51,790
  697. [ALL LAUGHING]
  698.  
  699. 159
  700. 00:12:55,130 --> 00:12:57,130
  701. Not so fast.
  702.  
  703. 160
  704. 00:12:57,300 --> 00:12:59,210
  705. You're surrounded, Dr. Evil.
  706.  
  707. 161
  708. 00:12:59,380 --> 00:13:00,800
  709. [GUNS COCKING]
  710.  
  711. 162
  712. 00:13:00,970 --> 00:13:02,550
  713. Shit.
  714.  
  715. 163
  716. 00:13:03,840 --> 00:13:08,810
  717. Dr. Evil, the World Court
  718. sentences you to 400 years.
  719.  
  720. 164
  721. 00:13:08,970 --> 00:13:10,470
  722. Do you have anything to say?
  723.  
  724. 165
  725. 00:13:10,640 --> 00:13:14,190
  726. No, but l think Mini Me does.
  727.  
  728. 166
  729. 00:13:16,730 --> 00:13:17,770
  730. [GASPING]
  731.  
  732. 167
  733. 00:13:17,940 --> 00:13:19,610
  734. JUDGE:
  735. Order! l will have order!
  736.  
  737. 168
  738. 00:13:20,190 --> 00:13:22,570
  739. Looks like two eggs in a hanky.
  740.  
  741. 169
  742. 00:13:25,410 --> 00:13:28,530
  743. The criminal genius known as Dr. Evil
  744. and his clone...
  745.  
  746. 170
  747. 00:13:28,740 --> 00:13:31,040
  748. ...were sentenced today
  749. at the World Organization.
  750.  
  751. 171
  752. 00:13:31,200 --> 00:13:33,330
  753. For his efforts, Austin Powers...
  754.  
  755. 172
  756. 00:13:33,500 --> 00:13:35,540
  757. ...son of England's most famous spy,
  758. Nigel Powers...
  759.  
  760. 173
  761. 00:13:35,710 --> 00:13:39,170
  762. ...will be knighted by the queen
  763. at Buckingham Palace.
  764.  
  765. 174
  766. 00:13:41,880 --> 00:13:44,340
  767. Arise, Sir Austin Powers.
  768.  
  769. 175
  770. 00:13:45,640 --> 00:13:46,970
  771. Thank you, Your Majesty.
  772.  
  773. 176
  774. 00:13:47,140 --> 00:13:51,350
  775. -Your father must be very proud of you.
  776. -Oh, yeah.
  777.  
  778. 177
  779. 00:13:51,520 --> 00:13:54,850
  780. Come on, Dad, stand up and take a bow.
  781.  
  782. 178
  783. 00:13:58,520 --> 00:13:59,860
  784. [GUESTS LAUGH]
  785.  
  786. 179
  787. 00:14:00,020 --> 00:14:01,480
  788. [WHISPERS]
  789. Daddy?
  790.  
  791. 180
  792. 00:14:03,400 --> 00:14:04,740
  793. Dad?
  794.  
  795. 181
  796. 00:14:21,840 --> 00:14:23,510
  797. [SINGING]
  798. Daddy
  799.  
  800. 182
  801. 00:14:25,550 --> 00:14:28,220
  802. Daddy wasn't there
  803.  
  804. 183
  805. 00:14:31,560 --> 00:14:33,220
  806. Daddy
  807.  
  808. 184
  809. 00:14:35,140 --> 00:14:37,440
  810. Daddy wasn't there
  811.  
  812. 185
  813. 00:14:37,600 --> 00:14:39,900
  814. To take me to the fair
  815.  
  816. 186
  817. 00:14:40,060 --> 00:14:44,860
  818. It seems he doesn't care
  819.  
  820. 187
  821. 00:14:45,030 --> 00:14:46,740
  822. Daddy wasn't there
  823.  
  824. 188
  825. 00:14:50,830 --> 00:14:53,200
  826. When I was first baptized
  827. When I was criticized
  828.  
  829. 189
  830. 00:14:53,370 --> 00:14:55,540
  831. When I was ostracized
  832. When I was Jazzercised
  833.  
  834. 190
  835. 00:14:55,710 --> 00:14:58,040
  836. Steak and kidney pies
  837. One-hour Martinize
  838.  
  839. 191
  840. 00:14:58,210 --> 00:15:00,880
  841. When I was circumcised
  842.  
  843. 192
  844. 00:15:01,040 --> 00:15:03,250
  845. Daddy wasn't there
  846.  
  847. 193
  848. 00:15:03,420 --> 00:15:05,380
  849. To take me to the fair
  850.  
  851. 194
  852. 00:15:05,800 --> 00:15:07,880
  853. To change my underwear
  854.  
  855. 195
  856. 00:15:08,470 --> 00:15:10,220
  857. Daddy wasn't there
  858.  
  859. 196
  860. 00:15:10,800 --> 00:15:12,180
  861. "Daddy Wasn't There." Peace.
  862.  
  863. 197
  864. 00:15:12,350 --> 00:15:14,350
  865. [CHEERING]
  866.  
  867. 198
  868. 00:15:15,100 --> 00:15:16,600
  869. l am a sexy beast.
  870.  
  871. 199
  872. 00:15:16,770 --> 00:15:17,770
  873. [LAUGHING]
  874. Yes.
  875.  
  876. 200
  877. 00:15:20,560 --> 00:15:22,230
  878. Bangs. Yes, how’s it going?
  879.  
  880. 201
  881. 00:15:22,400 --> 00:15:24,110
  882. The robot. Haven't seen that in a while.
  883.  
  884. 202
  885. 00:15:25,780 --> 00:15:29,400
  886. -It’s Austin Powers! You so funny.
  887. AUSTIN: Well, you know.
  888.  
  889. 203
  890. 00:15:29,610 --> 00:15:32,990
  891. Also, very sexiful. Can l have autograph?
  892.  
  893. 204
  894. 00:15:33,200 --> 00:15:35,580
  895. Of course. Your name is...?
  896.  
  897. 205
  898. 00:15:35,750 --> 00:15:37,290
  899. Fook Mi.
  900.  
  901. 206
  902. 00:15:38,120 --> 00:15:41,380
  903. Oh, behave, baby. Yes.
  904.  
  905. 207
  906. 00:15:41,540 --> 00:15:43,960
  907. -Now, your name is...?
  908. -Fook Mi.
  909.  
  910. 208
  911. 00:15:44,130 --> 00:15:45,800
  912. You kiss your mother with that mouth?
  913.  
  914. 209
  915. 00:15:46,630 --> 00:15:50,220
  916. Fook Mi. Like this.
  917.  
  918. 210
  919. 00:15:50,390 --> 00:15:52,180
  920. Oh, l see!
  921.  
  922. 211
  923. 00:15:52,350 --> 00:15:54,640
  924. Your name is Fook Mi.
  925.  
  926. 212
  927. 00:15:55,180 --> 00:15:56,970
  928. -You want drink?
  929. -Yes, of course.
  930.  
  931. 213
  932. 00:15:57,140 --> 00:16:00,850
  933. You know, l have a private bar in the back
  934. that you're more than welcome to use--
  935.  
  936. 214
  937. 00:16:01,020 --> 00:16:02,730
  938. Here you go.
  939.  
  940. 215
  941. 00:16:02,900 --> 00:16:05,110
  942. Fook Mi, that was fast.
  943.  
  944. 216
  945. 00:16:05,280 --> 00:16:06,320
  946. Fook Yu.
  947.  
  948. 217
  949. 00:16:06,480 --> 00:16:08,650
  950. You're going the right way
  951. for a smacked bottom...
  952.  
  953. 218
  954. 00:16:08,820 --> 00:16:11,110
  955. ...and l don't care who knows it.
  956.  
  957. 219
  958. 00:16:11,820 --> 00:16:12,860
  959. Austin.
  960.  
  961. 220
  962. 00:16:13,030 --> 00:16:14,660
  963. [STAMMERS]
  964.  
  965. 221
  966. 00:16:14,830 --> 00:16:18,120
  967. This is my twin sister. Her name Fook Yu.
  968.  
  969. 222
  970. 00:16:18,370 --> 00:16:19,790
  971. Fook Yu.
  972.  
  973. 223
  974. 00:16:19,960 --> 00:16:21,460
  975. Fook Mi.
  976.  
  977. 224
  978. 00:16:21,620 --> 00:16:22,670
  979. See?
  980.  
  981. 225
  982. 00:16:22,830 --> 00:16:24,500
  983. Twins. Twins.
  984.  
  985. 226
  986. 00:16:24,670 --> 00:16:25,670
  987. [SISTERS GIGGLING]
  988.  
  989. 227
  990. 00:16:25,840 --> 00:16:27,840
  991. [IMITATES SPRAY BOTTLE
  992. AND SQUEEGEE]
  993.  
  994. 228
  995. 00:16:29,590 --> 00:16:30,880
  996. Twins. Yes.
  997.  
  998. 229
  999. 00:16:31,090 --> 00:16:33,680
  1000. We're going to see the twins. Yes.
  1001.  
  1002. 230
  1003. 00:16:36,060 --> 00:16:39,980
  1004. l also think Austin Powers very sexiful.
  1005.  
  1006. 231
  1007. 00:16:40,140 --> 00:16:42,520
  1008. We think you are very gravy, baby.
  1009.  
  1010. 232
  1011. 00:16:42,690 --> 00:16:44,560
  1012. Do we make you sleepy?
  1013.  
  1014. 233
  1015. 00:16:44,770 --> 00:16:47,520
  1016. Well, you make me many things,
  1017. but sleepy's not one of them.
  1018.  
  1019. 234
  1020. 00:16:47,690 --> 00:16:48,730
  1021. [CHUCKLES]
  1022.  
  1023. 235
  1024. 00:16:48,900 --> 00:16:50,900
  1025. We give you top-secret massage.
  1026.  
  1027. 236
  1028. 00:16:51,070 --> 00:16:55,410
  1029. Yes, top-secret massage, baby.
  1030.  
  1031. 237
  1032. 00:16:58,450 --> 00:16:59,750
  1033. Sorry about that.
  1034.  
  1035. 238
  1036. 00:16:59,910 --> 00:17:02,500
  1037. l swear to God that never happens,
  1038. heh-heh-heh.
  1039.  
  1040. 239
  1041. 00:17:02,710 --> 00:17:04,540
  1042. Yes, hold on a tic.
  1043.  
  1044. 240
  1045. 00:17:04,710 --> 00:17:06,340
  1046. Okay....
  1047.  
  1048. 241
  1049. 00:17:10,210 --> 00:17:13,550
  1050. Okay. Now, where were we, babies? Yes.
  1051.  
  1052. 242
  1053. 00:17:13,720 --> 00:17:15,390
  1054. [PURRING]
  1055.  
  1056. 243
  1057. 00:17:15,550 --> 00:17:17,220
  1058. [ELEVATOR DINGS]
  1059.  
  1060. 244
  1061. 00:17:17,680 --> 00:17:20,100
  1062. Ah, Austin. I’m sorry to interrupt.
  1063.  
  1064. 245
  1065. 00:17:20,270 --> 00:17:22,390
  1066. Twins, Basil. Twins.
  1067.  
  1068. 246
  1069. 00:17:22,560 --> 00:17:25,020
  1070. Austin, it's your father.
  1071.  
  1072. 247
  1073. 00:17:25,190 --> 00:17:26,230
  1074. -Bye-bye.
  1075. -What?
  1076.  
  1077. 248
  1078. 00:17:26,400 --> 00:17:28,070
  1079. -Bye.
  1080. -He's been kidnapped.
  1081.  
  1082. 249
  1083. 00:17:30,150 --> 00:17:32,400
  1084. Very heavy, man.
  1085.  
  1086. 250
  1087. 00:17:32,570 --> 00:17:36,700
  1088. Oh. So that's why my father
  1089. wasn't at the knighting ceremony.
  1090.  
  1091. 251
  1092. 00:17:36,870 --> 00:17:38,280
  1093. Well, no, actually.
  1094.  
  1095. 252
  1096. 00:17:38,450 --> 00:17:41,240
  1097. He was kidnapped
  1098. after you were knighted.
  1099.  
  1100. 253
  1101. 00:17:41,410 --> 00:17:42,620
  1102. Ah.
  1103.  
  1104. 254
  1105. 00:17:42,790 --> 00:17:44,750
  1106. He was last seen on his yacht.
  1107.  
  1108. 255
  1109. 00:17:44,920 --> 00:17:47,420
  1110. Ah, yes, the HMS Shag-at-Sea.
  1111.  
  1112. 256
  1113. 00:17:47,590 --> 00:17:49,670
  1114. Exactly. Just take a look.
  1115.  
  1116. 257
  1117. 00:17:49,840 --> 00:17:51,000
  1118. Gentlemen, fall in.
  1119.  
  1120. 258
  1121. 00:17:51,960 --> 00:17:55,010
  1122. Austin, these men were assigned
  1123. to guard your father.
  1124.  
  1125. 259
  1126. 00:17:55,180 --> 00:17:57,550
  1127. Okay, chaps. Chins up, trousers down.
  1128.  
  1129. 260
  1130. 00:17:57,720 --> 00:18:00,510
  1131. l think we may have found a clue.
  1132.  
  1133. 261
  1134. 00:18:01,970 --> 00:18:06,060
  1135. Cor blimey. All your privates
  1136. have had their privates painted gold.
  1137.  
  1138. 262
  1139. 00:18:06,230 --> 00:18:07,690
  1140. How bizarre.
  1141.  
  1142. 263
  1143. 00:18:07,860 --> 00:18:09,860
  1144. Imagine, gilded tallywhackers...
  1145.  
  1146. 264
  1147. 00:18:10,020 --> 00:18:13,150
  1148. ...golden wedding tackle,
  1149. 14-karat trouser snakes--
  1150.  
  1151. 265
  1152. 00:18:13,320 --> 00:18:15,110
  1153. -That's enough.
  1154. -Okay.
  1155.  
  1156. 266
  1157. 00:18:15,280 --> 00:18:17,910
  1158. Basil, there's only one person
  1159. in the world...
  1160.  
  1161. 267
  1162. 00:18:18,070 --> 00:18:22,160
  1163. ...who truly understands
  1164. the psychology of a madman.
  1165.  
  1166. 268
  1167. 00:18:22,450 --> 00:18:25,120
  1168. IN UNISON:
  1169. Dr. Evil.
  1170.  
  1171. 269
  1172. 00:18:43,020 --> 00:18:44,350
  1173. [BEEPING]
  1174.  
  1175. 270
  1176. 00:18:46,640 --> 00:18:49,900
  1177. I've been expecting you, Mr. Powers.
  1178.  
  1179. 271
  1180. 00:18:50,060 --> 00:18:51,820
  1181. My father is missing.
  1182.  
  1183. 272
  1184. 00:18:51,980 --> 00:18:54,650
  1185. Yes, I heard. How ironic.
  1186.  
  1187. 273
  1188. 00:18:54,820 --> 00:18:58,740
  1189. You finally caught me,
  1190. yet now you need me more than ever.
  1191.  
  1192. 274
  1193. 00:18:58,910 --> 00:19:02,580
  1194. But then again, you've always needed me,
  1195. haven't you, Mr. Powers?
  1196.  
  1197. 275
  1198. 00:19:02,740 --> 00:19:06,410
  1199. Remember when I told you
  1200. we're not so different, you and I?
  1201.  
  1202. 276
  1203. 00:19:07,250 --> 00:19:09,920
  1204. We're not so different, you and l.
  1205.  
  1206. 277
  1207. 00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:12,750
  1208. See? l did say that. Mm-hm.
  1209.  
  1210. 278
  1211. 00:19:12,920 --> 00:19:15,760
  1212. Very clever. Now, who has my father?
  1213.  
  1214. 279
  1215. 00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:17,170
  1216. Uh-oh!
  1217.  
  1218. 280
  1219. 00:19:17,340 --> 00:19:19,800
  1220. Someone has some daddy issues.
  1221.  
  1222. 281
  1223. 00:19:19,970 --> 00:19:21,930
  1224. Nothing could be my father from the truth.
  1225.  
  1226. 282
  1227. 00:19:22,100 --> 00:19:24,350
  1228. Ooh! You said, "my father."
  1229.  
  1230. 283
  1231. 00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:26,680
  1232. -No, l dadn't.
  1233. -Hey-oh!
  1234.  
  1235. 284
  1236. 00:19:26,850 --> 00:19:28,100
  1237. Didn't. Did not.
  1238.  
  1239. 285
  1240. 00:19:28,270 --> 00:19:29,350
  1241. She-ba.
  1242.  
  1243. 286
  1244. 00:19:29,520 --> 00:19:31,940
  1245. -For me, this is a dad issue.
  1246. -Ha--
  1247.  
  1248. 287
  1249. 00:19:32,110 --> 00:19:33,190
  1250. Dead issue. Dead dad.
  1251.  
  1252. 288
  1253. 00:19:33,360 --> 00:19:36,110
  1254. Deadbeat dad. Daddy didn't love me.
  1255.  
  1256. 289
  1257. 00:19:36,860 --> 00:19:41,410
  1258. It seems the knighting ceremony
  1259. wasn't the only time...
  1260.  
  1261. 290
  1262. 00:19:41,950 --> 00:19:44,700
  1263. ...your daddy let you down.
  1264.  
  1265. 291
  1266. 00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:50,080
  1267. Remember that day at the academy?
  1268.  
  1269. 292
  1270. 00:19:50,250 --> 00:19:51,920
  1271. Think.
  1272.  
  1273. 293
  1274. 00:19:53,130 --> 00:19:55,460
  1275. It was graduation.
  1276.  
  1277. 294
  1278. 00:19:55,920 --> 00:19:57,920
  1279. [PLAYING REVEILLE]
  1280.  
  1281. 295
  1282. 00:20:01,470 --> 00:20:04,760
  1283. AUSTIN: Yeah, baby, yeah.
  1284. Do l make you horny, baby?
  1285.  
  1286. 296
  1287. 00:20:04,970 --> 00:20:06,560
  1288. Oh, yes, that's the spot. Right there.
  1289.  
  1290. 297
  1291. 00:20:06,720 --> 00:20:09,100
  1292. You're a naughty one. Yes, you are.
  1293.  
  1294. 298
  1295. 00:20:09,270 --> 00:20:11,350
  1296. Hello, vicar. Crake!
  1297.  
  1298. 299
  1299. 00:20:12,270 --> 00:20:14,520
  1300. Have you ever heard of knocking, man?
  1301.  
  1302. 300
  1303. 00:20:14,690 --> 00:20:16,480
  1304. Right.
  1305.  
  1306. 301
  1307. 00:20:16,650 --> 00:20:18,240
  1308. We were just getting started.
  1309.  
  1310. 302
  1311. 00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:20,110
  1312. Bye, love.
  1313.  
  1314. 303
  1315. 00:20:20,280 --> 00:20:24,160
  1316. Don't forget, Master Powers,
  1317. later you have a brief oral exam.
  1318.  
  1319. 304
  1320. 00:20:24,330 --> 00:20:27,450
  1321. Well, l hope it's mostly oral and not too...
  1322.  
  1323. 305
  1324. 00:20:28,080 --> 00:20:30,790
  1325. ...brief, baby.
  1326.  
  1327. 306
  1328. 00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:34,420
  1329. You know, "brief" and "oral exam"....
  1330.  
  1331. 307
  1332. 00:20:36,630 --> 00:20:38,670
  1333. Marks are in, lads.
  1334.  
  1335. 308
  1336. 00:20:41,010 --> 00:20:43,340
  1337. It looks Like Master Evil
  1338. is the top contender...
  1339.  
  1340. 309
  1341. 00:20:43,510 --> 00:20:46,100
  1342. ...for this year's
  1343. International Man of Mystery.
  1344.  
  1345. 310
  1346. 00:20:46,260 --> 00:20:47,680
  1347. He's number one in the class.
  1348.  
  1349. 311
  1350. 00:20:47,850 --> 00:20:49,770
  1351. Whoop-de-do, Basil.
  1352.  
  1353. 312
  1354. 00:20:49,930 --> 00:20:52,850
  1355. Hey, everybody, I'm number one.
  1356.  
  1357. 313
  1358. 00:20:53,020 --> 00:20:54,190
  1359. Who cares?
  1360.  
  1361. 314
  1362. 00:20:54,400 --> 00:20:56,690
  1363. Hello, I’m Number Two.
  1364.  
  1365. 315
  1366. 00:20:56,860 --> 00:20:58,610
  1367. Nice to meet you, Number Two...
  1368.  
  1369. 316
  1370. 00:20:58,780 --> 00:21:03,110
  1371. ...but now I’m going to be named
  1372. this year's International Man of Mystery.
  1373.  
  1374. 317
  1375. 00:21:03,280 --> 00:21:04,610
  1376. Yeah, right.
  1377.  
  1378. 318
  1379. 00:21:04,780 --> 00:21:06,780
  1380. [LAUGHING MANIACALLY]
  1381.  
  1382. 319
  1383. 00:21:11,580 --> 00:21:13,000
  1384. BOY:
  1385. Shut your gob.
  1386.  
  1387. 320
  1388. 00:21:13,250 --> 00:21:14,370
  1389. Ow!
  1390.  
  1391. 321
  1392. 00:21:15,920 --> 00:21:18,300
  1393. Who throws a cupcake? Honestly.
  1394.  
  1395. 322
  1396. 00:21:21,590 --> 00:21:24,970
  1397. DEAN: And now it's time to award
  1398. our greatest honor.
  1399.  
  1400. 323
  1401. 00:21:25,850 --> 00:21:29,060
  1402. This year's International
  1403. Man of Mystery is...
  1404.  
  1405. 324
  1406. 00:21:29,680 --> 00:21:31,770
  1407. ...Austin Powers.
  1408.  
  1409. 325
  1410. 00:21:32,270 --> 00:21:34,560
  1411. Well done, Austin.
  1412.  
  1413. 326
  1414. 00:21:40,320 --> 00:21:41,860
  1415. DEAN: Jolly good.
  1416. MAN 1: Top notch.
  1417.  
  1418. 327
  1419. 00:21:42,030 --> 00:21:44,740
  1420. MAN 2: We're proud of you.
  1421. WOMAN: Very well done, indeed.
  1422.  
  1423. 328
  1424. 00:21:46,870 --> 00:21:50,990
  1425. It’s always been my dream
  1426. to win this award, just like my dad.
  1427.  
  1428. 329
  1429. 00:21:51,540 --> 00:21:53,160
  1430. And I’m glad he could be here.
  1431.  
  1432. 330
  1433. 00:21:53,330 --> 00:21:55,620
  1434. Stand up, Dad. Take a bow.
  1435.  
  1436. 331
  1437. 00:21:56,500 --> 00:21:58,500
  1438. [CROWD MURMURING]
  1439.  
  1440. 332
  1441. 00:22:02,170 --> 00:22:03,340
  1442. Dad?
  1443.  
  1444. 333
  1445. 00:22:06,180 --> 00:22:07,510
  1446. Daddy?
  1447.  
  1448. 334
  1449. 00:22:11,350 --> 00:22:13,350
  1450. [WATER TRICKLING]
  1451.  
  1452. 335
  1453. 00:22:16,310 --> 00:22:17,350
  1454. [TOILET FLUSHES]
  1455.  
  1456. 336
  1457. 00:22:17,520 --> 00:22:19,230
  1458. Boo-frickity-hoo.
  1459.  
  1460. 337
  1461. 00:22:19,400 --> 00:22:23,030
  1462. l had the best grades in the class
  1463. and I didn't get diddlysquat.
  1464.  
  1465. 338
  1466. 00:22:23,190 --> 00:22:25,610
  1467. -Here we go.
  1468. -Tell me, Mr. Powers...
  1469.  
  1470. 339
  1471. 00:22:25,780 --> 00:22:27,530
  1472. ...what did you find on those sailors?
  1473.  
  1474. 340
  1475. 00:22:27,700 --> 00:22:32,200
  1476. A golden surprise, perhaps?
  1477.  
  1478. 341
  1479. 00:22:32,790 --> 00:22:35,370
  1480. How did--? Yes.
  1481.  
  1482. 342
  1483. 00:22:35,540 --> 00:22:39,540
  1484. All the sailors had their
  1485. meat and two veg painted gold.
  1486.  
  1487. 343
  1488. 00:22:39,710 --> 00:22:43,130
  1489. Yes, it's the distinctive calling card
  1490. of a criminal mastermind.
  1491.  
  1492. 344
  1493. 00:22:43,300 --> 00:22:45,420
  1494. The aptly named...
  1495.  
  1496. 345
  1497. 00:22:46,760 --> 00:22:48,970
  1498. ...Goldmember.
  1499.  
  1500. 346
  1501. 00:22:50,720 --> 00:22:53,140
  1502. How can I find this Goldmember?
  1503.  
  1504. 347
  1505. 00:22:54,730 --> 00:22:56,730
  1506. Quid pro quo, Mr. Powers.
  1507.  
  1508. 348
  1509. 00:22:57,480 --> 00:23:00,400
  1510. Yes, squid pro row.
  1511.  
  1512. 349
  1513. 00:23:01,020 --> 00:23:05,900
  1514. I'll give you Goldmember, you give me
  1515. a transfer to a regular prison...
  1516.  
  1517. 350
  1518. 00:23:06,070 --> 00:23:09,660
  1519. ...so that l could be with
  1520. my beloved Mini Me.
  1521.  
  1522. 351
  1523. 00:23:09,870 --> 00:23:13,120
  1524. Okay, I'll get you a transfer
  1525. to a regular prison.
  1526.  
  1527. 352
  1528. 00:23:13,290 --> 00:23:14,660
  1529. Now, where's Goldmember?
  1530.  
  1531. 353
  1532. 00:23:14,830 --> 00:23:17,080
  1533. Not where, Mr. Powers...
  1534.  
  1535. 354
  1536. 00:23:17,250 --> 00:23:18,670
  1537. ...but when.
  1538.  
  1539. 355
  1540. 00:23:18,830 --> 00:23:23,590
  1541. 1975. Studio 69 Disco. New York City.
  1542. Corner of 69th and 8th.
  1543.  
  1544. 356
  1545. 00:23:24,460 --> 00:23:26,170
  1546. You go now, Mr. Powers.
  1547.  
  1548. 357
  1549. 00:23:26,380 --> 00:23:28,550
  1550. Fly, fly.
  1551.  
  1552. 358
  1553. 00:23:36,060 --> 00:23:37,810
  1554. I’ll get it.
  1555.  
  1556. 359
  1557. 00:23:44,730 --> 00:23:48,190
  1558. Instead of hiding your father
  1559. in some remote location...
  1560.  
  1561. 360
  1562. 00:23:48,400 --> 00:23:50,950
  1563. ...Goldmember is hiding him in 1975.
  1564.  
  1565. 361
  1566. 00:23:51,120 --> 00:23:54,410
  1567. So our engineers
  1568. have crafted this vehicle...
  1569.  
  1570. 362
  1571. 00:23:54,580 --> 00:23:56,750
  1572. ...to time-travel to the '70s.
  1573.  
  1574. 363
  1575. 00:23:56,910 --> 00:24:00,460
  1576. Smashing, Basil. A pimpmobile.
  1577.  
  1578. 364
  1579. 00:24:00,620 --> 00:24:03,630
  1580. Oh, yes, yes.
  1581. l knew it would tickle your fancy.
  1582.  
  1583. 365
  1584. 00:24:03,790 --> 00:24:05,920
  1585. What can l say? Look.
  1586.  
  1587. 366
  1588. 00:24:06,130 --> 00:24:07,130
  1589. Cough.
  1590.  
  1591. 367
  1592. 00:24:07,300 --> 00:24:08,550
  1593. [COUGHS THEN LAUGHS]
  1594.  
  1595. 368
  1596. 00:24:08,720 --> 00:24:11,720
  1597. Here we go, 1975.
  1598.  
  1599. 369
  1600. 00:24:11,890 --> 00:24:12,970
  1601. Good luck, Austin.
  1602.  
  1603. 370
  1604. 00:24:13,140 --> 00:24:14,970
  1605. 1975!
  1606.  
  1607. 371
  1608. 00:24:15,140 --> 00:24:17,470
  1609. Yeah, baby! Yeah!
  1610.  
  1611. 372
  1612. 00:24:20,560 --> 00:24:22,560
  1613. [STAMMERING]
  1614.  
  1615. 373
  1616. 00:24:58,680 --> 00:25:01,020
  1617. [SINGING]
  1618. Solid Gold
  1619.  
  1620. 374
  1621. 00:25:02,850 --> 00:25:05,150
  1622. Solid Gold
  1623.  
  1624. 375
  1625. 00:25:05,560 --> 00:25:08,690
  1626. It's gold, it's gold
  1627. It's gold, it's gold
  1628.  
  1629. 376
  1630. 00:25:08,860 --> 00:25:11,570
  1631. It's solid gold, baby
  1632.  
  1633. 377
  1634. 00:25:14,280 --> 00:25:17,330
  1635. It's gold, it's gold
  1636. It's gold, it's gold
  1637.  
  1638. 378
  1639. 00:25:17,490 --> 00:25:20,500
  1640. It's solid gold, baby
  1641.  
  1642. 379
  1643. 00:25:20,660 --> 00:25:22,290
  1644. Yeah
  1645.  
  1646. 380
  1647. 00:25:22,460 --> 00:25:24,540
  1648. He's got the Midas touch
  1649.  
  1650. 381
  1651. 00:25:24,710 --> 00:25:26,330
  1652. But he touched it too much
  1653.  
  1654. 382
  1655. 00:25:26,500 --> 00:25:30,880
  1656. Hey, Goldmember
  1657.  
  1658. 383
  1659. 00:25:31,050 --> 00:25:32,880
  1660. He's got a golden pad
  1661.  
  1662. 384
  1663. 00:25:33,300 --> 00:25:34,970
  1664. He's super bad
  1665.  
  1666. 385
  1667. 00:25:35,140 --> 00:25:39,560
  1668. Hey, Goldmember
  1669.  
  1670. 386
  1671. 00:25:39,720 --> 00:25:43,890
  1672. Good evening, everybody,
  1673. and welcome to Studio 69.
  1674.  
  1675. 387
  1676. 00:25:44,060 --> 00:25:45,900
  1677. Here he is, ladies and gentlemen.
  1678.  
  1679. 388
  1680. 00:25:46,060 --> 00:25:49,440
  1681. It’s Goldmember!
  1682.  
  1683. 389
  1684. 00:25:53,320 --> 00:25:54,360
  1685. [LAUGHS]
  1686.  
  1687. 390
  1688. 00:25:58,080 --> 00:26:00,950
  1689. Hey, everybody, I am from Holland.
  1690.  
  1691. 391
  1692. 00:26:01,120 --> 00:26:03,710
  1693. Isn't that weird? Yes. Ha, ha.
  1694.  
  1695. 392
  1696. 00:26:05,420 --> 00:26:07,330
  1697. FOXXY [SINGING]:
  1698. He's got the Midas touch
  1699.  
  1700. 393
  1701. 00:26:07,500 --> 00:26:09,380
  1702. But he touched it too much
  1703.  
  1704. 394
  1705. 00:26:09,550 --> 00:26:11,590
  1706. SINGERS: Hey, Goldmember
  1707. FOXXY: Yeah
  1708.  
  1709. 395
  1710. 00:26:11,760 --> 00:26:13,760
  1711. SINGERS:
  1712. Hey, Goldmember
  1713.  
  1714. 396
  1715. 00:26:13,920 --> 00:26:15,590
  1716. FOXXY:
  1717. You're getting' down tonight
  1718.  
  1719. 397
  1720. 00:26:15,760 --> 00:26:17,760
  1721. -Ow!
  1722. FOXXY: You're dynamite
  1723.  
  1724. 398
  1725. 00:26:17,930 --> 00:26:19,260
  1726. SINGERS:
  1727. Hey, Goldmember
  1728.  
  1729. 399
  1730. 00:26:19,430 --> 00:26:22,350
  1731. -Goldmember
  1732. -Hey, Goldmember
  1733.  
  1734. 400
  1735. 00:26:22,520 --> 00:26:24,600
  1736. FOXXY: 'Cause that's the way, uh-huh
  1737. SINGERS: Uh-huh
  1738.  
  1739. 401
  1740. 00:26:24,810 --> 00:26:26,770
  1741. FOXXY: He likes it, uh-huh
  1742. SINGERS: Uh-huh
  1743.  
  1744. 402
  1745. 00:26:26,940 --> 00:26:28,940
  1746. FOXXY: Goldmember
  1747. SINGERS: Goldmember
  1748.  
  1749. 403
  1750. 00:26:29,110 --> 00:26:31,190
  1751. FOXXY: He loves it
  1752. SINGERS: He loves it
  1753.  
  1754. 404
  1755. 00:26:31,360 --> 00:26:33,360
  1756. FOXXY: 'Cause that's the way, uh-huh
  1757. -Uh-huh
  1758.  
  1759. 405
  1760. 00:26:33,530 --> 00:26:35,280
  1761. -He likes it, uh-huh
  1762. -Uh-huh
  1763.  
  1764. 406
  1765. 00:26:35,450 --> 00:26:37,490
  1766. -Goldmember
  1767. SINGERS: Goldmember
  1768.  
  1769. 407
  1770. 00:26:37,660 --> 00:26:39,490
  1771. FOXXY: He loves it
  1772. SINGERS: He loves it
  1773.  
  1774. 408
  1775. 00:26:39,660 --> 00:26:41,700
  1776. FOXXY:
  1777. He's got the Midas touch
  1778.  
  1779. 409
  1780. 00:26:41,870 --> 00:26:43,950
  1781. He touched it too much
  1782.  
  1783. 410
  1784. 00:26:44,120 --> 00:26:45,790
  1785. FOXXY & SINGERS:
  1786. Hey, Goldmember
  1787.  
  1788. 411
  1789. 00:26:45,960 --> 00:26:47,960
  1790. SINGERS: Hey, Goldmember
  1791. -Goldmember
  1792.  
  1793. 412
  1794. 00:26:48,130 --> 00:26:50,790
  1795. He's from the Netherlands
  1796.  
  1797. 413
  1798. 00:26:50,960 --> 00:26:53,130
  1799. -It's where he learned to dance
  1800. -Hey, Goldmember
  1801.  
  1802. 414
  1803. 00:26:53,340 --> 00:26:55,170
  1804. -Gold, Goldmember
  1805. -Hey, Goldmember
  1806.  
  1807. 415
  1808. 00:26:55,340 --> 00:26:57,300
  1809. Hey, Goldmember
  1810.  
  1811. 416
  1812. 00:26:57,470 --> 00:27:00,180
  1813. It's gold, it's gold
  1814. It's gold, it's gold
  1815.  
  1816. 417
  1817. 00:27:00,390 --> 00:27:03,390
  1818. It's solid gold, baby
  1819.  
  1820. 418
  1821. 00:27:03,810 --> 00:27:06,810
  1822. -Goldmember's so solid
  1823. SINGERS: It's gold, it's gold, it's gold
  1824.  
  1825. 419
  1826. 00:27:06,980 --> 00:27:08,900
  1827. It's gold, it's gold, it's gold
  1828.  
  1829. 420
  1830. 00:27:09,060 --> 00:27:12,320
  1831. -It's gold
  1832. -It's solid gold, baby
  1833.  
  1834. 421
  1835. 00:27:12,480 --> 00:27:14,820
  1836. His member's so gold
  1837.  
  1838. 422
  1839. 00:27:14,990 --> 00:27:17,490
  1840. Yes, it is, yeah
  1841.  
  1842. 423
  1843. 00:27:25,000 --> 00:27:27,790
  1844. FOXXY:
  1845. Well, if it isn't Austin Powers.
  1846.  
  1847. 424
  1848. 00:27:27,960 --> 00:27:29,000
  1849. I’m sorry?
  1850.  
  1851. 425
  1852. 00:27:29,170 --> 00:27:32,420
  1853. FOXXY: You got a lot of nerve
  1854. dragging your jive white ass in here.
  1855.  
  1856. 426
  1857. 00:27:32,590 --> 00:27:35,000
  1858. l don't believe we've met.
  1859.  
  1860. 427
  1861. 00:27:35,670 --> 00:27:37,630
  1862. It’s me. Foxxy!
  1863.  
  1864. 428
  1865. 00:27:37,800 --> 00:27:39,130
  1866. Foxxy Cleopatra!
  1867.  
  1868. 429
  1869. 00:27:39,550 --> 00:27:41,180
  1870. Long time, no see.
  1871.  
  1872. 430
  1873. 00:27:41,350 --> 00:27:43,680
  1874. -Oh.
  1875. -Stop!
  1876.  
  1877. 431
  1878. 00:27:43,850 --> 00:27:46,020
  1879. We can't be seen talking to each other,
  1880. you dig?
  1881.  
  1882. 432
  1883. 00:27:46,180 --> 00:27:48,600
  1884. I’m using this cat as a distraction.
  1885.  
  1886. 433
  1887. 00:27:48,770 --> 00:27:50,350
  1888. l get it. Yes, very clever.
  1889.  
  1890. 434
  1891. 00:27:51,230 --> 00:27:52,690
  1892. First things first.
  1893.  
  1894. 435
  1895. 00:27:52,860 --> 00:27:55,690
  1896. Ow! Ouch-kabibble!
  1897.  
  1898. 436
  1899. 00:27:55,860 --> 00:27:59,700
  1900. Eight years and no phone call?
  1901. Nobody stands up Foxxy Cleopatra!
  1902.  
  1903. 437
  1904. 00:27:59,860 --> 00:28:01,200
  1905. Where have you been?
  1906.  
  1907. 438
  1908. 00:28:01,370 --> 00:28:03,410
  1909. Listen, Foxxy.
  1910.  
  1911. 439
  1912. 00:28:03,580 --> 00:28:06,790
  1913. l just want you to know
  1914. l never intended to hurt you, baby.
  1915.  
  1916. 440
  1917. 00:28:07,410 --> 00:28:09,710
  1918. Well, all I know is...
  1919.  
  1920. 441
  1921. 00:28:09,870 --> 00:28:12,420
  1922. ...Mama only got a taste of honey...
  1923.  
  1924. 442
  1925. 00:28:12,580 --> 00:28:15,300
  1926. ...but she wanted the whole beehive.
  1927.  
  1928. 443
  1929. 00:28:16,880 --> 00:28:18,550
  1930. Oh, beehive.
  1931.  
  1932. 444
  1933. 00:28:18,720 --> 00:28:20,880
  1934. [LAUGHING]
  1935. Yes, "beehive."
  1936.  
  1937. 445
  1938. 00:28:21,050 --> 00:28:23,300
  1939. You always knew how to make me smile.
  1940.  
  1941. 446
  1942. 00:28:23,470 --> 00:28:26,390
  1943. Well, you know, it's a gift, really. l, um--
  1944.  
  1945. 447
  1946. 00:28:26,560 --> 00:28:27,890
  1947. Ugh, what am I doing?
  1948.  
  1949. 448
  1950. 00:28:28,060 --> 00:28:31,060
  1951. Foxxy, what are you doing
  1952. in Goldmember's club?
  1953.  
  1954. 449
  1955. 00:28:32,060 --> 00:28:33,230
  1956. FOXXY:
  1957. I’m undercover.
  1958.  
  1959. 450
  1960. 00:28:33,400 --> 00:28:37,070
  1961. About a year ago,
  1962. my partner at the bureau was killed.
  1963.  
  1964. 451
  1965. 00:28:37,280 --> 00:28:40,740
  1966. And that jive-ass turkey Goldmember
  1967. is the prime suspect.
  1968.  
  1969. 452
  1970. 00:28:40,900 --> 00:28:42,240
  1971. Ow!
  1972.  
  1973. 453
  1974. 00:28:43,070 --> 00:28:45,530
  1975. Your father's in the back room,
  1976. under heavy guard.
  1977.  
  1978. 454
  1979. 00:28:45,700 --> 00:28:48,540
  1980. -Thanks, Foxxy.
  1981. -Austin! Good luck.
  1982.  
  1983. 455
  1984. 00:28:50,080 --> 00:28:51,750
  1985. [AUSTIN GRUNTING]
  1986.  
  1987. 456
  1988. 00:28:54,130 --> 00:28:55,460
  1989. [MAN Panting]
  1990.  
  1991. 457
  1992. 00:29:05,050 --> 00:29:06,260
  1993. WOMAN:
  1994. Oh!
  1995.  
  1996. 458
  1997. 00:29:06,430 --> 00:29:08,260
  1998. -Dad!
  1999. -Hello, son.
  2000.  
  2001. 459
  2002. 00:29:08,430 --> 00:29:11,060
  2003. Just overpowering my guards. Heh, heh.
  2004.  
  2005. 460
  2006. 00:29:11,230 --> 00:29:13,600
  2007. I’m here to rescue you. Come quickly.
  2008.  
  2009. 461
  2010. 00:29:13,770 --> 00:29:16,480
  2011. I’ve got a better idea.
  2012. Why don't you rescue me in about...
  2013.  
  2014. 462
  2015. 00:29:16,650 --> 00:29:18,940
  2016. ...what, seven or eight minutes, eh?
  2017. Ha, ha.
  2018.  
  2019. 463
  2020. 00:29:19,110 --> 00:29:22,780
  2021. Oh, knock it off.
  2022. l don't want to see my dad on the job.
  2023.  
  2024. 464
  2025. 00:29:22,950 --> 00:29:23,950
  2026. Come on, let's go.
  2027.  
  2028. 465
  2029. 00:29:24,110 --> 00:29:26,780
  2030. -Okay. I’m sorry. I'm sorry, girls.
  2031. GIRLS: No.
  2032.  
  2033. 466
  2034. 00:29:26,950 --> 00:29:29,450
  2035. I’ve got to go, it's my boy. Hold on.
  2036.  
  2037. 467
  2038. 00:29:29,620 --> 00:29:31,450
  2039. [GROANS]
  2040.  
  2041. 468
  2042. 00:29:31,620 --> 00:29:34,000
  2043. -What's wrong with your neck?
  2044. -l took a Viagra.
  2045.  
  2046. 469
  2047. 00:29:34,170 --> 00:29:36,540
  2048. It got stuck in my throat.
  2049. I’ve had a stiff neck for hours.
  2050.  
  2051. 470
  2052. 00:29:36,710 --> 00:29:37,960
  2053. IN UNISON:
  2054. l thank you.
  2055.  
  2056. 471
  2057. 00:29:38,130 --> 00:29:39,340
  2058. [ALL LAUGH]
  2059.  
  2060. 472
  2061. 00:29:39,510 --> 00:29:42,010
  2062. Listen, Dad, if you are gonna
  2063. talk about naughty things...
  2064.  
  2065. 473
  2066. 00:29:42,170 --> 00:29:43,840
  2067. ...in front of these American girls...
  2068.  
  2069. 474
  2070. 00:29:44,010 --> 00:29:46,090
  2071. ...then at least speak "English" English.
  2072.  
  2073. 475
  2074. 00:29:47,050 --> 00:29:48,680
  2075. All right, my son.
  2076.  
  2077. 476
  2078. 00:29:48,850 --> 00:29:51,470
  2079. l could've had it away
  2080. with this cracking Judy, my old china.
  2081.  
  2082. 477
  2083. 00:29:51,640 --> 00:29:53,480
  2084. Are you telling pork pies
  2085. and a bag of tripe?
  2086.  
  2087. 478
  2088. 00:29:53,640 --> 00:29:56,310
  2089. Because if you are feeling quiggly,
  2090. why not just have a J. Arthur?
  2091.  
  2092. 479
  2093. 00:29:56,480 --> 00:29:58,560
  2094. -What, Billy No-Mates?
  2095. -Too right, youth.
  2096.  
  2097. 480
  2098. 00:29:58,730 --> 00:30:01,280
  2099. Don't you remember the din-din
  2100. with the grotty Scottish bint?
  2101.  
  2102. 481
  2103. 00:30:01,440 --> 00:30:03,440
  2104. Oh, the one that was all
  2105. sixes and sevens?
  2106.  
  2107. 482
  2108. 00:30:03,610 --> 00:30:07,070
  2109. The trouble and strife of the Morris dancer
  2110. that lived up the apples and pears.
  2111.  
  2112. 483
  2113. 00:30:07,240 --> 00:30:09,870
  2114. Yes, yes, she was the barrister
  2115. that became a bobby in a lorry...
  2116.  
  2117. 484
  2118. 00:30:10,040 --> 00:30:11,370
  2119. [MUMBLING INDISTINCTLY]
  2120.  
  2121. 485
  2122. 00:30:11,540 --> 00:30:13,910
  2123. ...with a Gatling gun
  2124. in and above St. Regis...
  2125.  
  2126. 486
  2127. 00:30:14,080 --> 00:30:15,210
  2128. [IN UNISON]
  2129. ...tea kettle.
  2130.  
  2131. 487
  2132. 00:30:15,370 --> 00:30:16,580
  2133. AUSTIN: Yes.
  2134. Nigel: Then she--
  2135.  
  2136. 488
  2137. 00:30:16,750 --> 00:30:19,000
  2138. BOTH:
  2139. Shat on a turtle.
  2140.  
  2141. 489
  2142. 00:30:19,170 --> 00:30:23,010
  2143. -Oh, God, we had some good times, eh?
  2144. -We had some good times, eh?
  2145.  
  2146. 490
  2147. 00:30:23,170 --> 00:30:25,630
  2148. -Wonderful times, we had.
  2149. -Good times, yeah.
  2150.  
  2151. 491
  2152. 00:30:25,800 --> 00:30:29,100
  2153. NIGEL:
  2154. We had some good, uh...
  2155.  
  2156. 492
  2157. 00:30:30,430 --> 00:30:31,470
  2158. NIGEL & AUSTIN:
  2159. ...times.
  2160.  
  2161. 493
  2162. 00:30:31,640 --> 00:30:33,850
  2163. Welcome to 1975...
  2164.  
  2165. 494
  2166. 00:30:34,020 --> 00:30:36,440
  2167. ...Austin Powers and father.
  2168.  
  2169. 495
  2170. 00:30:36,600 --> 00:30:40,360
  2171. Excuse me while l change.
  2172. The roller boogie has made me sweaty.
  2173.  
  2174. 496
  2175. 00:30:40,520 --> 00:30:42,020
  2176. Yeah, sweaty.
  2177.  
  2178. 497
  2179. 00:30:42,190 --> 00:30:43,820
  2180. You see, Mr. Powers...
  2181.  
  2182. 498
  2183. 00:30:47,200 --> 00:30:50,580
  2184. ...I love gold.
  2185.  
  2186. 499
  2187. 00:30:50,780 --> 00:30:52,700
  2188. The look of it, the taste of it...
  2189.  
  2190. 500
  2191. 00:30:52,870 --> 00:30:55,620
  2192. ...the smell of it, the texture.
  2193.  
  2194. 501
  2195. 00:30:55,790 --> 00:30:57,500
  2196. l love gold so much...
  2197.  
  2198. 502
  2199. 00:30:57,670 --> 00:31:01,960
  2200. ...that I even lost my genitalia
  2201. in an unfortunate smelting accident.
  2202.  
  2203. 503
  2204. 00:31:02,630 --> 00:31:04,550
  2205. Hence the name...
  2206.  
  2207. 504
  2208. 00:31:04,720 --> 00:31:06,630
  2209. ...Goldmember.
  2210.  
  2211. 505
  2212. 00:31:07,890 --> 00:31:09,220
  2213. [GOLDMEMBER STAMMERS]
  2214.  
  2215. 506
  2216. 00:31:14,600 --> 00:31:17,560
  2217. We are both swingers, you see? Ha, ha.
  2218.  
  2219. 507
  2220. 00:31:17,730 --> 00:31:20,230
  2221. You have a tight body. Yes.
  2222.  
  2223. 508
  2224. 00:31:20,400 --> 00:31:22,230
  2225. l see that from your tight pants.
  2226.  
  2227. 509
  2228. 00:31:22,860 --> 00:31:26,030
  2229. Yes, you are tight like a tiger.
  2230.  
  2231. 510
  2232. 00:31:26,200 --> 00:31:28,360
  2233. Would you like a smoke and a pancake?
  2234.  
  2235. 511
  2236. 00:31:28,530 --> 00:31:31,410
  2237. -A what?
  2238. -A smoke and a pancake.
  2239.  
  2240. 512
  2241. 00:31:31,580 --> 00:31:34,740
  2242. You know, flapjack and a cigarette?
  2243. Hmm?
  2244.  
  2245. 513
  2246. 00:31:34,910 --> 00:31:36,910
  2247. All right. Cigar and a waffle?
  2248.  
  2249. 514
  2250. 00:31:37,120 --> 00:31:39,250
  2251. No? Pipe and a crepe?
  2252.  
  2253. 515
  2254. 00:31:39,420 --> 00:31:42,080
  2255. -No? Bong and a blintz?
  2256. NIGEL & AUSTIN: No.
  2257.  
  2258. 516
  2259. 00:31:42,250 --> 00:31:45,210
  2260. Ah, well. Then there is no pleasing you.
  2261.  
  2262. 517
  2263. 00:31:45,380 --> 00:31:47,090
  2264. That's not right.
  2265.  
  2266. 518
  2267. 00:31:47,260 --> 00:31:50,130
  2268. Ooh, hello. What have we here?
  2269.  
  2270. 519
  2271. 00:31:50,340 --> 00:31:51,800
  2272. That's a keeper. Yes.
  2273.  
  2274. 520
  2275. 00:31:51,970 --> 00:31:54,600
  2276. Put it in the skin box, please.
  2277. With the others.
  2278.  
  2279. 521
  2280. 00:31:54,770 --> 00:31:58,100
  2281. -I’m peeling.
  2282. -Oh, that’s just disgusting.
  2283.  
  2284. 522
  2285. 00:31:58,270 --> 00:31:59,940
  2286. Quickly. Quickly. Thank you.
  2287.  
  2288. 523
  2289. 00:32:00,100 --> 00:32:01,270
  2290. Save me from myself.
  2291.  
  2292. 524
  2293. 00:32:01,440 --> 00:32:03,560
  2294. You're insane, Goldmember.
  2295.  
  2296. 525
  2297. 00:32:03,730 --> 00:32:05,110
  2298. [LAUGHS]
  2299.  
  2300. 526
  2301. 00:32:05,280 --> 00:32:07,780
  2302. And that's the way,
  2303. uh-huh, uh-huh, l like it.
  2304.  
  2305. 527
  2306. 00:32:07,950 --> 00:32:10,280
  2307. KC and the Sunshine Band.
  2308.  
  2309. 528
  2310. 00:32:10,450 --> 00:32:13,740
  2311. All right, Goldmember,
  2312. don't play the laughing boy.
  2313.  
  2314. 529
  2315. 00:32:13,910 --> 00:32:16,950
  2316. There are only two things
  2317. l can't stand in this world:
  2318.  
  2319. 530
  2320. 00:32:17,120 --> 00:32:21,330
  2321. People who are intolerant
  2322. of other people's cultures...
  2323.  
  2324. 531
  2325. 00:32:21,500 --> 00:32:23,630
  2326. -...and the Dutch.
  2327. GOLDMEMBER: What?
  2328.  
  2329. 532
  2330. 00:32:24,460 --> 00:32:25,880
  2331. [BEEPS]
  2332.  
  2333. 533
  2334. 00:32:27,300 --> 00:32:28,970
  2335. Take the father away.
  2336.  
  2337. 534
  2338. 00:32:31,050 --> 00:32:35,560
  2339. Dutch-hater. And now, ha, ha,
  2340. it is time to say goodbye.
  2341.  
  2342. 535
  2343. 00:32:35,720 --> 00:32:37,810
  2344. Dr. Evil's orders.
  2345.  
  2346. 536
  2347. 00:32:37,980 --> 00:32:41,310
  2348. Which for you is bad news, bears.
  2349.  
  2350. 537
  2351. 00:32:41,480 --> 00:32:42,560
  2352. Walter Matthau.
  2353.  
  2354. 538
  2355. 00:32:42,730 --> 00:32:43,980
  2356. Shazam.
  2357.  
  2358. 539
  2359. 00:32:44,820 --> 00:32:46,690
  2360. Up yours, jive turkey.
  2361.  
  2362. 540
  2363. 00:32:46,860 --> 00:32:48,650
  2364. -Traitor.
  2365. -Ugh!
  2366.  
  2367. 541
  2368. 00:32:48,820 --> 00:32:51,110
  2369. Heh-heh-heh. Yes, the gun.
  2370. Good, very good.
  2371.  
  2372. 542
  2373. 00:32:51,280 --> 00:32:52,820
  2374. 2002.
  2375.  
  2376. 543
  2377. 00:32:54,070 --> 00:32:56,490
  2378. They're taking my father
  2379. to the time machine.
  2380.  
  2381. 544
  2382. 00:32:56,660 --> 00:32:59,540
  2383. -The say-what machine?
  2384. GOLDMEMBER: Come on, now. Ha, ha.
  2385.  
  2386. 545
  2387. 00:32:59,710 --> 00:33:01,250
  2388. AUSTIN: No!
  2389. -This way, sugar.
  2390.  
  2391. 546
  2392. 00:33:11,720 --> 00:33:13,720
  2393. That was close, Foxxy. l owe you one.
  2394.  
  2395. 547
  2396. 00:33:13,890 --> 00:33:17,970
  2397. Austin, I found this in Goldmember's office.
  2398. It’s a microfilm. It may be a clue.
  2399.  
  2400. 548
  2401. 00:33:18,140 --> 00:33:20,810
  2402. -Smashing.
  2403. -l want to go to the future with you.
  2404.  
  2405. 549
  2406. 00:33:20,980 --> 00:33:24,020
  2407. We can catch Goldmember together.
  2408. l owe it to my partner.
  2409.  
  2410. 550
  2411. 00:33:24,190 --> 00:33:27,150
  2412. l should warn you, Foxxy,
  2413. 2002 is very different.
  2414.  
  2415. 551
  2416. 00:33:27,320 --> 00:33:30,190
  2417. Well, heh, the future
  2418. better get ready for me.
  2419.  
  2420. 552
  2421. 00:33:30,360 --> 00:33:34,610
  2422. Because I’m Foxxy Cleopatra
  2423. and I'm a whole lot of woman.
  2424.  
  2425. 553
  2426. 00:33:34,780 --> 00:33:37,030
  2427. [BOTH LAUGH]
  2428.  
  2429. 554
  2430. 00:33:37,200 --> 00:33:40,370
  2431. 2002, here we come.
  2432.  
  2433. 555
  2434. 00:33:47,540 --> 00:33:50,800
  2435. GUARD [OVER PA]:
  2436. All visitations limited to five minutes.
  2437.  
  2438. 556
  2439. 00:33:50,960 --> 00:33:53,220
  2440. No spitting in the visitors' room.
  2441.  
  2442. 557
  2443. 00:33:57,220 --> 00:33:58,720
  2444. Herr Doctor...
  2445.  
  2446. 558
  2447. 00:33:58,890 --> 00:34:00,560
  2448. ...I have some news.
  2449.  
  2450. 559
  2451. 00:34:00,720 --> 00:34:02,350
  2452. -It’s your son.
  2453. -Oh.
  2454.  
  2455. 560
  2456. 00:34:02,520 --> 00:34:04,390
  2457. He wants to take over
  2458. the family business.
  2459.  
  2460. 561
  2461. 00:34:05,150 --> 00:34:06,900
  2462. Scotty does?
  2463.  
  2464. 562
  2465. 00:34:07,060 --> 00:34:10,110
  2466. Oh, he’s gotten so evil,
  2467. he has even started losing his hair.
  2468.  
  2469. 563
  2470. 00:34:10,280 --> 00:34:11,690
  2471. l know, it's sweet.
  2472.  
  2473. 564
  2474. 00:34:11,860 --> 00:34:14,900
  2475. Oh, he just wants to make you proud,
  2476. Herr Doctor.
  2477.  
  2478. 565
  2479. 00:34:15,070 --> 00:34:17,450
  2480. After all, it’s hard on the boy
  2481. not having a father.
  2482.  
  2483. 566
  2484. 00:34:17,620 --> 00:34:21,740
  2485. You know, first you were frozen,
  2486. then you were in space, now you're in jail.
  2487.  
  2488. 567
  2489. 00:34:21,910 --> 00:34:24,540
  2490. Well, don't tell me he feels neglected.
  2491.  
  2492. 568
  2493. 00:34:24,710 --> 00:34:27,540
  2494. l was adopted by fricking Belgians, eh?
  2495.  
  2496. 569
  2497. 00:34:27,710 --> 00:34:29,090
  2498. You were adopted?
  2499.  
  2500. 570
  2501. 00:34:29,250 --> 00:34:31,800
  2502. l never met my birth parents.
  2503.  
  2504. 571
  2505. 00:34:31,960 --> 00:34:34,260
  2506. There was a car accident.
  2507.  
  2508. 572
  2509. 00:34:34,510 --> 00:34:37,340
  2510. EVIL:
  2511. I'm told it was a beautiful Belgian day.
  2512.  
  2513. 573
  2514. 00:34:37,510 --> 00:34:41,510
  2515. The smell of waffles and Brussels sprouts
  2516. filled the summer air...
  2517.  
  2518. 574
  2519. 00:34:41,680 --> 00:34:43,350
  2520. ...until....
  2521.  
  2522. 575
  2523. 00:34:44,480 --> 00:34:46,600
  2524. My birth mother was incinerated.
  2525.  
  2526. 576
  2527. 00:34:46,770 --> 00:34:49,810
  2528. l only survived
  2529. because her smoking carcass...
  2530.  
  2531. 577
  2532. 00:34:49,980 --> 00:34:53,610
  2533. ...formed a protective cocoon
  2534. of slaughtered human effluence.
  2535.  
  2536. 578
  2537. 00:34:53,780 --> 00:34:56,860
  2538. EVIL: A Belgian man and his 15-year-old
  2539. love slave with webbed feet...
  2540.  
  2541. 579
  2542. 00:34:57,030 --> 00:34:58,530
  2543. ...was looting the accident scene.
  2544.  
  2545. 580
  2546. 00:34:58,700 --> 00:35:00,910
  2547. They came across a blood-soaked baby,
  2548. moi.
  2549.  
  2550. 581
  2551. 00:35:01,080 --> 00:35:03,120
  2552. EVIL:
  2553. They raised me to be evil.
  2554.  
  2555. 582
  2556. 00:35:03,290 --> 00:35:06,080
  2557. You know, that old chestnut.
  2558.  
  2559. 583
  2560. 00:35:06,250 --> 00:35:07,290
  2561. [SPEAKS IN GERMAN]
  2562.  
  2563. 584
  2564. 00:35:07,460 --> 00:35:10,460
  2565. But nothing compares to this,
  2566. being inside the belly of the beast...
  2567.  
  2568. 585
  2569. 00:35:10,630 --> 00:35:12,750
  2570. ...night after night, all alone.
  2571.  
  2572. 586
  2573. 00:35:12,920 --> 00:35:15,130
  2574. Daddy’s all pent up. Let’s freak!
  2575.  
  2576. 587
  2577. 00:35:15,300 --> 00:35:16,630
  2578. FARBISSINA:
  2579. Oh!
  2580.  
  2581. 588
  2582. 00:35:33,320 --> 00:35:34,360
  2583. Time's up.
  2584.  
  2585. 589
  2586. 00:35:34,530 --> 00:35:37,450
  2587. GUARD [OVER PA]:
  2588. Visiting hours are over. Step to the line.
  2589.  
  2590. 590
  2591. 00:35:37,610 --> 00:35:39,240
  2592. Cuffs up.
  2593.  
  2594. 591
  2595. 00:35:45,080 --> 00:35:46,620
  2596. Move it.
  2597.  
  2598. 592
  2599. 00:35:51,330 --> 00:35:52,750
  2600. Hi, there.
  2601.  
  2602. 593
  2603. 00:35:52,920 --> 00:35:54,800
  2604. How you sleeping? Good?
  2605.  
  2606. 594
  2607. 00:35:57,170 --> 00:36:00,010
  2608. Gentlemen, listen up, y'all.
  2609.  
  2610. 595
  2611. 00:36:00,180 --> 00:36:02,180
  2612. Here's the new plan:
  2613.  
  2614. 596
  2615. 00:36:02,350 --> 00:36:04,220
  2616. You're gonna start a riot...
  2617.  
  2618. 597
  2619. 00:36:04,390 --> 00:36:07,520
  2620. ...and we’re gonna
  2621. walk out the front door.
  2622.  
  2623. 598
  2624. 00:36:07,680 --> 00:36:10,100
  2625. [ALL LAUGHING]
  2626.  
  2627. 599
  2628. 00:36:10,270 --> 00:36:11,600
  2629. Hey, man.
  2630.  
  2631. 600
  2632. 00:36:12,270 --> 00:36:14,820
  2633. l know guys on crack
  2634. that makes more sense than you.
  2635.  
  2636. 601
  2637. 00:36:15,480 --> 00:36:16,530
  2638. Really?
  2639.  
  2640. 602
  2641. 00:36:16,690 --> 00:36:19,780
  2642. Then let me put it to you this way, cuz.
  2643.  
  2644. 603
  2645. 00:36:20,700 --> 00:36:22,700
  2646. ["HARD KNOCK LIFE" PLAYING]
  2647.  
  2648. 604
  2649. 00:36:25,370 --> 00:36:26,700
  2650. Yeah.
  2651.  
  2652. 605
  2653. 00:36:27,370 --> 00:36:29,960
  2654. -[MOUTHS] Instead of treated
  2655. -[MOUTHS] We get tricked
  2656.  
  2657. 606
  2658. 00:36:30,540 --> 00:36:33,290
  2659. -Instead of kisses
  2660. -We get kicked
  2661.  
  2662. 607
  2663. 00:36:33,460 --> 00:36:34,540
  2664. It's the hard knock
  2665.  
  2666. 608
  2667. 00:36:34,710 --> 00:36:36,800
  2668. [SINGING] I don't know how to be
  2669. No crib on MTV
  2670.  
  2671. 609
  2672. 00:36:36,960 --> 00:36:39,050
  2673. God only knows
  2674. Got my Mini Me in the G.P.
  2675.  
  2676. 610
  2677. 00:36:39,220 --> 00:36:41,260
  2678. See how it goes
  2679. Evil's all that I see
  2680.  
  2681. 611
  2682. 00:36:41,430 --> 00:36:43,550
  2683. And you ask me my name?
  2684. D to the rizzo
  2685.  
  2686. 612
  2687. 00:36:43,720 --> 00:36:45,390
  2688. E to the vizzo
  2689. I to the lizzo
  2690.  
  2691. 613
  2692. 00:36:45,560 --> 00:36:47,770
  2693. I'm a crazy
  2694. Y'all knew that
  2695.  
  2696. 614
  2697. 00:36:47,970 --> 00:36:51,060
  2698. Austin caught me in the first act
  2699. It's all backwards, what's with that?
  2700.  
  2701. 615
  2702. 00:36:51,230 --> 00:36:53,900
  2703. So I'll make a prophecy
  2704. From the dogs to the Mini Me
  2705.  
  2706. 616
  2707. 00:36:54,060 --> 00:36:56,730
  2708. Give me an Escalade, a two-way
  2709. Bling bling on eBay
  2710.  
  2711. 617
  2712. 00:36:56,900 --> 00:36:58,650
  2713. Domino
  2714.  
  2715. 618
  2716. 00:37:02,570 --> 00:37:04,740
  2717. Stick that in your pipe and smoke it
  2718.  
  2719. 619
  2720. 00:37:04,910 --> 00:37:06,580
  2721. [MOUTHS]
  2722. Instead of treated
  2723.  
  2724. 620
  2725. 00:37:07,450 --> 00:37:09,830
  2726. EVIL:
  2727. This is for all my homeys in Bruges
  2728.  
  2729. 621
  2730. 00:37:12,920 --> 00:37:14,580
  2731. Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh
  2732.  
  2733. 622
  2734. 00:37:17,550 --> 00:37:19,420
  2735. Ah, Cristal.
  2736.  
  2737. 623
  2738. 00:37:19,590 --> 00:37:20,630
  2739. My Moto.
  2740.  
  2741. 624
  2742. 00:37:20,800 --> 00:37:22,260
  2743. A couple of beyotches.
  2744.  
  2745. 625
  2746. 00:37:22,430 --> 00:37:23,930
  2747. Why not?
  2748.  
  2749. 626
  2750. 00:37:24,510 --> 00:37:26,640
  2751. I gotta bust a move
  2752. Drop and bust a groove
  2753.  
  2754. 627
  2755. 00:37:26,810 --> 00:37:29,060
  2756. Feelin' fine, got an evil crew
  2757. Goldmember too
  2758.  
  2759. 628
  2760. 00:37:29,220 --> 00:37:30,220
  2761. Lick my 9
  2762.  
  2763. 629
  2764. 00:37:30,390 --> 00:37:32,940
  2765. Till then I'll...on my...butt
  2766. Brains out
  2767.  
  2768. 630
  2769. 00:37:33,100 --> 00:37:35,770
  2770. Put...on call
  2771. And splooge in your...that's all
  2772.  
  2773. 631
  2774. 00:37:35,940 --> 00:37:37,690
  2775. Fo' shizzle my nizzle, y'all
  2776.  
  2777. 632
  2778. 00:37:40,990 --> 00:37:42,320
  2779. Yeah.
  2780.  
  2781. 633
  2782. 00:37:42,950 --> 00:37:44,410
  2783. All right, Listen up.
  2784.  
  2785. 634
  2786. 00:37:44,570 --> 00:37:47,200
  2787. Tonight, 8 p.m.,
  2788. you're going to start a riot.
  2789.  
  2790. 635
  2791. 00:37:47,370 --> 00:37:49,620
  2792. ALL:
  2793. Yes, Dr. Evil.
  2794.  
  2795. 636
  2796. 00:37:49,790 --> 00:37:53,290
  2797. GUARD [OVER PA]: Attention, all guards.
  2798. There is a riot in progress.
  2799.  
  2800. 637
  2801. 00:37:53,460 --> 00:37:55,290
  2802. Seal all exits.
  2803.  
  2804. 638
  2805. 00:37:55,460 --> 00:38:00,340
  2806. Attention. Dr. Evil and his clone
  2807. are trying to escape.
  2808.  
  2809. 639
  2810. 00:38:00,510 --> 00:38:04,380
  2811. All guards report to Cell Block A
  2812. immediately.
  2813.  
  2814. 640
  2815. 00:38:04,550 --> 00:38:07,640
  2816. Dr. Evil and his clone are getting away.
  2817.  
  2818. 641
  2819. 00:38:07,800 --> 00:38:09,810
  2820. [DOGS Barking]
  2821.  
  2822. 642
  2823. 00:38:16,480 --> 00:38:17,980
  2824. There you are.
  2825.  
  2826. 643
  2827. 00:38:18,150 --> 00:38:20,980
  2828. -Good morning, sunshine.
  2829. -Good morning.
  2830.  
  2831. 644
  2832. 00:38:21,150 --> 00:38:22,440
  2833. How did you sleep?
  2834.  
  2835. 645
  2836. 00:38:22,610 --> 00:38:25,990
  2837. -Great.
  2838. -Me too. If these lips could talk.
  2839.  
  2840. 646
  2841. 00:38:26,160 --> 00:38:27,450
  2842. [LAUGHS]
  2843.  
  2844. 647
  2845. 00:38:27,620 --> 00:38:29,830
  2846. Mm. Oh, hello.
  2847.  
  2848. 648
  2849. 00:38:31,040 --> 00:38:33,080
  2850. You have the right to remain sexy, sugar.
  2851.  
  2852. 649
  2853. 00:38:33,250 --> 00:38:35,540
  2854. Oh. l hope there's a search involved.
  2855.  
  2856. 650
  2857. 00:38:35,710 --> 00:38:37,960
  2858. [BOTH LAUGH]
  2859.  
  2860. 651
  2861. 00:38:38,130 --> 00:38:39,250
  2862. COMPUTER:
  2863. You've got mail.
  2864.  
  2865. 652
  2866. 00:38:39,420 --> 00:38:41,840
  2867. So, what does this thing do?
  2868.  
  2869. 653
  2870. 00:38:42,010 --> 00:38:43,510
  2871. Well, it's called the Internet...
  2872.  
  2873. 654
  2874. 00:38:43,670 --> 00:38:46,050
  2875. ...and it's completely revolutionized
  2876. the way we live...
  2877.  
  2878. 655
  2879. 00:38:46,220 --> 00:38:47,840
  2880. ...and access vital information.
  2881.  
  2882. 656
  2883. 00:38:48,010 --> 00:38:49,970
  2884. For example, have a look at this:
  2885.  
  2886. 657
  2887. 00:38:50,140 --> 00:38:51,470
  2888. WOMAN 1:
  2889. Oh, look at the monkey.
  2890.  
  2891. 658
  2892. 00:38:51,640 --> 00:38:54,680
  2893. WOMAN 2: Oh, he's got his finger on his--
  2894. WOMAN 1: Oh, no. Watch out.
  2895.  
  2896. 659
  2897. 00:38:57,270 --> 00:38:59,770
  2898. Wow. Now, that's vital information.
  2899.  
  2900. 660
  2901. 00:38:59,940 --> 00:39:01,440
  2902. l know. It’s amazing.
  2903.  
  2904. 661
  2905. 00:39:01,610 --> 00:39:02,940
  2906. [ELEVATOR DINGS]
  2907.  
  2908. 662
  2909. 00:39:04,190 --> 00:39:07,030
  2910. Oh, Basil. What's happening, baby?
  2911.  
  2912. 663
  2913. 00:39:07,200 --> 00:39:08,860
  2914. A lot is happening, Foxxy.
  2915.  
  2916. 664
  2917. 00:39:09,030 --> 00:39:11,120
  2918. Dr. Evil has escaped.
  2919.  
  2920. 665
  2921. 00:39:11,530 --> 00:39:13,330
  2922. The good news is that
  2923. one of our agents...
  2924.  
  2925. 666
  2926. 00:39:13,500 --> 00:39:16,870
  2927. ...has managed to infiltrate
  2928. Dr. Evil's organization.
  2929.  
  2930. 667
  2931. 00:39:17,040 --> 00:39:20,710
  2932. Excellent. We’ve been trying for years
  2933. to get a mole inside Dr. Evil’s lair.
  2934.  
  2935. 668
  2936. 00:39:20,880 --> 00:39:22,840
  2937. -We now have that mole.
  2938. -Yes.
  2939.  
  2940. 669
  2941. 00:39:23,000 --> 00:39:24,300
  2942. [ELEVATOR DINGS]
  2943.  
  2944. 670
  2945. 00:39:24,460 --> 00:39:26,300
  2946. And here he is.
  2947.  
  2948. 671
  2949. 00:39:28,050 --> 00:39:29,340
  2950. So you're the--
  2951.  
  2952. 672
  2953. 00:39:30,140 --> 00:39:33,890
  2954. Mo....
  2955.  
  2956. 673
  2957. 00:39:34,060 --> 00:39:35,930
  2958. Most. Most.
  2959.  
  2960. 674
  2961. 00:39:36,100 --> 00:39:38,480
  2962. -Most.
  2963. -Most excellent agent we've ever seen.
  2964.  
  2965. 675
  2966. 00:39:38,650 --> 00:39:40,900
  2967. Yes, most excellent agent we’ve ever seen.
  2968.  
  2969. 676
  2970. 00:39:41,060 --> 00:39:42,900
  2971. -Mm-hm.
  2972. -Thank you.
  2973.  
  2974. 677
  2975. 00:39:43,070 --> 00:39:44,570
  2976. Thank you.
  2977.  
  2978. 678
  2979. 00:39:44,730 --> 00:39:47,400
  2980. Now, l wasn't able to get an exact Location,
  2981. but l did learn...
  2982.  
  2983. 679
  2984. 00:39:47,570 --> 00:39:50,360
  2985. ...that Dr. Evil has moved to a new lair
  2986. outside of Tokyo, Japan.
  2987.  
  2988. 680
  2989. 00:39:50,530 --> 00:39:52,410
  2990. Hmm.
  2991.  
  2992. 681
  2993. 00:39:53,950 --> 00:39:56,580
  2994. By the way, l realize
  2995. that l have a large mole on my face.
  2996.  
  2997. 682
  2998. 00:39:57,910 --> 00:39:59,500
  2999. Where? Ha, ha.
  3000.  
  3001. 683
  3002. 00:39:59,670 --> 00:40:02,330
  3003. What? Where's that mole? Heh, heh.
  3004.  
  3005. 684
  3006. 00:40:02,500 --> 00:40:04,590
  3007. l didn't see one.
  3008.  
  3009. 685
  3010. 00:40:05,420 --> 00:40:09,050
  3011. l also realize the irony
  3012. that l am myself a mole.
  3013.  
  3014. 686
  3015. 00:40:09,930 --> 00:40:12,850
  3016. No one would make that connection.
  3017.  
  3018. 687
  3019. 00:40:14,930 --> 00:40:17,770
  3020. Anyway, well done, old chap.
  3021.  
  3022. 688
  3023. 00:40:17,930 --> 00:40:18,980
  3024. Jolly good work.
  3025.  
  3026. 689
  3027. 00:40:19,140 --> 00:40:22,440
  3028. Yes, nice to mole you-- Meet you.
  3029. Nice to meet your mole.
  3030.  
  3031. 690
  3032. 00:40:22,610 --> 00:40:23,770
  3033. -Don't say "mole."
  3034. -Stop.
  3035.  
  3036. 691
  3037. 00:40:23,940 --> 00:40:25,980
  3038. -l said "mole."
  3039. -Stop.
  3040.  
  3041. 692
  3042. 00:40:26,740 --> 00:40:28,400
  3043. [MOUTHS]
  3044. Stop.
  3045.  
  3046. 693
  3047. 00:40:29,450 --> 00:40:31,110
  3048. -Bye.
  3049. AUSTIN: Mole.
  3050.  
  3051. 694
  3052. 00:40:35,330 --> 00:40:36,620
  3053. Mole.
  3054.  
  3055. 695
  3056. 00:40:36,790 --> 00:40:38,500
  3057. [MOUTHS]
  3058. Stop.
  3059.  
  3060. 696
  3061. 00:40:40,500 --> 00:40:43,210
  3062. -Mole.
  3063. -Oh, shut up!
  3064.  
  3065. 697
  3066. 00:40:45,460 --> 00:40:48,800
  3067. Moley-moley-moley-moIey-moley.
  3068.  
  3069. 698
  3070. 00:40:57,220 --> 00:40:59,220
  3071. [SUBMARINE FARTS]
  3072.  
  3073. 699
  3074. 00:41:02,810 --> 00:41:04,900
  3075. Up, periscope.
  3076.  
  3077. 700
  3078. 00:41:09,990 --> 00:41:11,820
  3079. Ladies and gentlemen...
  3080.  
  3081. 701
  3082. 00:41:11,990 --> 00:41:14,160
  3083. ...welcome to my new submarine lair.
  3084.  
  3085. 702
  3086. 00:41:16,160 --> 00:41:19,240
  3087. It’s long and hard and full of seamen.
  3088.  
  3089. 703
  3090. 00:41:21,000 --> 00:41:22,330
  3091. [LAUGHS]
  3092.  
  3093. 704
  3094. 00:41:24,130 --> 00:41:26,170
  3095. Nothing? No?
  3096.  
  3097. 705
  3098. 00:41:26,340 --> 00:41:27,590
  3099. Not even a titter?
  3100.  
  3101. 706
  3102. 00:41:27,750 --> 00:41:28,960
  3103. Tough sub.
  3104.  
  3105. 707
  3106. 00:41:29,130 --> 00:41:31,920
  3107. Dr. Evil, you look very tight.
  3108.  
  3109. 708
  3110. 00:41:32,090 --> 00:41:33,590
  3111. Yes, tight like a tiger.
  3112.  
  3113. 709
  3114. 00:41:33,760 --> 00:41:35,180
  3115. -Yes, yes, yes.
  3116. -Really?
  3117.  
  3118. 710
  3119. 00:41:35,350 --> 00:41:37,140
  3120. Yes, you look like a macho man.
  3121.  
  3122. 711
  3123. 00:41:37,310 --> 00:41:39,140
  3124. Village People.
  3125.  
  3126. 712
  3127. 00:41:39,310 --> 00:41:40,520
  3128. You know, Goldmember...
  3129.  
  3130. 713
  3131. 00:41:40,680 --> 00:41:43,770
  3132. ...I don't think that’s something
  3133. one dude should say to another dude.
  3134.  
  3135. 714
  3136. 00:41:43,940 --> 00:41:46,480
  3137. Yeah. A little creepy. Mm-hm.
  3138.  
  3139. 715
  3140. 00:41:46,650 --> 00:41:51,440
  3141. Oh, yes. Yes, yes, yes.
  3142. This is a keeper. Oi.
  3143.  
  3144. 716
  3145. 00:41:51,610 --> 00:41:52,860
  3146. Yes.
  3147.  
  3148. 717
  3149. 00:41:53,030 --> 00:41:56,990
  3150. All right, you're not gonna put that skin
  3151. in your mouth, are you?
  3152.  
  3153. 718
  3154. 00:41:58,490 --> 00:42:00,990
  3155. You did. Okay, that’s just gross.
  3156.  
  3157. 719
  3158. 00:42:02,210 --> 00:42:04,460
  3159. Yes, salty. Yes, that was good.
  3160.  
  3161. 720
  3162. 00:42:04,620 --> 00:42:06,710
  3163. Ladies and gentlemen...
  3164.  
  3165. 721
  3166. 00:42:08,250 --> 00:42:09,920
  3167. ...as you know...
  3168.  
  3169. 722
  3170. 00:42:10,090 --> 00:42:12,840
  3171. ...we've been designing
  3172. a "tractor beam"...
  3173.  
  3174. 723
  3175. 00:42:13,010 --> 00:42:15,130
  3176. ...code-named Preparation H.
  3177.  
  3178. 724
  3179. 00:42:15,300 --> 00:42:19,050
  3180. -Heh-heh-heh.
  3181. -It’s powerful enough to pull the meteor...
  3182.  
  3183. 725
  3184. 00:42:19,220 --> 00:42:23,060
  3185. ..."Midas 22" into a collision course
  3186. with the Earth.
  3187.  
  3188. 726
  3189. 00:42:23,230 --> 00:42:27,600
  3190. Upon entering the atmosphere,
  3191. the hot ball of magma...
  3192.  
  3193. 727
  3194. 00:42:27,770 --> 00:42:31,610
  3195. ...will strike and melt the polar icecaps,
  3196. causing a global flood.
  3197.  
  3198. 728
  3199. 00:42:31,780 --> 00:42:36,240
  3200. But enough of my technical mumbo jumbo.
  3201. Allow me to demonstrate.
  3202.  
  3203. 729
  3204. 00:42:36,410 --> 00:42:37,870
  3205. [SPEAKS IN YIDDISH]
  3206.  
  3207. 730
  3208. 00:42:40,740 --> 00:42:41,910
  3209. Lower the globe.
  3210.  
  3211. 731
  3212. 00:42:42,080 --> 00:42:43,910
  3213. [SHRIEKS]
  3214. Lower the globe!
  3215.  
  3216. 732
  3217. 00:42:45,080 --> 00:42:47,250
  3218. EVIL:
  3219. Ow! Ow!
  3220.  
  3221. 733
  3222. 00:42:47,420 --> 00:42:48,750
  3223. [SPEAKS IN GERMAN]
  3224.  
  3225. 734
  3226. 00:42:48,920 --> 00:42:51,000
  3227. EVIL:
  3228. Well, congratulations, numbnuts.
  3229.  
  3230. 735
  3231. 00:42:51,170 --> 00:42:55,220
  3232. You've succeeded in turning me
  3233. into a fricking jack-in-the-box.
  3234.  
  3235. 736
  3236. 00:42:55,380 --> 00:42:57,840
  3237. Get it off. Get it off. It's dark, it's dark.
  3238.  
  3239. 737
  3240. 00:42:58,010 --> 00:42:59,720
  3241. I’m okay. I’m okay.
  3242.  
  3243. 738
  3244. 00:42:59,890 --> 00:43:01,140
  3245. [CHUCKLES]
  3246.  
  3247. 739
  3248. 00:43:01,310 --> 00:43:02,930
  3249. Release the meteor.
  3250.  
  3251. 740
  3252. 00:43:03,100 --> 00:43:05,100
  3253. [SHRIEKS]
  3254. Release the meteor!
  3255.  
  3256. 741
  3257. 00:43:06,770 --> 00:43:08,270
  3258. -Ow!
  3259. -Oh....
  3260.  
  3261. 742
  3262. 00:43:08,440 --> 00:43:10,110
  3263. [MOANING]
  3264.  
  3265. 743
  3266. 00:43:10,270 --> 00:43:11,360
  3267. No way.
  3268.  
  3269. 744
  3270. 00:43:11,520 --> 00:43:13,030
  3271. Right in the kniggin.
  3272.  
  3273. 745
  3274. 00:43:13,190 --> 00:43:16,240
  3275. -Goddamn it. Oh!
  3276. -Ow.
  3277.  
  3278. 746
  3279. 00:43:16,400 --> 00:43:17,950
  3280. Guys.
  3281.  
  3282. 747
  3283. 00:43:18,450 --> 00:43:19,780
  3284. Way to go, A-hole.
  3285.  
  3286. 748
  3287. 00:43:19,950 --> 00:43:24,290
  3288. All right, hold on while I try
  3289. and find my balls, for God's sakes.
  3290.  
  3291. 749
  3292. 00:43:24,450 --> 00:43:26,660
  3293. One, two and three.
  3294.  
  3295. 750
  3296. 00:43:26,830 --> 00:43:28,620
  3297. Okay. I'm okay.
  3298.  
  3299. 751
  3300. 00:43:28,790 --> 00:43:32,710
  3301. Dr. Evil, we still have
  3302. the ultimate insurance policy.
  3303.  
  3304. 752
  3305. 00:43:32,880 --> 00:43:34,300
  3306. May l present to you...
  3307.  
  3308. 753
  3309. 00:43:34,460 --> 00:43:37,670
  3310. ...the very sexual, the very tight...
  3311.  
  3312. 754
  3313. 00:43:37,880 --> 00:43:40,970
  3314. ...Austin Powers' father.
  3315.  
  3316. 755
  3317. 00:43:41,140 --> 00:43:43,810
  3318. -His what?
  3319. -His father, Dr. Evil.
  3320.  
  3321. 756
  3322. 00:43:43,970 --> 00:43:45,720
  3323. His "farger"?
  3324.  
  3325. 757
  3326. 00:43:46,390 --> 00:43:50,100
  3327. -What's a farger?
  3328. -His father. You know, the father.
  3329.  
  3330. 758
  3331. 00:43:50,270 --> 00:43:54,940
  3332. Yeah. Goldmember, I don't speak
  3333. freaky-deaky Dutch, okay, perv boy?
  3334.  
  3335. 759
  3336. 00:43:55,110 --> 00:43:57,240
  3337. Father. His dad. Dad is father.
  3338.  
  3339. 760
  3340. 00:43:57,400 --> 00:43:58,530
  3341. Oh, his dad?
  3342.  
  3343. 761
  3344. 00:43:58,700 --> 00:44:00,990
  3345. Oh, his father.
  3346.  
  3347. 762
  3348. 00:44:01,160 --> 00:44:03,660
  3349. Yes, I have a Dutch accent.
  3350. Isn’t that weird?
  3351.  
  3352. 763
  3353. 00:44:03,830 --> 00:44:05,740
  3354. Father. Father.
  3355.  
  3356. 764
  3357. 00:44:06,500 --> 00:44:09,000
  3358. Ah, Nigel Powers.
  3359.  
  3360. 765
  3361. 00:44:09,170 --> 00:44:10,500
  3362. NIGEL:
  3363. Hello, hello.
  3364.  
  3365. 766
  3366. 00:44:12,000 --> 00:44:13,960
  3367. [FARBISSINA SQUEALS
  3368. THEN NIGEL LAUGHS]
  3369.  
  3370. 767
  3371. 00:44:14,130 --> 00:44:18,470
  3372. -Bring him to me.
  3373. -Easy peezy, lemon squeezy.
  3374.  
  3375. 768
  3376. 00:44:18,630 --> 00:44:21,720
  3377. Oh, put the guns down.
  3378. Is this the first day on the job or something?
  3379.  
  3380. 769
  3381. 00:44:21,890 --> 00:44:25,510
  3382. Look, this is how it goes.
  3383. You attack me one at a time...
  3384.  
  3385. 770
  3386. 00:44:25,680 --> 00:44:28,930
  3387. ...and l knock you out with a single punch.
  3388. Okay? Go.
  3389.  
  3390. 771
  3391. 00:44:29,100 --> 00:44:30,520
  3392. -Judo chop.
  3393. -Oh, he's good.
  3394.  
  3395. 772
  3396. 00:44:30,690 --> 00:44:31,940
  3397. Judo chop.
  3398.  
  3399. 773
  3400. 00:44:32,610 --> 00:44:33,980
  3401. Do you know who I am?
  3402.  
  3403. 774
  3404. 00:44:34,400 --> 00:44:36,730
  3405. Have you any idea
  3406. how many anonymous henchmen...
  3407.  
  3408. 775
  3409. 00:44:36,900 --> 00:44:39,360
  3410. ...I've killed over the years?
  3411. And look at you.
  3412.  
  3413. 776
  3414. 00:44:39,530 --> 00:44:42,530
  3415. You haven't even got a nametag.
  3416. You got no chance.
  3417.  
  3418. 777
  3419. 00:44:42,700 --> 00:44:44,160
  3420. Why don't you just fall down?
  3421.  
  3422. 778
  3423. 00:44:44,330 --> 00:44:46,240
  3424. Go on, son.
  3425.  
  3426. 779
  3427. 00:44:48,120 --> 00:44:51,620
  3428. All right, Dr. Evil, give yourself up
  3429. while you've still got a chance.
  3430.  
  3431. 780
  3432. 00:44:51,790 --> 00:44:53,210
  3433. [GUN COCKS]
  3434.  
  3435. 781
  3436. 00:44:53,380 --> 00:44:56,340
  3437. Okay. Okay. You've got me.
  3438.  
  3439. 782
  3440. 00:44:56,500 --> 00:44:58,880
  3441. Nigel Powers, meet...
  3442.  
  3443. 783
  3444. 00:44:59,800 --> 00:45:01,550
  3445. -...Mini Me.
  3446. NIGEL: Oh, blimey.
  3447.  
  3448. 784
  3449. 00:45:01,720 --> 00:45:03,050
  3450. l thought l smelled cabbage.
  3451.  
  3452. 785
  3453. 00:45:04,220 --> 00:45:05,390
  3454. Take him away.
  3455.  
  3456. 786
  3457. 00:45:05,560 --> 00:45:09,560
  3458. Uh, Dr. Evil, can l paint his yoo-hoo gold?
  3459.  
  3460. 787
  3461. 00:45:09,730 --> 00:45:12,390
  3462. It’s kind of my thing, you know.
  3463.  
  3464. 788
  3465. 00:45:18,070 --> 00:45:21,490
  3466. How about no, you crazy Dutch bastard?
  3467.  
  3468. 789
  3469. 00:45:23,780 --> 00:45:25,950
  3470. MAN [OVER PA]:
  3471. Attention, henchmen, it's health week.
  3472.  
  3473. 790
  3474. 00:45:26,120 --> 00:45:28,740
  3475. Don't forget your physical.
  3476. Dr. Evil's orders.
  3477.  
  3478. 791
  3479. 00:45:32,830 --> 00:45:35,830
  3480. You know, l think it's a shame
  3481. the way they treat you.
  3482.  
  3483. 792
  3484. 00:45:36,000 --> 00:45:38,590
  3485. Just because
  3486. you're one-eighth their size...
  3487.  
  3488. 793
  3489. 00:45:38,760 --> 00:45:41,760
  3490. ...doesn't mean you deserve
  3491. one-eighth of their respect.
  3492.  
  3493. 794
  3494. 00:45:42,430 --> 00:45:44,050
  3495. Does it?
  3496.  
  3497. 795
  3498. 00:45:44,220 --> 00:45:46,930
  3499. Say, mini-fella, I'm, uh...
  3500.  
  3501. 796
  3502. 00:45:47,100 --> 00:45:48,930
  3503. ...I'm curious.
  3504.  
  3505. 797
  3506. 00:45:49,430 --> 00:45:52,770
  3507. Is, uh, everything in proportion?
  3508.  
  3509. 798
  3510. 00:45:54,270 --> 00:45:56,940
  3511. You know, your bobby-dangler,
  3512. your general, two colonels...
  3513.  
  3514. 799
  3515. 00:45:57,110 --> 00:45:59,360
  3516. ...your giggle stick, master of ceremonies.
  3517.  
  3518. 800
  3519. 00:46:00,690 --> 00:46:02,940
  3520. Yeah. Oh, don't be shy. Let's have a look.
  3521.  
  3522. 801
  3523. 00:46:08,580 --> 00:46:10,290
  3524. My word.
  3525.  
  3526. 802
  3527. 00:46:10,450 --> 00:46:11,950
  3528. You're a tripod.
  3529.  
  3530. 803
  3531. 00:46:12,120 --> 00:46:13,540
  3532. [NIGEL CHUCKLES]
  3533.  
  3534. 804
  3535. 00:46:13,710 --> 00:46:17,580
  3536. What do you feed that thing, eh?
  3537. It’s like a baby's arm holding an apple.
  3538.  
  3539. 805
  3540. 00:46:17,750 --> 00:46:18,790
  3541. [NIGEL CHUCKLES]
  3542.  
  3543. 806
  3544. 00:46:19,250 --> 00:46:23,470
  3545. The good news is, you ever get tired,
  3546. you can use it as a kickstand.
  3547.  
  3548. 807
  3549. 00:46:28,720 --> 00:46:32,560
  3550. l think we both know who the real brains is
  3551. behind this operation, eh?
  3552.  
  3553. 808
  3554. 00:46:32,730 --> 00:46:33,770
  3555. Mm-hm.
  3556.  
  3557. 809
  3558. 00:46:33,940 --> 00:46:34,940
  3559. [NIGEL LAUGHS]
  3560.  
  3561. 810
  3562. 00:46:47,820 --> 00:46:50,780
  3563. Tokyo à gogo, baby. Yeah.
  3564.  
  3565. 811
  3566. 00:46:50,950 --> 00:46:52,450
  3567. [CELL PHONE RINGS]
  3568.  
  3569. 812
  3570. 00:46:52,620 --> 00:46:54,250
  3571. Oh, what's kicking, Basil?
  3572.  
  3573. 813
  3574. 00:46:54,410 --> 00:46:57,170
  3575. A lot's kicking, Foxxy. Austin...
  3576.  
  3577. 814
  3578. 00:46:57,330 --> 00:47:01,590
  3579. ...one of Dr. Evil's henchmen
  3580. has been spotted at the Asahi Sumo Arena.
  3581.  
  3582. 815
  3583. 00:47:01,750 --> 00:47:03,670
  3584. Proceed there immediately.
  3585.  
  3586. 816
  3587. 00:47:03,840 --> 00:47:05,170
  3588. Thanks, Basil.
  3589.  
  3590. 817
  3591. 00:47:07,430 --> 00:47:09,430
  3592. [MAN SPEAKING IN JAPANESE OVER PA]
  3593.  
  3594. 818
  3595. 00:47:11,390 --> 00:47:16,140
  3596. Ah, Jesus Christ.
  3597. This diaper's making my nuts rub together.
  3598.  
  3599. 819
  3600. 00:47:16,310 --> 00:47:19,190
  3601. It’s gonna start a fire.
  3602.  
  3603. 820
  3604. 00:47:19,360 --> 00:47:21,110
  3605. That's Fat Bastard.
  3606.  
  3607. 821
  3608. 00:47:21,270 --> 00:47:25,030
  3609. [SPEAKING IN JAPANESE]
  3610. ...Fat Bastard.
  3611.  
  3612. 822
  3613. 00:47:25,190 --> 00:47:26,450
  3614. [AUDIENCE BOOING]
  3615.  
  3616. 823
  3617. 00:47:26,610 --> 00:47:28,610
  3618. [REFEREE SPEAKING IN JAPANESE]
  3619.  
  3620. 824
  3621. 00:47:28,780 --> 00:47:31,120
  3622. [FAT BASTARD GRUNTING]
  3623.  
  3624. 825
  3625. 00:47:34,790 --> 00:47:36,200
  3626. [GRUNTS]
  3627.  
  3628. 826
  3629. 00:47:36,370 --> 00:47:37,370
  3630. [MOANS]
  3631.  
  3632. 827
  3633. 00:47:37,540 --> 00:47:39,880
  3634. You know what my favorite
  3635. Helen Hunt movie is?
  3636.  
  3637. 828
  3638. 00:47:40,040 --> 00:47:41,040
  3639. Twister.
  3640.  
  3641. 829
  3642. 00:47:41,210 --> 00:47:42,880
  3643. [SCREAMING]
  3644.  
  3645. 830
  3646. 00:47:47,340 --> 00:47:48,720
  3647. Oh!
  3648.  
  3649. 831
  3650. 00:47:48,890 --> 00:47:51,390
  3651. [SPEAKING IN JAPANESE]
  3652. Fat Bastard...
  3653.  
  3654. 832
  3655. 00:47:51,550 --> 00:47:52,890
  3656. [AUDIENCE BOOING]
  3657.  
  3658. 833
  3659. 00:47:53,060 --> 00:47:55,350
  3660. -That's not right.
  3661. -Sure ain't.
  3662.  
  3663. 834
  3664. 00:47:55,520 --> 00:47:57,350
  3665. Are we done here?
  3666.  
  3667. 835
  3668. 00:47:57,520 --> 00:47:59,690
  3669. I’ve got to take a crap.
  3670.  
  3671. 836
  3672. 00:48:01,400 --> 00:48:02,770
  3673. AUSTIN:
  3674. Wait a tick.
  3675.  
  3676. 837
  3677. 00:48:02,940 --> 00:48:05,030
  3678. Something doesn't smell right.
  3679.  
  3680. 838
  3681. 00:48:05,190 --> 00:48:07,740
  3682. And l think it's Fat Bastard.
  3683.  
  3684. 839
  3685. 00:48:07,900 --> 00:48:12,320
  3686. FAT BASTARD [SINGING]:
  3687. On top of spaghetti
  3688.  
  3689. 840
  3690. 00:48:12,490 --> 00:48:16,080
  3691. All covered in-- Ahh! --cheese
  3692.  
  3693. 841
  3694. 00:48:17,250 --> 00:48:21,500
  3695. I lost my poor meatball
  3696.  
  3697. 842
  3698. 00:48:21,670 --> 00:48:23,000
  3699. 'Cause somebody--
  3700.  
  3701. 843
  3702. 00:48:23,170 --> 00:48:24,750
  3703. [FAT BASTARD GRUNTS]
  3704.  
  3705. 844
  3706. 00:48:25,460 --> 00:48:30,050
  3707. -[WHISPERING] You okay, Austin?
  3708. -Sound as a pound, love. Yeah. Good.
  3709.  
  3710. 845
  3711. 00:48:30,760 --> 00:48:34,180
  3712. What the--? I didn't have any corn.
  3713.  
  3714. 846
  3715. 00:48:34,760 --> 00:48:36,430
  3716. [TOILET FLUSHES]
  3717.  
  3718. 847
  3719. 00:48:38,430 --> 00:48:40,100
  3720. Aah!
  3721.  
  3722. 848
  3723. 00:48:41,190 --> 00:48:42,440
  3724. [AUSTIN Choking]
  3725.  
  3726. 849
  3727. 00:48:49,030 --> 00:48:50,450
  3728. FAT BASTARD:
  3729. Hey, diaper lady.
  3730.  
  3731. 850
  3732. 00:48:51,200 --> 00:48:52,740
  3733. Here's my diaper.
  3734.  
  3735. 851
  3736. 00:48:52,910 --> 00:48:54,240
  3737. [FAT BASTARD LAUGHS]
  3738.  
  3739. 852
  3740. 00:48:54,410 --> 00:48:56,540
  3741. l think l might have pinched one off
  3742. too soon.
  3743.  
  3744. 853
  3745. 00:48:59,040 --> 00:49:02,370
  3746. Oh, l left a rosebud in there for you.
  3747.  
  3748. 854
  3749. 00:49:02,540 --> 00:49:03,880
  3750. [FAT BASTARD LAUGHS]
  3751.  
  3752. 855
  3753. 00:49:04,880 --> 00:49:06,880
  3754. [SCREAMING]
  3755.  
  3756. 856
  3757. 00:49:11,720 --> 00:49:14,470
  3758. You really are a fat bastard.
  3759.  
  3760. 857
  3761. 00:49:14,640 --> 00:49:17,970
  3762. You know, that hurts my feelings.
  3763. l tried going on a diet, you know.
  3764.  
  3765. 858
  3766. 00:49:18,140 --> 00:49:21,640
  3767. The Zone. You know,
  3768. "carbs are the enemy"?
  3769.  
  3770. 859
  3771. 00:49:22,230 --> 00:49:24,310
  3772. We don't like carbs,
  3773. you know what I mean?
  3774.  
  3775. 860
  3776. 00:49:24,650 --> 00:49:25,860
  3777. Oh.
  3778.  
  3779. 861
  3780. 00:49:27,530 --> 00:49:28,900
  3781. Who's your friend?
  3782.  
  3783. 862
  3784. 00:49:30,150 --> 00:49:32,650
  3785. Oh, I'd like to have a go with that filly.
  3786.  
  3787. 863
  3788. 00:49:32,820 --> 00:49:35,370
  3789. Oh, do you find me sexy?
  3790.  
  3791. 864
  3792. 00:49:35,530 --> 00:49:37,410
  3793. Oh, look at my titties.
  3794.  
  3795. 865
  3796. 00:49:37,580 --> 00:49:38,830
  3797. [MOANING]
  3798.  
  3799. 866
  3800. 00:49:39,000 --> 00:49:42,330
  3801. -Shut your mouth.
  3802. -Mm, yeah.
  3803.  
  3804. 867
  3805. 00:49:42,920 --> 00:49:44,420
  3806. All right, that's enough.
  3807.  
  3808. 868
  3809. 00:49:44,580 --> 00:49:46,590
  3810. Okay, you got me.
  3811.  
  3812. 869
  3813. 00:49:46,750 --> 00:49:48,170
  3814. -Put it there, would you?
  3815. -Okay.
  3816.  
  3817. 870
  3818. 00:49:48,340 --> 00:49:50,340
  3819. [BOTH GRUNTING]
  3820.  
  3821. 871
  3822. 00:49:53,760 --> 00:49:55,090
  3823. FAT BASTARD:
  3824. Come here, you.
  3825.  
  3826. 872
  3827. 00:49:55,890 --> 00:49:58,350
  3828. Ow, my titties!
  3829.  
  3830. 873
  3831. 00:49:58,510 --> 00:50:00,680
  3832. Ow, you gave me a nurple.
  3833.  
  3834. 874
  3835. 00:50:06,310 --> 00:50:08,360
  3836. I’ve got you now, ha-ha-ha.
  3837.  
  3838. 875
  3839. 00:50:09,530 --> 00:50:10,690
  3840. Come here, you.
  3841.  
  3842. 876
  3843. 00:50:17,200 --> 00:50:20,700
  3844. Prepare for the ultimate
  3845. wire-fighting maneuver.
  3846.  
  3847. 877
  3848. 00:50:20,870 --> 00:50:21,950
  3849. [FAT BASTARD CHUCKLES]
  3850.  
  3851. 878
  3852. 00:50:22,120 --> 00:50:25,290
  3853. l just hope my wire-fighting team
  3854. is ready.
  3855.  
  3856. 879
  3857. 00:50:26,830 --> 00:50:28,000
  3858. [YELLS]
  3859.  
  3860. 880
  3861. 00:50:28,170 --> 00:50:30,050
  3862. Whoa!
  3863.  
  3864. 881
  3865. 00:50:30,210 --> 00:50:31,300
  3866. [ALL YELL]
  3867.  
  3868. 882
  3869. 00:50:41,470 --> 00:50:42,680
  3870. [WIRE SNAPS]
  3871.  
  3872. 883
  3873. 00:50:45,310 --> 00:50:47,480
  3874. -Crikey.
  3875. -Oh, great.
  3876.  
  3877. 884
  3878. 00:50:47,650 --> 00:50:49,480
  3879. Isn’t this magical?
  3880.  
  3881. 885
  3882. 00:50:49,650 --> 00:50:51,360
  3883. One of my wires broke.
  3884.  
  3885. 886
  3886. 00:50:54,200 --> 00:50:56,070
  3887. [FAT BASTARD GRUNTS THEN MOANS]
  3888.  
  3889. 887
  3890. 00:50:59,030 --> 00:51:00,530
  3891. You under arrest, sugar.
  3892.  
  3893. 888
  3894. 00:51:03,040 --> 00:51:06,080
  3895. Okay, Fat Bastard, who's the Japanese cat
  3896. you made an exchange with?
  3897.  
  3898. 889
  3899. 00:51:06,250 --> 00:51:08,420
  3900. Oh, all right.
  3901.  
  3902. 890
  3903. 00:51:08,830 --> 00:51:11,040
  3904. His name is Roboto.
  3905.  
  3906. 891
  3907. 00:51:11,210 --> 00:51:13,340
  3908. He owns Roboto Industries.
  3909.  
  3910. 892
  3911. 00:51:13,510 --> 00:51:18,180
  3912. He's designing some contraption
  3913. for Dr. Evil. l don't know.
  3914.  
  3915. 893
  3916. 00:51:18,340 --> 00:51:19,930
  3917. [IN UNISON]
  3918. The tractor beam.
  3919.  
  3920. 894
  3921. 00:51:20,100 --> 00:51:21,350
  3922. -That's it.
  3923. AUSTIN: Listen...
  3924.  
  3925. 895
  3926. 00:51:21,510 --> 00:51:24,520
  3927. ...do you honestly think
  3928. that crime can pay?
  3929.  
  3930. 896
  3931. 00:51:24,680 --> 00:51:27,600
  3932. Well, to be honest with you,
  3933. I’ve been trying to go legit.
  3934.  
  3935. 897
  3936. 00:51:28,270 --> 00:51:31,400
  3937. l really take my sumo wrestling
  3938. seriously, you know.
  3939.  
  3940. 898
  3941. 00:51:32,780 --> 00:51:35,820
  3942. But when you're an overweight child...
  3943.  
  3944. 899
  3945. 00:51:35,990 --> 00:51:39,660
  3946. ...in a society that demands perfection...
  3947.  
  3948. 900
  3949. 00:51:40,490 --> 00:51:42,950
  3950. ...well, your sense of right, wrong...
  3951.  
  3952. 901
  3953. 00:51:43,120 --> 00:51:45,660
  3954. ...fair and unfair...
  3955.  
  3956. 902
  3957. 00:51:46,960 --> 00:51:50,460
  3958. ...will always be tragically skewed.
  3959.  
  3960. 903
  3961. 00:51:51,750 --> 00:51:54,090
  3962. [FARTS]
  3963.  
  3964. 904
  3965. 00:51:55,460 --> 00:51:57,800
  3966. Did you just soil yourself?
  3967.  
  3968. 905
  3969. 00:51:57,970 --> 00:52:00,430
  3970. Maybe, heh-heh-heh.
  3971.  
  3972. 906
  3973. 00:52:00,590 --> 00:52:03,300
  3974. It did sound a little wet, didn't it?
  3975. Right at the end.
  3976.  
  3977. 907
  3978. 00:52:03,470 --> 00:52:04,720
  3979. Ooh. Ha-ha-ha.
  3980.  
  3981. 908
  3982. 00:52:04,890 --> 00:52:06,270
  3983. Let's have a smell, all right?
  3984.  
  3985. 909
  3986. 00:52:06,430 --> 00:52:07,480
  3987. [GUN COCKS]
  3988.  
  3989. 910
  3990. 00:52:07,640 --> 00:52:08,980
  3991. Ooh, wafting, wafting.
  3992.  
  3993. 911
  3994. 00:52:09,150 --> 00:52:12,730
  3995. Oh, everyone likes their own brand,
  3996. don't they? This is magic.
  3997.  
  3998. 912
  3999. 00:52:12,900 --> 00:52:14,610
  4000. All right, analysis:
  4001.  
  4002. 913
  4003. 00:52:14,780 --> 00:52:17,820
  4004. Oh, it smells Like carrots and throw-up.
  4005.  
  4006. 914
  4007. 00:52:17,990 --> 00:52:19,990
  4008. Oh, that could gag a maggot.
  4009.  
  4010. 915
  4011. 00:52:20,160 --> 00:52:24,660
  4012. l smell Like hot, sick ass
  4013. in a dead carcass.
  4014.  
  4015. 916
  4016. 00:52:25,370 --> 00:52:28,960
  4017. Oh, even stink would say that stinks.
  4018.  
  4019. 917
  4020. 00:52:29,120 --> 00:52:31,330
  4021. You know when you go
  4022. into an apartment building...
  4023.  
  4024. 918
  4025. 00:52:31,500 --> 00:52:34,170
  4026. ...and you smell other people's cooking
  4027. on each floor and you go:
  4028.  
  4029. 919
  4030. 00:52:34,340 --> 00:52:37,590
  4031. "What are they cooking?" That, plus crap.
  4032.  
  4033. 920
  4034. 00:52:45,390 --> 00:52:47,270
  4035. -Hey, Pop.
  4036. -Hey, Scotty.
  4037.  
  4038. 921
  4039. 00:52:47,430 --> 00:52:49,020
  4040. How you been, sport?
  4041.  
  4042. 922
  4043. 00:52:49,190 --> 00:52:50,690
  4044. Whoa!
  4045.  
  4046. 923
  4047. 00:52:50,850 --> 00:52:52,150
  4048. l got you a present.
  4049.  
  4050. 924
  4051. 00:52:52,310 --> 00:52:53,650
  4052. Really?
  4053.  
  4054. 925
  4055. 00:52:53,810 --> 00:52:56,190
  4056. -Open the tank.
  4057. -[SHRIEKS] Open the tank!
  4058.  
  4059. 926
  4060. 00:53:02,820 --> 00:53:06,530
  4061. Are those sharks with laser beams
  4062. attached to their heads?
  4063.  
  4064. 927
  4065. 00:53:08,750 --> 00:53:10,370
  4066. [GRUNTS THEN YELLS]
  4067.  
  4068. 928
  4069. 00:53:11,120 --> 00:53:13,750
  4070. Cool. You mean l actually have
  4071. fricking sharks...
  4072.  
  4073. 929
  4074. 00:53:13,920 --> 00:53:17,380
  4075. ...with fricking Laser beams
  4076. attached to their fricking heads?
  4077.  
  4078. 930
  4079. 00:53:18,010 --> 00:53:21,170
  4080. You're the best evil son
  4081. an evil dad could ever ask for.
  4082.  
  4083. 931
  4084. 00:53:23,590 --> 00:53:24,640
  4085. Well, l love you, Dad.
  4086.  
  4087. 932
  4088. 00:53:24,800 --> 00:53:26,470
  4089. [GRUNTS]
  4090.  
  4091. 933
  4092. 00:53:28,220 --> 00:53:29,470
  4093. l love you, son.
  4094.  
  4095. 934
  4096. 00:53:29,640 --> 00:53:31,060
  4097. [GASPS]
  4098.  
  4099. 935
  4100. 00:53:31,230 --> 00:53:32,440
  4101. It’s touching moment, yes.
  4102.  
  4103. 936
  4104. 00:53:32,600 --> 00:53:35,020
  4105. Scotty, come here.
  4106.  
  4107. 937
  4108. 00:53:35,980 --> 00:53:38,150
  4109. Pop a squat right next to Daddy.
  4110.  
  4111. 938
  4112. 00:53:40,740 --> 00:53:41,950
  4113. Mini Me?
  4114.  
  4115. 939
  4116. 00:53:42,490 --> 00:53:44,490
  4117. Move down the bench.
  4118.  
  4119. 940
  4120. 00:53:45,990 --> 00:53:47,410
  4121. [WHISPERS]
  4122. Move down the bench.
  4123.  
  4124. 941
  4125. 00:53:47,580 --> 00:53:48,990
  4126. There's a power struggle, yes.
  4127.  
  4128. 942
  4129. 00:53:54,420 --> 00:53:56,750
  4130. Scotty's on fire.
  4131.  
  4132. 943
  4133. 00:53:56,920 --> 00:53:58,420
  4134. [GROWLS]
  4135.  
  4136. 944
  4137. 00:53:58,590 --> 00:54:00,380
  4138. All right, it's getting crowded in here.
  4139.  
  4140. 945
  4141. 00:54:00,550 --> 00:54:02,760
  4142. Everyone out, everyone out. Come on.
  4143.  
  4144. 946
  4145. 00:54:02,930 --> 00:54:05,050
  4146. Not you, Scotty. Not you, Number Two.
  4147.  
  4148. 947
  4149. 00:54:05,220 --> 00:54:06,890
  4150. Not you, Frau. Not you, Goldmember.
  4151.  
  4152. 948
  4153. 00:54:07,050 --> 00:54:08,390
  4154. Not you, guys back there.
  4155.  
  4156. 949
  4157. 00:54:08,560 --> 00:54:10,600
  4158. Not you, Henchman Holding Wrench.
  4159.  
  4160. 950
  4161. 00:54:10,770 --> 00:54:12,770
  4162. Not you,
  4163. Henchman Arbitrarily Turning Knobs...
  4164.  
  4165. 951
  4166. 00:54:12,940 --> 00:54:14,940
  4167. ...Making It Seem Like
  4168. You're Doing Something.
  4169.  
  4170. 952
  4171. 00:54:27,120 --> 00:54:29,950
  4172. Oh, this is uncomfortable.
  4173.  
  4174. 953
  4175. 00:54:30,120 --> 00:54:32,790
  4176. Heh, heh. The tiny one can't take a hint.
  4177. Heh-heh-heh.
  4178.  
  4179. 954
  4180. 00:54:33,910 --> 00:54:36,460
  4181. He doesn't understand.
  4182. He is small, heh, heh.
  4183.  
  4184. 955
  4185. 00:54:44,010 --> 00:54:45,340
  4186. [WHIMPERS]
  4187.  
  4188. 956
  4189. 00:54:51,270 --> 00:54:52,350
  4190. [GASPS]
  4191.  
  4192. 957
  4193. 00:54:52,640 --> 00:54:53,890
  4194. [PHONE RINGS]
  4195.  
  4196. 958
  4197. 00:54:54,060 --> 00:54:56,270
  4198. Hello, Foxxy. Austin.
  4199.  
  4200. 959
  4201. 00:54:56,440 --> 00:54:59,940
  4202. We've confirmed what Fat Bastard told you
  4203. about Roboto is accurate.
  4204.  
  4205. 960
  4206. 00:55:00,110 --> 00:55:03,480
  4207. He was hired by Dr. Evil
  4208. to construct Preparation H.
  4209.  
  4210. 961
  4211. 00:55:03,650 --> 00:55:07,740
  4212. So Roboto had the technology
  4213. to build Goldmember's tractor beam.
  4214.  
  4215. 962
  4216. 00:55:07,910 --> 00:55:09,780
  4217. Which means Roboto
  4218. will lead us to Goldmember.
  4219.  
  4220. 963
  4221. 00:55:09,950 --> 00:55:13,040
  4222. Which means Goldmember
  4223. will lead us to my father.
  4224.  
  4225. 964
  4226. 00:55:18,670 --> 00:55:20,670
  4227. [IN JAPANESE]
  4228.  
  4229. 965
  4230. 00:55:25,420 --> 00:55:28,510
  4231. Domo arigato, Mr. Roboto. I thank you.
  4232.  
  4233. 966
  4234. 00:55:29,350 --> 00:55:31,350
  4235. [IN JAPANESE]
  4236.  
  4237. 967
  4238. 00:55:34,020 --> 00:55:36,100
  4239. -You speak Japanese?
  4240. -A little.
  4241.  
  4242. 968
  4243. 00:55:36,270 --> 00:55:38,940
  4244. Well, you might be a cunning linguist,
  4245. but I’m a master debater.
  4246.  
  4247. 969
  4248. 00:55:39,100 --> 00:55:41,110
  4249. [BOTH LAUGH]
  4250.  
  4251. 970
  4252. 00:55:42,690 --> 00:55:44,940
  4253. I’m looking for my father.
  4254. He was kidnapped.
  4255.  
  4256. 971
  4257. 00:55:50,280 --> 00:55:51,990
  4258. Please eat what?
  4259.  
  4260. 972
  4261. 00:55:52,410 --> 00:55:53,740
  4262. FOXXY:
  4263. Wait.
  4264.  
  4265. 973
  4266. 00:55:54,660 --> 00:55:58,370
  4267. He said,
  4268. "Please eat some shitake mushrooms."
  4269.  
  4270. 974
  4271. 00:55:58,540 --> 00:56:00,330
  4272. Tell me...
  4273.  
  4274. 975
  4275. 00:56:00,500 --> 00:56:01,960
  4276. ...what do you know...
  4277.  
  4278. 976
  4279. 00:56:02,130 --> 00:56:05,710
  4280. ...about my father's where...
  4281.  
  4282. 977
  4283. 00:56:06,880 --> 00:56:10,180
  4284. ...abouts?
  4285.  
  4286. 978
  4287. 00:56:10,340 --> 00:56:11,680
  4288. Mm.
  4289.  
  4290. 979
  4291. 00:56:15,470 --> 00:56:17,730
  4292. "Your ass is happy"?
  4293.  
  4294. 980
  4295. 00:56:17,890 --> 00:56:19,230
  4296. No.
  4297.  
  4298. 981
  4299. 00:56:21,480 --> 00:56:24,820
  4300. He said,
  4301. "Your assignment is an unhappy one."
  4302.  
  4303. 982
  4304. 00:56:24,980 --> 00:56:26,280
  4305. Oh.
  4306.  
  4307. 983
  4308. 00:56:27,950 --> 00:56:28,990
  4309. [GASPS]
  4310.  
  4311. 984
  4312. 00:56:29,150 --> 00:56:31,740
  4313. Nice potty mouth, dirtbag.
  4314.  
  4315. 985
  4316. 00:56:33,740 --> 00:56:34,870
  4317. Oh.
  4318.  
  4319. 986
  4320. 00:56:37,080 --> 00:56:39,830
  4321. Yes, quite off topic,
  4322. thank you very much.
  4323.  
  4324. 987
  4325. 00:56:40,670 --> 00:56:42,880
  4326. [IN ENGLISH]
  4327. Why don't I just speak in English?
  4328.  
  4329. 988
  4330. 00:56:44,090 --> 00:56:46,090
  4331. That would be a good idea,
  4332. now, wouldn't it?
  4333.  
  4334. 989
  4335. 00:56:46,260 --> 00:56:48,260
  4336. That way l wouldn't
  4337. misread the subtitles...
  4338.  
  4339. 990
  4340. 00:56:48,420 --> 00:56:51,590
  4341. ...making it seem like
  4342. you're saying things that are dirty.
  4343.  
  4344. 991
  4345. 00:56:51,760 --> 00:56:54,930
  4346. I’m sorry to hear about your father,
  4347. but l can't help you.
  4348.  
  4349. 992
  4350. 00:56:56,770 --> 00:56:59,100
  4351. Please excuse me.
  4352. l have another appointment.
  4353.  
  4354. 993
  4355. 00:57:05,110 --> 00:57:06,320
  4356. By the way...
  4357.  
  4358. 994
  4359. 00:57:06,480 --> 00:57:08,480
  4360. [IN JAPANESE]
  4361.  
  4362. 995
  4363. 00:57:11,700 --> 00:57:15,030
  4364. -Mr. Roboto is lying to us.
  4365. -Tell me something l don't know.
  4366.  
  4367. 996
  4368. 00:57:15,200 --> 00:57:17,450
  4369. -l open-mouth kissed a horse once.
  4370. -Say what?
  4371.  
  4372. 997
  4373. 00:57:17,620 --> 00:57:19,040
  4374. That's something you don't know.
  4375.  
  4376. 998
  4377. 00:57:19,200 --> 00:57:22,120
  4378. My spider sense is telling me
  4379. that my father's still in this building.
  4380.  
  4381. 999
  4382. 00:57:22,290 --> 00:57:25,630
  4383. You keep a lookout.
  4384. I’m gonna try and sneak in.
  4385.  
  4386. 1000
  4387. 00:57:26,960 --> 00:57:28,460
  4388. [PHONE RINGS]
  4389.  
  4390. 1001
  4391. 00:57:30,470 --> 00:57:35,640
  4392. [IN JAPANESE]
  4393.  
  4394. 1002
  4395. 00:57:40,560 --> 00:57:41,890
  4396. [PHONE RINGS]
  4397.  
  4398. 1003
  4399. 00:57:42,560 --> 00:57:44,480
  4400. [GUARD SPEAKING IN JAPANESE]
  4401.  
  4402. 1004
  4403. 00:57:49,030 --> 00:57:50,110
  4404. [PANTS UNZIPS]
  4405.  
  4406. 1005
  4407. 00:57:53,820 --> 00:57:56,410
  4408. [SPEAKING IN JAPANESE]
  4409.  
  4410. 1006
  4411. 00:57:56,580 --> 00:57:57,830
  4412. [MOANS]
  4413.  
  4414. 1007
  4415. 00:58:04,120 --> 00:58:10,000
  4416. [GRUNTS]
  4417.  
  4418. 1008
  4419. 00:58:14,840 --> 00:58:16,840
  4420. [GRUNTING]
  4421.  
  4422. 1009
  4423. 00:58:29,820 --> 00:58:31,820
  4424. AUSTIN:
  4425. Mm.
  4426.  
  4427. 1010
  4428. 00:58:31,990 --> 00:58:43,960
  4429. [GUARD SPEAKING IN JAPANESE]
  4430.  
  4431. 1011
  4432. 00:58:45,830 --> 00:58:47,380
  4433. [GRUNTS]
  4434.  
  4435. 1012
  4436. 00:58:48,500 --> 00:58:49,750
  4437. Come on, come on, come on.
  4438.  
  4439. 1013
  4440. 00:58:55,380 --> 00:58:56,720
  4441. [CHUCKLES]
  4442.  
  4443. 1014
  4444. 00:58:58,720 --> 00:59:00,560
  4445. [GASPS THEN YELLS]
  4446.  
  4447. 1015
  4448. 00:59:01,810 --> 00:59:03,520
  4449. [AUSTIN CHOKING
  4450. AND GUARD CHUCKLING]
  4451.  
  4452. 1016
  4453. 00:59:03,680 --> 00:59:05,350
  4454. [GUARD GROWLING]
  4455.  
  4456. 1017
  4457. 00:59:06,980 --> 00:59:08,560
  4458. [BOTH GRUNTING]
  4459.  
  4460. 1018
  4461. 00:59:08,730 --> 00:59:09,900
  4462. Judo chop!
  4463.  
  4464. 1019
  4465. 00:59:10,070 --> 00:59:12,070
  4466. [AUSTIN PANTING]
  4467.  
  4468. 1020
  4469. 00:59:36,010 --> 00:59:37,930
  4470. Shazam!
  4471.  
  4472. 1021
  4473. 00:59:38,090 --> 00:59:39,430
  4474. Come on, sugar.
  4475.  
  4476. 1022
  4477. 00:59:44,470 --> 00:59:47,270
  4478. -There's Goldmember and Roboto.
  4479. GOLDMEMBER: Yes, very impressive.
  4480.  
  4481. 1023
  4482. 00:59:47,440 --> 00:59:50,100
  4483. Put Preparation H
  4484. into my schtuppen transporten.
  4485.  
  4486. 1024
  4487. 00:59:53,400 --> 00:59:56,400
  4488. -What's this?
  4489. -You need this to turn on the tractor beam.
  4490.  
  4491. 1025
  4492. 00:59:56,570 --> 00:59:58,280
  4493. It’s a gold key.
  4494.  
  4495. 1026
  4496. 00:59:58,450 --> 00:59:59,860
  4497. It’s gold.
  4498.  
  4499. 1027
  4500. 01:00:00,820 --> 01:00:02,160
  4501. Smarty-pants.
  4502.  
  4503. 1028
  4504. 01:00:02,330 --> 01:00:04,450
  4505. -Let's spread out.
  4506. -Yeah.
  4507.  
  4508. 1029
  4509. 01:00:08,870 --> 01:00:11,330
  4510. Hands up, Goldmember.
  4511. It’s payback time.
  4512.  
  4513. 1030
  4514. 01:00:11,500 --> 01:00:12,540
  4515. [LAUGHS]
  4516.  
  4517. 1031
  4518. 01:00:12,710 --> 01:00:14,130
  4519. GOLDMEMBER:
  4520. Sure, you can kill me...
  4521.  
  4522. 1032
  4523. 01:00:14,300 --> 01:00:18,050
  4524. ...but then what happens
  4525. to Austin Powers' father?
  4526.  
  4527. 1033
  4528. 01:00:19,050 --> 01:00:20,470
  4529. [BEEPS]
  4530.  
  4531. 1034
  4532. 01:00:20,640 --> 01:00:22,930
  4533. [MUFFLED SCREAMING]
  4534.  
  4535. 1035
  4536. 01:00:26,640 --> 01:00:27,850
  4537. -Dad.
  4538. -Yes.
  4539.  
  4540. 1036
  4541. 01:00:28,020 --> 01:00:31,310
  4542. And now he's going to have
  4543. an unfortunate smelting accident.
  4544.  
  4545. 1037
  4546. 01:00:38,490 --> 01:00:40,320
  4547. -Hiya!
  4548. -Unh!
  4549.  
  4550. 1038
  4551. 01:00:40,490 --> 01:00:43,070
  4552. Don't worry, Dad. I’m here to rescue you.
  4553.  
  4554. 1039
  4555. 01:00:43,240 --> 01:00:47,580
  4556. Ow! May l point out that last time around,
  4557. you fell into an obvious trap.
  4558.  
  4559. 1040
  4560. 01:00:47,750 --> 01:00:50,160
  4561. Now you're trying to save me
  4562. instead of stopping Goldmember.
  4563.  
  4564. 1041
  4565. 01:00:50,330 --> 01:00:53,170
  4566. Oh, please. I’m not gonna
  4567. let Goldmember get away.
  4568.  
  4569. 1042
  4570. 01:00:53,340 --> 01:00:55,340
  4571. Austin, Goldmember's getting away.
  4572.  
  4573. 1043
  4574. 01:00:55,500 --> 01:00:56,840
  4575. Ah.
  4576.  
  4577. 1044
  4578. 01:00:57,460 --> 01:00:59,170
  4579. [LAUGHING]
  4580.  
  4581. 1045
  4582. 01:01:01,510 --> 01:01:05,350
  4583. Hello, hello.
  4584. Aren't you going to introduce us, Austin?
  4585.  
  4586. 1046
  4587. 01:01:05,510 --> 01:01:07,810
  4588. -Foxxy, this is--
  4589. -Powers. Nigel Powers.
  4590.  
  4591. 1047
  4592. 01:01:08,930 --> 01:01:12,440
  4593. -Is that Eau de Flores you're wearing?
  4594. -Yes, it is.
  4595.  
  4596. 1048
  4597. 01:01:12,600 --> 01:01:13,980
  4598. That's how a woman should smell.
  4599.  
  4600. 1049
  4601. 01:01:14,150 --> 01:01:16,360
  4602. Especially one as beautiful as you.
  4603.  
  4604. 1050
  4605. 01:01:16,530 --> 01:01:20,440
  4606. My, my. Even in the face of danger,
  4607. you live up to your reputation.
  4608.  
  4609. 1051
  4610. 01:01:20,610 --> 01:01:21,820
  4611. [FOXXY AND NIGEL LAUGH]
  4612.  
  4613. 1052
  4614. 01:01:21,990 --> 01:01:23,200
  4615. [NIGEL GRUNTS]
  4616.  
  4617. 1053
  4618. 01:01:23,370 --> 01:01:24,530
  4619. Get on with it.
  4620.  
  4621. 1054
  4622. 01:01:29,120 --> 01:01:30,710
  4623. NIGEL:
  4624. I’ve got an idea.
  4625.  
  4626. 1055
  4627. 01:01:35,210 --> 01:01:36,880
  4628. Your spy car's a MINI?
  4629.  
  4630. 1056
  4631. 01:01:37,050 --> 01:01:40,050
  4632. It’s not the size, mate,
  4633. it's how you use it.
  4634.  
  4635. 1057
  4636. 01:01:59,530 --> 01:02:00,570
  4637. [SPEAKS IN GERMAN]
  4638.  
  4639. 1058
  4640. 01:02:03,530 --> 01:02:05,320
  4641. l would've found my way off that.
  4642.  
  4643. 1059
  4644. 01:02:05,490 --> 01:02:07,490
  4645. FOXXY: Fellas.
  4646. -What? I saved your life.
  4647.  
  4648. 1060
  4649. 01:02:07,660 --> 01:02:10,200
  4650. -You should've been doing your job.
  4651. -Oh, you're welcome, man.
  4652.  
  4653. 1061
  4654. 01:02:10,370 --> 01:02:12,370
  4655. Shut up and turn around, please!
  4656.  
  4657. 1062
  4658. 01:02:12,540 --> 01:02:13,660
  4659. [BUS HORN HONKING]
  4660.  
  4661. 1063
  4662. 01:02:13,830 --> 01:02:15,540
  4663. [ALL SCREAMING]
  4664.  
  4665. 1064
  4666. 01:02:31,770 --> 01:02:33,770
  4667. [SHOPPERS SCREAMING]
  4668.  
  4669. 1065
  4670. 01:02:40,280 --> 01:02:43,150
  4671. Run! It’s Godzilla!
  4672.  
  4673. 1066
  4674. 01:02:43,320 --> 01:02:46,910
  4675. It looks Like Godzilla, but due to
  4676. international copyright laws, it's not.
  4677.  
  4678. 1067
  4679. 01:02:47,120 --> 01:02:49,450
  4680. Still, we should run Like it is Godzilla!
  4681.  
  4682. 1068
  4683. 01:02:49,620 --> 01:02:50,870
  4684. Though it isn't.
  4685.  
  4686. 1069
  4687. 01:02:51,040 --> 01:02:53,080
  4688. [BOTH SCREAM]
  4689.  
  4690. 1070
  4691. 01:02:56,460 --> 01:02:57,790
  4692. There's Goldmember.
  4693.  
  4694. 1071
  4695. 01:03:04,130 --> 01:03:06,300
  4696. GOLDMEMBER [OVER RADIO]:
  4697. Breaker, breaker, 1-niner.
  4698.  
  4699. 1072
  4700. 01:03:06,470 --> 01:03:08,300
  4701. This is Goldy-Wang. Over.
  4702.  
  4703. 1073
  4704. 01:03:08,470 --> 01:03:09,970
  4705. 10-4, there, Goldy-Wang.
  4706.  
  4707. 1074
  4708. 01:03:10,140 --> 01:03:12,470
  4709. This is Rubber Ducky.
  4710. What's your 10-20? Over.
  4711.  
  4712. 1075
  4713. 01:03:12,640 --> 01:03:16,440
  4714. I’ve got Preparation H in my rear
  4715. and Smokey the Bear in my back door.
  4716.  
  4717. 1076
  4718. 01:03:16,650 --> 01:03:18,900
  4719. We've got us a convoy. Over.
  4720.  
  4721. 1077
  4722. 01:03:19,060 --> 01:03:22,820
  4723. Yee-haw! Copy that, you son of a bitch
  4724. pile of monkey nuts.
  4725.  
  4726. 1078
  4727. 01:03:23,530 --> 01:03:25,860
  4728. GOLDMEMBER [OVER RADIO]:
  4729. Open wide there, Rubber Ducky.
  4730.  
  4731. 1079
  4732. 01:03:26,030 --> 01:03:28,530
  4733. I am entering your mouth now. Over.
  4734.  
  4735. 1080
  4736. 01:03:33,290 --> 01:03:34,620
  4737. [SUBMARINE SIREN BLARING]
  4738.  
  4739. 1081
  4740. 01:03:34,790 --> 01:03:38,500
  4741. AUSTIN: Oh, great. Goldmember got away.
  4742. FOXXY: Now what?
  4743.  
  4744. 1082
  4745. 01:03:38,670 --> 01:03:41,460
  4746. l think it's obvious.
  4747. We should take Dr. Evil's lair by force.
  4748.  
  4749. 1083
  4750. 01:03:41,630 --> 01:03:44,050
  4751. -You can be my backup, son.
  4752. -Backup?
  4753.  
  4754. 1084
  4755. 01:03:44,210 --> 01:03:46,130
  4756. Well, that's fairly condescending.
  4757.  
  4758. 1085
  4759. 01:03:46,300 --> 01:03:48,380
  4760. Do you think Dr. Evil's
  4761. gonna expect an attack?
  4762.  
  4763. 1086
  4764. 01:03:48,550 --> 01:03:50,390
  4765. We should infiltrate his lair.
  4766.  
  4767. 1087
  4768. 01:03:50,550 --> 01:03:53,180
  4769. This ain't my first rodeo, cowboy.
  4770.  
  4771. 1088
  4772. 01:03:53,350 --> 01:03:57,350
  4773. We need commandos, scuba,
  4774. gadgets, for God's sake.
  4775.  
  4776. 1089
  4777. 01:03:57,520 --> 01:03:59,850
  4778. Well, l don't like to use gadgets...
  4779.  
  4780. 1090
  4781. 01:04:00,020 --> 01:04:02,150
  4782. ...outside the bedroom. I thank you.
  4783.  
  4784. 1091
  4785. 01:04:02,320 --> 01:04:04,860
  4786. [BOTH LAUGH]
  4787.  
  4788. 1092
  4789. 01:04:05,030 --> 01:04:06,110
  4790. Outside the bedroom.
  4791.  
  4792. 1093
  4793. 01:04:06,280 --> 01:04:09,700
  4794. You know, l think being frozen
  4795. damaged your brain.
  4796.  
  4797. 1094
  4798. 01:04:10,530 --> 01:04:12,990
  4799. Really? And how would you know?
  4800.  
  4801. 1095
  4802. 01:04:13,160 --> 01:04:16,830
  4803. This is the most time
  4804. that we've ever spent together since...
  4805.  
  4806. 1096
  4807. 01:04:17,330 --> 01:04:18,370
  4808. ...ever.
  4809.  
  4810. 1097
  4811. 01:04:18,540 --> 01:04:20,620
  4812. -What are you saying, son?
  4813. -Oh, please.
  4814.  
  4815. 1098
  4816. 01:04:20,790 --> 01:04:23,710
  4817. What boy learned to drive a car
  4818. with machine guns on it?
  4819.  
  4820. 1099
  4821. 01:04:23,880 --> 01:04:26,880
  4822. Or had a helicopter
  4823. you can fit in a knapsack?
  4824.  
  4825. 1100
  4826. 01:04:27,050 --> 01:04:29,050
  4827. What about your Swedish nanny, Helga?
  4828.  
  4829. 1101
  4830. 01:04:29,220 --> 01:04:30,340
  4831. [PURRS]
  4832.  
  4833. 1102
  4834. 01:04:30,510 --> 01:04:31,550
  4835. Oh, yes. Helga.
  4836.  
  4837. 1103
  4838. 01:04:31,720 --> 01:04:33,550
  4839. Let's say I didn't hire her for the cooking.
  4840.  
  4841. 1104
  4842. 01:04:33,720 --> 01:04:35,310
  4843. -Ha-ha-ha.
  4844. -Ha-ha-ha. Oh, yes.
  4845.  
  4846. 1105
  4847. 01:04:35,470 --> 01:04:37,140
  4848. She stayed on until you were 24.
  4849.  
  4850. 1106
  4851. 01:04:39,060 --> 01:04:40,640
  4852. We were mates, you and l.
  4853.  
  4854. 1107
  4855. 01:04:40,810 --> 01:04:44,020
  4856. l didn't need a friend, I needed a father.
  4857.  
  4858. 1108
  4859. 01:04:44,900 --> 01:04:47,070
  4860. Do you know l risked my life
  4861. trying to save you...
  4862.  
  4863. 1109
  4864. 01:04:47,240 --> 01:04:49,700
  4865. ...and you still don't give me any respect.
  4866.  
  4867. 1110
  4868. 01:04:49,860 --> 01:04:54,160
  4869. Respect? Oh, come on.
  4870. lf you've got an issue, here’s a tissue.
  4871.  
  4872. 1111
  4873. 01:04:54,330 --> 01:04:56,330
  4874. [NIGEL AND FOXXY LAUGH]
  4875.  
  4876. 1112
  4877. 01:05:02,000 --> 01:05:05,340
  4878. That is not funny.
  4879.  
  4880. 1113
  4881. 01:05:06,250 --> 01:05:08,760
  4882. Well, l suppose we better go
  4883. our separate ways, then.
  4884.  
  4885. 1114
  4886. 01:05:10,630 --> 01:05:16,560
  4887. Fine.
  4888.  
  4889. 1115
  4890. 01:05:27,440 --> 01:05:30,900
  4891. So I've been assigned to welcome you
  4892. to the Ministry of Defence.
  4893.  
  4894. 1116
  4895. 01:05:31,070 --> 01:05:34,530
  4896. l have a letter from my director
  4897. personally thanking you for switching sides.
  4898.  
  4899. 1117
  4900. 01:05:42,830 --> 01:05:45,080
  4901. l can't wait to inform Austin
  4902. of your defection.
  4903.  
  4904. 1118
  4905. 01:05:46,630 --> 01:05:49,300
  4906. [PHONE RINGING]
  4907.  
  4908. 1119
  4909. 01:05:49,760 --> 01:05:51,800
  4910. Oh, hello, Basil.
  4911.  
  4912. 1120
  4913. 01:05:51,970 --> 01:05:54,800
  4914. Yes, Austin should be here
  4915. any second. Yes.
  4916.  
  4917. 1121
  4918. 01:05:55,390 --> 01:05:57,810
  4919. Yes, I'm in Austin’s hotel room right now.
  4920. Mm-hm.
  4921.  
  4922. 1122
  4923. 01:06:04,270 --> 01:06:06,310
  4924. -Aah!
  4925. -Oh-- Uh--
  4926.  
  4927. 1123
  4928. 01:06:06,480 --> 01:06:08,480
  4929. -Assassin!
  4930. -Eek!
  4931.  
  4932. 1124
  4933. 01:06:09,480 --> 01:06:10,820
  4934. [GRUNTS]
  4935.  
  4936. 1125
  4937. 01:06:11,150 --> 01:06:13,070
  4938. AUSTIN:
  4939. Try to kill me, will you?
  4940.  
  4941. 1126
  4942. 01:06:16,070 --> 01:06:17,950
  4943. Oh, you want to be friends, huh?
  4944.  
  4945. 1127
  4946. 01:06:19,620 --> 01:06:21,250
  4947. Wait a tick.
  4948.  
  4949. 1128
  4950. 01:06:22,580 --> 01:06:23,910
  4951. Peace?
  4952.  
  4953. 1129
  4954. 01:06:24,080 --> 01:06:25,120
  4955. Oh!
  4956.  
  4957. 1130
  4958. 01:06:25,290 --> 01:06:27,130
  4959. I’m not falling for that again.
  4960.  
  4961. 1131
  4962. 01:06:32,920 --> 01:06:35,300
  4963. [BOTH GRUNTING]
  4964.  
  4965. 1132
  4966. 01:06:36,470 --> 01:06:38,680
  4967. But at least he didn't mention it.
  4968.  
  4969. 1133
  4970. 01:06:38,850 --> 01:06:41,180
  4971. Yes, I realize he can't talk.
  4972.  
  4973. 1134
  4974. 01:06:41,520 --> 01:06:45,350
  4975. Listen, l think Dr. Evil treated him badly
  4976. and that's why he's decided to help us.
  4977.  
  4978. 1135
  4979. 01:06:51,360 --> 01:06:53,610
  4980. AUSTIN:
  4981. Come back here, you little bugger.
  4982.  
  4983. 1136
  4984. 01:06:54,740 --> 01:06:55,860
  4985. Got you.
  4986.  
  4987. 1137
  4988. 01:06:59,160 --> 01:07:01,790
  4989. Oh, yes, I’m sure Austin and Mini
  4990. will get along famously.
  4991.  
  4992. 1138
  4993. 01:07:03,370 --> 01:07:06,460
  4994. No, l guarantee nothing will happen
  4995. to Mini Me on my watch.
  4996.  
  4997. 1139
  4998. 01:07:09,090 --> 01:07:10,540
  4999. [PANTING]
  5000.  
  5001. 1140
  5002. 01:07:10,710 --> 01:07:13,550
  5003. Come on, you bugger.
  5004. Come on, I got you.
  5005.  
  5006. 1141
  5007. 01:07:17,840 --> 01:07:23,220
  5008. Oh, l think he and Austin will be united
  5009. in their commitment to stopping Dr. Evil.
  5010.  
  5011. 1142
  5012. 01:07:27,310 --> 01:07:30,860
  5013. Austin, there you are.
  5014. I’ve come to tell you the good news.
  5015.  
  5016. 1143
  5017. 01:07:34,900 --> 01:07:36,900
  5018. Mini Me has...
  5019.  
  5020. 1144
  5021. 01:07:37,740 --> 01:07:38,740
  5022. ...switched sides.
  5023.  
  5024. 1145
  5025. 01:07:39,410 --> 01:07:42,240
  5026. Ah! Oh. Heh.
  5027.  
  5028. 1146
  5029. 01:07:42,410 --> 01:07:46,870
  5030. Sorry about that, old chap. Sorry.
  5031. You know. Sorry.
  5032.  
  5033. 1147
  5034. 01:07:47,040 --> 01:07:49,500
  5035. Welcome aboard, heh-heh-heh.
  5036.  
  5037. 1148
  5038. 01:07:49,670 --> 01:07:52,170
  5039. -My "mole-stake."
  5040. -What was that?
  5041.  
  5042. 1149
  5043. 01:07:53,210 --> 01:07:56,420
  5044. -Listen, just get it out of your system.
  5045. -No, I’m fine.
  5046.  
  5047. 1150
  5048. 01:07:56,590 --> 01:07:58,590
  5049. -We could work together better if--
  5050. -It’s okay--
  5051.  
  5052. 1151
  5053. 01:07:58,760 --> 01:08:00,470
  5054. Mole! Bloody mole!
  5055.  
  5056. 1152
  5057. 01:08:00,640 --> 01:08:04,770
  5058. We're not supposed to talk about the mole,
  5059. but there's a mole winking me in the face.
  5060.  
  5061. 1153
  5062. 01:08:04,930 --> 01:08:09,190
  5063. I’m gonna chop it off and cut it up
  5064. and make some guacamole.
  5065.  
  5066. 1154
  5067. 01:08:11,270 --> 01:08:13,690
  5068. -Better?
  5069. -Yeah. Yes.
  5070.  
  5071. 1155
  5072. 01:08:21,120 --> 01:08:22,950
  5073. [CHUCKLES]
  5074.  
  5075. 1156
  5076. 01:08:27,870 --> 01:08:31,040
  5077. So you've decided to join us,
  5078. huh, Mini Me?
  5079.  
  5080. 1157
  5081. 01:08:31,210 --> 01:08:33,460
  5082. Welcome to the good side,
  5083. my mini-brother.
  5084.  
  5085. 1158
  5086. 01:08:33,630 --> 01:08:36,630
  5087. And thank you for the map
  5088. of Dr. Evil's sub.
  5089.  
  5090. 1159
  5091. 01:08:38,130 --> 01:08:39,800
  5092. What's this? It says:
  5093.  
  5094. 1160
  5095. 01:08:39,970 --> 01:08:43,430
  5096. "Dr. Evil's tractor beam is now complete.
  5097. There's not much time.
  5098.  
  5099. 1161
  5100. 01:08:43,600 --> 01:08:45,140
  5101. Dr. Evil must pay."
  5102.  
  5103. 1162
  5104. 01:08:49,770 --> 01:08:52,940
  5105. "You are so beautiful.
  5106. Are you a clone of an angel?"
  5107.  
  5108. 1163
  5109. 01:08:53,110 --> 01:08:54,150
  5110. [FOXXY AND AUSTIN LAUGH]
  5111.  
  5112. 1164
  5113. 01:08:54,320 --> 01:08:58,440
  5114. That is so sweet.
  5115. Well, no, my mini-man, I'm not.
  5116.  
  5117. 1165
  5118. 01:09:01,740 --> 01:09:03,990
  5119. "Are you sure you don't have
  5120. a little clone in you?"
  5121.  
  5122. 1166
  5123. 01:09:04,160 --> 01:09:05,160
  5124. [CHUCKLES]
  5125.  
  5126. 1167
  5127. 01:09:05,330 --> 01:09:06,740
  5128. Yeah, I'm sure.
  5129.  
  5130. 1168
  5131. 01:09:06,950 --> 01:09:08,200
  5132. "Would you like to?"
  5133.  
  5134. 1169
  5135. 01:09:08,370 --> 01:09:09,710
  5136. [LAUGHS]
  5137.  
  5138. 1170
  5139. 01:09:11,830 --> 01:09:13,750
  5140. Horny bugger.
  5141.  
  5142. 1171
  5143. 01:09:13,920 --> 01:09:15,960
  5144. That is so not funny.
  5145.  
  5146. 1172
  5147. 01:09:16,920 --> 01:09:18,760
  5148. Okay, everyone, prepare to dive.
  5149.  
  5150. 1173
  5151. 01:09:18,920 --> 01:09:21,430
  5152. This spy car's also a submarine.
  5153.  
  5154. 1174
  5155. 01:09:36,690 --> 01:09:39,190
  5156. Get me the World Organization.
  5157.  
  5158. 1175
  5159. 01:09:41,570 --> 01:09:42,860
  5160. What is it, Dr. Evil?
  5161.  
  5162. 1176
  5163. 01:09:43,030 --> 01:09:44,490
  5164. Gentlemen, in a matter of hours...
  5165.  
  5166. 1177
  5167. 01:09:44,660 --> 01:09:48,540
  5168. ...a meteor will crash into Earth,
  5169. causing a global flood.
  5170.  
  5171. 1178
  5172. 01:09:48,700 --> 01:09:50,830
  5173. That is, of course, unless you pay me...
  5174.  
  5175. 1179
  5176. 01:09:52,540 --> 01:09:54,000
  5177. ...one billion...
  5178.  
  5179. 1180
  5180. 01:09:54,170 --> 01:09:56,500
  5181. [DR. EVIL MUTTERING INDISTINCTLY]
  5182.  
  5183. 1181
  5184. 01:09:59,880 --> 01:10:02,170
  5185. ...million yen.
  5186.  
  5187. 1182
  5188. 01:10:02,340 --> 01:10:04,050
  5189. l think you're bluffing.
  5190.  
  5191. 1183
  5192. 01:10:04,220 --> 01:10:08,220
  5193. Well, perhaps you'd like a demonstration.
  5194. Number Two, the key, please.
  5195.  
  5196. 1184
  5197. 01:10:08,390 --> 01:10:10,390
  5198. [BEEPING]
  5199.  
  5200. 1185
  5201. 01:10:30,160 --> 01:10:32,250
  5202. Sir, Dr. Evil's not bluffing.
  5203.  
  5204. 1186
  5205. 01:10:32,410 --> 01:10:34,410
  5206. One of our satellites is falling out of orbit.
  5207.  
  5208. 1187
  5209. 01:10:34,580 --> 01:10:37,000
  5210. -Which one?
  5211. -It’s the one that looks like a pair of--
  5212.  
  5213. 1188
  5214. 01:10:37,170 --> 01:10:40,420
  5215. Melons. Big, juicy melons.
  5216.  
  5217. 1189
  5218. 01:10:40,590 --> 01:10:42,590
  5219. Are they nice and firm?
  5220.  
  5221. 1190
  5222. 01:10:42,760 --> 01:10:44,590
  5223. Well, what do you think?
  5224.  
  5225. 1191
  5226. 01:10:44,760 --> 01:10:47,510
  5227. Look at that. It looks like a set of giant--
  5228.  
  5229. 1192
  5230. 01:10:47,680 --> 01:10:49,260
  5231. [CHEERING]
  5232.  
  5233. 1193
  5234. 01:10:49,430 --> 01:10:53,270
  5235. -Hey, "A" and "N," you're late.
  5236. -How we doing? We're back.
  5237.  
  5238. 1194
  5239. 01:10:53,430 --> 01:10:55,770
  5240. MEN:
  5241. Go, Titans!
  5242.  
  5243. 1195
  5244. 01:10:55,940 --> 01:10:58,360
  5245. Check it out. Those remind me of--
  5246.  
  5247. 1196
  5248. 01:10:58,520 --> 01:11:00,860
  5249. -Boobs.
  5250. -Boobs, Ozzy?
  5251.  
  5252. 1197
  5253. 01:11:01,030 --> 01:11:05,450
  5254. -These filmmakers are ****ing boobs.
  5255. -What do you mean, Dad?
  5256.  
  5257. 1198
  5258. 01:11:05,610 --> 01:11:10,200
  5259. They're using the same ****ing joke
  5260. as they did in the last Austin Powers movie.
  5261.  
  5262. 1199
  5263. 01:11:10,370 --> 01:11:12,790
  5264. -What ****ing joke?
  5265. -You know, the ****ing joke...
  5266.  
  5267. 1200
  5268. 01:11:12,950 --> 01:11:15,460
  5269. ...about the long smooth rocket
  5270. that looks like some guy's--
  5271.  
  5272. 1201
  5273. 01:11:15,620 --> 01:11:17,460
  5274. -Johnson.
  5275. -Yes, sir.
  5276.  
  5277. 1202
  5278. 01:11:17,630 --> 01:11:21,300
  5279. -Any sign of that satellite?
  5280. -No, sir. It's gone.
  5281.  
  5282. 1203
  5283. 01:11:21,460 --> 01:11:25,010
  5284. Gentlemen, you have my demands.
  5285. Peace out.
  5286.  
  5287. 1204
  5288. 01:11:59,580 --> 01:12:02,290
  5289. Cor, baby. You look very switched on.
  5290.  
  5291. 1205
  5292. 01:12:02,460 --> 01:12:03,500
  5293. [CHUCKLES]
  5294.  
  5295. 1206
  5296. 01:12:03,670 --> 01:12:05,380
  5297. Thank you, Austin.
  5298.  
  5299. 1207
  5300. 01:12:05,550 --> 01:12:06,880
  5301. Uh--
  5302.  
  5303. 1208
  5304. 01:12:08,510 --> 01:12:11,800
  5305. No, Mini Me. Off. Bad. Mustn't.
  5306. No humping.
  5307.  
  5308. 1209
  5309. 01:12:14,180 --> 01:12:17,100
  5310. Dr. Evil, in light of the success
  5311. of the device...
  5312.  
  5313. 1210
  5314. 01:12:17,270 --> 01:12:19,690
  5315. ...it is Japanese custom
  5316. that l receive a bonus.
  5317.  
  5318. 1211
  5319. 01:12:19,850 --> 01:12:20,940
  5320. [GASPS]
  5321.  
  5322. 1212
  5323. 01:12:21,110 --> 01:12:23,860
  5324. A bonus? Ha-ha-ha. That's good.
  5325.  
  5326. 1213
  5327. 01:12:24,030 --> 01:12:25,690
  5328. Yeah, that's awesome.
  5329.  
  5330. 1214
  5331. 01:12:25,860 --> 01:12:28,360
  5332. Throw me a fricking bonus here.
  5333. Ha-ha-ha.
  5334.  
  5335. 1215
  5336. 01:12:28,530 --> 01:12:29,820
  5337. [CLEARS THROAT]
  5338.  
  5339. 1216
  5340. 01:12:31,370 --> 01:12:34,200
  5341. Oh, l haven't laughed that hard
  5342. since l was a little girl. Thank you.
  5343.  
  5344. 1217
  5345. 01:12:34,370 --> 01:12:36,580
  5346. -Hmm.
  5347. -Oh.
  5348.  
  5349. 1218
  5350. 01:12:36,750 --> 01:12:38,040
  5351. You're not joking.
  5352.  
  5353. 1219
  5354. 01:12:38,210 --> 01:12:40,370
  5355. No. In fact,
  5356. if you don't give me the bonus--
  5357.  
  5358. 1220
  5359. 01:12:40,540 --> 01:12:42,670
  5360. SCOTT: Hey, Dad.
  5361. -Hey, Scotty. How are you, sport?
  5362.  
  5363. 1221
  5364. 01:12:42,840 --> 01:12:44,500
  5365. Whoa!
  5366.  
  5367. 1222
  5368. 01:12:50,970 --> 01:12:53,140
  5369. -Why don't you let me take care of this?
  5370. -Okay.
  5371.  
  5372. 1223
  5373. 01:12:53,300 --> 01:12:54,470
  5374. [YELLS]
  5375.  
  5376. 1224
  5377. 01:12:57,180 --> 01:12:59,180
  5378. [BOTH CHUCKLING]
  5379.  
  5380. 1225
  5381. 01:13:00,190 --> 01:13:01,560
  5382. [LAUGHS MANIACALLY]
  5383.  
  5384. 1226
  5385. 01:13:04,230 --> 01:13:05,400
  5386. Ugh.
  5387.  
  5388. 1227
  5389. 01:13:05,570 --> 01:13:07,030
  5390. He's got a good evil laugh.
  5391.  
  5392. 1228
  5393. 01:13:08,530 --> 01:13:09,860
  5394. Get along.
  5395.  
  5396. 1229
  5397. 01:13:10,030 --> 01:13:11,200
  5398. Scotty!
  5399.  
  5400. 1230
  5401. 01:13:11,990 --> 01:13:16,200
  5402. Scotty.
  5403.  
  5404. 1231
  5405. 01:13:16,370 --> 01:13:19,160
  5406. Take it down a notch.
  5407.  
  5408. 1232
  5409. 01:13:20,420 --> 01:13:21,580
  5410. It’s creeping a bit.
  5411.  
  5412. 1233
  5413. 01:13:22,000 --> 01:13:23,670
  5414. AUSTIN:
  5415. Let's go.
  5416.  
  5417. 1234
  5418. 01:13:27,920 --> 01:13:29,380
  5419. We'll need a disguise.
  5420.  
  5421. 1235
  5422. 01:13:30,880 --> 01:13:32,430
  5423. There's only one uniform.
  5424.  
  5425. 1236
  5426. 01:13:33,340 --> 01:13:36,600
  5427. One of us has to go on
  5428. the other one's shoulders.
  5429.  
  5430. 1237
  5431. 01:13:49,280 --> 01:13:52,150
  5432. Hey there, buddy. How's it going?
  5433. Good to see you.
  5434.  
  5435. 1238
  5436. 01:13:52,320 --> 01:13:55,280
  5437. Yeah. Yeah. Hi.
  5438.  
  5439. 1239
  5440. 01:13:56,780 --> 01:13:59,290
  5441. How are you? Just getting my sea legs.
  5442. Sorry about that.
  5443.  
  5444. 1240
  5445. 01:13:59,450 --> 01:14:00,790
  5446. Hello. You all right?
  5447.  
  5448. 1241
  5449. 01:14:00,960 --> 01:14:04,000
  5450. Yes, it's a good hat. Very good hat.
  5451.  
  5452. 1242
  5453. 01:14:05,210 --> 01:14:07,290
  5454. Come on, Mini Me. Let's go.
  5455.  
  5456. 1243
  5457. 01:14:08,300 --> 01:14:10,590
  5458. Hold it right there, mister.
  5459.  
  5460. 1244
  5461. 01:14:13,090 --> 01:14:16,300
  5462. Did you really think
  5463. you could get away with this?
  5464.  
  5465. 1245
  5466. 01:14:16,470 --> 01:14:18,640
  5467. l did, actually. Yes.
  5468.  
  5469. 1246
  5470. 01:14:18,810 --> 01:14:20,890
  5471. Every new recruit must have a physical.
  5472.  
  5473. 1247
  5474. 01:14:21,850 --> 01:14:23,600
  5475. Now get in here, sailor.
  5476.  
  5477. 1248
  5478. 01:14:23,770 --> 01:14:26,860
  5479. I’m going to need a urine sampIe.
  5480.  
  5481. 1249
  5482. 01:14:28,570 --> 01:14:29,820
  5483. Okay.
  5484.  
  5485. 1250
  5486. 01:14:33,990 --> 01:14:35,740
  5487. -[MOUTHS] No.
  5488. -[MOUTHS] I don't know.
  5489.  
  5490. 1251
  5491. 01:14:36,990 --> 01:14:39,990
  5492. Okay, then. Um....
  5493.  
  5494. 1252
  5495. 01:14:44,830 --> 01:14:46,210
  5496. Okay.
  5497.  
  5498. 1253
  5499. 01:14:55,300 --> 01:14:56,590
  5500. Hello.
  5501.  
  5502. 1254
  5503. 01:15:03,060 --> 01:15:05,810
  5504. And here we go.
  5505.  
  5506. 1255
  5507. 01:15:06,310 --> 01:15:07,650
  5508. Sorry.
  5509.  
  5510. 1256
  5511. 01:15:07,810 --> 01:15:10,270
  5512. Right. There you go. Right.
  5513.  
  5514. 1257
  5515. 01:15:10,440 --> 01:15:11,690
  5516. [GRUNTS]
  5517.  
  5518. 1258
  5519. 01:15:11,860 --> 01:15:13,110
  5520. AUSTIN: Ah, yes.
  5521. -Terrific.
  5522.  
  5523. 1259
  5524. 01:15:13,280 --> 01:15:15,360
  5525. Yes, good. Okay.
  5526.  
  5527. 1260
  5528. 01:15:15,530 --> 01:15:19,280
  5529. All right, sailor, go behind that screen...
  5530.  
  5531. 1261
  5532. 01:15:19,490 --> 01:15:21,330
  5533. ...and strip down to your skivvies.
  5534.  
  5535. 1262
  5536. 01:15:21,490 --> 01:15:24,700
  5537. All right, then. I’ll just go to that screen...
  5538.  
  5539. 1263
  5540. 01:15:25,500 --> 01:15:28,420
  5541. ...which is over there.
  5542.  
  5543. 1264
  5544. 01:15:32,130 --> 01:15:33,800
  5545. Right behind that screen.
  5546.  
  5547. 1265
  5548. 01:15:35,130 --> 01:15:36,470
  5549. DOCTOR:
  5550. Next.
  5551.  
  5552. 1266
  5553. 01:15:38,300 --> 01:15:40,390
  5554. AUSTIN:
  5555. Come on, hurry. The map.
  5556.  
  5557. 1267
  5558. 01:15:40,970 --> 01:15:43,060
  5559. Okay, what's our plan?
  5560.  
  5561. 1268
  5562. 01:15:45,390 --> 01:15:47,810
  5563. -I’m going to need a urine sample.
  5564. -Okay.
  5565.  
  5566. 1269
  5567. 01:15:47,980 --> 01:15:49,560
  5568. Which way to the main chamber?
  5569.  
  5570. 1270
  5571. 01:16:08,250 --> 01:16:11,170
  5572. Okay, so.... Oh, sure.
  5573.  
  5574. 1271
  5575. 01:16:13,550 --> 01:16:15,340
  5576. Oh.
  5577.  
  5578. 1272
  5579. 01:16:23,220 --> 01:16:26,520
  5580. -Excuse me, doctor?
  5581. -It’s difficult in public, isn't it?
  5582.  
  5583. 1273
  5584. 01:16:34,780 --> 01:16:37,280
  5585. Mini Me, our shadows.
  5586. We're casting a shadow.
  5587.  
  5588. 1274
  5589. 01:16:37,450 --> 01:16:39,200
  5590. What's wrong, sailor?
  5591.  
  5592. 1275
  5593. 01:16:39,410 --> 01:16:41,570
  5594. You should check that guy out.
  5595.  
  5596. 1276
  5597. 01:16:42,700 --> 01:16:44,700
  5598. [AUSTIN WHISTLING NONCHALANTLY]
  5599.  
  5600. 1277
  5601. 01:16:47,620 --> 01:16:49,040
  5602. What the hell's going on here?
  5603.  
  5604. 1278
  5605. 01:16:52,460 --> 01:16:53,880
  5606. Hands up.
  5607.  
  5608. 1279
  5609. 01:16:55,920 --> 01:16:58,800
  5610. You heard me. l said, hands up.
  5611. Both of you.
  5612.  
  5613. 1280
  5614. 01:17:01,470 --> 01:17:02,550
  5615. [GASPS]
  5616.  
  5617. 1281
  5618. 01:17:04,810 --> 01:17:06,810
  5619. [MINI ME GRUNTS]
  5620.  
  5621. 1282
  5622. 01:17:07,640 --> 01:17:09,140
  5623. Oh.
  5624.  
  5625. 1283
  5626. 01:17:10,310 --> 01:17:11,480
  5627. [GROWLS]
  5628.  
  5629. 1284
  5630. 01:17:11,650 --> 01:17:14,650
  5631. -Come with me.
  5632. -Mini Me, the map. Go.
  5633.  
  5634. 1285
  5635. 01:17:16,980 --> 01:17:19,780
  5636. Okay. You got me.
  5637.  
  5638. 1286
  5639. 01:17:22,200 --> 01:17:24,200
  5640. [MINI ME SCREAMING]
  5641.  
  5642. 1287
  5643. 01:17:31,080 --> 01:17:32,330
  5644. Are you all right, little man?
  5645.  
  5646. 1288
  5647. 01:17:32,500 --> 01:17:34,000
  5648. Uh-huh.
  5649.  
  5650. 1289
  5651. 01:17:36,750 --> 01:17:38,260
  5652. Right on.
  5653.  
  5654. 1290
  5655. 01:17:39,840 --> 01:17:41,800
  5656. ["SOMEWHERE BEYOND THE SEA"
  5657. PLAYING]
  5658.  
  5659. 1291
  5660. 01:17:55,020 --> 01:17:56,610
  5661. Mr. Powers.
  5662.  
  5663. 1292
  5664. 01:17:56,770 --> 01:17:58,360
  5665. Before l kill you...
  5666.  
  5667. 1293
  5668. 01:17:58,530 --> 01:18:01,990
  5669. ...perhaps you'd like to see
  5670. the genius of my plan.
  5671.  
  5672. 1294
  5673. 01:18:04,280 --> 01:18:05,660
  5674. Key, please.
  5675.  
  5676. 1295
  5677. 01:18:09,790 --> 01:18:13,040
  5678. What the--? Who? But how? Where? Huh?
  5679.  
  5680. 1296
  5681. 01:18:13,210 --> 01:18:14,710
  5682. [AUSTIN LAUGHS]
  5683.  
  5684. 1297
  5685. 01:18:15,420 --> 01:18:16,880
  5686. -Looking for this?
  5687. -Huh?
  5688.  
  5689. 1298
  5690. 01:18:19,210 --> 01:18:21,010
  5691. -Mini Me?
  5692. -All right...
  5693.  
  5694. 1299
  5695. 01:18:21,170 --> 01:18:24,930
  5696. ...everybody drop your guns,
  5697. because Foxxy Cleopatra's in the sub.
  5698.  
  5699. 1300
  5700. 01:18:25,090 --> 01:18:28,220
  5701. Smashing, Foxxy. Yeah.
  5702.  
  5703. 1301
  5704. 01:18:30,430 --> 01:18:32,560
  5705. SCOTT: Unh!
  5706. -Here, sugar.
  5707.  
  5708. 1302
  5709. 01:18:33,190 --> 01:18:34,730
  5710. All right, Dr. Evil.
  5711.  
  5712. 1303
  5713. 01:18:34,900 --> 01:18:37,650
  5714. It’s finally come down to this.
  5715.  
  5716. 1304
  5717. 01:18:38,230 --> 01:18:41,860
  5718. You, me and a gun.
  5719.  
  5720. 1305
  5721. 01:18:44,450 --> 01:18:46,530
  5722. NIGEL:
  5723. What are you going to do now, Austin?
  5724.  
  5725. 1306
  5726. 01:18:48,580 --> 01:18:50,200
  5727. Dad?
  5728.  
  5729. 1307
  5730. 01:18:50,540 --> 01:18:52,950
  5731. What are you doing here?
  5732.  
  5733. 1308
  5734. 01:18:53,120 --> 01:18:56,080
  5735. I’ve gotta finish this off once and for all.
  5736.  
  5737. 1309
  5738. 01:18:57,750 --> 01:19:00,300
  5739. I’m afraid you can't do that.
  5740.  
  5741. 1310
  5742. 01:19:00,760 --> 01:19:02,420
  5743. l have to protect my son.
  5744.  
  5745. 1311
  5746. 01:19:02,590 --> 01:19:04,590
  5747. Dad, I’m fine.
  5748.  
  5749. 1312
  5750. 01:19:04,760 --> 01:19:06,930
  5751. I’m not talking about you.
  5752.  
  5753. 1313
  5754. 01:19:07,890 --> 01:19:11,100
  5755. I’m talking about him.
  5756.  
  5757. 1314
  5758. 01:19:13,980 --> 01:19:15,520
  5759. What?
  5760.  
  5761. 1315
  5762. 01:19:15,770 --> 01:19:19,110
  5763. Dr. Evil's not your son, l am.
  5764.  
  5765. 1316
  5766. 01:19:19,570 --> 01:19:21,110
  5767. -You both are.
  5768. -Huh?!
  5769.  
  5770. 1317
  5771. 01:19:23,030 --> 01:19:24,280
  5772. What?
  5773.  
  5774. 1318
  5775. 01:19:25,280 --> 01:19:29,120
  5776. It was our first family holiday together.
  5777.  
  5778. 1319
  5779. 01:19:29,620 --> 01:19:31,620
  5780. NIGEL:
  5781. Just as I was finishing a case...
  5782.  
  5783. 1320
  5784. 01:19:31,790 --> 01:19:34,950
  5785. ...your mother brought the two of you
  5786. to Belgium.
  5787.  
  5788. 1321
  5789. 01:19:37,920 --> 01:19:41,460
  5790. I stopped to have a tinkle when the car....
  5791.  
  5792. 1322
  5793. 01:19:51,810 --> 01:19:56,230
  5794. But my parents died in a car accident.
  5795.  
  5796. 1323
  5797. 01:19:56,390 --> 01:19:58,480
  5798. It was no accident.
  5799.  
  5800. 1324
  5801. 01:19:58,900 --> 01:20:01,270
  5802. NIGEL:
  5803. It was an assassination attempt.
  5804.  
  5805. 1325
  5806. 01:20:01,440 --> 01:20:03,860
  5807. I thought only Austin survived.
  5808.  
  5809. 1326
  5810. 01:20:04,030 --> 01:20:06,320
  5811. I should have told you the truth earlier...
  5812.  
  5813. 1327
  5814. 01:20:06,490 --> 01:20:09,320
  5815. ...but those Belgians,
  5816. they made you so damn...
  5817.  
  5818. 1328
  5819. 01:20:09,490 --> 01:20:10,780
  5820. ...evil.
  5821.  
  5822. 1329
  5823. 01:20:11,580 --> 01:20:15,250
  5824. And, of course, they share a border
  5825. with the Dutch.
  5826.  
  5827. 1330
  5828. 01:20:16,500 --> 01:20:20,170
  5829. Very interesting story, Mr. Powers.
  5830.  
  5831. 1331
  5832. 01:20:20,330 --> 01:20:23,630
  5833. Of course, I’m gonna have to wait
  5834. until l see all the facts.
  5835.  
  5836. 1332
  5837. 01:20:23,800 --> 01:20:25,420
  5838. Daddy.
  5839.  
  5840. 1333
  5841. 01:20:25,590 --> 01:20:26,840
  5842. [SOBBING]
  5843.  
  5844. 1334
  5845. 01:20:27,510 --> 01:20:29,510
  5846. Shh, Daddy's here, Dougie.
  5847.  
  5848. 1335
  5849. 01:20:29,680 --> 01:20:31,680
  5850. -Shh.
  5851. -Uh, "Dougie"?
  5852.  
  5853. 1336
  5854. 01:20:31,850 --> 01:20:33,760
  5855. -Dougie?
  5856. -Dougie. Remember, Dougie?
  5857.  
  5858. 1337
  5859. 01:20:33,930 --> 01:20:36,100
  5860. Dad, what's going on?
  5861.  
  5862. 1338
  5863. 01:20:39,850 --> 01:20:41,690
  5864. What are you going to do, Austin?
  5865.  
  5866. 1339
  5867. 01:20:55,200 --> 01:20:56,830
  5868. -Austin.
  5869. -Hmm?
  5870.  
  5871. 1340
  5872. 01:20:57,000 --> 01:20:58,830
  5873. Are you sure you can trust Dr. Evil?
  5874.  
  5875. 1341
  5876. 01:21:01,130 --> 01:21:03,040
  5877. He ain't heavy...
  5878.  
  5879. 1342
  5880. 01:21:03,380 --> 01:21:05,550
  5881. ...he's my brother, baby. Yeah.
  5882.  
  5883. 1343
  5884. 01:21:08,550 --> 01:21:11,630
  5885. l should have told you this
  5886. so long ago, son.
  5887.  
  5888. 1344
  5889. 01:21:12,510 --> 01:21:14,010
  5890. -I’m very proud of you.
  5891. -Unh!
  5892.  
  5893. 1345
  5894. 01:21:15,890 --> 01:21:19,520
  5895. -Can you forgive me?
  5896. -l forgive you, Dad.
  5897.  
  5898. 1346
  5899. 01:21:24,520 --> 01:21:26,190
  5900. [LAUGHING]
  5901.  
  5902. 1347
  5903. 01:21:26,360 --> 01:21:27,400
  5904. Come on.
  5905.  
  5906. 1348
  5907. 01:21:29,900 --> 01:21:31,240
  5908. Yes.
  5909.  
  5910. 1349
  5911. 01:21:34,620 --> 01:21:37,620
  5912. [SOBBING AND LAUGHING]
  5913.  
  5914. 1350
  5915. 01:21:40,750 --> 01:21:42,920
  5916. NIGEL:
  5917. My two sons.
  5918.  
  5919. 1351
  5920. 01:21:43,500 --> 01:21:47,090
  5921. I’m Dougie. I’m Dougie.
  5922.  
  5923. 1352
  5924. 01:21:50,380 --> 01:21:52,050
  5925. NIGEL:
  5926. Come on.
  5927.  
  5928. 1353
  5929. 01:21:53,090 --> 01:21:55,260
  5930. Oh, there you are.
  5931.  
  5932. 1354
  5933. 01:21:59,850 --> 01:22:01,350
  5934. Oh, come on.
  5935.  
  5936. 1355
  5937. 01:22:02,440 --> 01:22:05,060
  5938. l mean, first I’m not evil enough for you.
  5939.  
  5940. 1356
  5941. 01:22:05,230 --> 01:22:07,440
  5942. And now you're gonna turn good?
  5943.  
  5944. 1357
  5945. 01:22:07,610 --> 01:22:09,070
  5946. Listen, Scott.
  5947.  
  5948. 1358
  5949. 01:22:09,240 --> 01:22:10,860
  5950. You can spend your whole life...
  5951.  
  5952. 1359
  5953. 01:22:11,030 --> 01:22:14,070
  5954. ...trying to win your parents' acceptance,
  5955. believe me.
  5956.  
  5957. 1360
  5958. 01:22:15,030 --> 01:22:18,620
  5959. But at the end of the day,
  5960. you've just gotta do it for yourself, baby.
  5961.  
  5962. 1361
  5963. 01:22:18,790 --> 01:22:20,120
  5964. [MOCKING]
  5965. That all I’ve gotta do?
  5966.  
  5967. 1362
  5968. 01:22:20,290 --> 01:22:21,450
  5969. Hey, Austin? Shh!
  5970.  
  5971. 1363
  5972. 01:22:22,290 --> 01:22:23,580
  5973. What?
  5974.  
  5975. 1364
  5976. 01:22:23,960 --> 01:22:25,420
  5977. l hate you.
  5978.  
  5979. 1365
  5980. 01:22:26,290 --> 01:22:28,630
  5981. l hate you. I hate you.
  5982.  
  5983. 1366
  5984. 01:22:29,880 --> 01:22:32,920
  5985. l don't even know you,
  5986. but l hate you too.
  5987.  
  5988. 1367
  5989. 01:22:33,090 --> 01:22:34,760
  5990. And l especially hate you.
  5991.  
  5992. 1368
  5993. 01:22:37,810 --> 01:22:39,010
  5994. You'll pay.
  5995.  
  5996. 1369
  5997. 01:22:39,640 --> 01:22:41,100
  5998. You'll all pay.
  5999.  
  6000. 1370
  6001. 01:22:45,230 --> 01:22:49,360
  6002. I'd like to point out that no one else
  6003. in my gene pool runs like a girl.
  6004.  
  6005. 1371
  6006. 01:22:49,530 --> 01:22:51,320
  6007. Not so fast, smarty-pants.
  6008.  
  6009. 1372
  6010. 01:22:52,820 --> 01:22:54,150
  6011. Dr. Evil...
  6012.  
  6013. 1373
  6014. 01:22:54,320 --> 01:22:59,450
  6015. ...you might not want to destroy the world,
  6016. but l do.
  6017.  
  6018. 1374
  6019. 01:23:00,620 --> 01:23:03,410
  6020. Preparation H goes ahead as planned.
  6021.  
  6022. 1375
  6023. 01:23:03,580 --> 01:23:05,250
  6024. I’m going to flood the Earth.
  6025.  
  6026. 1376
  6027. 01:23:06,580 --> 01:23:07,750
  6028. Think again, Goldmember.
  6029.  
  6030. 1377
  6031. 01:23:08,340 --> 01:23:10,670
  6032. Ah, Foxxy Cleopatra.
  6033.  
  6034. 1378
  6035. 01:23:10,840 --> 01:23:15,590
  6036. It’s a shame l had to kill your partner.
  6037. Too bad for you.
  6038.  
  6039. 1379
  6040. 01:23:15,760 --> 01:23:19,680
  6041. Too bad for me?
  6042. How about too bad for you?
  6043.  
  6044. 1380
  6045. 01:23:19,850 --> 01:23:21,350
  6046. Oh, no.
  6047.  
  6048. 1381
  6049. 01:23:21,520 --> 01:23:25,180
  6050. No! No! No!
  6051.  
  6052. 1382
  6053. 01:23:25,350 --> 01:23:27,770
  6054. No....
  6055.  
  6056. 1383
  6057. 01:23:27,940 --> 01:23:29,940
  6058. Luckily, I keep a spare.
  6059.  
  6060. 1384
  6061. 01:23:33,690 --> 01:23:35,700
  6062. [METAL CLINKING]
  6063.  
  6064. 1385
  6065. 01:23:37,950 --> 01:23:39,120
  6066. Look, everyone.
  6067.  
  6068. 1386
  6069. 01:23:39,280 --> 01:23:41,370
  6070. My winkie was a key.
  6071.  
  6072. 1387
  6073. 01:23:41,540 --> 01:23:43,490
  6074. Only a bloody Dutchman.
  6075.  
  6076. 1388
  6077. 01:23:43,660 --> 01:23:45,620
  6078. -Ha-ha-ha.
  6079. -You mine, sucker.
  6080.  
  6081. 1389
  6082. 01:23:49,040 --> 01:23:50,040
  6083. Yes.
  6084.  
  6085. 1390
  6086. 01:23:50,210 --> 01:23:51,880
  6087. Foxxy, I’m coming.
  6088.  
  6089. 1391
  6090. 01:23:52,300 --> 01:23:55,840
  6091. Nobody try anything stupid
  6092. or the shooting begins.
  6093.  
  6094. 1392
  6095. 01:23:56,010 --> 01:23:59,890
  6096. Austin. Take Dougie.
  6097. I’ll stay here and be your backup.
  6098.  
  6099. 1393
  6100. 01:24:00,050 --> 01:24:05,140
  6101. -Dougie, what do we do?
  6102. -I’m not a real "hands-on evil genius."
  6103.  
  6104. 1394
  6105. 01:24:05,310 --> 01:24:07,560
  6106. Think. You were always the smart one.
  6107.  
  6108. 1395
  6109. 01:24:07,730 --> 01:24:11,810
  6110. Uh, l could reroute the output capacitor
  6111. to the tractor beam...
  6112.  
  6113. 1396
  6114. 01:24:11,980 --> 01:24:14,530
  6115. ...from one of the conduit boxes up there.
  6116.  
  6117. 1397
  6118. 01:24:14,690 --> 01:24:15,860
  6119. Come on, let's go.
  6120.  
  6121. 1398
  6122. 01:24:21,740 --> 01:24:24,580
  6123. Yes. The shooting begins.
  6124.  
  6125. 1399
  6126. 01:24:28,080 --> 01:24:29,420
  6127. Let me shoot.
  6128.  
  6129. 1400
  6130. 01:24:34,840 --> 01:24:36,210
  6131. You know, Dr. Evil...
  6132.  
  6133. 1401
  6134. 01:24:36,380 --> 01:24:39,260
  6135. -...l used to think you were crazy.
  6136. -l know.
  6137.  
  6138. 1402
  6139. 01:24:39,430 --> 01:24:42,970
  6140. But now l can see you're nuts.
  6141. l thank you.
  6142.  
  6143. 1403
  6144. 01:24:44,680 --> 01:24:45,810
  6145. Give me the gun.
  6146.  
  6147. 1404
  6148. 01:24:48,770 --> 01:24:50,100
  6149. Ow!
  6150.  
  6151. 1405
  6152. 01:24:59,110 --> 01:25:00,360
  6153. [LAUGHS MANIACALLY]
  6154.  
  6155. 1406
  6156. 01:25:00,530 --> 01:25:02,120
  6157. Hurry.
  6158.  
  6159. 1407
  6160. 01:25:05,620 --> 01:25:07,830
  6161. -Father. Father. Father.
  6162. EVIL: Ow!
  6163.  
  6164. 1408
  6165. 01:25:08,460 --> 01:25:10,790
  6166. [SINGS]
  6167. Father, can you hear me?
  6168.  
  6169. 1409
  6170. 01:25:10,960 --> 01:25:12,080
  6171. Father. Father.
  6172.  
  6173. 1410
  6174. 01:25:16,460 --> 01:25:17,630
  6175. IN UNISON:
  6176. Wow!
  6177.  
  6178. 1411
  6179. 01:25:20,380 --> 01:25:21,720
  6180. [CHEERING]
  6181.  
  6182. 1412
  6183. 01:25:22,970 --> 01:25:27,310
  6184. Well done, Austin.
  6185. He saved the world again.
  6186.  
  6187. 1413
  6188. 01:25:27,470 --> 01:25:29,430
  6189. AUSTIN:
  6190. Hey, yeah.
  6191.  
  6192. 1414
  6193. 01:25:29,600 --> 01:25:30,730
  6194. Thank you.
  6195.  
  6196. 1415
  6197. 01:25:30,890 --> 01:25:32,190
  6198. Right on.
  6199.  
  6200. 1416
  6201. 01:25:32,350 --> 01:25:35,770
  6202. -Austin, you did it.
  6203. -We did it.
  6204.  
  6205. 1417
  6206. 01:25:35,940 --> 01:25:37,980
  6207. Yeah, baby.
  6208.  
  6209. 1418
  6210. 01:25:39,650 --> 01:25:42,660
  6211. No? Just trying it on.
  6212.  
  6213. 1419
  6214. 01:25:44,580 --> 01:25:45,910
  6215. Goldmember?
  6216.  
  6217. 1420
  6218. 01:25:46,490 --> 01:25:47,990
  6219. You under arrest, sugar.
  6220.  
  6221. 1421
  6222. 01:25:51,120 --> 01:25:53,290
  6223. Hey, assholes.
  6224.  
  6225. 1422
  6226. 01:25:53,460 --> 01:25:58,000
  6227. Do l have time for a last smoke
  6228. and a pancake, or what?
  6229.  
  6230. 1423
  6231. 01:26:02,130 --> 01:26:06,300
  6232. I am from Holland. Isn't that weird?
  6233.  
  6234. 1424
  6235. 01:26:08,930 --> 01:26:10,060
  6236. Yeah.
  6237.  
  6238. 1425
  6239. 01:26:10,230 --> 01:26:12,440
  6240. Yes, well done.
  6241.  
  6242. 1426
  6243. 01:26:12,600 --> 01:26:14,650
  6244. Good on you, man.
  6245.  
  6246. 1427
  6247. 01:26:18,690 --> 01:26:19,690
  6248. Thank you.
  6249.  
  6250. 1428
  6251. 01:26:32,710 --> 01:26:34,040
  6252. [CHEERS]
  6253.  
  6254. 1429
  6255. 01:26:35,460 --> 01:26:36,460
  6256. Yes.
  6257.  
  6258. 1430
  6259. 01:26:38,590 --> 01:26:40,460
  6260. Hey, Powers.
  6261.  
  6262. 1431
  6263. 01:26:43,180 --> 01:26:47,010
  6264. Fat Bastard? But you're not fat anymore.
  6265.  
  6266. 1432
  6267. 01:26:47,180 --> 01:26:50,680
  6268. l went on the Subway diet.
  6269. You know, just like Jared.
  6270.  
  6271. 1433
  6272. 01:26:50,850 --> 01:26:53,060
  6273. I've lost 180 pounds.
  6274.  
  6275. 1434
  6276. 01:26:53,230 --> 01:26:54,810
  6277. Congratulations, baby.
  6278.  
  6279. 1435
  6280. 01:26:54,980 --> 01:26:58,650
  6281. Thank you. l do have a little bit
  6282. of excess skin, though.
  6283.  
  6284. 1436
  6285. 01:26:58,820 --> 01:27:00,400
  6286. Bit of a problem here, yeah.
  6287.  
  6288. 1437
  6289. 01:27:00,570 --> 01:27:04,650
  6290. And unfortunately,
  6291. my neck does look like a vagina.
  6292.  
  6293. 1438
  6294. 01:27:07,320 --> 01:27:09,200
  6295. MAN 1: Austin! Austin!
  6296. MAN 2: Over here.
  6297.  
  6298. 1439
  6299. 01:27:09,370 --> 01:27:12,040
  6300. [CROWD CHEERING]
  6301.  
  6302. 1440
  6303. 01:27:12,200 --> 01:27:13,620
  6304. WOMAN: Congratulations.
  6305. -Thank you.
  6306.  
  6307. 1441
  6308. 01:27:13,790 --> 01:27:15,580
  6309. MAN 3: Austin, you the boss!
  6310. -You all right?
  6311.  
  6312. 1442
  6313. 01:27:15,750 --> 01:27:18,170
  6314. MAN 4: Loved it!
  6315. -Okay.
  6316.  
  6317. 1443
  6318. 01:27:18,630 --> 01:27:19,840
  6319. Austin...
  6320.  
  6321. 1444
  6322. 01:27:20,590 --> 01:27:23,170
  6323. ...thank you for everything.
  6324.  
  6325. 1445
  6326. 01:27:28,970 --> 01:27:30,890
  6327. [CROWD CHEERS]
  6328.  
  6329. 1446
  6330. 01:27:31,470 --> 01:27:32,770
  6331. Shazam.
  6332.  
  6333. 1447
  6334. 01:27:44,990 --> 01:27:48,410
  6335. I’m gonna get you, Austin Powers.
  6336.  
  6337. 1448
  6338. 01:27:49,240 --> 01:27:51,240
  6339. [LAUGHING MANIACALLY]
  6340.  
  6341. 1449
  6342. 01:28:20,230 --> 01:28:22,190
  6343. Well, they're using the same
  6344. ****ing joke...
  6345.  
  6346. 1450
  6347. 01:28:22,360 --> 01:28:26,280
  6348. ...as they did in the last Austin Powers
  6349. film-- Movie-- What was it?
  6350.  
  6351. 1451
  6352. 01:28:26,450 --> 01:28:28,110
  6353. Well, they're using the-- Well--
  6354.  
  6355. 1452
  6356. 01:28:28,280 --> 01:28:31,570
  6357. Well, they're using the same joke
  6358. that they did-- Oh.
  6359.  
  6360. 1453
  6361. 01:28:32,660 --> 01:28:34,700
  6362. -What do l mean?
  6363. KELLY: Ha-ha-ha.
  6364.  
  6365. 1454
  6366. 01:28:34,870 --> 01:28:37,500
  6367. -Boobs, Ozzy.
  6368. -Stop, do that again.
  6369.  
  6370. 1455
  6371. 01:28:37,660 --> 01:28:39,080
  6372. You're starting to laugh.
  6373.  
  6374. 1456
  6375. 01:28:39,250 --> 01:28:40,290
  6376. [LAUGHS]
  6377.  
  6378. 1457
  6379. 01:28:40,460 --> 01:28:44,000
  6380. OZZY: Oh, don't start, Kelly,
  6381. or I'll put you back in the refrigerator.
  6382.  
  6383. 1458
  6384. 01:28:45,840 --> 01:28:46,840
  6385. MAN:
  6386. One more.
  6387.  
  6388. 1459
  6389. 01:28:47,010 --> 01:28:48,720
  6390. -l don't like that.
  6391. -A little serious.
  6392.  
  6393. 1460
  6394. 01:28:48,880 --> 01:28:51,090
  6395. Don't make that noise, Sharon.
  6396. I’m getting turned on.
  6397.  
  6398. 1461
  6399. 01:28:51,260 --> 01:28:53,640
  6400. My testosterone is going dancing.
  6401.  
  6402. 1462
  6403. 01:28:54,850 --> 01:28:55,850
  6404. Get off me.
  6405.  
  6406. 1463
  6407. 01:29:00,940 --> 01:29:03,940
  6408. Is--? Is it true what they say about you?
  6409.  
  6410. 1464
  6411. 01:29:06,990 --> 01:29:09,950
  6412. Kickstand. Really?
  6413.  
  6414. 1465
  6415. 01:29:10,110 --> 01:29:13,530
  6416. Um, can I give you my cell phone number?
  6417.  
  6418. 1466
  6419. 01:29:13,700 --> 01:29:14,870
  6420. Please?
  6421.  
  6422. 1467
  6423. 01:29:17,290 --> 01:29:20,370
  6424. AUSTIN: Ladies and gentlemen,
  6425. Mr. Burt Bacharach.
Add Comment
Please, Sign In to add comment